Patti2057: Still suffering 26 months AD free

[Longroadhome]

Checking in @Patti2057

Hows  things this week? 
 

im still in a wave but as I said think it’s to do with personal things. I’m managing and today I feel  a little better. 
 

Hope you do too. 😊

[Patti2057]

Thanks @Longroadhome  

Im sorry you’re still in a wave. I’m also about the same and,as always, can’t understand why this one symptom persists and doesn’t even get a little better. And then I get scared. Praying hard🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
 

Hope you get relief soon😊

[Longroadhome]

Thank you 😊 

Have you other symptoms and if so are they getting any easier ? 

[Patti2057]

I slept better the last two nights and, maybe, the anxiety is a little better so I guess that’s improvement. But this dizziness makes it hard to go about my day. 

[Longroadhome]

Are those three the only symptoms you have now Patti? 

[Patti2057]

I have some pulling in my legs and burning on the soles of my feet but it’s tolerable. 

[Longroadhome]

So you’re  left with 5 symptoms ? 
did you start WD with lots more or has it been the 5 only ? 

[Patti2057]

I first had terrible involuntary muscle movements that the Neurologist is calling severe Akathisia. That started while I was on the ADs and the reason I discontinued them. That stopped after 5 months, thankfully, and then the dizziness began and has been the primary symptom since. The other symptoms came along probably a year or so into my WD. It’s all very bizarre. 

[Longroadhome]

It’s so strange how we all experience WD so different isn’t it?

 

I have around 20 symptoms and have had more !! But the floaty boat is the one I dislike the most. This wave has brought on intense intrusive thoughts . It’s so weird when the mind can’t switch off and the thoughts feels so real. I just keep having to remind myself it’s WD related and not me. 

 

one day you will start to feel better it’s the waiting game. That’s the one thing that’s the same for everyone . Time. 
well two actually because there’s also patience. 

Time snd patience are the true healers . 
 

ive never had any patience but I’m digging long and hard to keep finding some !!! 😊
 

we have had some very cold weather here over the weekend. Today is a tad milder.

there’s been bad weather in Texas according to our news? 
 

my husband has had his first covid vaccine today and sailed through it. He said it was very well organised. He has no pain round the injection site and feels fine up to now . 
waiting for my call up 😉

 

 

 

[Patti2057]

I know. The mind is so powerful and I experience the same at times, especially my mind trying to convince me that I’ll never feel better or there is something seriously wrong with me. I’m understanding myself more and more during this process and a lot of it is very eye opening. Things I didn’t realize while I was on medication. One positive due to WD. 

 

I am looking forward to getting my vaccination. One less worry😊

 

Yes, it’s crazy weather in Texas and something they are not prepared for. I have numerous friends who live there and it’s difficult, no power, frozen pipes😞We had a cold snap also, but not as severe however, we had about two feet of snow which is now melting very slowly.  
 

Better days ahead🙏🏻💖🙏🏻

[Patti2057]

I don’t know if I’ll ever heal or experience even a little bit of relief from this hell. I suffer from dizziness, anxiety and electric like surges when falling asleep and I have been off ADs for 26 months. Doctors have pretty much thrown me to the curb because they have no idea what to do. I’m not experiencing improvement. I fear permanent damage. Is there anything I can do? 

Edited February 21, 2021 by Gridley

[Gridley]

Welcome to SA, Patti2057.  I'm sorry you're suffering.

 

The symptoms you describe are typical antidepressant withdrawal symptoms.  You didn't mention in your post the rate at which you tapered your two psychiatric drugs.  How fast did you taper them or did you cold turkey back in November, 2018?

 

Our experience here indicates you will heal and that you will emerge on the other side a stronger person.  As to when that "other side" occurs, there is no way to predict the time frame.  Twenty-six months isn't at all unusual for withdrawal.  The damage isn't permanent.  As you've found, doctors have no concept of withdrawal.

 

So that you have a better idea what you're experiencing, here is some information on withdrawal and the healing process.

 

What is withdrawal syndrome.

 

Daily Checklist of Antidepressant Withdrawal Symptoms (PDF) 

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

When we take psychiatric medications, the CNS (central nervous system) responds by making changes over the months and years we take the drug(s). When the medication is discontinued, the CNS has to undo all the changes it made. Rebuilding the neurotransmitter production and reactivating the receptor and transporter cells takes time -- during that rebuilding process symptoms occur.  

 

These explain the healing process really well.

 

Brain Remodelling 

 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

We don't recommend a lot of supplements on SA, as many members report being sensitive to them due to our over-reactive nervous systems, but two supplements that we do recommend are magnesium and omega 3 (fish oil). Many people find these to be calming to the nervous system. 

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker 

 

Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil) 

 

Add in one at a time and at a low dose in case you do experience problems. Get supplements that ae single ingredient (not mixed with other types of supplements).

 

We also recommend non-drug methods to cope with withdrawal.  Take a look at the techniques in the following link and see which you think might be helpful to you.

 

Non-drug techniques to cope

 

The following yoga restorative pose is helpful for anxiety.

 

10 minute Restorative Yoga for Relaxation | Up the wall

 

This is your Introduction topic, where you can complete your drug signature, questions and connect with other members.  We're glad you found your way here.

 

 

 

 

[Patti2057]

Thank you @Gridley for your response of reassurance and advice. I feel so helpless and having a place like this and people like you to reach out to is a true blessing   Unfortunately I did an improper taper of about two weeks, almost as bad as CTing. 

[Patti2057]

@Gridley Could I try reinstating a very small amount of Effexor at this point in time?

[manymoretodays]

Introductions merged, last to first.

@Patti2057

Just one Introduction to each member.  Makes sense.  That way your context is all together.  And we can see what has been offered, and not repeat ourselves.

Thank you.

  

On 12/7/2020 at 7:27 PM, Patti2057 said:

Thank you manymoretodays for checking in with me.  Unfortunately, after a few days on the Fluoxetine I began having bad morning anxiety and increased dizziness. Since the Fluoxetine was the only thing different, I am attributing it to that and, so, discontinued the Fluoxetine. I did that three days ago but am still having issues. It’s so unbelievable that I am still experiencing withdrawal after two years off. My overthinking brain can’t help but worry that something else is going on or that I’ve got some sort of permanent damage. 

 

Please update your signature with the ^ information.

I wouldn't, reinstate with Effexor this far out. 

Still no improvements?  Or windows of anykind?

Oh, Patti2057......I'm hoping you've seen some glimmer of improvement.

 

And best, L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Edited February 22, 2021 by manymoretodays

[Patti2057]

@manymoretodaysThank you. I thought I did that. I guess I don’t know how to post on my Intro. Could you please explain?

[manymoretodays]

 

This is your main Introduction topic.  The one you first started in the Introduction forum.  I did go ahead, and add your new title to it.

There's 3 pages of history here, for you, other members, and staff.

 

And then, just one Introduction topic per each member.  That's the rule.  Makes sense.

 

So when you have questions, around your case, or updates they go right here.  Gridley should still see your @ notification, and now they'll be privy to some of what has been suggested already too, and some of your other updates.

 

Some will bookmark their introductions.  Others just find them quickly when they come on, so they can update, or communicate with others on them.

If you get lost, just type your user name in the search box, in the upper right hand corner.  And you'll find your posts.

 

Go to AccountSettings/signature to update your signature with your previous reinstatement trial.

Edited February 22, 2021 by manymoretodays

[Patti2057]

How do I get to my main into topic page when I want to post a question there? I thought I did that today but apparently not. Sorry I’m not catching on 🤦‍♀️

[Patti2057]

@manymoretodaysThe dizziness is still relentless. And the addition of the anxiety rushes waking me in the very early morning (almost like a panic attack waking me) has me unnerved. This far out and no relief plus new symptoms...I can’t help but freak out and worry which, of course, impacts all of this. 😢Will I experience healing?

[JesusSavemefromWD]

Just wondering do u feel the dizziness even if u close ur eyes ? (I don’t mean sleeping, I mean awake and just close ur eyes standing up or taking a few steps 

[manymoretodays]

You did it Patti2057.  You are posting on your Introduction!  Yay.

 

And yes, I believe you will experience further healing. 

That sounds like a cortisol awakening.

[Patti2057]

@JesusSavemefromWD

Yes and eyes closed makes it worse. 

[Gridley]

12 hours ago, Patti2057 said:

Could I try reinstating a very small amount of Effexor at this point in time?

Reinstating Effexor 15 months after your last dose is risky and could make things worse.  Reinstatement works most predictably if done within 3 months of your last dose.

[manymoretodays]

Hi Patti2057,

If you have gotten to the What is withdrawal syndrome topic

You'll see the indexed posts in the first post in that topic too.

This one on Dysautonomia( autonomic dysfunction)

may help you understand a bit more about what your system is going through right now, on the way to healing.

 

And oh, if there was a quick fix for symptoms, we would tell you.  I took me a little while to hunker into healing, and accept that, at least for me........my healing would take some time.

 

Also of note: Managing the morning cortisol spike

 

And then a reminder of the progress you've noted too, here in your Introduction:

And oh, sorry, I saw some posts by you about the dysautonomia, and some of the testing you've had, and other.  I'll leave the first links here again, anyway......so you have them.

 

Hoping for a good window for you real soon.  We often say when in a Wave, or symptoms feel most unmanageable, that may be when the healing is really happening.  Sounds crazy......but it gave me hope when I was in a bad Wave.

 

And then don't discount the effect of this Covid pandemic either, and just how that might increase your anxiety.  I, for one, am so happy to hear about the vaccines.......as well as hopeful.  I'll be in line for one, when my time comes.  For sure.

 

Some do some non-drug coping practices with therapists or other, finding things that help your system relax.  Is this something you might consider?

 

Congrats on posting on your Introduction topic too!  Make it your little home spot here, decorate it with hope and healing.  Onward and upward!

 

Best, L, P, H, and G,

mmt

[Patti2057]

Thank you @manymoretodays It was very encouraging to read your post first thing this morning. I really embraced the reminder of the bamboo plant/brain analogy. Right now it’s doing so much underground work to show it’s glory in Spring. 
 

I do have a therapist I connect with once a week and this does help. And you are correct-the pandemic has truly made this WD journey much more difficult. 
 

Today is

One more day closer to healing🙏🏻💖

[Longroadhome]

Hi @Patti2057

Checking in how are things with you ? 
 

I have my Covid vaccine next Monday. 

[Patti2057]

So glad you are scheduled for your injection. Still no idea when I’ll be able to get mine.  
 

Im trying some new supplements that target the anxiety which drives a lot of the dizziness I think. Today is only the second day so too soon to tell. I am crossing my fingers. How are you?

[Longroadhome]

That sounds interesting let me know how it goes . Fingers crossed it eased the dizziness. 
 

im still in a wave but managing . Thank you for asking . Have some personal stuff going on that really isn’t helping and I’ve also sold my house and need to look for another. I have been to view one today . It’s only the second day since it’s been on the market and it has 20 viewings booked. All down to stamp duty reductions. No stress there .. 

[Patti2057]

Happy you are able to manage in spite of the other life stressors. I hope you find a home soon. Everything around here sells very quickly making housing inventory low. Will keep you in my prayers ❤️

[Longroadhome]

Hi @Patti2057

hows it going with the new supplements 
Are you feeling any better ? 
 

I’m feeling a little better than a few weeks ago. Busy doing painting at my sons house at the moment. 
 

Had my covid vaccine all went well. Very few side effects. 

[Patti2057]

Hi. Thanks for checking on me. I had two dizzy-less days in a row!!! and still waiting to see how today will progress. I am hopeful that I may finally be on the right path🙏🏻💖

 

Glad the vaccine went well for you. I should be able to get mine next month if there is enough in supply. Wonderful that you are painting and keeping your mind occupied. I am pretty weak from this mess I’ve been in and hope I’ll get to feeling better and be able to start improving my strength. 

[Longroadhome]

That’s great news that you have had days without the dizziness . Long may it continue!!

 

did you try the supplements? 

[Longroadhome]

Hi @Patti2057

hows it going. Any more dizzy less days ?

im continuing with my tapering and doing ok. 
Floaty boat still there but I’m managing.  Some days it’s easier than others. 
 

did you have your vaccine 💉 

[Patti2057]

Hi @Longroadhome  Thanks for checking in. I did get my first COVID vaccination and will get the second at the end of this month. I really have not been doing well. The dizziness is still there, some days less than others. But now I have developed crippling anxiety as well and it has been almost impossible to deal with. So, with much thought and trepidation, I have started on a new  AD 10 days ago. I just could not continue trying to live an unmanageable life due to these symptoms, with some days finding myself not wanting to go on. I can only pray that this will help and straighten out my brain chemistry. This was such a difficult decision and one I never thought I’d make. 
 

I hope you are well and you are slaying the WD beast 💕🙏🏻💖

[Longroadhome]

Hi @Patti2057

how did the covid vaccine go? 
Are you feeling any better on the medication? I do hope you are. 

 

im coping with my symptoms and carrying on tapering. Last few days have been hard but yesterday and today so far have been good.
 

im still in the process of moving house so I may hold for a little while now. 
 

 

 

[Patti2057]

You are amazing. Moving is so stressful in it of itself and you are tapering as well, and doing seemingly well. I’m so happy for you. 
Dose one of the vaccine was fine. Didn’t notice anything; my arm was hardly sore. We are getting dose two today. They say some people get flu like symptoms from the 2nd one so we’ll see how it goes.  How was your experience? I’m just so glad to have this out of the way and able to feel safer. 
I think the new med is helping. I am tolerating it just fine and in the, past week, I am noticing my mood, energy and level of motivation improving. The dizziness has decrease immensely. I still have times when it comes on strong but the duration is of a much shorter time. I feel like I can manage it now whereas before I was unable to do so. I’m still having some strong surges of anxiety but I upped my dose eight days ago. Doc says to give it two more weeks.  I’m also doing counseling because I must learn to manage my anxiety. A pill is not the magic solution. I have a lot of work to do on myself.