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direstraits

☼ direstraits: Paxil withdrawal

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Frogie
1 hour ago, direstraits said:

Hi @Frogie

thanks for your concern....actually I did have apretty good weekend,watched my grandson Sat, evening.

unfortunately feeling worse again today,but I've been worse than this...it's just so cruel how you think you're doing better then it knocks you down again.

hope you're having agood day.

love,ds

xx

That's great you got to see your grandson. I haven't seen my granddaughter since before Easter. Sorry you aren't feeling well today, but I know exactly what you mean. You wake up feeling pretty good then wham! Happens to me a lot.

Hope you feel better soon.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

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Carmie
10 hours ago, direstraits said:

Hi @Frogie

thanks for your concern....actually I did have apretty good weekend,watched my grandson Sat, evening.

unfortunately feeling worse again today,but I've been worse than this...it's just so cruel how you think you're doing better then it knocks you down again.

hope you're having agood day.

love,ds

xx

Hi Direstraits, 

Yes, it is a cruel turn, isn’t it? One minute we’re in a window n the next minute we’re riding a wave.

 

Glad you had a nice time with your grandson.

 

Sending hugs xxx

 

 

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AliG

Sending Love , J.  :wub: 

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direstraits

Hi @Carmie

thanks for your kind words.

sorry to read what you've been through,sounds horrific.

sending lots of healing thoughts to you.

hugs,ds

xx

 

 

@AliG  thanks, back at ya ❤️

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direstraits

4 years off today.

guess I could be worse....hoped to be much better.

life goes on.

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coldturkmama
1 hour ago, direstraits said:

4 years off today.

guess I could be worse....hoped to be much better.

life goes on.

 

I had hoped the same when I hit 4 yrs off. 

It will improve, slowly but surely. 

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direstraits

thanks for the support, @coldturkmama

hope you're doing well.

xx

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coldturkmama
On 4/20/2018 at 12:21 PM, direstraits said:

I feel like I have been doing worse since having my cataract surgery in Jan.

I was wondering if any body else felt worse after surgery or anesthesia and how long it took for you to get back to WD normal?

thanks for any replies.

 

Depends on the day! Lol 

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direstraits

I still have times when I think about going back on meds.

Ijust get so tired of feeling like this...I want to enjoy life again,I'm 63 years old and tired of wasting time dealing with this suffering.

I feel so lost and defeated....still amazed how a pill can cause all this suffering....tired of waiting to be well again.

I just feel the need to DO something to make this all stop.

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Littlegrandma

I completely understand DS. You’ve been going through this a long time, a lot longer than me. I wish we had a crystal ball to know exactly what the future holds for us. I know the now and present is hell. I don’t think anybody would blame you if that’s the route you choose. You deserve happiness. You’ve been fighting a long time and have proven your strength but these freakin little pills are amazingly stronger and evil. It doesn’t even seem real. Everyday feels a dream, a nightmare. 

 

You are one tough lady. I’m in awe of what you have endured. And I admire you so much. 

Love and hugs, lg

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direstraits

thanks, @Littlegrandma

I appreciate your kind support.

xxx

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direstraits

happy to report a decent day,thank God.

was able to go to lunch with my husband ,then we drove down the shore,beautiful day.

feeling grateful but always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

😟

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Littlegrandma

👍

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coldturkmama
30 minutes ago, direstraits said:

happy to report a decent day,thank God.

was able to go to lunch with my husband ,then we drove down the shore,beautiful day.

feeling grateful but always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

😟

 

Isnt that the truth. 🙄

had three good days and then today was kinda off, not the worst but not the best. 

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direstraits

thanks,lg...hope you're doing OK.

 

3 good days sounds great,ctm!

 

hopeyou both have a Happy Mother's Day.

 

love,ds

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Littlegrandma

Happy Mother’s Day DS 🌷

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coldturkmama
21 minutes ago, direstraits said:

thanks,lg...hope you're doing OK.

 

3 good days sounds great,ctm!

 

hopeyou both have a Happy Mother's Day.

 

love,ds

 

💕

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direstraits

it's so awful when you've been feeling like you're really getting better and then you're thrown back into it again.

it started Wed. night when I didn't sleep well but the anxiety wasn't too bad.

Thurs. wasn't too bad during the day, slept pretty good that night, but woke up Friday to the horrible anxiety,feeling Iwanted to jump outta my skin....ugh.

I did start to feel better as the day went on,though.

 

then yesterday woke up to the misery again and it lasted through the day,yuck.felt abit better in the evening ...woke last night with some anxiety got up and took a magnesium about 3:30 am got back to sleep after an hour or so. 

 anyway,I just have to hang on to the hope that I am healing and this will pass and hopefully feel better again soon.

wishing everyone well.

xx

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SkyBlue

Hi D,

That sure sounds like windows and waves, all right. 

I totally understand about how very long this can take. Sounds like you're doing all the right things. 

I'm glad that you're holding on to the hope that you're healing. 

I hope that you get a window very, very soon.

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Littlegrandma

DS

just want you to know I’m thinking about   ❤️

 

Very frustrating and frightening!

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wantrelief

Hey DS - I am so sorry you went into a wave.  How very frustrating as It sounded like you had some really good feelings earlier in the week, hang on to those feelings as they will be back again.

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direstraits

Thank you, Sky.

I was feeling so good for about a couple weeks, almost felt like my old self at times, thought maybe this is finally almost over with after 4 long years but nope, not so fast WD said.😞

but at least I know that it CAN get better and eventually I'll get there .

xx

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direstraits

Thanks for the kind words, @Littlegrandma and @wantrelief

I really appreciate it.

hope you're doing well today.

xx

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Athena

Sorry about this wave DS, but so happy for you about the previous window! It means you're getting there, don't give up.

 

Love and peace xx

 

Athena

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direstraits

great to hear from you, @Athena !

think I'm feeling a little better today.

thanks for your support and encouragement!

How are u?

love,ds

xx

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Jarred

what symptoms do you get in your windows and waves? Are they different every day? 

 

Im new to the forum and your original post sounds similar to me! 

:( I hope we all get better!

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direstraits

feeling as bad as ever today,losing hope again that this will ever be over.

I really thought I was almost recovered then I  get knocked down again.

this is too cruel....I'm just so lost,and feel like a failure for not being able to overcome this.

I'm scared and wonder how much more of this I can take.

 

I'm sorry if I'm scaring anyone, I think I might be one of the worse cases.😞

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wantrelief

I am really sorry you are feeling so badly today, DS.  It must be incredibly disheartening and frustrating to think you are "there" only to have it go away.  Please don't think this has anything to do with you, that you are a failure in any way.  It is NOT you at all, just your brain taking its time to heal.  You did feel to a point where you felt "almost recovered" so there is no reason to think you won't get back there, DS - I am just sorry it isn't today but you will get there.  Thinking of you - WR.

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direstraits

Thanks for your encouraging post,WR.

Ireally appreciate your support.

I feel like I jinxed myself when I said I was feeling so much better!

think I'll keep my mouth shut next time.😉

 

hope you're having a decent day.

ds

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coldturkmama
4 hours ago, direstraits said:

feeling as bad as ever today,losing hope again that this will ever be over.

I really thought I was almost recovered then I  get knocked down again.

this is too cruel....I'm just so lost,and feel like a failure for not being able to overcome this.

I'm scared and wonder how much more of this I can take.

 

I'm sorry if I'm scaring anyone, I think I might be one of the worse cases.😞

 

I felt the same way. Everything was so up and down. No stability in my windows and waves. At 4.5 years off it was scary. 

I am finally doing a lot better and although it’s not 💯- I know it’s only going to get better. Try to hang in there.

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Carmie
7 hours ago, direstraits said:

feeling as bad as ever today,losing hope again that this will ever be over.

I really thought I was almost recovered then I  get knocked down again.

this is too cruel....I'm just so lost,and feel like a failure for not being able to overcome this.

I'm scared and wonder how much more of this I can take.

 

I'm sorry if I'm scaring anyone, I think I might be one of the worse cases.😞

 

Hi Direstraits, 

 

I’m so sorry that you’re feeling so bad, must be hard being in protracted withdrawals so long. I read a bit of your thread and it looks like you have some good days, that’s a blessing, though when we get bad days sometimes it’s hard to remember the good ones. I like making happy memories and then looking back on them when I’m in waves and thinking of the happy memories I will make again when in a window.

 

You said you almost felt felt like you had recovered, even that in itself shows that you were having good days. You will eventually get there, we just don’t know when. Everyone here is in the same boat, we are always looking for the windows. The way I’m going I’ll probably still be tapering in ten years, I can only drop by tiny doses. 

 

I try not to dwell on that and just try to live in the moment and try to find little things that give me joy, as well as coping strategies. It’s not easy, but what other choice do we have?

 

Hope you cope as best as you can today. 

 

Sending hugs to you🤗

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direstraits
12 hours ago, coldturkmama said:

 

I felt the same way. Everything was so up and down. No stability in my windows and waves. At 4.5 years off it was scary. 

I am finally doing a lot better and although it’s not 💯- I know it’s only going to get better. Try to hang in there.

thanks for this,ctm....it gives me hope for the future.

so glad you're doing a lot better!

xx

 

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direstraits

thanks for your post, @Carmie...I really appreciate the support.

yes,we have to remember the good days when we're feeling bad and know they will return again.

 

It's a beautiful summer day here and I'm gonna get out with my husband and enjoy it as best I can!

I think it's late where you are,so wishing you a great tomorrow!

take care,ds

xx

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Carmie
8 hours ago, direstraits said:

thanks for your post, @Carmie...I really appreciate the support.

yes,we have to remember the good days when we're feeling bad and know they will return again.

 

It's a beautiful summer day here and I'm gonna get out with my husband and enjoy it as best I can!

I think it's late where you are,so wishing you a great tomorrow!

take care,ds

xx

 

Hi Direstraits, 

 

I hope that you had a delightful day out and about despite how you’re feeling. Enjoy the summer days. It’s nice to be out in nature on a beautiful day, it really lift one’s spirits. It’s winter here but the sun is still shining.

 

When I’m out and about I try to notice the little things in nature, a flower, a leaf, a grasshopper. Everything really is amazing. I love photography too and love taking photos of nature. I think being in nature is good for our wellbeing and recovery. 

 

Take care, and I hope you have happy days out and about 💚

 

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coldturkmama
22 hours ago, direstraits said:

thanks for this,ctm....it gives me hope for the future.

so glad you're doing a lot better!

xx

 

Xxx 

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direstraits
14 hours ago, Carmie said:

 

Hi Direstraits, 

 

I hope that you had a delightful day out and about despite how you’re feeling. Enjoy the summer days. It’s nice to be out in nature on a beautiful day, it really lift one’s spirits. It’s winter here but the sun is still shining.

 

When I’m out and about I try to notice the little things in nature, a flower, a leaf, a grasshopper. Everything really is amazing. I love photography too and love taking photos of nature. I think being in nature is good for our wellbeing and recovery. 

 

Take care, and I hope you have happy days out and about 💚

 

thanks,Carmie.

I really enjoyed the day...we drove down to the shore( I guess you call it the beach🙂) it was beautiful day,walked on the beach and boardwalk ( do you have them?) got my favorite fudge before we left for home.

yeah, I love being out in nature,it's good for the soul.

 

some anxiety this morning but not too bad.

 

I read that you have CFS.that must make WD so much more difficult,my heart goes out to you.

sending healing thoughts to you.

take care,ds

xx

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