Carmie: accidently doubling up on Seroquel one day while tapering

[Carmie]

13 hours ago, Kostas said:

Very glad to see you back dear Carmie!!!😊

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

16 hours ago, LostInCanada said:

So nice to hear from you @Carmie

What a great feeling when you get some things crossed off the to do list. Glad you are staying safe but not having to be isolated.

You are always so positive despite all your struggles. Thank you. ♥️

Hi there Kostas and Mittenraised,

 

Thanks for your kind words. I hope you’re both coping okay. Well I thought I might do another gratitude list today, so here goes:

 

1. It’s been raining a bit on and off today. Love the rain. Love the sun too. Grateful for both.

 

2. My husband’s carer got me some veggies. I got okra, sweet potato, onions, wombok, kale and avocados. Yummy!

 

3. I’ve just been chilling today, nothing much happening. Been watching some YouTube videos and I’m watching Inspector Lynley at the moment. I’m grateful that YouTube premium gets rid of commercials. I’ve been paying for YouTube for ages, it’s great watching it without ads. 
 

4. Last night I was watching music videos on YouTube. I can’t go to concerts anymore because of my lungs, but I can still watch them on YouTube.

 

5. I’ve been finding EFT so great. I joined an online annual EFT event and since then I’ve been doing it daily. 
 

A friend of mine is an EFT practitioner and I can get free sessions with her too. I was feeling so stuck because struggling to breathe most of the time had me pretty much in a freeze state. The EFT sessions with my friend snapped me out of it a bit.

 

I never thought that doing the EFT on my own would get the results I wanted, but I’m now finding that I’m actually getting shifts on my own. Yay!!! Occasionally if I’m really stuck I’ll ask my friend to help me. 

 

6. I’m grateful for stickers, big kid that I am. I just used some sunflower ones.

 

7. I’m grateful I have a roof over my head.

 

8. I’m grateful I can read and write.

 

9. I’m grateful I have vision and I can see.

 

10. I’m grateful I have hearing and can hear all the beautiful sounds around. I just wish I didn’t have to hear the sound of my cat meowing in the morning for food😹. Boy, she’s persistent! 

 

Well that’s another gratitude list down. I’m lying on my couch, breathing is bad, I’ve got a slight breeze from the fan, my cat is chilling on one of the lounge chairs. Time to watch some more of inspector Lynley now.

 

Sending you hugs🤗

[Carmie]

…Pondering:

My brain is always in lala land🤪due to CFS, brain fog is thick. I struggle to think clearly a lot and sometimes when I write down things to others I don’t realise until later that I made a mistake. Good ol’ editing comes in handy then.

 

For example today I wrote on a thread @Vancouver1986 I was trying to explain how not to get bubbles in the syringe. I was thinking about two different scenarios, but put them into the same text. Deleted some of it. The first was when I actually measure the water to make up the solution. I’ve always measured the water with a syringe, but I should have measured it in one of those measuring tubes. I can’t change that now though because the measurements will be out of whack as syringes work differently. 
 

Anyway, if anyone hasn’t  started measuring their homemade solution as yet, start by using a measuring cylinder.

 

If you’re using a syringe to measure the water, it’s a good idea to put the whole syringe under water and then draw it, as I find I get much less bubbles that way. Sometimes you might have to do it more than once.

 

As regards getting the bubbles out of the syringe when you’re about to use your formula, I keep the bottom of the syringe under the liquid and I pump it a number of times until there are hardly any bubbles.🫧🫧

 

I hope everyone on this site has been doing the best they can. This is certainly a rough and very slow journey. I’m not doing too bad withdrawal wise at the moment as I’m going so slow. I still get symptoms, we all do, no matter how slow we go.

 

I’m more stressed about struggling to breathe all the time. Stupid immune system and lungs! That being said, I’m still finding daily things that bring some joy into my life.

 

I haven’t been on this site much because of my health and everything being overwhelming. Reading about people’s suffering makes me sad. My iPad died too. I still haven’t gotten around to buying a new one. I’m using my phone and the writing is small, but I thought I’d pop in again anyway. I haven’t really missed my iPad. It’s good not staring at the screen all of the time.

 

Anyway, all any of us can do is to take a day at a time, an hour at a time, a minute at a time.

 

Anyway, that’s enough pondering for this evening. I need to chill a bit before bed. I slept well last night, but the night before I was still awake at 3am. No fun having breathing problems in the middle of the night. 
 

It’s nearly 9pm. I’ll probably go to bed in an hour and a half or so. Okay, unwinding time.

 

Sending much love to everyone on this site💛

[Carmie]

Didn’t have a good day, but I’m going to attempt a gratitude list nevertheless. My breathing is bad, as well as the CFS, and off course, one is always in withdrawal. Let’s see how I go with my list:

 

1. I managed to do a little EFT. Even on days where I’m barely functional I’ve gotten into the habit of doing a little EFT. I’ve turned it into a daily habit now for well over a month I think. Lots of tears shed through this at times. 
 

It works really well. On days where I can concentrate a bit more I try and do the deeper stuff, but on other days I just do general tapping to help me get through the day. I’ll tap along to some videos, I’ll just change some of the wording to make it more relevant to me.

 

2. I’ve been lying down for most of the day, I’m grateful I’ve got somewhere comfy to lie down.

 

3. I had a little strength to take the rubbish downstairs to the bins before.

 

4. I’ve got a nice scenery YouTube video on with light jazz at the moment. It’s an apartment overlooking the beach in the evening. The light jazz videos are very chill. 
 

5. I just took my meds and I still had some of the formula made up. When I’m not too functional it’s a bit of a nuisance to have to make up the liquid mixture. It’s not hard to make up, but it’s just another thing to do. I’m glad each mixture lasts a few nights. 
 

6. I like my blue light blocking glasses in the evening. Speaking of which, I should get them now.

 

7. I had enough strength to make myself lunch and dinner. I only eat veggies, grass fed meat, seafood and a bit of fruit, so I cook from scratch.

 

8. I’m grateful for water, love sparkling water especially.

 

9. Made some kale chips yesterday. I was going to make some more today, but then I forgot. Something to look forward to tomorrow. I’ve run out of onion powder, so I’m waiting for some I ordered online that is 100% gluten free and not cross contaminated. I’ll just make the kale chips with salt tomorrow.

 

10. I’ve been too braindead to read my novel, but I’m looking forward to finishing the second novel of The Thursday Murder Mystery club.

 

Well, I think I surprised myself finding ten things to be grateful for today as I’m feeling low.

 

Good evening from Australia💛

[Carmie]

Okie dokie, time for another gratitude list. Here goes:

 

1. It’s around 6pm and it’s pelting down rain. I love the sound of the rain. I’ve also put on a nice evening scenery YouTube video with calm jazz music on my tv. Time to wind down a bit. When you’re in withdrawals you can never really feel totally relaxed, but we do our best, don’t we? 
 

2. There was such a beautiful sunset this evening, it was all golden. Such a delight to see. It’s gone from a golden sky to a rainy sky.

 

3. My sister in law sent me such a lovely message, which brightened my day.

 

4. I’ve been doing some knitting. I knit most days as it’s calming to the nervous system. I’m not making anything in particular, I just find the rhythm of knitting relaxing. I used to do a ton of crochet, but then I got RSI. When it eventually settled I went into knitting, as you don’t move your wrist as much. I made a million crochet blankets and I gave them to friends and a dog shelter.

 

5. I love my new dry skin brush, it’s better than the other one I had. I like the feel of it much better. I try and do dry skin brushing every morning to get the lymphatic system moving.

 

6. I managed to cook myself two meals today. Actually, I still had some food left over from dinner last night, so I had that for lunch. So I didn’t actually have to cook lunch, just heat it up. I don’t eat breakfast, so mornings are easy peasy. I haven’t been eating my first meal until 1pm for a few days, I usually have it around noon or so.

 

7. I think I’m going to make myself a nice cup of lemon and ginger tea soon.

 

8. My cat is looking lovingly at me, or is that hunger I see?😸

 

9. I managed to do a little longer EFT session today to try and shift some stuff, it’s very helpful. I’m going to work on this issue again tomorrow. I’ve been tapping every day, it’s a wonder I don’t have holes in my face☺️
 

10. Got around to reading some paperwork for the company that does my husband’s support coordination. I signed it all, except for one sheet of paper, as I need someone to witness my signature. The support coordinator is very efficient and she’s nice too. So handy to have someone to help you with all the funding and organising the things you need organised. I organise some of the stuff myself, as I have a good relationship with my husband’s carers. They’re all really nice, and extremely helpful. They run errands for me too.
 

Well, there we go. I managed another gratitude list. Time for a cup of tea🫖🍋💛

[Carmie]

Well, another day has elapsed. Time for pondering on things to be grateful for:

 

1. The weather was beautiful, the sun was out and I spent a few hours on my balcony. The temperature was perfect. 
 

2. I’m going to have my dinner soon, I’m a big fan of sweet potatoes. I have them most days, along with other veggies. Sweet potato is my main carb as I don’t eat grains or ordinary potatoes, as they are nightshades. I’ve still got some sweet potatoes left from Friday, when my husband’s carer bought me some veggies. I do get excited about vegetables😁. I’ve got some okra there that I still want to roast. Maybe tomorrow.

 

3. I’m going to have a nice refreshing shower soon.

 

4. I’ve been home all day, so I’m trying to think of other things I’m grateful for. Hmmm🤔I’m grateful for this site. I do disappear here and there due to severe health issues.

 

5. My cat is happy now that she’s had something to eat. I’m happy when she’s contented as she stops annoying me and meowing for food😸. She’s got megaoesophagus and I can’t put a ton of food out for her all at once, as she’ll just vomit it up. She’s on meds. Since she’s been on meds she can eat more in one go then she could before though. She eats sooooo quickly though. 
 

6. I got some more marker pens.

 

7. I’ve been doing some doodling lately. I want to do some more doodling. It’s fun.

 

8. Did my EFT early in the day, which got me off to a good start. Actually, last night I was in the mood for doing some too, so tap, tap, tap. The breathing issues are so severe at times that I’m on the verge of tears a lot, so EFT can help calm me down.

 

9. Spoke to one of my husband’s carers about the new service agreement for the year. Tick. Another thing done. I get external workers from two different companies that take him out and about. I’ve already signed the service agreement of the other one. I’m always happy when paperwork is done. I’m not a fan of mundane paperwork 😄

 

10. Okay, number 10. is going to be the same as number 2. as I’m hungry now. Time for food🍠🧅🐟😋😋

 

💕💕💕

[Emonda]

Love your positivity, @Carmie.

 

You are amazing and a blessing to all on this site.

 

Emonda

[littlebird]

54 minutes ago, Emonda said:

Love your positivity, @Carmie.

 

You are amazing and a blessing to all on this site.

Agreed and seconded! A ray of sunshine.

[Go2zero]

14 hours ago, Emonda said:

You are amazing and a blessing to all on this site.

 

I really love to see you back here @Carmie. 

 

13 hours ago, littlebird said:

Agreed and seconded! A ray of sunshine.

 

Completely agree

 

❤️ 🥰 🙏

[Carmie]

On 4/9/2024 at 3:05 PM, Emonda said:

Love your positivity, @Carmie.

 

You are amazing and a blessing to all on this site.

 

Emonda

 

On 4/9/2024 at 4:00 PM, littlebird said:

Agreed and seconded! A ray of sunshine.

 

10 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

I really love to see you back here @Carmie. 

 

 

Completely agree

 

❤️ 🥰 🙏

Thank you beautiful people for all your heartwarming words, I’m not doing too great health wise, but focusing on things I’m grateful for helps. All your kind words are much appreciated too. Whenever I disappear off this site, know that I’ll be back, I’m just really struggling.

 

I’m not always a ray of sunshine, I shed many tears, mainly because of struggling to breathe so much. It gets so claustrophobic. That being said, it’s time for a gratitude list. My CFS brain fog was too thick yesterday evening, so I couldn’t write one🤪

 

1. I roasted some yummy okra yesterday, and I still have some left, so if I find the strength to make some more for dinner I’ll do so. I cut it into really thin slices to get rid of a lot of the slime. It’s so delicious!!!

 

2. I also made kale chips yesterday, which was yummy. My onion powder hasn’t arrived as yet, so I just made it with salt. Again, yummy!! They are so finicky to make, leave them a little bit too long in the oven, they burn. Don’t cook them enough and they’re chewy and not crunchy. One must get them just right.

 

3. Been reading a bit more of my novel, though due to brain fog I have to keep taking breaks.

 

4. Had the strength to take out the bins early today, so don’t have to worry about rushing at the last moment.

 

5. Catching up with friends on Zoom this evening.

 

6. It’s a glorious, sunny day.

 

7. Did some more doodling, like a big kid👧🏻
 

8. Love sparkling water.

 

9. Had the strength to do my dishes, I just have to dry them. I still had yesterday’s dishes there as I was too weak to do them.

 

10. I made a new liquid formula for my meds last night, so I don’t have to make one tonight. Yay! It lasts a few days.

 

The End😁💛

[Carmie]

Brain fog is bad 🤪, so I can’t write a full gratitude list, but I’m grateful I got to go to the beach today. I went with my husband and his carer, I wore a mask in the car. There’s always a risk of catching something, but I just needed to get out and about.  It’s the first time I’ve been out of my neighbourhood for months🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊💙

[Catina7]

1 hour ago, Carmie said:

I just needed to get out and about.  It’s the first time I’ve been out of my neighbourhood for months

 

I'm so very happy that you were able to do this!  I hope you had a wonderful time.  😍

[Carmie]

On 4/12/2024 at 8:40 PM, Catina7 said:

 

I'm so very happy that you were able to do this!  I hope you had a wonderful time.  😍

Thanks Catina,

 

I got out again today with my husband and his carer. I’m really struggling to breathe though, so it’s hard to enjoy anything. It’s hard to settle. I’m just so very sick.
 

Just taking an hour at a time. I’m getting a new iPad this weekend, it will be easier to look at the screen for me then. At the moment I’m just on a small iPhone.

 

Will write  little gratitude list:

 

1. It was nice to see the river.

 

2. Lovely to chill at open air cafes in the park.

 

3. Got a supplement I needed.

 

4. Received a new dry skin brush in the mail, I like doing my dry skin brushing to move my lymphatics.

 

5. Got some more paperwork over and done with. Have another lot that I’ll send away this weekend, all I need to do is sign it.

 

6. I’m onto my third book in the series I’m reading. I’ve bought the fourth book as well, the fifth book comes out in 2025.

 

7. I’m grateful for my husband’s support workers.

 

8. It was a beautiful sunny day with a perfect temperature.

 

9. I just had a yummy lunch.

 

10. Am chilling lying down, might read some more of my book. Im feeling pretty low as I’m not getting a break from my breathing, so I’m going to escape into a book📖📚

 

💛💛💛

[hayduke]

Sorry to hear you are still having such trouble breathing, @Carmie.  Glad to hear you were able to get outside with your bloke.

 

Hope things ease for you soon.  And that the new ipad is fun.

 

*hugs*

[Carmie]

On 4/19/2024 at 3:47 PM, hayduke said:

Sorry to hear you are still having such trouble breathing, @Carmie.  Glad to hear you were able to get outside with your bloke.

 

Hope things ease for you soon.  And that the new ipad is fun.

 

*hugs*

Hey Hayduke, 

 

How are you doing? Hugs right back at you.

Thanks for your kind words. I’m afraid my breathing issues are lifelong as they are autoimmune. I can’t seem to get a break or go into remission since the vaccine a few years ago. It’s triggered a flare that doesn’t want to end. I’ve shed so many tears this week. I get a tiny bit of reprieve here and there, but not much. 
 

Yes, I got my iPad last weekend, but I didn’t have a clue how to set it up🤪. Today a friend helped me🎉, and seeing I’m so grateful for that I’m going to write a gratitude list:

 

1. Okie dokie, well my friend set up my iPad for me today😁. I think this is called repetition😆I’m so grateful, she’s such a sweetie pie. 
 

2. Not only did she set up my phone, but she also bought me a secondhand iPhone11. I think I’m going up in the world !😜 I had an IPhone7, but it was playing up. Sometimes when I tried to ring out it wouldn’t ring and I had to switch it off and on again for it to ring again. Sometimes I had to do that a few times. Too bad if there’s an emergency. I was going to buy another phone, but then surprise! My friend bought me one. So grateful and feeling spoilt.

 

3. This same friend ordered me some cartridges for my printer at one of those refill places. It’s more economical, though I bought quite a few cartridges so I don’t run out. It all worked well and I printed out some stuff. 
 

4. The other week I caught up with my sister in law in the park around the corner from my place. We had a delightful morning. 
 

5. One of my husband’s carers grabbed a few veggies for me. When I put in my online grocery order for some reason I didn’t get any of the vegetables. I got a refund, so no big deal, but no veggies🥲. I have them now though. Yay! 
 

6. I’m grateful for this iPad, it’s so much easier doing things online. It was really hard to do banking on my teeny tiny phone, or even being on this website. 

 

7. My friend accidentally took home my remote control for my Apple TV, but she rang me and told me how I could use the remote control on my iPad and iPhone to work Apple TV. Wow!! I’m getting very technologically minded here😂. She actually bought me the Apple TV box to use a couple of years ago. I dropped the remote a while back, but it’s still working despite being cracked. 
 

8. I got to go to the beach again last week with my husband and one of his carers. It was so lovely there, I started dancing with my feet in the water. I was listening to music on my phone🌊🌊💃🎶🎶

 

9. Speaking of music, I found a terrific German band I really like last week. Well two actually: AnnenMayKantereit and Giant Rooks. AnnenMayKantereit sing lots of German songs and Giant Rooks sing quite a few English songs. I spoke fluent German growing up, but I kind of lost the language as I don’t speak it anymore with anyone. I was born in Germany. I was amazed though that I still understand quite a bit, especially if people don’t talk too quickly. If they talk too fast, I’m lost. 
 

Anyway, I found these two bands as they were singing Tom’s Diner on YouTube, they had about a hundred and fifty million views. Both of the lead singers of the two bands have amazing voices. Once I start listening to music I go down a rabbit hole. I had the song Ausgehen on repeat  a million times😄. A hyperbole, but you get my drift. 
 

10. I’m grateful I’m slowly getting used to this iPad and it’s almost all set up now. Boy, I needed like a million passwords. I’m trying to get used to the swiping instead of a home button. 
 

Well, I managed another gratitude list. I might do some EFT now. I haven’t done any today yet, and I do it every day. If I don’t do it in the morning or during the day I always do some in the evening. 
 

Hope you’re doing okay💛