AliG Posted November 7, 2015 Share Posted November 7, 2015 MMT. It is ok !! We all started off here , in a bad way ! Gradually we start to come good , and then realize what has happened . I agree. It's horrifying ! Hugs, Ali. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 9, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 9, 2015 I don't know that it's so horrifying anymore.........when one looks at what goes on in the rest of the world and all that.......... I'm not one to be passive anymore but just the knowledge of how many are.........that is horrifying. And stuck in the mud. We do what we can........in the shape that we are in........ and do it with loving kindness and intelligence(human mainly) and as our spirits guide us without fear. I'm not sure that Thailand is on my short list, perhaps my long list. No problem on the lack of virtual postcards. I have a book here, a tome really...........called "The Courage to Heal"..........it might be a good one for you to look at a bit while you nude sunbathe and do some whirling dervish dances or just lie there on your floats thing in the pool. Definitely applicable to childhood sexual abuse. From one of my angels quite some time ago. Oh and I was lucky enough to do some work(on my stuff) some time ago at a RRC. It involved Art therapy.....my first forage into that. I think barely 18 qualifies as a child these days. Day 5 has past with the Z-pack and am a bit better. Still ideating on the paid work........I gave them a start date of Nov. 16th and would like to extend that.........I'm not sure how that will go over. Perhaps something closer to home. I am painstakingly setting limits with the associate.........with as much not tough love as I can.........mother earth love perhaps. The water is helping.......boy oh boy do I hope it storms mightily this winter. And realize just how much he needs a male role model so bad right now.........and I can't be that for him. Sheesh his Dad and Grandpa are mollycoddling to the nth degree. I will cut a few more squares for the quilt.......give him a few, hopefully last rides here and there, cook some nice dinners and just not go there........to the thought/idea of really letting him go completely..........that would be worse than death I imagine. But people do live through it........I have seen it with my own eyes. Sorry so somber. Dobedobedobedah. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
AliG Posted November 10, 2015 Share Posted November 10, 2015 Hi Manymoretodays, Thank you for your support on my thread , and for me . I appreciate it immensely. Love , your spirit !! Hugs , Ali. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 11, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 11, 2015 Oh AliG, thank you too!!! Thank you all really. I will recant on the driving of the associate around as he needs. I will do it.......happy to do it. When I can. Another conference today and I sure wish I had encouraged him to attend along with me some more, as so much good stuff. He did go along for the commute, as his counseling is today, and will stay once again with his grandpa(close by to his appointment) for a night. I need to get all my local referrals up to date and use them when I encounter those who have needs. One new program is "fit to health".......another non profit but going strong for a year now........very impressive. A lot of impressive stuff happening. But as yet.......no one I talk too seems to be interested in serving us........those who have made the choice........and wish we had been given more information and choices at one time........more information as well at the times we now find our selves at(locally and from local pros or peers) and support. I will, however.........keep trying. And feel grateful.......very grateful for SA. It's a tough one. How to break on into the mainstream one day..........of mental health care.........with all we know and all we have suffered.... and suffered still. A liability issue????........I don't know. I'll keep at it. Another interview tomorrow. Another application put in and then 2 more and we'll see......... I regret to inform everyone that at this moment, just this moment, mind you..........I wish to be a homemaker only........... but what I could do with some extra income.....I mean it is still such a struggle some months........... as well as how proud I would be to be working for pay at all........ Come on perfect 16 hour a week job!!!! Or not. LOL. I will go with the flow......of the universe I guess. And try again in the new year if need be. Interrupted sleep last night.......so very tired right now. And need to finish up some other stuff pronto.......first thing in the AM. I think the worst of the pneumonia has past......still a cough and now sneezing again........but much improved. Also snow........beautiful snow! Hugs back. Sorry I haven't had much time........ but for an occasional comment or support and encouragement. Or discussion, further education........ Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
melanie Posted November 11, 2015 Share Posted November 11, 2015 Hey Manymoretodays, Am following your thread as much as time/energy allow... With an electronic dictionary, but I've always loved dictionaries, so it's OK... Only recently realized that "the associate" is your son! Tough love... I think it is about assertiveness, setting limits. Saying to someone you love: I am gonna help you but only if you do something to help yourself. If you do nothing, I'm gonna watch you hit bottom, although my heart will be breaking. Cause when you hit bottom, you may finally wake up and start your recovery process. This is what my addiction therapist recently gave me: tough love. I'm grateful to him, I hope he perseveres in his stance towards me... I admire your daily struggle. Now searching for a job... Even 16 hours a week, that would be great, wouldn't it? A job from home... Am waiting for mine still to arrive, but things are headed in the good direction. In spite of some traumatic experience along the way... "Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.", as Max Ehrmann says, in my beloved "Desiderata". And the financial side of it all... Who said it would be easy? Big hugs to you, Mel 1990-1992 Anafranil. OCD under control, extreme social phobia. Hospitalized for the 1st and 2nd time (out of 3). 1999-2002: Prozac 20 mg. Stopped due to severe anxiety. Increased benzo consumption. 2003-2005: AD free (therapy). Feeling good, started working. Persisted 9 yrs in full-time job. 2005-2007: Ixel (milnacipran). SNRI. 2007-2011: Lexapro 10-15 mg. Fatigue and anxiety. Mania. Insomnia. Acne. Shopoholism. Polydrugging with different meds. 2011-2013: Effexor 37,5-150 mg (mostly 75 mg). SNRI. Fatigue and depression, terrible acne with scars, now gone. April 2013: Wellbutrin 150 mg. Hot flashes, extreme appetite, aggression. May 2013 - May 2014: Prozac - from 10 mg to 0 mg, very harsh taper. Functioning great but EXTREME ANXIETY. From May 2014: tried different ADs to replace Prozac, nothing worked, terrible side effects (Seroxat, Zoloft, Luvox, Brintellix, Doxepin, Trazodone). May 2014 back to benzos (Valium) in hope of improvement, aggravated depression and anxiety. Sept. 2014: Lexapro 2,5 mg, highest dose 5 mg for 1,5 months (Spring 2015). Steady decline, anxiety, fatigue. Diagnosed with OCD, dysthymia, social phobia, anxiety disorder, insomnia, eating disorder (first bulimia, then anorexia). Current meds: Seroquel 6,25 mg for sleep - 5 mg since Nov. 5, 2015. Lexapro 1,25 mg since Aug. 4th 2015. Valium, Ambien prn, tapering. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9984-melanie-should-i-reinstate-lexapro/ Link to comment
freespirit Posted November 12, 2015 Share Posted November 12, 2015 I'm glad you're feeling a bit better physically, that the pneumonia is easing. I think I share your ambivalence regarding work! In one moment, that part-time work seems ideal..only to be followed by another where living my more monastic life seems perfect. Some wish to be a part of the world, and some wish to continue on in the ways that serve oneself best....and wishing there was some better middle path between those. Regardless, I'm finding it useful to engage in the process of considering work. Doing things like writing a resume, gathering references and such can help see oneself in a little different light..and after being in the depths of grief and the throes of WD, it can prove helpful to look at life from a different viewpoint. So, I wish you well with the journey...as well as whatever outcome it brings. Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission. Current Medications: Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats.. My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282 Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself. “After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.” ― Mary Oliver Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 14, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 14, 2015 Decreasing Trileptal night. My final decision on this matter is that I am just going to mix it the same and go by cc./ml.'s rather than mg.'s. So tonight marks 9 cc.'s or approximately 67 mg.'s of these sheet(sorry for the disguised swearing) and I will be off it in 4 or 5 mos. Not too shabby I say. I'll see if I feel much weirder by next Weds. or so.......and go back to 75mg./10cc. if so. Yah......so associate son sleep walked early this morning........I had only gotten 4 hours of sleep by then.......and he stumbled to the upstairs bathroom.........of which I am going to have to start a redo on.........confine him to his quarters in the lower deck........maybe.........I mean how does one train a sleepwalker? Of course I thought he was drunk or drugging.........but not to be. Good for him. Feeling the feelings I think leads to sleepwalking........for him. He did that when he was little too. It was pretty noisy though.......I walked him back downstairs for safety reasons. I mean I could tell he was not awake. Soooooo.........just tired. Pleasant days though and pretty with lingering snow. Yah.......I go over the pros and cons of this job thing and mostly it is pros so I hope I can survive the ski ing part all optimistic and enthusiastic. A try out! Ugh. No pressure or anything.......I mean really......... Lol. Worst thing now will be if I don't get it.........and I can deal with that too...........I'll just confine my weeping to one half hour or something. Pat myself on the back for giving it a decent go. Tonight marks number 9 anyway. The countdown begins! Thanks for the posts. I'll miss you freespirit. Awesome last writing and song. Jewel!!! Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 14, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 14, 2015 November 14th. A Saturday. Nice. No AM(morning) anything today. I don't always wonder why. That's a first. Off to the sweat lodge tomorrow. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 17, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 17, 2015 So.......... I guess when it rains and snows it sometimes pours. Maybe it is just a trial of sorts. In grey. I held off bringing my car in this morning with simplification in mind. The furnace inspection did not go well and further diagnostics first before the big fix. Meanwhile, thankful for the gas fireplaces as the furnace is now off. My car spun out on Sunday.....not ice, maybe a rock or some road construction debris........a full 180 off the road and into the slightly downward sloping dirt and rocks. It's wobbly now.......real wobbly.......... Why I didn't just stop at the beach......although the sweat lodge was very good........I don't know........will bring it on in tomorrow. So much for my Karma........ Would a nice brief vacation have prevented all this? Probably not. I have the money.......I will not go broke.........I have the money..........I will not go broke........... I no longer, however, will have any money for any vacations any time soon. Good thing I live in paradise, eh? Associate maybe got a job today. Not sure if I am in or out with the one I am waiting to hear on........ Not sure about anything. Oh my.........this just in.........he has got 2 more possibles. That's him though..........important and all but my own oxygen mask has slipped, once again..........I know the drill..........keep moving.........do what I have to. Let my eyes make rain..........do a rain dance? I know I don't have to get through all this by myself.........I know it is not the worst that could be......... I know I can still be kind and considerate and not helpless. And listen......I'm just practicing these words above........practicing, practicing............feel like sheet and afraid. Pneumonia is definitely better! That's good Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 18, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 18, 2015 Okay.....better now. It wasn't so bad.......the furnace thing of today. Relieved that there was no CO output nor gas leak. They did, of course, try try try to sell me their further services........even to the point of wanting to check my credit and like do it right now. I cooperated. Sheesh. I am sure I will be hearing from them soon, but of course, will not make any rash heating and cooling system purchases nor decisions. I think they tuned it up?? I'm sure they did. They were nice really and professional. 10 year system warranties??? Shouldn't they be longer. Oh well......and I am proud to announce that my furnace is a one of kind almost........the rest were lemons(same year and model). So it is retro and if not antique then it is pretty cool that I have one. Right? Worked out well enough. I should like them on FB. Why can't I get paid for days like today though? This to the universe. Hard work that I do. Hoping for some average and smooth for a couple of days now. And if only my days could start at........say 5 or 6pm........I might be just fine. So it's a bit of a wave........truly.......I am only a year out and not even done with the Trileptal/Oxy. titration. Anybody out there with positive experiences coming off Trileptal to share? In fact I only heard of one experience so far on this forum. Maybe cold turkey off and then seizures? I never had seizures. I don't want seizures now. This is just so crazy sometimes. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 19, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 19, 2015 Ha.....the site WAS down for a couple today. Relief to know. I thought maybe it had disappeared.........yikes........then I would have site withdrawal to contend with. My car repairs are pricey. Not sure if I will get any insurance reimbursement. The heating and cooling sales people are showing up at my door........same ones......I don't appreciate the pressure. And they are close by........this can wait. I mean I know they want work through the holidays and all but..........we'll see..........I am not made of money...........I might tell them just to check with me in January. I have a guy coming to preview the steam cleaning of the rugs tomorrow.........I guess one could say I am getting things in order here. I don't hostess for Thanksgiving this year......which is nice..........so get to do some clearance action before Christmas clutter..........I think I will go minimal this year on that business. Simple. Doesn't everybody Spring clean and de-clutter in winter?? I don't even mind the no vacation anymore. I can stay in the city on Turkey day........that might be it......the vacation for now. I must do some writing.......shaman stuff and other. None of this has much to do withdrawal but then again it has everything to do with it..........sort of. Busy days......and I hope I can get to a point of vacation mind soon. Way off on my long walks, swims, saunas, and yoga as well...........or bike........I could ride my bike some of these milder days. Studying my new omega 3's.........I might exchange them though.......I haven't broken the seal yet.........they will probably be okay.........just not sure they are from wild fish like my old ones were. Costco has oodles of choices..........maybe I should just go with the Kirkland. We'll see. ..........will call on that job tomorrow........maybe wait until friday...........not sure if I am supposed to call them or just wait...............hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
AliG Posted November 19, 2015 Share Posted November 19, 2015 Hi ManyMoreTodays, How's life in Paradise ? It sounds like you are going ok with the trileptal taper. Can I ask what you were on that for since you said you didn't have seizures? I'm glad you're over the pneumonia. I just wanted to wish you well with the job. I hope you find out soon, but if it doesn't work out , something else will turn up , I'm sure. It's snowing there ? It's hard to fathom , when it's so hot here ! Lots going on with you. I'm glad you're ok after the car spin. Thanks for your thoughts, on my thread. Appreciate it. Love, Ali. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 19, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 19, 2015 The trileptal was the balancer I chose when I agreed to the salts last October. I'm just feeling nervous about it. Nervous about a lot these last couple of days. So......will continue the slow dance off of it. Back a bit to that state of urgency mind........anxiety, fears...........must take a day soon to read some fiction or watch a couple movies......... Yes.....Love, MMT Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 19, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 19, 2015 No go on the job. The universe has spoken. HR said he would call next Monday and I will call him, if he doesn't, after seeing what else they may have that suits for the season. Disappointed? Sure I am....... What will be though......... Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 21, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 21, 2015 I am okay with the decision. Today. I think I hope I conducted that phone conversation with my utmost happy face, still willing........going to find me a job there........flexible, any weather, weathered self. I think I need computer skills............ IDK.........I can clean, serve, smile, listen, tell stories, keep people safe(usually), fix most people up or send them on, ski, create(in my head anyway), and even know a few chords on the guitar.............usually keep my cool until after the chaos of the world..........ummmm........oh, I like to laugh. Back to that comedy. Found a new Yoga place to check out and also had a brisk walk/run today! Oh and I will soon be learning how the Europeans do house parties, to prepare me for what is going to be the frosting on my cake...... my February house party. My esteemed house guest/musician said she doesn't care if she just comes to entertain me and a friend........in exchange for beds and such..............oh my..........made me cryeth...... Paradise is looking good today. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 21, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 21, 2015 Further clarification of why I started Trileptal in October of 2014. That was during my last hosptalization....completely an elective decision on my part. And as happens, for many, when coming off an AD....too quickly AND with a change from tablet to liquid.....I had gone from 5mg.in tablet form (one half of a 10 mg.) to 3 mg. liquid. Also was dealing with grief....big time loss. So...although I was pretty addled (messed up)....somehow I knew enough to suggest trileptal as the lesser of many of the other medication evils that I had tried. Knowing....that for me at that time...even low dose salts could send me sky high. Oh yah...the Dr. wanted me to take much higher doses of the salts....extended release and such. I more or less worked out low doses out of the hospital. I apologize for the run on here...paragraph. Android today. So that is that about that. My understanding and education around psych meds had been about 2 yrs. at that time. I continue to learn and feel fortunate. Very fortunate. Much wholer and real. Not an easy choice by far....but one that should be considered for so many. To health and gratitude! The comedy of anonymity is going to be real long....then shortened......then shared somewhere or put to music. Laughing face here....the dead and serious is no fun.....but it is too. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
AliG Posted November 21, 2015 Share Posted November 21, 2015 MannyMoreTodays, I always have to read your posts a few times , before I understand . New colour today ?? LOL. Just reading your Sig - Psych meds 1988 - 27 or 28 ? . Are you serious ? The number of Meds , you were on ? You have come so far, I can't believe it. Inspiring ! Lots of love , Ali Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 22, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 22, 2015 I know. Sorry that doesn't make much sense at all. My quest for getting free of psychiatric medication came about 2 years prior to actually trying. I don't know what color today is so I went with green. Gray green this post. Is that what you meant? I have a nice homeless man as a guest tonight. He was at the AA mtg. and I just couldn't leave him to the concrete. On Monday hoping I can find him some further aid and shelter. The associate is here too or I wouldn't have done it. Safety reasons and all. I try and do this anonymous thing and just can't sometimes........I mean as far as being someone I am not on line. Between that and AA and all the rest of this I sometimes have to just laugh and take leave.......write about it, etc. That's the comedy of anonymity.........I mean even try and say that 3 times quickly. Did that make sense? Oh Ali.......thanks for posting.........I guess I just had a tough week is all........and a lot of overthinking today......... Love, love, try, try.......kind of a weird day here. Just have to wait for my guests jackets to dry, clean up the dishes, and off to bed I go............ Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 23, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 23, 2015 I had to shorten my guests stay to just one night.......as it became apparent that I was overdoing, trying to right another alleged wrong to another.........oh plus the fact that the front page story in the Sunday newspaper was related to homeless shelters and such and was so bleak that I knew there was no way I could leave him there. So......I listened to the advice available to me. Did the next right thing. And then, of course, felt bad about it. I left him in the sunshine though.......a beautiful couple of hours yesterday........and actually heard some really good ideas being given to him. I hope he listened. My other alleged wrong to another.......well.....sheesh, honest to Pete.........I think she would have sucked me dry completely. Perhaps I'm wrong......I don't know yet.......only that this interpersonal stuff is hard. It sure seemed that she was manipulative though......turning stuff around and around.......due to her own full plate of misery, I'm sure but still.......................... Started a reply to Fresh and then canceled. It went something like this: so what are you eating lately? And maybe it's the increased EPA to DHA change in my omega 3's or diet. I'm eating everything now........I don't think that it all is the best for me. I remind myself too........I am still pretty undateable, unfriendable and all that. And that's okay for now.....for a little longer........maybe forever? It's okay. I have the memories of when people accepted me as I was then and times spent and all that. Ahhhhh this morning, thankfully. Monday. An abbreviated week due to Thanksgiving. The associate is off to work! Talk about a proud Mama bear. Turkey and gratitude week here I come............. Thanks AliG. Don't be swelling my head however........I am. Not so different from any other. Beam me on over Aussie gals!!! Just virtually, of course. See you at the beach later. The one with Flowers. It is so brown around here. If it weren't for the blue sky I don't quite know what I would do. Paint my house purple? Oh and probably not......to travel at Christmas this year.......and see the Mum. I told her I would be on call while my sister is off traveling though.......for that just in case medical emergency.......... Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 25, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 25, 2015 And the facial.....from Fresh. Must try! I don't feel like sour sugar anymore but it is evening now. I am simply trying to figure out why I am wearing turtlenecks again.........as........I gave them up for all but ski ing years ago. The stores are already crowded......people trying to beat the black friday shopping crowds. I wonder what is open in the am of the holiday tomorrow? We be going over the hill and not to grandma's house. I even took measures to maybe cancel but then felt so sour about being the sour grape one.........I shifted. Hope I can make it last! It does affect those around us......even when our mouths and typing fingers are muted. Fears of too much EPA continue(in my fish oil)........... And I see I did pretty good window wise for about 3 mos. until this couple of weeks now. I hope I am back. And so much seems situational......still neuroemos if I can't help but overreact I think. I usually catch it quicker anyway.......do a little back stepping and apologies. Not always......sometimes I HAVE to make a point. Cynical IS funny. Yes, agree. Thank you Alto! Happy Thanksgiving! Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Fresh Posted November 26, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 26, 2015 Happy Thanksgiving MMT ! So good to hear you can eat everything now . . . having loads of omega-3's in coconut oil and seeds and nuts has helped me too. I can eat whatever I want pretty much (this week I polishes off 1litre of mint/choc ice cream in 3 sittings!) , but I don't have much of an appetite , and keep it pretty simple. Lots of protein . . . hard boiled eggs with greek yoghurt are a big favorite of late. And I'm back on the cow after 15 years . . . sticking with grass-fed , no hormones etc. My body seems to be loving it. Himalayan rock salt is a new discovery. Did you know it has 84% sodium , and the other 16% is all trace minerals that we need. Check out Himalayan Salt Sole , pronounced so-lay (a jar of water with enough HRS in it that it can't all dissolve - maximum salt density). I take one teaspoon morning and night when I remember. And I use the sole as the trace minerals in Dr. Axe's Homemade Remineralizing Toothpaste - along with coconut oil , bicarb. of soda , and lemon essential oil. My teeth haven't been this fresh and sparkly for ages! Enjoy the scrub/mask . . . the combination of salt and honey is quite yum. Pop a few drop of olive oil in for a more moisturizing mixture. 1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg 2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months. July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months. Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg. October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive. March 2016 , 21mg Link to comment
AliG Posted November 26, 2015 Share Posted November 26, 2015 ManyMoreTodays, I hope you have a very happy Thanksgiving. We Aussies , don't have that celebration, unfortunately. I think it is a nice idea, and I wish we did ! What are you doing ? You said " over the hill" & not to Grandma's ! LOL ( not sure ) ! Anyway, it would be nice to beam you over and have a catch up . Go to the beach, maybe ? I never painted my house purple, but I did paint my front door , purple ! It's awesome and matches some of my flowers . I should send you a pic. Enjoy your holiday . Hugs, Ali Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 27, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 27, 2015 Happy Thanksgiving MMT ! So good to hear you can eat everything now . . . having loads of omega-3's in coconut oil and seeds and nuts has helped me too. I can eat whatever I want pretty much (this week I polishes off 1litre of mint/choc ice cream in 3 sittings!) , but I don't have much of an appetite , and keep it pretty simple. Lots of protein . . . hard boiled eggs with greek yoghurt are a big favorite of late. And I'm back on the cow after 15 years . . . sticking with grass-fed , no hormones etc. My body seems to be loving it. Himalayan rock salt is a new discovery. Did you know it has 84% sodium , and the other 16% is all trace minerals that we need. Check out Himalayan Salt Sole , pronounced so-lay (a jar of water with enough HRS in it that it can't all dissolve - maximum salt density). I take one teaspoon morning and night when I remember. And I use the sole as the trace minerals in Dr. Axe's Homemade Remineralizing Toothpaste - along with coconut oil , bicarb. of soda , and lemon essential oil. My teeth haven't been this fresh and sparkly for ages! Enjoy the scrub/mask . . . the combination of salt and honey is quite yum. Pop a few drop of olive oil in for a more moisturizing mixture. That's it Fresh.......I'm not sure I can eat everything though. The organic turkey and everything was nice and I was fairly calm briefly. It's not so much my gut as my ability to stay chill and not secretely just want to cave completely and crawl under the covers for a year or so.......... I do get some mild to moderate indigestion and then the usual.......it moves to my upper back and neck causing tension. Cortisol? Stress? This wave is tough. It's not usually day long........it does seem that at some point for a few hours anyway, each day........I can get to relax. Then the next real life.........harder than (I don't know what word to insert here).........occurs. Either in the form of something else having problems or my expectations of the people around me not being met. My new omega 3's are, I realized, twice as strong as the last ones. So I skipped a day and then just took one last night. 647 mg. EPA and 253 mg. of DHA. So.......a whopping 900mg. in just one capsule! None of the easy bruising or fish gas releases(I keep them in the freezer and way back found that the 3,000 mg. was just too much for me, they can at higher doses lead to some blood thinning, I believe)..........and I was shooting for just around 1,000 mg. anyway........for now......... I just wonder if the higher EPA is more activating right now than I need. Which really doesn't make sense as far as what I've read here. It should break down to DHA. Just something I recall I read years ago........... Yes, my coconut oil........yah for coconut oil! The latest is my car, of course! It seems the antifreeze drained near empty on my drive home last night. The red light temperature signal came on after I had pulled over to make a call to the missing outlaw(relations through divorce) on my way home. I kept the car running while conversing and smoke came out as well. I babied it home with hazard lights flashing then proudly stayed cool and collected enough to check the book....... find the problem, and didn't even ask for help when the associate decided to help with it. Well......lucky I had antifreeze.......poured it in only to check again and out it is draining. Whose car overheats when the temperature is below freezing????? Seems I have the luck of Riley lately. Hoping......they are in the shop today.......and will go early with hopes of repair of the leak.......and then onward to my therapy appt. Alternate scenario is.......they are not open or are way booked and busy and they just run me on home carless. Which of course will add to my distress. However, if it is fixed by the end of the day......I shall be grateful.......and can also do just a call in appointment for therapy. She will understand. Things beyond my control. Not to mention my main DVD player went out.......discovered this last week.........and all I wanted was to watch a corny movie or 2(had got a couple from the library last week). So......so much for keeping calm and mellow and enjoying the rest of the holiday. I can watch DVD's on the associate's laptop or down in his area.......it shouldn't be a big deal........but I am........well I am how I am right now..........not at all who I hope to become. I know folks have greater worries and all.......and less in the way of present security........and then I start to feel like a jerk........that I would even react inwardly to stupid stuff like this.............oh, man........I need a reliable vehicle though.........I really do. Looking forward to some pampering of self.........one of these days........surely.........one of these days. Interesting facts on the Himalayan salts......thanks for sharing. I just get so wound on up over things......at times.......real things........that keep threatening my independence and precarious balance. Surely a wave! Go away wave! Breathe out. Find the space between my breath........ ManyMoreTodays, I hope you have a very happy Thanksgiving. We Aussies , don't have that celebration, unfortunately. I think it is a nice idea, and I wish we did ! What are you doing ? You said " over the hill" & not to Grandma's ! LOL ( not sure ) ! Anyway, it would be nice to beam you over and have a catch up . Go to the beach, maybe ? I never painted my house purple, but I did paint my front door , purple ! It's awesome and matches some of my flowers . I should send you a pic. Enjoy your holiday . Hugs, Ali I spent time with the exe's family. Only one youngster.......the littlest of the clan was sick and stayed back East. Thankful for another outsider, my nephews girlfriend came.......well both of them from out of state. I do have difficulties with the blood relatives of my ex.........I guess I can say it here with a chuckle..........very quietly...............and in small letters..........they all be crazy in some way............. I did enjoy it though and stuffed myself and I do Love these people........really I do. Just always wishing, wishing for something else, others to change, etc. It really will come from within me........one of these days...........this inner peace and all that. I couldn't quite control my own thoughts and such from going a bit awry......remembering stuff and all that. I also think my ex looks terribly aged and frail and could not help but feel responsible somehow.........although, I am not, I know this rationally. It's been 8 years since the finality of divorce.........8 years!!! Okay......to the swearing wall now........in hopes it helps. The writing and correspondence did and I salute you guys..........thank you. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 27, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 27, 2015 Car is off with the tow truck to the mechanic(indeed the shop IS open). Fake coffee brewing and off I go......well..........here I sit. Sun up and temperatures rising.......oh boy........I see a hike, walk, run in my near future. Today, so far............ and remembering that my record is 100% for getting through the bad days, the tough days, the unexpected normal stuff that everyone has to deal with.........hoping to get a cry in here momentarily........life just seems difficult at this moment but it does help...........the tears and the release...... Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 29, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 29, 2015 Not a whole lot to do with W/D but perhaps? I mean everything about us is affected for awhile. Tonights episode. My car is in for expensive cooling(antifreeze) system repairs until late Monday. The associate is off staying with an Auntie until Sunday. And so......I decide to face my fears about driving his car with the interlock device on it. You have to blow into the device and then suck back rapidly to start the car.......this due to his DUI. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense as he CAN'T drive at all until Febr. but there you have it. So.........I pulled off the whole thing easy/peesy in the driveway and decided to drive myself out in his car. Pride I guess because I had a ride. On my return trip though........keep in mind it is now dark and below freezing, lightly snowing, and icy...........well the thing beeps for a retest(it does this while one is on the road, on the freeway, in the midst of traffic, etc.)..........and I was so close to home. Oh prior to this it said I failed a test. I don't know how. I even switched to non alcohol.....all natural mouthwash while I have been using his car on occasion. Usually he is with me though. So.........I had to pull over as I wasn't quickly getting the test done right, was also coming up to a hairy curve of sorts........... and then I apparently did too many tests, and then the horn started blaring and it locked me out. That thing is dangerous. Some nice folks pulled over to help and he had the wherewithall to SHUT THE CAR OFF AND REMOVE THE KEY. Which worked. Then I got it......darn interlock right, started the car again, and home I came. Alright......almost calmed down now. Just another day in the life. I don't like that interlock thing at all. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted November 29, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 29, 2015 Hi MMT, Thanks for posting your horror story. Sorry but it did make me laugh out loud literally. Technology is not all it's cracked up to be. And they want to foist driverless cars on us?!? Glad you "survived". CC * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 29, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 29, 2015 No problem with laughing CC. I was laughing myself once I got home.......finally. What that nice couple that stopped to help must have thought of me.......I do not know??!!!!! The guy says to me, "We don't want to leave you out here to freeze......where do you live?......we will give you a ride." And I am like....."NOOoooooooo, I will darn well freeze if it comes to that.......this thing is dangerous!!!!! Further clarifying that it was not ME who got the DUI.......and on and on!" Background accompaniment was the blaring horn.......while I am trying to get the interlock co. on my cell phone.....all I got was recordings! Yes......ranting a bit. A teeny tiny bit of ranting for sure. I was however, quite bundled up, hat on, mittens, many layers of clothing, etc. thereby proving my sanity by my appearance.........I hope. Lol. Or......a convincing case of a homeless gal gets car for the evening! I had just finished off a couple of burgers from McDonald's too......the bag was right there. Nice people here in paradise. I am thankful they stopped. I do not like interlock devices. They should be banned! Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 29, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 29, 2015 Pffft.....always too late to edit. PM-Trilept/Oxcarb at 70mg. I am now using 1/2 tab of 150mg. mixed in water and calculating dose based on final liquid measurement. Thinking about getting a prescription for the liquid form. The week after this next one I have a visit scheduled with both my psychiatrist(short one....no co-pay) and regular doctor(yearly labwork). AM-1/3 of the L-methyl, Vit. C. I tried to cut the frozen Omega 3 capsule in half to no avail today......it was still too liquidy and just made a mess.......so will hold on that until I get some new stuff without so much EPA........may as well hold on my Vitamin E too until I get the new Omegas. Holding on the D3 too. I can do a bit of my Costco happy lite. Will see how it all settles. Take a long snow walk/run/hike later. Eat. Relax. Read. It's Sunday. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 30, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 30, 2015 Oh........man oh man..........? bullox(sorry). I did not expect to roll this low in a matter of hours. Just waiting for the pot to boil. Spicy spaghetti on the menu. May I cancel tomorrow? I just might. The confusion has set in........go with the negativity or pretend? A lot to be confused about. Of course this state has come about from skipping my walk......and just a general overwhelm. The associate. Me and my setting limits again. And bill time. And joyful, joyful Christmas on it's way. And I may not be able to be joyful. I was yesterday.......for awhile. Lord, I am sick of withdrawal. Sick with withdrawal. Feeling sick. Feeling low. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 30, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 30, 2015 Carbs helped. I mean worked. Wiped out and such exhaustion I have not felt for awhile. Such a long winters night. I am going nite nite now. I hope I have some dreams. Happy restorative dreams. "There's always tomorrow.......for dreams to come true........" Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 30, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 30, 2015 Exhausted. I will try to finish cleaning the bathrooms and do some laundry. I can't wait to get my car back home. I have to wait until later this afternoon. Scooped the cat litter. Pretty good considering I feel like a sloth. Betsey Ross cat approved of this action. I think I better reduce her dose of hairball goo. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 30, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 30, 2015 This fog is starting to lift. Don't get me wrong it's a beautiful day. I am just starting to get some energy back. Hope it lasts for a few hours anyway....... Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted November 30, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 30, 2015 Another day without a car of me own. It was actually okay news to get as I am trudging through this day anyway. Baby backward steps. I think I have been hit with the revenge of the pneumonia. Perhaps? Or just the revenge of wavishness. Blueskies. Sunny and pretty. And plenty of hot water. I might rig up my humidifier and steam this snot away........sorry.........achy too. Maybe this is the flu? I don't get shots for it. Never have. I think the ibuprofen is kicking in. Ear buds in......the music helps. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted December 1, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 1, 2015 Toasted coconut jasmine rice. From a box no less. With salmon mixed in. So far.......yummy. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
AliG Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 ManyMoreTodays, Life can be rough, for sure . However, I love your attitude. You always make me laugh . You really would like it in the land of " Aussie ". ( Oz). You must visit , one day. You really haven't seen beaches , until you've been here . We have some of the best in the world. I hope you make it through this " rough patch". I'm going through one too. I haven't slept in three days/ nights. Going a bit " cuckoo". Hugs, Ali Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted December 1, 2015 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 1, 2015 Of course we will make it through this "rough patch". Of course we will! Thank you for the post. I am just at that point of the morning where I can decide what to prioritize and get done today........with simplicity in mind, mind you and high priority on those things that lend comfort. And oh......I must.......visit......so many places yet. My nephew did some college time in Australia and so shall I........some time.......one day, when I am stronger and richer and more able. The beaches........the ocean.........oh.........they'll last won't they? They'll wait for me to get there again. Kind of saddens me just thinking about it today. I can't believe that just a month or so ago it was so much warmer and easier around here. Yet, I know I did the best I could to prepare for the winter, with what I have. And to contribute a bit to the outside world in such a small way. The strength of survivorship.......to that I suppose. Seems such a lonely place sometimes. I do think I will not even believe I have a second car anymore. Interlock PTSD and some anger.........ggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
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