Comecloser80: CT Mirtazapine 15mg and Amitriptyline 20mg

[Comecloser80]

1 minute ago, Dutchsarah said:

I'm only 10 weeks out. Have you been able to function these months? Like work? 

I had to quit job since I stopped as I was in full blown WD that I had never experienced in my life. 
I still feel very tired even without doing much. I still find it very hard whenever waves hits me.

Biggest issue for me is Sleep. It is better compare to before but still then I am stuck in a pattern like I have only certain window where I can sleep(10pm-4am). I cannot sleep after 4:00am or I can nap regardless of how much I slept during night. 
I would have been cope with WD much better if I can sleep few hrs more in the morning rather than abruptly waking up at 4:00am. 
I am really hating 4:00am ATM.😏
 

[Dutchsarah]

I'm sorry you had to quit your job, I'm not working at the moment either. Yes the early morning waking is very hard. 

I'm trying to do very easy and light stretches/yoga before bed and that seems the help a little at times. Accept when I have a jetlag!

I hope you will be able to nap again soon! 

[Comecloser80]

Update: 5 months

 

There has been improvement in most of the symptoms.
-Internal vibrations are less frequent intense and short lived. 

-I still get muscle spams on my thigh and shoulders.

-Brain tingles.

-My eyes are itchy and watery since last few days.

-Stomach flutters has down in intensity.

-Fatigue has gone away completely but I do still feel tired even without doing much activity.

 

One of the major symptoms that is lingering is sleep.

My sleep fluctuates a lot between 4 to 6 hrs. 

Lately, I have been waking up around 2:30am and struggle I fall back asleep.
I feel like I am awake and dreaming at the same time. I can’t nap during daytime and I don’t have any sleepy ques.

 

I am really hoping and praying that my sleep will improve with time and my early morning awakening will stop.

 

 

 

 

[Dutchsarah]

 

It's wonderful to read some of your symptoms have improved. I'm sure sleep will follow too. 

I know the sensation you describe well, being asleep and awake at the same time. I would often lay in bed listening to a podcast and after a few hours I thought I hadn't slept at all, but was in some sort of weird wake/sleep state. Scary and exhausting. I used to grab my blanket and try and continue my sleep in my backyard on a lounger, somehow the fresh air made a difference. 

Hang in there we are all going to get there and when we do it's going to be marvelous! 

 

[Dutchsarah]

@Puraehow are you doing?

[Comecloser80]

@Dutchsarah Thank you for checking on me. Nothing much has changed so far. Symptoms comes and goes as it pleases. Sometimes internal vibration is very strong , specially when I lay down.Sore muscles specially thighs, lower leg, shoulders, muscle spasms on legs, shoulder. Head and brain doesn’t feel normal. Looks like healing will take long time for me. 
 

Just tired, exhausted and frustrated.

Early waking, broken sleep , awake-dream at the same time state is still there. Napping is still out of the topic for me.

 

I am having to go for a procedure on Wednesday that includes general anaesthesia , I am bit worried that it may take me back to square one.

 

How are you? Has anything improved for you? 

[Dutchsarah]

I'm sorry you are not seeing much progress just yet, but hang in there it will happen!

I'm in a clear wave and window pattern, i have windows that last about 2 days and then a wave for 3 days.

Ik thinking about signing up for the PAWS support group on Angela peackock's website, do you know about her? 

 

Good luck with your procedure! Even if it will bring on a wave it will subside again!

We just need time. 

[Comecloser80]

@Dutchsarah I am afraid that I am not aware of Angela peacock. Please let me know if you happen to join and whether and how it helps.
 

but again, I think only TIME can heal us. I hope this lonely and torturing journey will end soon for us.
 

 

[Comecloser80]

Logging onto my journal:

 

Just came home after cystoscopy under general anaesthesia.

I spoke about my concern relating my WD symptoms to anaesthetic Dr, so I was put asleep using propofol and low dose opioid(fentanyl).

I am hoping it won’t cause set back or flare up my symptoms.

[Dutchsarah]

Hi @Purae I was wondering how you have been doing after your procedure. Did the anesthesia set off a wave? 

[Comecloser80]

Hi @Dutchsarah , I experienced Internal vibration, whole body shakiness and restlessness(May be akathisia) , I woke up middle of the night with some electrical type sensation going through my brain which was very scary, had multi dreams which wake me up. It seem to calm down a bit now but still my sleep is very broken. 
 

I did use little cannabis for two nights to help with sleep.
 

How are you doing so far? What are your symptoms? Do you experience akathisia , internal vibrations, body shakiness? Are you having broken sleep every night or it’s just during wave? 
 

I am really worried and scared that I won’t be normal again. 
 

 

[Dutchsarah]

I'm sorry your suffering. I have the electric type sensation as well. My symptoms are mostly mental though. Extreme chemical anxiety, neuro emotions racing thoughts and intrusive thoughts. My sleep has gotten better. 

 

I'm following Angela Peackock on YouTube and Instagram now (she is somewhat a specialist in the field of withdrawal) 

She said something that really gave me hope, she said that 99.9% of people recover eventually. 

We only used anti depressant for a short while, and it seems like the worst case scenarios: people that are still struggling after 2 years. But even those people have seen significant progress after that long. 

 

I listened to an episode of the podcast "let's talk withdrawal" and there was a girl who had a extreme severe reaction after one pill. Even though her story was insanely devastating, it still gave me a sense of hope. We are all going to be on the other side of this one day. 

I downloaded the audiobooks of Claire Weekes today and I'm enjoying it so far. 

@LostInCanada recommended her books on another thread and said something very inspiring. Something like: you can either fight or heal, if you fight all the time all your energy is going to fighting and not healing. That was very insightful for me.

 

I'm in a window right now so I'm probably just being overly optimistic. I think the hardest part is that when in a wave we are simply convinced that we are never ever getting better. 

 

Do you have clear waves and windows?

 

I'm supposed to have rotator cuff surgery in 2 months but I'm super nervous that  I won't be able to handle it at all. The recovery takes 8 months. I'm super scared that the anesthesia will set off a huge wave. 

 

Do you feel like your symptoms are alot worse now after your procedure? 

 

Take care, sending you positive energy. You got this! 

 

[Comecloser80]

Hi @Dutchsarah I stopped medication on 7th of Jan and I had surgery on 16th of Feb , I had to take opioid for few days for pain and antibiotics for 5 days. I experienced heightened WD symptoms after I had surgery, I was in a very dark place for couple of months . 
 

As my nervous system is damage , everything tends to make WD symptoms worst. For example ,Lack of sleep, overdoing things etc. 

 

if I were you, I would try to hold surgery as long as possible if it’s not very urgent as it will give our nervous system time to heal more. 
 

But if it’s urgent , I wouldn’t worry about WD as it might take a while for us to recover. 
 

Lastly, is your sleep broken or do you sleep uninterrupted? 

Thank you for Angela peacock thing, I shall look into it. I feel hopeless when my wave is intense. 
 

I wish you well. Please let know how you doing . I feel really nice to talk to someone who understands WD.

I am hoping our case is not that severe as no moderator from SA seems to be interested in our topic. 
 

I am hoping and praying for everyone including you and me. 

[Dutchsarah]

My sleep is interrupted but I can get a solid 7 hours most nights. 

I have 2 little kids so even without withdrawal I often wake up a few times. 

 

I don't think the moderators can give us much advise as we are not tapering. The only thing to do is be patient.... 😞

 

Do you feel like you have made some improvements in these 5 months? 

 

 

 

 

[Comecloser80]

@Dutchsarah I am so happy that you can sleep solid 7 hrs , that clearly indicates you are healing.

 

I definitely feel improved as I said I was in a very dark place earlier which has lifted, but waves still hits me hard and there is no pattern in my waves and windows.

 

I think antibiotics and wound from surgery played a big role causing set back rather than anaesthesia. 

 

I had to be on antibiotics twice in last 3 months or so due to surgery and my thumb injury. 
 

I am hoping to see much improvement at the end of this year.
 

I wish you well. 

 

 

 

 

 

[jack9]

Hey @Purae

 

I saw that you had some ear fullness. Can ia ask you if you had pain too ?

Also did the fullness get better by now ?

[Comecloser80]

On 6/20/2023 at 12:54 AM, jack9 said:

Hey @Purae

 

I saw that you had some ear fullness. Can ia ask you if you had pain too ?

Also did the fullness get better by now ?

Hi @jack9 I don’t  remember experiencing any pain . 

It went away completely. 
 

 

[jack9]

Oh great that it went away !

It still not for me so i may need more time and it has been a year.

 

Are u finding anything that helps with muscle stiffness ? 

[Comecloser80]

@jack9 i experienced fatigue and muscle soreness specifically on my legs(thighs) and calves . I am taking magnesium glycinate which I am not sure whether it’s helping but I have been taking it regularly since I stopped AD.

 

I did bath with epsom salt which seems to relax a bit.

 

My lingering symptoms ATM is sleep. It’s broken and I can’t sleep past 4:00 am and unable to nap during day. 

How is your sleep? Are you having any difficulties with sleep? 
 

 

 

 

 

 

[jack9]

At contrast to you, i didn't have any problems with sleep but i had/have a lot of other symptoms.

 

You are close to recovery if this is your only problem. 

[Comecloser80]

On 6/26/2023 at 8:22 PM, jack9 said:

 

You are close to recovery if this is your only problem. 

@jack9 Thank you for your kind words.

I had lot of other symptoms at the beginning of my WD but the most lingering ones are akathisia(inner restlessness) , inner vibration and sleep. 
Inner vibration is still there but has done down a lot in intensity.Nowadays , I feel bit weird sensation in my brain , like mild-electricity , vibration , hard to explain. 
I hope we both recover with TIME.

 

[MichelleE]

Well I'm so glad I found this post today!  I only took amitriptyline for 14 days, had very bad side effects so stopped CT.  I knew nothing about this medication, it was given to me to help with TMJ.  Well I am on month 8 of WD.  What I am now left with is head pressure, anxiety that is through the roof!  panic (although the panic has gotten better after conducting a course), neck pain.  I sleep well now, I didn't sleep for months and months.  I do have some odd nights that I find it difficult but mostely it's good sleep now.  I take magnesium L-threonate.   All the head pressure and pain I could handle but the anxiety is what really makes it hard for me.  I used to be so easy going and never suffered like this.  I find it hard to even go to the supermarket these days.  I still work, I have pushed through with that and continue to work.  I do have an amazing boss that allows me time when I need it.  

 

I get windows and waves now but they are like 2 days of I feel good and then i'm in a wave for 4 days.  This last wave has now lasted a week so it's a big one.   

 

I am currently working on my anxiety, daily affirmations and on line course with The Anxiety Guy.  Lets hope one day we can all put this behind us and live a free and happy life.  

[MichelleE]

Just now, MichelleE said:

Well I'm so glad I found this post today!  I only took amitriptyline for 14 days, had very bad side effects so stopped CT.  I knew nothing about this medication, it was given to me to help with TMJ.  Well I am on month 8 of WD.  What I am now left with is head pressure, anxiety that is through the roof!  panic (although the panic has gotten better after conducting a course), neck pain.  I sleep well now, I didn't sleep for months and months.  I do have some odd nights that I find it difficult but mostely it's good sleep now.  I take magnesium L-threonate.   All the head pressure and pain I could handle but the anxiety is what really makes it hard for me.  I used to be so easy going and never suffered like this.  I find it hard to even go to the supermarket these days.  I still work, I have pushed through with that and continue to work.  I do have an amazing boss that allows me time when I need it.  

 

I get windows and waves now but they are like 2 days of I feel good and then i'm in a wave for 4 days.  This last wave has now lasted a week so it's a big one.   

 

I am currently working on my anxiety, daily affirmations and on line course with The Anxiety Guy.  Lets hope one day we can all put this behind us and live a free and happy life.  

  oh and I still have Dizziness - like on a rocking boat

[Comecloser80]

@MichelleE I am so sorry that you are still suffering being on it for such a short time. 

I had many WD symptoms at the beginning but most people f them has lessened. Now being almost 6 months out , I am having brain vibration, electric sensation, inner vibration, broken sleep , early morning awakening and lost ability to nap, sore legs , arms and lack of energy.

I experienced massive chemical during earlier months of WD. I took supplement ashwagandha ksm-66 which seems to help me calm down. 
I felt dizzy only while I took Amitriptyline but not after quitting. 
 

Were you on any other different medication before Amitriptyline? 

 

 

[MichelleE]

14 hours ago, Purae said:

@MichelleE I am so sorry that you are still suffering being on it for such a short time. 

I had many WD symptoms at the beginning but most people f them has lessened. Now being almost 6 months out , I am having brain vibration, electric sensation, inner vibration, broken sleep , early morning awakening and lost ability to nap, sore legs , arms and lack of energy.

I experienced massive chemical during earlier months of WD. I took supplement ashwagandha ksm-66 which seems to help me calm down. 
I felt dizzy only while I took Amitriptyline but not after quitting. 
 

Were you on any other different medication before Amitriptyline? 

 

 

 

yes I still have most of those WD as well but not so much the inner vibration.  I did have that but that has gone.  It's more just in my head now, dizziness and fullness in the head and neck.  I do get a sore left arm a lot when I'm in a bad wave.  I think the blurry vision is horrible too.  I didn't take any other medication at all.  Only other thing I have ever taken was antibiotics or paracetomol or Ibprofen.  I am sensative to medications so I do now know to be very careful in future.  I hope all these WD's go very soon.  

[Comecloser80]

It’s a good sign that many of your symptoms have lessened or gone away. I am pretty sure that the remaining ones will go away as well. 
 

We will have to keep our hopes alive through out. I wish you for your soon recovery.

 

please keep updated. I feel nice talking to someone who knows how it is like be on this journey.

 

 

[Comecloser80]

Update:25 weeks (Almost 6 months)

 

Withdrawal symptoms:

-Sore temples(gone).

-inner restlessness( lessened a lot, some days completely gone).

-Shakiness( lessened a lot).

-Fatigue(completely gone).

-Morning anxiety(extremely rare nowadays).

-Tiredness(lessened).

-Crying spells (very rare).

-stomach tingling done down a lot.

-muscle spasms (very rare).

 

Current symptoms:

-sore legs and arms.

-Brain vibrations/ electrical sensation that comes and goes.

-SLEEP: I have not slept past 4:30am since I stopped, no nap, it’s still very broken , some nights I wake up at 2:30 am or 3:00am and cannot fall back asleep. 

-Multiple dreams that wakes me up.

 

I have been using cannabis since last 20 years and never had any problems except for binge eating and good sleep. I have been using it on and off since I stopped taking medication but it won’t help with my sleep. 
 

No alcohol since 10th of March 2023.

[Comecloser80]

On 7/1/2023 at 4:42 AM, Purae said:

It’s a good sign that many of your symptoms have lessened or gone away. I am pretty sure that the remaining ones will go away as well. 
 

We will have to keep our hopes alive through out. I wish you for your soon recovery.

 

please keep updated. I feel nice talking to someone who knows how it is like be on this journey.

 

 

@MichelleE

[Walleebug]

@Purae good for you!  I'm so happy to see you're doing better.  I just hit 8 months off and the inner vibrations keeps getting better and better.  I can still feel it even in the  base of my brain but it's such a like vibration now that it doesn't bother me much at all.  I'm positive it will be completely gone someday.   

[Comecloser80]

29 minutes ago, Walleebug said:

@Purae good for you!  I'm so happy to see you're doing better.  I just hit 8 months off and the inner vibrations keeps getting better and better.  I can still feel it even in the  base of my brain but it's such a like vibration now that it doesn't bother me much at all.  I'm positive it will be completely gone someday.   

@Walleebug Thank you for stopping by.I am really happy to see your progress in WD being on it for such a long time. 
It seems like the duration being on the drug doesn’t make much difference when it comes to WD.

I would say one of my lingering, frustrating , depressive, tiring symptoms is SLEEP. I can cope with other symptoms but SLEEP. 
I am really praying for it to improve. 
 

I wish you well in your journey.

[Walleebug]

@Purae I'm not sure duration matters much either.  It seems once the drug has done its damage it takes about the same time to heal regardless.   

 

I still have the same sleep issues your having but it's much easier to deal with once the mental withdrawal calms down.  I've been getting a couple 7-8 hour nights and a couple nights of sleeping til 4 am and a couple nights of waking after 2 hours and then not being able to fall back asleep.  

[Comecloser80]

@Walleebug when you say you sleep 7-8 hrs , is it interrupted or uninterrupted? 

[Walleebug]

@Purae uninterrupted 

[kmac000]

@Puraethanks for being so detailed on this thread, I am 3 1/2 months into a horrible withdrawal from mirtazapine. At the doctors advice I went cold turkey after using Mirt for six months, and then he tried a cocktail of other drugs to recover. Truly horrible.
 

Did you feel like you had different stages through your withdrawal? I felt like the first three months were characterized by high anxiety, almost a manic state, where I couldn’t eat, sleep, or even sit down for more than a couple seconds. In this new phase, I’m extremely dizzy, fatigued, and depressed. Even the slightest bit of exercise increases my symptoms tremendously the next day (which sucks because working out is my joy).

 

I’m able to sleep which is fortunate, but I’m also taking 7.5 mg of a benzo to help get to sleep. So I know eventually I’ll have to get off of that. For now I’m taking it one thing at a time. Does anybody else have that intense dizziness? Everything else I can cope with, but walking around in a daze is so depressing and scary. 

 

Your thread gives me hope that I just need to continue to hang in there and push through it. I’ve been so tempted to reinstate, but at this point, I think the best thing to heal is time and rest.

 

Thanks to everybody who contributed on this thread, although it’s terrifying to see how horrid these drugs have affected our lives, it’s good to know there are other people going through the same thing.

[Comecloser80]

6 months update:

 

I stopped all medication on 7th of Jan. I experienced horrible things since then, sore temples , chronic insomnia , panic attacks , internal vibrations, external shakiness, loss of appetite (came back fully), sometimes diarrhoea, constipation (once), lip tremors, stomach flutters, passing lot of gas, chronic fatigue (lasted 2 months), morning dread/anxiety, morning shakiness, racing thoughts, suicidal thoughts, dark depression ( never felt anything like that earlier in my life), extreme restlessness, agitation, crying spells almost every day, muscle spasms, sore legs(thigh and calves), lost napping ability, total hopelessness, brain fog, lack of concentration, genital spasms.There may be some that I don’t even remember.

 

At the moment, lot of symptoms have lessened, the most lingering one is Sleep.

Sleep- I smoke cannabis to help me with sleep still then I can’t sleep more than broken 6-7hrs a night . I don’t tend to fall back asleep after 4:00am, I tend to wake up different times, 2:30am, 3:00 am or so but waking up at 4:00 am (regardless of time I fall asleep) has been constant throughout since I stopped . IT MAKES ME WONDER IF ITS STILL WD or something else, or will I ever recover my sleep ? Napping is still out of the question regardless of how much I have slept during night.

 

-Brain vibrations/ electric sensation is still there but seems to have lessened.

-internal vibrations has lessened a lot compare to before, most of the time I don’t even feel it.

 

-I still feel shaky sometimes.

 

-I never exercise heavily in my life but I use to walk 3-5kms , sometimes yoga for 30mins and use to have physical work but now even 2-3 km of walk makes me so tired and not being able to walk 1-2 a week.

 

-My thighs and calves muscles are sore even without doing much. 
 

-I still feel bad/hard almost half of the day.

 

I am thankful that my condition has improved a lot compare to earlier months and hoping that my remaining issue will improve with TIME.

 

NOTE:

I had surgery on 16th of Feb ( bladder neck incision) , anaesthesia and antibiotics, opioids *4 , Temazepam *1.

 

Injury: local anaesthesia, antibiotics.

 

Cystoscopy 14th June: anaesthesia 

 

@kmac000

I am sorry that you are still having issues this far. I have not felt dizzy during my withdrawal which I am thankful for . Symptoms does changed for me during last 6 months, I even had few days/moments where I felt I was completely recovered.

 

Nothing here is medical advice, I read other people using Benzo is more dangerous and addictive and can cause severe WD.If I were you , I would seek other alternatives for Sleep. I recently watched one episode from Angela peacock where guy mentioned about horrible nerve burning.
My intention here is not to scare you but to alert about Benzo use.

 

You may want to see if low histamine diet or DOA supplements ( not pharmaceuticals anti-histamine) helps you with dizziness. I see lot of people struggling with histamine issue as Mirt being the strongest antihistamine. 

I wish you well. Please keep posted.

 

 

 

[kmac000]

@Purae

Thank you so much for your detailed comments, I'm so sorry to hear what you went through, but excited about your progress and recovery. Crazy that so many of us experience the same symptoms. As you mentioned, though, these things shift and heal with time.

 

I had never heard about histamine intolerance, but actually, it makes a lot of sense. In my first two months of recovery, similar to you, I had a horrible time sleeping. I ended up taking 50mg Benadryl nightly to try and make it through the night, which I now realize was replacing the histamine interaction that Mirtazapine was producing. After discovering the dangers of long-term use of Benadryl, I eventually weaned myself off, but it came at a cost. My symptoms increased and sleep became extremely restless. It wasn't until I started the benzo regime that I could normalize sleep. I'll definitely give DAO and a low histamine diet a try and see if that helps. Excellent suggestion!

 

I also 100% agree with you on the use of benzos. I've read on different post in the forum however that it's best to start tapering when you feel the symptoms from the first experience have decreased. If I start tapering benzos now I'm not going to be sure what symptoms are coming from the mirtazapine withdrawal or what is new. We are all caught in this horrible cocktail of chemicals, and it takes a long time to fully transition. I look forward to the day I start my benzo taper, but know from experience that I can only take this one chemical at a time. 

I wish you well on your sleep journey. I wish I had some amazing advice to give you, but honestly, I think we all struggle. Even when we're lucky enough to fall asleep, the vivid dreams are insane and often wake me up in panic. I have found that having a schedule prior to sleep helps. I normally take a natural sleep aid, two hours before bed, and then start winding down with yoga, self massage, and other guided wind-down exercises (see below). I'm sure this is nothing new to you and I don't want to preach (especially as I still use a Benzo to finally drift off) But it might be worth a look...I've found the following YouTube videos and techniques helpful to reduce pre-sleep anxiety and increase quality of sleep:

• Sleep Scheduling - Lots of good tips. Dr Mandell is awesome, I highly recommend any of his videos. You may have tried most of these, but it's a good starting point. 
• Yin Yoga - Says it's for hips, but I found it to be relaxing before sleep. Adam Fields also has a number of great videos, definitely explore his channel. 
• Vagus Nerve Activation - Looks weird but helps with some of the gut pain/boating/gas, decent channel. The channel is very "new age" healing, some are a little too out there for me, but others are relaxing and help. 
• Brain Tapping - Again, looks weird, but helps to calm down and release some of those trigger points. I do this throughout the day and it seems to work. 
• Acupuncture - If you can find a high-quality clinic near you, I found my best nights of sleep come after acupuncture. Unfortunately it's expensive and not covered by my insurance, but I go twice a month and it seems to help. 
• Baths - Epsom salt baths are also fantastic wind downs if you're not too anxious. Sometimes I can get in and relax, sometimes I can't. However I notice when I'm having a good day and can take a bath, my sleep is always better. 

I hope that we all get better soon and thank you again for your input. Very helpful and encouraging!