MatrixCode: protracted withdrawal is real - please help me to find my way

[MatrixCode]

I was prescribed with cymbalta and solian for depression in late 2012's.  I have been on it for 7 years but I tried to quit from cymbalta many times just couldn't do it. eveytime I tried to do that I had severe withdrawals from the drug. I was advised to taper from a 60 mg Cymbalta too fast by bridging. I used rivotril for 14 days. then DR prescribed me setraline I used it for 30 days. then I quit from both.  I went into a horrific withdrawal. HORRIBLE. Severe mood swings, quick temper, racing thoughts, scary thoughts, and being afraid for no reason,fatigue,rage, crying spells,, brain fog,depression, flu like weakness, hardly motivation, short breath,restless feelings. feelings like losing sense of empathy and not remembering your routines in a day. and crying periods that starts with fatigue. which I am having everyday now. I did a very fast taper. 

 

 I am not sure whether it is best to go back on the cymbalta at a small dose then taper at incredibly small amounts later on or keep going without drugs at this point. 

 

 

Edited March 19, 2019 by Shep
added username to title

[SkyBlue]

On 3/6/2019 at 6:51 PM, MatrixCode said:

I did a very fast taper. 

Hello and welcome to SA.

 

How fast did you taper? Please put a short history of your most recent drug dosages and changes into a drug signature using these instructions: 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/18343-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

These drugs are very powerful, as you have seen, but it is possible to come off them safely and slowly. When we know more about your situation, we can talk more.

 

Again, welcome. 

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
fixed quoted textbox to reflect new username

[MatrixCode]

hello SkyBlue

 

My doctor put me to 30 from 60 immediately. I stayed on 30 for a month then he stopped me taking cymbalta. 

 

I don't know what to add more. Im having waves and windows I think. Im having crying spells during the day. no doctor would understand me in my country. Im all alone. I don't how how to help myself.

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
removed quoted textbox with old username

[MatrixCode]

Hey please help me Im new in this forum but having so hard days................ everyday Im having crying spells..... Im reading from the forum.. can I reinstate to cymbalta and do slow taper? or what can I do to help myself?

[SkyBlue]

When did you stop the Cymbalta (please add month/year) -- and you went off 30mg? You said you'd also been on 60 mg? How long was that?

 

These questions are important. 

 

You asked about reinstatement -- 

Take a look at this topic and see what you think about it (especially the first post):https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/7562-about-reinstating-and-stabilizing-to-reduce-withdrawal-symptoms/

 

 

Withdrawal can be very difficult. It is important to develop self-care skills in addition to the practical matters of reinstating/tapering/holding, etc. Please see the Self-Care section of this site: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/forum/8-symptoms-and-self-care/

You may also wish to visit other members' threads and see what is working for them. Many members find a sense of community from checking on fellow members and following their journeys. 

[MatrixCode]

l started taking cymbalta in 2012 starting with 30 mg. l took 30 mg for 2 months then started taking 60 mg and stopped taking it in 2019 january 14

 

 

lm  without cymbalta for nearly 50 days. my withdrawals so difficult that l somehow want to reinstate during that time. l think l can't cope with it for years if l go through paws. l read a lot in the forum now thanks.

[MatrixCode]

please help

[Gridley]

 

On 3/7/2019 at 11:00 PM, MatrixCode said:

l started taking cymbalta in 2012 starting with 30 mg. l took 30 mg for 2 months then started taking 60 mg and stopped taking it in 2019 january 14

 

 

lm  without cymbalta for nearly 50 days. my withdrawals so difficult that l somehow want to reinstate during that time. l think l can't cope with it for years if l go through paws. l read a lot in the forum now thanks.

 

 

I have asked the other moderators for their ideas about reinstatement.

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
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[Gridley]

 

On 3/7/2019 at 11:00 PM, MatrixCode said:

l started taking cymbalta in 2012 starting with 30 mg. l took 30 mg for 2 months then started taking 60 mg and stopped taking it in 2019 january 14

 

 

Can you please put the above  information in your signature?  It makes it easier for the moderators when they are looking at your situation.  Here is the link to your signature:

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.

 

 

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
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[Altostrata]

Hello, MatrixCode.

 

Do you have any Cymbalta left? If I were you, I'd open a capsule and take 6 beads. This may be enough to reduce withdrawal symptoms.

 

You'd take this at the same time each day until you feel a lot better, then reduce gradually bead by bead.

 

If you can't get Cymbalta, you might be able to take a very small amount of Prozac. Please let us know how you're doing.

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
removed old username and added new username

[MatrixCode]

hello Altostrata

 

 

I have cymbalta left still. is it ok to return to cymbalta after 51 days?

 

 

[Gridley]

 

Reinstatement most dependably works within 3 months of your last dose.  At 51 days, you're still within that window of opportunity.  

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
removed quoted textbox with old username

[MatrixCode]

I made a capsule from 6 beads now in capsule. 

 

but today my doctor prescribed me zyprexa to reduce my withdrawals. what do you think friends? can I go on taking cymbalta 6 beads or zyprexa?

[Altostrata]

I would try reinstatement of 6 beads of Cymbalta. Zyprexa is a more dangerous drug, it is an antipsychotic that can cause blood sugar problems and movement disorders.

[MatrixCode]

Altostrata

 

 

I took 6 beads capsule now. will see if it cuts down the symptoms.  can I really take it everyday until my crying spells get better? thank you so much brother

[Altostrata]

You'll be taking it every day for weeks, let your nervous system rest.

[MatrixCode]

Thank you Altostrata

 

how many weeks can I take it? (6 beads)  can I estimate when my nervous system will start to feel better? will I increase the amount of beads? I just want to feel better and normal. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[MatrixCode]

hello. today I took 6 beads of capsule again. is it ok?

[MatrixCode]

but it didn't stop my crying spells. I cried for an hour  I was miserable and had suicidal thoughts. what does it mean? please help

[MatrixCode]

my nervous system is so weak that I easily cry, easily get angry and can't stand to heavy noise, talk.....how can I continue? please help

[MatrixCode]

even a scary, sad thought started to make me feel tearful, cry.

[MatrixCode]

I was prescribed with cymbalta and solian for depression in late 2012's.  I have been on it for 7 years but I tried to quit from cymbalta many times just couldn't do it. eveytime I tried to do that I had severe withdrawals from the drug due to fast taper from 60 to 30. I didn't know that I could count the beads back then. then I was advised to taper from a 60 mg Cymbalta to 30 mg too fast by bridging. I used rivotril for 14 days which was my DR's command. then DR prescribed me setraline I used it for 30 days then It didn't make me feel good. then I quit from both.  I went into a horrific withdrawal. HORRIBLE. I don't know if they are from cymbalta or setraline or both.  Severe mood swings, quick temper, racing thoughts, scary thoughts, and being afraid for no reason,fatigue,rage, crying spells,, brain fog,depression, flu like weakness, hardly motivation, short breath,restless feelings. feelings like losing sense of empathy and not remembering your routines in a day. and crying periods that starts with fatigue. which I am having everyday now. I did a very fast taper. 

 

 I am not sure whether it is best to go back on the cymbalta at a small dose then taper at incredibly small amounts later on or keep going without drugs at this point. 

 

 

[MatrixCode]

will my crying spells ever end? Im starting to think I lost my sanity during crying spells. it happens every day. should I reinstate? 

 

 

are my withdrawals related to both of these medications? ( zoloft for a month and cymbalta for years)

 

how can I go on......

[ChessieCat]

On 3/9/2019 at 7:04 AM, Altostrata said:

I would try reinstatement of 6 beads of Cymbalta. Zyprexa is a more dangerous drug, it is an antipsychotic that can cause blood sugar problems and movement disorders.

 

Altostrata is SA's founder and has done much research and psychiatric drugs.

 

Her suggestion is to take 6 beads of Cymbalta.

[ChessieCat]

Each member has only 1 Introduction topic where they can ask questions and journal their progress.  This keeps your history in one place.  Please continue to post here in your Introduction topic.

[MatrixCode]

thank you. much appreciated 

[Gracee]

@MatrixCodeI have sensory sensitivity.   Sounds like you might have it too.   I get overwhelmed with noise, crowds, bright lights, smells and bumping and touching.    It makes me crazy so I avoid all those stressors.   Some people find relief when they cry.   I hate to cry and try to insulate myself from things that make me sad.   I have an invisible, protective shield that I figuratively pull around me when bad stuff happens.    This sounds like avoidance to some, but I find safety in my comfort zone.    On the other hand I have done lots of CBT which includes flooding, or intentionally putting yourself in uncomfortable situations to learn to be comfortable in them.    Sounds crazy, but I have managed to travel all around the world alone...Africa, Asia, Europe, Russia, South America.   I did most of these travels after turning 60.   I'll be the first to admit it was not easy, but it was soooo rewarding.    Sadly I have never made it to Turkey.   Please take hold of your strengths and let them empower you.    There is so much we can achieve even in the throws of depression and anxiety.

@Gracee

 

G.

 

 

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
replaced old username with new username

[MatrixCode]

Gracee

 

yes I have that situation now but I started having it after I quit cymballta at once. my nervous system feels so weak. Im just having withdrawals. I have now sensivity for light, people's talking and anything that makes me tired.

[ChessieCat]

increased-sensitivity-to-light-noise-sound-exercise-etc

 

[MatrixCode]

@ChessieCat

 

That's also what Im having now. also crying periods which I think related to my nervous system. I took my 6 beads capsule today. 3rd day. haven't seen improvements yet

[Gridley]

On 3/10/2019 at 10:02 AM, MatrixCode said:

I took my 6 beads capsule today. 3rd day. haven't seen improvements yet

Give it time.  It takes about 4 days for a dose change to get to get to full state in the blood and a bit longer for it to register in the brain.

 

Edited March 20, 2019 by Shep
changed quoted textbox to reflect new username

[MatrixCode]

Im still having crying spells so much. please can I do to prevent it.

 

I don't know if Im doing the right thing with reinstating or am I just making things worse. doctors in my country won't help. this web site is my last hope.

 

 

I had a terrifying horrible withdrawal just 10 minutes ago.

 

 

[bubble]

You are doing the right thing. I know it is very very hard but do your best to be patient and have faith in the process. Look for all the positives, however small. Don't worry about your overall state. That will improve gradually.

 

When you say you had horrible withdrawal 10 mins ago it seems that you have periods when you feel better. Your symptoms can't disappear over night but they will disappear gradually. You will have crying spells for some time. That's natural. As if you broke your bone - it would hurt badly for some time before it starts healing..

 

After I reinstated I read a lot about the process here and it gave me hope. Hang in there.

[ChessieCat]

Here's some additional information which might help you to understand what is happening:

 

Recovery isn't linear it happens in a Windows and Waves Pattern

 

Withdrawal Normal Description

When we take a psychiatric drug, we are adding chemical/s to the brain.  The brain then has to change to adapt to getting the chemical/s.  It might have to change something to do with A and then once that change has been made it affects B so another change has to be made and so on down the line.  It is a chain reaction, a domino effect.

 

The same thing happens when we take the drug away.  That's why it's possible to experience such a vast array of withdrawal symptoms, and they can change, and be of different intensity.

 

are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take

 

These explain it really well:

 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

On 8/31/2011 at 5:28 AM, Rhiannon said:

When we stop taking the drug, we have a brain that has designed itself so that it works in the presence of the drug; now it can't work properly without the drug because it's designed itself so that the drug is part of its chemistry and structure. It's like a plant that has grown on a trellis; you can't just yank out the trellis and expect the plant to be okay. When the drug is removed, the remodeling process has to take place in reverse. SO--it's not a matter of just getting the drug out of your system and moving on. If it were that simple, none of us would be here. It's a matter of, as I describe it, having to grow a new brain. I believe this growing-a-new-brain happens throughout the taper process if the taper is slow enough. (If it's too fast, then there's not a lot of time for actually rebalancing things, and basically the brain is just pedaling fast trying to keep us alive.) It also continues to happen, probably for longer than the symptoms actually last, throughout the time of recovery after we are completely off the drug, which is why recovery takes so long.

 

AND

 

On 12/4/2015 at 2:41 AM, apace41 said:

Basically- you have a building where the MAJOR steel structures are trying to be rebuilt at different times - ALL while people are coming and going in the building and attempting to work.

It would be like if the World Trade Center Towers hadn't completely fallen - but had crumbled inside in different places.. Imagine if you were trying to rebuild the tower - WHILE people were coming and going and trying to work in the building!  You'd have to set up a temporary elevator - but when you needed to fix part of that area, you'd have to tear down that elevator and set up a temporary elevator somewhere else. And so on. You'd have to build, work around, then tear down, then build again, then work around, then build... ALL while people are coming and going, ALL while the furniture is being replaced, ALL while the walls are getting repainted... ALL while life is going on INSIDE the building. No doubt it would be chaotic. That is EXACTLY what is happening with windows and waves.  The windows are where the body has "got it right" for a day or so - but then the building shifts and the brain works on something else - and it's chaos again while another temporary pathway is set up to reroute function until repairs are made.  

 

[MatrixCode]

@bubble did you reinstate to cymbalta too? after how many months did you reinstate? thank you for your beautiful support.

 

my mornings are nightmare. I can't even look to the sunshine. feel awful during the mornings. totally HELL. then my hell period finishes and I start to feel normal for some time.

 

I wouldn't reinstate if I always feel like I feel now but.... from morning until the evening I was in pure hell. so I reinstated with 1 mg doses. yes I have periods that I feel better. 

 

 

[MatrixCode]

@ChessieCat

 

when we are in a wave it feels like we have always been unwell and like we will always be unwell.

 

 

That's exactly me today in the morning. I lost the connection with my logical side then obsessive thinking starts. then I start to feel that Im goinig to die. 

 

then waves stop and Im starting to have a window. Thank you so much for the sources.

 

 

now I think Im having a window. Im feeling alright. but  I know it's temporary. 

 

Is there anything that I can do to feel better (less panic) when Im having waves?

 

may 6 beads of cymbalta trigger waves in a bad way? and should I stop tapering off my solian until  Im stable with cymbalta? THANK YOU