Fightinghard: overcoming

[Fightinghard]

I’ve decided to do a quick post. I’m not sure what to call us. Is it a success story or just a new chapter. That said, I just wanted to let everyone know I’ve come a very long way. At some point this journey I was unable to leave my house. I couldn’t leave my office. I couldn’t sit with my kids and talk to them. I couldn’t drive. I could hardly walk to the mailbox. I couldn’t spend time with my wife. I couldn’t read. I couldn’t watch TV. Couldn’t play games. I couldn’t think. I had no positive feelings. I was in a constant state of fighter flight. I paste I was agitated I had depression I had it all. If you read my thread, I didn’t start out as bad as I just described. I was not in a good place. I did always push myself in those early stages. I did a lot of things.  I had a major setback probably about nine or 10 months into my recovery. For me, stopping melatonin and changing the dosage took my withdrawal to a whole Nother level. Remember writing a note to my best friend and wife evening. It was probably three in the morning. I was going through an extreme state of terror, and I basically wrote goodbye notes to them.  I didn’t know how I was going to survive. I wish I could say that was the only time I experienced those extreme feelings and emotions, but it wasn’t. That all said three beautiful children. And in those moments I did what I could to put my focus on them.  What they meant to me. And what I meant to them. So I got through that horrific stage. Part of my growth during this journey has been learning to understand my anxiety disorder that led me to the medication‘s. I never realized how anxious I was before I  Entered this adverse state created by the medication‘s. So in a sense while horrific, the experience has allowed me to heal in ways, I never would’ve without them. I’ve learned about Clare weeks approach to symptoms as I’ve mentioned many times before I’m a big believer in the anxious truth, and their approach to anxiety disorders.  I unquestionably believe that following these principles along my healing journey has allowed me to grow and heal and away, but I never would’ve without them.

 

So what’s help me along the way I’ve tried every supplement different diets you name it I’ve tried a lot. Of all the supplements, the one that I believed, help me the most  Was vitamin C. For me, most supplements in the end, outside of vitamin C, really weren’t helpful and for me somewhere actually detrimental. We’re all different so we have to find our own path, but I’ve chosen to take a path of just eating, healthy and eating foods, high in minerals and vitamins, and rely on that to provide a balanced Intake of what I need. I definitely have exercised as much as I can throughout this journey and it’s actually very quite a bit. I currently exercise every day where I walk or do light jogging or light light workouts every day. Frankly, I’m not where I wanna be, but I am in a much better place.  I have no doubt with time ability exercise will only increase. Let’s be honest I never took meds and I hadn’t worked out intensely of course would be harder to get back to a high-level of exercise.

 

So I’m writing this to frankly close this chapter. To move forward to leave this community not because I don’t appreciate it and not because I’m not forever grateful for all the support I’ve received, but more so to allow me to continue to heal , in a way that allow me to help others in the future. 
 

@mstimc@KenA@Phoenixmama thank you guys for always encouraging me and supporting me.  I’m forever thankful and grateful.  Frankly I’ve not reread what I’ve written.  I actually dictated it. Hopefully it is coherent. I’m running later for work so I’m trying to get this out there.   I’m not leaving this group I’m just moving on to life beyond WD and meds!  

[mstimc]

Godspeed, Fighting.  You are an inspiration to so many new memebers!

[KenA]

Best of luck in your continued journey of healing @Fightinghard! Wish you all the best my friend!

[KaiLee]

Keep going on, my friend.