Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @RusTW Im ok hanging in there. Trying to focus on the positive ive had some good days Saturday i felt like myself which i havent in 5 months. I was able to go see kevin hart in concert. I wouldnt have been able to do that on the medicine!!!! How r u? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @Hopetobefree how are u feeling? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @Rosetta I agree with you. I definitely believe its our brains not knowing how to deal with it. But its very scary when your brain is telling you something completely different than what your mind wants and believes. It has gotten better. So im praying it continues to do so, how are u? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @bheb hey, thanks for responding to my post. Im really trying not to concern myself with it but its so scary. I did have it when they were upping my dose and on the antipyschotic but since ive been off, i havent had it in 5 weeks. Are u still on any meds? How late did it arrive? Is it any better? Are u able to function? Im just so scared because thats why most people tend to not make it howhow are u doing today 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 4 hours ago, Elyssa143 said: @RusTW Im ok hanging in there. Trying to focus on the positive ive had some good days Saturday i felt like myself which i havent in 5 months. I was able to go see kevin hart in concert. I wouldnt have been able to do that on the medicine!!!! How r u? Seems like your improving if your feeling like yourself.that's great.you mentioned that your getting memories back.another improvement great.We were messed up on them and if we see improvement now were on our way.I had a very clear window last few days.its fading but I won't forget it.The w/d aren't going to get us down.stay positive☺ March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @RusTW your awesome! Thanks for always being there! Its been a week since ive been on the couch. Ive been able to get up and do stuff. Ive been horribly triggered by the suicides on Facebook and im going to close my fb for a while. Definitely getting memories back. Its been probably since before the meds that I had the memories im remembering stuff i didnt remember happened lol. I have also felt like myself for a few days which i havent in 5 months. My fiance had bought kevin hart tickets months back when i was coming off the zyprexa thinking i would be better by now and we hadnt really understood that this was withdrawls. And i was so scared to go. But i did it, i went! And for the first time since this all started I was ok, I felt like myself, i laughed i was able to be distracted and wanted to be out and do fun things. I couldnt have done that on the medicine my anxiety was always bad even on it. Im so scared to state any improvement because i see so many people go backwards. And im terrified of that im terrified of the depression and suicidal thoughts and feelings. Its a horrible feeling to have your brain think something is ok and your mind doesnt. Ive never felt anything like that ever. Ive never been suicidal either. The ideations have also been better for probably two weeks. Since i got off the zyprexa 6 weeks ago things were absolute hell and before that too but the past 6 weeks it seems as if things have gradually very slowly improved. Im really trying to hold on to that and tell myself that everyones story is different and what if i am getting better. I hope your doing ok 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
jonnypeters1234567 Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 great news elyssa 2009-2010 Citalopram 20mg CT no problems Sertaline 2010- 6monnths 2011- 2017 June 2017- Citalopram 20mg CT Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 Believe your healing.You have coping skills that you have and are developing.The new you will so much more enlightened and humbled.This is our path to make of it what we will.The only way is up.Its not easy but we got this.Its ours to grow from.In my windows I'm so much more positive than I ever was.I don't want the old me I want new and improved me. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 The impulsive thinking is the after effect of the zoloft.It will fade.I have it too.I'm still on 50 mgs of zoloft I have a ways to go. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 turn on some music and bust some dance moves and sing a little bit.Music is good for us.it brings back good memories.lol March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @jonnypeters1234567 how are u feeling? U ok? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
jonnypeters1234567 Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 Yeh ok at the moment thanks 2009-2010 Citalopram 20mg CT no problems Sertaline 2010- 6monnths 2011- 2017 June 2017- Citalopram 20mg CT Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @RusTW im trying and I try to believe up is the only way, I do. But after reading all the stories i get so worried so im trying not to and focus on the good. I just cant seem to shake the fear of the depression, i cant be suicidal again that **** was traumatizing. 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @RusTW glad to hear your doing ok! 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 7, 2018 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 @jonnypeters1234567im so glad to hear!!! Do u feel your improving? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
jonnypeters1234567 Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 yes, the days are time is moving fast which is nice 2009-2010 Citalopram 20mg CT no problems Sertaline 2010- 6monnths 2011- 2017 June 2017- Citalopram 20mg CT Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 Don't let yourself have doubts about recovery because when you have your windows you're just going to doubt it and the waves are going to come back with more doubts.so stay positive so when you're in your windows you can absorb it and build your confidence. I was thinking about something yesterday as far as feeling good I kept catching myself trying to think that I wasn't okay so I think a part of recovery is acceptance that we are okay and that we're going to be okay. We have to retrain ourselves. Try to accept what you've gone through as something positive that will make you grow and not let it scare you. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Hopetobefree Posted August 8, 2018 Share Posted August 8, 2018 Hi Elyssa, today is one of the worst days since I stopped Lexapro. Lots of horrible fear mixed with the feeling of impending doom like I'm one step away from a complete breakdown. This wave Ive been in since last Friday is hell. Ive had some moments in between when I think its going away but today's it's really knocked me over to the point where I cancelled my counselling course. I feel like such a failure and life is just never going to get better for me. 😞 But I'm literally holding on every minute for a reprieve at the moment for my girls. I'm worried how I'll cope when I pick the girls up from school because I feel so scared and vulnerable. But it's so nice to hear you've experienced these great windows. Ill hold on to the belief that it can happen to me again. May 2014 - July 2015 0.5 Clonazapam (cold turkey off) October 2014 - November 2014 took Beta Blocker Propranolol (fast taper off) December 2014 - began 2.5mg Lexapro worked up to 30mg Lexapro over 3 months December 2014 - 2 mg Valium started sometimes took up to 6 mg Valium. April 2015 - started 25mg Lamictal worked up to 100mg Lamictal. April 2015 - began taper 4mg Valium. Stopped Valium July 2015 - stopped crumb of 2mg Valium September 2017 began taper 30mg Lexapro. February 2018 last dose Lexapro 1.25mg October 2020 - Began 10% taper of Lamictal Dec 2019. was going ok until tapered from 45mg - 40mg. September 2023 - on the 13th of September 2023 I took my last dose of Lamictal 0.1mg. Finally psych med free!! Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 8, 2018 Author Share Posted August 8, 2018 @Hopetobefree hey I'm so sorry yesterday was such a bad day. I hope today is a better day. I'm holding on to my windows too I'm terrified of the suicidal depression coming back. I was barely hanging on as it was. Your definitely not a failure even though I understand why you would feel that way. Our brains are just injured right now and it takes time. Did you ct the valium? And are u still on lamictal? How are your days usually? Can you cope and function usually? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 8, 2018 Author Share Posted August 8, 2018 @RusTW hey how are you doing today? I'm working on it it's just very hard especially with so many people struggling so far out. I may have to take a break from social media and really work on focusing on myself. I cannot go backwards and it sucks because I'm not sure how much control we really have over that you know? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 8, 2018 Share Posted August 8, 2018 10 minutes ago, Elyssa143 said: @RusTW hey how are you doing today? I'm working on it it's just very hard especially with so many people struggling so far out. I may have to take a break from social media and really work on focusing on myself. I cannot go backwards and it sucks because I'm not sure how much control we really have over that you know? 11 minutes ago, Elyssa143 said: Im ok thanks.littlte anxiety and nausea-each of us is different as far as healing.Hang on to the positives.i would not do social media is extra stress .you cant control it.u have to b creative and be good to yourself. exercise- eat well-.water- sleep- keep goals and reach them even small- a routine-music-motivational videos make due with what u have for now.dont stop living☺️b the eexception- not the causality. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 8, 2018 Share Posted August 8, 2018 I'm glad you read that on JP thread. I was a lot worse when I went through that in my twenties and I am now thank God for that. I was hoping you would read that because some of the stuff you're going through I went through back then. I think the hardest thing about this is that we're trying to figure out how it happened and if it's going to get better. I remember when I was going through this back then I kept trying to figure out what I did to myself and then I realize it was such a waste of time that I couldn't do anything about it anyways. When that set in deep I quit trying to chase it. That's when I got really pissed off and healing started I gave 100% after that point. I have faith that you're going to be fine. Right now we're learning who we are without the medications as they're leaving our body. Try to stop chasing it . obsess on positive things. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 How are you doing? March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 9, 2018 Author Share Posted August 9, 2018 @RusTW I'm back in a wave I literally just wrote down a list of things that had gotten better too. Yesterday I was so physically exhausted and my legs hurt. Today I'm an emotional mess with intrusive thouvhts. I just want a normal life. I feel like I took so much for granted. How are u doing, we do heal right? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 2 minutes ago, Elyssa143 said: @RusTW I'm back in a wave I literally just wrote down a list of things that had gotten better too. Yesterday I was so physically exhausted and my legs hurt. Today I'm an emotional mess with intrusive thouvhts. I just want a normal life. I feel like I took so much for granted. How are u doing, we do heal right? I noticed that when I'm exhausted I get more mental symptoms. It's strange sometimes when I'm tired or exhausted I actually feel better I really do think it gets worse and then it gets better gets a little worse gets a little better. Are you staying busy. I think we're going to have to work through this to feel normal again. It's going to take some work and patience on our part. Nothing's never been easy for me so I guess I'm ahead a little bit. When it does end for us we will have the coping skills to maintain our own happiness without medications or vices. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 how is your diet and your sleep. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 9, 2018 Author Share Posted August 9, 2018 @RusTW I very much agree with you about the coping skills. Which I wouldnt ever have had had it not been from going through this. I am staying as busy as possible. I had a good 5 days I'm so greatful for that. Today I've sat outside and done some laundry. Really trying to take it easy. I'm trying not to be too upset with the fact that I'm really only 6 weeks off any meds and it's already been such hell for me. But another part of me tries to reason that maybe the zyprexa taper helped some way by slowing down the serotonin some how? I dk ifs very hard to remember the good in a wave. But I'm trying. 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 9, 2018 Author Share Posted August 9, 2018 @RusTW my sleep has improved before the zyprexa 1-2 hours and after the zyprexa went a few days with no sleep then a few weeks 1-2 now I sleep 4.5-6 straight and maybe an hour or so after. My diet, no dairy, sugar, gluten, may, artificial sweetners, grains, caffine. Mostly fruits and veggies minimal meat and eggs 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 5 good days and 6 weeks out is fantastic. 8 days was my longest window so far. When the waves came in they were strong though and continuous. Does your symptoms come and go throughout the day March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 9, 2018 Author Share Posted August 9, 2018 @RusTW how is it fantastic? I'm just so scared that I've been in hell for 5 months and I'm just in the beginning of my withdrawl. I've been off zoloft 4 months. Now they seem to kind of come and go? The waves havent been as deep and dark but their still hell. How long do ur waves last? 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 I was reading somewhere that as a healing is happening it happens randomly in different areas of our body so you'll feel worse in one area and then you'll feel worse in another area March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 9, 2018 Author Share Posted August 9, 2018 @RusTW most of mine is mental :(. But I do have brain fog, tinnitus, back pain, leg pain. Blurry eyes. Hopefully we are healing 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 1 minute ago, Elyssa143 said: @RusTW how is it fantastic? I'm just so scared that I've been in hell for 5 months and I'm just in the beginning of my withdrawl. I've been off zoloft 4 months. Now they seem to kind of come and go? The waves havent been as deep and dark but their still hell. How long do ur waves last? March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 Just now, RusTW said: 3 minutes ago, Elyssa143 said: @RusTW how is it fantastic? I'm just so scared that I've been in hell for 5 months and I'm just in the beginning of my withdrawl. I've been off zoloft 4 months. Now they seem to kind of come and go? The waves havent been as deep and dark but their still hell. How long do ur waves last? you're off your medication -positive- you're having Windows already- positive I think a lot of damage is done while you're on the medications. I can feel both of mine when I have to take them everyday. You're already ahead of me you're off of them March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
RusTW Posted August 9, 2018 Share Posted August 9, 2018 8 minutes ago, Elyssa143 said: @RusTW most of mine is mental :(. But I do have brain fog, tinnitus, back pain, leg pain. Blurry eyes. Hopefully we are healing I get all of those too. Your sleep has improved and your diets on point so good job. I've yet to read a success story when they said they woke up the next day and it was completely gone. That would be nice but that's too easy. I always had a pretty good connection with the mind-body I was always in good shape. Something happen though when I started taking the antidepressant and the Zyprexa. When I started taking Zyprexa I was 30 pounds underweight from the Cipro ordeal. I immediately gained 30 lbs back and put 30 more pounds on so a total of 60 lb of weight gain from the time I took it. During that period of time I had extremely high levels of estrogen floating in my blood which is not good because you get anxiety and depression from that as a male. Zyprexa lowers your testosterone and raises estrogen. So this crap messes with your endocrine system I think that's why there's so many sexual dysfunction reports. Everything has to return to homeostasis. March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia. August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only. Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/ Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2 ativan 1mg a month as needed if that. Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin Link to comment
Elyssa143 Posted August 9, 2018 Author Share Posted August 9, 2018 @RusTW thanj uou for pointing that out it's hard to see the positive sometimes. Atleast your tapering the right way thank god so hopefully youll be ok when you come off!!! 13 months on 25 mg of sertraline. Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018 Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018 Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash) Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks. 21 months off sertraline 19 months off zyprexa 22 months into withdrawl Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now