Brenmos: Citalopram 20mg, withdrawal, Trazodone

[LostInCanada]

Just keep everything consistent as possible. Take you dose at the same time. Try to have as structured of a routine as possible. 

[Brenmos]

Is 7 months off a particularly hard time for people?

[LostInCanada]

 It's been 7 months of consistent reinstatement. You might be in a wave.

[Brenmos]

Even the paroxetine and trazodone that I was already on counts as reinstatement? I never reinstated the citalopram.

[LostInCanada]

Sorry no. I thought you had went off the paroxetine. Not thinking clearly today. I know 3 to 9 months there can be a peak of symptoms. What is getting worse? 

[Brenmos]

I feel like the insomnia has been. Taking longer to fall asleep and last night it didn’t feel like I fell asleep at all. But I was told I was snoring so I was sleeping.

 

All of this started October 27th when I was having the body aches, chills, and headaches. The next day I woke up with swollen tonsils and uvula. I didn’t feel like I had an infection. 
 

Also feeling hopeless and not wanting to be alone. Mild suicidal thoughts. 

[LostInCanada]

A flu bug could be causing enhanced WD. Or it could be a wave. Hopefully this will pass quickly.

[Brenmos]

It feels like a waves. 
 

How are you?

[LostInCanada]

I think I am in a wave. The stress of the situation has just multiplied everything. Just trying to cope. 🙏🙏🙏

[Brenmos]

I’m really sorry. We were hoping this wouldn’t send you into a wave. How long do the waves typically last for you?

[LostInCanada]

Thanks. It usually lasts a week but it has lingered for almost a month too. How about you, do you have any pattern?

[Brenmos]

I really haven’t noticed a particular pattern at all.

[LostInCanada]

It takes me about 3 days to figure out that I am in a wave. My husband says one indicator is I keep saying I don't know to everything. Can't make a decision or figure out anything. Not a fun part of the journey.

[Brenmos]

I must be in a pretty big wave with my insomnia then. After I was “sick” which didn’t feel like an infection. 

 

How is your daughter?
 

 

[LostInCanada]

She is just staying busy. Trying to not overthink it. The results come on Monday. She lives in England so I am a million miles away and in this protracted mess. Hopefully it will be benign. 🙏🙏🙏

[Brenmos]

It will 🙏! And we will be better too 🙏🙏.

[LostInCanada]

Hey @Brenmos how are you doing lately? Seeing any improvement?

[Brenmos]

Hi @LostInCanada for the first three weeks I was in a wave in November then I had a pretty nice window for the rest of the month. I think I’m entering another wave.

 

How are you?

[LostInCanada]

@Brenmos glad you had a window. I am doing well at the moment. It's been hard to tell what is stress and anxiety from our daughter or what is WD. She is hime now and stronger everyday so that is slowly lifting my stress thankfully. 👍

[Brenmos]

I’m happy to hear that about your daughter 🤗. It feels like I’m in that part of withdrawal where it gets worse (month 7-8).

[LostInCanada]

Thanks @Brenmos Do you think a very small updose would help?

[Brenmos]

I really don’t know. I’m afraid of it making things worse. And I had so many side effects while taking citalopram. 

[LostInCanada]

It is so hard to know but if you can manage without the updose then I think stick with it. Definitely challenging.

[Brenmos]

How are you @LostInCanada

[LostInCanada]

Hey @Brenmos I am doing okay. Got 4 hours of continuous sleep 2 nights ago which is a rate occurrence so was happy about that. Now if that could be every night I'd be ecstatic lol.

Was wondering how you are? Any changes?

[Brenmos]

I got sick early last week and it’s really made my insomnia worse. Lost my smell for about a day and a half. 

[LostInCanada]

Sorry to hear. I’ve been getting phantom smells again. It is crazy how ADs affect so much. I am sure your WD is linked to smell loss. Hoping for much better days ahead. 

[Brenmos]

I do believe I’m actually sick or getting over being sick. My tonsils have been swollen and I do have yellow/green phlegm.

 

How is your daughter?

[LostInCanada]

Sucks being sick on top of the usual WD. My daughter is doing well. I was not happy that within 24 hours they gave her morphine twice, fentanyl, tramadol, and OxyContin. Thankfully she didn’t have any adverse reactions but I guess only morphine helped with the pain. She will have another colonoscopy in July. She seems to be staying busy and not dwelling on it so that’s good.

How has your work situation been going?

[Brenmos]

I would be so nervous if I knew a loved one was going to be given drugs that can cause grave harm. Knowing what we have experienced.

 

I started working at a restaurant again. I did that for about five years before I started my career. Of course the career is on hold as I travel for a living. I’ve always enjoyed working at a restaurant. I didn’t even last at McDonald’s for a full month 🤦‍♂️😅. I just couldn’t do it.

[LostInCanada]

11 hours ago, Brenmos said:

didn’t even last at McDonald’s for a full month

At least you tried. I wouldn't have lasted that long so good for you.

11 hours ago, Brenmos said:

started working at a restaurant again. I did that for about five years before I started my career

I worked in restaurants as well when I was young. I too enjoyed it. Hope is is a better pace and atmosphere than Mc.

11 hours ago, Brenmos said:

I would be so nervous if I knew a loved one was going to be given drugs

Exactly and I was trying to warn her without adding more stress. 

 

Are any of your symptoms lessening? Any windows?

[Brenmos]

I did have almost a month of better sleep. Falling asleep faster and deeper. Then I entered a wave and THEN became sick.
 

Insomnia and moderate PSSD are my only symptoms. 

[LostInCanada]

8 hours ago, Brenmos said:

Insomnia and moderate PSSD are my only symptoms. 

You are doing really well. Good to see even small improvement💯

[Brenmos]

Thank you. I appreciate that 🙂. I have to remember that 10 months is still early even though it feels like along time 😪.

[LostInCanada]

@Brenmos been thinking about you and hoping you are seeing some improvement. Wishing you well.🙏💯

[Brenmos]

@LostInCanada hey! When I got over being sick my sleep got a bit better. Falling asleep faster and staying asleep longer. I still feel like I don’t sleep as deep as I did before withdrawal.