Tom37: Lexapro taper

[getofflex]

Like I said before, we need for you to update your signature.  You say 

"Hit severe symptoms (started 7th Nov) after dropping to 3mg. Dropped to 3mg approx 22nd October.

Back to 4mg (7th November) and stabilising. Current symptoms started 23rd November "  

 

We need to know what year you did these things.  

[Tom37]

Have updated.

 

I understand it’s another wave I’m in and it should pass. I just like to post when I’m struggling and sometimes like some reassurance it is a wave, it’s temporary and will feel good again.

[getofflex]

From what you described above, I can tell that your nervous system is recovering. It’s great news that the waves are farther and farther apart. Please rest assured that eventually this will all get better. 
 

have you read any of the success stories on the forum? They are on the homepage.  

Edited November 4, 2023 by getofflex

[Tom37]

Hi @getofflex

 

Yes I have read a lot of them.

 

Yes waves have been a lot further apart and baseline has significantly improved since this started.

 

Trying to battle through current wave and it’s tough going. Just feel so unwell that it was impossible to sleep last night.

 

Feeling a lot worse than yesterday so hopefully at its peak. Have next two weeks off work.

 

Do you believe healing happens with all waves no matter what’s caused them?

 

 

[Tom37]

Hello,

 

The horrible symptom that made me pace and not be able to lay down let alone sleep eased last night and got 6 hours sleep.

 

Still in the wave but seems to have past it’s peak….fingers crossed anyway, but we shall see.

[Tom37]

Had another 6 hours of good sleep so that is nice.

 

The peak of wave has passed but still feeling worse that before it started so I’m guessing I’m still in it. 

 

I just hope I don’t get stuck where I’m at for weeks or months and I always fear that now will be my new normal for a while. 
 

Will I get back to feeling really good again? Who knows.

[Tom37]

Hello,

 

Had another decent sleep as got 5 hours and back for another hour or so.

 

Still in this wave. 
It”s definitely passed it’s peak but now I seem stuck.

Able to be up and function and do what needs doing but still taking it easy.

 

Wondering if I have actually been feeling good or just been kidding myself and tolerating things better.

 

Feels like it will be a while anyway before things improve.

 

[Tom37]

Still in this wave or is it now the start of a few months of going backwards? Time will tell.

 

Im able to function and do what is needed and definitely better than the weekend but also definitely worse than before it started.

 

Still sleeping ok for me, 5 or 6 hours a night.

[getofflex]

I'm sorry to hear that you are still in the wave, Tom.  Have you tried some non drug coping skills?  I don't know if you've seen this yet, so I'll post it here.  

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

Have you tried magnesium and omega-3?  It is suggested to add one at a time, and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

Have you had any alcohol, other mind altering substances, intense exercise, weather changes, dietary changes, travel, extra stress, etc?  

[Tom37]

Thanks @getofflex

 

I have quite a few different non drug tools I use. I know at some point I will feel better it’s just very frustrating.

 

No alcohol, no major stresses. Haven’t exercised since wave started. It’s only been 7 days since it properly started so just a wave doing what a wave does I guess.

 

I like to journal so when things do get hard I can see that I’ve got through it many times before and to track overall progress.

 

Waves are cruel as you tend to forget ever feeling good, doubt the progress you have made and can’t imagine it ending. You think life is finally moving forward and then a wave comes and sucks it all out of you again. Leaves you questioning if you will ever have a future outside wd.

[getofflex]

12 hours ago, Tom37 said:

Waves are cruel as you tend to forget ever feeling good, doubt the progress you have made and can’t imagine it ending. You think life is finally moving forward and then a wave comes and sucks it all out of you again. Leaves you questioning if you will ever have a future outside wd.

Yes, I agree!  I've felt the same way when hit with a wave.  It helps to say to myself "This too shall pass". 

[Tom37]

Hello,

 

Had a rough night and hardly any sleep. Symptoms kicked in again so wasn’t feeling at all good. Was still able to lie in bed ok so that horrible restlessness wasn’t there.

 

Feeling pretty average today so just doing what needs to be done at home. Went for a 40 min walk by the ocean to get out of the house.

 

This getting quite long for me on the wave duration so hopefully it ends soon.

Think the big one I had in late April was about 14 days.

 

I do think once I get past this wave there will be an increase in how I feel.

[Tom37]

Wave still going…day 9 I think…..managed to get 5 or so hours sleep so that helps but still feeling the same.

 

So hard to remember feeling good so being looking back at photos of what I have done in this year….hiking, skiing etc. Works for a bit but then back to thinking this wave is going to last along time, is it a permanent setback etc.

 

 

[getofflex]

This topic is very helpful: 

 

Techniques for Managing Withdrawal

[Tom37]

That’s @getofflexfor the link.

Have not seen that one before.

[RachelSusan]

@Tom37 Hi, it's been a few years since I have written on your page. I'm sorry to read that you are in a wave.  Is this wave from a recent cut in medication or is just out of nowhere?  I know the agony a wave can be.  It seems like we would get used to them but for me I think I get more upset by them the longer they keep coming. I think we just burn out. I hope that you get out of it soon. 

[Tom37]

Hi @RachelSusan

 

I haven’t reduced or done anything.

I had been doing quite well and wasn’t really thinking much about withdrawal and was living an almost normal life. I didn’t feel a hundred percent all the time  so I knew more healing needed to happen which I guess means more waves. 

 

Only my third wave this year so had long periods without them but I think because of that it makes it harder when you sink into one. Plus you start having plans for the future etc and then a wave hits and everything goes on hold. The difference between windows and waves is significant so really hits you.

 

The only thing that may have triggered it is increased physical exercise. Started skiing this winter and the 2 times i pushed it I’ve had waves start ten days later. Otherwise it was just time for a wave🤷🏻‍♂️.

 

But as you know I can’t remember feeling good, can’t imagine it’s going to end and all those type of thoughts that make it difficult. 
 

The part that scares me the most is not knowing how long it will last for or if it’s a permanent setback.

 

I hope your doing well.

 

 

[Tom37]

Still in this wave. Day ten or eleven and just feeling like I have been.

 

Had a good sleep last night of over 6 hours.

 

Trying to remain positive that it’s just a wave and will end.

[getofflex]

1 hour ago, Tom37 said:

The only thing that may have triggered it is increased physical exercise. Started skiing this winter and the 2 times i pushed it I’ve had waves start ten days later. Otherwise it was just time for a wave🤷🏻‍♂️.

Intense exercise, or exercise that is more intense than we are used to, can definitely cause an uptick in symptoms.  It does for me, and lots of other people.  

[Tom37]

Thanks @getofflex

 

Its quite hard to know what your nervous system can handle especially after doing so well.
 

I read on a thread on here it should settle down in a 2/3 weeks with worse case a few months.

I hope that is correct.

[RachelSusan]

@Tom37 The waves that come out of the blue are the worst.  If we taper and get a wave I don't think it is as bad because we can at least tie it to something specific.  These random waves are, at least for me, a little more jarring because they are unexpected.  And I too have found that exercising, and even stress or just general fatigue can bring about a wave for me. Luckily they have always resolved rather quickly. I hope your present waves clears up quickly as well.

[Tom37]

Still in this wave day 12 and trying to ride it the best I can. Slept terribly last night and not sure why as wasn’t feeling too bad. Mind was all over the place thinking about weird things that I normally never would. Did finally manage an hour or two this morning.

 

Definitely feel this is staying around for quite a while as no sign of it letting up.

 

Got a bit more upset than normal in the night too about this whole situation and it being never ending.

[getofflex]

24 minutes ago, Tom37 said:

Got a bit more upset than normal in the night too about this whole situation and it being never ending

It feels as though it will never end, but it will end.  Keep telling yourself "this too shall pass".  Try to go easy on yourself, do anything that will calm your nervous system.  The best thing is to distract yourself, so you don't keep thinking about how bad this is.  Gentle walks outside were very helpful to me in my waves, calming relaxing music, arts and crafts (think adult coloring books even), even doing gentle house and yard work, can help to distract.  Go back and reread the link I gave you Saturday.  Sending positive thoughts your way, Tom.  I'm sorry you are dealing with this. 

Edited November 13, 2023 by getofflex

[Tom37]

Thanks @getofflex I really appreciate your support.

 

I always get up and do what needs to be done at home and get out for a walk and a drive to help get through the day. I have always struggled to watch tv or go online when in a wave. Can’t seem to concentrate enough.

 

I always use the this to shall pass saying. Just sometimes it’s hard to believe.

[gentlehermione]

Hi @Tom37

 

“This too shall pass“ has given me hope in the darkest moments 😉

 

Walking my dogs and gardening have helped me immensely over the past six years. I think it‘s the combination of gentle exercise with distraction that proves to be beneficial.

 

Hope you‘ll pull out of this wave soon.

[getofflex]

20 hours ago, Tom37 said:

Can’t seem to concentrate enough.

Just a very simple repetitive physical activity can help to distract, and somehow seems to soothe the nervous system a bit.  

[Tom37]

Seem to be feeling quite a bit better today.

 

The main symptom I was having seems to be on the way out. Still there at times but lesser in intensity and sometimes it feels like it’s releasing itself. No new symptoms have replaced it so far.

 

Actually had a proper appetite this morning which is a good sign.

 

Even though feeling better still taking things easy.

 

Hopefully it means wave is crashing but time will tell.

[Tom37]

Thanks @gentlehermione

 

Still feeling the same today as I was yesterday. Would say feeling over 60 percent better than I was but still not back to where I was.
 

Am I still in the wave or is this my new normal? That’s the frustrating part that does my head in. 
 

Did get 6 or 7 hours sleep which is a positive. 
 

This wave has definitely shattered my confidence as to where I’m at in this process. 

[getofflex]

I suspect you are probably gradually coming out of the wave.  

[gentlehermione]

22 hours ago, Tom37 said:

This wave has definitely shattered my confidence as to where I’m at in this process. 

@Tom37

 

I understand. My wave has been ongoing for the past five weeks and I‘m beginning to wonder when it will end!

 

Hope you’ll be feeling better soon 🙂

[Tom37]

Thanks @gentlehermione and @getofflex.

 

Had another good nights sleep so that is a positive.

 

Still feeling basically the same as yesterday so still in this wave and while it’s been easing still the same symptoms they just wax and wane throughout the day. 
 

Im back at work on Monday and at least I will be able to work and while may not be feeling great should be ok.

 

Hopefully things will improve and Im sure they will but just no idea when.

[Carmie]

Hi @Tom37 , it’s good to hear that you’re slowly coming out of your wave. This windows and waves thing is quite a roller coaster ride, isn’t it? 
 

So good to hear you slept well. All the best with your return to work on Monday🧡

[Tom37]

So I’m still in this wave but it seems to have eased a bit but still there….or is this now my wd normal which if it is means I’ve gone backwards….either way I’m still not feeling like I was.

 

Im sleeping fine and able to work and function normally but still don’t feel like doing much else.

 

One improvement I have noticed since it started is I use to always be hot in bed and as I have been like that for 5 years just thought it was me but I’ve been feeling a lot different. Even with air con on I’d still get hot but not anymore. So feeling more comfortable in bed.

[RachelSusan]

@Tom37 Hi Tom, I was wondering how you were doing.  Thank you for the update. It's good you aren't having any problems with sleeping.  As for the rest of it, it can take a long time to get out of a wave.  Don't give up, you are indeed going in the right direction.

[Tom37]

Thanks @RachelSusan

 

Sleeping seems to be at my normal which is good. 
 

I’ve certainly had worse waves so I’m grateful to be functioning ok and doing what I need too. It’s just frustrating that it is dragging on like it is, but I guess it means my brain/cns is still needing to repair things so something I have to endure, and I’m sure I’ll be feeling a lot better once this one is done.

[gentlehermione]

3 hours ago, Tom37 said:

I’ve certainly had worse waves so I’m grateful to be functioning ok and doing what I need too. It’s just frustrating that it is dragging on like it is, but I guess it means my brain/cns is still needing to repair things so something I have to endure, and I’m sure I’ll be feeling a lot better once this one is done.

@Tom37

 

A good attitude!
 

Withdrawal really does wear us down to the point where it’s sometimes hard to persevere with a positive mind set.

Keep on keeping on!