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23 minutes ago, Ather said:

 

Thank you for your encouraging reply :) 

Another important question is that do you stay busy, do you have a job ? Asking this because when I am busy I don't even notice it but when I am free it comes and then grows louder :D 

Do you take any supplement like magnesium or melatonin ?

 

Hello,

 

I do not take any supplements, vitamins, minerals, or anything else besides a mostly health diet, coffee and tea, and a cold beer or glass of red wine.

 

I do work and stay as active as possible, and it does help with ignoring the tinnitus, but it has been time that has helped the most; time for healing to happen.

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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Hello all,   Although it has been awhile, I am still here!  Lets get right to the questions posted above and then I will post a brief update on how I am doing.

Greetings Everyone,

 

It is time for my 4 year update.  Yes that is right, I have been off of medication for over 4 complete years now and I am into year number 5.  I clearly remember reading a success story right here on SA by a member called Lossleader when I was at the 1 year mark and thinking, “There is no possible way I can endure this hell for 4.5 years like he did!”  But now I am quickly approaching that length of time and it is hard for me to believe, but time passes, we heal, a new day dawns for us and we begin to live life once again.

 

So how am I doing now at the 4 year mark?  Well I wish I could say I was completely healed and done with withdrawal and recovery, but that is not the case; I still have work to do.  But I am so much better!  3 years ago I was almost completely non-functional, nearly bedridden, in complete terror much of the time, thinking that life had no purpose for me, and that I was going to remain in withdrawal hell for the rest of my life.  Wrong!

 

These days I still deal with stomach issues of pain and bloating, sleep challenges, nerve pain, body temperature regulation, tinnitus, the odd brain zap every now and then, and some occasional emotional issues.  But, these symptoms and troubles are nothing like I once dealt with!  They are more mild in intensity, don’t last as long, and don’t keep me from living my life.  I am human, I sometimes feel discourage that I am not completely healthy and healed, but all I have to do is look back a few short years and I feel encouraged by how far I have come.

 

So any words of wisdom that I can share with everyone?  Just the same message that I have been sharing; look for anything good that you can find and hang on to it!  This challenge requires that we look for and hold onto something positive, no matter how incredibly small, to keep our hope alive and maintain our strength and determination to keep going.  Sometimes it is just not possible and we feel too miserable to find a shred of goodness in our situation.

 

Very few people will ever suffer like we do, so it is understandable that we may be despondent at times; angry, and ready to give up; but this does not mean that we are not healing.  We are healing, we just haven’t seen the results of the healing and we think it means that nothing will ever change, but it will!  For me the changes happened ever so slowly, inch by inch in an almost imperceptible fashion.  But over time those tiny changes added up to improvements that I could start to see and feel.  This is why I remain positive about my complete recovery given enough time and patience on my part; I have to be patient and let the healing continue even if it has been 4 years.  And I know from my experience, that in an overall sense, it gets easier the longer I go.

 

So I am excited to see where I will be in 6 months or 12 months, after more healing has happened and I am ever closer to completely recovering from withdrawal.  And the very good news is that it can be the same for you!  Just keep going!

 

So please don’t despair!  Even if you have seen no improvements and it has been years of endless suffering and misery, it can still happen.  Just hang on!

 

All the best,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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4 minutes ago, pug said:

Greetings Everyone,

 

It is time for my 4 year update.  Yes that is right, I have been off of medication for over 4 complete years now and I am into year number 5.  I clearly remember reading a success story right here on SA by a member called Lossleader when I was at the 1 year mark and thinking, “There is no possible way I can endure this hell for 4.5 years like he did!”  But now I am quickly approaching that length of time and it is hard for me to believe, but time passes, we heal, a new day dawns for us and we begin to live life once again.

 

So how am I doing now at the 4 year mark?  Well I wish I could say I was completely healed and done with withdrawal and recovery, but that is not the case; I still have work to do.  But I am so much better!  3 years ago I was almost completely non-functional, nearly bedridden, in complete terror much of the time, thinking that life had no purpose for me, and that I was going to remain in withdrawal hell for the rest of my life.  Wrong!

 

These days I still deal with stomach issues of pain and bloating, sleep challenges, nerve pain, body temperature regulation, tinnitus, the odd brain zap every now and then, and some occasional emotional issues.  But, these symptoms and troubles are nothing like I once dealt with!  They are more mild in intensity, don’t last as long, and don’t keep me from living my life.  I am human, I sometimes feel discourage that I am not completely healthy and healed, but all I have to do is look back a few short years and I feel encouraged by how far I have come.

 

So any words of wisdom that I can share with everyone?  Just the same message that I have been sharing; look for anything good that you can find and hang on to it!  This challenge requires that we look for and hold onto something positive, no matter how incredibly small, to keep our hope alive and maintain our strength and determination to keep going.  Sometimes it is just not possible and we feel too miserable to find a shred of goodness in our situation.

 

Very few people will ever suffer like we do, so it is understandable that we may be despondent at times; angry, and ready to give up; but this does not mean that we are not healing.  We are healing, we just haven’t seen the results of the healing and we think it means that nothing will ever change, but it will!  For me the changes happened ever so slowly, inch by inch in an almost imperceptible fashion.  But over time those tiny changes added up to improvements that I could start to see and feel.  This is why I remain positive about my complete recovery given enough time and patience on my part; I have to be patient and let the healing continue even if it has been 4 years.  And I know from my experience, that in an overall sense, it gets easier the longer I go.

 

So I am excited to see where I will be in 6 months or 12 months, after more healing has happened and I am ever closer to completely recovering from withdrawal.  And the very good news is that it can be the same for you!  Just keep going!

 

So please don’t despair!  Even if you have seen no improvements and it has been years of endless suffering and misery, it can still happen.  Just hang on!

 

All the best,

 

pug

 

Regular people who are not going through any withdrawal also face many health challenges, upset stomach and Tinnitus are small issues, people are going through extreme sciatica pain and much much more so I think keeping this mindset that we are still going through a withdrawal even after years itself will produce some negative effects, I regularly get this negative thought "23 years on antidepressants" but I quickly respond to it and I tell myself that it is just my "limiting belief" otherwise there are no limits to what our psychology can achieve, really no limits !!

 

By the way have you tried magnesium for the upset stomach at a low dose ?

1995 to 1997: different antidepressants at maintenance dosages along with benzos 3 times a day.  

1998 to 2000: Citalopram 20mg + Benzo twice daily.

2001 to 2015: Sertraline 50 mg + Alprazolam (half of 0.25 mg once daily which is next to nothing)

2016 to 2017: Sertraline 50 mg + Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg (NO BENZO)

2017 to 2018: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 50 mg  (NO BENZO)

2018 (Earlier): Olanzapine (Zyprexa) 5 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg x 2 daily (7 weeks on Olanzapine was a disaster, antipsychotics are not for panic disorder)

2018 August : Sertraline 50 mg for 20 days (couldn't take it any longer) + Clonazepam.

2018 Sept. 1st week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg -- 2018 Sept. 2nd week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 12.5mg +Clonazepam 0.25 mg 

2018 November: Clonazepam 0.50 mg at night (for sleep disturbed by tinnitus)

2019 January to now: Clonazepam 0.25 mg at night and 0.25 mg in the morning.

Remember: Going out for a Walk or for a Change does help, it may take a few days or weeks or months for some, but it definitely helps.

Here is Knowledge for you: The more you Know about your sickness the more bad it is for you, so forget about it !

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I wanted to add that if you have symptoms of upset stomach and tinnitus like I do, you should stop taking Tea, Coffee, and in your case Alcohol too.

 

Limit your sugar intake, I love having sweet things, my sugar levels stay low so I used to take a lot of sweet things in :D but that is gone now since sweets were actually making my tinnitus loud, past week I was having a low sugar diet and 1 day I thought enough was enough so I had a lot of sweet things that day, went to a party that night and I had bowls full of desserts :D I had the worst tinnitus the following day :( 

 

 

1995 to 1997: different antidepressants at maintenance dosages along with benzos 3 times a day.  

1998 to 2000: Citalopram 20mg + Benzo twice daily.

2001 to 2015: Sertraline 50 mg + Alprazolam (half of 0.25 mg once daily which is next to nothing)

2016 to 2017: Sertraline 50 mg + Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg (NO BENZO)

2017 to 2018: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 50 mg  (NO BENZO)

2018 (Earlier): Olanzapine (Zyprexa) 5 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg x 2 daily (7 weeks on Olanzapine was a disaster, antipsychotics are not for panic disorder)

2018 August : Sertraline 50 mg for 20 days (couldn't take it any longer) + Clonazepam.

2018 Sept. 1st week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg -- 2018 Sept. 2nd week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 12.5mg +Clonazepam 0.25 mg 

2018 November: Clonazepam 0.50 mg at night (for sleep disturbed by tinnitus)

2019 January to now: Clonazepam 0.25 mg at night and 0.25 mg in the morning.

Remember: Going out for a Walk or for a Change does help, it may take a few days or weeks or months for some, but it definitely helps.

Here is Knowledge for you: The more you Know about your sickness the more bad it is for you, so forget about it !

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17 hours ago, Ather said:

I wanted to add that if you have symptoms of upset stomach and tinnitus like I do, you should stop taking Tea, Coffee, and in your case Alcohol too.

 

Limit your sugar intake, I love having sweet things, my sugar levels stay low so I used to take a lot of sweet things in :D but that is gone now since sweets were actually making my tinnitus loud, past week I was having a low sugar diet and 1 day I thought enough was enough so I had a lot of sweet things that day, went to a party that night and I had bowls full of desserts :D I had the worst tinnitus the following day :( 

 

 

 

Hello,

 

I appreciate you trying to be helpful, but please do not make broad generalizations and statements as facts; or reserve them for your own personal thread or topic.  What is true for you is not necessarily true for anyone else.

 

I had worse stomach issues and tinnitus when I drank no alcohol or caffeine, ate no sugar, gluten, meat, or processed foods.  I now include those items in my diet and yet my symptoms have improved greatly.

 

Healing is different for everyone, please be respectful of that.

 

Thank you.

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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18 hours ago, pug said:

 

Hello,

 

I appreciate you trying to be helpful, but please do not make broad generalizations and statements as facts; or reserve them for your own personal thread or topic.  What is true for you is not necessarily true for anyone else.

 

I had worse stomach issues and tinnitus when I drank no alcohol or caffeine, ate no sugar, gluten, meat, or processed foods.  I now include those items in my diet and yet my symptoms have improved greatly.

 

Healing is different for everyone, please be respectful of that.

 

Thank you.

 

pug

 

Hi and you are most welcome,

 

Your symptoms have improved because of you taking alcohol, caffeine, sugar, processed food or because of Time, that is debatable.

 

This is an open forum, I'll throw in my input, without disrespecting anyone, you don't need to follow my advise, it is not a compulsion.

 

Good wishes from my side,

 

Ather

 

 

 

 

 

1995 to 1997: different antidepressants at maintenance dosages along with benzos 3 times a day.  

1998 to 2000: Citalopram 20mg + Benzo twice daily.

2001 to 2015: Sertraline 50 mg + Alprazolam (half of 0.25 mg once daily which is next to nothing)

2016 to 2017: Sertraline 50 mg + Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg (NO BENZO)

2017 to 2018: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 50 mg  (NO BENZO)

2018 (Earlier): Olanzapine (Zyprexa) 5 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg x 2 daily (7 weeks on Olanzapine was a disaster, antipsychotics are not for panic disorder)

2018 August : Sertraline 50 mg for 20 days (couldn't take it any longer) + Clonazepam.

2018 Sept. 1st week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg -- 2018 Sept. 2nd week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 12.5mg +Clonazepam 0.25 mg 

2018 November: Clonazepam 0.50 mg at night (for sleep disturbed by tinnitus)

2019 January to now: Clonazepam 0.25 mg at night and 0.25 mg in the morning.

Remember: Going out for a Walk or for a Change does help, it may take a few days or weeks or months for some, but it definitely helps.

Here is Knowledge for you: The more you Know about your sickness the more bad it is for you, so forget about it !

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On 12/13/2018 at 12:05 PM, pug said:

Greetings Everyone,

 

It is time for my 4 year update.  Yes that is right, I have been off of medication for over 4 complete years now and I am into year number 5.  I clearly remember reading a success story right here on SA by a member called Lossleader when I was at the 1 year mark and thinking, “There is no possible way I can endure this hell for 4.5 years like he did!”  But now I am quickly approaching that length of time and it is hard for me to believe, but time passes, we heal, a new day dawns for us and we begin to live life once again.

 

So how am I doing now at the 4 year mark?  Well I wish I could say I was completely healed and done with withdrawal and recovery, but that is not the case; I still have work to do.  But I am so much better!  3 years ago I was almost completely non-functional, nearly bedridden, in complete terror much of the time, thinking that life had no purpose for me, and that I was going to remain in withdrawal hell for the rest of my life.  Wrong!

 

These days I still deal with stomach issues of pain and bloating, sleep challenges, nerve pain, body temperature regulation, tinnitus, the odd brain zap every now and then, and some occasional emotional issues.  But, these symptoms and troubles are nothing like I once dealt with!  They are more mild in intensity, don’t last as long, and don’t keep me from living my life.  I am human, I sometimes feel discourage that I am not completely healthy and healed, but all I have to do is look back a few short years and I feel encouraged by how far I have come.

 

So any words of wisdom that I can share with everyone?  Just the same message that I have been sharing; look for anything good that you can find and hang on to it!  This challenge requires that we look for and hold onto something positive, no matter how incredibly small, to keep our hope alive and maintain our strength and determination to keep going.  Sometimes it is just not possible and we feel too miserable to find a shred of goodness in our situation.

 

Very few people will ever suffer like we do, so it is understandable that we may be despondent at times; angry, and ready to give up; but this does not mean that we are not healing.  We are healing, we just haven’t seen the results of the healing and we think it means that nothing will ever change, but it will!  For me the changes happened ever so slowly, inch by inch in an almost imperceptible fashion.  But over time those tiny changes added up to improvements that I could start to see and feel.  This is why I remain positive about my complete recovery given enough time and patience on my part; I have to be patient and let the healing continue even if it has been 4 years.  And I know from my experience, that in an overall sense, it gets easier the longer I go.

 

So I am excited to see where I will be in 6 months or 12 months, after more healing has happened and I am ever closer to completely recovering from withdrawal.  And the very good news is that it can be the same for you!  Just keep going!

 

So please don’t despair!  Even if you have seen no improvements and it has been years of endless suffering and misery, it can still happen.  Just hang on!

 

All the best,

 

pug

Pug, thank you so much for the encouragement. You keep coming back to encourage others and that is just so appreciated. I only read success stories and yours particular is always on my heart and mind. I feel like I'm going through the same boat that you went through. And it is a rough road and a rough ride. You have been through so much and you deserve so much respect for what you've gone through. Anyways, are you pretty much over the fear, DP and Dr? or does that seem to kind of come back here and there? how about your emotional issues that you had mentioned? Does that include the depression? How is that all for you? Are you pretty much over your head symptoms? Thanks again for coming back and encouraging us. Again, time heals and patience is key with this journey.

Here it goes

 

March 2015- started 5mg Lexapro

November 2015- switched over to Cymbalta 30mg

August 2016- stopped Cymbalta cold turkey

Early December 2016- took Zoloft 25mg 

Tried to then cross taper over to Lexapro 5mg then up to 10mg for a week

 Aug 2017- Stopped lexapro- not sure if seratonin toxicity was present. Er prescribed klonopin- currently tapering .25mg. 

 Sept 2017-Tried resperidal 1mg for two weeks

November 2017- Tried Lexapro again 2.5 mg then to 5mg for two weeks then stopped

 

 

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Also, how is your brain fog??? Sorry to ask so many questions. 

Here it goes

 

March 2015- started 5mg Lexapro

November 2015- switched over to Cymbalta 30mg

August 2016- stopped Cymbalta cold turkey

Early December 2016- took Zoloft 25mg 

Tried to then cross taper over to Lexapro 5mg then up to 10mg for a week

 Aug 2017- Stopped lexapro- not sure if seratonin toxicity was present. Er prescribed klonopin- currently tapering .25mg. 

 Sept 2017-Tried resperidal 1mg for two weeks

November 2017- Tried Lexapro again 2.5 mg then to 5mg for two weeks then stopped

 

 

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On 12/13/2018 at 12:05 PM, pug said:

Greetings Everyone,

 

It is time for my 4 year update.  Yes that is right, I have been off of medication for over 4 complete years now and I am into year number 5.  I clearly remember reading a success story right here on SA by a member called Lossleader when I was at the 1 year mark and thinking, “There is no possible way I can endure this hell for 4.5 years like he did!”  But now I am quickly approaching that length of time and it is hard for me to believe, but time passes, we heal, a new day dawns for us and we begin to live life once again.

 

So how am I doing now at the 4 year mark?  Well I wish I could say I was completely healed and done with withdrawal and recovery, but that is not the case; I still have work to do.  But I am so much better!  3 years ago I was almost completely non-functional, nearly bedridden, in complete terror much of the time, thinking that life had no purpose for me, and that I was going to remain in withdrawal hell for the rest of my life.  Wrong!

 

These days I still deal with stomach issues of pain and bloating, sleep challenges, nerve pain, body temperature regulation, tinnitus, the odd brain zap every now and then, and some occasional emotional issues.  But, these symptoms and troubles are nothing like I once dealt with!  They are more mild in intensity, don’t last as long, and don’t keep me from living my life.  I am human, I sometimes feel discourage that I am not completely healthy and healed, but all I have to do is look back a few short years and I feel encouraged by how far I have come.

 

So any words of wisdom that I can share with everyone?  Just the same message that I have been sharing; look for anything good that you can find and hang on to it!  This challenge requires that we look for and hold onto something positive, no matter how incredibly small, to keep our hope alive and maintain our strength and determination to keep going.  Sometimes it is just not possible and we feel too miserable to find a shred of goodness in our situation.

 

Very few people will ever suffer like we do, so it is understandable that we may be despondent at times; angry, and ready to give up; but this does not mean that we are not healing.  We are healing, we just haven’t seen the results of the healing and we think it means that nothing will ever change, but it will!  For me the changes happened ever so slowly, inch by inch in an almost imperceptible fashion.  But over time those tiny changes added up to improvements that I could start to see and feel.  This is why I remain positive about my complete recovery given enough time and patience on my part; I have to be patient and let the healing continue even if it has been 4 years.  And I know from my experience, that in an overall sense, it gets easier the longer I go.

 

So I am excited to see where I will be in 6 months or 12 months, after more healing has happened and I am ever closer to completely recovering from withdrawal.  And the very good news is that it can be the same for you!  Just keep going!

 

So please don’t despair!  Even if you have seen no improvements and it has been years of endless suffering and misery, it can still happen.  Just hang on!

 

All the best,

 

pug

 

Thank you Pug. As I lie here bedridden and despondent, I am clinging to your words.  I feel very far from healing and I'm scared.  I hope someday to write a success story. 

 Sept 2013-Apr 2014:  After death of my mom put on as series of meds. Zoloft 6 days, Lexapro1 day, Nortriptyline 10 days, Liquid Prozac 1 week, Cymbalta 1 week.

Got off Clonzapam: 1/2014-9/2014. After given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs

Completed Remeron taper: 41.25 -0.025mgs  1/2015-4 2017. 

Completed Lamictal Taper: 200mgs-0.05 mgs 7/ 2015-11/2018. 

Clonazapam  December 2018. 0.625 Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping and not thinking straight. 28 March, 2019  4% taper Total: .625mgai   26 May, 2019  4% taper Total: .575 mgai,   24 June, 2019 2.5 % taper  10 Clonzapam tablets weigh1.999 mgpw  Average  200 mgpw.  0.0073mgai 9AM, 0.0073mgai 3PM, .415mgai, Total: 561mgai,  10 July, 2019 (Compounded pills) .0073mgai 9AM,.0073mgai 3PM, .415mgai,

Total .561mgai   26 August, 2019 (Back to regular pills due to bad reaction) .0078mgai 9AM, .01075mgai 3PM, .360mgai PM, Total: .545mgai   26 Sept. 2019 .0775mgai 9AM, .1mgai 3PM, 0.350mgai PM: Total: .5275mgai   31 Oct, 2019 .0750mgai 9AM, .0925mgai 3PM, 0.340mgai 930PM, Total: .5075mgai,   30 Nov. 2019 .0775mgai 9AM, .0825mgai 3PM, .3325mgai 9:30PM, Total:.490mgai   31 Dec. 2019 .0775mgai 9AM,  .080mgai 3PM, .3225mgai 9:30PM,  Total: .4775mgai   31 Jan. 2020 .0725mgai 9AM, .0750mgai 3pm, .315mgai 9:30PM, Total: .4625mgai    29 Feb. 2020  .0675mgai 9AM, .0675 3PM, .305 mgai 9PM Total: .440mgai 31 March 2020 .065mgai 9AM,  .065mgai 3PM, .2925mgai 10PM, Total: 4225mgai  30 April 2020 .0625mgai 9AM, .0625mgai 3PM, .2775mgai 10PM  Total: .4025mgai 31 May 2020 .0625mgai 9AM, .0625 mgai 3PM, .2526 mgai 10PM, Total: .3775mgai  30 June 2020 .0625mgai 9AM, .0625mgai 3PM  .2175 mgai 10PM Total .3425mgai.   31 July 2020 .0575 mgai 9AM .0550 mgai 3PM .180mgai 10PM Total .2925mgai  31 August 2020 .0475mgai 9AM, 0.045mgai 3PM, .01475mgai 10PM Total: .2375mgai  30 September 2020 0.0375mgai 9AM 0.035mgai 3PM 0.110mgai 10PM  Total: .1825mgai 31 October 2020 .0325mgai 9AM .0350mgai 3PM  .0725mgai 9PM Total: .14mgai

30 Nov. 2020 .03mgai 9AM  .0276mgai 3PM 0.450mgai 9PM Total: .1025mgai

 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs,  Vitamin D, Vitamin C, Magnesium Glycinate

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On 6/5/2017 at 8:11 PM, pug said:

 

Nick,

 

I did have anhedonia, and I felt dead inside like a zombie; and yes I am now human again!  I felt disconnected from myself and everyone and everything around me, like I was enclosed in a small space with no contact with the outside world even when I was moving around in it. A friend or family member could have died right in front of me and I would not have felt anything.  It was very hard to deal with and I was sure that I was doomed to feel that way forever; but I was wrong!  My emotions came back in big swings for me mostly; breaking down crying for 1/2 hour, or having a lot of anger and irritation, being over emotional, feeling a glimmer of joy for a few minutes, and then back to no emotion.  I had a very hard time controlling my emotions when they started to return, so that was another challenge.  Slowly but surely my emotions have evened out and are much more stable and "normal" (or what is normal for me and feels right). I feel again; the full spectrum of human emotions and it is is wonderful.  You will too, just get through each day as best as you can and time will bring your emotions back on line.  I am hoping that it will happen for you very soon.

 

All the best.

 

pug

That is really giving me hope. 

My anhedonia is incredibly bad and almost painful.

i am still in a very long taper thus healing must wait for another two years. 

 

2010-2018 sertralin, venlafaxin, cymbalta 120 mg, march bupropio, Lorazepam 4 to 0,5 mg qetiapine 200-400 mg Apr mirtazapin 30 - 45 mg, lo tapered, to 0; Apr switch to diazepam 3 mg; jun/jul 15mg, taper to approx. 4,5 mg, Aug: 200 to 400 mg q, 50 mg levomepromazine, m 45 to 30 mg; since tapered q 400-230 mg, m 30 to 15 mg, 1dez m to 16 mg, 4dez 250 mg q, 31. dec 200 mg q

March 1, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,5 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine

March 3, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,0 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine

March 4, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,2 mg diazepam,16 mg mirtazapine, 

june 5, 2019 - 100 mg quetiapine, 3 mg Diazepam, 12,185 mg mirtazapine 

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9 hours ago, Liamb123456 said:

Pug hey again we talked in recent comments did you ever have this symptom the internal buzzing and vibrations in your body.. 

Hello Liamb . You are not alone I have the same issue going on That you can’t explain to people .. I also came up with a term that I call brain vomiting it’s like when you Throw up and you have that burning sensation well that’s the feeling I get in my head sometimes which has slowly gotten better .. I have Severe itching and burning with rashes .. it all moves around but as pug says its by inches we heal .all the best of healing to all of us and may g-d make us whole again .

Zoloft around 3 years 100mg .. I can’t remember the start date but it was discontinued in July of 2018

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TryingToHoldOn

Hi Pug.

 

Did you ever deal with terrible forehead pressure that made it impossible for you to function?  Mine gives the feeling of being chemically and physically lobotomized.  This is my scariest symptom as if feels as though I’ve sustained a serious brain injury to my frontal lobe.  It has been ongoing for 21 months now with the intensity fluctuating but always affecting my ability to function.

 

Thank you for continuing to update your progress and answering questions.  I am very happy that healing has found you.

Merry Christmas to you!

Mid 2014 - June 2016 (~ 2.5 yrs): sertraline 75mg. Under advice of my Pysch NP, weaned off in 1 month

Sept 2017 - Feb 2017 (6 months): Latuda (dose 20mg up to 80mg). Under advice of Psych NP, weaned off in 6 weeks (Jan - mid Feb). Tirtated down 20mg every 2 weeks.

Nov 2017 - Feb 2017 (3 months): lamictal 100mg. Abruptly taken off. This was the "wean": 100mg, 50mg, then off

Feb 2017: sertraline 150mg for 1 week to bring me out of a severe suicidal depression. Abruptly stopped due to serotonin syndrome. Tried to reinstate 50mg a week later, but the serotonin syndrome symptoms came back. Not possible to reinstate sertraline.

March 2017: remeron 7.5mg. Took one dose that knocked me out for two days. Refused to take it again

February 2017 - March 2017: Ativan 1mg. Took 5 pills total spread out over the course of 3 weeks. No longer taking it.

6/16/18 - 6/26: celexa 1.25mg

6/27/18 - 6/29: celexa 2.5mg, 6/29 had burning and agitation within 30min of dose

6/30/18 - present: celexa 1.25mg

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On 12/15/2018 at 11:58 AM, bgoggles1 said:

Pug, thank you so much for the encouragement. You keep coming back to encourage others and that is just so appreciated. I only read success stories and yours particular is always on my heart and mind. I feel like I'm going through the same boat that you went through. And it is a rough road and a rough ride. You have been through so much and you deserve so much respect for what you've gone through. Anyways, are you pretty much over the fear, DP and Dr? or does that seem to kind of come back here and there? how about your emotional issues that you had mentioned? Does that include the depression? How is that all for you? Are you pretty much over your head symptoms? Thanks again for coming back and encouraging us. Again, time heals and patience is key with this journey.

 

Hello,   Yes the fear DP and DR are all but gone.  I may have the faintest hint of it that is so mild I have to question myself, “Is this what I think it is?”  But then I am off to another task and I have forgotten about it, so essentially it is pretty much gone.  Emotionally I can sometimes feel a bit more anger or sadness than is appropriate for the situation, but it usually passes quickly and is just a minor annoyance.  No depression, or anxiety, that is all but gone too!

 

Head symptoms and brain fog are gone most of the time or just a minor symptom that does not inhibit me in any real sense, shows up rarely, and is gone quickly.  Compared to where I was a couple of years ago, any of these minor symptoms that might show up for a bit of time are nothing for me to complain about.  I mean, if I am feeling this much better now, I know I will be feeling better and better as time goes on, and it will be the same for you!  So just keep going and don’t quit!  You can do it and the reward of no longer being a drug-slave are worth the cost in my experience and opinion.   Wishing you the best,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 12/15/2018 at 12:12 PM, Hibari said:

 

Thank you Pug. As I lie here bedridden and despondent, I am clinging to your words.  I feel very far from healing and I'm scared.  I hope someday to write a success story. 

 

Hey there,   You will write that story!  Just keep moving forward in the best way you can and allow time for you brain and body to heal.  The miracle of time passing and healing happening is one that has to be experienced to be believed, and it will happen for you just as it has for so many of us survivors.  It can happen!   Hoping that you might be seeing some healing,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 12/20/2018 at 1:50 AM, Liamb123456 said:

Pug hey again we talked in recent comments did you ever have this symptom the internal buzzing and vibrations in your body.. 

 

Hello,   Absolutely!  It was miserable and debilitating.  Mine tended to be mostly in my head, but it would happen throughout my body also.  I remember thinking, “How can this be caused by quitting a drug?”  If it wasn’t for this forum and the success stories that told me this symptom was part of the process of recovery for many people, who knows what would have happened?  I doubt it would have been good!  But ever so slowly over time it gotten better and now it is pretty much gone.   I hope yours is improving!

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 12/20/2018 at 2:58 AM, Tanha said:

That is really giving me hope. 

My anhedonia is incredibly bad and almost painful.

i am still in a very long taper thus healing must wait for another two years. 

 

 

Hi there,  

 

I believe that healing is happening during your taper, even though it may not seem like it.  Any reduction in medication, however slow and small, surely must allow the body the opportunity to begin the healing process.  The healing may not be apparent and the suffering may seem endless, but one day the tipping point will come and you will begin to feel better.  Just do you best to keep going through all of the challenges of this process and your reward will be waiting for you; to be healthy and happy once again.  I never believed it would happen for me and feeling good again seemed impossible, but it did happen and I am feeling good again!  So please keep going!

 

 pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 12/20/2018 at 3:34 PM, TryingToHoldOn said:

Hi Pug.

 

Did you ever deal with terrible forehead pressure that made it impossible for you to function?  Mine gives the feeling of being chemically and physically lobotomized.  This is my scariest symptom as if feels as though I’ve sustained a serious brain injury to my frontal lobe.  It has been ongoing for 21 months now with the intensity fluctuating but always affecting my ability to function.

 

Thank you for continuing to update your progress and answering questions.  I am very happy that healing has found you.

Merry Christmas to you!

 

Hello,

 

Yes I had many, many bizarre and strange head sensations.  I often felt like part of my brain was missing, as if there was a hole there, just blank and empty.  At other times it felt like a bomb had exploded in my brain and my brain was scattered about inside of my head.  Or, my brain felt heavy on one side or the other, or buzzed and sizzled like a high tension power line.  It sounds crazy to anyone who has not been through it!  But mine was all withdrawal related and it is has all slowly went away until now, it is almost completely gone!  So things will get better, just keep going and don’t give up!   All the best to you,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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10 hours ago, pug said:

 

Hi there,  

 

I believe that healing is happening during your taper, even though it may not seem like it.  Any reduction in medication, however slow and small, surely must allow the body the opportunity to begin the healing process.  The healing may not be apparent and the suffering may seem endless, but one day the tipping point will come and you will begin to feel better.  Just do you best to keep going through all of the challenges of this process and your reward will be waiting for you; to be healthy and happy once again.  I never believed it would happen for me and feeling good again seemed impossible, but it did happen and I am feeling good again!  So please keep going!

 

 pug

Dear @pug

 

how long did you wait within taper to get better? I know everybody is different but i am interested.

 

how are you now in terms of anhedonia and anxiety?

 

i have such a looong taper ahead of me. How long did you taper?

 

you know, this withdrawl really makes me bedridden. 

I cannot really control my body or interest.

2010-2018 sertralin, venlafaxin, cymbalta 120 mg, march bupropio, Lorazepam 4 to 0,5 mg qetiapine 200-400 mg Apr mirtazapin 30 - 45 mg, lo tapered, to 0; Apr switch to diazepam 3 mg; jun/jul 15mg, taper to approx. 4,5 mg, Aug: 200 to 400 mg q, 50 mg levomepromazine, m 45 to 30 mg; since tapered q 400-230 mg, m 30 to 15 mg, 1dez m to 16 mg, 4dez 250 mg q, 31. dec 200 mg q

March 1, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,5 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine

March 3, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,0 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine

March 4, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,2 mg diazepam,16 mg mirtazapine, 

june 5, 2019 - 100 mg quetiapine, 3 mg Diazepam, 12,185 mg mirtazapine 

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JackieDecides
On 12/28/2018 at 3:07 PM, pug said:

If it wasn’t for this forum and the success stories that told me this symptom was part of the process of recovery for many people, who knows what would have happened?

 

❤️

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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Hi Pug,

 

Thank you so much for your success story.  I am still struggling with intrusives and fear mainly--so distressing!!!

 

Happy New Year and thanks again.

 

Karen

Zoloft:  1997-2010

Effexor:  2010-2011 cross taper to Prozac

Prozac:  2011, 60mg, current 17mg

Ativan:  2005-2006 PRN, 2007 daily, tapered off June-Sept 2011

Mirtazapine:  2010-2012

Lamictal:  2011, 100mg, current 45mg

Klonopin:  Sept 2011- Feb 2012 3mg

Seroquel:  2013, 150mg, current 45mg

 

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EyeOnThePrize

I just finished your entire post. Thank you for sharing your success story and for coming back to provide updates. Also for taking the time to respond to each poster's questions. As you well know, there are days when hope is the only thing we've got and you are very kind to give us some.

 

 

Oct 1995-May 1996 Zoloft  2002-2004 Effexor (150mg???) Cold turkey 

2007 Klonopin Cold turkey  2006-2009 Effexor (150mg-300mg) Cold turkey

2011-2012 Prozac cold turkey (pregnancy)

2013-2015 Zoloft (50mg, maybe up to 100mg??) Cold turkey bc I switched to Effexor 2015-March 2018 Effexor (37.5-225mg) Cold turkey 

September 2017-March 2018 Klonopin (approx .5mg as needed but became daily for a few months) Short taper

September 2017-March 2018 Adderall/Vyvanse (10mg-20mg) Short taper

2011-present Lunesta or Ambien. Breaks during my pregnancies. 10mg ambien, tapered to 0 mg and took last dose February 2019

July 2018- Buspar, 30mg, began taper after a few weeks and reached 0mg in December 2018

Sept/18 - After a disastrous attempt at reinstatement, ended up on Klonopin and tapered over the next 2 1/2 months. Last dose December 2nd, 2018

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 12/31/2018 at 7:20 PM, karenp said:

Hi Pug,

 

Thank you so much for your success story.  I am still struggling with intrusives and fear mainly--so distressing!!!

 

Happy New Year and thanks again.

 

Karen

 How long are you off meds did you cold turkey 

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On 12/28/2018 at 6:09 PM, pug said:

 

Hello,

So things will get better, just keep going and don’t give up!   All the best to you,

 

pug

Hi Pug,

Thank you for sharing your success.  It is giving me lots of encouragement and sheer enjoyable reading!  I have been drug free for a few weeks now, not even counting anymore.  My primary symptoms now are tinnitus and what seems to be emotional over-reaction (irritability, crying, worrying).  I'm not acting crazy, but responding emotionally which I am not used to after years of blunted emotions.  I try to keep my spirits up about the tinnitus symptoms, hoping it will get better in time; but it's hard to hold on sometimes.  Any suggestions would be so appreciated.  I do not eat salt, flour or sugar.  I don't exercise much due to the cold weather and resistance to going to the gym.

Best wishes,

RealMe

 

Alcohol periodic excessive 1963-1976, Valium sporadic 1964-1973,  Imipramine off & on 1982-1985, Fluoxetine 10mg-80 mg. Oct., 1995-Jan., 2014; Cymbalta, other ADs 1/2014-3/2014; Abilify 5 mg. 3/2014 - 8/8/17; Trintellix 20 mg. 3/2014 - 9/2017; Propranolol 60-80 mg. sporadically Sept-Oct, 2017; Seroquel few days Sept 2017 (c/t); Wellbutrin 150 mg. Sept, 2017 updosed to 300 mg. few days till c/t Oct 8, 2017, fish oil, vitD, vitE Oct 16, 2017-pres. Lipoflavonoid 4/2017-pres.  Fluoxetine 10 mg. Sept-Oct 8, 2017, 20 mg. 10/9- 10/15; 10 mg. 10/16 - 12/29;  9 mg. 12/30 - 2/9; 2 mL liquid (8.1mg) 2/10 - 3/7; 1.8 mL (7.29 mg) 3/8 -3/20; 1.6 mL (6.561mg) 3/20-4/2; 1.4 mL (5.9 mg) 4/3-4/14; 1mL (4 mg.) 4/15-4/22; .9mL (3.6mg) 4/23-5/1; .81mL (3.24 mg) 5/2-5/24; .73mL (2.916mg.) 5/25-6/8; .65mL 6/9-6/23; .6mL 6/24-7/17; .58mL 7/18-7/28; .525mL 7/29-8/13; .5 mL 8/14-21; .45mL 8/22-31; .4mL 9/2-21; .35mL 9/22-10/4; .3mL 10/5-28; .25mL 10/28-11/10; .2mL 11/11-11/24; .18mL 11/25-12/3; .1mL 12/4-12/18. Zero-12/19/18-present.

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On 10/24/2017 at 9:31 AM, MaryDavid said:

  For one reason or another I have a big dislike for people I used to call friends and other random people.  I feel such intense negativity towards them.  I get so angry over little things.  I just dont want to engage with people.  Certain noise and sound irritates me and certain types of light. Intense rage too.  Its just so relentless.   

 

 

I have this too! I didn't have the words to describe it, thank you for that!

Has this healed for you? gotten better at all? 

It is so hard for me to deal with this bizarre symptom. I can look at someones face that I obviously love and it's like I can't stand them and I'm filled with hate?!. For example my dear mother and even grandma! I don't even have to know the person. I have literally felt that way towards trees! It makes me feel literally insane and out of control. 

Did you ever have a weird symptom where peoples faces look distorted or "not right" ? It's like a very bad trip. 

I really hope this got better for you. Please let me know! 

med history: 17 years total

Concerta: 2 yrs - cold turkey, brought on first "depression" 

Short trials of Zoloft and Effexor: 1-3 years - multiple cold turkey's brought on OCD intrusive thoughts for the first time

Lexapro 15-20 mg (16 yrs)  - tried to quit once, cold turkey, worst WD ever, had to go on to 20mg to stop WD

Welbutrin 150mg (8-ish yrs) NO w/d symptoms from CT

Adderall 5-7.5mg (8-10-ish yrs) quit CT, brought on many WD symptoms, but manageable. 

 

Begin taper March 2018 Currently on 4.4 mg lexapro - down from 20mg

 

Symptoms depression, horrible intrusive thoughts and urges, new onset PMS/PMDD, constant extreme irritation and anger, visual hallucinations, irrational thinking patterns, panic, nausea, dizzy, intolerance to working out, chemical sensitivities, noise sensitivities, memory issues, heart palps, etc. 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 12/29/2018 at 1:30 AM, Tanha said:

Dear @pug

 

how long did you wait within taper to get better? I know everybody is different but i am interested.

 

how are you now in terms of anhedonia and anxiety?

 

i have such a looong taper ahead of me. How long did you taper?

 

you know, this withdrawl really makes me bedridden. 

I cannot really control my body or interest.

 

Hello,

 

I did not taper, I cold-turkeyed.  I started feeling better at about 2.5 years, or at least that is when hope returned to me that I would make it through withdrawal.  Anhedonia and anxiety are almost all gone, very little of either shows up for me and it is very minor.

 

I know how terrible withdrawal can be and I completely understand the distress that you are in.  I also know that we can recover from it and regain our lives once more, we just have to keep going!  Allow time to pass and the healing will happen.  It has happened for me and so many others, it can happen for you also!

 

Wishing you the best,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 12/31/2018 at 11:20 AM, karenp said:

Hi Pug,

 

Thank you so much for your success story.  I am still struggling with intrusives and fear mainly--so distressing!!!

 

Happy New Year and thanks again.

 

Karen

 

Hello,

 

  Intrusive thoughts are a real misery of a symptom and I understand the pain you are going through in dealing with them, and fear is as bad or worse, at least for me it was.  Somehow the healing happens and these symptoms will start to lessen and go away.  It is so very strange to observe it happening within yourself, but it does happen and then we can move on from it.  As time goes by I think less and less about these symptoms and the memory of their terrible discomfort fades also.  

 

Hang in there, you can do this!

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 1/3/2019 at 3:17 PM, EyeOnThePrize said:

I just finished your entire post. Thank you for sharing your success story and for coming back to provide updates. Also for taking the time to respond to each poster's questions. As you well know, there are days when hope is the only thing we've got and you are very kind to give us some.

 

 

 

Hi there,

 

Thank you for taking the time to let me know that my story was of help to you.  That is the reason that I returned and started this thread, to hopefully be of service to others.  I do remember the days of hopelessness and desperation and what a comfort it was to read success stories that promised we could heal from this terrible mess.  I truly never thought it would ever happen for me, but the healing did happen and I started to feel better, and it will happen for you as well.

 

Just picture yourself feeling healthy and happy, doing the things that you love, hanging out with friends and family and feeling at ease, laughing and joking, thinking about your future and all the good things ahead for you.  Keep that picture in your mind when the darkness closes in and realize that it is just a matter of time before it becomes your reality.  Do what you need to do to make it through each day and eventually the healing will begin to show itself and you will start to feel better; you just need to keep going!

 

Sending healing thoughts,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 1/13/2019 at 8:32 AM, Liamb123456 said:

 How long are you off meds did you cold turkey 

 

Hello,

 

I have been off of meds for over 4 years now.  I did cold turkey, twice, and I don’t recommend it.  I was ignorant and my doctors were too.  Luckily I got educated with the help of this great website and resource; my former doctors no doubt are still clueless about withdrawal and handing out the same dangerous advice as well as drugs.

 

We can recover!  Never forget that.

 

I hope you are doing well.

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 1/13/2019 at 12:24 PM, RealMe said:

Hi Pug,

Thank you for sharing your success.  It is giving me lots of encouragement and sheer enjoyable reading!  I have been drug free for a few weeks now, not even counting anymore.  My primary symptoms now are tinnitus and what seems to be emotional over-reaction (irritability, crying, worrying).  I'm not acting crazy, but responding emotionally which I am not used to after years of blunted emotions.  I try to keep my spirits up about the tinnitus symptoms, hoping it will get better in time; but it's hard to hold on sometimes.  Any suggestions would be so appreciated.  I do not eat salt, flour or sugar.  I don't exercise much due to the cold weather and resistance to going to the gym.

Best wishes,

RealMe

 

 

Hello,

 

My advise is to read success stories and other positive things to keep your spirits up and your hope alive.  Concentrate on making it through each day knowing that eventually each one of those days will add up and finally some healing will become evident to you.  I know how hard it is to do and the challenge of recovering from this, but I know that it is possible and worth it in the end.

 

Wish you strength and healing,

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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On 1/14/2019 at 5:56 PM, Peachy said:

 

I have this too! I didn't have the words to describe it, thank you for that!

Has this healed for you? gotten better at all? 

It is so hard for me to deal with this bizarre symptom. I can look at someones face that I obviously love and it's like I can't stand them and I'm filled with hate?!. For example my dear mother and even grandma! I don't even have to know the person. I have literally felt that way towards trees! It makes me feel literally insane and out of control. 

Did you ever have a weird symptom where peoples faces look distorted or "not right" ? It's like a very bad trip. 

I really hope this got better for you. Please let me know! 

 

Hello,

 

I am not sure if your question was addressed to me, but I will be happy to chime in and say that I suffered from similar symptoms and they have all gotten better!  The feeling of being out of control and going insane will improve and eventually go away if we can just hang on and let time pass.  Time was the magic that worked for me when all of the other things I tried did not.

 

Hoping that you are doing better.

 

pug

20+ years of Zoloft 50-100 mg CT 03/2014 for 5 months
Back on Prozac 20 mg for 4 months CT since 11/2014
Found this forum the last day of 2014
The secret is to keep going!  Time will heal.


 
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withhopeinmyheart

Hello pug, 

 

thank you so much for your success story and describing in so much detail what it feels like to come back! 

 

I'm new here and just today posted my introduction topic. 

 

Time is the key to healing, yet it terrifies me the most. I reinstated a tiny dose. Do you think it's possible that will make it a bit quicker for me? 

 

Also, I'm terrified of all this. I'm like a tiny mouse wanting to hide from everything in a hole. 

Do you think I can recover even if I don't grow with my improvements? 

If I'm unable to do anything, although trying, will I be okay in the end, when all I can do is wait it out? 

 

I'm so scared of doing it wrong! 

 

Wish you all the best! 

 

withhopeinmyheart

Escitalopram August 2015 - 20mg

Some time in winter 2017 down to 10mg with no problems

May 21 2018 5mg, June 4 2018 2.5mg, June 18 2018 0mg 

October 1 2018 something's wrong 

October 2 2018 arriving in hell

Reinstated 0.25mg

October 27 2018 0.35mg, November 23 2018 0.5mg, November 24 2018 0.6mg

November 28 2018 0.5mg and holding since 

Taking fish oil and magnesium 

L-Thyroxin 50 for Hashimoto's

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Hi Pug.  Pug, I just want to thank you so much for coming back!!!!!  It means so much to me. I am pretty confident and can say all of US!!!!  You are not only sharing your story with us in your healing but you encourage us so beautifully!!!!  I look for your entries regularly.  I do not spend much time on the site but the site is a huge blessing to me because of you and your entries.  Always offering us hope and healing.  Thank you so much. Please continue to come back, if it isn’t asking too much.  You are a blessing as is your cold turkey story!!!!!  More than you can know.  GIGI.  

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On 1/25/2019 at 4:28 PM, pug said:

My advise is to read success stories and other positive things to keep your spirits up and your hope alive.  Concentrate on making it through each day knowing that eventually each one of those days will add up and finally some healing will become evident to you.  I know how hard it is to do and the challenge of recovering from this, but I know that it is possible and worth it in the end.

 

Wish you strength and healing,

Thank you, Pug.  Hope is so important, and you are giving me that.

Best wishes,

RealMe

Alcohol periodic excessive 1963-1976, Valium sporadic 1964-1973,  Imipramine off & on 1982-1985, Fluoxetine 10mg-80 mg. Oct., 1995-Jan., 2014; Cymbalta, other ADs 1/2014-3/2014; Abilify 5 mg. 3/2014 - 8/8/17; Trintellix 20 mg. 3/2014 - 9/2017; Propranolol 60-80 mg. sporadically Sept-Oct, 2017; Seroquel few days Sept 2017 (c/t); Wellbutrin 150 mg. Sept, 2017 updosed to 300 mg. few days till c/t Oct 8, 2017, fish oil, vitD, vitE Oct 16, 2017-pres. Lipoflavonoid 4/2017-pres.  Fluoxetine 10 mg. Sept-Oct 8, 2017, 20 mg. 10/9- 10/15; 10 mg. 10/16 - 12/29;  9 mg. 12/30 - 2/9; 2 mL liquid (8.1mg) 2/10 - 3/7; 1.8 mL (7.29 mg) 3/8 -3/20; 1.6 mL (6.561mg) 3/20-4/2; 1.4 mL (5.9 mg) 4/3-4/14; 1mL (4 mg.) 4/15-4/22; .9mL (3.6mg) 4/23-5/1; .81mL (3.24 mg) 5/2-5/24; .73mL (2.916mg.) 5/25-6/8; .65mL 6/9-6/23; .6mL 6/24-7/17; .58mL 7/18-7/28; .525mL 7/29-8/13; .5 mL 8/14-21; .45mL 8/22-31; .4mL 9/2-21; .35mL 9/22-10/4; .3mL 10/5-28; .25mL 10/28-11/10; .2mL 11/11-11/24; .18mL 11/25-12/3; .1mL 12/4-12/18. Zero-12/19/18-present.

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I can't read your story enough.  I drop my child off at school and go to the local library, log on, read your post and cry.  And cry and cry with misery and a little hope.  I'm not even a year.  Hope I can make it 3.5, if that's how long it takes.  Praying and praying.  Thank you for writing your success story.  It is literally saving my life.

Zoloft  25mg-50mg   1997-December 2017, 100mg  December 1, 2017 - December 30, 2017

Buspar  15mg  December 13, 2017 - December 30, 2017

Lexapro 10mg  December 30, 2017 - January 17, 2018 (cross tapered w/ Zoloft below)

Zoloft 100mg  January 15, 2018 - April 5, 2018, 50mg April 6- April 7, 2018, 25mg April 7 - April 9, 2018

Deplin  15mg   February 13, 2018 - March 30, 2018

Xanax   1mg    January 15, 2018 - March 2018  (as needed-probably took around 10 times?)

Colonzepam 1mg April 11 - April 24, 2018, 0.5mg  April 25- May 2, 2018, 0.25mg May 3 - May 13, 2018

Remeron 7.5mg April 25, 2018 - May 15, 2018

Paxil 10mg  May 22, 2018- May 23, 2018

Vitamin D 2000IU and Vitamin B12 3000mcg  November 2017 - March 2018

Cav. filled w/ local anesthesia May 14, 2018, Colonoscopy & Endoscopy May 2018, completely under for both

 

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Hi Pug,

 

thanks for your kind words.  I am in what feels like a big setback after having to deal with a health issue which is still ongoing and the holidays and whatever else.  It’s really scaring me the intensity of the symptoms that have returned and the way they have morphed.  The fear and the thoughts are worse, more strange and unnerving than ever.  

 

Im trying to maintain the perspective that this is still just all part of the healing process.  But wow my faith in healing is being challenged big time right now.

 

warmly,

karen 

Zoloft:  1997-2010

Effexor:  2010-2011 cross taper to Prozac

Prozac:  2011, 60mg, current 17mg

Ativan:  2005-2006 PRN, 2007 daily, tapered off June-Sept 2011

Mirtazapine:  2010-2012

Lamictal:  2011, 100mg, current 45mg

Klonopin:  Sept 2011- Feb 2012 3mg

Seroquel:  2013, 150mg, current 45mg

 

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