eboyd: years in the making

[Tweet]

Eboyd, I have been off all supplements, which were many, but magnesium a few times a week for sleep. Like you, I figured if my body was going to heal itself I needed to quit "helping". My doc said after months of 5htp  my levels had been restored and there was no point in taking it constantly. He said if I feel I need it after a few months try going back for 2-3 months. 

I should know in 2-3 days if it is helping.

I took it during my p m s week and it seemed to help.

All this to say, I think you are on the right track in wondering whether it is a good idea to get off all supplements and see where you really are with your healing.

You are hanging in there great and are obviously very health informed and concerned, which is a great strength to have in recovery. 

Prayers going out for you 🙏

 

[Tweet]

BTW I am sleeping 7-8 hours most nights.

Good sleep, REAL sleep (often without supplements) PTL!

I think too many supplements for sleep can mess with healing the brain IMHO.

And I think that real sleep brings our brains a long way

towards healing.

You might try it. 😉

[eboyd]

I just wanted to make a quick update.  I decided to stop taking all supplements and HRT a little over a month ago.  Since I stopped, symptoms have improved immensely and I have only missed 2 days of work the past 4 weeks instead of a week and a half like usual.  I have, however, been doing sound vibration healing sessions which are amazing and very calming.  I get in a very relaxed state.  I have also been practicing meditation and using binaural beats.  I am feeling well enough to return to exercise.  I am making sure I am getting my micros by making a fresh green juice daily.  I also make my own bone broth and drink that daily as well.  I do still enjoy the ice baths.  My libido has dropped off since stopping the testosterone HRT.  I have considered reinstating, but I would rather let my body heal on its own.  I did like the redistribution of fat, but I did not like the acne.  Whether or not it helped or hindered recovery I do not know.  I do not feel horrible anxiety.  My energy is low, however, and the brain fog is always there anyway.  I had low testosterone to begin with.  I don't want to deal with any horrible side effects, though.  And I am no longer having horribly debilitating waves that last 2 weeks.  I was on a number of different supplements so I have no idea which one was causing what.  Some advice would be appreciated.

[Tweet]

11 minutes ago, eboyd said:

I just wanted to make a quick update.  I decided to stop taking all supplements and HRT a little over a month ago.  Since I stopped, symptoms have improved immensely and I have only missed 2 days of work the past 4 weeks instead of a week and a half like usual.  I have, however, been doing sound vibration healing sessions which are amazing and very calming.  I get in a very relaxed state.  I have also been practicing meditation and using binaural beats.  I am feeling well enough to return to exercise.  I am making sure I am getting my micros by making a fresh green juice daily.  I also make my own bone broth and drink that daily as well.  I do still enjoy the ice baths.  My libido has dropped off since stopping the testosterone HRT.  I have considered reinstating, but I would rather let my body heal on its own.  I did like the redistribution of fat, but I did not like the acne.  Whether or not it helped or hindered recovery I do not know.  I do not feel horrible anxiety.  My energy is low, however, and the brain fog is always there anyway.  I had low testosterone to begin with.  I don't want to deal with any horrible side effects, though.  And I am no longer having horribly debilitating waves that last 2 weeks.  I was on a number of different supplements so I have no idea which one was causing what.  Some advice would be appreciated.

Hi eboyd!!!

Nice to hear from you! 

And such good news👏👏👏👏♥️

I think you are wise to let your body take over the healing. Doesn't hope feel wonderful? Congrats on your improvement!😄 

For energy I use plenty of sleep, a bit of coffee, tea, or coke, or just saying no to things that I don't have energy for or pacing myself. If my husband wants to run me around at mealtime I just point out I am feeling low on energy since I no longer have that "wonderful" prozac fake energy. 

He's definitely ok with that lol😉

Libido for  me came back at about 15 months and is still improving with no hormones ever. It helped that my feelings of love for my awesome man have started coming back, as well.

[eboyd]

Hi Tweet.  I fell into a big wave s couple of days ago.  It is a necessary evil which I have come to accept.  I have been trying to work on my relationship with my husband.  I like to think the disconnect is part of the nuero emotions we go through.  On days I feel well I am productive within reason of my capabilities...when I need a break I take it.  Even if it is a nap I need on my lunch break at work.  I did have a stress releasing mental break down on Monday...but I usually have something along those lines happen before I go into a big wave.  The big ones are only everyother month.  I have small ones periodically, but they are manageable.  I am healing, however.  I am just finding ways to be more patient, self compassionate, and loving of my body and my life.  The shift in mindset has been great.

[Tweet]

14 minutes ago, eboyd said:

Hi Tweet.  I fell into a big wave s couple of days ago.  It is a necessary evil which I have come to accept.  I have been trying to work on my relationship with my husband.  I like to think the disconnect is part of the nuero emotions we go through.  On days I feel well I am productive within reason of my capabilities...when I need a break I take it.  Even if it is a nap I need on my lunch break at work.  I did have a stress releasing mental break down on Monday...but I usually have something along those lines happen before I go into a big wave.  The big ones are only everyother month.  I have small ones periodically, but they are manageable.  I am healing, however.  I am just finding ways to be more patient, self compassionate, and loving of my body and my life.  The shift in mindset has been great.

So glad to hear you are still improving. 

Your strength and resolve are very inspiring!

I so agree that a positive, hopeful, patient mindset is so very important, as well as the ability to forgive ourselves when we fall short and succumb to emotional outbursts.

Now I see that for me,  it was my injured brain acting up, and all the will power in the world couldn't have stopped it! Thank God I was able to at least reduce its duration by will power. It is scary to be so out of control in your mind! 

Joyce Meyers Battlefield of the Mind on cd has been huge in my life the last few weeks, as a help in keeping my thinking right during recovery. I know it will also be a big help in ending the anxiety and depression that have followed me all my life.

I could tell from the first time I read your posts that you were a fighter, eboyd, and I know you will succeed at this!

I love that you try to really help yourself by taking care of your body so it can heal as quickly and easily as possible.

I totally agree with you on the issue of feelings towards our husbands being a neuro issue. Unfortunately, emotions can't be conjured up. So frustrating.

But they will be coming back.

And it will be so great to experience!😘

 

[eboyd]

Since winter has officially arrived and my fatigue is getting really bad, I am going to try vit. D again.  I currently take 1000mg 5MTHF and CBD which I have been stable on for awhile now.  I am not sure what supplement I was taking that was causing worse symptoms.  I am going to add in vitamin D recommended by my doctor which is really high at 10000IU.  Not sure if I should take this daily or everyother day?  I get scared to take anything anymore because it may not work out well...which means down time, life goes on hold, and I miss work.

[eboyd]

I have been in a really bad wave for 3 weeks or so now.  It started with increased fatigue that just ended up transforming into what feels like a huge setback.  It has been so hard to function.  My brain burns, my body hurts everywhere which I have increased my CBD dose to help manage, I never wake up rested, my appetite comes and goes and I sometimes get a very strong wave of nausea, I have been feeling really depressed as it seems like I am never going to come out of this wave.  I am also stressed out due to work and tis the season.  Meditation has been a huge help, but it is really hard to focus during meditations and a lot of the time when I am successful in creating stillness I come out of the meditation with the inner shakes.  Exercise is not a thing as getting through my work day is a struggle all on its own.  I will say that work does help me...as long as I am able to make it in.  Working with people definitely helps me take the focus off of how bad I feel.  I am growing in my career despite all of this which makes me happy, but it takes all my energy and I rarely have anything left for my kids and husband.  I do my best and forgive myself when I feel like I am coming up short.  At the end of the day, I am still living my life the best I can right now which I am grateful for that.

[Tweet]

5 hours ago, eboyd said:

I have been in a really bad wave for 3 weeks or so now.  It started with increased fatigue that just ended up transforming into what feels like a huge setback.  It has been so hard to function.  My brain burns, my body hurts everywhere which I have increased my CBD dose to help manage, I never wake up rested, my appetite comes and goes and I sometimes get a very strong wave of nausea, I have been feeling really depressed as it seems like I am never going to come out of this wave.  I am also stressed out due to work and tis the season.  Meditation has been a huge help, but it is really hard to focus during meditations and a lot of the time when I am successful in creating stillness I come out of the meditation with the inner shakes.  Exercise is not a thing as getting through my work day is a struggle all on its own.  I will say that work does help me...as long as I am able to make it in.  Working with people definitely helps me take the focus off of how bad I feel.  I am growing in my career despite all of this which makes me happy, but it takes all my energy and I rarely have anything left for my kids and husband.  I do my best and forgive myself when I feel like I am coming up short.  At the end of the day, I am still living my life the best I can right now which I am grateful for that.

Hi eboyd.

You might want to stop cbd and any other supplements that relax. They may be pushing your mood down too far.

Don't forget your brain is changing as it heals and may not need the same stuff as it did a while ago. 

Be mindful of your limitations. It is better to do a bit less than to overdo and upset others by poor behavior. This is a hard one for me.😊

Stay strong.

[eboyd]

CBD and 5mthf are the only supplements I use.  CBD helps me a lot especially with aches and pains.  I understand things are changing and I am sure this is just a big huge wave with a lot of repair going on and it doesn't really matter what I do I have to go through it.  CBD just makes it a little more bearable for me.