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Spenitate: paroxetine withdrawal followed by sertraline


Spenitate

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Hi all this is my first post. I’ve put all my medical info in my signature as requested but if I’ve missed anything please let me know. 
 

Full case history:

 
n.b. I don’t expect anyone to feel they have to read all this, I just want to get it off my chest!

 

I’ve had issues with depression and anxiety since childhood (no particular trauma: suspect a strong genetic component as evident in other family members too). Severe depression around 19/20 due to college stress led to me going to the doctor. Was put on 30mg citalopram which made me suicidal and gave me auditory hallucinations among other symptoms almost immediately. Doctor told me to ‘keep going’ but decided to stop - a million percent the right decision and one I wish I had made later.

 

Was put on a low dose of paroxetine either once or twice (not sure) for short periods in my twenties after going to the doctor with anxiety/depression. No severe side effects I can remember, seemed to see a noticeable improvement, and came off drugs without issue.

 

In my late twenties I went to the doctor again with depression and was prescribed 7.5mg paroxetine. Again no side effects and a noticeable improvement. After a few months I went back to the doctor and told her I was feeling much better and would like to come off the paroxetine. She told me this would be a mistake - that people often thought they should come off and actually got much worse when they did, so I should stay on the drugs. I accepted this, assumed that I was just one of those people who needed this medication to be ‘normal’ (I believed completely in the chemical Imbalance idea) and continued taking the medication. On a personal note this is the part of my medical history that makes me the angriest. There was a window at that time in which I was trying to do what was best for my mental health, and trusted my doctor against my own instincts. I may well have suffered adverse reactions if I had stopped taking paroxetine then, but I personally suspect strongly it would have been less severe due to the low dose, shortness of duration, and the fact I was younger. I may be wrong but I’ll never know.

 

I stayed on paroxetine for the next ten years. Over time I felt the medication was getting less effective, and every time I went back to the doctor I was prescribed an increased dose (to be fair I’m sure at least once I requested an increased dose as I thought it was what I needed). I don’t remember the exact details but I ended up on 40mg.
 

In the last couple of years I’ve had a very difficult time personally and it became clear the medication wasn’t helping me. I talked to the doctor In early 2020 about coming off paroxetine and trying a new medication - they advised me I would need a couple of ‘quiet’ weeks in a secure environment to do so to manage the change. When the pandemic happened and I was able to work from home full time, I felt I had the space to make the change. The doctor gave me a tapering schedule that was approximately as follows: 3 days on 30-40mg, 3 on 30, 3 on 20-30, 3 on 20, 3 on 10-20, 3 on 10 and then nothing.

 

i had no symptoms during the tapering window and naively thought I had been lucky. I decided to hold off on taking the sertraline because I wanted to see how I managed with no drugs in my system, again I was very naive. Three days after my last pill I became profoundly unwell - suicidal, brain fog, brain zaps, diarrhoea, hypothermic temperature, severe weight loss (21 pounds total in a few weeks) I can’t even recall all the symptoms. I tried to ‘stick it out’ for a couple of weeks until a very sensible friend whose mother is a pharmacist told me I couldn’t keep going like this and my taper schedule had been much too quick, I needed to go back on a low dose.

 

I spoke to a different doctor and agreed to go back on 10mg for a month, then 5 mg for a month then nothing. This still felt too steep so I actually added in three weeks of 5 and 0 alternating (I now realise alternating was a mistake too). My symptoms improved slowly but never disappeared and when I tried to stop completely, again severe symptoms reoccured. Went back to a 5/0 alternating dosage but remained quite ill. Spoke to yet another doctor after a couple of weeks who advised as I was now at such a low dose of paroxetine I should stop taking it completely and start taking 50mg of sertraline immediately. I was so desperate at this point that I felt if the sertraline would set me free from paroxetine I was willing to do this.

 

The next four weeks were pure hell. I suspect because my body was dealing with withdrawal from one drug and reacting badly to another all at once (plus my contraceptive pill was changed due to stock shortages but that’s another story). My physical symptoms were bad but not as bad as before, but I was persistently suicidal. I have an amazing family who took care of me during this period. Even with their help I came close to the brink several times. I was referred to the mental health crisis team who said they would get my doctor to prescribe me mirtazapan to help manage the symptoms. They never processed this and I never followed up as I was determined not to add any more drugs to my regimen. I stayed on the sertraline because I felt I had no choice - all I could do was keep going and hope to make it to the other side.
 

The last six weeks have been bad but I’ve seen an improvement.  I have suicidal days but also good days and I am more able to

manage my own healing. I am back at work after a month of leave. My physical symptoms have lessened but do re-emerge periodically. I am eating all the right foods, taking the proper supplements, exercising, meditating, journaling and doing breathing exercises. I desperately want to come off sertraline but I know I have to get myself in a stronger and more even position before I can do that. The thought that I am trapped on another drug, that coming off it will take literally years, and that I am still so unwell, is profoundly distressing. I feel this experience had almost destroyed me. Forums like this one have been my only comfort at times - seeing other people’s stories has made me feel less alone. so I’m sharing mine in case it chimes with anyone else.

 

I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for here. I cannot taper right now even though I want to so badly I want to throw all my drugs away (obviously I won’t!!). I feel this site has given Me the information I need to tackle it when the time is right, which I am grateful for. I guess it’s just been such a personally devastating experience I wanted to share it in a place it would be understood. Basically, I’m very frightened. 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Moderator

Welcome to SA, Spenitate.  Please don't blame yourself.  We've all trusted our doctors, we've all suffered the consequence.  It's obvious from your post that you've learned a lot from your experiences, so count that as a plus. It's good that you're taking care of yourself and meditating.

 

When the time comes that you feel you're ready to taper, we recommend tapering by no more than 10% of your current dose every four weeks.  Some people can go a little faster, some have to go more slowly, but this is a good starting point.  Since you've been on and off different drugs, your system is sensitized, and I would recommend a conservative approach.

 

Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

 

The Brassmonkey Slide is a way of making micro-taper reductions weekly, as opposed to a larger reduction once a month. I used this method for my Lexapro taper.

 

The Brassmonkey Slide Method of Micro-tapering

 

This link is specifically about tapering Sertraline, including how to get the nonstandard doses you'll need for your 10% taper.

 

Tips for tapering off sertraline (Zoloft)

 

We recommend using non-drug coping skills to deal with withdrawal and with life.  Take a look at the links in the following link and see which techniques might be helpful for you.

 

Non-drug techniques to cope

 

We don't recommend a lot of supplements on SA, as many members report being sensitive to them due to our over-reactive nervous systems, but two supplements that we do recommend are magnesium and omega 3 (fish oil). Many people find these to be calming to the nervous system. 

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker 

 

Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil) 

 

Add in one at a time and at a low dose in case you do experience problems.

 

This is you Introductory topic, where you can ask questions and connect with other members.  We're glad you found your way here.

 

 

 

 

 

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper.   

March 22, 2022: hold at 4.8mg and shift to Imipramine taper

Aug. 5, 2022: shift back to Valium taper.  

Current dose as of Sept. 22, 2022: 3.5mg

Taper is 81% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan-Sept 2016 tapered to 16mg.  

Held until Aug 2021, tapered for 4 weeks to 14.4mg

March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper.  Current dose as of Aug. 5: 9.5mg 

Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5 and shift to Valium taper

Taper is 87% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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Hello Gridley, thank you so much for your kind words and the excellent advice in your post, which I will read carefully!

 

have a wonderful day.

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • 1 year later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

  

5 hours ago, Spenitate said:

Hello there!

 

I registered on this forum two years ago when I first started suffering withdrawal. I’ve mainly lurked since then as I find this whole experience very difficult to talk about, but I could really do with talking to someone who understands what this is like. I wanted to find out if there were any peer support services for the U.K. which others are involved in? I am a good listener and am happy to provide support as well as give it!

 

thanks

 

Important topics in the Tapering forum and FAQ

 

There are links to many helpful topics in the above topic.

 

In Post #1 of the above topic there are links to Tips for Tapering a particular drug topics; in each of these Tips topics, Post #1 explains ways to get non standard doses of that drug.

Please DO NOT TAG me - thank you

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions. 

  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:    (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq      on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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8 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

  

 

Important topics in the Tapering forum and FAQ

 

There are links to many helpful topics in the above topic.

 

In Post #1 of the above topic there are links to Tips for Tapering a particular drug topics; in each of these Tips topics, Post #1 explains ways to get non standard doses of that drug.

Thank you ChessieCat I appreciate it and will have a look!

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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Could someone advise me how I can update my signature? I’ve been tapering off sertraline and would like to update my profile.

 

I’m also trying to find some mutual peer support if possible 😊 I have posted in the U.K. specific thread but not sure if there is any where else I should try.

 

Thanks!

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Please DO NOT TAG me - thank you

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions. 

  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:    (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq      on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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  • Moderator Emeritus

SA encourages members to visit other members' topics and support and encourage them.  If you start to do this then other members are more likely to visit your topic and support and encourage you.  Please remember that a member's intro topic is about them and their journey off psychiatric drugs, so please keep details about your own situation to a minimum when posting in their topic.  If they want to know more about your situation they can visit your topic.

Please DO NOT TAG me - thank you

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions. 

  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:    (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq      on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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Having a rough week. Realised I have been tapering too fast and suicidal ideation is overwhelming. Trying to do all the right things but nothing really helps! Lots of fears about getting older and never feeling happy again. After two and a half years feel I’m relapsing and it’s a very lonely feeling. 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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In hell tonight. Think this may be more than I can stand. Two and a half years and I’m back to wanting to die so badly. I just want to let go

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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Hi there I have a question about reinstating If that’s ok! I reduced my sertraline dosage from 75mg to 1.6mg over the course of several months (still too quickly) and have held there for a few weeks now as I started to feel wobbly. I’ve now been hit by terrible symptoms, particularly suicidal ideation, and I’m wondering whether I should reinstate some of my dosage to help relieve the symptoms? I’ve read all the input on this thread and know it’s a risk, but I haven’t completely removed the drug from my system just drastically reduced it. I could for example try going back to 2 or 3mg.

 

would welcome other people’s perspectives!

 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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Going of what people have written on here it may be best to go up to the dosage u were on before u dropped to 1.6mg and see if it stabilises you 

 

 

 

Hold it for a bit and see if the symptoms disappear or if u feel better if not increase slightly again 

 

 

 

Ive not reinststed ive been off meds now for over 12 months and im having a terrible time but im thinking its a little late now for me to reinstate So im trying to get through each symptom that comes as best as i can its a struggle 

I too tampered too fast and ive hit a wall now 

 

Good luck hope u feel better soon 

We have survived 100 percent of our darkest days we can survive more 

Xx

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2011 diagnosis eupd with psycosis given 50mg quitapine 75mg venlafaxine 

2013 increase of medication 100mg quietipine 150mg venlafaxine 

2014 stopped medication 

2014 reinstated medication 

2017 increase quietipine 150mg venlafaxine 225mg

2019 increase of quietipine 200mg

2020 stopped medication severe withdrawal so reinstated after a week

July 2021 reduced both medications down to zero

Medication free since September 2021

Currently trying vitamin c and magnesium and 5htp to see if it relieves any symptoms

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1 hour ago, shazzak1403 said:

Going of what people have written on here it may be best to go up to the dosage u were on before u dropped to 1.6mg and see if it stabilises you 

 

 

 

Hold it for a bit and see if the symptoms disappear or if u feel better if not increase slightly again 

 

 

 

Ive not reinststed ive been off meds now for over 12 months and im having a terrible time but im thinking its a little late now for me to reinstate So im trying to get through each symptom that comes as best as i can its a struggle 

I too tampered too fast and ive hit a wall now 

 

Good luck hope u feel better soon 

We have survived 100 percent of our darkest days we can survive more 

Xx

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks for replying shazzak- it’s so difficult to know what to do isn’t it! I’m so sorry you are having a terrible time - I know exactly what you are going through and it’s awful. Sending you lots of good wishes - we just have to remember how much we have survived and are still surviving, and believe that one day it will no longer be this hard! 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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I dont want to be the one to tell you to do it but if u feel its what u may need to do then please do it 

We make ourselves worse with the battle of shall i shant i do i reinstate do i stay its a nightmare 

But maybe go back up to the last does u were on and see if it settles give urself a some time to see if u stablise and then reavaluate 

This journey us a long and hard one but we are strong and we can do this the end goal may need slightly pushing back but just keep thinking ill get there 

 

Im hoping my symptoms ease soon some days im ok but others i feel like im climbing the walls with anxiety and ruminating negative thoughts but i push through as much as i can hoping tomoz will be better xx

2011 diagnosis eupd with psycosis given 50mg quitapine 75mg venlafaxine 

2013 increase of medication 100mg quietipine 150mg venlafaxine 

2014 stopped medication 

2014 reinstated medication 

2017 increase quietipine 150mg venlafaxine 225mg

2019 increase of quietipine 200mg

2020 stopped medication severe withdrawal so reinstated after a week

July 2021 reduced both medications down to zero

Medication free since September 2021

Currently trying vitamin c and magnesium and 5htp to see if it relieves any symptoms

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  • Administrator

Hello, @Spenitate

 

On 8/31/2022 at 7:03 AM, Spenitate said:

I could for example try going back to 2 or 3mg.

 

This is a good idea. I'd go back to 3mg. Please let us know how you're doing.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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9 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Hello, @Spenitate

 

 

This is a good idea. I'd go back to 3mg. Please let us know how you're doing.

Thank you Alto I appreciate your advice 😊

 

I am doing horribly at the moment but I have read your story many times and it has given me great encouragement in dark times. I am full of admiration for what you do and hope you are having a good day xx

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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On 8/31/2022 at 6:06 PM, shazzak1403 said:

I dont want to be the one to tell you to do it but if u feel its what u may need to do then please do it 

We make ourselves worse with the battle of shall i shant i do i reinstate do i stay its a nightmare 

But maybe go back up to the last does u were on and see if it settles give urself a some time to see if u stablise and then reavaluate 

This journey us a long and hard one but we are strong and we can do this the end goal may need slightly pushing back but just keep thinking ill get there 

 

Im hoping my symptoms ease soon some days im ok but others i feel like im climbing the walls with anxiety and ruminating negative thoughts but i push through as much as i can hoping tomoz will be better xx

I’m so sorry you are struggling shazzak. I’m in exactly the same place and I know how painful it is. I’ve had to take some weeks off work but I live alone so there is less to stop me having too much time to ruminate as it’s absolutely the worst bit. Please stay strong and look after yourself. I just want to tell you that you are not alone, even when you feel at your loneliest. Take care xx

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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I've had a grim few days if I'm honest. Have gone back up to 2mg as recommended by others on this site and am hoping I will stablise. Lots of suicidal ideation, churning gut, dizziness and general awfulness - plus a bit of insomnia chucked in for good measure. I have been journaling, walking tonnes, eating very little but only healthy things, and taking fish oil. Feel very alone and sorry for myself.

 

I have been trying to see if there is any measure of improvement from my journal entries. I notice that in early August I was having low mornings but better evenings (with some exceptions) but that the too-quick taper I did hit me with a vengeance at the end of August and then I fell off a cliff. I've had to take time off work (I've battled to work throughout this illness as I need a a livelihood plus it gives me something else to focus on) to give my nervous system time to recover. Had to call crisis services but honestly they are worse than useless where I live.

 

I am hoping I can now stabilise on 2mg to be well enough to get back to work. I am not rushing to restart a (much slower) taper. There is that horrible sense of time passing/getting older which I'm sure others have too. It's so frustrating to be still suffering - I have done my best to embrace the acceptance model but I find it really hard!

 

 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Administrator

Hello, @SpenitateHow many days have you been taking 2mg? How did your symptom pattern change?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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7 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Hello, @SpenitateHow many days have you been taking 2mg? How did your symptom pattern change?

Hi Alto, so I went back up to 2mg on the Saturday after you suggested restabilising (I couldn’t quite bring myself to go back up to 3mg and also was scared of making too big a change backwards) and it has been five days now. Although it had been really grim, overall I do think my symptoms have eased a tiny bit (I got violent suicidal ideation on the Saturday night, but no nights since, just during the day when it is more manageable) and although I’m still getting a lot of distress I have noticed some ‘windows’ in the evening. It’s been a rough few days but I think increasing was the right think to do and I am hopefully that if I stick at 2mg things will gradually settle down.

 

Thanks so much for asking, I appreciate it.

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Mentor

Hello @Spenitate. Sorry you’re having a rough ride at the moment. There’s quite a few of us who feel like we’ve been ‘wronged’ by sertraline. I think it’s the most commonly prescribed antidepressant in the UK and is the first line of choice. I thought I’d give you a few links that detail how you can get support through different services in the UK.

 

Ways to help yourself cope in a crisis: https://www.mind.org.uk/need-urgent-help/


If you ever just want someone to talk to over the phone call the Samaritans on: 988

 

It’s pretty difficult to find any healthcare professional educated in antidepressant withdrawal so sometimes it’s better to talk to somebody with no knowledge on the topic. That way you’re less likely to feel patronised and judged.

 

Nothing I say or do is based on medical advice. I make my own choices based on intuition gained through individual research, and a lot of suffering. My intro
CURRENT MEDICATION:

1. Sertraline: 50mg October 2020; 100mg December 2020; 50mg April 2021; 75mg May 2021; 50mg 18 September 2021; big crash 6 December 2021; holding

Current dose: 50mg (Sep 2022)

2. Mirtazapine: 15mg November 2020;

Current dose: 15mg (Sep 2022)

 

PAST MEDICATION

1. Amitriptyline: 20mg Dec 2016 for epigastric pain; 10mg Dec 2017; 0mg Oct 2018 - no withdrawal symp.

 

SUPPLEMENTS: Magnesium Citrate;

LIFESTYLE: No alcohol, nicotine or caffeine

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1 minute ago, Erimus said:

Hello @Spenitate. Sorry you’re having a rough ride at the moment. There’s quite a few of us who feel like we’ve been ‘wronged’ by sertraline. I think it’s the most commonly prescribed antidepressant in the UK and is the first line of choice. I thought I’d give you a few links that detail how you can get support through different services in the UK.

 

Ways to help yourself cope in a crisis: https://www.mind.org.uk/need-urgent-help/


If you ever just want someone to talk to over the phone call the Samaritans on: 988

 

It’s pretty difficult to find any healthcare professional educated in antidepressant withdrawal so sometimes it’s better to talk to somebody with no knowledge on the topic. That way you’re less likely to feel patronised and judged.

 

Thank you @Erimus I appreciate your thoughtful message and suggestions. I think wronged is a very good word for it! I try not to be bitter but after two and a half years I admit it does make me very angry sometimes. 
 

I hope you are doing well yourself x

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Administrator
On 9/7/2022 at 12:17 PM, Spenitate said:

I do think my symptoms have eased a tiny bit

 

This is a good sign. 2mg may be sufficient, or you may wish to decrease after giving it a chance for a week.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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13 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

This is a good sign. 2mg may be sufficient, or you may wish to decrease after giving it a chance for a week.

 

That is good advice, thank you :)

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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Utterly desperate right now after a really, really bad day. I thought I was stablising but now I am not so sure. I wonder if it's worth trying to reinstate to 3mg or even higher to try and get some relief? I don't want to do something drastic but I am desperate to get through this.

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Administrator

What symptoms have gotten worse? How do you feel before and after taking 2mg sertraline?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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9 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

What symptoms have gotten worse? How do you feel before and after taking 2mg sertraline?

I don’t feel specifically worse after taking the sertraline but overall I’ve got increasingly suidical rather than less.

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Administrator
1 hour ago, Spenitate said:

I’ve got increasingly suidical rather than less.

 

These are the symptoms of a "really, really bad day"? What thoughts precede your thoughts of suicide?

 

How's your sleep?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 9/10/2022 at 4:35 AM, Altostrata said:

 

These are the symptoms of a "really, really bad day"? What thoughts precede your thoughts of suicide?

 

How's your sleep?

Sorry to give you a fuller picture, a really bad day includes:

 

suicidal ideation (worst symptom)

tingling/burning in arms

akasthesia

obsessive rumination/anxiety

heart palpitations 

Lack of coordination

dizzy/pressure sensations in head

lack of appetite

panic attacks

 

to be clear I am aware that I am luckier than other people in that my physical symptoms, whilst unpleasant, are more moderate. However my mental symptoms are complete torture - the obsessive thinking and suicidal ideation are relentless. The suicidal ideation is brought on mainly by terrors about aging and what I have lost to this illness but to be honest anything can set me off.

 

 

my sleep on bad days is about 1-2hrs (woken by cortisol around 1am) 3-4 on good days.

 

since I last updated I have seen increasing windows and am planning to hold where I am without making further dose changes for a good long while.

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Administrator
1 hour ago, Spenitate said:

The suicidal ideation is brought on mainly by terrors about aging and what I have lost to this illness but to be honest anything can set me off.

 

This sounds like something you can manage rather than allowing it to overcome you. Are you working with a psychotherapist or other counselor?

 

1 hour ago, Spenitate said:

since I last updated I have seen increasing windows and am planning to hold where I am without making further dose changes for a good long while.

 

This is a very good sign. Hang in there.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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On 9/18/2022 at 10:44 PM, Altostrata said:

 

This sounds like something you can manage rather than allowing it to overcome you. Are you working with a psychotherapist or other counselor?

 

 

This is a very good sign. Hang in there.

 

Thanks Alto. I am working with a therapist but also looking at options to work with a psychiatrist as I think my issues may need more in-depth handling. As with so many people here I have lost a lot of trust in the medical profession so it has been hard to reach out for help of that kind, but I am trying.

 

My current focus is stablising on the 2mg, with no rush at all to make any changes. I have good and bad days and am endeavouring to get the right support in place for that process (including liquid sertraline). I am aware it is a marathon not a sprint but after the long and difficult journey I have already had with paroxetine withdrawal it's really hard going through it all again! I take responsibility for not managing my second taper slowly enough, but it is still very tough at the moment.

 

I am taking fish oil and tentatively introducing magnesium, although I think I may be seeing some adverse reaction to that.

 

Like many others, I am finding this a very long and lonely journey, and thoughts about the wasted years and missed opportunities are hard to ignore when you can't distract yourself in any way. I do understand that is something I just have to deal with.

 

Best wishes

 

 

 

 

 

 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Administrator
On 9/21/2022 at 4:44 AM, Spenitate said:

also looking at options to work with a psychiatrist as I think my issues may need more in-depth handling.

 

As a rule, the "in depth handling" you might get from a psychiatrist is more drug treatment. Very few know anything about withdrawal or tapering. Is more drug treatment your intention?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment
9 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

As a rule, the "in depth handling" you might get from a psychiatrist is more drug treatment. Very few know anything about withdrawal or tapering. Is more drug treatment your intention?

 

Absolutely not! I desperately want to have these drugs out of my system. I just feel I am also in need of some wraparound support, which I suspect I am not going to find. I'm trying to find anything which can help me. I am extremely wary of psychiatry - but a friend suggested I could speak to someone about my issues and gauge whether they are able to engage with me on my terms. I can't pursue it right now as I'm too ill but it is an option I'm considering.

 

As you know it is almost impossible to find professionals who have an adequate understanding of withdrawal or tapering. It is one of the hardest parts of the condition, the lack of recognition.

 

 

 

 

 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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In a dark place today. Tingling in arms and extreme suicidal ideation. Fears this is just who I am now. Hopelessness about ever healing or having any kind of life once I have healed. Have written my notes. 

 

the loneliness of this condition is overwhelming. 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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  • Mentor

Anyone in withdrawal needs to build a personalised ‘toolkit’ of things they can rely on in difficult times. Not everyone has supportive family and/or friends, but it doesn’t mean you have to be alone in this. This website is a vital support stem for many. Keep posting on your thread, that way you’ll never be alone. 


On the terrible days I just made sure that I ate, took my medication/supplements, and waited until ‘tomorrow’.

 

Keep going @Spenitate.
 

 

Nothing I say or do is based on medical advice. I make my own choices based on intuition gained through individual research, and a lot of suffering. My intro
CURRENT MEDICATION:

1. Sertraline: 50mg October 2020; 100mg December 2020; 50mg April 2021; 75mg May 2021; 50mg 18 September 2021; big crash 6 December 2021; holding

Current dose: 50mg (Sep 2022)

2. Mirtazapine: 15mg November 2020;

Current dose: 15mg (Sep 2022)

 

PAST MEDICATION

1. Amitriptyline: 20mg Dec 2016 for epigastric pain; 10mg Dec 2017; 0mg Oct 2018 - no withdrawal symp.

 

SUPPLEMENTS: Magnesium Citrate;

LIFESTYLE: No alcohol, nicotine or caffeine

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Just now, Erimus said:

Anyone in withdrawal needs to build a personalised ‘toolkit’ of things they can rely on in difficult times. Not everyone has supportive family and/or friends, but it doesn’t mean you have to be alone in this. This website is a vital support stem for many. Keep posting on your thread, that way you’ll never be alone. 


On the terrible days I just made sure that I ate, took my medication/supplements, and waited until ‘tomorrow’.

 

Keep going @Spenitate.
 

 

Thank you Erimus, your kind message means an awful lot today. I am in a great deal of mental pain and like you (as mentioned in your thread) I have become very jaded, which is not something I ever wanted to be.

 

Do you have any suggestions of things for a 'toolkit' I could use? I'm really trying to build up my resources, it's just so hard.

 

2002 approx: Prescribed 30mg of Citalopram which made me instantly extremely ill including suicidal ideation and auditory hallucinations, discontinued in a few weeks and symptoms subsided.

2004 - 2010: Prescribed short bouts of Paroxetine (Paxil/Seroxat) with no noticeable side effects or withdrawal issues.

2010-2020: Prescribed 40mg Paroxetine for almost a decade, initially positive impact but over time noticed less effectiveness and increased side effects (constant sleeping/nightmares/night sweats, and weight gain).

2020: Tapered down from 40mg - 0mg in 2-3 weeks on doctor's advice. A few weeks later severe withdrawal symptoms began (suicidal ideation, rapid weight loss, hypothermia, etc.).
May 2020: Went back on 10mg of Paroxetine, tapering to 0mg over 2-3 months. Severe symptoms began again after dropping from 5mg to nothing on doctor's advice (so I could 'clear my system' to start Sertraline).
June 2020: Started on 50mg Sertraline to manage Paroxetine withdrawal on doctor's advice. New severe symptoms, worse than before (worst was suicidal ideation, but also extreme noise sensitivity, muscle cramps, stomach issues, etc.).

Early 2021: Increased Sertraline dosage from 50mg to 75mg in desperate hope it would relieve ongoing symptoms. It did not.

2021-2022: Began a gradual taper from 75mg down to 1.6mg of Sertraline, following advice given on this site (though on reflection still tapered too quickly). Severe recurrence of symptoms, now restabilising at 2mg and holding for now. 

 

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