success ☼ Purplestars22: celexa withdrawal

[Purplestars22]

Hey Hopefull, thanks for stopping by my thread. I am doing okay with a lot of the symptoms but not as severe as last month, that time was really harsh wave. My current symptoms brain fog, bad memory, irrational thoughts, insomnia, flashing images when falling asleep. Thankfully I have had a chunk of the day with lessening symptoms. Hope you found something to be grateful today best wishes, ps22.

[Hopefull]

That is great news, Purplestars 22.

The flashing images will eventually dissappear.

I had this for a while.

Do you experience nightmares that coincide with weird chest feeling?

Like you are experiencing a low grade panic attack, without the palpitations but a feeling of tight weird chest feeling.

I have been experiencing this latley.

Have you tried lavender oil to help you feel calm and help you with insomnia issues?

You could put few drops of lavender on a cotton ball and place it under your pillow.

Maybe this will help to keep you relaxed and calm.

 

 

 

Best wishes, Hopefull.

[Purplestars22]

Hey Hopefull, yes I have experienced that uncomfortable feeling with the heart after a nightmare. I take magnesium and that seems to help somewhat. I also try to be mindful with the feeling and let it be. I have tried lavender before when I used to have really bad anxiety. Now I will start using it for the insomnia issue. Thanks for stopping on my thread, ps22

[Hopefull]

Hi Purplestars22,

 

It makes me feel better to know that I am not the only one experiencing this.

 

Thank you, Hopefull.

[Purplestars22]

It's been 33 months that I have been on Celexa wow I can't believe it's been that long. I always thought by this time I would be in a different situation in regards my healing. Oh well I guess I can't have any preconceived time frames in healing but just know that I will heal one day or else I will get discouraged. The past month has been horrible with so many horrible symptoms like insomnia, brain fog, irrational thoughts, psychotic symptoms, paranoia thoughts, auditory hallucinations, I feel like I am loosing my mind. I hope the symptoms dissipate soon because this is so hard to deal with. Wish everyone well and to keep moving forward...

[Hopefull]

Hi Purplestars22,

It has been a while since your last update.

Don't get discouraged.

Are you almost off Celexa?

It is hard but one step at a time.

How often do you experience auditory hallucinations and paranoia?

Are you seeing any improvements?

Lessening of some symptoms?

Keep positive knowing that you will heal.

Best wishes, Hopefull.

[Purplestars22]

Hey Hopefull, I meant to say that it's been 33 months off Celexa omg this brain of mine because of brain fog I forgot to proofread it. For the auditory hallucinations only when it's a really bad wave, bad pms or when under too much stress. For the irrational paranoia thoughts when I am under stress. I have seen lessening of symptoms such as, no more Dp/Dr, no more acute anxiety, improved sleep, more exercise tolerance. Other symptoms have stayed the same and some worse. Thank you so much for your positive assurance and hope you are doing well.

[Hopefull]

Hi Purplestars22,

You are most welcome.

It is great that you are noticing improvements. This healing process is frustrating at times, but on the positive side, you are free from Celexa.

Full recovery is inevitable.

I have read parts of the book by Dr Perry, "The Boy That was Raised as a Dog" and this boy was emotionslly neglected by his carer. His carer who was mentally retarted,raised him amongst his dogs and looked him up in a dog cage. The boy was mentality way behind his peers and he was unable to walk. Dr Perry worked with this boy and with the right therapy the boy started to improve emotianally and physically. He learned to sit, display affection. He continued to improve. At first other doctors thought that Dr Perry was waisting hospital resources because they did not believe that the boy was able to recover from such neglect, because at the time the doctors were sceptical about the brains ability to rewire/remodel it self.

 

But Dr Perry proved them wrong and this wasback in 1995.

When I read this, I thought if this boy was able to make such remarkable progress and recovery, there is no reason why I am not going to recover too. We all will. Some people will heal faster, others slower. Stay positive.

Everything will work out in the end.

Best wishes, Hopefull.

[Purplestars22]

Hey Hopefull, thanks for writting the story bout the boy it gives me so much hope and peace that I will heal from this. Remember you will heal completely and get better also everyone here in the forum. Yeah that's right everyone healing time will be different, also I won't get discouraged because mine is taking longer. You are so sweet and a great person thanks again. Ps22

[LexAnger]

Hi purplestar,

 

So happy to hear your great improvement! This is a great sign as it's the time also to see huge healing per healing time frame!

I believe you are at the turning point for lots great and fast improvement!

Lex

[AliG]

Hi Purplestar.  It's hopeful that you're experiencing a lessening of symptoms. It's a positive sign that shows there is a great deal of healing taking place. You have come so far and been so patient with the process. That is so key, in my opinion.

 

I know firsthand how difficult that can be.  For me, it sometimes felt like I was just spinning my wheels and not really making progress but " behind the scenes " there were obviously many repairs going on. That is why patience is so important because you have to have trust that healing is happening even though you're not always aware of it and it can seem excruciatingly slow.

 

I'm glad you updated and are traveling well. I hope you continue to keep us posted on your progress.

Ali

[Purplestars22]

Hey LexAnger, thanks I hope so because its been nonstop with so many symptoms. Hope it's getting easier for you with each drop with less reactions. Sending healing thoughts, ps22

[Purplestars22]

Hey AliG, I am grateful that at least I have lessening of some symptoms that's a plus for for me. Yes patience and trusting the healing process is not only vital but necessary when one is in this process. Its great that you are doing much better than before and hope you are able to put wd behind you soon. Best wishes, ps22

[AliG]

P.S.  I'm sure you will be able to do that soon as well. ( put W/D behind you )  I know how hard it is. It's very easy to just say the words - " stay strong " ,  " it will get better " etc. but it really is true.

Sometimes , words are not enough. However, that is all we have unfortunately. I hope things turn around for you very soon.

Hugs and best wishes.

Ali

[Purplestars22]

Hey AliG, thanks for your well wishes. You are such am asset to this forum and hope you have an amazing day today. Ps22

[Hopefull]

Hi Purplestars22,

 

Thank you for your kind words. Thank you. You come across as a really nice person too. As AliG has mentioned, healing is happening behind the scenes.

 

Take care, Hopefull.

[Flowers]

Hi PS

 

Thanks for visiting my thread and giving me encouragement and advice. It means a lot. 

 

 

I know you have been through some really rough times so I truly hope things are still improving for you with lessening symptoms.

 

Hugs from Flowers xxx

[Purplestars22]

Hey Flowers, your welcome. Lately I it hasn't been so bad because there have been lessening of symptoms. Any moment can change in regards of withdrawal. Hang in there you got this, ps22

[Flowers]

Glad you are getting a bit of a break.

 

xxxxx

[Purplestars22]

Since my last post wd has been difficult with some symptoms. I have had really bad brain fog, fatigue, irrational thoughts, some sleep irregularities, low stress tolerance, head pressure, feel out of it, feeling sluggish mentally, and cognitive difficulties. I am just trying to push through every day with the hope that it gets better. It can get so old going through this for four years( one year of tapering erroneously and three years of wd) but it's like my new normal. Hope everyone is doing well...

[Purplestars22]

Hello everyone, it's been awhile since I last posted more than two months ago. Currently I am in vacation with my family having my widthdrawal symptoms rev up because I do not get along with my sister. She is a very toxic, hostile and combative person and in withdrawal I am super sensitive to it. I haven't been able to sleep well because of the costisol surging, neuroemotions and rumination. I have two more days to go hopefully I can distance myself from her. Now I know that I can't go to trips with her because it is not healthy for my mental health. Withdrawal has made me realize that's it's very vital to do self care and not put oneself in uncomfortable situations. Hope everyone's doing well.

[andy013]

Hi PurpleStars, I was reading your thread and it reminded me of something that has helped me with brain fog. Light therapy. You can buy these light boxes to treat Seasonal Affective Disorder. I have owned one for many years. It helps you to wake up in the mornings and regulate your body clock. I remember that I had chronic brain fog for about two and half years and then I started using the light box and I had some significant improvements. More recently I started to use it again to try and wake up earlier without an alarm (if you use it every morning for a while then you start to wake up naturally at that time) and this time I also noticed the foggy head feeling reduce substantially after several days. I also noticed that I feel significantly more energy and my mood is stable and I feel more content. It's by no means a cure for withdrawal as I still have other symptoms that it doesn't seem to affect but it definitely helps me to feel better overall.

 

Here is the light I have: http://www.philips.co.uk/c-p/HF3309_01/energylight/overview

 

I don't think Philips sell this model anymore. They started making smaller blue lights that are supposed to do the same thing, but I tried one and it didn't seem to have the same effect. I prefer the large white light box. They are 10,000 lux which is a measure of brightness. Most ordinary lights are much dimmer than this. I simply sit in front of this light in the morning while at my computer for 10-15 minutes and then I feel very awake. You need to be careful because if you use it for too long it can cause mind racing and hypomania. If you didn't want to buy a light then you may be able to get the same effect by going outside or sitting by a very bright window for 15 minutes. Perhaps your lifestyle already exposes you to bright light regularly and so you wouldn't get the same effect as me. I live in Scotland and it can often be quite dark here.

 

You may be wondering why a light would have any effect on brain fog. It turns out that you have these receptors at the back of your eye that regulate your body clock. In the day time bright light hitting the back of your eye increases serotonin and makes you feel more awake. At night once the light gets dimmer your brain begins to convert this serotonin into melatonin and you begin to feel sleepy. Exposure to bright light during the day increases serotonin in the brain. It's a pretty cool way you can influence brain serotonin without having to take any drugs or supplements.

 

Take Care

Andy

[Purplestars22]

Hello Andy013, thanks for your post, it was helpful. I will look into the light box to see if it will work for me. Hope you are doing well, ps22

[Purplestars22]

Hello everyone on this forum,

      Wow I cannot believe that its been three years that I have been on this forum. Time definitely flies by. In regards to my journey in withdrawal, I can honestly say that my windows/ waves dissipated by late 2017, and I recovered from withdrawal. Of course, that is not to say that I may have some issues with anxiety or other things but its not the cause of withdrawal, I believe. All my symptoms of rumination, depersonalization, derealization, a sense of uneasiness, unable to exercise(because it would worsen my symptoms), agoraphobia,  feeling loss of control, severe brain fog, low blood pressure are all gone. With the pandemic going on that is another major stressor on staying healthy and safe, but sometimes I think if I survived withdrawal then I am resilient and can handle anything. By surviving withdrawal it has given me a sense of strength and courage.

 

I have come a long way since my last dose was December 2013, which I mistakenly did the worst possible way to taper and hence my withdrawal it was such a horrendous and arduous experience which I hope no one ever goes through and learns from my experience. (If you are easily triggered I would recommend to avoid reading my thread). I remember that for a whole year I experienced horrible withdrawal symptoms but I never lost hope and faith that one day, I would be okay. I just want to say if someone reading this and are in the depths of withdrawal please do not lose hope and it will get better and just know that recovery is most definitely not linear and there will be many setbacks but trust that your nervous system is healing itself in the background of all these symptoms. And please follow a conservative tapering schedule that fits you and take it easy during this time when the nervous system needs the minimal stimulus. And one more thing please do not compare your healing process to another person this process is individualistic just because it happens to someone does not mean that it pertains to you or it will happen to you. 

 

During withdrawal, it was hard for me to do stuff but I still pushed myself, which I do not recommend. I still went to works for a couple of days and went to school but I believe that hindered my recovery process and may be the reason why my withdrawal took five years. Since, withdrawal I have been able to work and go to school successfully, travel and take flights by myself. And I have even dated lol which I never did in withdrawal that was out of the question, during that time I was only able to concentrate on healing and not on another person.

 

I want to thank all the members that encouraged me, gave me advice, listened to me and most of all gave me hope when I most needed it. I greatly appreciate Altostrata and I want to thank her for making this forum when a previous forum closed down. Atostrata, you have worked hard and just know that your hard work does not go unnoticed and you are saving many lives. I remember when I was at my lowest point of withdrawal and was desperate because I felt I was loosing control and I messaged you. Without this forum, I do not know where I would be today, it has saved my sanity and taught me that its not only in my head what I was going through and I was not the only one going through that withdrawal journey. Now I know why people would disappear from this forum not from malicious reasons but just because they were regaining their life and it was too fresh the wound of withdrawal.

 

I want to wish recovery and well wishes to everyone in this forum. Please take care and lets believe in the healing process.            

                                                       Best wishes, Purplestars

 

[Leila]

This sounds like a success story, Purple! Thank you for sharing this and give hope to us!🙏

[Noh1995]

Wow, great news. Congratulations on your recovery. It really feels great to feel yourself again ❤️✨☀️

[bijay]

@Purplestars22  It is wonderful for you to come back and post your success.  I'm sure that for most people, the time when they needed this forum is one they would rather forget and leave in the past, but you are truly helping others by returning and showing us how the mind and body can heal.  In essence, you provide hope.   Thank you. ❤❤❤

[Kimboslice]

That’s great news.. I just saw an old comment of yours on a old success story from 2016 and thought I’d click on your profile and see how you’d been getting on. What great timing 😁 & very encouraging. I’m 23 months and have recently started getting windows with genuine clarity for sure but since travelling home for Xmas and being home with the family have been in a monster wave.  The downs after the ups Are exhausting and always hard to take. Roughly when did the  process begin to smooth and you realise you were going to recover? 
much love.

[Purplestars22]

5 hours ago, Leila said:

This sounds like a success story, Purple! Thank you for sharing this and give hope to us!🙏

Hello Leila, you are welcome. Hang in there in your journey and take care, Purplestars

[Purplestars22]

4 hours ago, Noh1995 said:

Wow, great news. Congratulations on your recovery. It really feels great to feel yourself again ❤️✨☀️

Hello Noh1995, Thank you, yes it does and I am sure you and everyone in this forum will experience being on the other side of withdrawal. Take care, Purplestars

[Purplestars22]

2 hours ago, bijay said:

@Purplestars22  It is wonderful for you to come back and post your success.  I'm sure that for most people, the time when they needed this forum is one they would rather forget and leave in the past, but you are truly helping others by returning and showing us how the mind and body can heal.  In essence, you provide hope.   Thank you. ❤❤❤

Hi Bijay, you are welcome. Thank you, I hope I can give people a glimpse of hope. I remember when I would rejoice reading a success story on this forum when I was suffering so much and for so long. My withdrawal experience and the forum will always be part of me and changed me for the better. Take care, Purplestars

[Purplestars22]

2 hours ago, Kimboslice said:

That’s great news.. I just saw an old comment of yours on a old success story from 2016 and thought I’d click on your profile and see how you’d been getting on. What great timing 😁 & very encouraging. I’m 23 months and have recently started getting windows with genuine clarity for sure but since travelling home for Xmas and being home with the family have been in a monster wave.  The downs after the ups Are exhausting and always hard to take. Roughly when did the  process begin to smooth and you realise you were going to recover? 
much love.

Hi Kimboslice, Thank you. I am happy that you are getting windows. Oh and I totally understand about the wave, when I traveled with my family during withdrawal I experienced a horrible setback. But it just showed me that to set boundaries with certain family members and not be around them until my nervous system was strong again to handle stressors and it also showed me to have a lot of self care. Yes they are exhausting, for me I would take one step forward then two steps back in regards to symptoms. I just tried to have a lot of distractions, not think about my symptoms and have a lot of patience and most of all acceptance of what I was going through. I would say roughly in the third year the healing process smoothed out. Hang in there and take care, Purplestars

[almuPA]

WoW, thank you, thank you and THANK YOU for coming back and let us know your success story. It really give us hope:) 

I am so happy for you, you are an inspiration!

Lots of love<3

[Purplestars22]

14 hours ago, almuPA said:

WoW, thank you, thank you and THANK YOU for coming back and let us know your success story. It really give us hope:) 

I am so happy for you, you are an inspiration!

Lots of love<3

Hello almuPa, you are so welcome. I am so glad that I can bring hope. Thank you, if I can overcome wd based on my erratic tapering schedule and horrific prolonged withdrawal you and the rest of the people in this forum will get better.   Take care, Purplestars

[Kimboslice]

Thanks for the reply @Purplestars22. I’d just like to ask one more question if I can. I noticed during the first 2-3 years you actively logged your withdrawal until 2017. I hope you don’t mind me asking, what were your reasons for taking a back seat and remaining inactive on the site until your recent update? I’m just intrigued if it was an action you took strategically or just something that happened naturally as you improved. 

[Hopefull]

Well done Purplestars 22!