trenace: is this serious withdrawal after a year?

[powerback]

Hi Trenace sorry to hear of your set back ,im supposed to be taking a break from SA but I was around today and your post touches my heart .

Its a nightmare that's for sure .DRs are giving out antibiotics way to freely and us in withdrawl are super sensitive on top of that.

do your own research before going to the dentist or DRs next time ,of course we need to be careful and not let a virus or infection go unchecked but there's kinder antibiotics out there .next time ask for a moderator and they can direct  you in the direction of a less evasive antibiotic.

battle down as best you can and you will get over this hump/wave .

Its just a set back ,kudos to your friend ,hold on to that one .

Take care. 

[trenace]

Journal. Absolutely astounded at my change in mood shortly after waking. Negative thoughts still nagging at me but overall energy and optimism definitely increased today substantially. Hateful thoughts and overall bad mood seem to have dropped completely. Got a lot more done in the morning and feel like getting more done in the afternoon. Going to have a productive day and get as much done before the inevitable drop. Brain fog slightly less, intrusives decreased depression and anger lifted and desire to live again on rise. Guessing its a hypomanic state after experiencing this in the past. 

[trenace]

Hi everyone, still in the thick of withdrawal here with almost everyday unpredictable in symptoms and moods/emotions. Wanted to ask if tendon and ligament weakness is a withdrawal symptom? I've possible torn my rota cuff and dislocated my bicep tendon, and now my other should is causing me pain and is weak when I move it? If withdrawal didn't last so long it wouldn't be so bad but how do i tackle these other health issues? I'm probably going to need surgery and don't know what to do? I'm highly sensitive to medication and pain. 

[trenace]

Anyone? 

[Kostas]

Hi, 

Tendon, ligament and muscle pain/weakness, was one of my main wd symptom, coming off 20 mg citalopram. 

 

These were coming and going, and were more severe 4 years after completely coming off the drug! 

 

For 2 months I was desperate, going from doctor to doctor and to pain clinics for relief, without any diagnosis or result. 

 

Finally, suddenly one morning  these pains and weakness gone, and for 2 years now never come back, being OK. 

[trenace]

54 minutes ago, Kostas said:

Hi, 

Tendon, ligament and muscle pain/weakness, was one of my main wd symptom, coming off 20 mg citalopram. 

 

These were coming and going, and were more severe 4 years after completely coming off the drug! 

 

For 2 months I was desperate, going from doctor to doctor and to pain clinics for relief, without any diagnosis or result. 

 

Finally, suddenly one morning  these pains and weakness gone, and for 2 years now never come back, being OK. 

Thank god you responded lol my Dr and memory is so bad I kept coming back to check of I had posted anything. Are u okay now? I think I might need surgery because both shoulders are cracking and causing pain I have appoi tment with mri and specialist. If I need surgery what do I do? Because I react badly to medication and stuff. Again thank you for replying

[Kostas]

Hello, 

Yes I am still OK now! 

However despite my pain ordeal, x ray and CT scans, didn't show anything wrong with my bones, ligaments and tendon structures. 

Same with the orthopedic and rheumatologist examinations! 

So doctors had nothing to suggest me, other than mild exercise and pain relief medication. 

 

However, if your medical exams show any problem, then you have to follow your doctor advice to cure them. 

Maybe my case is different than yours. 

 

Best wishes. 

[trenace]

Hi everyone, I'm using this to keep a record aswell as get some advice hopefully. Im waiting for an upcoming mri and trying to treat my gut dysbiosis and sibo amid all the symptoms I have. Some days aren't too bad, other days are horrendous and I'm never symptom free. Anyway my functional doc has put me on an extremely bland diet of rice meat and potatoes due to my sibo, and prescribed me movicol and vitamin c due to pretty Severe constipation. I've taken the movicol and although it disagrees with my gut it helps me to go at least in fits and starts. I took the Vit C today 1g powder and it has caused agitation and anxiety. What do I do? Will my nervous system get used to it, or do I leave it for now, not been able to do much all day due to the severity of the reaction although it isn't as extreme as it was earlier in the year. Don't really know how I'm supposed to cure my dysbiosis and sibo if I can't ingest any supplements. I really think these gut microbes are a major key in my recovery too. Hope to hear from someone soon. 

[trenace]

Hellooooo, lol any advice anyoneeee? I've not taken the Vit C today because my anxiety and agitation is quit bad and I don't want to add to it but having another reaction. Should I wait till my sensitivity decreases or should I start with a tiny dose and build up? I have no idea how my body works

[trenace]

I'm seriously considering suicide these days. My symptoms changed over the winter to extreme adhd obsessive thoughts and sleeplessness which was still better than the constant mood swings rage and fear. Last month I started feeling some positive emotions and hope and stuff, so I started cutting out bad foods because I was eating a lot of chocolates and junk food. Anyways it shocked my body so bad, that by the fifth day of the diet I had extreme anxiety again, the full body kind where all you can do is rock backwards and forwards like a legit mental patient. My ability to nap has gone again and I wake up terrified immediately I've got bodily sensations that drive me crazy and my moods just shift hourly from completeley hopeless to terrified to agitated to furious and I can't be bothered anymore. I believe that people do recover tbh and think everyone should keep fighting of course but personally I really can't be bothered. Im starting to care less about how my family might be affected too, it used to make me upset before just thinking about it, I do love them don't get me wrong but I just really can't be bothered living like this. It's too hard

[ChessieCat]

It might not be the diet.  Or just the diet.

 

Since early this year we have been experiencing a really unusual worldwide set of circumstances caused by Covid.

 

We have other members here who have experienced unexpected waves and/or worse waves over the last few months.

 

If you are feeling suicidal you need to get local support. 

 

Please see this topic:

 

for-those-who-are-feeling-desperate-or-suicidal

 

 

Edited June 16, 2020 by ChessieCat

[ChessieCat]

I went through periods where I felt suicidal.  I read a book which I found very helpful.

 

What I read that helped me to keep going was:

 

                    "It's just a feeling and feelings change."

 

How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me: One Person's Guide to Suicide Prevention

 

by Susan Rose Blauner

[DataGuy]

Hi trenace,

 

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. You are definitely not alone. Please do not act on these thoughts of suicide. If you can, call one of the numbers in the link provided by Chessie.

 

Thoughts of suicide are often fleeting and we sometimes forget when we are feeling at our worst that it wasn't long ago when we felt better. Your body will heal itself and you'll be happy again, you just need to give it the time and opportunity to do so. Even before you are fully healed, you will start to have moments where you feel much better than you do right now. Please talk to someone about these feelings, whether it is a volunteer at one of these helplines, a family member or a friend. 

 

I hope you feel better soon and I will try to give you some help with the PAWS so that you avoid any pitfalls that may slow your healing. Wishing you the best.

Edited June 16, 2020 by DataGuy

[ChessieCat]

From a really good UK website getselfhelp.co.uk

Suicidal:  Crisis Management Plan

Suicidal:  Safety Plan

Suicidal:  Safety Plan Cards

Suicidal Thoughts:  Coping with

[trenace]

Lmao I'm in my fourth year now and I'm tired. I think I was a dead man the second I started taking those pills tbh, I just didnt know it

[trenace]

On 6/16/2020 at 11:33 AM, DataGuy said:

Hi trenace,

 

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. You are definitely not alone. Please do not act on these thoughts of suicide. If you can, call one of the numbers in the link provided by Chessie.

 

Thoughts of suicide are often fleeting and we sometimes forget when we are feeling at our worst that it wasn't long ago when we felt better. Your body will heal itself and you'll be happy again, you just need to give it the time and opportunity to do so. Even before you are fully healed, you will start to have moments where you feel much better than you do right now. Please talk to someone about these feelings, whether it is a volunteer at one of these helplines, a family member or a friend. 

 

I hope you feel better soon and I will try to give you some help with the PAWS so that you avoid any pitfalls that may slow your healing. Wishing you the best.

I havent done anything stupid but the thoughts are always there. Thank you for your message man. My healings been pitfall after pitfall. Ibsont know how to go about making it easier because everything ive done has made me worse. I tried exercise yesterday and my DR got alot worse and i had a panic attack and threw up then later i had quit sever agitation and an hour long crying spell. I know have digestive issues outside of withdrawals but really don't know what eat or do

[DataGuy]

I'm sorry you're still suffering, trenace. Withdrawal is tough because there are no officially designated experts or much research to tell you what to do in order to get better. Some people try many different things thinking they are helping themselves when they are actually making things worse. Sometimes taking a long time to get better has nothing to do with doing anything wrong, but is more about the severity of the injury. I hope I can help you avoid things that may be harmful, if you want to work with me.

 

Are there any medications or supplements you take regularly or that you took in the past few years? I saw that you were prescribed Movicol and Vitamin C. Has there been anything else since then? Are you eating a special diet? Can you tell me what your days are like, how you tend to spend your time? Please take your time to answer. I know it can be difficult to find the motivation to catalogue things in the depth of withdrawal. 

 

Hope we can get you feeling a bit better soon. 

[trenace]

3 hours ago, DataGuy said:

I'm sorry you're still suffering, trenace. Withdrawal is tough because there are no officially designated experts or much research to tell you what to do in order to get better. Some people try many different things thinking they are helping themselves when they are actually making things worse. Sometimes taking a long time to get better has nothing to do with doing anything wrong, but is more about the severity of the injury. I hope I can help you avoid things that may be harmful, if you want to work with me.

 

Are there any medications or supplements you take regularly or that you took in the past few years? I saw that you were prescribed Movicol and Vitamin C. Has there been anything else since then? Are you eating a special diet? Can you tell me what your days are like, how you tend to spend your time? Please take your time to answer. I know it can be difficult to find the motivation to catalogue things in the depth of withdrawal. 

 

Hope we can get you feeling a bit better soon. 

Omg thank you so much I'll tell u everything.

First year was bad but i was masking my symptoms with cannabis.

Second year my nervous system fried, i felt raw, akathisia massive fear and panic all the symptoms i read about i had it.

Third year (last year) i begun exercise and felt so much better, i was out going and full of energy and enthusiasm. My cortisol mornings stopped and symptoms would come in shorter, less powerful waves. 

Then i took a course of amoxicillin for a sinus infection and my nervous system fried again. All the symptoms came back except for akathisia couldnt exercise anymore or even leave my bedroom spent all of last year in a rage and horribly depressed and agitated.

Then over the winter my symptoms changed again and i felt nowhere near recovered but was better overall. I did react badly to vitamin c though so stopped taking it after one try. Movicol didn't seem to make me worse but helped my constipation. 

This year i begin experiencing periods of calm and other periods of feeling good again, i begin listening to music again and laughing and spending time with my family and really became hopeful of getting better so I followed my doctors advice to tend to my stomach issues. I cut out gluten, sugar and dairy and by day 5 of the diet all my symptoms came back, the agitation breathlessness cortisol morning depression crying spells and more (these all stopped over the winter). To sum up when i felt better over the winter leading up to this year i was eating primarily potatoes rice and meat but I was also eating alot of sugar and junk like pizzas. 

I think my gut contains alot of toxins which may have begun dying and my system just cant handle it because i can sometimes feel my panic and other emotions from the pit of my stomach.

Now i don't really know what to eat andnit scares me but I'm still eating alot of potatoes and meat which i i feel okay with. 

Sorry for such a long post. Btw I'm only taking movicol occasionally now because my anxiety gives me diarrhea most mornings now so i don't need it as much.

[trenace]

Oh and in the past I've taken anabolic steroids for weightlifting when i was young stupid and naive and various other drugs. I keep thinking that my history with these is why i wont get better but it might just be withdrawal making me think that i don't know

[trenace]

I forgot to tell you how i spend my time too lol. On really bad days i stay in bed mostly and watch videos on youtube and try to nap but i usually just wake up worse with panic. I try cold showers too they sometimes help. On okay days I'll manage to play video games and call my friends to catch up on stuff if i can handle spending time with family ill sit with them to talk for a while too. Four days ago i actually felt good enough to go out too but i didnt. My symptoms right now have eased a little. I just feel uneasy and sleepy with DR but thats okay.

[Altostrata]

1 hour ago, trenace said:

I'm still eating alot of potatoes and meat which i i feel okay with. 

 

If you feel okay with this, don't change something that's working.

 

Are you getting at least 1/2 hour of daily gentle exercise, such as walking? You don't have to work out. This helps your nervous system recover.

 

Please put your steroid use in your signature and add dates for when you started and stopped the drugs. Are you taking any other drugs now?

[DataGuy]

Thanks, @trenace. It doesn't seem like there is anything fundamentally wrong with you that would stop you from healing. As you said yourself, you have begun to get better at least a couple times. To me it seems like there are very good reasons you haven't gotten all the way better yet. The first problem I see is the cannabis use in the first year. That seems a likely candidate for impeding recovery. I know some claim cannabis as a health item, but it is also known to be anxiogenic (increases anxiety), can cause depressive and psychotic symptoms, and results in impaired cognitive function that can last awhile. It also comes with its own withdrawal syndrome. All that is to say it seems unlikely to promote brain health. After you got over that you started getting better by the 3^rd year, but then the antibiotic caused a major setback. Antibiotics are known for this and can result in some pretty serious symptoms via induced-neurotoxicity (usually by antagonizing GABA receptors or some similar mechanism). You can see in this article  (table 1) that amoxacillin is associated with neurotoxicity, which is thought to be caused by inhibition of the GABA receptors. Most doctors would likely not be familiar with these adverse effects unless they saw them frequently (toxicologists would probably know, neurologists, maybe EM doctors).

 

I think reactions to supplements like vitamin C can be fairly normal if your nervous system is sensitized from withdrawal. Reactions to food are a bit less common but not unheard of at all. You are totally fine eating meat and potatoes*** for now and you can slowly try to introduce other foods when you feel ready (maybe some other vegetables). Hard to know exactly what you are reacting to, but it could be histamine, which some people - even without the benefit of a psych drug injury – have problems with. Here is a list of some foods that can cause histamine reactions, as well as foods that are generally low in histamine. Of course, this might not be the problem, but either way, the safest thing to do is to slowly introduce one food at a time to make sure you are ok with it. And if you have bad reactions to food you try to introduce, I wouldn't worry too much, you can just try to introduce them again later when your system has healed more. As @Altostrata said, no need to mess with what is working. Just know that eventually you will be able to introduce new foods without a problem.

 

The same thing goes with exercise. You can just start with light walking and then progress to more effortful workouts as you start to feel better. I don't think there is any reason you can't get better. Plenty of people have had reactions to antibiotics in withdrawal and recovered. As for the steroid usage, that shouldn't really affect your recovery. Some people can become hypogonadal if they use large amounts for extended periods of time. But if you were young when you used them, it seems pretty likely you recovered fine. I don't think you necessarily need supplements or anything special to get better. If you were healthy before, you should have no problem getting back to that state consuming only food and water. Just treat yourself well and let your body do what it was designed to do when injured: repair itself.

 

***Completely unrelated footnote: I remember reading a news story about one of the oldest people in the world dying at 115 and people who knew him stated that he ate waffles and sausages for literally every meal lol. They wanted to study his genetics to see if they could find anything special that kept him going for so long. So you can live a long time eating an allegedly "crap" diet!

Edited June 27, 2020 by DataGuy

[trenace]

2 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

If you feel okay with this, don't change something that's working.

 

Are you getting at least 1/2 hour of daily gentle exercise, such as walking? You don't have to work out. This helps your nervous system recover.

 

Please put your steroid use in your signature and add dates for when you started and stopped the drugs. Are you taking any other drugs now?

Im going to make sure i walk tonight and will try to make it apart of my routine. I eat bits of sugar here and there because i ate a lot of it over the winter when i felt better and it sometimes helps my mental symptoms. Stops them i jus ate cake but i think this time its caused anxiety so i don't know. I experimented with steroids alot when i was younger but i can't remember the dates its was from the age of 21 to 25 on and off and i started sertraline at 26 and a half. I'm not taking any drugs now though, i haven't touched them since withdrawals got really bad two years ago.

[trenace]

2 hours ago, DataGuy said:

Thanks, @trenace. It doesn't seem like there is anything fundamentally wrong with you that would stop you from healing. As you said yourself, you have begun to get better at least a couple times. To me it seems like there are very good reasons you haven't gotten all the way better yet. The first problem I see is the cannabis use in the first year. That seems a likely candidate for impeding recovery. I know some claim cannabis as a health item, but it is also known to be anxiogenic (increases anxiety), can cause depressive and psychotic symptoms, and results in impaired cognitive function that can last awhile. It also comes with its own withdrawal syndrome. All that is to say it seems unlikely to promote brain health. After you got over that you started getting better by the 3^rd year, but then the antibiotic caused a major setback. Antibiotics are known for this and can result in some pretty serious symptoms via induced-neurotoxicity (usually by antagonizing GABA receptors or some similar mechanism). You can see in this article  (table 1) that amoxacillin is associated with neurotoxicity, which is thought to be caused by inhibition of the GABA receptors. Most doctors would likely not be familiar with these adverse effects unless they saw them frequently (toxicologists would probably know, neurologists, maybe EM doctors).

 

I think reactions to supplements like vitamin C can be fairly normal if your nervous system is sensitized from withdrawal. Reactions to food are a bit less common but not unheard of at all. You are totally fine eating meat and potatoes*** for now and you can slowly try to introduce other foods when you feel ready (maybe some other vegetables). Hard to know exactly what you are reacting to, but it could be histamine, which some people - even without the benefit of a psych drug injury – have problems with. Here is a list of some foods that can cause histamine reactions, as well as foods that are generally low in histamine. Of course, this might not be the problem, but either way, the safest thing to do is to slowly introduce one food at a time to make sure you are ok with it. And if you have bad reactions to food you try to introduce, I wouldn't worry too much, you can just try to introduce them again later when your system has healed more. As @Altostrata said, no need to mess with what is working. Just know that eventually you will be able to introduce new foods without a problem.

 

The same thing goes with exercise. You can just start with light walking and then progress to more effortful workouts as you start to feel better. I don't think there is any reason you can't get better. Plenty of people have had reactions to antibiotics in withdrawal and recovered. As for the steroid usage, that shouldn't really affect your recovery. Some people can become hypogonadal if they use large amounts for extended periods of time. But if you were young when you used them, it seems pretty likely you recovered fine. I don't think you necessarily need supplements or anything special to get better. If you were healthy before, you should have no problem getting back to that state consuming only food and water. Just treat yourself well and let your body do what it was designed to do when injured: repair itself.

 

***Completely unrelated footnote: I remember reading a news story about one of the oldest people in the world dying at 115 and people who knew him stated that he ate waffles and sausages for literally every meal lol. They wanted to study his genetics to see if they could find anything special that kept him going for so long. So you can live a long time eating an allegedly "crap" diet!

Im really scared to go low histamine because when i cut out sugar and dairy and gluten i became suicidal (still am really) and low histamine limits food even more. My Doctor has diagnosed me with sibo (which i agree with) and candida (I'm not sure) so histamine intolerance seems likely too. I'm gna stick to the plain food like u said and start walking around my block. Another thing is i smoke too. Its a coping mechanism and i try to stop but i can't go without right now. I really think without the Antibiotic I'd be so much better off right now. Thank u so much guys for talking to me about this. I think because I'm so severe this far out is why i lose hope. Im going to keep u posted if that's okay

[trenace]

I just want  to add too, when i cut out all the food and had a bad reaction, for the net few days i ate lots of junk like popcorn because i genuinely felt that it calmed down my body and mind but now i feel all over the place. I think maybe small amounts of sugar and gluten make me feel better but large amounts bring on terrible symptoms. One thing im 100% certain about is that my initial reaction from the elimination diet caused massive panic and fear from the pit of my stomach, like i could literally feel it. Im just trying to navigate this diet thing its so hard when im out of my mind with panic  

[Altostrata]

Getting regular exercise is an even more powerful way to promote healing than changing your diet.

[trenace]

5 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Getting regular exercise is an even more powerful way to promote healing than changing your diet.

I think i overdid it with my exercise the other day when i panicked and threw up. I did squats quite heavy considering i haven't done anything for a year. I'm gna go for walks at night now with a friend and maybe do situps at home. I dislocated my bicep tendon last year so i can't life much on my left arm because it hurts me and im too scared to have an op because i even reacted to MRI dye and i was claustrophobic and crying in the scanner because i kept having toxic naps whilst they were scanning. I'm 100% percent sure that i feel worse when i eat certain foods well i just don't know what right now. Im going to stick to meat with either potatoes or rice for main meals because i know im okay with those. But i can't cut out everything totally because i have terrible gluten and sugar withdrawals and my doc said it causes die off of bad bacteria a which my system cant handle at all right now. Can an elimination diet be a kind of detox? Because I've read here that detoxing during withdrawals is not recommended.

[DataGuy]

Ok. I think it's fine to stick to the diet that works for you right now. Hard to say what the problem is but I don't think the body likes big changes when you are in withdrawal. Best to do things with small, incremental changes. I would not worry about having reactions or setbacks etc. Even if you kept everything the same and were very heavily restrictive, you would probably still have some panic attacks or bad reactions to things. It sounds like your system is just unstable right now. It will start to get better as it did before, and then things will seem much easier. 

 

Your plan sounds good. Walks with a friend would be helpful for both the exercise and the social activity.

 

I don't think there is any set definition of what constitutes a 'detox'. I'm not even really sure what is being detoxified in most cases, so I wouldn't worry too much. Just eat what you are comfortable with. No need to stress about any hypothetical dire implications of your current diet. I don't think there are any. There is plenty of theorizing as to what diet is best, what is unhealthy etc but not much evidence for any of it. 

[trenace]

4 hours ago, DataGuy said:

Ok. I think it's fine to stick to the diet that works for you right now. Hard to say what the problem is but I don't think the body likes big changes when you are in withdrawal. Best to do things with small, incremental changes. I would not worry about having reactions or setbacks etc. Even if you kept everything the same and were very heavily restrictive, you would probably still have some panic attacks or bad reactions to things. It sounds like your system is just unstable right now. It will start to get better as it did before, and then things will seem much easier. 

 

Your plan sounds good. Walks with a friend would be helpful for both the exercise and the social activity.

 

I don't think there is any set definition of what constitutes a 'detox'. I'm not even really sure what is being detoxified in most cases, so I wouldn't worry too much. Just eat what you are comfortable with. No need to stress about any hypothetical dire implications of your current diet. I don't think there are any. There is plenty of theorizing as to what diet is best, what is unhealthy etc but not much evidence for any of it. 

Thank you. I'm just gna have little bits of sugar when i feel. Im constantly fearing symptoms like the suicidal depression and it makes me desperate so then try lots of things and make myself worse. Im just gna stick to the one plan and try and relax. Ive eaten potatoes and eggs earlier, then i had a handful of popcorn and I've just eaten chicken and rice now. My anxiety and racing thoughts from the mornings eased off i think its a window feell kind of at ease. Just worrying about symptoms cropping up. Gna try and relax now and watch videos or something. Going to walk later tonight.

[Altostrata]

Don't go crazy with exercise. Build up to it gradually.

 

We don't believe in putting your body through "detox" here. Listen to it and give it what it needs to feel better. You may be reacting to some foods that are considered very healthy, like fermented foods such as yogurt.

 

Probably best to minimize sugar and NO ALCOHOL at all.

 

Please update your signature with the dates you went on and off drugs.

[trenace]

45 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Don't go crazy with exercise. Build up to it gradually.

 

We don't believe in putting your body through "detox" here. Listen to it and give it what it needs to feel better. You may be reacting to some foods that are considered very healthy, like fermented foods such as yogurt.

 

Probably best to minimize sugar and NO ALCOHOL at all.

 

Please update your signature with the dates you went on and off drugs.

Im not going to overdo it im just going to take walks for now. My friends busy so im going to go myself later on after dark just around where I live i dont like going out during the day i dont know why. I'm going to just eat what makes me feel better for now i just hope these waves calm down they're so terrible even this far out but im trying to stay positive. I'm just going to have little bitsbof sugar here and there and I'm not touching alcohol I'm too scared lol. I'll update too. Thanks for helping me I'll keepnpostimg here to show if i make progress or have improvements.

[trenace]

Last night I slept all the way through from 2.am until 9:30 but i had bad dreams. Its always the same one, but in different ways. I woke with a horrible feeling but it ended about a half hour later. I had a cold shower, because it usually helps and it did for a while. I've still got a really up n down uneasy feeling but I'm just going to distract and see if it passes.

[DataGuy]

You are doing great, trenace. REM rebound is common in withdrawal. Many people report having more vivid dreams and nightmares. These meds can suppress REM sleep while you are taking them, so it seems like the brain tries to catch up on this type of sleep once it is finally free of the drug.

[trenace]

19 hours ago, DataGuy said:

You are doing great, trenace. REM rebound is common in withdrawal. Many people report having more vivid dreams and nightmares. These meds can suppress REM sleep while you are taking them, so it seems like the brain tries to catch up on this type of sleep once it is finally free of the drug.

Hi i hope you're okay too, I get so wrapped up in myself that I forget about others. How are you? Today i woke with anxiety and then the anxiety turned into a weird upbeat manic kinda anxiety and now i just feel numb. Don't really feel like doing anything so im just gna watch videos or something and go for a walk later once ive eaten maybe. Ill take this numb feeling over the depression anxiety and anger for sure. Kinda hope i maybe perk up abit later tho.

[DataGuy]

It is normal to get wrapped up in yourself in withdrawal. As you get better you'll find you become much more thoughtful of other people's situations. I would say any improvement is better. The stages I went through in withdrawal was 1) hoping I wouldn't die  2) hoping I would someday get better  3) frustrated that I wasn't getting better fast enough  4) confident I would get better and was ok with the fact that it would take awhile. (Well not entirely ok, but much more at ease than before).

 

I think you will find that as you see improvements, you will begin to relax a bit. It will likely be a long haul, but once you are firmly on the right track and have a good understanding of what recovery takes (and what to avoid), it will be self-sustaining. It's good that you are keeping this thread updated. That way you can check to see what has worked and what didn't work for you. Very important because it can sometimes be hard to remember how you felt a few weeks ago, what you did in response and how your body reacted to that. 

[trenace]

Just journaling here so i remember. Yesterday i woke with anxiety and palpitations and a horrible depressive suicidal mood and agitation that lasted until evening where it lifted and i felt a surge of pretty strong positive emotion. I dont have a clue what this means, i didn't eat until 5 which probably didnt help at all but the agitation and bad mood were so bad i spent the day in my room. And just before bed i ate a piece of chocolate which definitely had a similar effect to caffiene because I felt sleepy and tired before I ate it.