crhawk: severe adverse reactions to only ONE 50 mg Zoloft - three months later

[Djones1984]

I had all the skin burning, etc cr and it went away. Just takes time.

[Colonial]

(>>>>A new symptom arose tonight...my skin feels unbelievably "sensitive"...it is still burning throughout my body underneath, but now my skin itself feels like it is on fire and incredibly sensitive.  Like I can't even be touched. I was incredibly sensitive and noticed that it did not really feel good to be touched.  Now, tonight, I am feeling this extreme sensitivity and burning all over my body,  not only under the surface, but on the surface as well.  Is this another thing others have experienced?....)

 

I had that for about 10 days,and then on and off for about a month.  It's like having the flu but being on fire at the same time.  The doc says it's the nerve endings over stimulated and recommended the xanax, which, at least for me, did help. 

[crhawk]

Thank you Ali.  I am feeling very hopeless today.  I still see no light.

 

That is good to hear DJ and that makes sense Colonial.  I hope mine goes away that quickly.

 

I am doing horribly.  I feel like a zombie or a dead person.  I have no feelings.  I feel like I cannot love. I have no apathy.  This is incredibly upsetting and unsettling to me.  I am not feeling the deep love for my own children.  I know it is there, I know I love them.  I am not FEELING it.  That is not okay.  Please tell me this goes away!!!???  Is this part of the process from healing from an adverse reaction???

 

I feel like my head is on fire, like I'm not connected to my body.  I can't drive. 

 

When will these symptoms start to fade?  I feel like I am getting worse instead of better.

 

Does everyone heal from adverse reactions?

[Colonial]

(...Thank you Ali.  I am feeling very hopeless today.  I still see no light....)

 

Me too. Very hopeless today.   

 

 

(...When will these symptoms start to fade?  I feel like I am getting worse instead of better.  Does everyone heal from adverse reactions?...)

 

When I had the neurological-Nervous system reaction to the Levaquin.  My arms and legs would feel like they were on fire on and off for 3 months. You had the Haldol - Zoloft double punch, that may affect the amount of time to completely go away. That may also be affecting the ability to feel emotion.  

[Ali4]

Crhawk,

 

I've read through your thread and iam so sorry that you are going through this, iam currently in a tough place right now myself and although you feel like it's never going to end, YOU WILL get better, it's just a time thing, we all want to be better RIGHT NOW not months from now, I can understand that feeling, I think we all can, but just need to be positive and patient, I know it's easier said then done at times, do your best, one day at a time and easy does it my friend. Take care Ali.

[Djones1984]

Yes you will heal CR my body and head felt like they where on fire in the beginning and that went away. I also did not drive much for like 4 months but I slowly began to drive again. I know how terrible this is but we heal and your symptoms will begin to fade. I am going through a rough patch right now but for the last 2 years I was working, driving and acutually pretty functional.

[Farout]

I had it after an adverse reaction from three tablets. It goes away. You will be able to rejoice in them again.

 

I really feel for you. I went through all this too. Your world turns upside down and all you can do is claw through it as best you can.

 

You will feel better. I promise.

[Roxyrich]

Hi cr.I've been reading your thread, and I see like me you had an adverse reaction. I'm almost 3 months out , and even though I've had good days ,the waves have been getting worse, and I see you've been through it as well, have you found any relief. Wishing you well, rich.

[crhawk]

Thank you all for the kind words and hope.  Sometimes I need a break for the forum...sometimes it is very helpful to me to hear the words of encouragement and hear about others who are going through similar circumstances.  But sometimes I think it adds to my anxiety because I see people who are years out and still struggling deeply.  It scares me a lot.  I can't imagine not being any better one year from the onset of this hell, let alone two, three or more years. 

 

It is good to hear that others have had adverse reactions and have somewhat recovered.  I'm trying to get through, but it is so hard when I don't know what the next minute, hour, day, week, month, etc. will bring, or what to expect.  I can't make plans.  I have decided to file for short term disability.  I am able to work a couple hours here and there, but that is not enough to pay my bills, and not enough to get my job done.  But that will only be up to six months, so I pray that in 6 months I will be well enough to be back to work.  Otherwise, my life will be even more turned upside down.  We will not be able to afford our home, etc, and I cannot do that to my children, move, etc.  They are going through enough as it is with me.  All I want to do is try and heal and then all of these other stresses on top of things does not help.

 

Rich - I am sorry to say that I am not doing well.  I have been reading your thread as well, we are certainly both suffering.  I am about 4.5 months out on the single Haldol dose, and about 3.5 months out from the single Zoloft dose.  In December, I actually had about a 3 week period where I felt much better.  I thought I was going to be healed actually.  Then in the beginning of January it all came back and has not let up since.  That is very disheartening to me.  I do not understand it.  I have not found anything that makes me better.  I have moments, sometimes hours, that are better than others.  I have not been able to find any reason for the better or worsening, unless it is related to the Xanax.  I do find that worrying about these things does not help.  A positive attitude helps some, but I find that very difficult to maintain.  Loud noises make it worse, certain lighting.  Any substance put into my body, sometimes even food make me worse.  I seem to be getting worse I feel.  I am having symptoms I didn't have before.  I have a pain behind my eyes, somewhat of a pressure.  I notice that if I am tired (because I never actually FEEL tired) that the eye pain worsens greatly, as if my eyes are going to pop out of my head.  Then when I close my eyelids, its as if my eyes aren't actually resting or wanting to sleep.  It is so bizarre and terribly uncomfortable.  And I feel like I have no positive feelings - of love, of hope, of anything.  Just sadness, hopelessness and despair.  Very upsetting.  Hoping this all gets better.  Do you have any of these things?

 

I went to my GP yesterday.  She said she has never heard of anything like this happening ever.  She is running the gamut of blood tests.  Then is sending me to the neurologist.  If we find no answers there, which I know that we won't, then she is going to refer me to Mayo.  I am quite certain that there is nothing anyone will be able to do for me, but I guess maybe Mayo might at least have some answers, or will have heard of something like this before.  But it's going to cost my family a fortune, something we do not have the money for right now.

 

I'm just at a loss...

 

How are you getting along?  Do you have any good days?  Or better moments?

[Roxyrich]

I think we're two of a kind.if we go back to the doctor, he will only be able to offer advice or drugs.this is some fight.and yes my symptoms seem worse than in the beginning, how can that be. Praying for both of us.

[Skyler]

cr... check this thread to see if there is a doctor listed who is close enough to you.  I would think there may be someone who is the same distance as the Mayo Clinic or closer.  Several members on the forum have gone to the Mayo Clinic for help, but none have said they benefited. Unfortunately, the Mayo Clinic seems to be no more aware of withdrawal issues than your local GP.  But this thread is a compendium of doctors members have seen who have some understanding of withdrawal. 

[Farout]

The forum is invaluable but in the early days you need hope more than you to satisfy your quest for answers (which can become a bit of a vicious cycle). Try to limit your forum use to your thread for sound advice from the mods and to read recovery stories and the later posts in threads with sunshine. If you can, stay off Dr Google too.

 

It's a real leap of faith but try to trust that it is the adverse reaction/WD and focus on learning the skills to ease your recovery.

[Colonial]

(.... Any substance put into my body, sometimes even food make me worse...)

 

Yes, eating makes me worse too if I don't limit the amount of carbs-sugar at one time.  Cut back on large meals of pasta or cereals. And cut out sodas or energy drinks.  If I drank a glass of orange juice within 40 minutes I would have a petit mal seizure.  You need smaller meals, maybe 5 of them.

 

The doctor tried to send me to the neurologist to, but after reading the forums I realized for me, there really wasn't any point, since it was most likely withdrawal related, and within time the neurological related symptoms died down, as long as I cut back on the caffeine and sugars.  And since they only come back when I make another dose drop, the neurologist wouldn't be of much help to me.  They are neurological symptoms for sure but I just have to wait them out since they are a result of the imbalance in my brain from the dosage drop.

[Djones1984]

Cr, If I had to do it over I would skip all the doctor and neurologist visits that I wasted thousands of dollars on. no one except for the neurologist finally agreed with me that is was withdrawl and an adverse reaction. I have gained more advice from people on the Internet and one psyc nurse I knew that's seen this kind of thing than any so called psychiatric doctor. That said I am going to go see a doctor next month that I have heard understands withdrawl just to see what he says.

[Colonial]

Good luck DJ!  I hope He/She has some ideas.  I know a lot of people who go through this don't end up in the forums.  Maybe they will see other patterns to help you through!

[Hopefull]

From my own experience, chasing doctors is a waste of money.

When they f you up, they have no clue how to put you back together.

Time will heal you and nothing else.

I am not being negative, but it is a fact.

Doctors can offer you more pills and that is far as it goes.

I have spent so much money over the 2 years, trying alternative therapy, supplements etc.

Time is our healer and at the beginning it is hard to accept.

When you are feeling so desperate and hopeless you are willing to try anything.

Majority of us have felt the despair and helplessness that you are experiencing.

It does clear and it does go away.

Be gentle to your self, do what you can.

Time is your healer and a sympathetic ear.

Find a therapist that you can talk to on regular basis.

This whole process is about learning to be patient. Something that is not natural to me.

I am still learning to be patient.

This will pass.

You will heal. You will feel the love for your family. You will have your life back.

Best wishes, Hopefull.

[Colonial]

I agree 100% with hopeful.  And I would add that the HARDEST part of the process for me, was accepting that there isn't much anyone can do. We have been so spoiled in our society that always runs straight to a doctor that we have no patience or coping skills for pain.  We don't know "how to suffer" productively and,unfortunately, without making it worse ourselves.  Unfortunately, we are being forced to learn it late, and in a very severe trial, instead of learning it in minor things like headaches, etc.  We have been so lucky to live in a society where up to now, there has been a "quick fix" for everything.  And now that there isn't and the problem is severe, we are almost unable to cope.

 

Once you can accept that only time is going to help, you will be able to relax more, and stop "blaming" yourself for not "finding" that one thing that will make you better.  And that will go along way to your healing.  The peace and calm that comes with some form of acceptance will help stop adding to the stress that can either prolong your healing our make the symptoms worse while your having them.

[Hopefull]

I agree with you Colonial.

Time is our healer and that is it.

We just have to accept that.

Stay positive.

[crhawk]

Hi everybody - thank you all so much for your thoughtful replies. I wanted to check in since its been a while. I had what I guess I'd consider a window, and was trying to stay positive and just enjoy it. I purposely tried staying off the site for a few days to not focus on my symptoms

 

I agree wholeheartedly with everything you all have said.

 

The Mayo Clinic is probably not going to happen. As you said, I'm sure there is no "cure", I guess I was just open to it, hoping someone there would at least understand... and have some knowledge of it. But I'll most likely save us the money. We have a wonderful university closer and if anything, I may try that.

 

Hopeful and colonial, you are SO right. And I have found that I have begun the process of acceptance. It's incredibly hard. Bringing me to tears now as I type it, but it does help to some extent. Also trying not to focus and think about the symptoms.

 

I need to keep a better diary. I'm really bad at that. I haven't been doing it and I know it would help.

 

I had a period since my last post where I felt improvement. Early last week I had hours during the days where I felt better. Then, starting Thursday afternoon (after acupuncture), I had about 48 hours of feeling quite good. Like I'd say about 75%, with almost no anxiety, no fog, good sleep, and decent feeling in the morning. It was a miracle.

 

My husband did not sleep much Friday night and was incredibly crabby and mean on Saturday. I was doing so well that we actually took our kids on a day trip! Not only did I drive, but I went into a MALL! We ate there and the kids played. I was very concerned about this due to the high activity and noise but I seemed to be OK.

 

But on the way home my husband was being such an a** that I lost it and we got into a big argument. When we got home I just went to bed in a complete depression. I could tell I was going downhill again.

 

Some anxiety and depression Sunday, not terrible, but could tell it was coming on again. Took it easy.

 

I also was not eating the best. I had been avoiding sugar and high carbs, but the last few days I hadn't been to the store and pickings were slim, so my diet was worse. So, I don't know if the wave is caused by the argument, the food, the activity of the outing, the acupuncture wearing off, the Xanax issue, a combo, or none of the above and I'm just in another wave...

 

I was so hopeful to start tapering my Xanax, was about ready to ask Skyler if I could start. I am wondering if it's doing me more harm than good right now. Anyway, I will have to post in the benzo forum about that tomorrow.

 

I've had more trouble falling asleep this week, and last night was terrible. Brought back old memories. Late to sleep, then Jolting awake, light sleep and bad dreams all night.

 

Oh, and I might add...I went into work for two hours on Tuesday. I found myself having anxiety in the pit of my stomach on the way in, and it worsened while working. I think it was too much for me. All of these things have had an effect I think. Side note, I did apply for short term disability and am currently not working. I will hopefully only be doing a few things from home when able.

 

Today was terrible. In bed all day, bad fogginess, anxiety, internal vibrating/trembling is worse than ever. Feeling of unrest, unease, out of it. Had to cancel therapy as I was completely unable to drive.

 

Have you all experienced the internal vibrating/shaking/trembling? It's maddening.

 

I have acupuncture again tomorrow. My last two experiences have been very positive and helpful. Hoping tomorrow will be the same.

 

I also see a psychotherapist next week who does natural healing, relaxation, hypnosis. I'm hoping to find help there as well.

 

Hope you all are well and finding yourselves in a beautiful window.

 

I hope to find one again soon. It was so wonderful, but makes it even more difficult to have it go away and now back in this nightmare.

 

If it wasn't for my amazingly wonderful and supportive family, and all of you wonderful people, I don't think I'd be surviving this so far.

[nz11]

I dont think the Mayo clinic have anything helpful to say

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/basics/treatment/con-20032977

 

As you can see they appear to have no problem with drugs.

 

They appear happy to promote a 'brain chemical' misinformation.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/basics/causes/con-20032977

[Colonial]

While your still having WD tampering the xanax is may NOT a good idea... I just tried to stop in and it gave me a delayed reaction and it was awful.

 

The problem is you only just had a decent window but you see how short they can last.  Constantly shifting your med levels just confuses your brain and takes it longer to heal.

 

You have only been on this dose of xanax for about 2 weeks?  I know with xanax its important to keep it steady in the blood stream or your withdrawal can get worse.

 

Sorry about the difficulty with your husband.  Unfortunately, we can't control others.  While it's true any stress can destabilize our symptoms, remember the art of "acceptance" and try not to "blame" Him or others for the wave.  Again, this is where the fine line of recognizing patterns and doing your best to avoid things that negatively impact us can easily slip into trying to " manage" people and events out of our control, and we fall back into try to "fix" everything around us.  We lose out peace and the gift of acceptance.  It can be so subconscious sometimes.

[KT38]

I have the internal vibrating/shaking/trembling.  It is horrible!! It is like your nervous system is completely out of whack and your brain and body are misfiring.  When I am sitting I feel it all over and I just want to scream.  I can't nap because of it.  And if I do catch a few min., I wake with worse vibrations. 

[crhawk]

I have the internal vibrating/shaking/trembling.  It is horrible!! It is like your nervous system is completely out of whack and your brain and body are misfiring.  When I am sitting I feel it all over and I just want to scream.  I can't nap because of it.  And if I do catch a few min., I wake with worse vibrations. 

 KT, I am exactly the same way.  It is much worse when waking.  And I can have it feeling better, then take literally a 5 minute nap, and wake up with it terrible. 

 

It has never lasted this long for me though.  Seems to be getting worse than before.  Has yours gotten any better?  Or is it on and off?  Constant?

 

I rarely am able to nap though...I'm just wired mentally and the trembling doesn't help either.  Sometimes I think I fall asleep from sheer exhaustion or maybe the Xanax, but always wake worse than I was before.  Such a freaking nightmare.  When will this hell end...

[crhawk]

While your still having WD tampering the xanax is may NOT a good idea... I just tried to stop in and it gave me a delayed reaction and it was awful.

 

The problem is you only just had a decent window but you see how short they can last.  Constantly shifting your med levels just confuses your brain and takes it longer to heal.

 

You have only been on this dose of xanax for about 2 weeks?  I know with xanax its important to keep it steady in the blood stream or your withdrawal can get worse.

 

Sorry about the difficulty with your husband.  Unfortunately, we can't control others.  While it's true any stress can destabilize our symptoms, remember the art of "acceptance" and try not to "blame" Him or others for the wave.  Again, this is where the fine line of recognizing patterns and doing your best to avoid things that negatively impact us can easily slip into trying to " manage" people and events out of our control, and we fall back into try to "fix" everything around us.  We lose out peace and the gift of acceptance.  It can be so subconscious sometimes.

Hi Colonial - thanks for sharing your advice about the Xanax...I'm just worried it might be actually working against me at this point.  Sometimes it seems to help a little, sometimes I wonder if it is making things worse or adding new symptoms. 

 

Yes, have been on the current dose of Xanax since 2/19...about 2 weeks.  Per Skyler's advice, I have been taking 6 even doses, evenly spread throughout the day and night. 

 

I'm trying not to blame my husband, although I think sometimes he forgets how fragile I am.  He is under a lot of stress because of this too, and I am trying to be patient with him, as he is with me.  Overall he has been very helpful through this.  Just gets real "crabby" sometimes. 

 

More than anything, I was just talking through and trying to find out things that may have contributed to my downfall...there were many others at play as well. 

 

Hope you are having a good day, Colonial.  If so, have one for me!  I am having an absolutely dreadful day so far.  Hard to see any progress.

[Colonial]

(...I'm trying not to blame my husband, although I think sometimes he forgets how fragile I am.  He is under a lot of stress because of this too, and I am trying to be patient with him, as he is with me.  Overall he has been very helpful through this.  Just gets real "crabby" sometimes....)

 

 

As your husband, He feels "responsible" to fix it, and since he can't, He feels "guilty" to some extent too.     

[Skyler]

I was so hopeful to start tapering my Xanax, was about ready to ask Skyler if I could start. I am wondering if it's doing me more harm than good right now. Anyway, I will have to post in the benzo forum about that tomorrow.

 

Asked and answered a few days back, but you did not seem to retain the response...

 

OK Skyler - I am ok with that.  Whatever you think is best for me...at which point do you think (or will I know) when to begin tapering? And at that point, I will have no choice but to make the liquid, right?

 

You can begin tapering when you feel better... + a few weeks for good measure. You will either have to make a liquid, or do a cross taper to diazepam.  I'd suggest checking out the liquid taper first, as it's a case of better the devil you know.

 

Check back in in a few to give an update, K?  Hope you start to feel better, but don't be surprised if it takes a couple of weeks to settle down.

 

 

cr... you need to take a hard look at the speed you keep wanting to taper.. it will keep you CNS in an uproar, and you badly need to tone it down.  More symptoms mean the effects of the drug is more active.

[crhawk]

 

I was so hopeful to start tapering my Xanax, was about ready to ask Skyler if I could start. I am wondering if it's doing me more harm than good right now. Anyway, I will have to post in the benzo forum about that tomorrow.

 

Asked and answered a few days back, but you did not seem to retain the response...

 

OK Skyler - I am ok with that.  Whatever you think is best for me...at which point do you think (or will I know) when to begin tapering? And at that point, I will have no choice but to make the liquid, right?

 

You can begin tapering when you feel better... + a few weeks for good measure. You will either have to make a liquid, or do a cross taper to diazepam.  I'd suggest checking out the liquid taper first, as it's a case of better the devil you know.

 

Check back in in a few to give an update, K?  Hope you start to feel better, but don't be surprised if it takes a couple of weeks to settle down.

 

 

cr... you need to take a hard look at the speed you keep wanting to taper.. it will keep you CNS in an uproar, and you badly need to tone it down.  More symptoms mean the effects of the drug is more active.

 

Hi Skyler - no, I fully retained your response.  I had one+ good week, and had hoped this week would bring the same, and even the next...therefore hoping to begin my taper somewhat soon.  I thought that my better week would continue on.  I was very disappointed that it did not.

 

I have also remembered Alto saying at one point that the Xanax may have gone paradoxical.  That has remained a concern of mine.  And I don't know how to tell if it is doing me more harm than good.  Sometimes it seems as though it helps.  Sometimes it seems as though it is causing other issues.  It's so hard to know though if it is still the adverse reaction, or related to the Xanax.  I guess I was wondering that if the drug is paradoxical, does that mean that I should try to start tapering and get off of it?  I'm not even sure that is the case...just has been on my mind.

 

Yes, you are right that I am anxious to get off the Xanax.  I know that the longer I am on it, the more dependent my body is becoming, and will continue to become.  I have read a lot about a 4 month mark...I hope to not reach that point.  It also means I will need a longer taper.  I was hoping to only take this drug for a short amount of time, never thought I'd still be having such effects this far out and still taking it. 

 

When you say "more symptoms mean the drug is more active", do you mean the Xanax (and not the adverse drug reactions)?  And what do you mean by that? 

 

So what if I never feel stabilized for an extended amount of time?  I can't be on this drug forever....

 

Do you think I will stabilize on it soon?  I realize there is no way to know for sure, just wondering about your thoughts.

[Colonial]

I'm so sorry you're in this dilemma.  I don't know about xanax going paradoxical, or what that means, but if you just had a decent window for a whole week, I don't think the problem is the xanax.  If it was the xanax, you would be having problems every time you take it.  And to be honest, you took the xanax for 5 years PRN, I don't think that's your problem.

 

As for worrying about being addicted to it, that's the last thing you can be worrying about at this point is the xanax taper.  I don't mean to sound harsh,but if you were willing to go on Wellbutrin, Paxil and then just zoloft again in October, your concern doesn't seem well founded.  If you didn't have the reaction to the zoloft, you'd still be taking it right now and you wouldn't be worrying about how long you would be on it, right? I mean, you wouldn't be sitting there saying to yourself:  "Oh man, I've been on this zoloft for 4 months now, I can't be on this forever."

 

 It seems the xanax is the only thing at this point that's actually supporting your ability to function.

 

 I realize that it's not until you have a bad reaction that you realize how bad these drugs can be, but it's not realistic now that all of a sudden you're having a bad reaction to all of a sudden be overly panicked about being on the very psych meds that up till now you had no issues taking. 

 

It's hard to say how long this has been coming, but your brain has been hammered with the accumulated changes from the wellbutrin, neurontin, buspar, paxil, haldol and now zoloft.  The fact that you took some of them years ago is not necessarily irrelevant.  

 

 So when you say:  "So what if I never feel stabilized for an extended amount of time?  I can't be on this drug forever..."  Your putting both yourself in an UNFAIR position, and Skyler too.  No one can answer how long it will take.  But if after the hell you've been through, with both the haldol and the zoloft, all you need to do to gain some sort of health is to NOT rush the xanax taper, I can't think why you would want to jeopardize the fact that you're just starting to heal.

 

WISHING YOU ANOTHER GREAT WEEK SOON!    

[crhawk]

I'm so sorry you're in this dilemma.  I don't know about xanax going paradoxical, or what that means, but if you just had a decent window for a whole week, I don't think the problem is the xanax.  If it was the xanax, you would be having problems every time you take it.  And to be honest, you took the xanax for 5 years PRN, I don't think that's your problem.

 

As for worrying about being addicted to it, that's the last thing you can be worrying about at this point is the xanax taper.  I don't mean to sound harsh,but if you were willing to go on Wellbutrin, Paxil and then just zoloft again in October, your concern doesn't seem well founded.  If you didn't have the reaction to the zoloft, you'd still be taking it right now and you wouldn't be worrying about how long you would be on it, right? I mean, you wouldn't be sitting there saying to yourself:  "Oh man, I've been on this zoloft for 4 months now, I can't be on this forever."

 

 It seems the xanax is the only thing at this point that's actually supporting your ability to function.

 

 I realize that it's not until you have a bad reaction that you realize how bad these drugs can be, but it's not realistic now that all of a sudden you're having a bad reaction to all of a sudden be overly panicked about being on the very psych meds that up till now you had no issues taking. 

 

It's hard to say how long this has been coming, but your brain has been hammered with the accumulated changes from the wellbutrin, neurontin, buspar, paxil, haldol and now zoloft.  The fact that you took some of them years ago is not necessarily irrelevant.  

 

 So when you say:  "So what if I never feel stabilized for an extended amount of time?  I can't be on this drug forever..."  Your putting both yourself in an UNFAIR position, and Skyler too.  No one can answer how long it will take.  But if after the hell you've been through, with both the haldol and the zoloft, all you need to do to gain some sort of health is to NOT rush the xanax taper, I can't think why you would want to jeopardize the fact that you're just starting to heal.

 

WISHING YOU ANOTHER GREAT WEEK SOON!    

 

Colonial, Paradoxical basically means that it is creating the symptoms that it is meant to treat.  Alto mentioned earlier in the thread that might be going on with me.  If that were the case, I would assume it we be smart to get off the med.

 

As far as bringing up my "willingness" to taking Wellbutrin, Buspar, Paxil and Neurontin....there was no willingness involved.  It was over 20 years ago and I was a young teenager.  I was told I had depression and anxiety and told to take the pills.  These "mental illnesses" ran in my family, as did family members being given psychotropics to treat them.  No one knew any better.  Certainly not a young teen like myself.

 

I then went almost 20 years before taking another med of that kind.  Xanax was prescribed to me as needed, was taken very rarely, at most twice a month, sometimes months in between and in fact, one year off of it during 2014-2015 before and while pregnant.  And you're right, I had no issues whatsoever when I took it as needed.  It was a lifesaver at times.

 

I didn't even know what Haldol was.  I was given it in the ER for PAIN....believe it or not.  I did not even know what kind of medication it was.  It caused such severe reactions (I had a dystonic reaction) that it contributed greatly at making my anxiety worse.  I was then given Zoloft to treat that ("since Xanax can be addicting, and this will control it more long term").  I actually waited a week before trying the Zoloft, because I actually try to be as much of a "naturalist" as possible.  I do not like meds.  However, it got to the point that my anxiety was affecting my family, so I tried to take it.  As you mentioned, had i had ANY IDEA WHATSOEVER of the potential side effects/withdrawls/adverse reaction - even  remote possibility of that - I would have NEVER EVER taken it.

 

Would I still be on the Zoloft if I never had side effects or an adverse reaction?  Very possibly.  I would know no better, just as most of the population doesn't either.  Just as most from this site also knew no better, and hence are here in a similar boat as me.

 

The thing is, now that I do know about withdrawals, etc, of course I do not want to be on the Xanax for any longer than necessary.  I would think that would be understandable.

 

I don't want to jeopardize anything at all, and that is why I am here instead of on yet another drug.  Just like the rest of us, just trying to get by...one moment, hour, day, week at a time. 

 

This site has been invaluable for me, as I know it has been for all of us.

 

Thanks for your advice, as I know it is well intended.  I hope you are right, that this is all part of my healing.  It is hard to believe in the difficult times.

[Skyler]

If you have withdrawal symptoms from Xanax.. you are much more likely to have issues with going paradoxical.  Do not try to come off sooner to avoid going 'paradoxical'... there would be a much greater likelihood of triggering that response.

 

You are addicted now..   you will not become more addicted by taking your time.

 

Your CNS is very sensitive to these drugs.  Please listen to your body..  Do not taper until all or most of your symptoms have resolved.  If I were in your position.. knowing what I do now, I'd plan on holding for 6 months, then starting to taper at 5% a month.  If you are okay with that pace for 2 months, you could then try going to 10% a month.

 

As long as you are having withdrawal symptoms, your body is acting as it still has the drug.  So it's possible to actually get the drug out of your system sooner, but have your body reacting to it longer.. so, your body ends up responding to the drug longer than if you came off gradually and preserved your quality of life.

 

TuRtLeS RuLe!

 

PS.. if you have a 'window'.. a sustained period of time that lasts, say 2 months, you could think about tapering.. but if you think in terms of say, 6 months, you might do better by removing a constant temptation.

 

PPS  You are also less likely to go 'paradoxical' with the very small frequent doses you are taking.  I think you are trying to assuage your anxiety by taking an action... but you will feel better at this point if you just HOLD, take no action.  Holding is the hardest part of tapering.

[Colonial]

(....Would I still be on the Zoloft if I never had side effects or an adverse reaction?  Very possibly.  I would know no better, just as most of the population doesn't either.  Just as most from this site also knew no better, and hence are here in a similar boat as me....)

 

Which is exactly why you can "rush" off what is helping now.

 

That's what makes this whole thing so sad,  as I said, it's not until we have the problems that we know how bad it can be.  But the knee jerk reaction tends to be to try to rush off everything as soon as possible.  That in turn, brings about what is known as "bringing what one fears down upon ones own head".  You accidentally bring on, by tapering too fast, what you were trying to avoid.

 

And to some extent, once we are "disabled" by these reactions, it may be a considerable amount of time before you can get off your supporting meds.  Please just don't panic and accidentally make things worse for yourself.

 

HUGS!   

 

ETA:  Because your CNS is already destabilized, the normal xanax rules will not apply to you.  You would have trouble getting off it regardless. You're not going to have a "harder" time later than you would now.  In fact, by waiting, you will probably have an easier time AFTER your CNS stabilizes.

[crhawk]

Ironically, I tried magnesium (my second attempt) two nights before the twitches started. I've cut out sugar (and most carbs) almost completely.

 

So... this is of topic from my original symptom post... but I'm having other weird nonsense now too...

 

The left leg was twitching frequently for over a day. Mostly on one spot to the right of my knee. Before bed, my leg felt like it was burning from the inside.

 

Next day the whole leg was sore like I had a hard workout the day before (haven't done anything strenuous or injured it). Just a couple twitches.

 

Now today, it felt much better most of the day. But a few hours back, it started feeling like something was sharply poking my ankle, but nothing was. I started getting a pins and needles feeling shortly after throughout my whole leg. Hip to toes. It's felt like that over an hour now. Almost like it's asleep. Also feeling it slightly in my left hand.

 

(post moved from another thread by Fresh)

[crhawk]

OK guys....I have had a really weird symptom develop in the last few days. Please let me know if you've heard of this.

 

My left knee (right side of knee cap) started twitching Thursday. By the time I laid in bed, the twitches were very frequent. By the time I was about to go to sleep, my leg felt like it was burning inside and kind of hurt... from my hip to my foot. Was hard to fall asleep.

 

Next day the whole leg was sore like I had a hard workout the day before (haven't done anything strenuous or injured it). Just a couple twitches.

 

Now today, it felt much better most of the day. But a few hours back, it started feeling like something was sharply poking my ankle, but nothing was. I started getting a pins and needles feeling shortly after throughout my whole leg. Hip to toes. It's felt like that over an hour now. Almost like it's asleep. Also feeling it slightly in my left hand.

 

I've tried massaging it repeatedly, have stretched, taken a couple walks, taken magnesium. This is weird and really bothering me. As if I need anything else on the list.

 

I'm getting concerned it could be something serious.

 

Have others experienced something similar? Part of my reaction still? Xanax side effect???

[ChessieCat]

Hi there,

 

paresthesia-pins-needles-numbness-tingling-burning-sensations/

 

The best way to search this site is to use your favourite search engine and type in survivingantidepressants.org plus the topic you are looking for.  In this case I typed in pins and needles.

[Fresh]

Thanks Chessie.

See also "Tension , pain , twitches , spasms in muscles and joints" here

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6504-tension-pain-twitches-spasms-in-muscles-and-joints/

[Colonial]

I had an reaction to the antibiotics Levaquin and Cipro that was a lot like that!  It would feel like bugs were crawling on me, or pin pricks, or then my legs would go numb.  Had it on and off for about 3 months.

 

The best thing for it is the xanax, it's because your nerve endings are over stimulated.  The xanax helped me tremendously, as it works for more than just typical anxiety.