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sunnysideup69: what can I do to stabilise on venlafaxine

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sunnysideup69

A friend sent me this yesterday, writing from Jeff Foster

 

WE ARE WARRIORS OF ANXIETY

Sometimes anxiety lives as a gentle rumble in the background of our daily lives.

But sometimes, the floodgates of our experience are flung wide open, and raw anxiety surges in the body like a tidal wave.

Maybe we are going through a tough time in our lives, a crisis, a change, the end of a relationship, an illness, the sickness or death of a loved one, or the falling-away of an old dream or "safety net", and scary thoughts trigger an anxiety response in the body. Maybe our anxiety comes out of nowhere. Maybe we are touching into a past trauma, and old painful feelings are threatening to emerge into conscious awareness. Maybe we are simply imagining things that aren’t really true, invoking things that aren't really there. Maybe something just needs to be processed in us, dealt with, felt to completion, brought into love, integrated into a bigger picture of self.

Yes, sometimes anxiety comes, unwanted and unexpected, into the foreground of conscious experience, instantly bringing a pounding heart, a racing mind, heat and sweat and tingly limbs, nausea and tightness in the belly and chest and throat, and a feeling of the ground falling out from under us. We feel like we want to run, to crawl out of our own skin, to escape to safety, to find solid ground again...

Anxiety can be mild, or it can be really intense and scary and powerful like this. When anxiety comes in such a tidal wave, it can really feel like “Something is going horribly wrong!”. Our thoughts may tell us that we are about to die, or pass out, or have a heart attack or stroke, or go completely mad, or lose ourselves in some terrifying void.

The anxiety itself can feel unsafe. We can become anxious about our anxiety!

The truth is, these symptoms of anxiety are completely safe. Pounding hearts are safe. Muscle tightness is safe. That ‘sinking feeling’ in the belly is safe. Racing thoughts are safe. Heat and sweat and that dizzy, groundless, disconnected feeling is totally safe. It might not feel safe in the moment, it might not feel pleasant, but it’s totally safe. It is just a passing storm of sensation and thought. It’s the body deep in protection mode. It’s nature at its most brilliant and ancient and fierce. It doesn’t mean that something “bad” is happening or is "about to" happen.

We learn to ‘lean in’ to the storm of our anxiety, to let the body do what it’s doing. To recognize that we are experiencing anxiety in the present moment, to name the visitor, to bring mindful awareness to it, and to compassionately touch into it, with courage and slowness and breath. We begin to allow the heart to race and pound, and we allow the shakiness and trembling and the heat, and we allow the tight belly and the tingles and that doom-laden sinking feeling. We allow the moment as it is, messy and intense and uncomfortable and alive, as it is. We tell ourselves, “Yes, I am experiencing anxiety right now, it is really really intense, but it is totally safe, it is the nervous system rushing to protect the organism, and nothing more than that, and it will pass, and I can hold it all…” We learn to step into that bigger part of ourselves, that ever-present Being in the midst of the somatic storm.

We learn to stop fighting the anxiety, to stop shaming it, to stop calling it bad or wrong or dangerous (and if these thoughts come, we recognize them as anxious thoughts too!). We learn to stop running from our anxiety, stop trying to get to some “safer place”. We learn that the safest place is actually right here, where we are, at the very heart of our anxiety! We learn to bow to anxiety’s awesome power and intelligence, and to ride the wave of anxiety as it arises, reaches its peak, and crashes back to its source.

We become warriors of anxiety! We get brave enough to touch into our fragility and vulnerability, to meet this most sacred and ancient of somatic visitors, which is only trying to protect us, keep us safe, and remind us of our true power.
 

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Tom37

Thanks for the post on my thread. Im pretty sure your right and everything will settle down again but like always in wd there is always that doubt until it happens.

 

Caught up on your thread and looks like your now trying to stabilise after switching to venlafaxine. Hope your doing ok and that anxiety settles down. Im lucky that anxiety has only really been a minor symptom and never had the physical anxiety symptoms that so many get. Seems like I’ve had every other symptom but that one which I’m thankful for.

 

As you know it can time after changing so try to be patient and try to stick to same dose for to give yourself the time you need to get there. All the changes do add up so can take a while to settle.

 

Take care 

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sunnysideup69
Just now, Tom37 said:

Thanks for the post on my thread. Im pretty sure your right and everything will settle down again but like always in wd there is always that doubt until it happens.

 

Caught up on your thread and looks like your now trying to stabilise after switching to venlafaxine. Hope your doing ok and that anxiety settles down. Im lucky that anxiety has only really been a minor symptom and never had the physical anxiety symptoms that so many get. Seems like I’ve had every other symptom but that one which I’m thankful for.

 

As you know it can time after changing so try to be patient and try to stick to same dose for to give yourself the time you need to get there. All the changes do add up so can take a while to settle.

 

Take care 

Thanks Tom, appreciate the support. Yeah, I did a switch, got impatient, but switching has brought its own issues. I've made so many changes and I've now learned the hard way that the issue was never really about 'needing a new antidep.' Although, the Citalopram got totally fed up with me and I couldn't keep anything in. So I felt I had to do something.

I've also learned the hard way that psychs have no idea, really. Paid around £625 in August to switch and have a follow up, to be still in this 'stabilising' situation. Ouch! Was getting that info for free, here. So, this forum is now my advice centre, I've realised first hand that psychs and gps are really uninformed about this process.

So yep, now waiting to stabilise. It's a long winding road, this.....no more switching or updosing for me. Have had some really good stretches of time where I feel 'normal,' so am hanging in there. Going about my 'normal' life as much as possible, working part time, socialising every now and again. Coping as best I can with withdrawal symptoms, which have really been building up since October 2017, am now realising. Hopefully in another couple of years, I'll be stable...and I also hope it happens sooner than that.

Have a good day, Tom!

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sunnysideup69

Ok, so I think I'm in a bit of a wave. Realising I have been feeling progressively worse since Saturday, thought it was a cold, but am now realising all the symptoms are also indicative of WD.

I've been under the weather, achey, dizzy, headachey, shivery ie temperature dysregulation, and my gut has been dodgy. Super anxious, bit panicky, palpitations and also super flat and finding sleep a bit tricky.

Does this sound like a wave? I hope it bogs off soon. Luckily am on half term break, but it's frustrating as there were loads of things I wanted to do...but all I feel like today is vegetating on the couch. Walked a long walk this morning but now feel exhausted, didn't get the usual lift from it.
 

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Tom37

Sounds like a wave which will pass. Try to  think of it as the nervous system doing it’s thing trying to heal which we have to go through to get to the other side. The emotional and sleep being affected are always the worse so hang in there until it passes 

 

Hopefully you will feel but better afterwards as your overall baseline continues to rise but it can be very slow going and it’s probably better to look at your progress in months not days or weeks.

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sunnysideup69

Feeling tearful this morning as I write, feeling so crap.This definitely feels like a wave, I'm really 'off', and the symptoms I thought were a cold are probably WD. Dizziness, heightened anxiety, palpitations, gastric disturbances, low humming in ears, slept for hours yesterday, want to withdraw. No sense of taste.

 

Notes for Wednesday 23rd October 2019

 

Woke early, didn't see time, restless sleep for a while

450 awake

5am make tea, stomach less gurgly, anxiety 3, headache behind brow and dizziness

7am sore gut, headache, take Venlafaxine 75mg XR

8am warm bath plus 2200mg fish oil, 150mg magnesium cit

830am lower colon pain

9am 5k walk then grocery shopping, mixed feelings, anxiety about 3, flatness of affect 2

1115 arrive home and prep lunch

1230 eat lunch, still have headache, anhdonia/flatness around 3

2pm wave of tiredness/apathy 4, feel like napping, feel exhausted, shivery

3-5pm nap, tiredness 5

5pm wake from napping, feel exhausted and drained 5, humming in ears 

6pm eat super feeling disheartened 5

7pm to 2230pm  in and out of sleep on sofa

All afternoon, since lunch, my stomach has been very noticeably gurgly- can hear all the digestion, feeling vaguely nauseous

2230 bed

 

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sunnysideup69

Wish I could post a photo of the chart I made, but I can't. I've made a kind of monthly 'at a glance' calendar of symptoms but it's very basic, uses colour to show either anxiety symptoms or depression symptoms, and have shaded relevant portions of the day.

 

I can see at a glance which weeks have been worse for symptoms, since switching to Venlafaxine.

Week 2 was bad, mostly anxiety

6th week was bad, mostly anxiety

10th week has been bad, mostly anxiety...have had  physical symptomof dyspepsia and dizziness this week, whereas before mainly psychological

Longest window has been 7 whole days, and that was after the last wave, so.........

 

Actually have noticed that after every wave, I've seemed to have a better week. Is this what is meant as the withdrawal baseline improving? Then the process of ups and downs seems to start again until another wave occurs.

 

Waves scare me and make me believe I'm not making any progress. I kind of give in to the second fear and then gradually realise what I'm doing. I've realised that this morning. I'm also 'fortune telling' and predicting a disaster. Really need to learn to distract because how can I know what will happen at Christmas when I can't even predict tomorrow?
 

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sunnysideup69

Hmm...I've been having epsom salts baths most days, plus taking magnesium, and my stomach and digestion have been really gurgly and weird, and I have some gut pain over the last few days. Am wondering if I'm overdoing the magnesium? I might hold off on the baths, or just use it in the bath every few days.

Anyone think this could be linked? 

I take 150mg tablet of mag cit in the morning

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Gridley
4 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said:

taking magnesium, and my stomach and digestion have been really gurgly and weird, and I have some gut pain over the last few days. Am wondering if I'm overdoing the magnesium? I

 

The most common side effects of magnesium supplements are stomach upset, nausea, vomiting and diarrhea (as nearly all forms of magnesium have a laxative effect).

 

Sunnysideup, it looks like you're getting too much magnesium.  The baths are gentler than the supplement.  You could eliminate the supplement and see if symptoms subside.  If they do, you could reintroduce the supplement but in a smaller dosage.

 

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sunnysideup69
3 minutes ago, Gridley said:

 

The most common side effects of magnesium supplements are stomach upset, nausea, vomiting and diarrhea (as nearly all forms of magnesium have a laxative effect).

 

Sunnysideup, it looks like you're getting too much magnesium.  The baths are gentler than the supplement.  You could eliminate the supplement and see if symptoms subside.  If they do, you could reintroduce the supplement but in a smaller dosage.

 

 

Thanks Gridley. I'm gonna stick to a couple handfuls in the bath. I also eat a LOT of cashews, which are high in mag, I do believe, thank you, this could have solved the sore stomach mystery. Could too much mag also cause anxiety? 

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Gridley
23 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said:

Could too much mag also cause anxiety? 

I haven't seen anything that indicates magnesium causes anxiety, but we all react differently to supplements, so it's possible.

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sunnysideup69
Just now, Gridley said:

I haven't seen anything that indicates magnesium causes anxiety, but we all react differently to supplements, so it's possible.

Ok, thanks Gridley, I think the magnesium is definitely upsetting my gut; or rather, I'm getting too much, via bath and supplement. I've had dyspepsia and nausea this week, I reckon that's why. So, will lay off the supplement for a bit.

Also last week, I was drinking home made kefir every day, so my gut was getting probiotics, too. Poor gut, I've probably overloaded it a bit.

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sunnysideup69

Today, I have mostly sat on the sofa, recovering from a bit of a wave. I think it's on the way out. Tomorrow, am hoping to have my first run in nearly two weeks. That will be nice. Reflecting on how weird this whole process is. I feel like two different people. There's the calm, regulated me, typing this. Then there's the dysregulated one. Very, very strange, it all is.

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sunnysideup69

Hindsight is 20/20, isn't it. Bit of rumination this morning/if only ....but I'm going to share what I've learned over the last year. I wish I'd found this site this time last year, as I would've understood that I was kindled, and it would have changed my actions. However, I didn't, and must accept what has happened and how it has changed me over the last twelve months.

 

There's actually been some really positive growth from this, too, such as better boundaries with my family and at work, as I don't have the energy to be a 'rescuer' any more. I'm learning to take care of myself a whole lot better. I've also made some really positive changes in my diet, I've started yoga and I'm meditating daily.

 

First thing I've learned is about the ten per cent or less taper; it's really, really important. There is no such thing as 'too slow.'

 

Second thing I've learned, which has been a bit scary, is that a huge chunk of medical professionals really don't understand the impact of antidepressants on the nervous system. 

 

The third thing I've learned is that treatments such as acupuncture are not always helpful. I believe that the acupuncture that I had from January to April caused a flare up in my anxiety symptoms and caused my crash in May.

 

The fourth thing I've learned, and I've learned it the hard way, is that updosing and switching drugs does not lead to faster recovery. I ignored advice, got impatient and switched. Not only did that cost me £850, but I'm still basically in the same boat ie trying to stabilise. Ouch! Lesson learned.

 

The fifth thing I'm learning, albeit with difficulty, is how to manage anxiety. This emotion really has been at the root of all my problems over my lifetime. It was the reason I used to self medicate with illegal substances. And it was the driver of my depression and the reason I took antidepressants. My vision is of living a happy, fulfilling, medication-free life one day and I believe it's possible.

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sunnysideup69

Notes for Thursday October 24th Spent the whole day on the sofa, so knackered after last couple days

 

4am wake with anxiety 5, knot in stomach, back to sleep

530am wake, anxious 5, palpitations, knot in stomach, 

6am nauseous and shaky

7am feeling briefly dizzy- this symptom is often here and I forget to mention it

7am Venlafaxine 75mg XR realise I'm inconsistent, some time before food, sometimes after. Will stick to after food.

720am begin eating breakfast, really not hungry, kind of forcing it in

820 run an epsom salts bath, forgot I was running it and water runs cold- so I'm straight in and out

830 resume eating breakfast, dyspepsia 5, anxiety 5

930 anxiety beginning to calm, feeling hunger so I snack

1030 have to run to loo AGAIN (about 4th time already today)

1030 2200mg fish oil, 150mg magnesium citrate

11am ANOTHER loo trip

1145 anxiety has calmed down now 3

Spent the morning figuring out whether I could drop to two days work at school as of December. Financially, I think I could.

1230 ate lunch feeling more relaxed anxiety 2

1430 stomach pains, post about magnesium, seem I may be overdoing it so will cut out supplement and stick to baths for a while

1530 hungry again

1630 anxiety spike for about 30 minutes, no trigger after this, anxiety completely subsides and I feel 'normal' rest of evening

2100 turn computer off; was aiming to wait an hour before sleeping, but am tired, go to bed, fall asleep immediately

 

 

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sunnysideup69

Need to note this; at the weekend in the UK, the clocks go back an hour. I've never worried about this before, but I know Venlafaxine can be a bit difficult if taken late.

 

Wondering whether I should still continue to take my Ven at 7am (which in fact will be 8am old time)? It's an hour's difference. However, as I'm taking the extended release version, am hoping this time glitch won't cause too many problems.

Also, if I adjusted according to movement of clock, it would mean taking it at 6am, which is too flippin early.

Ugh. Hope this won't affect me.

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Erell

Hi you :)

 

don't be sorry about my thread, this time change is a bit confusing ;)

 

How are you Today? Do you find your waves flatten  ? 

 

Hugs ! 

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sunnysideup69
55 minutes ago, Erell said:

Hi you :)

 

don't be sorry about my thread, this time change is a bit confusing ;)

 

How are you Today? Do you find your waves flatten  ? 

 

Hugs ! 

 

Hello lovely, haha, I was busy catching up with you and thought I had switched to my own thread....it is a bit confusing, but I've decided to just take it at 7 new time. An hour difference shouldn't be too bad.

Well, Monday and Tuesday were horrible, with some relief in the evenings; Wednesay was horrible and I slept so much. Yesterday, I stayed on the sofa all day, BUT I think the wave has started to go. Am not waking up so anxious today.

I have temporarily upset my stomach with too much magnesium, but apart from that, I reckon things are calming down, thank goodness. Even going to try a gentle run this morning. Had about 7 hours sleep, too.

How are you?

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Erell

I'm so glad your wave is leaving you !

 

I'm still in the wave, trying To surf with anxiety and dépression, mostly at 6 rate.

I look forward for lower intensity ! 

Have To be patient ...:)

 

Have a Nice day 😙

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sunnysideup69

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/323349.php

 

Interesting. Stopped my magnesium supplement today because after convo with Gridley yesterday, realised I was overdoing it, what with having epsom salts baths too, every day.

Found this today, have been experiencing lots of those symptoms.

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Guilietta

Hello sunnysideup,

 

Good signs - a respite from a wave and able to go for a run (and then come back and sit on the sofa). Isn't it nice when will power and motivation comes back (for a visit).

 

It is that time of year - fall back by one hour. I still don't now why we do this. Have you thought about moving it by 30 minutes? Do you think that might make a difference?

 

 

 

 

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sunnysideup69
2 hours ago, Guilietta said:

Hello sunnysideup,

 

Good signs - a respite from a wave and able to go for a run (and then come back and sit on the sofa). Isn't it nice when will power and motivation comes back (for a visit).

 

It is that time of year - fall back by one hour. I still don't now why we do this. Have you thought about moving it by 30 minutes? Do you think that might make a difference?

 

 

 

 

Hey Guilietta, how ya doin? Oh it was lovely to jog for a bit....but I hav some gut pain so I had to stop early. We figured out too much magnesium, so I've stopped my supplement and am just doing baths every other day of epsom salts.

It was good to get out, it's so good to feel like doing something, for sure. This week has been a bit of a wipeout but I think it's resolving. How are you doing??

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Guilietta

Hello there!

 

I am doing OK -  bit of anxiety about going out in the car today - but managed the round trip. :)   As Erell knows I have been looking for a winter coat - and got one today at a huge discount. :):):) Everyone loves a bargain. 

 

What amount of magnesium were you taking before? It washes out of your system. I am taking magnesium (300 mg).

 

All in all the week was OK - although yesterday I had severe anhedonia - the entire day. Otherwise - the usual collection of anxiety, tinnitus, etc. 

 

Tomorrow or Sunday I will start beads of cymbalta (hopefully 2 will be enough - .4 mg). A bit nervous that it won't be enough. I do'nt want any (more) sysmptoms as I  can function now. Thankfully.

 

Will you take a break tomorrow from running?

 

 

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sunnysideup69

@Guilietta, gonna drop by your thread xxx

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sunnysideup69

Notes for Friday 25th October 2019 

Supplement plan; none for a week.Not sure what I'm reacting to. Will still take Epsom salts bath every other day this week, see how that goes, then reintroduce 1 capsule fish oil, see how that goes. Then, maybe a very little bit of magnesium, 0.25 tablet.

Didn't introduce things gradually before so I need to be a bit more logical.

 

430 am awake, get up, make tea, humming in ears, anxiety 3/4

630 eat breakfast, temp dysregulation, not hungry

640 second trip to bathroom, bowel still overactive , edit to say, this was it for today, less than yesterday, so calming down

650 stomach pains; today, no magnesium supplement

7am Venlafaxine 75mg XR

730am warm bath, no epsom, stomach bloated and painful,  tearful/anxious 3/4, ruminating about /fear of 'the future'

830am anxiety beginning to subside 3

930am feeling tearful but stomach feel better

1030 temperature dysregulation, but anxiety is subsiding 2

1030 out for a gentle 5k jog, will see how much I can do

1130 back home, I jogged 3k but my lower colon was really hurting, so I stopped and walked the rest, pain made me feel miserable

1230pm feeling better, anxiety gone, 0, 

**All morning, lower gut pain and 'prefrontal cortex area' headache

1330 ate lunch, felt relaxed

1400 brief stomach pain after eating BUT still no anxiety

1600 went food shopping, dull headache still but good to be out and about, still feling like I have a lurking cold but suspect this to be WD

I notice that the dyspepsia and bloating feel a lot better in the afternoon

1800 ate supper

2200 went to bed anxiety free since 1230pm, some fatigue 3

 

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sunnysideup69

@Gridley, it's me again, asking for some reassurance. Trying to reassure myself, but at the moment, it's much easier to believe when it comes from someone else, so please forgive me.

 

This week, or since Monday, I feel as if I've been in a bit of a wave as some symptoms have been worse. Specifically, seem to have had a bit of an uptick in the intensity of the anxiety, it feels more panic-like and physical this week, with some palpitations, as well as the usual psychological. Of course, then I over react and tell myself I'm getting worse. I think this is likely to be a bit of a wave, right? And part of Citalopram WD? Am also feeling more withdrawn this week, don't really want to go out and about although am stretching myself a little. Late afternoons and evenings are still better though. On the other hand, my sleep has actually improved over the week. I'm getting a much more solid sleep.

I think I've asked you the same question a few times, apologies, I'm pretty sure that's the anxiety....but also my brain can't quite compute.....

Trying to ride it out and just go about my days, and meditate and do legs up the wall. 

 

Also, forcing myself to watch this again. 

 

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Gridley
4 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

I think this is likely to be a bit of a wave, right? And part of Citalopram WD? Am also feeling more withdrawn this week, don't really want to go out and about although am stretching myself a little.

Sunnysideup,

 

This is very typical, common and normal for someone in withdrawal.  You have nothing to worry about.  There are going to be ups and downs throughout this process.  You're not getting worse.  When the downs last quite a while, it's a wave, and we all have them.  It's unpleasant but completely to be expected.  We all go through the symptoms you describe.  Feeling withdrawn is a natural part of withdrawal too--I certainly have it.  You are healing every day, though it doesn't feel like it.

 

It's great the the later part of the day is better and that your sleep is good.  That's a very encouraging sign that you're doing better--definitely not worse.  It's just AD withdrawal.

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sunnysideup69

@Gridley, god, I don't know where you get the patience...thank you. It's the afternoon and I'm going into busy Swiss Cottage for a haircut. Am nervous, but it will at least make me look better.

 

I am going to ban myself from asking questions in the morning, because they are always driven by Morning Ruth. Morning Ruth and Afternoon Ruth are quite different.

 

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Erell

Hi Sunny!

I wanna thank you for your support!

 

An haircut , Nice! So glad your afternoon is easier 😙

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sunnysideup69

Notes for Saturday 26th October No magnesium or fish oil or epsom today

 

Good sleep, didn't wake til around 4am, then back to sleep

520 wake up, get up, irritable 3

6am anxiety around 4, dyspepsia, shaky, stuffy nose, low humming in head

630 breakfast, no appetite, lower colon discomfort, stomach distended

7am feeling sick, knot in stomach, take Venlafaxine 75mg XR, anxiety 3

9am warm bath, no epsom, anxiety spike 4, feeling tearful

Ever since awakening, negative fortune telling, ruminating, fear of future BUT less stomach pain today

10am take myself out to shops to break the cycle of negative thinking, come back and do household chores, anxiety begins to dissipate

1230pm anxiety now 0

1245 lunch stomach pain 2 as it is digested, much less

1500 leave for haircut, some anxiety about going out and appearing 'normal' haha 2 but that goes as soon as I get to salon, 

1730 arrive home anxiety has been 0 since half three and continues at 0 all evening

1800 supper

2000 fall asleep watching tv

2100 wake...can't go to bed as clocks will go back, will be too early

2300 go to bed

pretty much anxiety free/anxiety low this afternoon and eve

 

 

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Erell

Great afternoon/ evening! This is great! :)

what about this haircut ? Do you like it ? 😚

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sunnysideup69
6 minutes ago, Erell said:

Great afternoon/ evening! This is great! :)

what about this haircut ? Do you like it ? 😚

Yes, hopefully, things calming down. Well, I know they are.

Yes, I really like the haircut, has made me feel refreshed! :D

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sunnysideup69

One day in the future, when I am able to start tapering......it's gonna take me a minimum of 28 months, just worked out 10 percent tapering schedule, cutting every 4 weeks, and I'm likely not even gonna go as fast as that. Will probably need some pauses, too.

 

Best get comfortable, this is the long haul...........

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Erell

One day in the future...all of this Will be a distant memory :)

I don't make calculations on the calendar,  I know it Will take me years To taper...But it is ok because, overall the MOST important is To Feel Well, better :)

 

wish you a Nice day :)

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sunnysideup69

Very wise @Erell xx

 

Notes for Sunday 27th October

 

I think my stomach issues are becoming less after stopping the magnesium overload. Still giving supplements a break, will reintro slowly

 

Woke in the early hours very briefly then back into dream

520 awake, check time, good sleep!

6am low level anxiety and dyspepsia 3, some dizziness 2

7am take Venlafaxine 75mg XR with breakfast

730am warm bath, no epsom salts, dizziness gone, anxiety mild 1

10am begin 'strength'workout

1030am during workout, sudden spike in nausea, palpitations about 3, slowly dissipates (too sudden a reintro to my workouts, need to ease back in)

11am out to buy lunch, anxiety goes 0

1230am ate lunch, was a bit glutinous

1310 wave of tiredness after lunch 3 but no more nausea

1510 brief heart pounding, no known trigger

1700 wave of sadness listening to music, out of the blu, had a cry which is nice as I've felt tearless, felt better

1800 supper

2100 random sadness again but it passes, I go to bed

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Erell

Hi dear you !

Good morning from a very rainy and Grey Brittany 😙

How are you doing ? Feeling better in your stomach ?

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