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Hellbutrin

Hellbutrin: Wellbutrin nightmare - advice welcome

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Waiting12

Yep, seems par the course for a healing nervous system. Have you read this thread?

 

 http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=66397.0

 

I got a bunch of new symptoms at 19 months off. I never had health anxiety til then and it went clean off the charts. We just have to remember symptoms wax and wane, come and go, come back again, change intensities, new ones pop in and out, and then go away, etc...

 

I’m still trying to normalize the new symptoms I’ve been experiencing. That’s the key I think, to normalize. Sit with the sensations with non-reactivity & try to be neutral. Write down when things come and go, so next time you can say “ok, I had this last week, it lasted X amount of time and went away. It will go away this time too.” While making mental note of the time. After a few cycles of the same symptom you’ll realize it’s just another symptom that has joined the party & no cause for alarm. Harder said than done, I know & I am still very much working on this. It does feel very odd to get hit with new stuff later on even though that also seems normal for recovery. I’m trying to see it as a new area healing.

 

 

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Hellbutrin

I just want to stop living in hell

 

Almost 17 months and I don’t know how much more I can take. 

 

Edited by ChessieCat
added topic title to post and moved to intro

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Hellbutrin

I just want to stop living in hell

 

Almost 17 months and I don’t know how much more I can take. 

Edited by Shep
added topic title to post and moved to intro

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Shep

Hellbutrin, moderators are having to move your posts off the Finding Meaning section - please keep these kinds of posts to your own Introduction thread. 

 

Your repeated statements "I don't know how much more I can take" need to be addressed with someone in person if you are contemplating suicide. Please see:

 

For those who are feeling desperate or suicidal

 

If you are not feeling suicidal, but simply overwhelmed, please work on strategies of coping because you are repeatedly wiring your brain to go into dark spaces. This can create negative neuroplasticity.

 

Norman Doidge - The Dark Side of Neuroplasticity video (2 minutes)

 

In order to stop these thoughts, here are some resources:

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 

Neuro-emotions

 

"Change the channel" -- dealing with cognitive symptoms

 

For many of people who show up on SA, the process of coming of psych drugs is a long and arduous one. 

 

Are We There Yet? How Long is Withdrawal Going to Take?

 

If you are feeling suicidal, please seek support on the ground. 

 

 

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Leo1983

How long were you on meds all together?

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Altostrata
On 10/22/2018 at 11:54 AM, Altostrata said:

We have to cope with occasional odd symptoms, Hellbutrin. How are you doing with managing your health anxiety?

 

Hellbutrin, you have seen some improvement but constantly emphasize the negative. Yes, recovery is slow and frustrating. Please find face-to-face counseling for coaching in self-soothing and coping techniques.

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Wellbutrinsucks

@Hellbutrin, what are your symptoms now? I too have been off of Wellbutrin for 17 months and am feeling a surge of symptoms too. I also understand your desperation to get out of this hell as I have had several setbacks over the past few months and am just wondering what to do. I kinda feel like Wellbutrin users are a bit ignored.

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SkyBlue
2 hours ago, Wellbutrinsucks said:

I kinda feel like Wellbutrin users are a bit ignored.

 

People tapering off any SSRi are given equal attention here. 

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Wellbutrinsucks

Wellbutrin is an antidepressant but not an SSRI, and it seems like people don’t really understand what it’s like coming off that particular drug.

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Kristine

Just thought I’d pipe in here if that’s ok. Yes, It’s not an SSRI but is often used as an an adjunct medication to an SSRI. I have come across many people on this site struggling to come off Wellbutrin and struggling after CT (myself included). Wellbutrin is a  brand name as is Zyban but many people on this site will refer to Wellbutrin as it’s generic name (ie...active ingredient) which is Buproprion. Other searches on SA including these other names (in bold) may give more information. Also in some countries such as Australia it is only used “off label”as an antidepressant and only approved by the TGA as a smoking cessation aid. K 

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ChessieCat
On 11/8/2018 at 1:01 PM, Wellbutrinsucks said:

Wellbutrin is an antidepressant but not an SSRI

 

I think Songbird SkyBlue meant to say "psychiatric drug".

 

Edited by ChessieCat
corrected error

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Wellbutrinsucks

To me it seems like some of the symptoms I’ve experienced most other people haven’t, but maybe I just need to look further. But @Hellbutrin I completely understand what you’re going through. Wellbutrin sucks.

 

it also seems like you’ve developed health anxiety because of this. I can say I have too and sometimes it can be pretty severe, but know that you’re not alone in this, at all.

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Leo1983

They all suck.

 

My Gp is about to meet my solicitor!

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Marmot
2 hours ago, Leo1983 said:

They all suck

I found that too

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Marmot
On 11/6/2018 at 11:39 PM, Hellbutrin said:

I just want to stop living in hell

Any things you could try to feel a little better? Do you have someone in the physical world to talk to?

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Hellbutrin
On 11/7/2018 at 7:07 AM, Leo1983 said:

How long were you on meds all together?

18 months

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Hellbutrin
11 hours ago, Marmot said:

Any things you could try to feel a little better? Do you have someone in the physical world to talk to?

Yes, my husband and my mom have been very supportive. Unfortunately it just helps me get through the days. No matter what I do I can’t seem to get over the intense withdrawal fear.

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Carmie
1 hour ago, Hellbutrin said:

Yes, my husband and my mom have been very supportive. Unfortunately it just helps me get through the days. No matter what I do I can’t seem to get over the intense withdrawal fear.

 

Hi Hellbutrin, 

 

Im so sorry to read that you are struggling so much. The horror of withdrawals n the neuro emotions can make us definitely spiral downhill. Focusing on the fear though will just continue to make things worse.

 

It really isn’t easy trying to focus on the positive when your symptoms are so bad but because we can’t really do anything about them we need to think about WHAT CAN WE DO to get through each n every day. We need to find things that distract us even if we don’t find any pleasure in them.

 

Was there something you enjoyed doing before the withdrawals? Even going outside n sitting in nature for a while might be a little soothing. I know these aren’t solutions to the withdrawals but they can help us cope, even if we are only managing to live a moment at a time. 

 

Lately while going through bad waves I’ve been doing diamond paintings where I stick little beads on paintings. It’s like paint by numbers, you stick the beads on the numbers n letters they go on. It just keeps my mind from spiralling into the severely negative mode. I have found many, many distractions to keep me going.

 

We will heal eventually, we just don’t know when. I’ll still be tapering n going through withdrawals for at least ten years but I know I will get there in the end. I’m looking at the end goal but at the same time living in the present n doing what I can to get through each day as best I can.

 

I saw that you are taking magnesium once a day. It’s been recommended on this site too to put the magnesium in water n sip on it all day long. Have you tried that? I haven’t used magnesium as yet but I will one day, I think there is a bit of procrastination happening there.😄

 

I read your thread briefly, I don’t have much concentration at the moment, and I saw counseling being mentioned. Have you been able to chat to anyone? I always found fastereft really beneficial for negative emotions. It’s something else I want to get into one of these days again. I did it for ages n wanted to start it up again but haven’t gotten around to it yet. 

 

What I have been doing is journaling though, I find that very beneficial. There’s something soothing to the brain about getting your worries n thoughts down on paper. 

 

Take care, sending you hugs🤗

 

 

 

 

 

 

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ChessieCat
18 minutes ago, Carmie said:

What I have been doing is journaling though, I find that very beneficial. There’s something soothing to the brain about getting your worries n thoughts down on paper. 

 

I created a topic about journalling a while back:  Journalling - Therapeutic Writing & Health Benefits

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jen84

Hi Hellbutrin, I read on someone else's post that you had your IUD removed? Has that eased any symptoms for you? 

 

I feel your pain! Even though I am still tapering off wellbutrin (currently at 10mg), i am experiencing fairly rough anxiety. I obsess over things I don't need to be obsessing over, and it breaks my heart to think like that. I've been seeing a counsellor for 4 or 5 months now, and it has helped to ease my mind that my anxieties aren't real. It just sucks though, bc my brain is soooo good at convincing me its real. 

 

Anyways, just wanted to say hello, and let you know you're not alone in this crazy wellbutrin world. I hope you've had some relief from your symptoms.

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Hellbutrin

20 month update, no change. 

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Altostrata

What is your daily symptom pattern now, Hellbutrin?

 

Did you ever get anywhere with increasing your fish oil and magnesium?

On 9/24/2018 at 1:09 PM, Altostrata said:

According to what you've got in your signature, you're not taking enough fish oil and magnesium to do much.

 

How about the health anxiety, how have you addressed that?

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Hellbutrin
36 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

What is your daily symptom pattern now, Hellbutrin?

 

Did you ever get anywhere with increasing your fish oil and magnesium?

 

How about the health anxiety, how have you addressed that?

I stopped taking both altogether months ago. They were giving me terrible acid reflux and indigestion. 

 

My health anxiety is not improved, so I mostly ignore it. If the brain fog and depression would go away I might be able to better cope with my "health anxiety". As of now, I spend everyday trying to make it to the next. 

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Hellbutrin
20 hours ago, Altostrata said:

What is your daily symptom pattern now, Hellbutrin?

 

Did you ever get anywhere with increasing your fish oil and magnesium?

 

How about the health anxiety, how have you addressed that?

I've had a dislocated TMJ for a little over two years. Would it be worth seeing a doctor about whether this is contributing to the severity of my brain fog/memory issues

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Altostrata

Look on the Web for self-care stretching exercises and massage for TMJ. You may also need a night guard for clenching.

 

On 2/11/2019 at 1:43 PM, Hellbutrin said:

As of now, I spend everyday trying to make it to the next. 

 

Yes, that's pretty much how you have to do it, but add self-care techniques where you can.

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WiggleIt
12 hours ago, Hellbutrin said:

I've had a dislocated TMJ for a little over two years. Would it be worth seeing a doctor about whether this is contributing to the severity of my brain fog/memory issues


Hello Hellbutrin,

I've been trying to catch up on your story, and I have a question about your dislocated TMJ.  Has it been imaged and diagnosed as dislocated?  

I ask because I suffered with TMJ issues for years in WD, but it has slowly improved.  When I was in my first 2 years of WD, my TMJ was tight, painful, and truly torture.  It would click and crack and get stuck to where I could not close my mouth.  My TMJ is WORLDS different now!  So I'm wondering if you have a diagnosed dislocation or not.  If there is truly a physical dislocation, that's one thing.  But it's also possible that you're going through what I went through, and time was my healer for my TMJ.  

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ChessieCat

I had issues with my jaw for a few weeks.  I think it was after my Pristiq dose was increased from 50mg to 100mg.  I thought I had tetanus, which is also called lock jaw.  If it had continued I was going to get it investigated, but it didn't last.  When I opened my mouth past a certain point it would get stuck open and and to close it I had to physically press my lower jaw up, it would get to a painful part and then click back into place.

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Altostrata

I fixed my painful TMJ myself with stretching, self-massage, and a night guard from my dentist. The joint clicked back into place.

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Hellbutrin
6 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

I fixed my painful TMJ myself with stretching, self-massage, and a night guard from my dentist. The joint clicked back into place.

What type of stretches did you do?

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Altostrata

I found some TMJ stretches from chiropractors on YouTube. You could find them too, if you looked.

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Hellbutrin
On 2/12/2019 at 11:54 PM, WiggleIt said:


Hello Hellbutrin,

I've been trying to catch up on your story, and I have a question about your dislocated TMJ.  Has it been imaged and diagnosed as dislocated?  

I ask because I suffered with TMJ issues for years in WD, but it has slowly improved.  When I was in my first 2 years of WD, my TMJ was tight, painful, and truly torture.  It would click and crack and get stuck to where I could not close my mouth.  My TMJ is WORLDS different now!  So I'm wondering if you have a diagnosed dislocation or not.  If there is truly a physical dislocation, that's one thing.  But it's also possible that you're going through what I went through, and time was my healer for my TMJ.  

I had an mri two years ago and it is definitely dislocated. The doctor I saw said that he will need to complete a minor surgery in order to put the joint back into place. The only thing stopping me from going through with the surgery is the fear that the anesthesia will set back any healing my CNS has done (even though it’s hardly healed at all). 

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Wellbutrinsucks

I had an upper GI in January 2018 and was put under anesthesia and it didn’t set me back in regards to symptoms. I know it’s scary to think of what being put under anesthesia can do to you since we’re so sensitive to stuff, but I’d honestly say that it didn’t hurt me at all.

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Leo1983

Hi.

TMJ causes alot of the symptoms you still have.

The head fog and memory stuff is all linked.

Many say they feel better after having it sorted. 

 

Leo.

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Leo1983

 

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Altostrata

Medical doctors will leap to surgery for a lot of conditions that can be corrected by physical therapy, because they are not well-informed about it.

 

No more discussion of TMJ in Hellbutrin's topic until she reports trying self-care, including stretching and self-massage, or seeks physical therapy for TMJ.

 

No more complaining instead of self-care.

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