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ang

☼ ang: help and confidence needed

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UnfoldingSky

Well in my family no history of any mental conditions. Except my father suicided (who knows benzos were new in those days?). Most people know someone who

has suicided, so no I no longer believe I have bad genetics...?? Out of 9 grandkids I have two with ADHD (bull, they are normal hyperactive boys), one with something else, and another that my daughter was told would be severely disabled, due to an early cxt scan (Annie is absolutely fine) - I cant remember what they said was wrong with her. I am so, so damn grateful, all my kids have resisted these damn drugs, and none of my grandkids are on any of this poison either. makes me wonder if my 9 grandkids will grow up to be the only sane ones on this planet in the future?

 

I am sorry about your father, that must have been so difficult for you.

 

I am glad that your kids and grandkids were spared the drugs, it seems where I live most kids now are on them. 


I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions.

 

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ang

I have realised a few others, as my sister (out of 6 siblings), also was on AD way before me. Others in extended family not on anything.

 

So... both have scarring on our necks (looks like we have had bad acne)..white blotches all over the natural skin tanning.

I have broken capillaries over my face, whatever that is called, put on weight,

I have had constant ear problems (water in the ears?),I never recognised that one, but found that link through readings, and references from this site.

swollen fingers and legs,

scabby scalp, and itching blemishes on my face.

Nice to realise why my eyes have suddenly become so dry and sore (WD)...

High blood pressure, and heading towards diabetes. Now much improved... high blood pressure miraculously disappeared.

I also had chronic pain in my left shoulder, neck, subsiding with the WD. Wasn't a strain or anything after all.

Feel hot and cold at the same time, ie inability to fully regulate my body temperature, is improving. Racing heartbeat for no reason, now improving.

 

But the weirdest? I smelled differently on effexor, I didn't notice it, but my family could no longer stand the smell of me. Another sister gave me body spray, and when I asked, she was honest, I stank! Never had that problem before effexor. Awfully hard on a partner, when you stink. One of my own sons, couldn't come close to me. I have actually noticed that is improving, I no longer stink.... that is how I can describe it...

And snoring. That has stopped. Taste of lead in my mouth, gone. Taste is still adjusting. Oh, trying to kiss someone with lead mouth agghhh! Hope I get a chance to try out my kissing skills again sometime! :) I still drink, so it wasnt the alcohol causing my snoring at all. Will give up the alcohol later.... too hard to do everything, all at once.

Eyesight is improving, fuzzziness comes and goes, no longer need the magnifying glasses I had to purchase.

 

Before 35 (before AD), I had none of these things....I was fit, healthy active.

 

No one else in my extended family has any of the symptoms my sister and I (on AD , have) All fit and healthy. Nothing hereditary at all. Sister is on different AD than I was on... and I rarely see her, if ever. She lives a long way away.

 

Other side effects people have would be appreciated, if people can list them, oh damn getting all hot with the flu again. :)

I am alive! And grateful.

 

Oh sorry for getting off the track. :) Trying to stop my ramblings, and stick to helpful stuff.

 

Thank you


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Thankyou! Had a crap day today, but hope to drag myself mountain climbing with kids and grandkids tomorrow .... I feel needed, as I may only be as fast as the 5 year old, damn he will probably leave me behind too :)


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Nothing that you are saying is irrelevant.  If it is important to you it is relevant.  I am not in a position to give advice.  I am simply another mother going through withdrawals and trying to survive it.  Just wanted to chime in and say hello.  I think having children at home that depend on you makes the journey of withdrawal and coming off the meds that much harder.  Some days I don't want to get out of bed but I have to get the kids up and ready for school so I have no choice.  This journey is unpredictable but many have become med free and I believe it is possible.  Keep fighting.

I remember when I first went on Zoloft, and the doc gave me a video tape to watch. A mum with her two teenage boys, saying how the medication has helped her, and now she can cope with her life, and her family. OMG. I wonder if this lady was real (probably an actor), if she was real, I wonder where she is now?

1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Managed two days mountain climbing. The 5 year old was way ahead, got back with the rest of the family way before me. Was nice my two sons encouraged me tomake it to the top, even though they knew they would have a 2 hour wait for me in the carpark.

 

Since then I just seem to be having a major downer. Have to close my new shop (I dont have the energy to work), and anyway closing the shop means I have my brain back, I was losing more than I was making, so glad to pull out (hopefully) in time, and if I can sell shop fittings, hopefully not left with too many debts.

 

I have been losing money all the years I was on effexor, and after 10 years there isn't anything left. My gradiose ideas have suddenly gone, about time.

 

I suppose the doc would say I have gone into depression, as off my med. About losing everything I owned? Must be the bipolar. I know differently. Guess I always did, but those damn drugs, start off as one for something minor, then end up on so many, even physical health deteriorates.

 

I try and think how lucky I am, I never had a heart attack on them, and all the other horrible physical side effects they cause that lead to physical ilness. Just so hard as people just seem to think I am suddenly "lazy".

 

All I want to talk about with family is the evils of psychiatric meds, and they are sick of hearing it.

 

I know I am not depressed, I know I am reasonably happy. How do I motivate myself? How do I retrain my brain?

 

I am battling after suffering all this for only four weeks, will be so damn hard to tolerate it for two years.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

If I feel exhausted and lie down during the day, I just have horrific thinking, so I have to stay upridht during the day.

I have cut down to 30mg Seroquol to sleep at night.

Cut out the Tegretol.

Cut out alcohol.

Two days ago, I tried seroquol as an extra in the morning, hoping for sedated motivation, and added 50mg tegretol. I am hoping (as that did not work, just sedated me), that my horrific feelings today and yesterday will pass.

Hoping for an improvement by Monday, as I have to move stuff from my shop, and have to sell as much shop fittings etc as I can, to minismise financial losses.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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mammaP

Ang it is important to maintain stability when in withdrawal. Changing things and going up and 

down with doses of the other drugs will slow down the healing, the brain and nervous system need stability.

You say you cut out tegretol then said that you increased it. Your sig says 25mg of seroquel but your post says 

50mg?  Withdrawal is a nightmare and we all want to do something, anything that will help but most of the time

the best thing to do is nothing. Just stick to the same doses of the same drugs at the same times every day so

that you can get stable. Once you are stable and over this you can taper from the others if that is what you want

to do.

 I know what you mean, talking non stop about these drugs and psychiatrists is something we all do! We have

been so badly affected and it is so much a part of our lives that we just can't shut up!

Try and look at something else, anything that can take your mind off the subject for a little while and give you

something else to talk about. I love pinterest, if you don't know it then you must take a look, it's a great distraction. 


**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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ang

The efficacy of ZOLOFT in maintaining an antidepressant response for up to 44 weeks following 8 weeks of open-label acute treatment (52 weeks total) was demonstrated in a placebo-controlled trial. The usefulness of the drug in patients receiving ZOLOFT for extended periods should be reevaluated periodically (see Clinical Trials under CLINICAL PHARMACOLOGY).

 

this is something I found out about Zoloft. So from this I am assuming after 8 weeks treatment, it takes 44 weeks to get out of my body? I was on this one for two years. 44 weeks is a long time, so I sadly, assume I will get worse before I get better.

 

Yes, I did play around with medication, in a panic to see if it would help, it didn't.

 

The seroquol only seems to sedate me. I only seem to need 25mg at night to allow me to sleep. If I take any during the day now, I just want to sleep, feels OK, but not that useful in getting well.

 

So my choices are to stick to that, 25mg Seroquol only and try and ride this out for at least a few months (I can get out of bed eventually, shower, dress, and make it to TV or computer,eat something, but that is about all). I need to sort out my shop and close it down, god give me strength.

 

Or go back on the damn stuff, somehow, which I dont want to do, as this stuff has destroyed my life. Now I find out MDD means a suicide attempt. Well I got diagnoses, in 15 minutes by a doctor, who had never met me before, I had not been despressed for more than 2 damn days, and never, ever have contemplated suicide (but I understand how after being on this stuff, and the despair, anything may be possible). This doctor was a not very nice person, to do this to me. I trusted him, when no-one else in the medical profession did, because my sister trusted him. Now I hate her. How horrible of me.

 

So hard to try and think clearly.

 

My signature says 25mg Seroquol, 50mg tegretol. I need to look up more about tegretol, and see if I should still take that. That is a mood stabiliser. Anyones input, very, very welcome here.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Tegretol combined with Seroquol. (quetiapine)

 

Interactions..................Major Highly clinically significant. Avoid combinations; the risk of the interaction outweighs the benefit.

 

Aren't doctors great?

 

First doc put me on 50mg day of tegretol with SSRI.

 

Next doc changes medication to effexor with quetiapine.(to stop the horrific dreaming associated with effexor)..... however, tells me to increase tegretolas that is not a theraputic dose, and I am now (of course, as one seems to develop on this stuff) apparently now a bipolar. So stick to lots of tegretol, as it stops mood swings (whether these mood swings happen every month or once a lifetime, apparently?)...

 

Now I read that if you are on quetiapine, it interreacts, and patients need to updose the quetiapine by, wait for it, 5 times the original dose.

 

What a cocktail I was on..... thank god I am still alive. And I haven't finished the inter reactions list yet.

 

How dare they put people on drugs, with unknown reactions, what guinea pigs we are? How obscene. And now to find out, I was never ever MDD at all?


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Am suffering, but alive. I can eat sleep, about all I can do. My son is getting angry with me. Maybe he would be better off with his dad, not my choice, his. Feel so damn poorly, but hope the anger, the resilence I had years ago, pre AD will re surface.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Has anyone else considered that SSRIs were based on truth serum stuff from the Vietnam era? So we all go on truth serum, tell everyone our problems, and get well (bit like feeling better after a tell all with a priest if you are Catholic)

 

Except when some people told the truth (under the influence of these drugs), no one believed them anyway.

 

Thoughts out there very appreciated.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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Frustrated

Oh dear I am so sorry your son is upset.  I have three kids at home and I know how hard it is to try and keep up with them.  I even find myself at times biting my tongue so I don't get unecessarily angry at them.  The withdrawals make it very hard to be a mother and run the house. My little one who is four knows that sometimes I have trouble doing things because My legs hurt.  That is all she needs to know and it is sufficient for a 4 yr old.  She will say "are you being slow because your legs hurt?"  Bless her.  Do the best you can do.  I hope he comes to understand and your situation gets a little better.  You are not alone.


2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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ang

After this morning,  I could not get out of bed,  I am starting to think I need to reinstate, and start all over again slowly.  But I have been off the Zoloft now for about 5 months.  I am actually out of bed, and feeling 10% brighter.  Just so hard, I feel like I have chronic fatigue, mixed in with anxiety.  And the fear that it will get worse, and I will not be able to cope,and then it takes 3 weeks for medication to wrok, if it does?

My son is 17 he went fishing today, beautiful day, but I could not get out of bed, couldnt go,  just feel like hiding.

Seems you cut down your Paxil about the same time and way I cut down my zoloft.   And you say reinstatement didn't work?


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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luv2knit

Just read your earlier post, Ang. If it really does take 44 weeks for 8 weeks of Zoloft to get out of the body, then I might as well hang it up now :( I am 60 years old, and am off 5 months after taking for 20 years. My only hope after reading that is that I have been communicating off and on for the past couple of months with a guy that took it for 6 or 7 years (I don't remember which). He CT'd off of 100 mg. after his idiot doctor thought he had Serotonin Syndrome. His withdrawal, which included akathisia (like me), lasted a total of 22 months. Scary stuff, though. Wishing you much healing in the New Year.


Zoloft 100 mg. daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since Oct. 1994 / Synthroid 88 mcg. daily / Supplements: Neptune Krill Oil-1,000 mg. twice daily/Astaxanthin 10 mg. twice daily/Ubiquinol 100 mg. twice daily (These 3 have allowed me to discontinue (approved by doctor) bp meds I was on. Calcium Citrate 500 mg. daily/Vitamin D3 2,400 iu daily/K2 (MK7) 100 mcg daily (osteopenia and fam. hist. of severe osteoporosis). Stress B Complex (1/2 dose)/Quercetin (for allergies/asthma)/Magnesium (400 mg. oral glycinate and about 50 mg. magnesium chloride spray oil a day, divided throughout day).

Tapered Zoloft about 6 wks. Totally off since the end of July (25-29, 2014). 3 wks. vertigo at end of taper, then 3-4 wks. OK, followed by withdrawal symptoms increasing in severity (nausea, gastric disturbances, loss of appetite, insomnia, restlessness, jitters, anxiety, agitation--jumping out of my skin--possible akathisia?) Seem to have paradoxical reactions to everything new, even Vitamin C. Severity of akathisia comes and goes, but is constant to some degree. Hard to leave house, and cannot be home alone. (Retired)

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Frustrated

The reinstatement seems to have helped some with the mental torture like intrusive thoughts. They seem to be coming and going in small spurts instead of being constant. I am hoping that pattern will improve or at the very least stay the same. The physical pain is still there. It comes and goes as well. I am not sure if the small dose has made improvements there. Hard to tell. I do know that I was on 1.2 mg for a few weeks and I was getting headaches so I dropped to .9mg. No more headaches just my normal neck tension. I hate that I have to taper that .9mg now but it is worth it if it continues to help with the mental issues. If you plan to try reinstatement please start VERY small.


2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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ang

1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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Rhiannon

Nice, ang, thanks. A few days ago I was talking to a couple of friends about this and they were shocked to hear that the chemical imbalance thing is not true and never has been shown to be true. I'm still not even sure they believed me when I told them. Here in the USA it's all over the commercials on TV every day and people are just convinced it's absolute truth.


Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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ang

Thanks for keeping an eye on me and my  thread  Rhi, frustrated and luv2knit.

 

I managed to go in to the shop for around for an hour :)... Not achieving much.  I am so disappointed in my lack of strength.  I need to do stuff there, to cut my financial losses. I need to be able to cook and eat, which is lacking at the moment. If I could go for a walk once a day, would be an improvement.  I just can't do these things at present.

 

If I could somehow reinstate, to get me thru the next few months, while I sort out my responsibilities, then I could go back to the way I feel now, with a few more plans in place for support.........

any ideas?

 

So, I believe I am stable, but unable to function. I do not believe I will feel any worse......Any physical symptoms I can cope with.  It is just my lack of motivation, strength that are the real problem.  I believe my physical health is much improved on that when I was on this stuff, especially the effexor was the worst, but killed my brain, so I thought it was helping, when it was destroying me.

 

I see the doc tomorrow.   I am thinking I will have to try reinstating some Zoloft, it seems the least horrific of all the stuff I have been on, and was the last SSRI I was on.  I only took the Mirtazapam for a short while, and that seems so horrific, dont want to consider reinstating any of that.

 

I was on 100mg of Zoloft ......   I think I went on  that amount thinking that doubling a previous dose of that years ago would help more, ie more is better, theory, that thankfully this site has put me straight about.  More is not always better.  So I actually think a proper maintenance dose would have been 50 mg.

 

If I reinstate, how low a dose should I try,  I have been completely off the stuff for about 5-6 months after a 4 month taper (I think)....  I have some small scales somewhere, I would need to find these, for weighing out small amounts of chemicals for horticulture.  Zoloft only comes in 50mg?  What do I do?  Crush the tablets and then weight out a small amount?  How long would it be until I should notice an effect, positive or negative?  A week?

 

1 gram seems so small, would this be enough for a trial, I have stabilized on 50mg seroquol and two glasses of wine a day, at present time.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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luv2knit

I can't advise on reinstatement, as it had been too long since my rapid taper for me to want to risk going that route. I am sending you best wishes with whatever you decide, though.


Zoloft 100 mg. daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since Oct. 1994 / Synthroid 88 mcg. daily / Supplements: Neptune Krill Oil-1,000 mg. twice daily/Astaxanthin 10 mg. twice daily/Ubiquinol 100 mg. twice daily (These 3 have allowed me to discontinue (approved by doctor) bp meds I was on. Calcium Citrate 500 mg. daily/Vitamin D3 2,400 iu daily/K2 (MK7) 100 mcg daily (osteopenia and fam. hist. of severe osteoporosis). Stress B Complex (1/2 dose)/Quercetin (for allergies/asthma)/Magnesium (400 mg. oral glycinate and about 50 mg. magnesium chloride spray oil a day, divided throughout day).

Tapered Zoloft about 6 wks. Totally off since the end of July (25-29, 2014). 3 wks. vertigo at end of taper, then 3-4 wks. OK, followed by withdrawal symptoms increasing in severity (nausea, gastric disturbances, loss of appetite, insomnia, restlessness, jitters, anxiety, agitation--jumping out of my skin--possible akathisia?) Seem to have paradoxical reactions to everything new, even Vitamin C. Severity of akathisia comes and goes, but is constant to some degree. Hard to leave house, and cannot be home alone. (Retired)

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Petunia
If I reinstate, how low a dose should I try,  I have been completely off the stuff for about 5-6 months after a 4 month taper (I think)....  I have some small scales somewhere, I would need to find these, for weighing out small amounts of chemicals for horticulture.  Zoloft only comes in 50mg?  What do I do?  Crush the tablets and then weight out a small amount?  How long would it be until I should notice an effect, positive or negative?  A week?

 

1 gram seems so small, would this be enough for a trial, I have stabilized on 50mg seroquol and two glasses of wine a day, at present time.

 

Because you have been off so long, its a long shot that reinstatement will work, it could possibly make you feel worse, if you decide to try, I suggest no more than 1mg - 2mg

 

these topics should answer all your questions.

About reinstating and stabilizing to stop withdrawal symptoms 

How to cut up tablets or pills

Using a digital scale to measure doses

 

 


I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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ang

Hi Petu, thankyou so much, am considering my options.

 

Doc recomends Citalopram, dont know what dose, but can taper more easily, being a liquid.  He is only a gp but his comments re Dr Booth

 

 "ahh the psych who believed in high doses of drugs"...Yes, this Dr Booth doc long since bolted.

 

I think I was his arrogant prize, he tamed a non believer, who was  mensa material,  with the help of his star patient, my damn sister, Wendy ..  (she has decided to never get off the damn drugs), too damn hard....... buggar. (she convinced me they are safe and non addictive, not like benzos? Told me how wonderful she felt, when she got rid of all the bricks, in her brick wall, or all the cotton wool that was smothering her... and everything was greener than green, and the sky was bluer than ever... (obviously on a drug high, been there too)...

 

I didn't even drink or smoke, and never ever suicidal, buggar, so I cant just give up, not in my damn makeup.....buggar........... Now look at the mess this arrogant doc, and a patient in love with him (my sister, in her dreams)... left behind.

 

Anyhow, time to focus.....

 

Not sure if I could cut the Zoloft down to 1mg, and a bad reaction, will be the nail in my coffin.

 

My son (who has grown up way beyond his years, is 17),  said why bring in something new.  like in Australia  his quote

"they brought in the cane toad, to kill a little beetle"     it didn't work.......   so everything in desperation, we try something else, and it gets worse and worse.

 

I been off 6 months (I think, in my muddled brain).

Good signs:

 

The skin crawling of bugs is great, to me feels like an all over massage.  Seriously.

 

The doc did an ecg, my heart can tolerate Seroquol, so 50mg a night OK.  I can sleep, but wake up with horrors, but they pass.  Some days I have a window of an hour, hopefully eventually I will be able to use this to advantage to cook a meal, or clean.

 

Getting over all the guilt feelings.    Loss of finances, loss of everything, those damn guilt feelings, not rational, I know that now.  Been through that one before.

 

Thinking of the future, a good sign, hope to drag my arse to do psychology this year......   reckon there will be a chance of a job in this area, more of us every day.  I may not be able to cook, clean, walk, but I do enjoy study, and the companionship.

 

I am still drinking too much, like a sort of habitual relief, after 4.00   I know more than two glasses makes me feel worse in the morning... But damn I need that relief at the present time.

 

My son bought me a sports drink, as it gets him going, no effect... on me.

 

Hard to believe first thing in the morning things will improve.  If my sons help to close my shop, I will happily vegetate, as long as things dont get worse.  I been throught the horrors before, from an out of control drug cocktial and trials,     but not long term...  I try to bring myself to remember, and this is easy compared to those....   I survived those, I will survive, I just need to remind myself, I am actually typing on the computer, still asking for help and support...  ie I am surviving at present.

 

The fear that things will get worse, is gone, thank goodness.  And things have been worse before, and I survivied.

 

Thankyou for supporting me... kGod bless you all

 

Ang


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

I have been watching six feet under, a present from one son, the whole series.  First lot of episodes, was too close, too overwhelming, now I am actually enjoying watching a few episodes at night... I can focus on it, and I feel that now Ï am watching a tv show"... from a distance, so that is an improvement.

 

I try to recognise every minute improvement.  I love having my damaged brain back, I can no realise I need to actually be in charge of finances, I realise I have to budget for food.  A good sign.  No more grandiose schemes.,  A good sign.

 

And reading that 15 kids out of 130 on a trial of a drug, attempted suicide, when they never attempted this before, and none in the control group did, and they corrupted the real results...... and this SSRI got passed for kids, how obscene.  so my next gratefullness

 

Noone of my kids on the ****

 

My sister, all of them on the **** bar one. Out of five kids      Yes, results?  Devastating....  One in permanent care.... ah, must be the illegal drugs, not the legal ones... buggar.  Buggar the lies.... and she will never ever get off the stuff.

 

Problem being, eventually none work, so they add all sorts of other cocktails... now my doc says the only way to get a Seroquol script is if I have a diagnosis of schizophrenia or manic depression, but he looked me in the eye and said do you think you have these,  I said truthfully NO....   never have.... so now I know why that damn psych told me I have bipolar, and I agreed, to get the damn drugs...and he could be the prizewinner of a non believer.  Stuff it.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Yes, my first zoloft was freebies, I went to get the script, wasn't available in W Australia, doc gave me more freebies, isn't that sick, obvious trial freebies from a drug company.

 

Same with damn effexor, freebies from the cupboard.   

 

Diagnosis?  Non existent.  Except I filled out one questionaire once at a doctor my sister took me too.  And took drugs.  How horrific, now everyone is on this stuff, and we wonder why other countries dont like USA big pharma?  Stopping marijuana imports, stopping heroin imports, they gotta flog their own.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Citalopram = Celexa = forerunner to Zoloft.  Is a liquid so easier to taper.     Would anyone recommend here, should I take Celexa ( a new drug, to me,  I think, but I have been put on some involuntarily that have had horrific effects), or try the zoloft after being off it for 5 months?  And try to crush the zoloft down to a small amount.

 

Or do nothing?

 

I feel awful, mostly just lack of enjoyment of anything. Can not cook, clean, battle to shower msyelf.

 

However, my day seems to have fallen into a pattern.  I wake at 5.00 am  can not get up until  10.30  but I am comfortable.  Previously felt like a constant nightmare whenever I was awake.  All I do when up is read this site, and research on google, watch tv in the evening.  Then tablet, get hungry, eat something, then bed, and the whole cycle repeats.  Like I am lost in some sort of unreality. Head feels like a brick, like I have slept too long, but not a headache.  Flu symptoms have gone.  The bugs on my skin feel like a nice massage. (Luckily).  I did some washing yesterday, and if I follow yesterdays pattern, I feel a bit better in the afternoon, hope I can bring it in and put it away, at least.  Hopefully I can do some ironing, always found that kind of therapeutic.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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btdt

You know what is odd some of my days maybe even most are a lot like yours and I have been drug free for 7 years... I don't know what that means if anything... I am glad the worst of it has passed now... I hope.  It just dawned on me reading your idea of taking something else to treat... no joy... I think is how you put it.  Is no joy an illness.... 

Gee I just don't know.  I wonder have I settled for this when there is more have I been here... so long I don't see anything else or expect anything different?  You pose an interesting question... I for one will be interested in the answers I don't have one as I think of this state as healed compared to where I was. I get that there are likely more things going on than you said like the massage ect. I know less than nothing about seroquol or tapering really so I am keeping my mouth shut as I know I have no clue.  

I do wish you well with your recovery and I also wonder if you have any other symptoms?  Do you know what the seroquol adds to the mix? 


WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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ang

Seroquol was the last drug I was on, so when I got WD and couldnt sleep (with the horrors thrown in), I tried 25mg, then settled on 50mg.  At that dose it is a sedative.  I read up on the tegretol, should I keep that or not?  Well seroquol needs to be five times higher to have the same effect, if taken with tegretol.  So decision, no tegretol.

 

My problem at present, is I do not have the required "life spirit"to move everything out of my new shop, and landlord is not very understanding.  I need enough strength to do just that, the rest I could cope with.

Impossible to do even simple things, like send back the eftpos machine, but I can do one task daily... If the shop were closed and cleared out.  Just found out the landlord is showing people into my shop, never asked me.  All my goods are still there, feel like I been violated.  One lady just rang, to ask me to go to shop and unlock it, so she could retrieve the keys she locked inside?

 

Is this legal?  I am presently paying the rent on the shop.  I actually feel that the landlord is in the midst of this horrible AD addiction, as he is making as little logical sense as I was making no logical sense on the stuff.   

 

I like my brain back, dont want to go back on the stuff, but how much can one bear?  It is only now I realise my shop was not a goer, that I sold things too cheaply, that I had gradiose ideas for years on the effexor ****.  I dont want to go back there.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

So my dilemma?  Go on a new drug, celexa, (citalopram).....  cause it is liquid and easy to taper?  But I dont know, even a small dose will be the nail in my coffin, if it doesnt work.  At the moment I am stabilized enough to survive. I sleep enough, eat enough, and survivie.  My brain is working again, but not enough to motivate me.

 

I like having my brain.  Of all the drugs I been on effexor was the killer, mind, spirit and soul.  And I am glad I realise the damage it did to my life while on it.  That is its success, while on it you just dont know how stupid and reckless, and arrogant it makes you.  I am glad I am no longer reckless, arrogant, and mildly manic all the time.  I also think all these SSRIs are almost as bad.  And benzos and tricyclics even worse.

 

Like a cycling nightmare, I want out of, because eventually none damn well work.  I didnt realise effexor hadnt been working for years, but doesnt make the WD any easier, weird that.  

 

I am glad I went back on zoloft after the crash after trying to give up effexor  "when life was good"...  I now realise on effexor, all I was doing was creating stress for myself, and then coping with it with the effexor.  Drug from hell.

 

Any advice out there?  Has anyone been off SSRIs or stuff for over 5 months then managed to try a nug drug, at low dose, to see if it helps?  I am not sure I am brave enough, might be that nail in the coffin for me.  And no I never ever been suicidal, dammit!

 

I drink too much, I think but when I say a bottle a night people ask of schotch or whisky, nah damn wine, but I never drant before this effexor crap.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

You know what is odd some of my days maybe even most are a lot like yours and I have been drug free for 7 years... I don't know what that means if anything... I am glad the worst of it has passed now... I hope.  It just dawned on me reading your idea of taking something else to treat... no joy... I think is how you put it.  Is no joy an illness.... 

Gee I just don't know.  I wonder have I settled for this when there is more have I been here... so long I don't see anything else or expect anything different?  You pose an interesting question... I for one will be interested in the answers I don't have one as I think of this state as healed compared to where I was. I get that there are likely more things going on than you said like the massage ect. I know less than nothing about seroquol or tapering really so I am keeping my mouth shut as I know I have no clue.  

I do wish you well with your recovery and I also wonder if you have any other symptoms?  Do you know what the seroquol adds to the mix? 

So are you happy you are drug free?  Are there benefits to your life now?   I actually tried to clean muck off my floor today, so that is an improvement.  Wehen you say after being off now for 7 "most days are like mine"..you gotta be kidding me?  Then why not go back on a damn drug, ??? It must be better in your world than mine?  Or why would I be  trying?

 

You said "the worst of it is over"... well what is the worst of it?  If you feel no joy for anything "most days?" Give me some hope here, why do you feel "the worst of it is over"?  I need to know whether I should battle on, or start taking stuff again.  Any insights are very, very appreciated.   

 

I am 55 years old, the drugs have cost me 10 years of my life, my self esteem, my mind.  I want to enjoy my grandkids sometime in the future, I want to find another companion sometime in the future, I want to go for walks again, and knit and crochet and create, sometime in the future?  Is it possible?


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

btdt.  I have read your signature.  Effexor is the drug from hell.  I didnt know I had been going thru effexor withdrawal for 18 months - 2 years, while on another drug, Zoloft.  Zoloft was enough to keep me alive.  Took me a 100mg tablet of seroquol to drag myself out of bed, and took up studies at tafe... ie technical school... Strange how the body knows if you stay like that, you will die, the strength of the human spirit.    what a cocktail I was on, post effexor....   and Mirtazipine, the rocket fuel, apparently.  I reckon the doc supervising me then was good.  I initially went to him cause I was going to quit effexor, and needed backup, well, how could he tell me what he knew about effexor?  I was very naive.  He had no advice to give me,, probably just waiting to collect the pieces from the fallout. 

 

I think you are suffering long and hard, post effexor.   Please keep posting.

 

My recommendation (as I am neither a doctor, nor anything), is from effexor, go to something else.  Anything that you can taper. (Not paxil, from what I read).... Zoloft, or another of these drugs    one that is what I call "soft one".  Short half life, not long half life......

 

They are all evil, but not as evil as the devils tic tacs  effexor.  So taper to another drug, Stay on that for at least two years, then taper the softer drug, very slowly....  The two years plus on the other drug, should get you over the worst of the fallout from effexor.  Is it because I just realised effexor has another initial?  not just an SSRI?  probably.  That last bit it the acronym, changed my personality, and I didnt know it.  But we all go to these psychs, in despair, usually suffering WD from another drug, as I did.  Survivial mode, take anything to relieve the pain.  Thats how they make their money...........................  we need to keep working, why?  eventually it catches up with you, and you just cant work.  Wish I had just stayed in bed,  that first time, instead of the medicating to "be normal".  Crap.  Olden days we supported each other emotionally.  I went to a womens refuge at one stage, on nothing for damn 10 years, so upset  she said äh have to get you to a doc real quick"...  I bolted, where was the compassion and support.  Like a quick drug fix will be fine... No such thing.

 

So people out there who felt wonderful, new job, new business... look rationally if you are on effexor... see your accountant.  is it really making money?  If you buy a horse and two more dogs, are you just being manic, and adding to your stress, I was.  Blaming everything on a nasty husband, a horrible bank, nah, they cop some of the blame, but recklessness, if you can get off effexor, and limp onto another drug do it, while you still have some of your old personality, and a bit of money left.  xx

 

Sorry I am rambling, but am glad I have a record of my journey.  Thankyou to this website.  So damn honest.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang
I really think, after 7 years, if I stay off this stuff, most of the WD will be attributed to the effexor.    You have done so well,  please keep posting.  I been off effexor now 2+ damn years, but I really think that Nor whatever uptake inhibitor destroyed me, I dont like to think that these drugs change your personality, but it did.  Do you have any finances left, people on venlaxafine? ?  I lost all mine,  all $500,000 post divorce I had.  It fried my brain.

I kept taking on more challenges (ie stress), more idiot ideas of making money, wish I had just retired to my bed for two damn years........... all the while finding something to blame it on.  Death of my father at 6.  Damn I never thought about that till AD. Blaming my horrible husband (had coped with him for 32 years before venlazafine).... Finding stuff to be stressed about, and blaming that, real weird.   If you still have financials, anyone post effexor, venlaxafine   you are doing well.

 

If you are on it, trust your accountant, and get over the arrogance that you dont need to trust your accountant.xxxxxxx

1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

You know what is odd some of my days maybe even most are a lot like yours and I have been drug free for 7 years... I don't know what that means if anything... I am glad the worst of it has passed now... I hope.  It just dawned on me reading your idea of taking something else to treat... no joy... I think is how you put it.  Is no joy an illness.... 

Gee I just don't know.  I wonder have I settled for this when there is more have I been here... so long I don't see anything else or expect anything different?  You pose an interesting question... I for one will be interested in the answers I don't have one as I think of this state as healed compared to where I was. I get that there are likely more things going on than you said like the massage ect. I know less than nothing about seroquol or tapering really so I am keeping my mouth shut as I know I have no clue.  

I do wish you well with your recovery and I also wonder if you have any other symptoms?  Do you know what the seroquol adds to the mix? 

I dont want to go on a new drug for no joy, can cope with that, need to go on a new drug to cope with chronic fatigue,  so I have enough energy, to sort out my life, so I can vegetate, and get well.  Wish so much I had read this website before, I would never have been "manic enough"to take on a shopfront.  so anyway well done to this website, it is my honest lifeline at present.  Thinking if I lose everything in the shop, so be it... the drugs caused my financial ruin.  All these "prescribed, good drugs" blah, just another addiction, I was conned.  As we all have been.  I hope I eventually get well enough, to attempt, in a small way to expose this drugged up fraud.   I read the people going onto the stuff, how great it makes them feel, as it did with me.  But then, it hits, the drugs become intolerable, they put an N in somewhere, that changes a personality.   And we all die 25 years early, unless we are damn strong enough to kick the habit.  Anyone who reads this, go for the advice here.  We are addicts, and we were told it was safe.  What immoral crap.  And Australia medical pays for these drugs, I am now on a disability support pension, because of these drugs, but we are addicted, and as addicts can not give up these "non addictive drugs" The biggest lie on earth, that one.Thankyou USA.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

So here I am.  Brain ok, actually.  Realising I have to budget, finally.

Relaise I lost everything due to effexor addiction.

Luckily I had a very fit body before AD at 35.  My body is coping despite the drugs over the years.  But once given a psych diagnosis, after 8 years off, you say you are tired, damn antisphycotics, the cycle rears its ugly head.  I can do it, I can do it, I can do it, my mantra.

A son who is 17, and supports me, emotionally... well as well as a 17 year old can.  (ie pizza money, :)  luv him to bits)  He has his full licence now, so if I aint so great, he gets around.

He doesnt care if the place is a mess, as long as he has food.  ie piza money, at least he can drive and collect it :)  still got a minute sense of humour  good sign.:)  

On a disability support pension, and a nice cheap rent home (homeswest wa)... no longer homeless.

I have realised how many people are kind when I tell them I am sick, regardless of diagnosis, at my age, I realise the empathy of humanity.

So lucky, I have such support.  I am financially ruined, but have my brain back.

I eat and sleep OK, can not handle stress, have no energy, but I still have emotion.

I keep thinking of a young girl, in a locked ward with me once, who never recovered, and died after ECT...... how evil this psychiatry is.

RIP dear lady...


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

The gp doc I am seeing now, onc, long ago, when my newborn son was dying with a majr heart defect said "what is the worst that can happen".  I said "he will die", that realisation helped me, so much, as my son died.  Thankyou Zoloft and Tegretol, well done.

 

So now I am off SSRIs and nasty other thing effexor, what is the worst that can happen? I lose everything?  Damn, I have nothing left. so I dont care.

I have people who love me still, I have grandkids, I have a brain back (finally), I have a son still with me.... damn it, what is the worst that can happen?

 

Nothing, everything bad as already happened thanks to these drugs.  And damn apparently 1 in 10 pregnant women in USA are on this ****?

 

Being on the pill while pregnat, creates female male babies, now what have we got to look forward to in the future?  More deformed babies, that somehow survive with surgery.  Poor little buggars/

 

My baby didnt survbive, but my friends did, same medication as me.  Only half a heart, that child has had to endure 8 surgeries, and her mum still in a blitz of AD, dope, alcohol....she is the feral I was while on this stuff, like house a mess.....  (no I never smoked, or took dope, or such)... but the similarities are, she has not escaped this AD nightmare, I hope I have.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

I wrote a whole heap of stuff, I now realise is quite irrelevant.  

So glad my kids arent on this rubbish.  Dont worry, the docs tried and tried, so glad they and I said NO.

 

One sticks in my mind, a brain person, as my daughter had osteomyletis of the jaw, telling her (after a 4 hour journey to see this so called specialist.... that her father had suicided so she needed AD... wtf? her father was alive and well?).  Handing out lollies, as my daughter obviously was depressed, and her jaw pain, and mountainous swelling of her jaw, was imagined?.  Thank god, she never took them.  Anyway this specialist was more focussed on her sick young daughter in the next room with the flu.  Buggar.  But they are lollies, according to devils tic tacs, and big pharma.

 

My sisters kids are, they all stuffed.  The eldest OK, the other 4 all stuffed.  My sister believes in genetic problems... then why are all the other 4 in our family siblings and their kids OK?   Wake up.....

 

I am grateful.  I need to keep doing this as a mantra, my kids are OK, all the surviving four.  Poor Steven, well died due to Zoloft, Tegretol....buggar, I can cope.

 

I worry about the one that I was on these drugs when I conceived, is he coping now?  Is he a normal healthy person now?  He is different, that is all I can say.

 

I am grateful, if you are suffering reach out to others, say you are seriously unwell, dont need to go into details, say Chronic fatique anything.  And if you mention psychiatric problems, the ones on these drugs, are the ones who will be your worst enemies.

 

Now I got my brain back, I recognise these people, but I can do nothing, like just I have stopped preaching, trying to heal the world of this chemical garbage, I just wait for the fallout, and hope I can help them then, in their journey.


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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ang

Help me anyone, please talk to me...   I need support... I need anyones advice.  I need to know I am not alone x


1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression.  Serotonin syndrome, oh yes!  seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol.

Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly)  pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby).  98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.
2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout....  Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol,   and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.
Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg  seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg  tegretol 400mg.  Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.
Mid 15 ....   75mg  seroquel,  3 x 1800mg SJW  2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave
5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x  SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW
15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::   28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::;  18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump.

23/9  3mg.....,  27/9 0mg.  Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg.............  LIGHTBULB MOMENT,  I have  MTHFR 2x mutations.  CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it.

Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues.

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Frustrated

You are definitely not alone, I just don't have any words to make any of this better.  They did put my son on this devilish medicine before I knew the dangers.  Now I am trying to taper him slowly down.  He is 14 and had swollen throat glands and a growth on his thyroid and felt sick.  The doc kept saying it isn't the meds.  IDIOT!  I switched him off the extended release and now he is down to 45 mg of the regular seroquel.  He misses alot of school because of all of this and I am afraid he will fail his first semester of grade 9.  On top of that I have been in withdrawal for 6 months now.  So I understand the trauma of it all believe me.  And I am very angry at the doctor who is suppose to be HELPING us, but instead caused my son and I both alot of pain, and now denies it is the medication.


2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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