Momoffour: Struggling Post-Sertraline CT

[Momoffour]

Just not for a while 

[Heath]

25 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Is this kaleidoscope vision effect a new symptom?

 
Interesting I’ve never heard it called that, but it pretty much describes it. Almost like a extra layer of water over eyes. 

Momoffour I have had it randomly too! And not always in both eyes at same time . Usually Very short durations. 

[Momoffour]

@Heath yeah, it's very weird. Like translucent circles, hard to explain. Mostly only when I'm outside and its bright 

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata the main new symptom I've had since reinstating is brain anxiety or more like the stomach anxiety only in my brain/head (brain zaps?) but also anxiety in my whole body with restless which may be akathisia 

[Momoffour]

And if they'd go away and the overwhelmed brain feeling  I could handle most of it. 

[Altostrata]

This is a symptom that lasts only a short while after you take your sertraline dose, correct? Didn't we already talk about it being a start-up symptom?

 

You do not have to report symptoms that have been occurring randomly since you went off sertraline or even before. Are you confused about which symptoms are important to figure out whether the dosage increase is helping?

 

What I need to know about is NEW symptoms. It is unnecessary for me to read your reporting blow-by-blow of every little thing throughout the day. I know you don't feel well and you have been having weird random symptoms, that's the nature of withdrawal syndrome, especially after one has chosen to take the risks of cold turkey.

 

If you think if you complain enough, I will fix it, I'll tell you right now -- I cannot. Please be more respectful of my time.

 

 

[ChessieCat]

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

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[Momoffour]

@AltostrataI'm not trying to waste your time. It's one of my main symptoms now that does last all day with little breaks between. And this has been since I reinstated. 

[Momoffour]

And I didn't choose to. I had no clue this is would happen. I appreciate you helping me. And I'm not complaining necessarily. I'm informing you that the brain anxiety, weird vision, and overwhelmed head feeling are all new since I reinstated and my main symptoms. 

[Momoffour]

If that's normal then great. But I tell you so I know that it is. 

[Momoffour]

I accidentally deleted all my notes so i will start from now 4:45 pm

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata so don't put all my symptoms in the notes only the new ones? I understand now. I think. 

[Momoffour]

I thought maybe you needed to know all my symptoms throughout the day and how I feel before and after my dose. So I will try to post less and only make a note when it's a new symptom

[Heath]

Momoffour  I have had withdrawals like yours maybe 4 or 5 times and reinstated before I found SA. Many people have and that’s why we are all here. Most of us misinformed. 
 

The first time was a month long cold turkey. The others were over a year or longer taper but still too fast. The first time was devastating, full of fear, guilt, anxiety and ocd type worry. The last couple of fast withdrawals I started learning  it is a time thing . So basically fear, anxiety, and ocd were much less but still there, and I just for most part bided my time and waited with the physical symptoms. It has always taking me after reinstatement and hold about 3 months to start feeling better and 6 to 9 months to be back to myself. It wasn’t hell for a full 6 months, It’s a gradual thing. Waves and windows. 
 

I learned that sometimes I had to just close the book per say. I became not only more aware of my thoughts, symptoms and feelings but that it’s ok they aren’t gonna kill me. Now mind you it didn’t happen overnight and I still struggle with what if sometimes. And I m still struggling with floating just letting it be but Iam getting better at it. The only way to get better at it is practice it and the only way to practice is to experience it. 
 

I remember obsessing over it so much my wife would have to distract me to do something else. And all the physical symptoms like you describe. Withdrawals are tough! But the good thing is it gets better. 
Try and accept and acknowledge this is withdrawals and work towards stability and distract yourself and go on about your life like it’s not there. Easy peasy right. 😁 

 

You are getting better little by little , hard to realize it, just hold on steady and time . 

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata new symptom. Pain like an earache that radiates to my neck like its nerves this morning. Before sertraline 

 I should add im down to 3 birth control so my menstrual cycle could be soon. I feel like I have somewhat improved the last couple of days but it's hard to explain how. Even though my vision is worse today 

[Momoffour]

Also more vertigo today 

[Momoffour]

@Heath Thank you. I am praying to stabilize for my husband and kids also. I'm so sorry you or anyone else has to suffer in this. It breaks my heart I was reading altos story and just cried like a baby wanting to hug her and anyone suffering or has for so long

 strong getting through it .... I honestly wish I could polydrug pharma for a good 6 months and then rip them off of it.

They've ruined so many lives.

I am definitely getting better each day at riding the waves trying to be a mom and keep a home while dealing with this all.

My husband is working out of state and my mother is here luckily to help me.

I also found a good friend to talk to all day sometimes if I need to. We will play card games etc via apps even though it's so hard with the brain symptoms while talking on the phone and it helps tremendously while we try to help each other get through this. 

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata just updating... the anxieties are happening less as well as the overwhelmed head feeling.., however my stomach feels really full a lot now and nausea kinda painful.  Still muscle tension, collar bone pressure, and weird vision as well as having a hard time adjusting from bright light to dark and vice versa. Broken sleep... Today I also felt really weird for a few hours and still going but it's hard to explain. Feel the same before and after sertraline. 

[Altostrata]

On 3/8/2022 at 3:33 PM, Momoffour said:

@AltostrataI'm not trying to waste your time. It's one of my main symptoms now that does last all day with little breaks between. And this has been since I reinstated. 

 

What are you talking about?

 

13 minutes ago, Momoffour said:

@Altostrata just updating... the anxieties are happening less as well as the overwhelmed head feeling.., however my stomach feels really full a lot now and nausea kinda painful.  Still muscle tension, collar bone pressure, and weird vision as well as having a hard time adjusting from bright light to dark and vice versa. Broken sleep... Today I also felt really weird for a few hours and still going but it's hard to explain. Feel the same before and after sertraline. 

 

I do not have to know about your persistent withdrawal symptoms, only significant new ones. Good to hear the 3mg is helping a bit.

[Momoffour]

@AltostrataUnfortunately, the stomach feeling full has been persistent the last 2 days and the weird feeling i believe is low blood pressure  because im also weak and shaky with it... it doesn't help when i eat...has also been persistant today.. i will let you know if they're still around tomorrow....

[Altostrata]

Be sure to drink enough water.

 

How is your therapy proceeding regarding health anxiety?

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata those feelings are new.. and you said to let you know. No therapy ... And not complaining just informing you as you asked.  I am drinking plenty of water.

I'm not scared of these symptoms I'd rather have these than the tortorous anxieties. I got excited because those were easing since updosing. Then bam new ones...   However, they all do suck. Hah. And I am getting better at riding the waves. I think when I'm trying to let you know what's going on you're taking it as complaining when really I'm just doing what you ask and letting you know. 

Thank you for all your help Alto, I mean that. 

[Altostrata]

I do want to know how you're doing but, being pressed for time, what's important to me is significant new symptoms, not the old ones that we know will come and go, lasting perhaps a few hours. Thanks.

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata Not complaining, just feel very stuck. once again when i had updosed two awesome days and now the anxiety is back and the new symptoms i feel absolutely awful and don't know what to do please help.

[Altostrata]

@Momoffour Please stop with the isolated complaints. I need to see whatever symptoms are bothering you in context.

 

I have to ask you the same old questions to get the context: When does this anxiety occur? How do you feel before and after you take your doses? 

 

Plus, the usual: Need to see those daily notes.

 

It would be very wonderful if you anticipated this and reported any symptoms that bother you in context so I didn't have to ask every time.

 

 

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata yes ma'am I'm just losing hope my mother has had me on a plethora of drugs over the years. I feel like death is my only option. I can't find anyone that's been severely drugged like me and reinstatement worked. I've only felt worse and worse since I've reinstated. I will do your notes. 

[Momoffour]

The anxiety has occured all day today. Before and after sertraline. I felt the same before and after. Overwhelmed head feeling, weird vision, muscle tension, stomach feels full and hurts, nausea, now diarrhea all day. 

The stomach pain and muscle tension are new since 3mg and also occuring all day on top of everything else. Last night I woke up at 9:30 pm and couldn't go back to sleep until 12-1 am. 

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata 3/10

5:30pm ate dinner. Same symptoms but now my stomach and back hurt, that is a new symptom.

 

6:30pm overwhelmed head feeling, brain anxiety, light sensitivity, nausea, restless legs, crying

 

8:00pm  tired went to bed

 

9:30pm woke with anxiety and heart racing, shaky, weak arms, anxiety in arms. Woke up off and on until 5:30am.

 

 

3/11

5:30am same symptoms. Sat up from bed and had a loose stool accident took shower

 

7:45am same symptoms, back and stomach hurt bad. cried.

 

9:00 eat a snack. same symptoms 

 

9:30 same as above stomach and back hurts mainly shoulder blade, collar bone pressure,

 

10:00 am Ate Lunch. Salame symptoms. Had nausea.

 

11:00am 3mg sertraline anxiety and overwhelmed head is gone, back hurts, stomach feels full, weird vision is less. Ate a snack as I felt hungry.

 

12:00pm same symptoms as above but now I have restless legs and arms 

 

2:00pm feeling better.

 

3:00pm Symptoms back and having diarrhea.

 

I have 3 new symptoms. My back and stomach hurt bad and now I'm having diarrhea.

 

I am also due for my menstrual cycle in a few days. 

[Momoffour]

I will do my notes everyday from here on. 

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata i'm doing my notes and condensing them as much as possible. If my symptoms are changing every 10 mins and up and down what do you suggest I do for the notes? just keep condensing them and only put what i feel within that hour even if it changes in 10 mins or not? Thank you 

[Momoffour]

3/11

4:50pm ate dinner. Same symptoms as yesterday.

 

8:45pm anxiety finally calmed down. Went to bed.

9pm fell asleep woke up a few times and finally got up at 5:30 am.

 

3/12

 

5:30am woke up. Same symptoms 3/10

 

6:00am eat breakfast. Same symptoms. 4/10

 

8:00am anxiety finally subsided, same symptoms otherwise

 

8:15 anxiety back pain 4/10 and still same symptoms as above.

 

8:45am ate a snack same symptoms and freezing cold 10/10 brain overwhelmed 10/10

 

10:00am eat lunch. Same symptoms

 

11:00am 3mg sertraline same symptoms

 

11:30am feeling better except now restless legs but all at 4/10

 

12:00pm ate snack. Same symptoms and stomach and back hurting bad.

 

1:00pm  Nauseous.

 

2:00pm feel weak, less weird, stomach pain, muscle tension in back arms, and legs, some anxiety,restless legs and arms, crying.

 

3:30pm anxiety ramping up, same symptoms.

 

4:00 pm ate dinner. Same symptoms and nausea.

 

5:00pm nausea subsided but same symptoms as above.

 

No diarrhea today but still weird bowels 

[Altostrata]

Please note symptoms when they are the most prominent or absent.

 

I have no idea what you mean by "same symptoms". Please describe them at least once every time you post a day of notes. Then I'll know what "same symptoms" means.

 

Are you eating full meals? Are you losing weight?

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata yes I'm eating full meals I have been losing weight since the beginning of withdrawal although I believe I've been at the same weight no gain or lose now for a couple of weeks. I put same symptoms to say it's still the same and then added ones. 

[Momoffour]

Doing my best with notes they come and go so fast 

[Altostrata]

I have no idea what you mean by "same symptoms". You generate a lot of complaints.

[Momoffour]

@Altostrata that is before condensing my notes 

3/11

4:50pm ate dinner feel little better with anxiety subsiding back hurts, diarrhea, collar bone pressure, weird vision, overwhelmed head feeling, heartbeat is slow but beating hard, cold, still a bit internally shaky like vibrating and weak

 

6pm same symptoms heartbeat in head, sleepy eyes burn, yawning

6:46pm mostly still internal vibrating…. Weird vision

 

8:00pm same symptoms, anxiety, itchy, tired, burning eyes waiting for it to pass so I can go to bed

8:45pm anxiety has finally calmed some going to lay down and try to sleep

9pm fell asleep woke up at 1 and then a couple other times awake at 5:30

 

3/12

 

5:30am weird vision, shaky, back/shoulder hurts, some anxiety 3/10

6:00am eat breakfast and take birth control same symptoms, brain anxiety 4/10

 

7:00am weird vision subsided 1/10 same symptoms, groin pain, cold, muscle tension in legs, stomach hurts feels full

 

8:00am anxiety finally subsided, same symptoms otherwise

 

8:15 anxiety came back 4/10, shaky, itchy thigh, weird vision, leg muscle tension, stomach hurts and feels full 10/10, back hurts 10/10, nausea, collar bone pressure

 

8:45am ate a snack same symptoms and  freezing cold 10/10 brain overwhelmed feeling 10/10

 

10:00am eat lunch drink bottle of water  anxiety itching and freezing cold subsided, same symptoms

 

10:30am same symptoms anxiety back, weird vision

11:00am 3mg sertraline same symptoms

 

11:30am feeling better collarbone pressure, leg muscle tension, overwhelmed head feeling, weird vision anxiety, restless legs but all at 4/10

 

12:00pm anxiety, leg muscle tension subsided…Same symptoms, stomach feels full, feel weird shaky and weak. Eating a snack to see if it helps it helped the shaky and that’s it

1:00pm  weird vision,  some anxiety, feel really weird like wanna go crazy with the feeling and weak now, Drank some water collar bone pressure,stomach feels full and hurts, chest kind of hurts, nausea, legs and arms feel weak, muscle tension in arms, head feels gone (which could be the weird feeling)

2:00pm feel weak, less weird, stomach pain, muscle tension in back arms, and legs, some anxiety,restless legs and arms, crying,

3:00pm Feel somewhat better for maybe 10 mins, Weird vision, shaky, anxiety 3/10, collar bone pressure

3:30pm anxiety ramping up, same symptoms

 

4:00 pm ate dinner early, eyes having a hard time adjusting from outside light to inside, anxiety, nausea,

 

5:00pm nausea subsided same symptoms, overwhelmed head feeling, weird vision