holli: messed up Zoloft tapering?

[holli]

i’m noticing improvements these past couple of days! my nausea really wasn’t that present today, i didn’t even feel too sick eating or with movement. i’m also noticing that my appetite seems to be showing a little tiny improvement lately, so i’m hoping that means it’s going to continue getting better! my tremors are also pretty much gone at this point too! i still have usual uncomfortable restlessness and vertigo/unbalanced sensations and my head still feels very drugged and heavy sometimes. but i feel a lift? i’m hoping this is a good sign that it’ll keep improving!

 

with the above, i think i’ll stay on this dose for a bit? i’ll hold off on the prozac idea and i’ll hold off on reduction. i want to see if these improvements will keep happening and maybe this means my nervous system is slowly calming down. with that calm, maybe i’ll handle future reductions better? we’ll see. im just feeling more positive with these improvements today  

 

here’s notes, i didn’t really fill them out properly today because it wasn’t that intense and i forgot, so maybe that’s a good sign too!

1st december:

1am - restless anxiety, really uncomfortable. want to sleep because i’m so tired but i can’t relax

2:30am - finally eased and fell asleep

11am - woke up

11:30am - took 10.7mg liquid zoloft

12:15pm - snack, head feels "off", nausea (feel like i’m going to gag), ataxia sensations, dp/dr

1pm - lunch, feel really uncomfortable, restless anxiety, nausea increasing, still have ataxia sensations, getting hot

2:30pm - still restless but not as bad, still very uncomfortable, nausea eased a little, cooled down, internal vibrations

3:30pm - head just feels very gone, still very uncomfortable, dp/dr

5pm - snack, same as above

6:30pm - dinner, symptoms eased a little, noticing that i have a little bit more of an appetite than usual! i did gag while eating though even though i didn’t feel sick

8pm - snack, head still feels off 

10pm - took birth control, same as above, going hot and a bit restless

11:30pm - cooled a little, head still heavy and slight brain zaps, ataxia sensations

[getofflex]

On 11/30/2021 at 5:41 PM, holli said:

i just really want to be able to function and get my appetite back, and i want to trust that prozac could do that for me, but im also really scared about coming off zoloft and going to something new. but then tapering zoloft 0.1mg at a time and experiencing akathisia is also terrifying

I'm basing the following on the fact that you've had adverse reactions to multiple antidepressants, and also each drug change (such as switching from Zoloft to prozac) we make tends to further sensitize and destabilize the nervous system.  If it were me, I think I would just stick with the Zoloft, and instead of dropping in increments of 0.1mg, drop by increments of only 0.05 mg.  I know these are minute drops, but slow and steady wins the race.  I've been getting off my Lexapro at a glacial pace.  I'm in my 5th year of tapering off.  But, it has been well worth it, and I'm glad I'm taking my time. 

 

On 11/30/2021 at 4:23 PM, holli said:

when i dropped, i think i experienced akathisia? it was the worst sensation i’d felt so far and it really ruined my sleep for a while.

What exactly happened when you felt as though you had akathisia?  Specifically how did it impact you sleep?  

[holli]

1 hour ago, getofflex said:

If it were me, I think I would just stick with the Zoloft, and instead of dropping in increments of 0.1mg, drop by increments of only 0.05 mg.  I know these are minute drops, but slow and steady wins the race.

i think you’re right, both me and my mum have been discussing the switch a lot and we think it might be too risky. dropping that slow is very hard for me to wrap my head around, but like you say slow and steady does win the race. 

 

1 hour ago, getofflex said:

What exactly happened when you felt as though you had akathisia?  Specifically how did it impact you sleep?

it’s really hard to explain, but it’s the worst feeling i’ve ever felt in my body. it’s like i could feel all the atoms at once and i couldn’t stay still, i couldn’t get comfortable and it made me want to rip my limbs off for some relief. it impacted my sleep because it seemed to really increase when i would get into bed and then i would spend hours tossing and turning in agony. 

[getofflex]

On 12/2/2021 at 11:47 AM, holli said:

i couldn’t stay still

then that could have been akathisia.  Here is a thread about that: 

 

Akathisia vs. Restlessness

 

At any rate, I'm glad your system settled down after a week and a half. 

[holli]

22 hours ago, getofflex said:

At any rate, I'm glad your system settled down after a week and a half.

i’m glad too! i’ll probably hold my dose until after christmas, just so i can hopefully stay settled and enjoy some festivities.

 

however, my symptoms are increasing and intensifying again after that settle, and unfortunately it’s due to relationship issues and i’m attempting to try end the relationship without causing too much damage to myself or my ex. unfortunately he never really understood this whole thing well, and as a result it caused a lot of arguments, amongst other issues that were stirring for ages. it’s a mess and it’s really stressing me out. i didn’t throw up for a week and i felt more like myself, but after this whole thing i’ve been feeling sick and threw up again, and i’m a lot more low in mood. so i’m a bit shaken up and might be for a while, but i know i need to focus on myself and recovering so hopefully i’ll ease again soon.

 

i’ve decided i’m going to stop doing daily notes if that’s okay? i’m still keeping notes myself but as i’m not going to drop for a while, i want to minimise my visits to this site to focus on distracting healthily and hopefully encouraging more improvements. i’ll come back and check in maybe weekly or something with an overview, just for reference sake. 

[getofflex]

 

On 12/4/2021 at 11:34 AM, holli said:

i’m attempting to try end the relationship without causing too much damage to myself or my ex. unfortunately he never really understood this whole thing well, and as a result it caused a lot of arguments, amongst other issues that were stirring for ages.

Ah yes, the stress from human relationships can be very intense.  I know, I've been there - not romantic relationships, but family and friends.  Stress can and will definitely aggravate withdrawal symptoms!  

 

One of the big things I've learned as I've aged, is that I have every right to eliminate people out of my life if they cause me more harm than good.  I've had to do that several times, and the only thing I regretted about it, is that I didn't eliminate these people sooner.  

On 12/4/2021 at 11:34 AM, holli said:

i’ve decided i’m going to stop doing daily notes if that’s okay?

Yes, that's fine!  👍

 

On 12/4/2021 at 11:34 AM, holli said:

i’m still keeping notes myself

That's good.  That way, if anything comes up, you can check your notes to try and see what triggered the problem.  Take care!

[Lilmizz21]

@holli

 

Hi Holli, hope you dont mind me reaching out.

 

I too suffer with these brain sensations, pressure, gripping almost pain. 

 

Has this stopped for you at all or improved?

 

Well done on your journey so far 💞

[holli]

On 12/23/2021 at 2:23 AM, Lilmizz21 said:

@holli

 

Hi Holli, hope you dont mind me reaching out.

 

I too suffer with these brain sensations, pressure, gripping almost pain. 

 

Has this stopped for you at all or improved?

 

Well done on your journey so far 💞

hi! sorry for getting back to you so late!

 

i still get these sensations sadly, though fortunately not as much as i used to. i get all types of weird sensations in my head ever since reducing my dose, but when i first dropped i remember the electrical zap sensations were quite painful and uncomfortable and ever since i started reducing sensibly and slowly, they don’t hurt and they’re not as intense anymore. 

 

even as i write this i have uncomfortable pressure in my brain, but it’s not enough to bother me, it’s something that i’ve gotten used to as it’s lessened.

 

hope you’re doing well!!  

[holli]

hi, it’s been a while! i hope anyone reading this had a lovely christmas if they celebrate  

 

i unfortunately did not really celebrate christmas at all this year. usually i love it and i love the lead up to it, but i’m still the same symptom wise as i was since i last posted, so it was just another day of suffering and coping with debilitating symptoms in my room for me. really hoping i can make up for this missed holiday next year.

 

i haven’t changed my dose since 18th november since i was having relationship stress (which lead to a break up) plus i was getting stressed about christmas, so i held until the holidays and the chaos of it all passed. however, i’m going to drop to 10.6mg tomorrow and start hopefully regularly reducing at a pace i can handle. i really need to get lower so the adverse reactions can stop happening, because i am still unfortunately throwing up more often than i would like and i would really love to gain some functionality.

 

as for symptoms, everything is still pretty much the same. still pretty intense and still leaving me non functional. i will say that lately, i have a lot of eye symptoms (feels like they’re bulging, feels like i don’t adjust to light right, blurry vision, tunnel vision etc.) and restlessness. tremors came back for a while over christmas when i was particularly stressed but they seem to have gone again now, though i still get twitches throughout my body often. i’m also just extremely sensitive and i get so overwhelmed easily. ever since i took these drugs, my stress tolerance just got worse and worse. it goes up and down in what i can handle but lately, any stress makes all my symptoms intensify and it’s distressing. i really can’t wait to get off this poison.

 

im still not going to be as active on this site while i do this. i find whenever i come on here now, i’m filled with anxiety and dread. i used to be here all the time in early withdrawal, reading all the information i could, but now i cant even read about anything to do with this or i find my symptoms ramp up. so i’ll update occasionally still! i’m going to play the reductions by ear and see how i react but i feel reducing by 0.1mg every two weeks could be okay since it’s a very small amount? obviously if i find that’s too fast, i’ll go slower but i’m hoping because it’s minuscule i might be able to drop fortnightly. we’ll see!

 

 

[getofflex]

14 hours ago, holli said:

i haven’t changed my dose since 18th november since i was having relationship stress (which lead to a break up) plus i was getting stressed about christmas, so i held until the holidays and the chaos of it all passed

Good job on the hold.  

 

14 hours ago, holli said:

i’m going to drop to 10.6mg tomorrow and start hopefully regularly reducing at a pace i can handle.

It's good that you are doing a very small reduction. 

 

14 hours ago, holli said:

tremors came back for a while over christmas when i was particularly stressed but they seem to have gone again now, though i still get twitches throughout my body often.

This is great news.  It sounds as though the adverse reaction is lessening.  

 

14 hours ago, holli said:

i’m also just extremely sensitive and i get so overwhelmed easily. ever since i took these drugs, my stress tolerance just got worse and worse. it goes up and down in what i can handle but lately, any stress makes all my symptoms intensify and it’s distressing. i really can’t wait to get off this poison.

Welcome to the club.  I'm the same way, and so are many other people. 

 

Good to hear from you again.  

14 hours ago, holli said:

reducing by 0.1mg every two weeks could be okay since it’s a very small amount? obviously if i find that’s too fast, i’ll go slower but i’m hoping because it’s minuscule i might be able to drop fortnightly. we’ll see!

The best way is to listen to your body, and see how your feel before you do a reduction.  Take care!