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Fightinghard

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35 minutes ago, Fightinghard said:

Should i reinstate?

@Fightinghard your description of symptoms is exactly the same as mine. I’m at 27 months now and improving. I chart my emotional and physical symptoms so I can see my improving trend on this rollercoaster. We will recover.

 

Regarding should i reinstate. I often asked the same question, I decided it was only resetting the clock (a bad thing) and a recent study has shown reinstatement only works for 50% of people and for the other 50% it can make things worse. Hang in there. Your windows will move from hours to days. I just had a 10 day window over Xmas which wasn’t the case in 2018 and 2019. 

 

 

50 mg Sertraline Nov 2016 to Dec 2016

100 mg Sertraline Jan - March 2017

50 mg Sertraline April - June 2017

25 mg Sertraline July 2017 - Sept 2018

12.5 mg Sertraline Oct 2018

0 mg Nov 1 2018

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Thanks @mstimc!    Great point!  Other than last night, I’ve been listening to ‘the Secret’ before bed.  Really working on visualizing myself recovered and’ normal’.  I have to determine my new ‘norma

Hi Fighting   Just an observation; I think you're doing a tremendous service to other SA members by sharing your progress and experiences.  A lot of people get discouraged because recovery r

I totally agree, sometimes I won't to be so focused on myself but we had to turn on our survival mode. As for me, sometimes waves have real triggers (like some change) but sometimes they come for

  • Mentor

I think its great you use this as a journal so you and others can track your progress! I, too, found that writing out my fears and feelings really helped.  In fact, it was part of my CBT practices when I was in recovery.  Putting it down on paper (virtually) is calming and help you see things more objectively.  Keep it up!

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

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Fightinghard

@DaBro  thanks for the information. Realistically i think reinstatement is long gone for me.  I’m ok with that.  As you know it’s just really hard done days.  
 

i skimmed your thread and see your sleeping better and generally doing better.  That’s great!  My sleep was actually doing decent and then i got hit with this wave.  The good news is I’m getting nights of longer sleep several times a week.  Hopefully it consolidated where I’m trying more good nights than bad nights.  
 

Thanks for the support!  Continued healing for you!

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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Fightinghard

@mstimc  i definitely hope it helps others as well.  It’s one of those things where when you’re in the dark places you need a place to go.  This is becoming my safe place in a sense.  I can voice my concerns and feelings to others.  I wish i didnt have the desire to come on here like i do for obvious reasons. But I’m glad it’s here for the times i need it.  The support from others like yourself is just incredible.  Thank you!

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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3 hours ago, Fightinghard said:

@DaBro  thanks for the information. Realistically i think reinstatement is long gone for me.  I’m ok with that.  As you know it’s just really hard done days.  
 

i skimmed your thread and see your sleeping better and generally doing better.  That’s great!  My sleep was actually doing decent and then i got hit with this wave.  The good news is I’m getting nights of longer sleep several times a week.  Hopefully it consolidated where I’m trying more good nights than bad nights.  
 

Thanks for the support!  Continued healing for you!

 

My sleeping was ok for a few months after 0. I got hit hard at 12 months post 0 and my sleep started to normalise at 24 months post 0

50 mg Sertraline Nov 2016 to Dec 2016

100 mg Sertraline Jan - March 2017

50 mg Sertraline April - June 2017

25 mg Sertraline July 2017 - Sept 2018

12.5 mg Sertraline Oct 2018

0 mg Nov 1 2018

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Fightinghard

As i get further along in this journey I’m learning that acceptance is an everyday practice.  It is really critical to help get through this. I can’t just think it;  i have to believe it.  Its coming along but it’s challenging for sure.  
 

So Thursday and Friday were okay days and nights.  I had some small widows during each day and into the evenings.  My sleep was better with 6-8 hours each night. Saturday morning i woke up with more morning anxiety than I’ve had lately.  It was not the worst Its been but noticeably higher. The day kind of followed suit.  I had a few brief windows of feeling ok but much of the day was higher anxiety or just generally feeling off. What’s hard are days that I don’t have alot to do. My mind stays active and i focus on how I’m feeling.  ‘Am i feeling better?  Oh wait My noise sensitivity is not there?  Noo, there it is.  I haven’t had a ‘tic’ in awhile?  There’s one now’. Point being i think and then things seem worse.  Its tough at times which I’m sure others can relate to. 
 

Last night was a bad night.  My wife has my middle son at a volleyball tournament so I’m solo with my 10 year old daughter and 15 year old son.  Frankly it’s pretty easy stuff at there ages.  The downfall for me is it throws off my evening schedule some. Not terrible but some.  Last night i decided to try to use my CPAP again.  It’s been since August when i stopped because i was having panic at night with it when WD started.  My wife mentioned recently I’d been snoring so i figured maybe i should try it again.   I lasted with it on for 20 minutes then i had to remove it.  I felt the anxiety building.  Long story short i had a nice panic/anxiety attack last night. It’s been awhile since I’ve had that level of anxiety.  I can think of a few nights here and there but not to that degree. So it was an uncomfortable, short night.  I did use Claire Weeks AAF which did ultimately help calm me down some.  
 

Symptom wise things continue to change for me.  The tics/twitches or as i like to say my ‘startled reflex’ has calmed down some. Its still there but not as often. The sound sensitivity is similar.  Its there but less noticeable for sure.  But like everything it can fluctuate up and down.  Hypnic jerks have reduced alot.  My anxiety was up some yesterday and obviously last night.  This morning its there but so far manageable.   I’m feeling off this morning but my other symptoms are not at the forefront.  Some apathy and just feeling low from last night.  I generally just feel bad.  
 

It looks like I’m cycling through short windows of feeling ‘ok’ with waves of different symptoms with different intensities.  My guess is i was in a ‘wave’ going into last night and the CPAP and all the changes made it even worse.  I’ll hunker down today and do my best. I just wrote my wife a long email telling her what she and the kids mean to me.  I love them dearly and just want to get back to myself.  I keep telling myself that i have to accept this situation for what it is.  If I had been in an accident of some type that required a period of healing it would be no different.  I just have to stay the course and treat myself well.  Don’t push too hard but move forward when you can. 
 

I’m hoping in the future that my posts are to share ‘good news.’ Like I’ve been in a long window of some duration.  Not yet i guess.  But i will. I guess i have had several windows the past few weeks. I stopped journaling symptoms and feelings because i thought it was keeping my thoughts negative but i think I’ll start up again.  But this time it’s going to be more about a wave or window and symptoms present.  I have to remember not everyone gets big windows.  Since people get gradual symptoms improving with short windows and waves. I guess I’ll find out where i fall when I’m done with this journey.  
 

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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Fightinghard

Today is a big day for me.  I’m getting my Covid vaccine.  I’m a little nervous being I’m in WD but i had the flu shot without much of an issue.  When i really thought about it, I’m probably more concerned about getting covid in WD than the possible side effects of the vaccine so i thought  I better just do it.  I’ll report back in the next few days.  

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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First night after the moderna covid shot and i had a rough night of insomnia. Fell asleep ok but woke up around midnight and had very light if any sleep the rest of the night.  I just felt off at that point.  As i would drift off to sleep and start to dream I’d get a surge of anxiety and just bad feelings which would wake me.  Kind of like a hypnic jerk but without the jerk.   I’ve had this before so I tried very soft music as a distraction.  Maybe it helped some.  To be fair to the shot, I’ve been cycling back and forth between good and bad nights with all kinds of experiences.  I think Saturday night i had a panic attack at night.  So I’m trying to chalk this up to a continued wave I’m in versus the actual shot.  I’m guessing the shot didn’t help matters but who really knows.  Yesterday as a whole was an up and down day. I’d say i had several hours of windows with minimal symptoms until later in the afternoon and into early evening.  Then i had some inner restlessness, especially in my legs, pop up for a good hour or so. That subsided and I’d say i again was in a window.  Not my old self but symptoms were low other than some light anxiety.    
 

My theory is my body is trying to heal the different symptoms and I’m going through each one, one by one and ‘fixing’ them.  So I’ll get a wave of twitches, tics and sound sensitivity that calms down only to be replaced by some anxiety.  It seems that i get an intense symptom that slowly diminishes over a week or so. Then it’s still there but much less.  Like my sound sensitivity.  Last weekend i was very uncomfortable with many noises.  I was wearing ear plugs while driving for most of the day.  The past few days it’s still there but i don’t notice it much at all.  Same with the ‘twitches’ or startling reflex.  Last week I would move to grab something quickly and my body would ‘twitch’.  It still happens but less intense and less often for sure. Anxiety was very low and then it came back but not as intense as previously.   Insomnia is the interesting one for me because it’s changed for me the past few weeks.  My hypothesis is that the issue is really about the overactive alerting system and general cortisol production.  I think both of these things are being ‘fixed’.  The intensity of my panic at night is far less if i even get it.  The intensity of the surges are less than back in the beginning.  So while the outcome is about  the same on a bad night, i think it’s actually improving some. Plus, over the past month or so I’ve had probably 7 or more ‘good nights’ of 7 or more hours.  These nights I’ve had 5-6 hours straight and then fell back to sleep for a few more. So it’s a windows and waves pattern. 
 

I’ll see how today goes.  Outside of my arm being sore, i don’t have any other side effects from the shot.  I’m hoping things calm down like previous waves and tonight i sleep better.  It will be a long day today but it is what it is.  I’ll push through.   My fears about recovery are slowly decreasing.  I’m believing more and more that i will recover and that i just accept what this is each day.  
 

I’ve said this before but I feel compelled to say it again; I’m so thankful for this community and all that it offers.  This is an incredibly hard thing to go through that only those that experience it can understand.  

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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  • Mentor
19 minutes ago, Fightinghard said:

This is an incredibly hard thing to go through that only those that experience it can understand.  

So true!  Even after several years post-recovery, when my anxious thinking temporary flares up, my wife is totally supportive but still can't fully comprehend why I just can't "let go."  Places like this, where we can share fears, setbacks and successes without judgement, are just so vital to recovery.  

 

Glad to hear your first vaccine dose went well.  We'll probably get ours around the end of April or in May if the government's schedule holds.  It'll be nice for all of us when this is under control.

 

Take care!

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

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@mstimc  My wife and i have had some conversations lately they have been hard.  Not necessarily argumentative but i realize she really doesn’t understand and i think she believes a lot of this in my control.  I told her that some of this is ‘me’ and side of it is withdrawal.  But the tough part is the WD does just take time.  She’s been great and ultra supportive So I’m not complaining but it was just hard when people think it’s all ‘you’.  How can it still be the meds type of thing.  I seriously considered reinstatement after that conversation. But at 6 plus months out with a complicated few months of drugs I’m not sure it would be a good idea.  The idea of going backwards scares me.   Ive come this far.  Even though today at this moment I’m feeling the feelings like will this get better, etc i logically know it has gotten better and it will get better. 
 

I was hesitant to get the shot because of WD but getting covid while in WD seems like a bad mix. I hope you’re doing well in these interesting times.  Glad you’re slated for the shots in the near future.  I appreciate your continued support and friendship during this process.  When I’m looking back at this journey I realize that there are good things that are happening as i move forward.  Your support is something that stands out for me.  Thank you. 
 

 

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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  • Mentor
17 minutes ago, Fightinghard said:

I appreciate your continued support and friendship during this process.  When I’m looking back at this journey I realize that there are good things that are happening as i move forward.  Your support is something that stands out for me.  Thank you. 

One day I'm sure you'll pay it forward for another person in WD and recovery, too!

 

My wife and I had the same kind of conversations a few times as well.   As long as there's communication--that's the important thing.  I've tried to meet her in the middle by doing meditation and mindfulness, and I think she appreciates that.   Most of society still thinks behavioral issues are all in the mind.  It reminds me of Shakespeare from Romeo & Juliet: "He jests at scars that never felt a wound."

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

Link to post

Quick update from the Covid shot. Yesterday was a long day after very little sleep but it wasn’t terrible.  Some anxiety, restlessness and melancholy feelings mixed in with small windows. Last night i slept!  I did wake up at 4:15 to use the bathroom but in went back to sleep so I’d guess 8-9 hours total?    Not totally normal sleep but much better.  Sound sensitivity and twitches/tics have been low.  In terms of the shot, my arm is sore but nothing else.  I think it did very little to my WD symptoms if anything.  We’ll see how today goes.  No AM anxiety today but I’m feeling more ‘down’. That’s typical for me when I sleep more.  

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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Thank you @FightinghardI'm very unsure about the vaccine during w/d, so your reports are really helpful.  🙏

Best wishes as we all go through this recovery,

Arbor

Zoloft: 1995 - 2015

Prozac: 2015 - 2018 (tapered from 40mg x day on July 31 to 30mg on August 31 to 20mg on September 31 to 10mg October 31 to 0mg on  December 15, 2018

Gabapentin: 2016 to 2019  (tapered from 300mg x day to 150mg on August 31, 2019 to 75mg on September 15 to 50mg on September 31 to 25ishmg on October 15 to 0mg on December 1, 2019

Enalapril: 2010 - 2019

Lipitor: 2017 -2017

Metformin: 2000 - 2020

Liothyronine: 2007 - 2019

Levothyroxine: 2000 - 

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Hey @Fightinghard, I'm pleased to hear the vaccination went well for you. 

 

I have a question for you. How do you deal with the hypnic jerks and tics? This is the area that I am struggling with the most at the moment. I've barely slept for the past two nights and I think its because I got a couple of jerks when drifting off to sleep and then my brain has just 'switched on' out of fear. 

 

Interestingly, I got a few jerks a few months ago when I dropped off my AD and then re-instated a day later but they didn't bother me so much as I knew it was a withdrawal symptom. However because I've had no change in my dose for three months now, I think my mindset has shifted and at times i get a sense of fear. Its hard to explain but I think I kept thinking 'maybe i'm a lucky one.. maybe i'll get out of this with minimal symptoms' then bam.. insomnia.. depression.. jerks. 

 

I love my husband and I love my family and I want to be strong for them (and me!). Do you have any tips on what has helped you to not fear the jerks? 

 

Also, I've checked out Claire Weeks on your recommendation. What an amazing lady. A lot of truth in what she says. 

 

Temazepan (for sleeep)- as required (no more than one per week) June/July 2020

Valdoxan (for sleep) - 2 weeks in July 2020 - no taper as not required for this drug so stopped straight away 

Temazepan again - July/August - as required, noticed interdose withdrawals - fast taper - last dose 4th October 2020

Citalopram (for panic/anxiety which I suspect was due to the other drugs) - 26th August 2020 - have been tapering since 8th October (20mg>15mg (one week)>10mg(one week)>5mg(one week)>2.5mg (one week). Jumped 1st November - 2 days later had anxiety, insomnia, meloncolic jerks. Reinstated 2.5mg and currently tapering from here. 

 

Supplements - Fish Oil, Probiotic, Vitamin C

 

 

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I’m so sorry to hear you’re having a tough time.  It’s such a struggle!   I’m in this pattern of sleep pretty good one night and then not so good the next night.  The past 2 weeks or so I’ve had 7 nights of at least 7 hours of sleep and then probably 4 nights of 2-3 hours sleep.  I’m glad I’m having some good nights but the bad nights are really hard.  Like you said you want to be there for your spouse and your family but it’s so hard.  
 

Interestingly enough, my ‘jerks’ and tics have calmed down some.  They still are there but not as bad.  That said, as i start to drift off to sleep i get this ‘surge’ of anxiety/fear feeling.  Very similar to how i feel after a ‘jerk’ but not as intense.  Alto told me that this is your alerting system waking you up because it thinks you’re going unconscious.  Her suggestion was to play soft music so that you can barely hear it. This will not let you get to deep into sleep and then you are less likely to get the jerks or surges.  I’ve done it several nights with moderate success.  Meaning i slept more but not necessarily good.  I also will sleep in a chair sitting up or other positions to try to have the same effect where this hypersensitive alerting system doesn’t react.  I can’t say this helps but i try!   It does get better over time.  What I’ve concluded is the fear and anxiety when it’s happening is a product of the alerting system.  You get a surge of cortisol m/adrenaline which gives you those feelings when it’s happening. At least that’s what it seems like.  I’m glad you’ve started Claire Weeks.  I believe it ‘helps’ with this.  Meaning it may not stop them but if you can accept the situation you’re not going to compound the issue with even more anxiety and fear.  Which is how i don’t ‘fear’ them when they’re not happening.   Truly you fear what you are going to feel.   Which creates the anxiety and it then gets worse.   So if you can accept them and surrender to them it seems to help reduce the fear.   Easier said than done but i do believe for me it’s beneficial.  I have faith we will get better. Last night was awful for me.  2-3 hours of bad sleep.  But the night before was very good.  8-9 hours of solid sleep (i wake up one time and then back to sleep).  I focus on the good nights and assume my brain is learning/repairing my sleep and eventually it will return. 
 

I wish i had a great answer for this.  I think because time is the solution for WD, acceptance is critical. It’s super hard but it does help.  I’m just starting to really get the hang of acceptance of symptoms, etc and I’m 6 months out.  I’m realizing more and more i will get better and time is the answer.  I try not to focus on how long.  yesterday I was in a decent window thinking ‘I’m almost done’.  Today i feel the opposite ‘will i make it’.  But again, i am better overall and symptoms are reducing or leaving altogether.   Everyone is different.  
 

You’ll get through this.  I hope this kind of answers your question.  I’d also look up ‘the anxious truth’ podcast and book.  I can’t remember if in shared that.  He follows Claire Weeks principles but seems to simplify it. I hope you feel better soon!

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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@Calmseeker i forgot to tag you in my previous post...

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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Hey @Fightinghard

 

Thanks so much for all of your advice. Its really nice to speak with someone who is going through the same thing. Yes, I've found 'The Anxious Truth' podcast through your recommendation and I actually listened to an episode this morning on my drive to work. Its a good one! Claire Weeks is also really good to listen to, I've been listening to a few of her clips on youtube. 

 

I also tried the soft music and whilst I didnt feel like I got much sleep as such, I certainly was able to relax and felt somewhat restored the next day. 

 

I have to keep remembering that this is like running a marathon rather than a sprint. Patience is the key really. The other night I actually had to say to myself 'I need to sit with my discomfort' and so I did. I just sat there, feeling the discomfort and it eventually passed. This has been helpful at times. 

 

Its such a complex journey to go on because on one hand I am dealing with my baseline anxiety which has been heightened by a sensitive nervous system. I'm also dealing with the symptoms of withdrawal. I never ever would have imagined that withdrawal symptoms would last so long. This is the part that really throws me off. It is such a 'psychological marathon'. 

 

I wear a fitbit so it helps me to keep a track of my sleep and my heart rate. When I have had a bad night or I'm feeling symptoms my brain actually over catastrophes it. I start telling myself 'I havent slept in a week' or 'I have felt terrible for so long'. However when I look back at the data, it actually tells me a different story. Its interesting how psychology works. 

 

Anyway, I hope you are doing well and thanks again for your support during this journey when you are also suffering yourself. I really appreciate it. 

Temazepan (for sleeep)- as required (no more than one per week) June/July 2020

Valdoxan (for sleep) - 2 weeks in July 2020 - no taper as not required for this drug so stopped straight away 

Temazepan again - July/August - as required, noticed interdose withdrawals - fast taper - last dose 4th October 2020

Citalopram (for panic/anxiety which I suspect was due to the other drugs) - 26th August 2020 - have been tapering since 8th October (20mg>15mg (one week)>10mg(one week)>5mg(one week)>2.5mg (one week). Jumped 1st November - 2 days later had anxiety, insomnia, meloncolic jerks. Reinstated 2.5mg and currently tapering from here. 

 

Supplements - Fish Oil, Probiotic, Vitamin C

 

 

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@Calmseeker  no problem!  It’s impossible to understand what this is like unless you go through it. So peer support is critical.  I’ve been blessed during my journey with some incredible support from members of this site.  Its invaluable.  
 

Learning to manage your anxiety and accept the WD will help you along the way.  They are skills that will last beyond WD.  2 other things I’ve practiced during WD is gratitude and visualization/meditation.   I make sure that everyday I’m thankful for things i encounter.  Whether it’s my family or a delicious meal, i try to have gratitude for what it is.  Many nights I’ve laid there awake and I’d be thankful for that time because i knew my brain was healing.  I have to go through the hard times to get to the good times.  The last thing is (especially when meditating) i visualize my life as being healed.   In the present. I believe ‘you have to see it to be it’.  in the same realm i enjoy a loving kindness mediation.  Early on, maybe the first month of WD i did it every night and many nights it was my only ‘relief’. It would put a smile on my face.  These things have helped me stay grounded in some tough times.   It’s not easy but they help me.  
 

I continue to struggle weekly but overall things are slowly improving.  Last night I slept 8:30 hours!  Over last 2 weeks that’s 6 nights of over 7 hours and 8 nights of 6 hours.  It’s slowly improving for sure. As are all my symptoms. 
 

you’re so right, this is a marathon and We all run it at our own pace.  You’ll get there. Just keep focused on your race knowing you’ll finish it.  
 

thank you for your kind words of support!  We’ve got this!  

2003-2006-  Zoloft then Wellbutrin, Ritalin, concerta , Adderall.  Don’t remember dosage, tapers or timeframes. ADD treatment. I think I had some WD?  Definitely PSSD which resolved over time. 

Zoloft  100 MG April18-april 22, 2020

Buspirone 20 mg from April 18-May 18

10 mg from May 18 - May 27 2020

Lexapro 5 mg from April 22 through May 1st

10 mg from May 1 through June 1

5 mg from June 1 though june 18

2.5 mg from June 18 through June 25

1.25 mg from June 25 through July 4 2020

Ambien -  2.5 mg  April 21 and 26 2020

Trazodone 50 mg-  3 times late April and 4 days the first week in June 2020

Supplements:  Omega 3’s 1000 mg 3 X a day,  Magnesium Glycinate 400 mg (now 4 times a day), Melatonin 1 mg, Vitamin C 1000 mg, probiotics.

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