HopingnWaiting: extreme emotions

[HopingNWaiting]

Went to a new primary care doctor as I needed a physical.  Was really curious if my bloodwork would show anything (I am doubting it).

I was nervous to explain my withdrawal from ADs as I know doctors can be dismissive.  Sadly, I was right.

I've been experiencing PMDD since December and that was something I have NEVER dealt with prior to withdrawal.  I mentioned I was seeing a therapist, but she kept repeating that a psychiatrist may be helpful as well.  At least for a short time period.

 

She said I had a normal taper (at 2 months) and I shouldn't still be feeling like this.

She also suggested I go back to my gyno and talk about my PMDD.  That isn't a terrible idea, but I felt she was trying to push birth control back on me.  

It's infuriating to not have help.  It feels so lonely.  

I've been having OK days.  They aren't perfect, but they are manageable.  I miss being me.  I miss feeling love and happiness.  I just kind of go through the motions of the day.  It feels as if life is passing me by.

I know that whoever reads this will understand.  It's so unfair that we are treated like this.

I'm trying everything and it is so frustrating to still not be well.  

[Greatful]

@HopingNWaiting

Waiting  to be done with this nightmare is the most hardest part of WD.  Very sad the doctors are so clueless.........having okay days is great.....Some don't get even okay days for awhile.  Try not look to far into the future...All we have is today anyway........Looking to the future with the gray lens over our minds and thoughts will make getting through this harder.......Find as many things that will motive you to take each day as it comes.......How is your meditation going?  

I really can relate to the day to day struggle and you are not alone at all.❤️

I am reading the book Recovery and Renewal by Baylissa Frederick  You can buy it on Amazon....great book.  She recovered from protracted WD from Benzo's   She also has a website https://baylissa.com/

 

the next time you go to the doctor bring 

http:// Stopping antidepressants

 

http:// Major milestone: Royal College releases new guidance on stopping antidepressants

 

Hang it the.  Everyday is 1 day closer to being back to normal😊

[KittenLePurr]

On 12/30/2021 at 6:08 PM, HopingNWaiting said:

Part of me wants all of us to ban together and shout this from the rooftops.  It angers and saddens me to think this is allowed by pharmaceutical companies and medical professionals.  Horrifies me.  No one should have to endure this.

Hey there; I share your anger at and distrust of medical professionals. In a really deep, fiery way! 😡 And the truth is: pharmaceuticals are extremely risky. I personally fear being in a situation where I'm depending on them or on the medical system, too because there are always risks, and some of us are more sensitive to them than others, just as some of us are more sensitive to AD withdrawal while others can do a quick taper and be fine. That's not to say they don't have a time and place but doctors are trained to push pharmaceuticals and lump us all together like medicine is one-size-fits-all, and it is not. I could keep going. Rant about it all the time to my fiance but here's my point... You have every right to be weary and frustrated and angry, and I'm sorry your doctors have been gaslighting you. It is all too common but you are seeking alternative support and taking care of yourself, and that is great. You will get through this. Remind yourself every chance you get to take a deep breath and that you will get through this.

 

Gotta say I'm happy to hear you're focusing on a good diet. That's one of the things that's helped me the most, both in w/d and with depression and anxiety, in general. One thought on dairy: are you able to get raw dairy where you live? Not sure it's as big a deal for you but I've never had a good reaction to regular dairy foods, and being in w/d and therefore having bloating and digestive issues already, dairy makes it that much worse--except for the raw cheddar my local grocery has. Raw dairy affects the body much differently so if you have digestives issues and can get a raw cheese, it may be worth experimenting with. Still don't need to obsess or be perfect, like you said  Hang in there.

 

Do you meditate? It's another one of my saving graces. Seriously a life-saver. 

[HopingNWaiting]

On 1/31/2022 at 1:34 PM, Greatful said:

@HopingNWaiting

Waiting  to be done with this nightmare is the most hardest part of WD.  Very sad the doctors are so clueless.........having okay days is great.....Some don't get even okay days for awhile.  Try not look to far into the future...All we have is today anyway........Looking to the future with the gray lens over our minds and thoughts will make getting through this harder.......Find as many things that will motive you to take each day as it comes.......How is your meditation going?  

I really can relate to the day to day struggle and you are not alone at all.❤️

I am reading the book Recovery and Renewal by Baylissa Frederick  You can buy it on Amazon....great book.  She recovered from protracted WD from Benzo's   She also has a website https://baylissa.com/

 

the next time you go to the doctor bring 

http:// Stopping antidepressants

 

http:// Major milestone: Royal College releases new guidance on stopping antidepressants

 

Hang it the.  Everyday is 1 day closer to being back to normal😊

Hey there Greatful,

Thanks for popping back in here and chatting with me.  

I've downloaded Baylissa's book you recommend and am hoping to start it this week.  Thank you for the recommendation!

Still giving meditation a try every evening, but nothing is really standing out to me.  I'm still having difficulty finding ones I like and want to go back to.  For some reason, I seem to be resistant to it and I am not sure why.

Most of my bloodwork came back.  I can see the lab reports online, but waiting for the Doctor call to explain my results.  Doesn't seem like anything is seriously off though.  I'm not sure if she did a vitamin check so I need to review carefully again.

Next week marks 4 months off Luvox.  Seems kind of surreal.  

Thanks again and I hope all is well with you.

[HopingNWaiting]

On 1/31/2022 at 6:13 PM, KittenLePurr said:

Hey there; I share your anger at and distrust of medical professionals. In a really deep, fiery way! 😡 And the truth is: pharmaceuticals are extremely risky. I personally fear being in a situation where I'm depending on them or on the medical system, too because there are always risks, and some of us are more sensitive to them than others, just as some of us are more sensitive to AD withdrawal while others can do a quick taper and be fine. That's not to say they don't have a time and place but doctors are trained to push pharmaceuticals and lump us all together like medicine is one-size-fits-all, and it is not. I could keep going. Rant about it all the time to my fiance but here's my point... You have every right to be weary and frustrated and angry, and I'm sorry your doctors have been gaslighting you. It is all too common but you are seeking alternative support and taking care of yourself, and that is great. You will get through this. Remind yourself every chance you get to take a deep breath and that you will get through this.

 

Gotta say I'm happy to hear you're focusing on a good diet. That's one of the things that's helped me the most, both in w/d and with depression and anxiety, in general. One thought on dairy: are you able to get raw dairy where you live? Not sure it's as big a deal for you but I've never had a good reaction to regular dairy foods, and being in w/d and therefore having bloating and digestive issues already, dairy makes it that much worse--except for the raw cheddar my local grocery has. Raw dairy affects the body much differently so if you have digestives issues and can get a raw cheese, it may be worth experimenting with. Still don't need to obsess or be perfect, like you said  Hang in there.

 

Do you meditate? It's another one of my saving graces. Seriously a life-saver. 

Hi KittenLePurr,

I vent to my fiancé about medical professionals A LOT lately.  I want the world to know THE TRUTH!  If I had known all of this before taking this medication, my life may be very different.  People need to make a completely informed decision and it's unfair we are not given that right.  I don't want to take anyone down, but I just want to raise awareness.  It's all so maddening, but you know that!  We all know that now.  Sadly we had to learn the hard way.

Honestly, I wouldn't believe the diet thing unless I experienced it myself.  It's amazing how eating certain foods started to calm the very loud, angry and mile-a-minute intrusive thoughts.   Sometimes I miss certain foods, but it's hard to think about going back when you feel so good.  

To be honest, I haven't a clue about raw dairy!  Will need to investigate.  Thank you!

Any meditation recommendations?  I am struggling finding something I like.  I found one that was so beautiful, but I was crying!  I don't want to cry anymore LOL

Thanks for popping in and chatting with me.

[Greatful]

@HopingNWaiting

Are you doing the guided meditations?  Have you tried to do the quiet just focusing on your breath?  I used the head space also..  These are less guided and more focusing on your breath........These teach you to acknowledge your thoughts and gently refocus on your breath....I think they have free trail period.  I paid for the year, I thought it was pretty cheep......Check it out to see if it might work for you 

Meditation is some thing that takes time and practice.  Just keep doing it for awhile and give it a chance to start showing positive results.

It has really helped me not get so caught up in my thoughts.

 

Wow that's great 4 months of being off of your drug......

Hang in there😊

[KittenLePurr]

On 2/2/2022 at 8:51 AM, HopingNWaiting said:

People need to make a completely informed decision and it's unfair we are not given that right.  I don't want to take anyone down, but I just want to raise awareness.  It's all so maddening, but you know that!  We all know that now.  Sadly we had to learn the hard way.

100% agree. And I think most doctors genuinely want to help people and think they're doing the right thing; it's what they've been taught. And our experiences put all that into question and they just kinda can't hear it. More and more people are realizing we've been going about things in not-the-best way when it comes to medicine, and it takes people like us who've experienced the downsides firsthand to turn the tide (lucky us) so at the risk of sounding not very humble, I like to tell myself I was chosen and my experiences are important for that reason.😄 That helps. But the rage is still there, and maybe also an important part of the experience...because learning to hold that anger is growth. And feelings of betrayal, having trusted someone and a system who promised healing and didn't deliver. We can give that to ourselves...in time.

On 2/2/2022 at 8:51 AM, HopingNWaiting said:

Honestly, I wouldn't believe the diet thing unless I experienced it myself.  It's amazing how eating certain foods started to calm the very loud, angry and mile-a-minute intrusive thoughts.   Sometimes I miss certain foods, but it's hard to think about going back when you feel so good.  

 

To be honest, I haven't a clue about raw dairy!  Will need to investigate.  Thank you!
 

For sure! I didn't believe it either until I felt it. And yeah, raw milk is mostly illegal I think and raw cheese is heavily regulated for safety reasons, but any raw cheese you get has to be aged at least 60 days to be sold, which makes it safe. And the body processes it totally differently. Pasteurization has a purpose, of course, but it changes the way we digest and kills all the good bacteria. Good bacteria in the gut is everything!

 

On 2/2/2022 at 8:51 AM, HopingNWaiting said:

Any meditation recommendations?  I am struggling finding something I like.  I found one that was so beautiful, but I was crying!  I don't want to cry anymore LOL

I use Insight Timer and change it up a lot but tend to go back to mindfulness of thoughts meditations a lot, since the intrusive thoughts can feel so destabilizing. I've done this one a few times recently and like it a lot: https://insig.ht/iiTDJqvKlnb But try different styles and see what feels good to you. I like Insight Timer because it has so much variety

[HopingNWaiting]

On 2/2/2022 at 9:59 AM, Greatful said:

@HopingNWaiting

Are you doing the guided meditations?  Have you tried to do the quiet just focusing on your breath?  I used the head space also..  These are less guided and more focusing on your breath........These teach you to acknowledge your thoughts and gently refocus on your breath....I think they have free trail period.  I paid for the year, I thought it was pretty cheep......Check it out to see if it might work for you 

Meditation is some thing that takes time and practice.  Just keep doing it for awhile and give it a chance to start showing positive results.

It has really helped me not get so caught up in my thoughts.

 

Wow that's great 4 months of being off of your drug......

Hang in there😊

 

I found a nice guided meditation for intrusive thoughts on Insight Timer (app).

 

Wanted to share here in case it may help someone else - Control Intrusive Thoughts by Andrew Johnson

Still trying to find other meditations that I enjoy.  I thought it would be easier to find stuff I like!

[HopingNWaiting]

On 2/3/2022 at 10:49 AM, KittenLePurr said:

100% agree. And I think most doctors genuinely want to help people and think they're doing the right thing; it's what they've been taught. And our experiences put all that into question and they just kinda can't hear it. More and more people are realizing we've been going about things in not-the-best way when it comes to medicine, and it takes people like us who've experienced the downsides firsthand to turn the tide (lucky us) so at the risk of sounding not very humble, I like to tell myself I was chosen and my experiences are important for that reason.😄 That helps. But the rage is still there, and maybe also an important part of the experience...because learning to hold that anger is growth. And feelings of betrayal, having trusted someone and a system who promised healing and didn't deliver. We can give that to ourselves...in time.

For sure! I didn't believe it either until I felt it. And yeah, raw milk is mostly illegal I think and raw cheese is heavily regulated for safety reasons, but any raw cheese you get has to be aged at least 60 days to be sold, which makes it safe. And the body processes it totally differently. Pasteurization has a purpose, of course, but it changes the way we digest and kills all the good bacteria. Good bacteria in the gut is everything!

 

I use Insight Timer and change it up a lot but tend to go back to mindfulness of thoughts meditations a lot, since the intrusive thoughts can feel so destabilizing. I've done this one a few times recently and like it a lot: https://insig.ht/iiTDJqvKlnb But try different styles and see what feels good to you. I like Insight Timer because it has so much variety

I just mentioned a great meditation I found on Insight Timer in my post above - Control Intrusive Thoughts by Andrew Johnson.  That one really resonated with me.  Still trying to find more but am having a hard time.  I am being so particular.  It's one of those things where I need to set time aside and REALLY go through them, but I am being obstinate

I don't want to jinx myself, but Magnesium seems to be helping.  I started introducing in (slowly) 2 weeks ago.  The past 2 nights I actually slept well!  I couldn't believe it.  I bought some fish oil and vitamin E, but am going to wait a little bit more before I start taking them.  I want to get more settled with Magnesium first.

Your words above about doctors and medical care...you said everything I am thinking.  You put that well.  

[KittenLePurr]

On 2/6/2022 at 8:40 PM, HopingNWaiting said:

I just mentioned a great meditation I found on Insight Timer in my post above - Control Intrusive Thoughts by Andrew Johnson.  That one really resonated with me.  Still trying to find more but am having a hard time.  I am being so particular.  It's one of those things where I need to set time aside and REALLY go through them, but I am being obstinate

I'm pretty picky too! For a while I would just search for keywords like "thinking" or "thoughts" or whatever in Insight Timer and bookmark meditations that looked promising. Then I ended up with like 60 bookmarks and it got totally overwhelming🤣 Eventually went back and created playlists to organize them, and occasionally I'll kinda skim through them to see if they resonate, and if not, delete them. But usually I just try a new one and if it sucks, I stop and move onto the next. Thanks for mentioning that one about intrusive thoughts; I'm going to check it out. Been struggling with intrusive thoughts a lot, maybe even more than usual the past few days.

 

I'm glad you found relief with magnesium! I absolutely love it. Fish oil, too. They're amazingly calming. But yes, go slow, be gentle. Listen to your body

[Yesyes123]

On 12/13/2021 at 12:30 PM, HopingNWaiting said:

I'm in a very dark, sad place and am in desperate need of some hope and light. 

 

Hello!

This is a very common state of mind brought on by psychiatric drug withdrawal syndrome.

Please be aware this is not who you truly are, and you will definitely not remain in this mental state forever - with some luck, not even for too long.

 

Time is the best healer when it comes to problems caused by psychiatric drugs.

Each person reacts differently, so it might not be a good thing to compare your situation to other people's here on the forums.

 

You might heal much faster than most people.

Sending you peace and healing.

[HopingNWaiting]

Hi Everyone,

Was waiting to post until I got my period.  I am happy to report that I am doing MUCH better this menstrual cycle.  The difference is pretty amazing.  Still have work to do, but my family and I have seen a major improvement.

I'm thinking Magnesium took me the extra mile with reducing my PMDD symptoms I was experiencing since stopping Luvox.  I am now taking 50mg of chelated Mag 4x/daily.  Epsom salt baths have been simply amazing as well.

I'm contemplating discontinuing Evening Primrose Oil though.  I will say that this is the first period where I am up to 1000mg of it (the last 2 months were at 500mg) so perhaps it did help me? However, I am breaking out badly.  It could be EPO or just the changes my body is experiencing that is causing the acne.  Part of my wants to stop EPO to test, but a part of me is also scared.

Still dealing with depressing intrusive thoughts and working with my therapist.  I just want these thoughts and depression to go away so badly.  I keep reminding myself of the progress I have made though.  Can be hard to see at some moments, but the progress is there.

Hope everyone is doing well.

[HopingNWaiting]

Hi everyone. 

I like to pop in from time to time and leave an update.  Maybe...just maybe...it may help someone.

With SA's advice, I am continuing my supplement journey.  I've discontinued Evening Primrose Oil as I saw no real positive effect.  I also believe it may have caused acne (my skin has been a mess).

My main focus became Magnesium which I feel has had the biggest and most positive impact on me (besides diet - DIET IS ALSO KEY!).  I truly believe it helped eliminate the horrific PMDD I was experiencing.  It also helped "turn down the volume" on my intrusive thoughts.

I then started Fish Oil and Vitamin E.  My most recent addition has been Niacinamide.

I am waiting on Curcumin Bioperine to arrive tomorrow and will try to add that.

Do I still have intrusive thoughts?  Yes, but they are very low and don't control me as much.  It's mostly about the meaning of life and worrying about death.  I am continuing my work with my therapist.

I have OCD and was always someone who was extremely neat and organized.  Withdrawal me wasn't able to keep up with my intense cleaning and organization though.  My bedroom closet really felt the brunt of that.  Pre-withdrawal me would have fixed it immediately, but I just couldn't mentally or physically do it.  The piles grew and the mess of me throwing things anywhere became worse and worse.  Finally, I felt like I got to a point where I could handle it.  I am proud to say I cleaned out my closet!  This used to be nothing to me!  However, it was something that became monumental.  My therapist encouraged me, we made a plan and I set into action.  Seems silly, but this was BIG to me.  This told me I was healing.

Still though, I feel like some parts of me haven't turned back on yet.  For the most part, I am enjoying my days again.  I love to break out in dance too to get me out of ruts!  The weather by me is nicer so I try to get out and walk.  I truly laugh and engage with people.  Those are huge wins for me.  However, I feel parts of me are still off and it upsets me at times.  

Next month will mark 6 months off Luvox.  I have come a long way in those 6 months.  I keep reminding myself of that.  This website saved my life.

[Greatful]

@HopingNWaiting How are you doing?

[HopingNWaiting]

@Greatful

Hi there!  How are things with you?

Next week marks roughly 6 months off Luvox for me.  Overall, I am do really well.  Much better thanks to this site and everyone who contributes.

I'm sticking to a much healthier diet with fun stuff thrown in from time to time.  No caffeine or alcohol though.  Not sure when I would be able to reintroduce that as I don't want to risk my progress.

Magnesium has been such a game changer for me.  I can't stress that enough!  It has done wonders for my intrusive thoughts, sleep and PMDD.

I had some issues with Niacinamide and a Turmeric supplement so I stopped taking them.  The Niacinamide was making me wake early morning with the sweats.  The Turmeric was throwing me back into the darkness of withdrawals.  Thankfully, I was able to identify what was happening and get back on track.  Sticking with Magnesium, Fish Oil and Vitamin E for now.

 

I used to run a bit and I LOVED walking.  I could barely function in the height of my withdrawals, but I am proud to say my walking is coming back!  The other week I went for an hour walk and was BEAMING.  I couldn't believe the progress I had made.  

I go on Reddit a lot and try to "help" people who are struggling.  So many do not know about withdrawals or have no one to turn to.  I'm fighting to get well for myself, but I also want to get stronger so I can spread more awareness.  None of this is right.  People have a right to know and yet this isn't publicly out there enough.

Thanks for checking in with me!

[DazzlingCold]

On 4/4/2022 at 7:41 PM, HopingNWaiting said:

@Greatful

Hi there!  How are things with you?

Next week marks roughly 6 months off Luvox for me.  Overall, I am do really well.  Much better thanks to this site and everyone who contributes.

I'm sticking to a much healthier diet with fun stuff thrown in from time to time.  No caffeine or alcohol though.  Not sure when I would be able to reintroduce that as I don't want to risk my progress.

Magnesium has been such a game changer for me.  I can't stress that enough!  It has done wonders for my intrusive thoughts, sleep and PMDD.

I had some issues with Niacinamide and a Turmeric supplement so I stopped taking them.  The Niacinamide was making me wake early morning with the sweats.  The Turmeric was throwing me back into the darkness of withdrawals.  Thankfully, I was able to identify what was happening and get back on track.  Sticking with Magnesium, Fish Oil and Vitamin E for now.

 

I used to run a bit and I LOVED walking.  I could barely function in the height of my withdrawals, but I am proud to say my walking is coming back!  The other week I went for an hour walk and was BEAMING.  I couldn't believe the progress I had made.  

I go on Reddit a lot and try to "help" people who are struggling.  So many do not know about withdrawals or have no one to turn to.  I'm fighting to get well for myself, but I also want to get stronger so I can spread more awareness.  None of this is right.  People have a right to know and yet this isn't publicly out there enough.

Thanks for checking in with me!

Thank you for the update! Im sure all of us starting this journey appreciate to hear how the ones at the “end of it” are doing.

[HopingNWaiting]

This month marks one year since I trusted my doctor to taper me properly.

It feels surreal to write this, but I am doing extremely well considering what happened.  You can get your life back. 

 

Unbeknownst to me, while he was tapering me quickly, I was experiencing withdrawals.  At the time, everything seemed manageable and I thought it would be over when I was completely off the medication.  How naïve I was.  A month to two after stopping, I went into horrific withdrawals.  It really felt like my life was ending and that I would never be OK again.

Through the support of this website and my family/friends, I can safely say there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  I can tell I am still healing, but I was able to reclaim my life around March/April.   The information on this page is PRICELESS!  

 

I'm still completely traumatized by what happened to me.  I am still working on some side effects.  I am OK though.  I am enjoying life again.  I survived the worst of this.

I'm mostly on Reddit now trying to help people who are in withdrawals or wanting to come off their medication.  I try to offer some advice and guidance when I can.  Mostly, I warn people as there is so much misinformation out there.  It scares me.  No one should have to experience this.

As I continue to heal, I hope one day to help others more.  Right now, I do what I can.

Thank you to this site though.  I would not be where I am without it.

 

[ChessieCat]

Hi and thanks for coming back to give an update. 

 

Q:  What symptoms have improved and what symptoms do you still have?  Have the ones that you still have reduced?  How is your sleep?

 

I don't know if you know this, but SA's mission is not only to help people get off their psychiatric drugs but also to educate the medical community:

 

On 5/15/2011 at 5:22 AM, Altostrata said:

This site is also a research project. The personal stories on this site are documentation of an iatrogenic condition -- suffering caused by medical treatment -- that is almost always ignored, misdiagnosed, or denied by the medical establishment. Given the widespread prescription of antidepressants to tens of millions of people worldwide, withdrawal syndrome probably affects hundreds of thousands if not millions -- including newborns and children.

Antidepressant withdrawal syndrome can last weeks, months, or years. It can be distressing, debilitating, or even disabling. It may be adding to an increase in what is termed disabling mental illness.

With our documentation of antidepressant withdrawal syndrome, we hope to educate the medical establishment about this problem. Case studies are essential; they are evidence understood by doctors, the psychiatric industry, and government regulatory agencies. The have already informed numerous articles in major publications and scientific papers.

Our hope is, eventually, antidepressants and other psychiatric drugs will be prescribed rarely, and only in cases of extremely severe mental illness after less invasive treatments have been tried.

Please join Surviving Antidepressants in its mission to support, document, and educate about psychiatric drug withdrawal syndrome.

 

 

 

[HopingNWaiting]

To answer ChessieCat's question:

Q:  What symptoms have improved and what symptoms do you still have?  Have the ones that you still have reduced?  How is your sleep?

 

Uncontrollable weeping spells - gone

 

I have OCD and my intrusive thoughts felt like there were SCREAMING in my head on a constant loop - they are essentially gone

Was having difficulty laughing or feeling happiness - that is all back.

Let me also state that Magnesium had a MASSIVE POSITIVE impact on me in so many regards.  When I started to slowly introduce it, I noticed the most improvement in the following symptoms:

Sleep - I was having much difficulty when I was in the height of my withdrawals. Now, I am pretty much back to normal.  I can even nap during the day again! My sleep isn't totally back to where it used to be, but it has MUCH improved.  I sleep 7-8 hour stretches.

PMDD - I started to experience this in withdrawals and had NO history of this prior.  The best way for me to describe was that I became The Exorcist during my menstrual cycle.  I no longer experience this.  It was terrifying and I am so glad it is gone.

What I do still struggle with are slight memory issues as well as sometimes finding the right words.  I feel like I am not as quick or sharp as I used to be?  My plan is to download some apps to see if that will help.  Maybe do crossword puzzles again.  I may also download Duolingo and try to learn Italian.  Anything to keep my brain going.  I will say I read books like crazy!  They are easy reads though.

Still trying to learn to deal with the trauma - the guilt - the sadness - the anger.  

 

ETA: I felt so lost for a while there and am still dealing with depersonalization a bit.  it's like I don't know what I like anymore?  I am learning who I am again and it can be intimidating at times.  
 

[addielady01]

On 8/14/2022 at 11:42 AM, HopingNWaiting said:

I have OCD and my intrusive thoughts felt like there were SCREAMING in my head on a constant loop - they are essentially gone

How long did it take for your intrusive thoughts to improve? Did you do anything special to deal with them or did they just fade on their own? I have OCD and my short time on Sertraline has worsened my OCD. I pray that when I'm as far out as your are they will have quieted. 

[HopingNWaiting]

9 hours ago, addielady01 said:

How long did it take for your intrusive thoughts to improve? Did you do anything special to deal with them or did they just fade on their own? I have OCD and my short time on Sertraline has worsened my OCD. I pray that when I'm as far out as your are they will have quieted. 

Hi addielady01,

I estimate it took 5-6 months to lower the volume as well as stop the constant cycle on my intrusive thoughts.  This is something I still deal with, but there are no where near the intensity that withdrawals took them.  That was unbearable.  My mind was screaming at me constantly.

Some thing that helped me?  Therapy, yoga, meditation and journaling.  Healthier/improved diet is HUGE (was already gluten free)!  Gave up caffeine and alcohol for a long time as well. I am also a firm believer in Magnesium.  

What have you tried?

[addielady01]

Thank you so much for replying. Do you have a specific brand of Magnesium you like? I've been taking fish oil, and I can tell a difference with it. I felt like I was in a constant state of fight or flight, and the fish oil took care of that. I take GNC Triple Strength Mini. My intrusive thoughts were loud and constant the first couple months off...almost unbearable at times.  I'm 4 months off of a really bad experience with Sertraline. They have eased up some,  but I'm still not quite my old self. I have hope it will continue to improve.  I've also dealt with PMDD this year, which is what led me trying the Sertraline. I switched to decaf coffee for a while and now I'm completely off.  I drink water, and try to eat clean most of the time. I tried 1 alcoholic beverage and it set me back, so I won't be doing that again. I've been exercising, and try to keep myself distracted as best I can.  

[DazzlingCold]

On 8/14/2022 at 10:42 AM, HopingNWaiting said:

To answer ChessieCat's question:

Q:  What symptoms have improved and what symptoms do you still have?  Have the ones that you still have reduced?  How is your sleep?

 

Uncontrollable weeping spells - gone

 

I have OCD and my intrusive thoughts felt like there were SCREAMING in my head on a constant loop - they are essentially gone

Was having difficulty laughing or feeling happiness - that is all back.

Let me also state that Magnesium had a MASSIVE POSITIVE impact on me in so many regards.  When I started to slowly introduce it, I noticed the most improvement in the following symptoms:

Sleep - I was having much difficulty when I was in the height of my withdrawals. Now, I am pretty much back to normal.  I can even nap during the day again! My sleep isn't totally back to where it used to be, but it has MUCH improved.  I sleep 7-8 hour stretches.

PMDD - I started to experience this in withdrawals and had NO history of this prior.  The best way for me to describe was that I became The Exorcist during my menstrual cycle.  I no longer experience this.  It was terrifying and I am so glad it is gone.

What I do still struggle with are slight memory issues as well as sometimes finding the right words.  I feel like I am not as quick or sharp as I used to be?  My plan is to download some apps to see if that will help.  Maybe do crossword puzzles again.  I may also download Duolingo and try to learn Italian.  Anything to keep my brain going.  I will say I read books like crazy!  They are easy reads though.

Still trying to learn to deal with the trauma - the guilt - the sadness - the anger.  

 

ETA: I felt so lost for a while there and am still dealing with depersonalization a bit.  it's like I don't know what I like anymore?  I am learning who I am again and it can be intimidating at times.  
 

Thank you for sharing! I am glad to hear about your recovery. It certainly brings hope every time I read these stories. Hope the remainder of symptoms keep getting better. Sounds like you are being proactive about helping yourself. 
 

[HopingNWaiting]

On 8/17/2022 at 12:05 AM, addielady01 said:

Thank you so much for replying. Do you have a specific brand of Magnesium you like? I've been taking fish oil, and I can tell a difference with it. I felt like I was in a constant state of fight or flight, and the fish oil took care of that. I take GNC Triple Strength Mini. My intrusive thoughts were loud and constant the first couple months off...almost unbearable at times.  I'm 4 months off of a really bad experience with Sertraline. They have eased up some,  but I'm still not quite my old self. I have hope it will continue to improve.  I've also dealt with PMDD this year, which is what led me trying the Sertraline. I switched to decaf coffee for a while and now I'm completely off.  I drink water, and try to eat clean most of the time. I tried 1 alcoholic beverage and it set me back, so I won't be doing that again. I've been exercising, and try to keep myself distracted as best I can.  

Sounds like you are making a lot of positive changes!

I take - Doctor's Best High Absorption Magnesium Glycinate Lysinate, 100% Chelated, Non-GMO, Vegan, Gluten & Soy Free, 100 mg

Very easy on my stomach.  I take 4x a day.

I wish you well on your journey.

[addielady01]

On 8/29/2022 at 4:35 PM, HopingNWaiting said:

Sounds like you are making a lot of positive changes!

I take - Doctor's Best High Absorption Magnesium Glycinate Lysinate, 100% Chelated, Non-GMO, Vegan, Gluten & Soy Free, 100 mg

Very easy on my stomach.  I take 4x a day.

I wish you well on your journey.

 

Just saw your response. Thank you so much for sharing. I definitely may look into taking it.