Ali Posted March 22, 2016 Author Share Posted March 22, 2016 I so wanted a coffee today out with my cousin. But I knew if I did it could mean trouble for me. I am thinking of you right now, Ali as I am cursing at the TV telling Ted Cruz to shut the F*** up. It's not even political. I hate his voice! Leahy, that made me laugh. Angry again today and so avoiding people and conversations. Even the thought of talking to the doctor is getting me wound up, so I have cheekily put in a request for a repeat prescription of another drug and in it included the lexapro oral drops. I just put a note, "as before", hoping that they won't query it. I might just get away with it if it's not my named GP who sees it. The games we have to play... <p>Several periods of depression starting in teens. 2010- 2014 escitalopram 20mgs. tapered to 5mgApril 2011- December 2011 seroquel2012-2014 don't know exact dates! 2014/15 Lamactil 200mg. 2015 lamactil 150mg. (Several attempts at coming off escitalopram and lamactil). March 2015 tapered to 37.5mg lamactil- Reinstated. July- Aug 2015 tapered off 5mg escitalopram. Dose reinstated Nov 2015. 7/1/16 Lamactil 137.5mg. Escitalopram 5mg; 24/3/16 lamactil 125mg; 20/4/16 escitalopram 4.5mg. 6/5 escit 4mg. 5/6/16 escit 3.6mg; 16/7/16 escit 3.5mg. 27/7/16 lamactil 112.5mg 18/8/16 escit 3.2mg 10/9/16 escit 3mg 16/9/16 lamactil 100mg 11/10/16 lamactil 112.5mg 28/10/16 escit 2.9mg 4/11/16 escit 2.8mg 10/11/16 lamactil 125mg 11/11/16 escit 2.7mg. 25/11/16 escit 2.4mg 10/12/16 escit 2mg 1/1/17 escit 1.7mg 17/1/17 escit 1.5mg 4/2/17 escit 1.4 19/2/17 escit 1.3mg 13/3/17 escit 1.2mg 22/3/17 escit 1mg. 4/5/17 escit 1.15mg 5/5/17 turmeric 800mg Link to comment
leahy Posted March 22, 2016 Share Posted March 22, 2016 I love when I make you laugh, Ali! I don't want to talk to people today, either. Most days are like that. The thought of having to talk to people is unbearable. No phone calls for me. 2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg 2015 Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April Rem 22.5, May Rem 30 xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 2016 Jan Rem 20 xanax 2, Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg Link to comment
AliG Posted March 22, 2016 Share Posted March 22, 2016 You made me laugh , too Leahy ! You often do . I agree. No phone calls for me either ! LOL. There are some days , where being alone is preferable. Ali . Doctors are just drug dealers. So are psychiatrists . The more we stay away from them , the better off, we will be ! We have to become our own health advocates, through diet/ exercise / yoga/ meditation / sleep / sun / love & education ! Ali Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
leahy Posted March 22, 2016 Share Posted March 22, 2016 Oh my goodness! We are having so much fun here in our worlds of silence!! Since going through wd, I have taken my Macbook back THREE times to repair a "humming" sound. The noise was driving me crazy! No one heard it. Finally one of those nice Apple guys said he heard it too. And so it was fixed. Thank God! I was so relieved. AliG, this is the best advice I've seen all day: "Doctors are just drug dealers. So are psychiatrists . The more we stay away from them , the better off, we will be ! We have to become our own health advocates, through diet/ exercise / yoga/ meditation / sleep / sun / love & education !" 2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg 2015 Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April Rem 22.5, May Rem 30 xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 2016 Jan Rem 20 xanax 2, Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg Link to comment
AliG Posted March 22, 2016 Share Posted March 22, 2016 Thanks Leahy ! I have a certain anger , " brewing " ! It makes me wary of the whole medical profession . If you follow , the money , it will lead to the truth of what has happened medically in your country and mine . It is a disgrace ! Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
leahy Posted March 22, 2016 Share Posted March 22, 2016 I'm right there with you on that! 2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg 2015 Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April Rem 22.5, May Rem 30 xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 2016 Jan Rem 20 xanax 2, Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg Link to comment
Hibari Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 Me too! The way people are prescribed medication without looking at them as a whole person is outrageous. The fact that people are prescribed medication to handle the symptoms as opposed to the root issues, is mind boggling. 9/2013-4/2014: After moms death, was prescribed a series of meds for short periods of time that didn't work. Zoloft, Lexapro, Nortriptyline, Liquid Prozac, Cymbalta. 1/2014-9/2014. Clonzapam: Given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs 1/2015-4 2017 Remeron: 41.25 -0.025mgs 7/2015-11/2018 Lamictal: 200mgs-0.05 mgs Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping. 3/28/2019 -2/5/ 2021 Clonazapam: 0.625mgs-.00115 Med Free July 27th, 2022**Severe Setback due to surgery/ anesthesia. 9/7/22-10/4/22 Trazadone 50-100mgs for sleep, 10/13/22-11/13/22 Trazadone 1 mg to stabilize 10/4/22-11/20/22 Remeron 7.5mgs (for sleep doesn't work) 11/20/22 7.3 - 12/31/22 6.3 2023: 1/18/23 6.1 - 6/6/23 3.6 6/16 3.4 6/28 3.0 7/12 2.7 7/28 2.5 8/11 2.2 8/23 2.0 9/5 1.8 9/16 1.6 9/30 1.4 10/13 1.2 10/26 1.0 11/9 0.8 11/22 0.6 12/6 0.4 12/23 0.2. 2024 1/4/24 Remeron/Mirtazapine free Additional Support: Armour Thyroid 75mgs, Magnesium Glycinate 300-500mgs, L-theanine Link to comment
Ali Posted March 23, 2016 Author Share Posted March 23, 2016 Today my anger has turned into sadness and I just want to take to bed. It scares me that this is how I used to feel pre-meds, most of the time. It's like I'm back in my twenties, although unlike them, I can't take to bed straight after work and rely on pasta and sauce every night because of the children. I'm trying to show them constructive ways to deal with pain, or at least to avoid my tendency to hide from the world and opt out. If this is my base line, I know I'm happier on the meds, when the lexapro worked that is. I could interact with people easily, smile, be sociable, be patient, kind etc. Now I am just negative in some way, be it anger, sadness, frustration, impatience, the list goes on. So I wonder why I'm doing this, living so miserably. The answer is that I'm now too stubborn to go back onto something from any pharmaceutical company. But does that mean it's the right decision? Maybe I'm naturally depressive and things won't look up for me. I think, AliG, you mentioned dysthymia. I wonder if that's me, too. Has anyone taken St John's wort? At least it's natural... <p>Several periods of depression starting in teens. 2010- 2014 escitalopram 20mgs. tapered to 5mgApril 2011- December 2011 seroquel2012-2014 don't know exact dates! 2014/15 Lamactil 200mg. 2015 lamactil 150mg. (Several attempts at coming off escitalopram and lamactil). March 2015 tapered to 37.5mg lamactil- Reinstated. July- Aug 2015 tapered off 5mg escitalopram. Dose reinstated Nov 2015. 7/1/16 Lamactil 137.5mg. Escitalopram 5mg; 24/3/16 lamactil 125mg; 20/4/16 escitalopram 4.5mg. 6/5 escit 4mg. 5/6/16 escit 3.6mg; 16/7/16 escit 3.5mg. 27/7/16 lamactil 112.5mg 18/8/16 escit 3.2mg 10/9/16 escit 3mg 16/9/16 lamactil 100mg 11/10/16 lamactil 112.5mg 28/10/16 escit 2.9mg 4/11/16 escit 2.8mg 10/11/16 lamactil 125mg 11/11/16 escit 2.7mg. 25/11/16 escit 2.4mg 10/12/16 escit 2mg 1/1/17 escit 1.7mg 17/1/17 escit 1.5mg 4/2/17 escit 1.4 19/2/17 escit 1.3mg 13/3/17 escit 1.2mg 22/3/17 escit 1mg. 4/5/17 escit 1.15mg 5/5/17 turmeric 800mg Link to comment
leahy Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 I have actually taken St. John's Wort. Many, many years ago. But I remember I found myself skipping across the basement to do laundry. I realized that neither laundry not basement were anything to be happily skipping for. That's when I decided it worked. Ah, but then I completely forgot about it until now when you asked the question. 2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg 2015 Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April Rem 22.5, May Rem 30 xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 2016 Jan Rem 20 xanax 2, Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg Link to comment
Ali Posted March 23, 2016 Author Share Posted March 23, 2016 I would quite happily skip across a basement to do laundry or anything else as mundane. Your doctor would have thought you were too high! What do you think of me giving it a go? I'm tempted to try but unsure how it will mix into the cocktail? There must be some safe alternatives out there? Maybe that's wishful thinking. I always stumble across a vitamin, or herbal supplement and hope it'll be the thing, and then it does diddly squat. What is wrong with my brain? <p>Several periods of depression starting in teens. 2010- 2014 escitalopram 20mgs. tapered to 5mgApril 2011- December 2011 seroquel2012-2014 don't know exact dates! 2014/15 Lamactil 200mg. 2015 lamactil 150mg. (Several attempts at coming off escitalopram and lamactil). March 2015 tapered to 37.5mg lamactil- Reinstated. July- Aug 2015 tapered off 5mg escitalopram. Dose reinstated Nov 2015. 7/1/16 Lamactil 137.5mg. Escitalopram 5mg; 24/3/16 lamactil 125mg; 20/4/16 escitalopram 4.5mg. 6/5 escit 4mg. 5/6/16 escit 3.6mg; 16/7/16 escit 3.5mg. 27/7/16 lamactil 112.5mg 18/8/16 escit 3.2mg 10/9/16 escit 3mg 16/9/16 lamactil 100mg 11/10/16 lamactil 112.5mg 28/10/16 escit 2.9mg 4/11/16 escit 2.8mg 10/11/16 lamactil 125mg 11/11/16 escit 2.7mg. 25/11/16 escit 2.4mg 10/12/16 escit 2mg 1/1/17 escit 1.7mg 17/1/17 escit 1.5mg 4/2/17 escit 1.4 19/2/17 escit 1.3mg 13/3/17 escit 1.2mg 22/3/17 escit 1mg. 4/5/17 escit 1.15mg 5/5/17 turmeric 800mg Link to comment
leahy Posted March 23, 2016 Share Posted March 23, 2016 I think mixing SJW with another serotonin med could be problematic. As Alto would say "It confuses things." I took 5HTP once. Here's part of my post: Posted 19 June 2015 - 02:57 PM Today I walked to town for breakfast to get some gentle exercise and food. On the way back I passed by the nail salon that I go to and it wasn't there. I walked up and down the sidewalk 2 or 3 times. J. Nail was gone. Perplexed by this I walked around back and saw the back door of J. Nail with a CLOSED sign hanging on the door. Well I guess they suddenly closed and moved. A woman approached coming to get her nails done at J. Nail. They're gone I said and explained what just happened. I asked if she wanted to walk around to the front and see. She did. We walked to the front of the salon and it WAS still there. I was shocked, surprised, embarrassed. I think the woman thought I was crazy. What happened to me? Does anyone have any insights about this? Am I that confused? It feels like something a drunk person would do. 2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg 2015 Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April Rem 22.5, May Rem 30 xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 2016 Jan Rem 20 xanax 2, Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Fresh Posted March 24, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 24, 2016 Ali , try reading the thread on SJW here http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/652-st-johns-wort-hypericum-perforatum/?hl=%2Bjohns+%2Bwort Leahy's correct , it's dangerous to add SJW. If you really want to try a supplement , go carefully through the Symptoms and Self Care section and read up on a few options. 1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg 2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months. July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months. Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg. October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive. March 2016 , 21mg Link to comment
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