Heath: Lexapro taper plan introduction

[Heath]

@FeralCatmanI pray as we all do this will pass soon. 
the waking in panic lasted about 4 or 5 months maybe 6 . A family member and dr said this is how it also heals after a heart attack. In phases (anxiety and crying)

what did you do to help with the crying phases?

Edited September 3, 2023 by Heath

[Heath]

I had about a 2 week window in august.
So the panic waking anytime anywhere, in morning or nap went away. That had lasted around 5 or 6 months. 

Then the weird crying feeling in august.
 

yesterday the crying feeling stopped and internal tensing nervous anxiety started. Legs and but tensing and releasing. 
 

There are no thoughts bringing on crying or nervous anxiety. It happens starting mid morning to afternoon evening. 
 

these feelings bring on intrusive thoughts. I’m trying to let them fly on by. 

 

I seem to be sensitive to any small stress. 
 

today didn’t want to get out of bed, late for work. Anxiety started at work more. In stomach and throat. Kept going through the motions and working. 
 

If you haven’t yet try the calm app for guided meditation. 
 

 

[Heath]

Can anyone relate to these?

Part of withdrawal process?

 

A pain or feeling in body like a sore ankle after excercise or blurry eye vision from pollen and then thoughts go to worse case ? 
 

friend at work talking about retiring, then your thoughts go to oh my gosh what am I going to do how am I going to do it?

 

co worker talking negative about something for 5 minutes then anxiety builds in chest ?

 

wake up and just lay in bed , don’t want to get up ?

 

anxiety comes on for no reason ?

 

on hyper alert for anything that comes up ? 

 

just going through the motions not interested in things? 
 

weekends are worse ?
 

all the above in early day and gone in evening?

 

 

 

Edited September 9, 2023 by Heath

[FeralCatman]

I can answer that for you in one simple word

 

YUP

 

It comes and goes. Seems to get less intense as time goes by.

[Heath]

@FeralCatman

thank you for encouraging !

you know how the low dark times are and the doubt and inner nervousness. 
 Yea say a heart attack!

 

 

Edited September 9, 2023 by Heath

[Happy2Heal]

Ditto what Feralcatman said

it's all common stuff in withdrawal

Lexapro is a tough drug to get off of. 
I was on it for way longer than I wanted to be; tried to get off it after 4yrs on it and that didn't go well, kept trying for years after that, not knowing ANYthing about withdrawal always went too fast

 

and even when I did know about WD I still didn't fully understand and stupidly jumped off at way too high a dose

 

I am so glad to see that you're going slowly! 

very sorry about your heart attack and all the other stresses in your life

It's fantastic how well you've been doing. Seriously! maybe your friends co workers and family don't get it but we do

And for what you are dealing with, you are a ROCK STAR 

 

 

I'm assuming you're holding on your lexapro for now, right?

good move!!

 

about pain, I am not supposed to take celebrex (but I sometimes do) and I needed to find ways to deal with my bone on bone knee arthritis

 

I started turmeric about a month ago, I may never know if it's helping however

because I also started taking oral hyalaronic acid pills roughly at the same time

 

but I do know one strange but wonderful thing that has helped my knee pain so much it almost feels like a miracle:
BERRIES! I eat strawberries, blueberries, black berries as often as I can. WHen they are no longer in season I will get frz ones

It only took a week to see results and there was a week where I ran out of berries and the pain came back so I know it's the berries

or can be reasonably sure, I guess, I didn't do a formal proper scientific study with a control group and all that jazz  LOL 

 

so I hope you like berries and I hope if you try it, that you'll see some improvement from them!

I imagine any berry will work so choose the ones you like

 

 

[Happy2Heal]

forgot to add- this is where I first learned about trying berries

 

https://nutritionfacts.org/video/berries-for-inflammation-and-osteoarthritis-treatment/

 

 

and more:  https://nutritionfacts.org/topics/berries/

Edited September 9, 2023 by Happy2Heal

[Heath]

@Happy2Heal

thanks also for the encouragement!

thanks for info too! 

yes my wife puts raspberries and blackberries in snack bags and puts in freezer for me. We ran out a month or so ago. Got more. Lately I forget to get them because they are in freezer and lunch sack is in fridge.

 

I was taking turmeric but the new blood thinner and heart meds burnt stomach so had to stop in July. Got stomach calmed down so I started back on turmeric 2 weeks ago. Gradually working up dosage. I also take omega 3 . The inflammation is neck, low back and elbows. 

 

we had a good day ! Morning gym with son and a dunk in ice bath. Then Distraction - working outside all day did the trick. 

[FeralCatman]

My primary care doctor has a number of patients who successful use collagen supplementation to deal with arthritis type pain. There are many different types of collagen that people take for different reasons that come from different sources so it takes a little bit of research to figure out what is the right form for you to take. This may be an option for you as well. I haven't tried it myself yet and since my pain levels have gone down so much since getting off the Seroquel I don't actually feel the need to anymore however at some point I may experiment with it so I know it is an option.

[Heath]

@Happy2Heal

how many berries do you eat a day ?

 

It takes about 4 to 8 weeks to notice turmeric working. Take with food. Research max dose. I’m taking 2k atm. 

[Happy2Heal]

48 minutes ago, Heath said:

@Happy2Heal

how many berries do you eat a day ?

 

It takes about 4 to 8 weeks to notice turmeric working. Take with food. Research max dose. I’m taking 2k atm. 

 

well for the berries I try to make them last, supposedly just 5 strawberries is enough to make a difference but I can't eat just 5 strawberries!
when I get blackberries (6 oz pkg) I eat them all in one sitting

when I get strawberries with some restraint I can make the container last 2 days, not sure what the size is, just the normal sized one in the grocery store

when I get blueberries I try to make those last 2 days but don't always manage to do that either!

I can only do this when they are on sale, and now the summer sales are about over so I will have to restrain myself

I am thinking about buying Goji berries, those are dry and chewy and a bit tart, I had them and I like them

 

They are supposed to be one of the better berries for er, heart health I think?? I forget

 

I will look up my turmeric, I have been taking it for at least a month maybe longer

 

I didnt know to take with food at first and took on an empty stomach Boy was that a mistake! I had such pain and heartburn!!

I used to drink Golden milk with turmeric soy milk honey and pepper but I didnt really care for it that much

 

I think the hyaluronic acid is just kicking in now,It is def making a difference in my skin! not sure about my joints but my skin is suddenly moist instead of dry and if seems less fragile

 

 

I also try to avoid processed food and sugar but I am a sugar addict so that is hard

I feel SO much better if I keep my sugar intake low

and would probably be almost pain free if I could give it up completely

I'm working towards that

 

how have you been doing?

 

[Heath]

6 minutes ago, Happy2Heal said:

 

well for the berries I try to make them last, supposedly just 5 strawberries is enough to make a difference but I can't eat just 5 strawberries!
when I get blackberries (6 oz pkg) I eat them all in one sitting

when I get strawberries with some restraint I can make the container last 2 days, not sure what the size is, just the normal sized one in the grocery store

when I get blueberries I try to make those last 2 days but don't always manage to do that either!

I can only do this when they are on sale, and now the summer sales are about over so I will have to restrain myself

I am thinking about buying Goji berries, those are dry and chewy and a bit tart, I had them and I like them

 

They are supposed to be one of the better berries for er, heart health I think?? I forget

 

I will look up my turmeric, I have been taking it for at least a month maybe longer

 

I didnt know to take with food at first and took on an empty stomach Boy was that a mistake! I had such pain and heartburn!!

I used to drink Golden milk with turmeric soy milk honey and pepper but I didnt really care for it that much

 

I think the hyaluronic acid is just kicking in now,It is def making a difference in my skin! not sure about my joints but my skin is suddenly moist instead of dry and if seems less fragile

 

 

I also try to avoid processed food and sugar but I am a sugar addict so that is hard

I feel SO much better if I keep my sugar intake low

and would probably be almost pain free if I could give it up completely

I'm working towards that

 

how have you been doing?

 

real good yesterday! 

today is more inner nervousness type anxiety .  
neck and low back pain.
My wd anxious mind trying to tell me I can’t take an anti inflammatory again because of blood thinner like it’s permanent. Or in future. But it’s really just 7 more months. the real truth is I may never have to take a blood thinner again. 
we put off surgery many years ago with help of anti inflammatory. 
 

today Little Sunday blues

 

I had about 10 raspberries today.

[Heath]

On 9/10/2023 at 4:34 AM, FeralCatman said:

I haven't tried it myself yet and since my pain levels have gone down so much since getting off the Seroquel I don't actually feel the need to anymore however at some point I may experiment with it so I know it is an option.

FCM I have read here and figured that pains or inflammation in body hurt more during tapering antidepressants. 
Was this the case with you? And if so I am guessing this went away with you?
 

[itsalyssadood]

On 9/2/2023 at 6:02 PM, Heath said:

Did y’all have times where it was more crying or feeling of wanting to cry? 
 

and little things would set it off ?
 

it seems anxiety in morning and this cry feeling later? 
 

like I said the panic anxiety when waking fizzled away a month ago and then this cry thing started. Are these phases of healing? Headed in right direction? 

Hey Heath, I just read a few of your posts starting back months ago and I am tapering Lexapro also. Seems we have a lot of the same withdrawal symptoms. I am dealing with the morning anxiety and dread, it’s pretty awful. It does seem to get better in the eve unless some stressor sets me off. I’m sure you stayed it somewhere, but how long did that wave last for you? I noticed I’m getting crying spells at the end of the day while still having the morning anxiety. Fighting it all day just feels so exhausting to the point where I break down. Lexapro is awful, wish I never took this stuff. 

[Heath]

9 hours ago, itsalyssadood said:

Hey Heath, I just read a few of your posts starting back months ago and I am tapering Lexapro also. Seems we have a lot of the same withdrawal symptoms. I am dealing with the morning anxiety and dread, it’s pretty awful. It does seem to get better in the eve unless some stressor sets me off. I’m sure you stayed it somewhere, but how long did that wave last for you? I noticed I’m getting crying spells at the end of the day while still having the morning anxiety. Fighting it all day just feels so exhausting to the point where I break down. Lexapro is awful, wish I never took this stuff. 

I’m sorry you are struggling. yes that sounds like what I’m dealing with. It’s hard to get up knowing what we are going to feel but can’t lay in bed because of how bad that will feel.
 

After the last taper in may or june 2022 it took about 3 months to start feeling better and another 3 to be back to myself. That was with very little stress. It is a gradual thing. 
 

yes any kind of stress good or bad brings it all back on. That’s what I’m dealing with . It is very exhausting. It makes you doubt . It’s not just lexapro they all do it. Hang in there !
 

 

Edited September 13, 2023 by Heath

[itsalyssadood]

6 hours ago, Heath said:

I’m sorry you are struggling. yes that sounds like what I’m dealing with. It’s hard to get up knowing what we are going to feel but can’t lay in bed because of how bad that will feel.
 

After the last taper in may or june 2022 it took about 3 months to start feeling better and another 3 to be back to myself. That was with very little stress. It is a gradual thing. 
 

yes any kind of stress good or bad brings it all back on. That’s what I’m dealing with . It is very exhausting. It makes you doubt . It’s not just lexapro they all do it. Hang in there !
 

 

100 percent agree with the good or bad stress, it’s literally any and all stress can break me out into a spiral of anxiety and dread! 
 

I am glad you’re finally feeling better. Windows and waves are so real! We got this. 

[Heath]

@itsalyssadood

After getting through last year dark place symptoms and feeling better Covid got us and wd symptoms started again January 23 then a heart attack may 23 , major life change, so I am going through the wd symptoms and probably other things too atm Not myself yet. But I believe I am heading in rt direction, Yes we got this 💪

[itsalyssadood]

On 9/13/2023 at 12:38 PM, Heath said:

@itsalyssadood

After getting through last year dark place symptoms and feeling better Covid got us and wd symptoms started again January 23 then a heart attack may 23 , major life change, so I am going through the wd symptoms and probably other things too atm Not myself yet. But I believe I am heading in rt direction, Yes we got this 💪

You’ve been through so much this year! I’m glad you’re on this site and are going in the right direction. ♥️ I hope things continue to get better for you as the days go on. 

[Happy2Heal]

On 9/13/2023 at 3:38 PM, Heath said:

But I believe I am heading in rt direction, Yes we got this 💪

yep you do!

 

you're doing great!!! 

🌞

[Heath]

So I had lots of stomach pain back in may and June after starting all the heart meds. I stopped the turmeric in July because it was the only thing I could stop taking and started Prilosec and stomach healed up, no more heart burn.
 

Well eased back into the turmeric for back and neck inflammation after 2 1/2 months . And After 2 weeks stomach irritation and stomach pain came back. So now neck , back and stomach pain again plus anxiety. Stopped the turmeric which I took for a few years never had a problem with it until the blood thinner and aspirin. I guess blood thinner is to irritating for stomach . Dr started me on carafate for stomach. It’s hard for me to not think about back surgery. Cannot sit 5 or 10 minutes and people have to drive me on longer than 20 minutes distances.

 

Worst case thoughts come in early day. Early evening more calm and positive outlook. 
The doubt again that this is wd and recovery will happen. 
It’s so hard to explain to someone that wd causes all this after a year on same dose. 
 

have a tooth feeling and a treadmill test Thursday and about 3 leg vein procedures coming up. All these drs are stressful. 

 

I do write this in morning hours during the inner nervousness. 

I am very grateful that I sleep about 6- 7 hrs with very small interruptions. 
I am grateful my feet are healing right on up! 
And had a few windows here and there about a week ago! I think pain and stomach issues and thoughts of future brought wave back maybe. Stress. 

 

So It’s so hard to get up in the morning despite the advice to get up. 
why?

could it be ?

morning anxiety?

feel safer?

habit?

dont want to face the world ?

normally extra rest would help not in wd

sadness?

physical pain? 
stress?

 

even though you know you will feel better if you get up you lay there, you just want to lay there why?

 

you hit the snooze and snuggle then after a snooze or too and a few panic awaking then thoughts of any kind start rolling in. Negative thoughts of past or maybe future. Then the guilt of snoozing sets in. Regret. 

this happens to me about twice a week. 
 

can anyone relate ? 
Any tips for the will to get up?

[Heath]

Well things change daily. Nervousness early in the days and calm in afternoons if all goes well. 
 

cry for no reason or something small. Seems the crying is more now than it was. Less panic type anxiety.

 

The weekends have been pretty good for 3 or 4 weeks. Staying busy in shop with son . Distraction. Watching funny shows in evenings during week. 

Been involved in work even though I feel it in my chest and neck. I can laugh even though anxiety is in my chest. 
been having food cravings. Excercise is not as consistent now days. 
I have been speaking in mornings work meetings. 
 

Im having memory thoughts. I see a date on anything and then stomach and neck flips. Like a sad anxiety feeling. Want to cry. Looking through old papers to throw away you know. I was in the shop the other night looking at some of my grandfathers tools then it hit me like a spike. Ok then I see more things my fathers skill saw he gave me. Than my uncles level. I had to get out of there. I’ve had these feelings before during other tapers years ago and don’t believe I’ve never had them any other time in my life. 
 

Sunday blues are happening nowadays. 
 

So wife and son have started doing something  good on Sunday in which I am unable to do. Daughter is at work. The last 2 sundays I have been a wreck. I would just start crying. I try to get busy. Today this Sunday I been a mess. 
 

So ragweed is bad around here. I’ve had drainage and what not as usual and been flushing. So my wife and I were coming back from dr visit procedure and the air stopped coming out vents. Pulled out ac filter in car and it was plugged. She starts sneezing etc. we get home and I work outside some. Can’t take shower till morning drs orders. I raise out of bed the next morning and I’m dizzy. It’s been that way for 3 mornings. Eyes itching, drainage in nose, throat and ears clicking. Ears feel full and itchy. Heavy head. Loopy feeling during day. Sinus pressure etc. It can also happen laying down. 

dr checked me no ear infection but they do have clear fluid. He said could be sinus or blood psi . I told him all this just happened. ENT can’t see me till November 1. I am almost positive it is from allergies and will pass soon but I don’t think it has happened before and I am so hypersensitive to anything and everything rt now. 
 

I got caught in a thought anxiety loop this weekend . Is it bp, or wd or allergies, what if dr says steroids or antibiotics etc. 

 

So Good Friday afternoon focused on work and stayed a little over and worked. Then bam. 

 

got 6 drs visits coming up from now until end of November. One being p dr. I just want to be done and left alone. And now the dizziness. I also think these visits are causing withdrawal symptoms to be worse anticipation and worry thoughts . I just want to cry. Trying to hold it together in front of family etc. it seems this maybe causing front face sinuses to ache. This is so hard to hold here. 
Checking blood work this coming week. 

Edited October 16, 2023 by Heath

[Happy2Heal]

hang in there, this is all normal withdrawal stuff ( i know, incredible isn't it???) but you are handling it well and are very self aware and that helps 

 

I was first diagnosed with severe ragweed allergy when it was in my early 30s I think and they told me that allergies cause all sorts of symptoms that you'd never expect, including ones that mimic so called mental or emotional problems

so you kind of have a double whammy there, the actual WD and the allergy related stuff

 

don't feel bad about crying spells, a lot of times that's just what is needed to kinda clear the darkness out of our brains

I know I always felt better after a good cry

 

also I think some of us were so anesthetized by the drugs that when we start healing, we feel things connected to past memories and events that we were not able to truly feel back when they happened, so we kind of have a backlog of emotions to process

 

if that makes any sense

 

you're getting thru it, and that's what counts! it sucks that it's still so tough but you are truly showing your strength each time you put one foot in front of the other

 

you can feel very proud about that!

[Heath]

@Happy2Heal

thank you for the reassurance! I struggle so hard to know what’s wd and what’s not. There is doubt created during these times. 
 

waking in panic has mostly gone but still some, insomnia pretty much gone, can’t focus anxiety at work much much less, weekends better, Now more crying could be stress or for no reason. 
Does this mean anything ? Is there a pattern 
 

it’s been about a year and 3 or 4 months since my last cut. I try not to put a time on this thing but u know.
Had a long window. Then a wave with big stress . been a roller coaster wave for around 6 months.
I have been seeing more windows lately even with the early day anxiety and crying. At this point I just want to stabilize . 
I am grateful that I am sleeping good most nights 6 or 7 hours. Even with some melatonin . 

thank you all for reminding me what is wd! 

[Heath]

11 hours ago, Heath said:

struggle so hard to know what’s wd and what’s not. There is doubt created during these times. 

I guess it’s not really the knowing what’s what, even though you 90% sure it’s wd - the anxiety and nervousness created in withdrawal that then creates hypersensitivity then the doubt in everything - fear of the unknown. 
When in a wave (dark place) it’s much much worse.

It makes a huge difference when folks in the same boat and survivors remind you it is wd then that makes a huge positive influence in others recovery life ! 
 

that’s what I’m trying to say . 

[Heath]

Got to work feeling worse heavy head, sinus pressure, ears and sinuses feel full. Dizziness getting up and laying down now.
Got into see my dr today in a couple hrs. 
little anticipation here. 
so I know NO quinolone antibiotics. 
Question

steroid / cortisone??

 I haven’t had a shot in 4 years. 
I am concerned from what I have read . 

I will listen to dr diagnosis see what she says and weigh the options 
Any thoughts from any mods??? Or anyone??

[Heath]

Update sinus infection. Cedinir antibiotics, and antibiotics shot, and meclizine antihistamine 

[Heath]

Crying. 
most of my family doesn’t really understand wd. They see it. Adult children may say things that will turn on the water , even spouse or anyone. I seem to be so sensitive. Wife is encouraging me. 

Change makes it worse feelings. Thoughts of children moving out all that stuff . 
Changes in life may be instigating withdrawal symptoms. 
cry all day one day the next day just fine. 
How do y’all do it? 

Edited October 18, 2023 by Heath

[Happy2Heal]

2 hours ago, Heath said:

How do y’all do it? 

the same way we do most anything really, one day at a time,

one hour at a time

one minute  at  a time

 

crying is not the worst thing you can do. it can be quite cathartic and helpful at times

 

if you're crying and it seems like it's for "no reason" it is probably a neuro emotion and it will pass

 

It's all going to be ok

 

hope your sinus infection clears up fast, those are annoying 

[Heath]

@Happy2Heal

there has been some wanting to cry for no reason.
And there is the anxiety fear crying. 
mornings sometimes into afternoon. Stress increases it. I’m fine one day or one hour then bam anxiety, fear, worry thoughts etc. inner nervousness. Muscles tensing and releasing. 

Edited October 18, 2023 by Heath

[Heath]

I think all of this is from getting caught in a worry thought spiral Saturday and Sunday. It’s awful 

[Believer]

Heath,

You have had A LOT going on the past several months, a Covid infection, a heart attack, a sinus infection and A/D tapering. Not to mention all the doctors appts and working on top of it. 
 

I think if you could try and normalize what you are feeling, it might help. Covid causes a lot of the symptoms you are feeling as well, and they can last  a long time for some people, all chalked up to a sensitized nervous system. I know it’s super hard while in the midst of it, but it is all very normal. 

One minute at a time.

[Heath]

Thank you

@Believer and @Happy2Heal

 

Thank you both so much for encouragement! I know we all need it in the dark times.
i acknowledge the anxiety feelings and sometimes I m laughing talking to someone while chest and throat is tight. All at same time. 
the thought spiral catches me and fear about things changing. Didn’t have the fear of change before. 
spirals are tough. 

 

[Heath]

Thank you

Edited October 18, 2023 by Heath

[Believer]

I have had many different fears throughout this process, especially  since my ADR to the Covid vaccine. They come (and often last several months) then go and something else takes over. I think the only thing that has helped me is recognizing that a new thought/fear has replaced one that seemed so important in the past. Also, healing is taking place for me because I am able to engage my rational mind more often, through nothing that I am doing. Simply time, acceptance and the grace of God.

[Happy2Heal]

omgosh I had forgotten about your heart attack!  or rather, I knew one of the members had had one this year but was unsure which member it was, sorry. I read a LOT of threads and get confused easily. 

no wonder  you feel this way!

 

I have heard that after  a heart attack many (or most? or maybe even all?) patients get depressed

 

anxiety comes with depression a lot, too, so this may be part of what's causing the crying jags and what not

 

you are getting thru it the best you can and you're doing great

 

try not to put pressure on yourself to do more than just get thru the days ok?

 

you truly are doing fantastic

 

when you start into a spiral, tell yourself that YOU ARE OK now and you are in fact DOING GREAT under the circumstances and have a LOT to be proud of 

because it's true and you need to be telling yourself these things, too

❤️

 

 

 

 

 

[Heath]

I can say the waking in panic has gone thank God! Many things I am grateful for. 
 

I also have been doing more outside in shop . 
 

I hope these mean I’m getting better. 
 

I seem to gotten out of routine and then the ear sinus infection and then the spiral thoughts that keep coming what are you going to do etc. 

 

distraction really helps 

and the spiral try’s to hold you there