Sleepless: unable to take medication

[Sleepless]

Hello, I’m new and needing assistance.  I was on paxil for many years and tapered slowly.  I was unable to stay off the meds.  I was put on paxil, then 20 mg cymbalta, then 12.5 mg sertraline.  All had to be stopped due to side effects.  I stopped taking sertraline after a fast taper in April or May this year.  It seems like I had every withdrawal symptom listed.  August was awful.  I had major anxiety, panic attacks, blood pressure spikes and insomnia.  I feel unstable.  I am having trouble doing things like going to the store due to anxiety.  My doctor has prescribed me liquid sertraline and I took 1mg today.  It triggered tachycardia.  I just don’t know what to do.

[Sleepless]

It’s been 20 hrs. since I took the 1 mg of sertraline.  I feel like I have slight vertigo.  I have patches of skin on my legs that burn every so often and I feel my anxiety/claustrophobia try to increase.  I guess I will not be able to reinstate.

[Gridley]

Welcome to SA, Sleepless.

 

To give members the best information, we ask them to summarize their medication history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-24 months particularly.

 

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.

 

It may be that some of what you've been experiencing with these drugs are side effects, some may be withdrawal (as from the fast taper of Sertraline in April, 2020), and some, like the 1mg Sertraline you took today, caused what is called immediate adverse reaction, which means the drugs are poison to your system  In any case, it appears you're a person whose system simply can't tolerate psychiatric drugs, and that's what your body is trying to tell you.

 

 

I have to leave the house now and will write more later, but in brief answer to your question, it does look like you won't be able to reinstate due to the reasons above.

[Sleepless]

I spoke with my therapist yesterday and told her that I thought I was having protracted withdrawals.  She asked me how long I had been off the medication and I told her 3 or 4 months.  She told me that I should be over the withdrawals by now.  🙄

[amstrong]

That's aggravating, I'm sorry. My withdrawals didn't start until 6 weeks off of sertraline, so I totally understand the frustration when a therapist or doc don't think it's from post WD. My timeline is very close to yours (ended meds June 1). I don't necessarily have any great advise, other than to take one day at a time. Try to implement omega 3s, magnesium glycinate, CBD, exercise and meditation. Those have been helping me with some anxiety relief and I've finally kicked the insomnia. Surround yourself with a solid and encouraging support system. You got this!

[Sleepless]

I have applied for disability for multiple medical issues.  If I didn’t need her paperwork for that, I would probably kick her to the curb.  I can find more helpful information/support on here and on you tube.  Oh well...   I did set my recovery back by taking the metformin and attempting to reinstate yesterday.  Hopefully that will ease up.  Once it does, I will attempt to introduce other items slowly.  I’m glad you are recovering.  I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.

[Gridley]

4 hours ago, Sleepless said:

I spoke with my therapist yesterday and told her that I thought I was having protracted withdrawals.  She asked me how long I had been off the medication and I told her 3 or 4 months.  She told me that I should be over the withdrawals by now.  🙄

"Should be over by now" - except it isn't.  Doctors get their information from the pharma companies.  It's not to the advantage of big pharma to admit there's protracted withdrawal.

 

What is withdrawal syndrome.

 

Daily Checklist of Antidepressant Withdrawal Symptoms (PDF) 

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

When we take psychiatric medications, the CNS (central nervous system) responds by making changes over the months and years we take the drug(s). When the medication is discontinued, the CNS has to undo all the changes it made. Rebuilding the neurotransmitter production and reactivating the receptor and transporter cells takes time -- during that rebuilding process symptoms occur.  

 

These explain the healing processreally well:

 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

Brain Remodelling 

 

We don't recommend a lot of supplements on SA, as many members report being sensitive to them due to our over-reactive nervous systems, but two supplements that we do recommend are magnesium and omega 3 (fish oil). Many people find these to be calming to the nervous system. 

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker 

 

Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil) 

 

Add in one at a time and at a low dose in case you do experience problems.

 

This is your Introduction topic, where you can ask questions and connect with other members.  We're glad you found your way here.

 

 

 

 

 

[Altostrata]

Hello, Sleepless.

 

When you were on Paxil 2001-2016, did you get adverse effects from it? What were they?

 

It appears when you went off, withdrawal sensitized your body to the other drugs. This hypersensitivity seems to be common when people get withdrawal syndrome. The repeated trials of the other drugs probably made this hypersensitivity worse. Do you also react to light, sound, heat, etc.?

 

Why were you taking vitamin B12 shots? How did they make you feel?

 

Is sleeplessness among your worst symptoms? What is your sleep pattern?

[Sleepless]

I believe that the Paxil stopped working.  So I did a slow taper by using a scale and weighing it.  I was not in the best of health so that may have played a part in not being able to stay off them.  I now react to heat, light and sound.  I have to sleep with a fan blowing on my face.  I have night sweats.  I’ve started limiting the amount of light in the home in the morning and increasing in gradually.  Sometimes multiple sounds overwhelm me and I have to put in my noise cancelling air pods.  I had to start taking B12 shots because I was too low.  My level was 178 and minimum was 230 or something like that (I would have to look for the exact number).  My first 2 daily injections of 1ml were fine.  My third one was awful.  I became anxious.  I couldn’t sit still and I kind of went incoherent.  I don’t know how to explain it.  So I stopped taking them for a while.  Then I tried to decrease the dosage by half.  I still had major anxiety approximately 2 hours after taking it.  I cannot even take a multivitamin without triggering anxiety.  It always starts approximately 2 hours after taking them.    My worst symptom is anxiety and tachycardia.  In August I was having many sleepless nights which consisted of sweating, anxiety and tachycardia.  I had one blood pressure spike of 195/129.  So that’s why they prescribed the atenolol.  I was getting maybe 2 hours sleep a night so that’s why I was prescribed diazepam.  Plus I was stressed because my husband had to spend 6 days in the hospital due to Covid.  Things slowly started getting better sleep wise until last week.  I took metformin for the first time due to failing a 5 hour glucose test.  I took 1/4 of a pill at supper and started having tachycardia.   Around 11pm, I woke up with massive anxiety and confusion.  I really thought I was gonna have to be committed.  So that left me unstable mentally.  So I tried to reinstate 1 mg of sertraline yesterday.  I now know that it’s not gonna work.  My psychiatrist basically said that I cannot take medicine.  So every morning I have tachycardia and anxiety.  I can’t go anywhere without having major anxiety.  I’ve also developed claustrophobia.  

[Sleepless]

Thinking back, I think I also stopped the paxil because I started having migraines with aura.  I kept getting different opinions and different short term medications for I.  Somehow I realized that they were related to the Paxil.  In August of 2011, I had my thyroid removed due to papillary cancer and underwent radiation.  I've never really been the same since.  

 

So now my thyroid medication has been changed from levothyroxine/liothyronine medications to straight levothyroxine.  The endo was hoping that the combination of the two would help me.  I was unable to take the liothyronine because it cause anxiety.  So I ended up being hypo.  So now my TSH will start to be suppressed more.  I'm not sure how this will affect withdrawals  This morning, I'm weak, shaky and had tachycardia again.   Since the end of July, I've lost 10 lbs.  I guess that's good, but not really the way I wanted to lose it.

[Sleepless]

Well...  I managed to trigger myself for the first time and recognize it.  I decided to ride my reclining bike for a short while.  I took it very slowly and only rode 1 mile.  I’ve done this numerous times.  After this time, I started to get a little dizzy, anxious and then noise started to overwhelm me.  So I put in my noise cancelling head phones and laid on the couch for a few minutes with my eyes closed, a fan on my face and did a few deep breathing exercises.  I then pulled out my word search book and did a few puzzles.  I find that doing them seems to change my focus.

[Sleepless]

I had a good day yesterday.  I was able to do a few strength training exercises.  I realize that I am horribly out of shape.  I feel like an invalid.  

 

Today has been a very bad day.  I don’t think it’s a window/wave or because I exercised.  My endo switched my thyroid medicine from 75 mcg generic levothyroxine to 88 mcg Synthroid.   I took my dose at 5:30 this morning and started having horrible anxiety symptoms around 8:00 am.  I used a little rub on magnesium to try and curb the anxiety.  This didn’t work.  So I took a little Benadryl.  I reduced the anxiety a tiny bit.  I dread taking it again tomorrow.

[Sleepless]

I’m dealing with lots of anxiety tonight.  😔

[Sleepless]

So last night I had to take a chip of diazepam and atenolol to get the anxiety, muscle spasms and tachycardia under control.  I had slight anxiety throughout the night.  This morning, I took my normal generic levothyroxine instead of the Synthroid @ 5:30am.  I had anxiety around the 2.5 hour mark, but not as bad as yesterday.  I was able to go back to sleep and slept about an hour this morning.  I struggled with taking a shower and morning chores due to tachycardia and I had diarrhea.  I seem to be a tad bit better this afternoon.  I still have slight anxiety and some dizziness.

[Sleepless]

My anxiety is now interfering with me being able to do basic things like take my pet to the vet and go to doctor appts.  I’ve never had this problem before.  Any suggestions to help with this?  I feel like I’m becoming homebound.

[Sleepless]

My anxiety wouldn’t let me take my pet into the vet.  I came home and cried.  I am so weepy.  I’m having a bad day.  How can I survive this for months on end?

[Gridley]

1 hour ago, Sleepless said:

My anxiety is now interfering with me being able to do basic things like take my pet to the vet and go to doctor appts.  I’ve never had this problem before.  Any suggestions to help with this?  I feel like I’m becoming homebound.

Here are some links to help with anxiety.  I've found the restorative yoga pose (the last link) to be very helpful with anxiety.

 

Audio:  How to Recover from Anxiety - Dr Claire Weekes
 

VIDEO:  Peace from Nervous Suffering - Claire Weekes (1 hour) (http://sendvid.com/vgquc1dg)
 

Anxiety Stuff - all kinds of stuff about anxiety attacks and things that help …

 

10 minute Restorative Yoga for Relaxation | Up the wall

 

 

 

[Hanna72]

Hi @Sleepless

I am sorry to hear about your anxiety. I know how you feel, and it’s the worst feeling. 
Gridley gave you links to look at and read, because it’s very important to learn new coping skills for our anxiety. It takes work to reform our thinking patterns. I would highly recommend reading up on everything you can about working through the anxiety. 
Don’t be to hard on yourself. You might want to take tiny steps in the beginning. Every step in the right direction counts. Focus on the step but not the staircase. And be proud of all the accomplishments you make along the way, all the tiny ones too.
I have had to explore what works for me. It takes time to find your own tools and you will figure out along the way what works best for you.

Success doesn’t come from what we do occasionally 

it comes from what we do consistently 

 

My best wishes to you🙏


 

[Sleepless]

Thank you @Hanna72 and @Gridley.  I will attempt to go through the links above and research them.  One step at a time is all I can seem to manage right now.

[Sleepless]

Really struggling...

 

10/2

4:30am:  woke up anxious.  Used phone in bed to occupy mind.
5:00am:  did alternate nostril breathing.
5:20am:  took levothyroxine 93 mcg approximately.
6:30am:  massive amount of anxiety.  Used 1 pump of rub on magnesium oil.
6:45am: ate breakfast 
7:00am:  lay back down with heart palpitations.
7:40am: loose stool
7:45am:  did an anxiety meditation.  Still having heart palpitations.
8:00am: loose stool
8:40am:  still anxious.  No heart palpitations now.
10:00am:  got a shower.  Felt bursts of normal.
11:00am: burst of slight anxiety.
11:45am:  sat outside for a while.  Developed brain fog.
12:15pm:  ate lunch
1:10pm:  laid down for a nap 
1:29pm:  woke up with anxiety 
3:30pm: drove to store to get 2 items.  Came out and had heart palpitations.
4:45pm: noticed a lot of muscle tension around my shoulders and midsection below bra line.
5:30pm: had leftovers for supper.  I feel slightly normal.
9:25pm: heart palpitations when I lay down.
9:30pm:  in bed listening to sleep therapy

 

10/3

4:30am:  woke up anxious.  Used phone in bed to occupy mind.
5:00am:  did alternate nostril breathing.
5:20am:  took levothyroxine 93 mcg approximately.
6:30am:  massive amount of anxiety.  Used 1 pump of rub on magnesium oil.
6:45am: ate breakfast 
7:00am:  lay back down with heart palpitations.
7:40am: loose stool
7:45am:  did an anxiety meditation.  Still having heart palpitations.
8:00am: loose stool
8:40am:  still anxious.  No heart palpitations now.
10:00am:  got a shower.  Felt bursts of normal.
11:00am: burst of slight anxiety.
11:45am:  sat outside for a while.  Developed brain fog.
12:15pm:  ate lunch
1:10pm:  laid down for a nap 
1:29pm:  woke up with anxiety 
3:30pm: drove to store to get 2 items.  Came out and had heart palpitations.
4:45pm: noticed a lot of muscle tension around my shoulders and midsection below bra line.
5:30pm: had leftovers for supper.  I feel slightly normal.
9:25pm: heart palpitations when I lay down.
9:30pm:  in bed listening to sleep therapy

 

10/4

4:30am:  woke up anxious.  Used phone in bed to occupy mind.
5:00am:  did alternate nostril breathing.
5:20am:  took levothyroxine 93 mcg approximately.
6:30am:  massive amount of anxiety.  Used 1 pump of rub on magnesium oil.
6:45am: ate breakfast 
7:00am:  lay back down with heart palpitations.
7:40am: loose stool
7:45am:  did an anxiety meditation.  Still having heart palpitations.
8:00am: loose stool
8:40am:  still anxious.  No heart palpitations now.
10:00am:  got a shower.  Felt bursts of normal.
11:00am: burst of slight anxiety.
11:45am:  sat outside for a while.  Developed brain fog.
12:15pm:  ate lunch
1:10pm:  laid down for a nap 
1:29pm:  woke up with anxiety 
3:30pm: drove to store to get 2 items.  Came out and had heart palpitations.
4:45pm: noticed a lot of muscle tension around my shoulders and midsection below bra line.
5:30pm: had leftovers for supper.  I feel slightly normal.
9:25pm: heart palpitations when I lay down.
9:30pm:  in bed listening to sleep therapy

 

[Sleepless]

I feel so unstable today.  I feel like I’m cycling something different every hour.  😔

[Sleepless]

How does a person cope?  I don’t know how I will be able to manage WD for months much less years.

[rupa]

Hi

Hope,by this time, you and family negative with covid-19 .

Today I am diagnised with  papillary thyroid carnicoma.

With no TSH ,no t3,no t4 ....!  Is it possible?

Can I believe the needle biopsy result?

If yes

what is bethesda catagiry 6 ,shall I accept the treatment and medicines?

As ,I am not interested in any medication ,after my experience with risperidone and olanzapine.

Did you ever regret ,for getting treated for papillary thyroid.

What would you suggest?

 

Please reply.

 

 

[Sleepless]

5 hours ago, rupa said:

Hi

Hope,by this time, you and family negative with covid-19 .

Today I am diagnised with  papillary thyroid carnicoma.

With no TSH ,no t3,no t4 ....!  Is it possible?

Can I believe the needle biopsy result?

If yes

what is bethesda catagiry 6 ,shall I accept the treatment and medicines?

As ,I am not interested in any medication ,after my experience with risperidone and olanzapine.

Did you ever regret ,for getting treated for papillary thyroid.

What would you suggest?

 

Please reply.

 

 

Hello Rupa,

We are Covid-19 free at this time. Thank goodness.  I’m sorry you have been diagnosed with thyroid cancer.  I cannot tell you what to decide.  I can only tell you my story.  In 2011, I had a slight sore throat.  Within 2 weeks, I had something swell at the base of my throat.  I assumed that it was an enlarged lymph node.  So I went to the doctor and they treated me for an infection.  After I finished the medication, the swelling remained.  So an ultrasound was completed.  It showed that I had an enlarged tumor on my thyroid.  So I went to an endocrinologist.  He completed a biopsy and checked my thyroid levels.  My biopsy came back negative and my levels were ok. So I was told to come back in a few months for another ultrasound.  Before it was time to have my 2nd ultrasound, I developed another sore throat on the same side as the enlarged area.  So I was sent to a surgeon per my request.  I believed that it was cancer.  My sister had also had papillary thyroid cancer.  Her’s had spread to some lymph nodes before it was caught.  My surgeon completed a cat scan and it showed that my thyroid had grown larger and I had some spots show up in my throat near my tonsils.  Due to the family history, I decided to have mine removed.  Once it was removed, pathology determined that my walnut size tumor was cancer.  I cannot say that I regret having it removed as my son was only 15 and he needed his mother.  The treatment wasn’t completely horrible and my thyroid levels stay fairly normal on levothyroxine.  I was not in WD at the time of my surgery,  So I do not know how it will affect you if you are in WD.  If it is cancer and you do not have it removed, I believe that it can spread to other organs.  I hope my story helps you make you decision.

[Sleepless]

I feel like today is my 5 millionth day in purgatory.

[Lucy1983]

Sleepless I hope you get some relief very soon. 

[Sleepless]

7 minutes ago, Lucy1983 said:

Sleepless I hope you get some relief very soon. 

Thank you.  Are you only on Benadryl now?

[Lucy1983]

Sleepless I haven't started my Ambien 5mg taper. I think about it but am just not ready.  

[rupa]

16 hours ago, Sleepless said:

Hello Rupa,

We are Covid-19 free at this time. Thank goodness.  I’m sorry you have been diagnosed with thyroid cancer.  I cannot tell you what to decide.  I can only tell you my story.  In 2011, I had a slight sore throat.  Within 2 weeks, I had something swell at the base of my throat.  I assumed that it was an enlarged lymph node.  So I went to the doctor and they treated me for an infection.  After I finished the medication, the swelling remained.  So an ultrasound was completed.  It showed that I had an enlarged tumor on my thyroid.  So I went to an endocrinologist.  He completed a biopsy and checked my thyroid levels.  My biopsy came back negative and my levels were ok. So I was told to come back in a few months for another ultrasound.  Before it was time to have my 2nd ultrasound, I developed another sore throat on the same side as the enlarged area.  So I was sent to a surgeon per my request.  I believed that it was cancer.  My sister had also had papillary thyroid cancer.  Her’s had spread to some lymph nodes before it was caught.  My surgeon completed a cat scan and it showed that my thyroid had grown larger and I had some spots show up in my throat near my tonsils.  Due to the family history, I decided to have mine removed.  Once it was removed, pathology determined that my walnut size tumor was cancer.  I cannot say that I regret having it removed as my son was only 15 and he needed his mother.  The treatment wasn’t completely horrible and my thyroid levels stay fairly normal on levothyroxine.  I was not in WD at the time of my surgery,  So I do not know how it will affect you if you are in WD.  If it is cancer and you do not have it removed, I believe that it can spread to other organs.  I hope my story helps you make you decision.

Yes,

Your kind reply helps alot.

You did your best ,considering your family.

Your family needs you.

I appreciate your brave effort.

These days I am feeling,I am not in WD any more.

As I can sleep deep.

Epitite is all good.

I am in need to ask one more question.

Is levothyroxine safe to take?

Any drug effects like brain medication?

My experience with brain medication is horrible.

So I am fearing to take any medication into my body.

But there is no other way now.

Is the levothyroxine bearable ?

Thank you.

 

[Sleepless]

3 hours ago, rupa said:

Yes,

Your kind reply helps alot.

You did your best ,considering your family.

Your family needs you.

I appreciate your brave effort.

These days I am feeling,I am not in WD any more.

As I can sleep deep.

Epitite is all good.

I am in need to ask one more question.

Is levothyroxine safe to take?

Any drug effects like brain medication?

My experience with brain medication is horrible.

So I am fearing to take any medication into my body.

But there is no other way now.

Is the levothyroxine bearable ?

Thank you.

 

I’m glad you are not suffering from WD now. 🙂

Levothyroxine is generally safe to take.  It’s classified as a synthetic hormone.  So it can affect your mood if your levels are not right.  I’ve not had any horrible issues with the medication.  Now each person is different.  If you decide to have your thyroid removed,  I hope all goes well for you.

[rupa]

11 hours ago, Sleepless said:

I’m glad you are not suffering from WD now. 🙂

Levothyroxine is generally safe to take.  It’s classified as a synthetic hormone.  So it can affect your mood if your levels are not right.  I’ve not had any horrible issues with the medication.  Now each person is different.  If you decide to have your thyroid removed,  I hope all goes well for you.

Thank you.

My best wishes to your family.

God Bless you.

[Sleepless]

So today I am having anxiety, chills and internal shaking.  Could this be from the Atenolol I took yesterday?

[Sleepless]

I’ve been off sertraline for about 5 months.  I feel worse now than I did 1 month ago.  How much lower and non-functioning can someone get?  I had a window yesterday, but I don’t know if it’s from the Atenolol I took on 10/9.  Today I’m weepy and anxious.  I’m developing agoraphobia.  I’ve never had this in my life.  It’s just been a lot to handle lately.

[Sleepless]

Not much has changed since my last post.  I’m still having awful symptoms daily:

anxiety, brain fog, internal shaking, agoraphobia, depression, skin burning and so on.  😔

[Hanna72]

@Sleepless

I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling.

The waves do sometimes feel like never ending story.
What has helped me when in those waves is to think of them as a helping tool in my healing process. In order for our brains and bodies to recover, unfortunately we have to go through those waves. Our bodies are saying, now it’s time for more healing and in my own experience usually a wonderful window awaits me. 

A bright window awaits you, just give it time and hang in there.

 

Sending you good vibes your way and may you experience a relief soon.

 

 

[Sleepless]

3 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

@Sleepless

I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling.

The waves do sometimes feel like never ending story.
What has helped me when in those waves is to think of them as a helping tool in my healing process. In order for our brains and bodies to recover, unfortunately we have to go through those waves. Our bodies are saying, now it’s time for more healing and in my own experience usually a wonderful window awaits me. 

A bright window awaits you, just give it time and hang in there.

 

Sending you good vibes your way and may you experience a relief soon.

 

 

Thank you for your response.  I will try to reference it during my dark times.