Fuerza: has anyone experienced DR/DP caused by Effexor?

[fuerza]

Went to psychiatrist today and told him about horrible PMS. I feel like crap a week before and the week during my period. He suggested I try Vitex which is a natural supplement. I searched the SA forums and found that some people got better when taking it, but apparently it also affects the dopaminergic system, so right now I'm really on the fence about taking it.

[AliG]

Fuerza. You might want to start an introduction topic in the Benzo forum. I think it will be helpful for you.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/forum/29-members-only-benzo-forum/

[fuerza]

Hey AliG! I started a topic and got some feedback from Wellness. I think I will try to taper Valdoxan and Oxazepam intermittently until I reach 10mg Oxazepam. From there on I will only taper Valdoxan and will go off Oxazepam when I'm finished with the Valdoxan taper.

 

Also, I still haven't taken the Vitex capsules, but I'm seriously considering taking them as PMS makes the emotional symptoms unbearable.

[fuerza]

Ugh, the terrible wave is back. Felt good yesterday afternoon and then the dread started to set in. Derealisation hit just before going to bed and my heart has been pounding all day today.

[scallywag]

Hold on, fuerza. This wave will pass.

[fuerza]

Thanks for the kind words.

[fuerza]

Just when I thought that this wouldn't get worse, it did. Got about 3 hours of sleep tonight, woke up with night terrors and spent the whole night hyperventilating and crying. The last time this happened was when I started taking the meds. Didn't get any sleep for a week and then my mum took me to the hospital and I was prescribed Oxazepam.

 

I wonder if it's wise to up my Oxazepam dose a bit if this goes on or to ask for a sleeping med prescription because I'm completely non-functional without sleep. 

[fuerza]

Slept better today. I'm experiencing a new symptom. There's some tingling in my fingertips as if my hands haven't 'woken up' fully.

[fuerza]

I'm gonna switch to Valdoxan solution. I don't really trust the scale anymore and don't want to traumatise my CNS with fluctuating doses.

[fuerza]

And the night terrors are back. Desperately waiting to hear from my pdoc if I have a chance to get admitted without taking any new drugs. The only thoughts right now seem to be either about existential terror or death.

[ChessieCat]

I'm gonna switch to Valdoxan solution. I don't really trust the scale anymore and don't want to traumatise my CNS with fluctuating doses.

 

Have you made the switch to solution?  If so, have the night terrors returned since the switch?

 

You might find these topics helpful:

 

What should I expect from my doctor about withdrawal symptoms?

How do you talk to a doctor about tapering and withdrawal?

[fuerza]

Yep, I made the switch. Before that I actually made a 4% reduction and felt a teensy bit better. I wondering if it may be the buildup of Valdoxan that's causing the akathisia and suicidal ideation.

 

My doctor acknowledges my wish to come off drugs and he has also said that he's seen patients with withdrawal symptoms before.

[fuerza]

Okay, my doctor wants to put me on propranolol. Nope-nope-nope. 

 

However, I'm really considering lowering my dose of Valdoxan a teensy bit because it seems that the akathisia is worse right after I take it in the evening.

[fuerza]

Made a 10% Valdoxan cut on Tuesday. Feeling the effects since yesterday. Sleep is disturbed and I feel restless all the time.

[fuerza]

Went to a yoga class yesterday. I used to be physically active and fit before all this happened and I was horrified at how weak my muscles have become. There was hardly anything that I would consider physically straining. However, I felt like I completed a 2-hour spin class. Even when I started with exercise from zero 7 years ago, it wasn't so gruesome.

 

I felt good in the evening and fell asleep a lot quicker than usual. However, as I feared, I feel restless and uneasy now. I woke up at 6 am after having nightmares about being stuck in 'hidden realities' and had all sorts of crazy frightening thoughts. Fell asleep again, but woke up at 10 am which is early for me.

 

I don't know what to do about next. I have to move myself or the last of my muscles will vanish, but I don't want to upset my CNS. The good thing about yoga is that my pulse doesn't go up much and I don't feel like I'm having a panic attack while exercising. Has anyone had experience with these kinds of reactions to exercise? Did you continue exercising?

[fuerza]

No more Kundalini for me. I felt the deepest, almost psychotic, terror last night. I calmed myself down a bit and tried to go to sleep, but I then it went on and on. I couldn't think about anything without it turning into something twisted. Fell asleep at 3AM and woke up at 7 or 8 AM in absolute terror and hot flashes. Managed to fall alseep again and woke up at 11. Still shaking with panic and terrifying thoughts, which even don't make any sense. I seriously feel like I'm on the brink of losing my sanity.

[KarenB]

I use yoga in order to get some gentle exercise.  It didn't take me long to discover I couldn't do anywhere near what I used to be able to do.  Eventually I started doing  Gentle/Restorative yoga.  It gives me good stretches, makes me feel like I'm moving some muscles, and gets me feeling quite peaceful.  Done properly, with all the props (blankets, blocks or bolsters) it doesn't wear me out or activate my w/d symptoms.  If you google it, you'll probably find some lessons you can watch. 

 

Have things settled any in the days since your last post? 

[fuerza]

I use yoga in order to get some gentle exercise.  It didn't take me long to discover I couldn't do anywhere near what I used to be able to do.  Eventually I started doing  Gentle/Restorative yoga.  It gives me good stretches, makes me feel like I'm moving some muscles, and gets me feeling quite peaceful.  Done properly, with all the props (blankets, blocks or bolsters) it doesn't wear me out or activate my w/d symptoms.  If you google it, you'll probably find some lessons you can watch. 

 

Have things settled any in the days since your last post? 

Hey KB! I might stick to very gentle yoga too. I've slowly recovered. Still get some DR, but nearly not as bad as last week. Sleep could be better, which is a shame because I was looking forward to reducing my AD. I'll probably wait a bit more 'til I've fully stabilised.

[KarenB]

Good idea to hold off reducing till you feel a bit more settled.  That really is the key to getting to 0.

[fuerza]

And the night terrors are back. Sleep used to be my safe time when I could catch a break from the nagging fear. My friend told me about calming damiana tea, but I'm not sure if I should try right now. I'm really at my wits end. No distraction seems to help.

[KarenB]

Not an easy thing to deal with, night terrors.  Some things I've done over the years include having soothing music ready to play, or even leave it on softly all night; using a night-light but out in the hall so it's not too bright; allowing myself to sit up and read for a while; having a wander to the kitchen or somewhere to break out of the feelings left by the dreams; putting my feet in cold water when I wake up.

 

I didn't ever find a supplement that helped reduce the terrors, but that doesn't mean that your or others won't. 

[JanCarol]

Hey Fuerza - just checking in - I see you are working on the benzo thread.  I asked there for a signature update.

 

What date did you change to liquid Valdoxan?  Could it be that your current upset is from that change - and that change might have been too close to your bridging to valium?

 

I'd also like you to consider that perhaps it wasn't the Effexor that was the primary cause of your DP/DR, but Lexapro withdrawals.  You started the Effexor, just as the Lexapro withdrawals would have been kicking in.

 

Let us know how you are going, and I hope you see the sun today!

[fuerza]

Hey JC! For some reason, I didn't get the notification for the benzo thread. I'll update my signature when I have time. I'm currently up to my ears with work duties. I changed to liquid Valdoxan in November. One thing that messed with my CNS was New Years time. I didn't get enough sleep. Shortly after I went to a Kundalini yoga class which made me go completely berserk for some reason.

 

I have also considered that the DP/DR was caused either by Lexapro or Oxazepam withdrawals. I know I had an anxiety attack shortly before the DR episode. I do know that the Effexor changed something for the worse. When I felt good, I was very unempathetic and careless. When I felt bad, I felt a strong sense of doom. It didn't resemble the negative emotions I'd experienced prior to taking ADs. More just like an emotional and spiritual void.

 

Right now I've swapped the evening dose of 5mg Oxazepam for 2,5mg Diazepam. It seems that the Diazepam is causing a loss of libido, which I've not experienced before. However, I do feel calmer overall.

 

I'm trying to stay positive and make plans for the future. I may have an opportunity to learn another language and travel to Cuba this year. I'm also planning to take loan to buy my own apartment. Basically, I still have very bad days and times when I really don't feel a thing, but I'm trying to make choices that take me forward. I feel like not doing anything will only make the doomsy feelings worse. I decided that the healing time is also an opportunity for me to figure out what to do with my life and find out what really makes me happy.

[marx]

Hey, fuerza, it's comforting to meet people who are also going through "symptomless" valdoxan withdrawal hell! Reading ecstatic testimonials by other valdoxan users makes me think I must be crazy to be experiencing this.

You haven't been updating your thread, how are you feeling right now?

[fuerza]

4 minutes ago, marx said:

Hey, fuerza, it's comforting to meet people who are also going through "symptomless" valdoxan withdrawal hell! Reading ecstatic testimonials by other valdoxan users makes me think I must be crazy to be experiencing this.

You haven't been updating your thread, how are you feeling right now?

 

Hey Marx! The Valdoxan taper is not completely symptomless, but it's not complete torture like other drugs. 

 

Right now I'm focused on getting off Diazepam and it's hard. I'm tapering 5% twice a month, but I'm considering a longer hold this time. I'm a bit freaked out about the fact that it'll take me years to get off benzos. Sometimes I think that if my first psychiatrist had been a more knowledgable person, I would have been off ADs straight away and would not have been prescribed benzos for the extreme anxiety that the ADs were causing.

 

I'm functional, but I constantly have this cloud over me that tells me that this is going to last forever. I try to be positive, focus on my hobbies and try to find new ways to be happy, but the restrictiveness of the withdrawal is wearing me down. Sorry, I have better days too, but today is not one of them. 

 

For encouragement, I've gotten better over time. I think my last panic attack was in November. I rarely cry for no reason anymore. I'm not petrified with anxiety in social situations. I just feel that I need to find something that won't let me sink into a very destructive nihilistic mindset.

[marx]

I was wondering, how do you taper valdoxan tablets? Do you make liquid out of them? Is it soluble in water or what?

Seems you are the only one with the experience tapering it in this forum so far.

[fuerza]

4 hours ago, marx said:

I was wondering, how do you taper valdoxan tablets? Do you make liquid out of them? Is it soluble in water or what?

Seems you are the only one with the experience tapering it in this forum so far.

 

Hey Marx! I make a liquid and measure it out with a syringe. Basically 25mg tablet + 25ml of water. I use hot water, break the pill into little pieces, stir and it's ready in about 5 minutes. There's still a bit residue, but I think it's from the fillers. I've been successful with a liquid taper so far.

[fuerza]

Just wanted to add something to my last post. I'm quite worried that my syringes aren't accurate. I've been using a 5ml syringe lately and I just bought a 20ml one. I measured 5ml on the 20ml syringe and then drew the liquid into the 5ml syringe. To my surprise, the 5ml syringe had about 5.5ml of liquid in it. What gives?

[marx]

I don't have much experience with syringes, but could it be you're measuring at the top of the plunger?

 

12 hours ago, fuerza said:

Just wanted to add something to my last post. I'm quite worried that my syringes aren't accurate. I've been using a 5ml syringe lately and I just bought a 20ml one. I measured 5ml on the 20ml syringe and then drew the liquid into the 5ml syringe. To my surprise, the 5ml syringe had about 5.5ml of liquid in it. What gives?

 

[fuerza]

Just now, marx said:

I don't have much experience with syringes, but could it be you're measuring at the top of the plunger?

 

 

 

I only use a syringe with a plunger to measure diazepam and I always pay attention to measure at the right place. My bigger syringes don't have plungers. I figured the difference may come from the size difference. The openings of the syringes are different sizes and I don't think the opening part of the syringe counts to the dose, if that makes any sense. Both bigger syringes are made by the same manufacturer, so I don't really know what else could be causing the difference.

[fuerza]

I'm in a terrible wave again. I reduced Valdoxan on the 1st of January and the symptoms kicked in on the 9th, I think. I felt panicky in the evening and had night terrors. Since then, I've tried melatonin and it has worked, but I'm feeling very depressed (suicidal) and I'm extremely anxious again. I don't know what to do anymore. Without melatonin I was panicky before falling asleep and woke up several times during the night + felt really crappy in the morning (lack of sleep). With melatonin I sometimes fall asleep right away and sometimes experience panic before sleeping. I sleep a straight 7 hours and wake up depressed.

 

Should I reinstate or wait this out?

[fuerza]

I'm in a terrible wave again. I started reducing small amounts of diazepam in March and I felt good after my cuts. However, a week and a half ago (2nd or 3rd of May) I was hit with a wall of panic. I can only describe it as pure terror. Today it has escalated to the point where just writhe around in my bed in sheer terror. Very similar to November 2016. I try to fall asleep and see the most disturbing dreams while being half-awake.

 

From my sig, I've figured out that benzo cuts might be causing the aka and night terrors. What I don't get is that I could cut my dose last summer without any big problems. I think I got a bit triggered by the lack of success stories here. I'm also on BB and people seem to be healing a lot more on there. On the other hand, I don't even visit SA boards when I'm feeling a tiny bit better. I'm really hoping the majority of other people are the same.

 

I don't even know what the point of this post is. Maybe do document that I'm in a wave, set out dates, really tell myself that I was feeling better before etc.

 

I wish that someone could weigh in on tapering benzos after ADs. Does it rev up your previous AD w/d symptoms? I try to find Effexor (XR) recovery stories, but it's just so disheartening to read that people don't consider their stories 'successes' but just surviving and getting on with life.

[Gussy]

Have you read my recent effexor post? Might be what you're looking for.

[fuerza]

40 minutes ago, Gussy said:

Have you read my recent effexor post? Might be what you're looking for.

 

The faster the taper the longer the suffering?

[Gussy]

It seems that way from people i.ve exchanged with. I think i.m a lucky exception though. Did you read my most recent post about my recovery? Could give you some strength to keep finding a way?

[fuerza]

1 hour ago, Gussy said:

It seems that way from people i.ve exchanged with. I think i.m a lucky exception though. Did you read my most recent post about my recovery? Could give you some strength to keep finding a way?

 

Thank you! I'm gonna read it when I'm not on edge. I've decided to take a short break from SA and BB, because I'm just making myself more anxious.