labrat15: introduction

[UnfoldingSky]

I hate the cortisol mornings. Nothing like feeling dread for no reason at all to really start your day right...It's good that the Sudafed does work though, and great to hear you've been out biking. I can't wait until it's warm enough to get my bike out here.  

[NeDaytoDayMJ]

I’m glad to hear you have found some relief.  How would you rate your anxiety and stress lately?  

[labrat15]

Well I am dealing with financial stuff so I'm stressed out because of that but I would say that I am at about 75 percent functioning right now. The sudafed without a doubt got me out of the withdrawal and I have just been trending up since stopping it. Seems like it gave me a jump start and got me back going again. I've been walking and biking everyday and have gone back to playing ball hockey.

[labrat15]

Also lost a bunch of weight and I'm probably at my healthy weight now. Had some serious face puffiness going on that has completely gone away. I looked like a potato. @NeDaytoDayMJ

[NeDaytoDayMJ]

Yikes potatoes aren’t the best look.  I’m glad you are able to get out and walk/bike.  It’s not easy but you seem committed!  We reached 52 degrees here today.  Oh boy!  I’m glad winter is nearing an end.  I feel this spring and summer are going to be our best yet!

[labrat15]

Just doing an update. Things have been better for the most part but I did try having a drink to test things out and it is still a no go. I am beyond disappointed and at this point I am completely obsessed with figuring out why I cannot tolerate alcohol or anything anymore. I really enjoyed going out with friends and having a couple drinks before this crap and it was a big part of my social life before and it feels like a huge loss to me. There are a bunch of companies doing clinical trials on psilocybin and are having huge results not only for depression but for addiction and traumatic brain injury. I don't know if this "kindling effect" is caused by PAWS or TBI but psilocybin is showing great results for both.

 

People in addiction are reporting that they are able to drink and do drugs normally after taking psilocybin but how it is doing that is still unclear. I think it may be due to the fact that psilocybin is aiding them with their PAWS symptoms and making them less susceptible to PAWS. I think the majority of addicts continue to use because they feel awful after stopping due to the PAWS and use again to make their symptoms go away and I think psilocybin is reducing their susceptibility to PAWS, reducing the need to use on a daily bases. With TBI people are reporting that their cognitive functions are greatly improved and in a lot of cases their symptoms have completely gone away. 

 

I'm going to wait a bit to level out some more and I will be doing a couple psilocybin sessions over a couple months and will wait a couple more months after and then see if it has fixed this kindling crap.     

[labrat15]

Just doing an update. I am way better and continue to make progress. I can see now why people avoid this site after getting better it just reminds me of the horrific crap I've been through and I rather never think about it again but that also not great for everyone else so I will do updates here and there.

 

I'm still on 0.0625 mg of Rexulti and 5 mg of lexapro but I have decided to not touch anything for a year. I'm going to get a scale and reduce way slower when I do decide to taper more but at this point I'm done and its going to have to wait.

 

I'm going to give myself another month or so to stabilize some more and then I am going to be doing some psilocybin to see if that improves things further. I did psilocybin 2 years ago and it was actually responsible for helping me see through this psychiatry bull crap. Its pretty obvious that the drugs were the problem when you have never suffered any serious mental health problems your whole life and then you take a drug and go down the crapper but I was so scared at the time and just wanted to trust a doctor but after doing psilocybin it confirmed to me that psychiatry was a racket and getting off the drugs was my best bet no matter how horrific it was going to be. I think psilocybin has more to offer with regards to PAWS seeing how addicts find it easier to get off their drugs or reduce usage to recreational use so I'm going to give it a try and see.

[LostInCanada]

Hey @labrat15are you still in Victoria BC. Do you have any recommendations for a good doctor or pharmacist or psychiatrist? Are you involved in a trial here with psilocybin? Are you still taking Sudafed?

[labrat15]

Yeh your not going to be able to get a family doctor here and the medical clinics always have a long wait list. I think some offer walk ins but you will have to call around. As far as seeing a psychiatrist, I highly recommend that you don't as they are an evil cult. 

 

I'm currently conducting my own psilocybin clinical trials and I am happy to report that it as unscrewed me. I'm withdrawing off Sudafed right now and I'm just a little dizzy but no where near as extreme as it has been before and certainly not as bad as getting off antidepressants. Psilocybin without a doubt works and I have improved significantly. Dizziness, anxiety, headache, PSSD, congestion all improved after taking it. I'm just dealing with the sudafed withdrawal so some of those symptoms have come back for me but once I level out from that I'm going to be taking another dose. I've been microdosing during the sudafed withdrawal and that seems to be helping.

 

I'm going to be taking some MDMA as well in the near future as that has shown huge promise with treating PTSD. I am a little shaken up after going though this crap and MDMA helps relieve physical symptoms as well as emotional symptoms of PTSD so I figure it could offer me further benefits. Going to do a couple more psilocybin sessions and wait a couple more months before taking the MDMA.

 

 

[labrat15]

I'll be doing a post in the topics section on psilocybin but I'm just dealing with the sudafed withdrawal right now so I'm going to wait until after I'm through that. @LostInCanada

[LostInCanada]

@labrat15I have a GP and a flunkie psychiatrist got me in this mess. Was just hoping you had found someone that was good.  My GP finally gets that I am in protracted withdrawal after the psychiatrist admitted I am in serotonin withdrawal. It's a joke. I heard some clinics here are working with MDMA and psilocybin... thought maybe you were with one. I just don't want to jump from the frying pan into the fire.

[labrat15]

I don't know of any specific clinics that are working with Psilocybin or MDMA but there are probably a bunch. Victoria and just B.C in general are pretty liberal on those things. If you feel more comfortable doing it in a clinical setting that's totally understandable but I highly recommend it. I know there is a company called Numinus Wellness that operates in Vancouver that is working with ketamine right now and they are waiting for MDMA and Psilocybin approval. Ketamine seems like it may work for this as well but its costly and to be honest MDMA and psilocybin are better options. These idiot psychiatrists are totally out of there minds and its just best to avoid them. 

[labrat15]

It may be hard to get access to clinics working with Psilocybin and MDMA but I know a company called Shroombros that is selling Psilocybin out of Vancouver and they deliver across Canada. I started out slow because I didn't know how I was going to react after getting off antidepressants but everything went really smoothly and I woke up the next morning and knew right away that I had improved. @LostInCanada

[labrat15]

Just doing another update. The psilocybin without a doubt helped significantly but I did have a set back which really sucks. I was feeling about 25 percent better after doing psilocybin and some of my symptoms reduced significantly but I had to withdrawal from Sudafed and that lasted for about 4 to 5 days. I started to have some good days after that but I had a really stressful situation happen and it caused me a wave. My strata decided to hire a window cleaning company and didn't tell any strata members when they would be coming nor did they confirm with anyone if they could enter their property so I came home to someone standing on my patio which totally caught me off guard and I ended up getting pretty upset. I went out outside right away to tell the guy what the hell and to get off my property and the guy refused to leave which was totally out of line and the guy was just being an idiot so I basically yelled at him until he left. Ended up having to call the cops and then the guy took off. This withdrawal has taken a toll on me and I would have probably been able to handle that situation better but that being said it was pretty out of line. Just a really unnecessary setback but hopefully I can get back on track.

 

I am still terrified that I won't get to a point where I'm not being sent back into waves and can start doing stress inducing things like working part time or taking a few courses in school or just going out with friends to do stuff normally again. I mean what happened was unusually stress provoking so I might be able to add a couple things to my schedule soon but I have to take it slow. I tried working a part time job last year about 3 weeks after I stabilized from a taper but that sent me back into withdrawal as well so I'm going to take more time before I try something like that again. The 3 years of isolation is just getting to me and every set back reminds me of it. Im playing ball hockey again pretty consistently and that's going good so I have my ball hockey friends but I am hoping that I can start doing more social things. Wouldn't mind getting a girlfriend or whatever again since the PSSD stuff has pretty much gone away and I do feel that on my good days I'm close to being able to pursue that again but I definitely need some more consistency before I can take that step. I get periods of feeling good and I'm right back to doing anything I can to get out which is good but getting any sort of consistency and maintaining a routine for long periods has been frustrating. I ended up taking some sudafed the last few days to ease my symptoms but hopefully I don't need to use it for any longer than that and can avoid withdrawing. I seriously have to avoid anything that might cause me stress so I can get some consistency and get a good idea of how much I have improved.

 

I have been doing a lot of research lately about what exactly is happening during withdrawal and I do think that there is some brain inflammation going on. I'm sure there are people on here who probably have a better understanding of this but I think the blood brain barrier could be getting broken down during withdrawal because of the intense stress and cause a "leaky brain" which could increase the brains sensitivity to stress and other things and lead to further inflammation. Everything I read says that the blood brain barrier heals so I would think that people would be able to handle stress and other things normally again but it does say that process takes a long time. That adds up to what people seem to experience so that could be what's happening but who knows. Would be nice to figure it out because not knowing is the worst part...

[LostInCanada]

@labrat15 something go2zero said in a post really resonated with me... anything extra we take to cope basically stands in the way of helping your body reach homeostasis. So anything we take should be done sparingly if at all. Also he mentioned the benefits of lavender being as good as benzos.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19962288/ but still recommended minimal dosages and use.

[labrat15]

Are you referring to the Sudafed or the psilocybin? As far as the Sudafed goes yeh it’s definitely not ideal but I’ve been at this for 3 years off and on now and I have lost all tolerance to suffering. My opinion is the pros outweigh the cons at this point for me personally. I would rather not take anything but whatever I should be good here soon and won’t need it. As far as the psilocybin goes, it seem like it does have potential to aid in what people are experiencing here and I thought I’d see if it offered anything and it definitely did. I’m not afraid to take risks anymore but that being said I’m not going out and doing something without doing heavy research first. I really think mdma can help this process as well. I don’t think I need to convince anyone here that this is a ridiculously traumatizing experience and I personally feel very scared most of the time. I don’t have the same view of the world anymore and I’m pretty angry about it but mdma has been a god send for many people suffering from PTSD and I just want to be happy and feel safe again. @LostInCanada

[LostInCanada]

@labrat15 I get this sucks. A body in withdrawal is a different beast  unfortunately. We don't react normally and no matter how hard we try healing comes at its own pace. Keep being patient... 

[labrat15]

I finally got the mdma I ordered online and it is from a project called the “safe supply project” here in Canada but I’m having it tested to make sure it’s a 100 percent pure. I want to wait a month or two and get some stability before I give it a go but I will be letting everyone know how it goes. Alot of the data on mdma has been corrupted and it turns out it is one of the safest drugs you can take if used appropriately. The government did a big study a while ago and claimed that mdma was neurotoxic but the researchers actually switched out the mdma with meth and they got caught eventually with had to retract the study. A non profit organization called maps has been advocating and bringing  mdma through clinical trials for ptsd and other conditions and have proven it is a very safe drug with the dosing and frequency they have been using. This isn’t a big pharma company doing these trials so the safety data is probably a little more accurate. 

[labrat15]

Just another update. Psilocybin has been a total game changer for me. I was taking microdoses (0.25-0.50 grams) for the last 2 weeks and doing the odd macrodose of 2 grams and I was steadily making progress but I decided to do a higher dose of 3.5 grams yesterday and I feel the best I ever have since taking these antidepressants. A lot of people have reported on reddit that the higher doses are sometimes needed to get the full benefits so I tried it out and about half way through the trip something must of happened and I just kind of knew that I was out of withdrawal. I felt so happy and it just felt like a part of me was connected again. Its like my eye sight just got sharper or something its kinda of hard to explain but everything was no longer blurry and I was not dizzy anymore.

 

Psilocybin is being brought though clinical trials right now by some biotech companies and based on the amazing results they have been getting its expected to be approved by 2026. I seriously would highly encourage people here to give it a try. I started with lower doses just to make sure that I wouldn't have a bad reaction but everything was I totally fine and it was enjoyable as well. One of the clinical trials tested a group of people after being taken off there antidepressants and they were all tapered off them over a 2 week period. There is no doubt a lot of those people went into severe withdrawal after such a short taper and everyone still tolerated the psilocybin well and the results were amazing. I think 50 percent went into complete remission of their "depression" and 86 percent or something around that experienced noticeable benefits after so the psilocybin probably reduced or completely eliminated their withdrawal and treated their underlying depression symptoms. Psilocybin is also being tested for treating things like TBI, addiction, and other neurological disorders showing great results and is very well tolerated so it seems like psychedelics are just a great class of medication for improving brain function and I think it can treat whatever these antidepressant do to people based on my experience.

 

At this point I think this antidepressants withdrawal is more than just typical drug withdrawal and that there is probably something else happening like TBI or god knows what. Maybe it is just severe withdrawal but it seems like withdrawling off of meth and heroin is easier than withdrawling off antidepressants and antipsychotics based on some reports by people on reddit. Based on my experience though psilocybin seems to have treated whatever these horrific drugs did to me. I will keep doing updates and let people know if this sustains itself.

[UnfoldingSky]

Hey labrat, thought I'd check out how you are doing.  Great to hear of your improvement!  Hope you're enjoying your turn for the better...Has the psilocybin helped with exercising, are you able to handle it better now?

 

 

[labrat15]

Yeh I'm biking everyday and added a workout after as well and have no problems. Only time a get some slight symptoms is after ball hockey but that is some serious cardio so that's probably why. I've decided that I'm biting the bullet and getting off the rest of the Rexulti. I'm currently on 1/8th of a starting dose so whatever I'm doing it and getting it done. I still get a little whacked out after I take both my meds but I can't take them together so I just want off the Rexulti so that I can start taking the 5 mg of Lexapro at night and don't have to deal with an hour of feeling off every morning then I can taper ridiculously slowly off the lexapro probably over a year period. I'm going to micro dose 2 days a week and take the Sudafed during this next taper and I am hopeful that it will go smoother than the last one.   

[labrat15]

I can't tell you how excited I am to be done with this med finally. Hopefully the sudafed and microdosing makes this go smoother. @UnfoldingSky

[UnfoldingSky]

@labrat15 It's great you will be off one of the meds! And so good to hear that you can get out biking too.   I really need to get out biking too, but my bike is now stuck behind a lot of boxes since we moved...

 

Think I might look into psilocybin too.  I could use a boost to my memory, it's improved a lot over where it was (severe loss, more due to benzos than ADs), I'm going to have to research it see if it might be helpful for me too. 

 

Also I agree with what you wrote above, I think withdrawing off psych meds is worse than meth or heroin...I'm pretty sure there's a book about getting off benzos with the title "Worse than Heroin".  

[labrat15]

There are huge things going on with psilocybin right now I would highly recommend looking into it. There such a wide variety of neurological diseases including addiction/drug withdrawal that psilocybin is being tested for and showing great results so I'm sure it can help heal whatever has happened to us and based on my experience there is no doubt that it has helped significantly. I'm going to be doing some MDMA and potentially some DMT as well to see if that helps me further. MDMA is a year away from approval to treat PTSD and even though I'm getting better I'm still haunted by this nightmare everyday and I'm sure you and everyone else on here are as well. I can't help but get angry about it pretty much daily and I have dreams around this experience some of which have been pretty disturbing so its hard to put this whole thing behind me. MDMA seems to be close to a miracle cure for PTSD and it is considered very safe but I just want to get off this drug first and get stable again before trying it out. At this point I have no hesitations trying some things out and taking some risks. I just want my old life back so its either that or bust for me personally but that being said psilocybin seems to be one of the safest drugs you could take despite the stigma. If you have any history of psychosis then its definitely a no go but if you don't then your totally fine. @UnfoldingSky   

[labrat15]

If your wanting to take psilocybin for the pro cognitive effects look into microdosing. @UnfoldingSky 

[labrat15]

@Altostrata

 

Hey Alto I just need to ask your opinion on something. I've been taking psilocybin and it has pretty much eliminated the withdrawal for me. I feeling way better but I do feel like crap after I take my SSRI in the morning for a couple hours. I don't get extreme withdrawal symptoms but I do get some cognitive problems and dizziness for a couple hours after taking it. I want to move taking my SSRI to before bed but apparently I cannot take the SSRI and Rexulti at the same time. I've tried to take them together and it didn't go well so I think I have to get off the Rexulti completely before moving the SSRI to before bed. In your opinion do you think that I could try coming off the rest of the 0.065 mg of Rexulti or how long after recovering from this last taper should I give myself? Last summer I tapered off from 0.5 to 0.25 mg and recovered within 2 months but then I tapered another 0.125 mg about 2 weeks after recovering from that and that really set me off and I spent the last 6 months recovering. I don't want that to happen again but I need to get off this Rexulti so I can take the SSRI at night and can go about my day feeling normal. I haven't done a taper in 7 months and have been feeling pretty good for the last month so I don't know if that is enough time in between tapers or what. I just want to get off the rest of this Rexulti so that I can go back to school this September and its such a small amount to get off.. I'm not sure if I would be able to go to school while taking the SSRI in the morning. I wouldnt be able to do full time school while taking the SSRI in the mornings anyway. 

[labrat15]

@Altostrata. Or maybe I can take the SSRI at like 6 or 7 pm and take the Rexulti at 9 or 10 pm. I tried asking my pharmacist if taking the SSRI and Rexulti 3 or 4 hours apart would work but its pretty clear he doesn't have a clue. I would prefer just to get off the Rexulti completely and be done with it and take the SSRI at night and taper the SSRI ridiculously slowly over a year period but I don't want to risk being debilitated for another 6 months..    

[Altostrata]

Sorry, we cannot offer peer counseling for psilocybin dosing.

[labrat15]

I didn’t ask anything about psilocybin dosing I don’t know where you got that from. I thought you might have been interested in psilocybin and how it’s helped seeing how many people are having major success with it for antidepressant withdrawal alto….

@Altostrata

[Altostrata]

2 hours ago, labrat15 said:

Hey Alto I just need to ask your opinion on something.

 

My opinion is that we do not offer peer counseling for psilocybin dosing or a drug mix that includes psilocybin.

[UnfoldingSky]

On 5/22/2023 at 8:37 PM, labrat15 said:

If your wanting to take psilocybin for the pro cognitive effects look into microdosing. @UnfoldingSky 

 

@labrat, hope you're doing well.  Do you find it helps with concentration? Mine's all messed up since taking the pills.

[NeDaytoDayMJ]

Hi! I'm sorry you found zero guidance from Altostrata.  I'm not sure she even read what you wrote.  I'm sure she is busy responding to everyone but I would guess no response would be better than the response you received.  Anyways, how have you been?  Have you reduced any of the drugs that you are taking?  

[UnfoldingSky]

Hey labrat,  checking in to see how you are doing. Let us know if you can.