Focusnbalance: want to be free of Zoloft and Abilify

[Focusnbalance]

Hi, I'm glad to have found SA. Here's my journey so far.

 

Since 17 (I'm 46 now) I have had panic attacks and anxiety. I never knew what was happening to me and developed a phobia around eating in front of people for fear of embarrassing myself. I found it hard to sleep or eat. 

 

2003 - had terrible obsessions and panic while pregnant and ended up with postpartum depression. It was horrible, my thoughts were very dark all while taking care of my newborn. I got an emergency Dr appointment and started Zoloft. It helped and after 9 months Dr told me to just stop taking it, so I did.

 

2012 - had constant high anxiety leading to a breakdown and suicidal ideation. I restarted Zoloft.

 

In Nov 2014 I decided I didn't need it anymore and started a half dose taper. After coming off completely I was agitated, angry, with constant anxiety and insomnia.

 

Restarted 50mg zoloft April 2015 and have been on it till now. After much thinking and journaling I realized my main problem is that I'd become completely obsessed with a topic, idea or person and the intensity of this obsession would lead to anxiety. The anxiety would be all encompassing, not just one panic attack but all day pacing, thinking. I couldn't keep food down or sleep. The depression would come after realizing I was now not able to function, take care of my kids or work. The Zoloft helped with this but not completely. This was a cyclical event with a baseline few months of stability in between.

 

2018 - when I was able to articulate this to my doctor, she said I needed something for the highs, that Zoloft was taking care of my lows. She claimed I was "probably somewhere on the bipolar spectrum" I started taking abilify. I did and do feel much more even. I have gained 20 pounds since taking it. I made some major changes in my life right at the same time I started taking abilify. I decided my religion I converted to in 1998 was no longer for me, especially the heavy focus on hell, which never helped my anxiety. I attribute my even mood working through my changing beliefs and the reasons I converted in the first place. I started making art again and found it very therapeutic. That doctor left the office soon after and I'm stuck with a new doctor who is uncaring and cold.

 

2022 - since January I have had really low energy, not depressed but just exhausted. After 10 years on medication, I want off and I want to lose the weight. I want to see what I'm like without it. Before finding this site, in March I decided to cut the abilify in half. It's been a great week at this dose. After some headaches, some energy has returned and I have way less problems with word retrieval.

 

Since being told I might be bipolar, I took it to heart and started seeing myself thorough that lens. But my ups never matched up with other people's experiences on bipolar forums. I didn't talk fast or spend money, I just got really into something to an obsessive level. I'm starting to wonder if I'm letting doctors pathologicalize just me, who I am. I want work though my issues and deal with my mind naturally. 

 

I realize I shouldn't have cut the abilify in half, but I'm here now and will hold for a month and re-evaluate.

 

Thank you for reading.

[getofflex]

Hello, and welcome to SA.  We are a volunteer-run community of people who have been or are getting off of psychiatric drugs.  It sounds like you have a lot of good self awareness, which is a very good strength, especially for wanting to come off psychiatric drugs.  Are you having any symptoms now?  We don't recommend that people cut their dose in half to taper a psych med - that too big of a cut.  Do you remember about what day or when in March you reduced your Abilify?  If not, was it early, mid, or late March?  Please add this info to your drug history in signature, thank you! 

 

Here is some information about how these drugs actually work.   This explains why we get symptoms from going off of these medications, and why it's so important to taper slowly and carefully, and be very cautious about changing our doses: 

 

How Psychiatric Drugs Remodel Your Brain

 

 

This helps you understand what withdrawal syndrome is: 

 

Video on Recovery from Psych Drugs

 

Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

 

Tapering is best done extremely slowly, and we generally taper by 10% of the current dose no more than once every 4 weeks, so that the reduction becomes exponentially smaller.

 

 Why Taper by 10% of my Dosage  

 

When we are on more than 1 psych drug, we need to carefully think about which drug to taper first.  We usually taper the more activating drug first, because that will help preserve your sleep, and lessen the chance of withdrawal anxiety.  In your case that would be the Zoloft, as antidepressants tend to be activating, while Abilify, an anti psychotic, tends to be sedating.  Read this link for more info:   

 

Taking Multiple Psych Drugs - Which to Taper First

 

Here is a link with checklists of common WD symptoms: 

 

Dr Joseph Glenmullen Withdrawal Symptom Checklists

 

 

Here are some techniques to cope with symptoms: 

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

Stability is really important when we are tapering off psych meds.  Please read the link about stability:

 

Keep It Simple, Slow, and Stable

 

 

We don't suggest many supplements, but 2 that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil. Here are the links for info about those. It is suggested to add one at a time, and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

Take your time to read through all of the information I've given you.  We look forward to hearing from you again soon.  

[Focusnbalance]

Thank you @getofflex for all the info. I just read through the links. I cut the 2mg abilify in half on March 22. I have no symptoms right now other than my dreams have returned and are vivid but they always were. I had a physical exam last week and I'm waiting on the blood work. I suspect my liver enzymes or blood sugar is high since I've had no energy lately. 

 

If the blood work comes back high, I know the doctor is going to say get off the abilify. If it comes back normal, should I remain at 1 mg and start working on the Zoloft? I thought starting the one with the lower mgs would be best but the link you shared explained it well.

 

[getofflex]

1 hour ago, Focusnbalance said:

If it comes back normal, should I remain at 1 mg and start working on the Zoloft?

Yes, that is what I would do.  In fact, since you made a 50% reduction of the Abilify recently, I would hold on these current doses for at least several months before reducing the Zoloft.  Sometimes, these things can sneak up on us, and withdrawal symptoms can show up 2 or 3 months later.  You want to be sure your system is stable before starting or continuing a taper.  

 

1 hour ago, Focusnbalance said:

If the blood work comes back high, I know the doctor is going to say get off the abilify

In this case, we want to try and balance your need to get off the Abilify with trying not to go into severe withdrawal.  It will be a balancing act.  We will cross that bridge when we get to it.  If your bloodwork is high, I would talk to the doctor about the importance of a prudent taper, because cold turkeying off psych meds can put you at risk of being sick for years.  Please find out more specifics about the ramifications of blood work being high, if this is the case.  

[Focusnbalance]

Hi, my blood work is ok for liver enzymes. But my A1C is in the prediabetic range and my triglycerides are high, LDL is borderline. I can't imagine staying on the abilify for two or three more years while I taper Zoloft first with these issues as I'm sure the metabolic issues are from the abilify. They are not giving me any new medication for the A1C but told me to exercise and eat healthy. I know from experience exercising won't budge my weight. I will be doing it anyway, but I think it's best to taper abilify first after I've had a few months since my last cut. 

[Altostrata]

Hello, @Focusnbalance

 

Abilify is the primary culprit for that weight gain and metabolic issues, but Zoloft may be doing its part, too. It makes sense for you to prioritize minimizing Abilify first. 

 

It's very possible that bipolar is a misdiagnosis for you and you never "needed" the Abilify. It sounds like you have resolved some of your preoccupations and you might consider ending your reliance on psychiatric drugs.

 

As you've only just made a reduction in Abilify, we advise waiting a month to see how that affects you. Please consider tapering the last 1mg more slowly; it's possible that 1mg has had the greater amount of effect on your system. See Tips for tapering off aripiprazole (Abilify)

 

Please let us know how you're doing.