ThreeLittleBirds: Lexapro withdrawls

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Hi I was prescribed Paroxetine and Lexapro for over 10 years for my depression and anxiety. Tbh I was prescribed an array of medications by my first doctor who seemed hell bent on throwing them at me like tic tacs.

After still having suicidal idealtion, endless crying spells, depression and anxiety another medication was added to the growing list...Zoloft. I had a severe reaction and had to stop it in a day. It traumatised me so much, I didn't resume my Lexapro medication.

I went on with my life and for the first month I was fine and didn't really notice the absence of Lexapro in my life.

But then I was struck down with anxiety and depression and tried to go back on my 5mg of Lexapro but got an allergic reaction from being off them for a month. 

I have been put on St. John's Wort and I'm trying to hold on but I'm losing all hope as I see my life collapse before my eyes.

I'm physically getting worse and feel so physically weak and nauseated. I have brain zaps and tingles. I can't eat or exercise and feel that my life is over. It's absolutely terrifying. I fear becoming homeless because I need a job and money for essentials. I miss the person I used to be and never felt so alone in my life. There's no one that seems to understand and no support network in Australia.

I know I didn't taper slowly enough and it would of been wise to do it slower. But unfortunately I tried to restart using Lexapro and had severe allergic reactions. We also don't have it in liquid form in Australia for a 10 percent tapering reduction.

I now live all alone with no partner or support network. I'm 49 years old and feel that my life is over. 

Living with no hope, physical and mental symptoms, suicidal idealation, loneliness and despair coupled with financial stress makes me feel as though I just can't make it through this.

I'm starting to lose all hope.

 

Edited February 1 by Emonda
Name to title

[Emonda]

Welcome @ThreeLittleBirds,

 

So the moderators can best help you, please complete your drug signature by following these instructions. Adding a signature ensures your drug history appears at the bottom of every post, making it more efficient for those trying to assist. Once you do this, we can see how fast you tapered and try to assist from there.

 

It sounds like you are experiencing WD symptoms. Have you seen this checklist? Daily Checklist of Antidepressant Withdrawal Symptoms (PDF) 

 

14 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I know I didn't taper slowly enough and it would of been wise to do it slower. But unfortunately I tried to restart using Lexapro and had severe allergic reactions.

 

May I ask what dose you started back on before you stopped again? It sounds like you started too high. These links are helpful:

 

About Reinstating and Stabilizing to Reduce Withdrawal Symptoms

 

Kindling

 

6 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Living with no hope, physical and mental symptoms, suicidal idealation, loneliness and despair coupled with financial stress makes me feel as though I just can't make it through this.

I'm starting to lose all hope.

 

How you are feeling right now is temporary. So many on this site understand exactly how you feel.

 

If things are really bad, pick up the phone and chat with a friend/family. If that's not an option, LifeLine is there to help in an immediate crisis.

 

You will improve with time. Improvement tends to follow this pattern: Windows and waves pattern of stabilization

 

If you find your mind descending downwards, going around and around, this is a helpful link: Emotional Spirals

 

Some of us find these Non-drug coping strategies helpful.

 

How's your sleep? I find this can be helpful: Melatonin for sleep

 

We don't suggest many supplements, but two that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil. Here are the links for info about those. Add one at a time and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium

 

Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil)

 

Avoid alcohol. 

 

This is your own Introduction topic.  Each member has only ONE Introduction topic.  Your own Introduction topic is the best place to ask questions and the place to journal your progress.  This keeps your history in one place and means you do not have to repeat your story. 

 

Once again, welcome to S.A....and please remember your drug signature.

 

Emonda

 

[LostInCanada]

Hi @ThreeLittleBirds. Welcome to SA. You are not alone. If you can do the drug signature that would be great. Click on the 3 lines on the right top, then click Account, then account settings, the settings area then signature. Remember to save it.

How long since you have been taking St John's wort? Are you completely off paroxetine? Since when? When did you quit lexapro and when did you try to reinstate? What did the allergic reaction look like? 

So sorry you are dealing with this. Please be kind to yourself. This is not a failure on your part. ♥️ Almost all of us have been where you are now. It will get better. 

[Emonda]

Thanks for adding your signature, @ThreeLittleBirds,

 

To confirm, you dropped from 5mg to 0mg of Lexapro on 30 October 2023, right?

 

When did you try to reinstate 5mg of Lexapro? 

 

When reinstating a previous AD, it is best done within the first 3 months, and often, the amount reinstated is very small to try to avoid kindling.

 

Has there been any change in your symptoms since adding St John's Wort?

 

You're not taking anything else, right? How long ago did you stop Paroxetine?

 

Sorry, lots of questions.

[LostInCanada]

7 hours ago, Emonda said:

When did you try to reinstate 5mg of Lexapro

5 mg was definitely too high if a dose to reinstate at. This is why you had an adverse reaction. Thankfully you stopped immediately. What date was the reinstatement? You are still very close to the 3 month window for reinstatement but definitely it would have to be a very small dose, no more than 0.5 mg though confirmation on that amount would be needed from @Emonda

What date did you start taking St John's Wort and how much do you take? Is it every day? Please do not add any other supplement or herb for the time being. 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Hi, I do not remember the exact date I tried to reinstate the Lexapro medication. I did so for only one day since the adverse reactions was so extreme. I really have no wish to take the medication again in any dosage. 

Even if I wanted to it not being in liquid form (in Australia) makes reinstating such a small amount impossible.

I am absolutely traumised by all SSRI's and feel they have taken away my life and any chance of happiness I might have had.

I do not take anything besides 2 tablets of St. John's Wort every morning.

Sorry I can't remember the exact date I stopped taking Paroxetine but it's been about 6 years and was transitioned to Lexapro.

Edited February 2 by ThreeLittleBirds
Forgot to put in Paroxetine history

[LostInCanada]

St John's Wort is not advisable. It can make withdrawal worse. What is the dose of each pill? @KenA is it possible for her to stop taking it cold turkey?

It is fine not to reinstate if you do not wish. This site does tell us how to make our own liquid though. 

[KenA]

How long have you been taking St John's for? If you have been taking it for 3 months or more I would recommend some sort of a taper. You can probably go down by more than 10 percent per month. Maybe like 25 percent, but I would recommend tapering. CT quitting St Johns caused me a world of hurt, but I took them for over 8 years.

[LostInCanada]

@KenA they have been taking St John's Wort since December 13 so not even a month.

[KenA]

Ok, it shouldnt be too big of an issue to stop. Maybe take 1 a day for a week, then stop. 

[Emonda]

5 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I did so for only one day since the adverse reactions was so extreme

 

Years back, I did something similar with Lexapro. I'd gone on and off a few times without a problem (unsuccessfully trying to stop CT before finding this site), but the final time, I had some sort of bad reaction or kindling experience to 5mg. I immediately stopped and ended up on my current AD.

 

I'm with LostinCanada. If you choose to reinstate, then 0.5mg may be reasonable to test the waters and hopefully ease your symptoms before tapering slowly from there...but we are not here to try to force you one way or the other.

 

5 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Even if I wanted to it not being in liquid form (in Australia) makes reinstating such a small amount impossible.

 

I make my own liquid from a pill form of my AD. It relatively easy, although you can't do it with all ADs. 

 

Thanks to LostinCanada and KenA for your valuable input 👍 

 

 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Thank all of you guys for your input. I must admit to feeling so overwhelmed by this but appreciate your advice. 

So little is acknowledged or advised by the doctors here. I've explained to my doctor my situation and have found very little empathy.

He told me to just "fake being happy until I was happy".

I admit to feeling extremely hopeless and lost and have become terrified of Lexapro.

[LostInCanada]

9 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

So little is acknowledged or advised by the doctors here. I've explained to my doctor my situation and have found very little empathy.

It is very frustrating to know the professionals that should be caring for us have cased the problem. Just know we have each other here and are cheering each other on despite it all. 

Emonda gave you some great links to read up on. Adding magnesium bisglycinate and omega 3 have helped many of us. Reading Claire Weekes and doing CBT is also beneficial. Your central nervous system needs to heal so eliminating as much stress as possible and not overdoing anything is important. St Johns Wort affects the CNS so it can have negative effects for someone in withdrawal. Keeping a spreadsheet of symptoms and rating them daily 1-10 is an easy way to monitor progress and notice any patterns. One day at a time. 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

I don't want to reinstate Lexapro but feel as though I have little choice. Just the thought of going back on it makes want to cry. 

It was my fault for going cold turkey and I blame myself for my stupidity and the predicament I'm in now. 

Can I even go back to Lexapro after being off it for nearly two months? 

If yes, how do I turn the pill in to a liquid form? Sorry I just feel so scared and all alone with no support system.

[LostInCanada]

24 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

It was my fault for going cold turkey and I blame myself

Not true at all. You are not the medical professional nor the prescribing doctor. Please don’t beat yourself up.

26 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

the thought of going back on it makes want to cry. 

I get it. When I had to reinstate, everyday for months I would say time to take my poison. But I came to terms with it. My body is dependent and the drug is a temporary necessity. 
 

 

29 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Can I even go back to Lexapro after being off it for nearly two months? 

I was 3 months off and the reinstatement was a success. You will have to be careful to start with a small dose. There are no guarantees but I was happy I did.

31 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

how do I turn the pill in to a liquid form?

I will try to find the link for you on here.

[LostInCanada]

For some reason I am struggling with sharing the link. 
You can put ‘Tips for tapering Lexapro’ in the search and it should take you to Altostrata’s post. 
According to the post, liquid form is available in Australia.

Have you stopped taking St Johns Wort?

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Thank you LostInCanada for your support. I'm still finding it tricky to work out how to answer back to posts. 

I have asked my doctor and the chemist, liquid form is not available in Australia.

I wake up suicidal, chronic flu like symptoms and fatigue. I was praying it was Covid. All my energy is gone and despair is all that remains. I am surrounded by darkness.

I really appreciate your help and hope I can figure out how to use this forum better. Totally clueless and the my mental focus further impedes me. 

I haven't stopped SJW but decreased it to 1 tablet. Do you recommend stopping it altogether? 

 

[LostInCanada]

@ThreeLittleBirdsyes I do recommend stopping The SJW. Experience on here shows it causes more destabilizing and can also result in dependency with withdrawals. 
I had really bad SI  ran the 3 month point of my cold turkey. Reinstatement quickly turned that around for me and stopped the dp/dr as well. Force yourself to look for things to be grateful for. I know it is so hard. I couldn’t laugh or smile but I read something that said when you see your reflection, force a smile. I did even when I was crying. It really did help. It’s as if you have to relearn all these simple things again. 
You are doing great really. This is such a horrible experience. Don’t underestimate your strength or bravery. 
Can you get 1ml syringes, small dark glass bottle? When you make liquid it is important to use the same utensils and measuring techniques for consistency. The liquid only lasts about 3 days in the fridge is my understanding. Were you able to find the tips for tapering lexapro area?

@Emondamakes liquid so he could probably help with that. 
 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

I had a friend of a friend that ended her relationship with the AD "poison" after 7 years and after slowly tapering her AD went replaced it with SJW. 

I hope to do that. That's my long term goal. I've got MDD and GAD and I would need some sort of SSRI in my life. 

I haven't searched the liquid making method yet. I will try to research and thank you for the helpful tips.

[Emonda]

53 minutes ago, LostInCanada said:

Tips for tapering Lexapro

 

 

1 hour ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

how do I turn the pill in to a liquid form?

 

 

 

[Emonda]

1 hour ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

It was my fault for going cold turkey and I blame myself for my stupidity and the predicament I'm in now.

 

I'm with LostinCanada. You're not the doctor. We just need to accept the past, learn from it and move forward.

 

44 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I'm still finding it tricky to work out how to answer back to posts.

 

Just highlight the bit you want to respond to with your mouse. Once highlighted, it says "quote selection" click that, and you'll then be responding to a particular point.

 

46 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I have asked my doctor and the chemist, liquid form is not available in Australia.

 

You can buy it a ChemistWarehouse. They'll take a day or two to order it in. Or, I can give you more details on how I turn my tablet into liquid.

 

47 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I wake up suicidal, chronic flu like symptoms and fatigue. I was praying it was Covid. All my energy is gone and despair is all that remains. I am surrounded by darkness.

 

Really sounds like WD symptoms. Have another read of the WD symptom checklist I posted in my first post.

 

15 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I've got MDD and GAD and I would need some sort of SSRI in my life. 

 

I've been told this for decades, but tapering slow and steady, as per the advice on this site, is working for me and many others here. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I could reduce my dose by ~85%.

 

If you choose to reinstate a small amount, once you stabilise (think in terms of months, not days or weeks), then you can slowly taper, and you'll be writing your success story before you know it.

[LostInCanada]

42 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I've got MDD and GAD and I would need some sort of SSRI in my life. 

We have been told to believe this. Those same doctors that give us all these labels put us in this mess. Big pharmacy profits and doctors get a cut. Hard to trust a profession based on profits and kickbacks. 
SJW might work once you are past this nightmare. My doctor never checked my magnesium, B levels, ferritin or even suggested therapy. I think there are so many avenues worth exploring before even considering SSRIS but drugs are the doctors’ go to and I didn’t know there were options. 
That is  my final rant for the day lol.

 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Hi LostInCanada,

This is not my first rodeo. I started medications at 39. Worse decision of my life. But I've done every therapy under the sun and read every self help book. I hate the doctor that started me on this path and every other doctor that has continued their abuse of the mentally vulnerable. They care about the money and I don't fool myself in to believing they care at all about me.

In Australia doctors study medicine for 6 months (but can prescribe it) and pharmacist study medication for 4 years.

I was always sad since 15 but healthier and with less physical, mental and no suicidal thoughts before AD.

[ThreeLittleBirds]

1 hour ago, Emonda said:

You can buy it a ChemistWarehouse. They'll take a day or two to order it in. Or, I can give you more details on how I turn my tablet into liquid.

I will ask my somewhat dimwitted doctor about it. Thanks for the highlighting tip to reply to quote.

Look at me go! 😁

[LostInCanada]

59 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

was always sad since 15 but healthier

This makes me think about my daughter with pmdd.(another label) We women are complex creatures and highly misunderstood by the medical field 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

1 minute ago, LostInCanada said:

This makes me think about my daughter with pmdd.(another label) We women are complex creatures and highly misunderstood by the medical field 

I think they discard other factors that may cause depression and anxiety. Childhood trauma and neglect, emotional and mental abuse, endometrosis, PTSD from sexual abuse. 

There are situations that cause anxiety and depression and is not solely based on a chemical imbalance.

[LostInCanada]

34 minutes ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

not solely based on a chemical imbalance.

You might be surprised to know that this phrase chemical imbalance was never even a scientific fact. And has been proven as fiction but the lie goes on. There is a section on this site that exposes this and the psychiatric community knows it and still encourages it. 

[Emonda]

1 hour ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

chemical imbalance

 

This is the link LostinCanada was referring to: Again, chemical imbalance is a myth. Stop the lies, please.

[LostInCanada]

9 hours ago, Emonda said:

This is the link LostinCanada was referring

Thanks @Emonda I was in my iPad and just couldn't get it to copy the links. 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Sorry guys if I'm not using this site properly...I still find it confusing.

 

I abruptly stopped my 5mg dosage of Lexapro on the 30 October 2023. After much physical and mental pain, my doctor reinstated me back on 1mg of Lexapro on the 13 April 2024. After 5 days I stopped it because it brought on severe panic attacks and agoraphobia. 

I feel so lost. My doctor doesn't believe I should of experienced any withdrawal symptoms and I cannot easily reach him when I'm having side effects or complications with reinstating. He wanted to put me straight back on 5mg and thought it was ridiculous I wanted to reinstate at such a low dosage.

Australia is so far behind in research about protracted withdrawal symptoms and most medical professionals I have contacted believe it's all in my head and are suggesting I might not being experiencing withdrawals but might be mentally ill and need to see a psychiatrist.

Sometimes I feel as though I am going crazy because Australia offers no support and nobody seems to believe me. I feel as though I'm caught in a nightmare. 🥺🥺🥺

[LostInCanada]

8 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

my doctor reinstated me back on 1mg of Lexapro on the 13 April 2024

Reinstatement works best within 3 months of stopping the drug. 1 mg was probably too high.

8 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

My doctor doesn't believe I should of experienced any withdrawal symptoms and I cannot easily reach him when I'm having side effects or complications with reinstating. He wanted to put me straight back on 5mg

This is all they care to do it offer another drug. There is nothing one can do for the withdrawal symptoms but ride it out. It takes time and patience. It has been 6 months since you went off. Not ideal for reinstatement. Did you want to try a smaller dose or are you going to ride out the body's healing process?

 

8 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

believe it's all in my head and are suggesting I might not being experiencing withdrawals but might be mentally ill and need to see a psychiatrist

Of course that is what they say. The alternative is that they are wrong and have caused this mess. I was told by the psychiatrist, when I was cold turkeyed by her and experiencing extreme WD, it was just because the drug was no longer covering up other mental illnesses I suffered from. What a joke!

 

You will heal doing nothing. It will take time and patience. 

[Emonda]

13 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Sorry guys if I'm not using this site properly

 

You're doing just fine 👍

 

Completely agree with LostinCanada re the 3 months and too high reinstatement dose....you're not to know that. I had a similar bad reaction to reinstating Lex ~10 years ago. I stopped it reasonably quickly, and improvement gradually came.

 

13 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Australia is so far behind in research about protracted withdrawal symptoms and most medical professionals I have contacted believe it's all in my head and are suggesting I might not being experiencing withdrawals but might be mentally ill and need to see a psychiatrist.

 

Sadly, I don't believe it's just Aussie doctors!

 

13 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Sometimes I feel as though I am going crazy because Australia offers no support and nobody seems to believe me.

 

There are plenty of members right here on this site who 100% believe you.

 

13 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

I feel as though I'm caught in a nightmare. 🥺🥺🥺

 

I'm sorry you're in this position. Time and continued patience...

[ThreeLittleBirds]

On 4/23/2024 at 7:00 AM, Emonda said:

 

You're doing just fine 👍

 

Completely agree with LostinCanada re the 3 months and too high reinstatement dose....you're not to know that. I had a similar bad reaction to reinstating Lex ~10 years ago. I stopped it reasonably quickly, and improvement gradually came.

 

 

Sadly, I don't believe it's just Aussie doctors!

 

 

There are plenty of members right here on this site who 100% believe you.

 

 

I'm sorry you're in this position. Time and continued patience...

 

Thank you for your support. Sometimes I feel like I will never reach the end of this nightmare that is now my daily reality. 

I wish there was real life support groups for people to meet up and encourage each other to continue to fight and maybe share stories of hope. 

[ThreeLittleBirds]

On 4/23/2024 at 2:10 AM, LostInCanada said:

Reinstatement works best within 3 months of stopping the drug. 1 mg was probably too high.

This is all they care to do it offer another drug. There is nothing one can do for the withdrawal symptoms but ride it out. It takes time and patience. It has been 6 months since you went off. Not ideal for reinstatement. Did you want to try a smaller dose or are you going to ride out the body's healing process?

 

Of course that is what they say. The alternative is that they are wrong and have caused this mess. I was told by the psychiatrist, when I was cold turkeyed by her and experiencing extreme WD, it was just because the drug was no longer covering up other mental illnesses I suffered from. What a joke!

 

You will heal doing nothing. It will take time and patience. 

 

Hello LostInCanada,

I'm completely lost in my quest to regain my life back and my sanity. 

To be completely honest reinstatement of even a smaller dose of Lexapro is terrifying to me. 

I know nobody on this site is a medical professional but I am interested in how you did it or are you still in the process?

My GAD, depression and Suicidal idealation is through the roof and everyday is an emotional roller-coaster.

I can't get any professional medical advice and wonder if my body would accept another SSRI (like Paroxetine) to calm down the withdrawals and my nervous system? 

I really just want this nightmare to end. I cannot get out of bed most days and feel incapable of handling any type of employment with such chronic physical and emotional distress

😭😭😭😭

 

Does your mind ever really recover and mend itself from all the damage done to it?

[ThreeLittleBirds]

Hi Guys,

 

I just wanted to update after the nightmarish experience of trying to reinstate the 1mg of liquid Lexapro (it brought on never before panic attacks and agoraphobia), I threw the remaining liquid in the rubbish bin. Since going cold turkey on the 30th of October 2023, it was obviously too long a period to reinstate the SSRI. I know there is nobody on this site that is going to coerce me to reinstate the medication at the lower recommended dosage of 0.5mg but even if that was the best course of action, I threw it away out of sheer terror.

 

I guess I was wondering if there's any chance of just not taking Lexapro again or if resuming another former medication like Paroxetine, would it bring out the same allergic side effects? I probably not using all the correct terms but in Australia, nobody has any information in regard to this withdrawal process. The pharmacist told me it should only last 2 weeks but as you can tell, it's been going on for months.

 

Is it normal to feel flu like, have chronic fatigue and tire out easily? I can't sleep at night and constantly wake up every 2 hours with bouts of anxiety, I have lost weight as my anxiety makes me nauseated and my nerves still feel like they are screaming especially after trying to reinstate the 1mg Lexapro.  I've read that exercise is important and try to walk as often as possible, but my body feels so weak and faintish. I used to be quite active, and I use to exercise and do pilates...now I feel exhausted, and all my confidence has gone.  Sorry for the complaints but it has taken so much joy out of my life and have lost the ability to smile, laugh, watch a movie or read a book as my focus is totally shot and my anxiety is skyrocketed with my agitated nervous system.  I know that meditation and exercise is an important part of recovery but find the energy and focus really hard to have to follow through on this process.

 

Sorry for the long rant...I hope I made sense. I'm so tired and feel totally lost.

 

I will appreciate all your help guys

 

ThreeLittleBirds

 

[Catwoman73]

8 hours ago, ThreeLittleBirds said:

Hi Guys,

 

I just wanted to update after the nightmarish experience of trying to reinstate the 1mg of liquid Lexapro (it brought on never before panic attacks and agoraphobia), I threw the remaining liquid in the rubbish bin. Since going cold turkey on the 30th of October 2023, it was obviously too long a period to reinstate the SSRI. I know there is nobody on this site that is going to coerce me to reinstate the medication at the lower recommended dosage of 0.5mg but even if that was the best course of action, I threw it away out of sheer terror.

 

I guess I was wondering if there's any chance of just not taking Lexapro again or if resuming another former medication like Paroxetine, would it bring out the same allergic side effects? I probably not using all the correct terms but in Australia, nobody has any information in regard to this withdrawal process. The pharmacist told me it should only last 2 weeks but as you can tell, it's been going on for months.

 

Is it normal to feel flu like, have chronic fatigue and tire out easily? I can't sleep at night and constantly wake up every 2 hours with bouts of anxiety, I have lost weight as my anxiety makes me nauseated and my nerves still feel like they are screaming especially after trying to reinstate the 1mg Lexapro.  I've read that exercise is important and try to walk as often as possible, but my body feels so weak and faintish. I used to be quite active, and I use to exercise and do pilates...now I feel exhausted, and all my confidence has gone.  Sorry for the complaints but it has taken so much joy out of my life and have lost the ability to smile, laugh, watch a movie or read a book as my focus is totally shot and my anxiety is skyrocketed with my agitated nervous system.  I know that meditation and exercise is an important part of recovery but find the energy and focus really hard to have to follow through on this process.

 

Sorry for the long rant...I hope I made sense. I'm so tired and feel totally lost.

 

I will appreciate all your help guys

 

ThreeLittleBirds

 

Hi @ThreeLittleBirds- I'm new here, and wanted to say hello.  I'm so sorry for the difficulties you're having.  I'm no professional, but I have lots of experience with lots of drugs.  I can only tell you what I have experienced.  Whenever I have tried to reintroduce a drug that I had been off of for more than a couple of months, I had terrible side effects.  One almost killed me- I tried to restart Wellbutrin several years after stopping it with a rapid taper, and I developed a dangerous arrhythmia.  The only exception, interestingly, was Lexapro lol- the one that has caused you so many problems!  So I don't know- maybe trying something different might help you in the moment, but maybe not.  I don't think there are any easy answers here.   If you do try something new, I would start at a SUPER low dose.

 

I think the symptoms you are having a perfectly normal withdrawal effects.  It SUCKS.  I really do believe in non-drug methods of coping, but meditation and hard core exercise can certainly be impossible when you're in this state.  Aim smaller- do a short walk around the block.  Like 5 minutes. I like floating in water- I find it very calming.  Try journaling- even if all you can do at first is write one sentence.  I also enjoy spending time with animals- my pets get mauled with attention when I'm going through anything difficult- it has been scientifically proven to lower blood pressure and help with mental well-being.  I also find that accomplishing something- even something really small, like cleaning my cat's litter box- helps me feel a bit better in my own skin.  I think it reminds me that I am capable.  Just think small, and take things one minute at a time... you can do this!!! ❤️‍🩹