koala Posted April 21 Author Share Posted April 21 1 hour ago, Xcaretuk said: Thank you Koala I will look into this 🙏 Hope you’re doing okay xcaretuk. Up and down for me. Thank goodness for the ups. None of my posts are medical advice, just my own experience. Please see your doctor for any medical advice. Overview of drug history: 1991: Prothiaden short stint; 2000 - 2003(?): Nefazodone then paroxetine 2005(?) to 2023: Escitalopram 10mg (with breaks and attempted breaks - see further below) October 2023: Escitalopram 5mg More recent experience quitting escitalopram: Late 2019 - tapered over about 6 weeks - 6 weeks later reinstatement (full dose) taking about 3 weeks to stabilise Late 2021 - tapered over several months to 2mg - held there and then fairly quickly off - 3 months later reinstatement (full dose) taking about 6-8 weeks to stabilise. 2023 - tapered over several months to 1mg then jumped to 0mg on 12 August 2023.September 2023: saw "The Antidepressant Story" and found SA website. 29/9 - reinstatement at 2mg; 10/10 - 5mg; 5/12- 6mg; 11 January 2024 - 10mg; 16 January - 8mg Link to comment
Xcaretuk Posted April 21 Share Posted April 21 2 hours ago, koala said: Hope you’re doing okay xcaretuk. Up and down for me. Thank goodness for the ups. Been struggling a bit, but hanging in there. Thank you for asking 🙏 1998(approx.) 20mg Paroxetine, 1998 -2015 various unsuccessful tapers, 2015 app 6 month taper to 0, 2015 approx 6 months later reinstated original brand after debilitating neurological delayed WD symptoms. Made worse after surgery.2023 Famotidine, Cetirizine, New Generic, muscle relaxer. March/April19th June, 2023 - 23rd July, 2023: Paroxetine Dosage reduced from 20mg to 15mg (on 15mg for 35 days), no significant symptoms. 24th July, 2023 - 26th July, 2023: Paroxetine Dosage reduced from 15mg to 12.5mg (on 12.5mg for 3 days), no significant symptoms. 27th July, 2023 - 3rd September, 2023: Paroxetine Dosage reduced from 12.5mg to 10mg (on 10mg for 39 days), no significant symptoms. 4th September, 2023 - 15th September, 2023: Paroxetine Dosage reduced from 10mg to 5mg i.e. 10mg every other day (on 5mg for 12 days), although not noted, must have experienced some symptoms, as I decided to return to previous 10mg dosage on the 16th September. 16th September, 2023 - 25th November, 2023: Dosage increased from 5mg to 10mg i.e. 10mg every day (on 10mg for 71 days), symptoms start dates: Late September sweating, shaking and right side upper back pain., 5th October 23: Upper back pain worsening,21st Oct 23: Night time symptoms: insomnia, nausea, sweats, headaches, some anxiety (predominantly in the mornings)27th Oct 23 admitted to hospital with 1st hypertensive crisis with severe frontal headache (now suspected of withdrawal ) BP 225/115. Admitted twice more with high BP . Doctors at a loss for cause. Given anti nausea, anti anxiety and sleeping tabs in hospital. . 1st Nov 23: , heart palpitations, some anxiety.. 7th Nov 23: Anxiety was now becoming more frequent (not severe). 26th November, 2023 Dosage increased from 10mg to 20mg possibly first time taking 20 mg of Extine, new manufacturer. 3rd Dec 23 - 18th Dec, 23: Started taking 7.5mg - 15mg of Oxazepam when anxiety became unbearable only took 8 in total now stopped. Symptoms now more severe have head pain rather than headache. .Electrical shocks through body overnight accompanied by head pain. Sheer terror,. Sore eyes. 23rd Dec 23: All symptoms remain the same i.e. severe except for the last 2 days where my anxiety levels have not been as severe/ extreme and somewhat manageable (later in the day).22 Jan 24 Have some windows now but still suffering from all day head pain, upper back pain, waking up inner restlessness and terror , nausea, intermittent feelings of fear and wake up 12.30 am every morning and sometimes up to 3 times a night with weird tingling down arms and back, pounding heart head pain and nausea. 2nd March 24, head pain/eye pain everyday and all day and & night wake ups.. Mild Akathisia early morning,, upper back pain, sweats. Anxiety much better. 21st April 24, drop 2.25% drop to 19.5 mg to test help with head /eye nerve pain and new symptom tinnitus. Link to comment
koala Posted April 22 Author Share Posted April 22 Hi @Emonda Koala here in another wave of misery and fear and concerned that it’s now been about 7 months. Life keeps feeling like it’s getting back on track and then collapsing again. It is hard not knowing if I’m doing the right thing for myself. I can’t keep doing this forever. This forum is a great source of information. But what I don’t really have is a diagnosis that says what you’re experiencing is still a kind of protracted withdrawal. I have no doubt it was brought on by quitting the AD too quickly and I now also have no doubt that this happened at least twice before. WD is the only thing that makes sense to me of the fact that I would be fine and stable on a very low dose (e.g. 2 mg) and then spiral out of control going to 0mg. On previous occasions reinstating on a standard dose beought stability - although this took longer than expected last time. This time, having found SA and the info here I have tried to do it differently, although I increased back up to 8 mg. This is 80% of a standard dose. There have been weeks when I have felt great. But then I find myself again in a run of days like today. I am not working. It now also feels to me like I’ll have to give up my part time study because I am too often spiralling into days like today and the thought of assignments is too stressful. I have read through posts about how long does reinstatement take to bring stability and I cannot find any clear accounts of it taking this long. I guess my choices are 1) continue to hold and hope life gets better for longer periods 2) increase to a standard dose, perhaps on the hypothesis that I need it, at least for now 3) decrease - but honestly I cannot think why I would do that at this point. Can any moderators offer any thoughts? I appreciate it. Koala None of my posts are medical advice, just my own experience. Please see your doctor for any medical advice. Overview of drug history: 1991: Prothiaden short stint; 2000 - 2003(?): Nefazodone then paroxetine 2005(?) to 2023: Escitalopram 10mg (with breaks and attempted breaks - see further below) October 2023: Escitalopram 5mg More recent experience quitting escitalopram: Late 2019 - tapered over about 6 weeks - 6 weeks later reinstatement (full dose) taking about 3 weeks to stabilise Late 2021 - tapered over several months to 2mg - held there and then fairly quickly off - 3 months later reinstatement (full dose) taking about 6-8 weeks to stabilise. 2023 - tapered over several months to 1mg then jumped to 0mg on 12 August 2023.September 2023: saw "The Antidepressant Story" and found SA website. 29/9 - reinstatement at 2mg; 10/10 - 5mg; 5/12- 6mg; 11 January 2024 - 10mg; 16 January - 8mg Link to comment
Administrator Emonda Posted April 22 Administrator Share Posted April 22 16 hours ago, koala said: another wave of misery and fear 16 hours ago, koala said: Life keeps feeling like it’s getting back on track and then collapsing again Really sounds like windows and waves. 16 hours ago, koala said: But what I don’t really have is a diagnosis that says what you’re experiencing is still a kind of protracted withdrawal. I'm not sure the average doctor would give you this, sadly. 16 hours ago, koala said: I have no doubt it was brought on by quitting the AD too quickly and I now also have no doubt that this happened at least twice before. We can see these things with clarity with the benefit of hindsight. I wish I knew ~25 years ago what I know now about tapering. 16 hours ago, koala said: On previous occasions reinstating on a standard dose beought stability - although this took longer than expected last time. I had a similar experience. 17 hours ago, koala said: There have been weeks when I have felt great. But then I find myself again in a run of days like today. ...windows and waves... 17 hours ago, koala said: I guess my choices are 1) continue to hold and hope life gets better for longer periods Option 1 makes sense to me. Option 2: A doctor will gladly increase your dose, and add something else into the mix. Option 3: I'd be waiting until you feel stable. I'm sorry you are going through this. I wish I could be more helpful. I will chat to one person offline for their insights...but I expect they will say exactly the same as what I have. Please don't send me PMs. I am not a doctor. My comments are based on my personal experience with ADs and tapering. Consult your doctor about your own medical decisions. 2017 – 2022: Vortioxetine 15mg, Jan ’22, 15mg->5mg over 4 weeks, Feb ‘22 5mg -> 7.5mg due to WD, July ’22 6.75mg (found SA website), Aug 6.07mg, Sep 5.46mg, 11 Oct 5.00mg, 18 Oct 4.88mg, 25 Oct 4.75mg, 1 Nov 4.63mg, 8 Nov 4.5mg, 3 Jan ’23 4.39mg, 10 Jan 4.28mg, 17 Jan 4.06mg, 13 Feb 3.95mg, 20 Mar 3.85mg, 3 Apr 3.75mg, 10 April 3.65mg, 31 May 3.58mg, 8 June 3.50mg, 15 June 3.43mg, 22 June 3.35mg, 12 Jul 3.29mg, 19 Jul 3.22mg, 26 Jul 3.15mg, 3 Aug 3.09mg, 30 Aug 3.02mg, 7 Sep 2.96mg, 14 Sep 2.89mg, 21 Sep 2.82mg, Oct 11 2.75mg, Oct 19 2.70mg, Oct 26 2.64mg, Nov 2 2.59mg, Nov 23 2.53mg, Nov 30 2.48mg, 7 Dec 2.43mg, 17 Dec 2.38mg, 19 Jan 2.33mg, 26 Jan 2.28mg, 2 Feb 2.24mg, 8 Feb 2.19mg, 29 Feb 2.15mg, 7 Mar 2.10mg, 14 Mar 2.06mg, 21 Mar 1.99mg, 10 Apr 1.95mg, 17 Apr 1.91mg, 24 Apr 1.87mg, 1 May 1.83mg, Link to comment
Administrator Emonda Posted April 23 Administrator Share Posted April 23 Hey Koala, Another person has kindly read your thread and agrees that option 1 makes the most sense. They said they wouldn't add anything that I haven't mentioned already. It's not a nice process, is it... Keep pushing. Please don't send me PMs. I am not a doctor. My comments are based on my personal experience with ADs and tapering. Consult your doctor about your own medical decisions. 2017 – 2022: Vortioxetine 15mg, Jan ’22, 15mg->5mg over 4 weeks, Feb ‘22 5mg -> 7.5mg due to WD, July ’22 6.75mg (found SA website), Aug 6.07mg, Sep 5.46mg, 11 Oct 5.00mg, 18 Oct 4.88mg, 25 Oct 4.75mg, 1 Nov 4.63mg, 8 Nov 4.5mg, 3 Jan ’23 4.39mg, 10 Jan 4.28mg, 17 Jan 4.06mg, 13 Feb 3.95mg, 20 Mar 3.85mg, 3 Apr 3.75mg, 10 April 3.65mg, 31 May 3.58mg, 8 June 3.50mg, 15 June 3.43mg, 22 June 3.35mg, 12 Jul 3.29mg, 19 Jul 3.22mg, 26 Jul 3.15mg, 3 Aug 3.09mg, 30 Aug 3.02mg, 7 Sep 2.96mg, 14 Sep 2.89mg, 21 Sep 2.82mg, Oct 11 2.75mg, Oct 19 2.70mg, Oct 26 2.64mg, Nov 2 2.59mg, Nov 23 2.53mg, Nov 30 2.48mg, 7 Dec 2.43mg, 17 Dec 2.38mg, 19 Jan 2.33mg, 26 Jan 2.28mg, 2 Feb 2.24mg, 8 Feb 2.19mg, 29 Feb 2.15mg, 7 Mar 2.10mg, 14 Mar 2.06mg, 21 Mar 1.99mg, 10 Apr 1.95mg, 17 Apr 1.91mg, 24 Apr 1.87mg, 1 May 1.83mg, Link to comment
koala Posted April 23 Author Share Posted April 23 I really appreciate this Emonda. I have had family members (who have been very supportive, but who haven't read any of the information I have passed on to them to help them understand what I'm going through) upping the pressure to resume a full standard dose. It is so easy when I'm in difficulty to feel like I must need the drug, particularly when this has been my only path back to sanity when I have had withdrawals in the past (without knowing that's what they were). There were of course difficult times in life that led me to take the drug in the first place and that weighs on me as well during the waves. What I experience in the waves is quite different to back then and my attitude towards myself and life, as well as my coping skills, has changed completely. But the fact both are instances of mental/nervous distress with some of the same dark themes emerging, can make it easy to confuse what I am experiencing with those bad times. Reinstating at a lower dose has taken away the more purely physical symptoms like dizziness and definitely taken the edge off the worst of the fear and dread - at least most of the time. But life really is in a limited limbo state - despite the good days and weeks - and sometimes I would try anything to help bring this painful chapter to an end sooner - especially since this is just to stabilise before tapering. Thank you again. You are very generous with your time. None of my posts are medical advice, just my own experience. Please see your doctor for any medical advice. Overview of drug history: 1991: Prothiaden short stint; 2000 - 2003(?): Nefazodone then paroxetine 2005(?) to 2023: Escitalopram 10mg (with breaks and attempted breaks - see further below) October 2023: Escitalopram 5mg More recent experience quitting escitalopram: Late 2019 - tapered over about 6 weeks - 6 weeks later reinstatement (full dose) taking about 3 weeks to stabilise Late 2021 - tapered over several months to 2mg - held there and then fairly quickly off - 3 months later reinstatement (full dose) taking about 6-8 weeks to stabilise. 2023 - tapered over several months to 1mg then jumped to 0mg on 12 August 2023.September 2023: saw "The Antidepressant Story" and found SA website. 29/9 - reinstatement at 2mg; 10/10 - 5mg; 5/12- 6mg; 11 January 2024 - 10mg; 16 January - 8mg Link to comment
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