Flowers: tapering citalopram

[joy2730]

Sorry you are not well Flowers, and your husband, but you do sound more stable re the venlafaxine withdrawal and settling back with citalopram.

 

Hope the asthma settles, that must be awful. 

 

Take care Flowers

 

Joy 

[Dan998]

I don't think man-made noise does any of us any good, far too activating, give me nature any day. The gentle sound of bird song, waves ebbing and flowing on pebble beach, the wind rustling in the trees are so calming.

 

i just searched for the bee eaters on Google. They look wonderful. Would love to see them in real life.

[Flowers]

Well the dreaded cold/chest virus has gone (I gave it to my husband )  and I didn't give in to panic and take the AB's or any other stuff! I did take one paracetamol when I had a fever one night. So I am pleased and this is a good sign because it means my anxiety is more under control.  Normally I panic and rush to the medicine cabinet!

 

 

 

I was worried the virus might bring on a wave but I have had a good day today. Did some light  gardening/sweeping , swam and cooked dinner. Even had a lovely afternoon nap.

 

I am very excited about our weather forecast. We have forecast a couple of days of fairly heavy rain! We haven't had any for months and so badly need it. Due to start tomorrow and if it happens I am going outside to stand in it until I am soaked through!  I love the smell of the earth after rainfall!

 

We have the Spanish cycling race - Vuelta - passing right by us on Thursday so hope the rain is over by then as really want to see it when it's dry!

 

So, on the whole things are going OK.  I feel like doing things and getting out and about.  Shaking not so bad at the moment.

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

[direstraits]

glad to read you're feeling better,Flowers.

hope you enjoy the rain.

take care,ds  xx

[Martina23]

I also love the rain very much!

[Flowers]

This last week has been good to me!

 

For anyone reading this who is in a wave and feeling bad please be encouraged  that things can and will change. A few weeks ago I was feeling so ill in a wave and at my wits end. I am now in a very nice window and getting some respite from all the horrible symptoms especially nausea and shaking in my case. 

 

We had a few days of rain and thunder and lightning and I went and stood in it until I was soaked through! The temps have dropped a little so sleeping better.

 

The cycle race La Vuelta was so exciting. It was a fine day for them travelling through our town so we went along with our Union Jack flags and got into the spirit of it all.

 

On top of this managed to go out for 2 dinners  with friends. No nausea! Enjoyed getting dressed up to go out and engaging in the conversations that flowed. 

 

Don't know when the next wave will hit me so am savouring every moment of feeling good.

 

Love from Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

[Flowers]

P.S.

 

Still thinking of all of you out there that are not in such a good place as me right now.

 

Hoping you feel peace and healing soon.

 

Love Flowers xxx

[JS11]

Thank you, Flowers.  How kind of you.  New here.

take care,

JS

[JS11]

PS. I love the rain too.  So refreshing...Though not too much as I have lived in places where it is unrelenting.

Enjoy your day/night

take care,

JS 

[direstraits]

this sounds wonderful,Flowers,so happy for you!

hope it continues!

love,ds  xx

[Flowers]

19 hours ago, direstraits said:

this sounds wonderful,Flowers,so happy for you!

hope it continues!

love,ds  xx

Thanks DS

 

Well we never know how long it will last but it sure is nice to have a break!

 

How are things with you?

 

Love from Flowers xxx

[direstraits]

26 minutes ago, Flowers said:

How are things with you?

still up and down,sometimes the anxiety feels unbearable...not too good today....just wonder how much more  I can take sometimes.

worry about being permanently damaged from this.

sorry I'm such a downer.

thanks for being there for me

love,ds  xxx

[Frogie]

Florida wears:

 

I'm so happy you are feeling better and got the chance to "dance in the rain".

 

I've been very emotional and lots of anxiety because of my baby.

 

It's been in the 90's here, no rain. Wish it would cool down.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[Flowers]

34 minutes ago, direstraits said:

still up and down,sometimes the anxiety feels unbearable...not too good today....just wonder how much more  I can take sometimes.

worry about being permanently damaged from this.

sorry I'm such a downer.

thanks for being there for me

love,ds  xxx

So sorry DS. Anxiety is awful. I get to breaking point too sometimes. We are strong though DS and have got this far through really bad times.

We can do this - holding your hand across the ocean.

 

Hugs Flowers xxx

[Flowers]

12 minutes ago, Frogie said:

Florida wears:

 

I'm so happy you are feeling better and got the chance to "dance in the rain".

 

I've been very emotional and lots of anxiety because of my baby.

 

It's been in the 90's here, no rain. Wish it would cool down.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

Hi Frogie

 

Yes the rain was a welcome break from all the heat. Sun out again now and hot but not nearly as bad as August was.

 

I am thinking of you and Brownie all the time. Have there been any improvements?

 

Love and hugs

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

[Frogie]

1 hour ago, Flowers said:

Hi Frogie

 

Yes the rain was a welcome break from all the heat. Sun out again now and hot but not nearly as bad as August was.

 

I am thinking of you and Brownie all the time. Have there been any improvements?

 

Love and hugs

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

I talked with my vet yesterday. She put her on an antibiotic, no diarrhea but she is constipated now (at least today). But her nose is cold and wet and she's barking. She is drinking more water and eating a little better today. The vet said if she was very dehydrated her kidney and liver numbers would be high. She wants blood work done on her in a couple of weeks and we will go from there.

 

Thanks for praying for her. I just love my baby so much.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

 

 

[apace41]

On 9/2/2017 at 3:37 PM, Flowers said:

For anyone reading this who is in a wave and feeling bad please be encouraged  that things can and will change. A few weeks ago I was feeling so ill in a wave and at my wits end. I am now in a very nice window and getting some respite from all the horrible symptoms especially nausea and shaking in my case. 

 

 

This is great news, Flowers!  So pleased for you.  

 

On 9/2/2017 at 3:37 PM, Flowers said:

We had a few days of rain and thunder and lightning and I went and stood in it until I was soaked through!

 

Glad you got your wish!

 

Time will continue to heal you.  

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Frogie]

Hi Flowers:

 

I just read JC's thread, and it was beautiful.

 

We all came upon this site to get help, and have become friends. I truly hope someday we can all meet for a reunion when we are all healed. We have all supported each other, probably more than anyone else has in our lives.

 

Thank you for the kind words about Brownie. I know she is a 16 year old chihuahua, but I'm not ready to give her up yet. I hope God hears me and helps her, just for a while longer.

 

Hope you are doing well.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[Flowers]

1 hour ago, Frogie said:

Hi Flowers:

 

I just read JC's thread, and it was beautiful.

 

We all came upon this site to get help, and have become friends. I truly hope someday we can all meet for a reunion when we are all healed. We have all supported each other, probably more than anyone else has in our lives.

 

Thank you for the kind words about Brownie. I know she is a 16 year old chihuahua, but I'm not ready to give her up yet. I hope God hears me and helps her, just for a while longer.

 

Hope you are doing well.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

Awwww Frogie - you are so sweet. Wish I could have a good old chat with you over a coffee.

 

If I won the lottery big time I would charter a plane to take me around the world to visit all you lovely people if you would have me. That would be inspite of my travel anxiety and anyone would be welcome to hop onboard and join in the trip!

 

I really really do understand what you are going through. I have been in your shoes with my animals over the years. I wasn't in WD though and was in my lovely old home town. Brownie is such a comfort to you being away from your true home and not feeling good in WD. I reckon she will want to stay guarding you for a while yet.

 

Keep your chin up Frogie. The situation seems better than it was last week and tell Brownie to keep 'fighting old girl.'

 

Hugs from Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

[Frogie]

1 minute ago, Flowers said:

Awwww Frogie - you are so sweet. Wish I could have a good old chat with you over a coffee.

 

If I won the lottery big time I would charter a plane to take me around the world to visit all you lovely people if you would have me. That would be inspite of my travel anxiety and anyone would be welcome to hop onboard and join in the trip!

 

I really really do understand what you are going through. I have been in your shoes with my animals over the years. I wasn't in WD though and was in my lovely old home town. Brownie is such a comfort to you being away from your true home and not feeling good in WD. I reckon she will want to stay guarding you for a while yet.

 

Keep your chin up Frogie. The situation seems better than it was last week and tell Brownie to keep 'fighting old girl.'

 

Hugs from Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

You are very sweet Flowers:

 

I'm sure you don't get on my thread to read about a dog again, and again. I just can't help it. Like you said she's all I have in this awful place. I'm being selfish. I want her around a few more years, but I would never let her suffer or be in pain.

 

I lost my male chihuahua 7 years ago to epilepsy. I wasn't in WD, but I miss him everyday.

 

I hope one of us would win the lottery, then we could all travel to meet each other. Everyone here is more like family than my own family.

 

It's nice that we are here for each other in good and bad.

 

If you ever decide to travel, my home is your home. I already know we would get along just great.

 

Are you still on Ven, Cit and Xanax? I'm tapering Lexapro, then Xanax. But I take 3mg Xanax a day.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[Flowers]

Yes Frogie

 

Drugs are still the same as on my signature.

 

It is only very recently that I have started to feel more stable and to be frank I am too scared to do anything yet until I have had more weeks of feeling stable.  I am not yet back to WD normal and I have had a very scary year changing drugs. Part of me wants to start tapering again but I am going with my gut feeling which is to wait a while longer.  Yes, I want to get off these drugs but quality of life and mental well being is important too. 

 

You have done so well with your taper but these past few months have been very difficult for you. Like me you will know when the time is right to continue your taper.

 

Maybe I will buy an extra lottery ticket tomorrow

 

Flowers xxx

[Frogie]

2 minutes ago, Flowers said:

Yes Frogie

 

Drugs are still the same as on my signature.

 

It is only very recently that I have started to feel more stable and to be frank I am too scared to do anything yet until I have had more weeks of feeling stable.  I am not yet back to WD normal and I have had a very scary year changing drugs. Part of me wants to start tapering again but I am going with my gut feeling which is to wait a while longer.  Yes, I want to get off these drugs but quality of life and mental well being is important too. 

 

You have done so well with your taper but these past few months have been very difficult for you. Like me you will know when the time is right to continue your taper.

 

Maybe I will buy an extra lottery ticket tomorrow

 

Flowers xxx

I have no desire to think about tapering right now. I'm stable as I'm going to be right now.

 

I think our lottery is tonight, I'll have my fiancé stop and buy a ticket. You just never know.

 

Thanks...

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[joy2730]

Stable and well is great.

 

Joy

[Flowers]

Update time:

 

After a few wonderful weeks of feeling  reasonably well I have been hit by a wave.  It started a couple of days ago and I am getting to recognise the signs that one is coming my way. Cannot think of anything that has triggered this so just have to accept it as my brain going out of sync again. This has been the longest window I have had since adjusting my meds so hope it is a sign of better things to come and I will get longer windows and shorter waves.

 

Symptoms are nausea, shaking, palpitations, anxiety, low mood, backache,  muscle twitching in legs - not all at once but in varying degrees during the day. Am going to try and get out later for some distraction and exercise - the only thing that seems to help. I am able to read and watch TV though so maybe the waves are reducing in severity too. I really hope so.

 

I have been reading my diary and reflecting on  the good times I had in this last window. It keeps me going  and gives me hope that another window will come along soon.

 

Take care everyone.

 

Love from Flowers xxx

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

are you feeling, any better?  I really hope so and how is your husbands shoulder hopefully also improving.  I replied to your last message to me but not sure if you got it so thought I would check in and see if you are ok. I had a good two days the beginning of this week and even got out for a couple of ‘normal ‘ days   Downhill again now but just having had that brief respite felt so good,  

[Flowers]

9 hours ago, Scorpio said:

Hi flowers

are you feeling, any better?  I really hope so and how is your husbands shoulder hopefully also improving.  I replied to your last message to me but not sure if you got it so thought I would check in and see if you are ok. I had a good two days the beginning of this week and even got out for a couple of ‘normal ‘ days   Downhill again now but just having had that brief respite felt so good,  

Hi Scorpio 

 

Sorry, have not been writing much as have felt a bit tired to be honest. I have done some work this week and have some friends over too so once I am home I am shattered!!

 

Thank you for checking on me - you are a dear when you are not well yourself. I am so glad you had those two good days this week. It keeps me going when I am in a wave just thinking of those times.

 

I am still in this wave and as long as I can rest in the evenings I am able to do things so not too bad. Just exhausting feeling happy one minute, depressed the next  - you know what I mean I am sure!! Everything is a battle but   I start to feel more normal in the evenings  so at least the whole day is not awful. I can enjoy some TV programmes and read.

 

I think I read on your thread you had been cooking? I enjoy cooking too and it does distract me from how I am feeling for a while.  

 

I hope your back is a bit better and that Jude has been around to cheer you up?  How are you coping?

 

My husbands shoulder is getting worse so we are back to the GP next week to see what they can do for him.  We are both still plodding on the best we can!

 

Saw  a lovely sunset photo of Gosport on their facebook site. It was taken tonight. Hope you got a pretty sunset too.

 

Love from Flowers xxx

 

  

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

sorry you’re not over your wave but at least having evenings with mini waves makes life a little more bearable, I tend to be the same and get more relief for a few hours in the evening when going through horrible times. I am sorry your husband is still in pain hopefully the doctors can help him. We had a lovely sunny day here but the wind was really cold and tonight we have a harvest moon - full. So pretty spectacular day all round. 

I am not surprised you are tired in the evenings if you are managing to work as well, superwoman.  Yes I used to adore cooking but since cipralex came into my life creativity went. Although yesterday it felt good if only quiches and bolognaise 

my Back is slowly getting easier although a day with Jude today hasn’t really helped but oh is he worth it. The two days were wonderful just to be like a normal human being what relief and the last two days haven’t been so bad I could still do things on a lower level so I am grateful for them too. Have you got your neighbours cats yet and will they stay wild and outdoors or do you try to tame them. 

Its lovely to see you back on here and to hear from you. Hope things improve each day for both of you. 

Big hugs

 

[Flowers]

3 minutes ago, Scorpio said:

Hi flowers

sorry you’re not over your wave but at least having evenings with mini waves makes life a little more bearable, I tend to be the same and get more relief for a few hours in the evening when going through horrible times. I am sorry your husband is still in pain hopefully the doctors can help him. We had a lovely sunny day here but the wind was really cold and tonight we have a harvest moon - full. So pretty spectacular day all round. 

I am not surprised you are tired in the evenings if you are managing to work as well, superwoman.  Yes I used to adore cooking but since cipralex came into my life creativity went. Although yesterday it felt good if only quiches and bolognaise 

my Back is slowly getting easier although a day with Jude today hasn’t really helped but oh is he worth it. The two days were wonderful just to be like a normal human being what relief and the last two days haven’t been so bad I could still do things on a lower level so I am grateful for them too. Have you got your neighbours cats yet and will they stay wild and outdoors or do you try to tame them. 

Its lovely to see you back on here and to hear from you. Hope things improve each day for both of you. 

Big hugs

 

Scorpio that is such good news that you are feeling a bit better - a good sign that things are going in the right direction and you are healing.

 

I understand completely what you mean about being able to do things on a lower level. I am in a wave but it is manageable and I can still do some things even though I don't feel normal! When you have been so much worse these kind of days are good too.

 

The neighbours cats are not coming to us until their place is sold so could be a while yet. They will be free to do what they want really. If they are wanting to come in they will be very welcome but they are not used to being inside so I  will take my lead from them. They are very affectionate so may fit in quite quickly when we eventually get them.

 

Glad you had Jude today - my 6 year old godson came over from UK with his mum and dad in April when I was feeling very rough. It was very tiring as not used to being around a 6 year old but such fun and he really cheered me up.  I never thought I would be able to get out with them all but managed a day out in Nerja and he loved the train ride up to the caves. He loves trains!

 

Speak soon.

 

Love and hugs

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

another bad start to the day but tried to ignore it as you seem able to do even on the horrible days and went fir a lovely walk to purbrook heath I am not sure if you know it but the cricket ground, heath and lots of gorgeous trees. Horses over a style which Jude loved and a small play park for little ones. He loved the baby swing. The sun was out but the wind was freezing but made me feel so much better although I envy yo the warm sun and beaches to stroll along.  

Its amazing isn’t it that even when we feel at our worst a little person can change our mood for the better every time as you say your nephew managed to get you moving too but oh god yes very exhausting. I am now at 6 breathing a sigh of relief that I am home with only dinner to cook for Tony and I then relax. Graham norton tonight which always makes me laugh and the serial cold feet. 

Hope your bad days are slowly getting better. 

Hugs

 

[Flowers]

Hi Scorpio

 

I am so pleased that you managed to get out even though you were feeling bad.  Walking always helps me and if it is too wet to be outside I go to a large mall here and try to time it so it isn't too busy. I can't do crowds at the moment but the walking even in the mall helps! 

 

I don't know Purbrook Park but it sounds so pretty and very English - I do miss those things especially the colours of the trees changing in the Autumn. So great that there was something for Jude to enjoy there too. 

 

I am not feeling myself by any means but try to get something done everyday if I can. The trick is to get a balance so you don't overdo things as that can make things worse. Can't win can we?!!

 

Yesterday, I had done a bit of light gardening for a client which always makes me feel better. I had come home and managed to eat some lunch as the nausea had gone while I was gardening. I think it must be the fresh air! I came home put something in the slow cooker for dinner and put my feet up to finish a book. Bliss!

 

Then the phone rang and we had totally forgotten we had arranged to meet some friends for dinner in our local Chinese restaurant.  So got showered and out we went. Although I was feeling strange  and felt  sick again and agitated I managed to eat some rice and it was a lovely evening. Having a chat with friends distracts me from how I am feeling.

 

We got back just in time to watch Cold Feet. It doesn't start until 10pm here. I love it and have also enjoyed Dr Foster and Trust me recently.

 

Today my husband took me to a garden centre to get some plants for the  garden/terrace. I couldn't keep many alive in the very hot summer we have had here. Then we went to a mall for a gentle wander around.  

 

My stomach has been really playing up these past few weeks and without going into too much detail I am having what could be serious symptoms that I should really discuss with my Dr. So looks like I will be seeing him on Tuesday.   Groan!!!  I am trying not to worry about it as have enough physical symptoms already thank you!!

 

Hope you have a nice evening. Do you watch Strictly or X Factor? 

 

Love from Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

 

 

[wantrelief]

Hi Flowers,

 

I was reading your thread and noticed I posted here awhile back when we were both trying to stabilize from withdrawal.  It looks like we are back in the same boat, albeit for different reasons.  I am so sorry for all you've gone through.  You sound so strong, even when in a wave going out and doing what you can.  I am finding it difficult to do much at all.  I really admire your courage through your journey.

 

All the best,

Michele

[Flowers]

Hello Michele

 

Thank you for visiting me here and I do remember you from all that time ago!  Like you say we are both still here plodding on. 

 

Thank you for your kind words but some days I do not have any courage at all! I am confined to bed or the sofa and literally can't move like most of us have experienced in WD.

 

The only reason that I push myself to get out when I can is that it does make me feel better mentally and physically. My waves seem to have different strengths.

 

I am so sorry you are where you are  especially as you have tried so hard.  From what I can see on your signature it looks like you take a long time to stabilise after any drug changes like me.  Once these drugs get their teeth into us it is so difficult to get off them.

 

What are your symptoms at the moment?  I am so sorry you are not able to do much and hope for better days for you soon.

 

Love and hugs

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

[wantrelief]

Thank you so much for your kind words, Flowers.  I appreciate what you said about me trying so hard.  This has happened to me now so many times, I must admit  I feel quite hopeless now. I am experiencing a lot of symptoms  - currently the most debilitating is what I would describe as severe depression.    

 

We do seem to be similar in that it takes us quite awhile to stabilize.  I hope I can stabilize this time around.  I worry I have put my poor brain through too many changes over the years.  I know I need to get off of these drugs to heal, but just don't know how to even proceed doing that at this point.  Your continued recovery from your recent experience gives me some hope that maybe I too will at least be able to stabilize and decide from there what to do.

 

Thanks for "listening".  I am rooting for you so much to feel better and move forward with your taper!

[RachelSusan]

Hi Flowers,

You were kind enough to drop by my page, so I thought I would be polite and return the favor.

 

I'm in a wave as well, so we can do it together.  I read your signature and it looks like you have been struggling to beat this little monster just as I have.  It's always a mystery to me why some tapers for me have gone so smoothly and other don't, also sometimes  in the middle of holding I might get hit with some rather serious withdrawal symptoms.  I also see you mentioned your waves have different strengths.  Mine too.  Some are stronger, some weaker, some for 4 or 5 hours a day, some for weeks at a time. Have you found that your waves tend to last the same lenght of time, or is that always different for you as well?

 

Anyway in closing, let me say that my wish for us, as well as others on the site, is a lot of recovery, very quickly.

xo

Rs

 

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

its lovely to here from you and good for you getting out and accomplishing gardening job, plus mall but the best thing is going out fir dinner with friends. You amaze me and are further down the road being able to socialise I am still isolating unfortunately and only see brother and wife as they don’t take no for an answer and my daughter. Phone calls I can take occasionally but friends and family are used to it as I was like this while on the cipralex as well. I did get out with tiny for an hour yesterday just to local shops which are easy but although slept last night with the help of melatonin I couldn’t get up and have slid back to all the awful symptoms again and I’m a crying, nauseous, anxious mess again. All plans on hold as I try not to let the hopelessness take me over again. 12 weeks of w.d I just wonder how much longer for stability.  I know I did well last week but now horrible again. 

I am keeping everything crossed that your stomach issues are something that can be treated fairly easily but I understand the thought of Doctors is scary and sends me in a downward spiral if I have to go. 

I love cold feet, and definitely a strictly girl, and holby, casualty, and I have a weak spot for celebrity get me out of here which should start soon. The serial about the army girl can’t remember the name if it at the moment starts again on Tuesday and love that too. Do you get all our channels over there. 

Hooe your stomach pains ease for you soon

big hugs 

[Littlegrandma]

Hi Flowers 

i just wanted to thank you again for coming to my rescue and save me from possibly making another huge mistake. I was so desperate a few days ago for relief from the anxiety and depression, I may have done something drastic and followed my drs recommendation for a new drug.  It was your words that made me think twice. I appreciate it so much. 

  Sorry to hear you're back in a wave. You seem to keep busy regardless. I admire that. You see the dr this tues? I hope you can get a simple resolution. 

 Hugs lg