Neeta: Hi

[Altostrata]

Welcome, @Neeta

 

Thank you for joining our community. Yes, withdrawal syndrome can be very frightening.

 

How did you feel after you reinstated 10mg Prozac?

 

Many people find fish oil and magnesium supplements helpful, see

 

https://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/

 

https://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

 

You might try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you. Please let us know how you’re doing.

[Neeta]

Hi, I'm on day 4 of the 10 mg.  It's almost feels like pre meds or too fast a WD:  anxiety, intense intrusive thoughts/OCD, fear, crying spells, suicidal thoughts and all the other emotional/mental symptoms. 

Physical ones "sound" more bearable!  though know they are hell too.  What has been different and "interesting" is to get flashes, understandings (I hope) of how I linked up early childhood trauma

with OCD -- to feel the anxiety and all the rest of the "aforementioned" symptoms, and see how my mind/brain comes in to solve? rescue? away those intense feelings, to translate them?

turn them into "thoughts"/spells/rituals all the components of OCD.  Does this make any sense?  If prozac takes 2 - 6 weeks to "kick in", so the reinstatement on a higher dose?  This is all too familiar 

territory.  What "scares" me is being worn down after not sleeping for a year, and surviving all of this!

On the suggested supplements:  will trying increasing my fish oil.  Already "maxed" out on magnesius -- any more causes diarrhea.

Thank you so much again for answering and for this forum.  It has help save so many lives....

[Altostrata]

5 hours ago, Neeta said:

It's almost feels like pre meds or too fast a WD:  anxiety, intense intrusive thoughts/OCD, fear, crying spells, suicidal thoughts and all the other emotional/mental symptoms. 

 

Are these new symptoms since you started taking 10mg Prozac this time around?

[Neeta]

They were current during my last 4 months of titrating off of the Prozac, and then increasingly so the past 3 weeks to the point where I could no longer tolerate them....

I am wondering, if there are people with early life "trauma" that has been addressed every which way that finally opt for low doses of meds to live a "more full life"?

No doubt a very personal choice....

[Altostrata]

4 hours ago, Neeta said:

I am wondering, if there are people with early life "trauma" that has been addressed every which way that finally opt for low doses of meds to live a "more full life"?

 

We cannot answer that question. Among the 10s of millions taking psychiatric drugs, there probably are some doing that.

 

What time o'clock do you take your drugs, with their dosages? Do you feel better or worse after you take each dose, compared to how you feel before taking any?

[Neeta]

Yes, I understand no one can make that decision or know but oneself how to heal from trauma.  Am looking at homeopathy for support in that area....

 

I take one 10 mg prozac usually around 11 am.  Within 2 - 4 hours, there can be a lessening of symptoms.  At present, on an every other day of particularly

tough days and then an easier one.  

[Altostrata]

I merged your new topic with your existing one. Only one Introductions topic to a member.

 

1 hour ago, Neeta said:

Within 2 - 4 hours, there can be a lessening of symptoms. 

 

What you mean is a lessening of the withdrawal symptoms you got when you decreased to 6.5mg? When did you do that?

 

Please update your signature with your recent drug changes.

[Shep]

On 2/5/2023 at 4:25 PM, Neeta said:

I take one 10 mg prozac usually around 11 am.  Within 2 - 4 hours, there can be a lessening of symptoms.

 

You have 7.1 mg of Valium in your signature for 2022. Are you still taking Valium? If so, how much are you currently taking and at one time of the day do you take it? 

 

Once you update your signature, we'll be able to give you more advice. 

[Neeta]

Hi sorry that wasn't very clear....as of 7.1.2002 (fixed the signature)  I was finished titrating off of the valium (previously klonopin).  Had been off that only a month or two before started titrating

off of the prozac....dumb in retrospect....as mentioned I was still not sleeping (literally not) and had anxiety.  Hope this helps clarify the titration.  Thanks so much for asking.....

[Altostrata]

When did you go off Prozac? When did withdrawal symptoms start? When did you reinstate 10mg Prozac? How long have you been taking it this time around?

 

Please update your signature, because we have no idea from it what has happened since July 2022.

 

On 2/1/2023 at 3:07 PM, Neeta said:

Hi.  I went back on 10 mg of prozac this past Monday -- from 6.5 mg.

 

Apparently, you tapered down to 6.5mg and got withdrawal symptoms? How did you get from 10mg to 6.5mg since September 2022?

 

 

[Neeta]

Apologies again...just edited the signature.  As said in Yiddish, am very "famished"!  Am a bit confused as to the accuracy of the July - September taper of prozac from 15 to 10 mg.  I thought I had done that 5 mg reduction much earlier.... If I did do this starting in July, in hopes of getting to the finish line sooner, and to the "compounded" lower dosages, jeez did I "goof".  I have always pushed, and pushed....to unhealthy points.  I was still reading the benzo blog and had not reaquainted myself well enough with this site....only myself to "blame".....

Dang!  Thank you for asking, and for all of your time and help....it feel very strange to feel so fragile again, with no difference between day and night, between me and the world....but others have been here too?

[littlebird]

On 2/4/2023 at 2:20 PM, Neeta said:

I am wondering, if there are people with early life "trauma" that has been addressed every which way that finally opt for low doses of meds to live a "more full life"?

 

I've been wondering this too, and I'm sure it will vary from person to person. I have a lot of developmental trauma, and have wondered if it'll be possible to get off meds (or if doctors are right and I'll need them for life). As I continue the med journey, I see hopeful signs that I may be able to one day leave them behind. They were never a fix, after all, nor did they ever help that much, more like band-aids on trauma that needed deeper work. 

 

Only one way to find out, and that's to carefully experiment over a long period of time and see how we feel! Glad you're here, hope you keep us all updated on how you do.

[Neeta]

 

 

Hi Littlebird,  thanks so much for sharing.  Yeah, the dang "band aid" effect.  I too, when I first began to serioulsy taper down 12 years ago was still taken aback to find all of the old "stuff" was still there, even though I knew it would be....and hoped it wasn't!  You've no doubt done your own "homework" as to what aspects of healing your trauma will help.  I did several years of Somatic Experiencing -- Peter Levine's school of healing -- it was helpful.  Am looking to go deeper, to the "core" if I can.  Presently looking for an EMDR therapist, and a homepathic practioner.   $$ becomes problematic.....That you are wise and doing "careful experimentation"  -- that's terrific!  That there is this community is a blessing.  How many lives have been saved here?  Please stay in touch.  My husband says, "Each person's hell is hell,"  which sums up all of our shared journeys?!

[littlebird]

13 minutes ago, Neeta said:

I did several years of Somatic Experiencing -- Peter Levine's school of healing -- it was helpful.

 

Oh, I've always wanted to try that! Last I checked, it wasn't covered by insurance and was only available out of pocket. Right there with you with money being an issue in trauma recovery.

 

19 minutes ago, Neeta said:

Presently looking for an EMDR therapist, and a homepathic practioner.   $$ becomes problematic

 

I've gotten really lucky with some sliding scale EMDR with a graduate student who was very good at a local trauma center. It can be really intense with developmental trauma, I had to take time off work while I did EMDR. I lost so much time, disassociated walking for miles and miles after each appointment, felt like it had been 10 minutes and hours had passed! Wild.

 

It helped a lot, but was massively disruptive due to the developmental trauma connected to the adult trauma I was going there for. I lost a lot of my life to disassociation at that time! Which was probably good, and just what I needed. I took more naps while doing EMDR than any other part of my life, I think my brain was doing some serious rewiring.

 

This site is amazing! I'm sure countless lives have been saved by the information here. They've made my life immeasurably better, and I just got to the taper portion of things. My doctors had me taking a lot of interacting meds! 

[Neeta]

Wow.  What horrendous experiences you have had!  Do you feel like the EMDR work helped to actually "heal" the early developmental difficulty?

And the exhaustion, walking and all else was part of that healing?  As if?  Giving the brain and whatever other parts needed the time to

put themselves back together?  At this point, I would almost welcome an amnesia about this time in my life! 

 

Congratulations on being at the taper phase and through the cocktails.  When I was on mine, it last over a year or more.  When I started

shaking and spasming uncontrollably I stopped almost everything except for the klonopin and prozac -- as I remember.  That is a lost

period mostly.  I was under the care of a well known UCLA OCD Psychiatrist (took Medicare) who just kept adding more and more meds.

 

It took me almost 6 months to find a Somatic Therapist who took Medicare.  Most of these "adjuct" therapies are prohibitive!

Am back to looking for Medicare providers which is tedious and time consuming.

[littlebird]

35 minutes ago, Neeta said:

Wow.  What horrendous experiences you have had!  Do you feel like the EMDR work helped to actually "heal" the early developmental difficulty?

 

Interesting question. Hmm... I think the trauma that happened as an adult activated a lot of childhood stuff, and brought up cPTSD symptoms much closer to the surface: I started having flashbacks when triggered. I'd say EMDR helped disconnect the parts of my brain that were experiencing flashbacks from the childhood stuff, and with time and processing and lots of EMDR those flashbacks stopped happening.

 

So, it disconnected the early developmental stuff from my adult experience, without making it go away. I no longer had debilitating flashbacks, but I still had a LOT of trauma-work to do on what came up. I'm still working on it.

 

EMDR brought up a lot. You know how you can remember something, then a detail you haven't thought about comes to the surface painfully? Not quite a repressed memory, but maybe partially repressed. Who knows, I was a hot mess at that time, plus super disassociated, and my doctors just kept throwing more pills at the problem. I started doing acupuncture at that time, and it helped in very profound ways with the cPTSD and related physical/emotional/mental symptoms. Total godsend for me.

 

41 minutes ago, Neeta said:

That is a lost

period mostly.  I was under the care of a well known UCLA OCD Psychiatrist (took Medicare) who just kept adding more and more meds.

 

You get it! The lost time, and the doctors throwing more and more meds at the problem. There was a time I was on so much Gabapentin I couldn't walk; I was so dizzy I fell down often, had to lean on things to walk, and had to take time off work. Doctors said it would "even out, keep taking it, and here, try this blood pressure med that reduces nightmares, that'll make your blood pressure lower and make you even more dizzy." Doctors can make some questionable choices. I've found better medical advice (I know, not legally medical advice, peer support) on here than from any doctor I've ever talked to about meds.

 

44 minutes ago, Neeta said:

It took me almost 6 months to find a Somatic Therapist who took Medicare.  Most of these "adjuct" therapies are prohibitive!

Am back to looking for Medicare providers which is tedious and time consuming.

 

SO cost prohibitive! Makes me wonder how much my life would change, and how fast it I could potentially heal, if I could access the proven trauma therapies available. Plus, having more access to other therapies that I've found helpful, like acupuncture, massage, yoga classes. Those things would help, and I just can't afford 'em right now. I could do yoga youtube stuff at home, and probably should.

 

I met someone in a support group once who had well-off parents with top-notch insurance, and they were getting sent to a spa-like residential trauma-care facility that specialized in horse therapy: they were going to ride horses and go to trauma-informed therapy all day. At the time, I was fighting my insurance for basic therapy, and wanted to scream in wealth inequality. I'm pretty sure I managed to say something kind and supportive while internally screaming.

 

All this to say, right there with you. It's hard to think about that stuff, so I've been taking a cue from a member on here who does gratitude lists, and trying to think about things I do have. I have insurance! There was a time just being insured was a struggle, so I'm already making progress. I found this site! I thought I was gonna die on these meds before learning how to safely taper. Life is all right, and looking to get better.

[Altostrata]

@Neeta how do you feel, now that you've been taking 10mg Prozac for a week?

[Neeta]

Slightly improved.  Still hellish. Back to up most of nite. Fear anxiety crescendoing.  De realization, de personalization and intrusive thoughts non stop.  A big ugh. Trying to hang in there and hoping extra amount of Prozac will kick in soon.

[Altostrata]

How has your symptom pattern improved? How do you feel after you take Prozac compared to how you feel before you take your dose?

[Thorin]

On 2/5/2023 at 9:20 AM, Neeta said:

They were current during my last 4 months of titrating off of the Prozac, and then increasingly so the past 3 weeks to the point where I could no longer tolerate them....

I am wondering, if there are people with early life "trauma" that has been addressed every which way that finally opt for low doses of meds to live a "more full life"?

No doubt a very personal choice....

I have a significant amount of trauma in my history and have been taking meds from the age of 16-43 (tapering the last two years though). I can honestly say that meds have not helped my trauma in anyway. Taking the meds made me numb (which I guess helped but I no way to live). Now that I’m tapering I have to deal with all the suppressed trauma. It’s a very personal choice but I can’t imagine I will ever medicate for trauma again. I’ve made more progress in the last 12 months doing good therapy than I did in the previous 40 years. That’s my experience.

[littlebird]

19 minutes ago, Thorin said:

Taking the meds made me numb (which I guess helped but I no way to live). Now that I’m tapering I have to deal with all the suppressed trauma. It’s a very personal choice but I can’t imagine I will ever medicate for trauma again. I’ve made more progress in the last 12 months doing good therapy than I did in the previous 40 years.

 

Co-signing this!! I always wondered why my depression and anxiety were so "treatment resistant," now I know because I really needed treatment for developmental trauma, not medication for it. 

 

As rough as it feels sometimes to have this suppressed/numbed stuff come to the surface, I also feel like I'm making serious ground in recovery in a very real way. I'm able to be in touch with things, and process, in a way that being zombified on meds made almost impossible at times.

[Thorin]

30 minutes ago, littlebird said:

Co-signing this!! I always wondered why my depression and anxiety were so "treatment resistant," now I know because I really needed treatment for developmental trauma, not medication for it. 

 

As rough as it feels sometimes to have this suppressed/numbed stuff come to the surface, I also feel like I'm making serious ground in recovery in a very real way. I'm able to be in touch with things, and process, in a way that being zombified on meds made almost impossible at times.

Exactly. We weren’t treating the cause, we were trying to mask the symptoms and that didn’t work! I’m glad you’re making headway too. Feels like many people are on this journey at the moment.

[Neeta]

Hi, really good and interesting to hear from others about trauma and medication -- seems we have all had similar experiences -- deferring the pain and chaos which has waited with us the whole time to be seen and felt.  The numbing was basically a "temporary reprieve" at best.  I remember doing "work", and thinking? feeling? I was understanding that darkness, or seeing threads of the trauma  -- but I never FELT my way through it.  Impossible.  I also didn't even know about "trauma" till a few years ago -- which is astounding to me.  No one, no therapist or other "professional" ever talked about it, or used that word to describe my past, or any one else's -- my family is riddled with it.  All to say, that as terrifying and horrendous as many days are now, am hoping to truly heal as much as possible. 

Sound familiar?

[Thorin]

36 minutes ago, Neeta said:

Hi, really good and interesting to hear from others about trauma and medication -- seems we have all had similar experiences -- deferring the pain and chaos which has waited with us the whole time to be seen and felt.  The numbing was basically a "temporary reprieve" at best.  I remember doing "work", and thinking? feeling? I was understanding that darkness, or seeing threads of the trauma  -- but I never FELT my way through it.  Impossible.  I also didn't even know about "trauma" till a few years ago -- which is astounding to me.  No one, no therapist or other "professional" ever talked about it, or used that word to describe my past, or any one else's -- my family is riddled with it.  All to say, that as terrifying and horrendous as many days are now, am hoping to truly heal as much as possible. 

Sound familiar?

Perfectly familiar. Generations of trauma in my family. It’s horrific. At 16 when I left the traumatic environment I had been trapped in I fell to pieces. No one mentioned trauma or anything like that. They told me I had a chemical imbalance and needed medication. Seems like a complete farce now when I look back. It’s SO obvious it was the trauma. These people that diagnosed us and medicated us were fools.

[littlebird]

40 minutes ago, Neeta said:

Sound familiar?

 

Big time!! I also came late in life to the cPTSD diagnosis. My whole life, it had been "treatment-resistant depression and anxiety" with an occasional "bipolar with hypomania" opinion that never felt like it fit. I would love some mania, but hearing about what that sounds like, even quick hypomania, never seemed right.

 

The first time a doctor told me, "You have complex PTSD," it blew my mind, and also it felt completely right in my gut. Reading through the symptoms, it became abundantly clear I'd been misdiagnosed my whole life. Unfortunately, that doctor hit me with a cocktail of way too much Gabapentin, Zoloft, and some other pills I can't even remember at this time. She was right about diagnosis, if not treatment.

 

43 minutes ago, Neeta said:

my family is riddled with it

 

Sounds like you're the one who sees the cycle and chooses to break it! Not an easy position to be in, but ultimately so much better than continuing it and passing more trauma down as a family legacy.

 

5 minutes ago, Thorin said:

Generations of trauma in my family. It’s horrific. At 16 when I left the traumatic environment I had been trapped in I fell to pieces. No one mentioned trauma or anything like that. They told me I had a chemical imbalance and needed medication.

 

Same. I was hit with meds as a young teen, including a terrible hospitalization, and my final year of high school, my doctor tried to convince my parents to keep me at home for further treatment and not go away to college. I fought that tooth and nail, and luckily was able to move out and go to school.

 

Staying in that traumatic environment would have poisoned me further, I thank god all the time that I escaped. Had to move back in when I was student teaching as a college senior, and it was one of the hardest times of my life. I escaped shortly after to California and put half a country between me and my home of origin!

 

7 minutes ago, Thorin said:

Seems like a complete farce now when I look back. It’s SO obvious it was the trauma. These people that diagnosed us and medicated us were fools.

 

Right there with you! Sometimes I have a little compassion, "It's hard to see the signs of abuse, and people are biased to think teenagers are the problem," but these doctors messed my life up so badly I'm mostly just angry at them and every single system that ever failed us.

 

I will say this: the people I find most nuanced and fascinating, and my favorite people on this earth, had really rough starts. I used to think it was because I couldn't relate to people who didn't struggle, but also I find that those of us who experienced great pain also have great big hearts and care about others to a very deep extent. 

 

While I have met people whose early trauma made them continue cycles of harm, I have met more people who have decided to never hurt others they way they were hurt. There's an ancient Sufi poet I love, who was sold into slavery at a young age, and in later life became an acclaimed writer and mystic who spoke on this:

 

"A school I sat in cured me of hurting others," Rabia al'Basri (b. 801 CE)

[Thorin]

6 hours ago, littlebird said:

Same. I was hit with meds as a young teen, including a terrible hospitalization, and my final year of high school, my doctor tried to convince my parents to keep me at home for further treatment and not go away to college. I fought that tooth and nail, and luckily was able to move out and go to school.

I’m very glad you were able to get away. I was mostly out of the house at 16 and completely out at 17. Best thing I ever did was leave my family behind. Made the mistake of letting them back in later down the track. Mum’s passed away now and I keep my distance from my father. It’s better this way.

 

6 hours ago, littlebird said:

life. I escaped shortly after to California and put half a country between me and my home of origin!

I ended up leaving the country for a long time. And while I was gone my mother moved to Colorado from Australia so eventually I went for a visit and that was my first introduction to the U.S.A. Went back years later after she died. Back to Colorado and then travelled around a fair bit. Will get back there one day.

 

6 hours ago, littlebird said:

Right there with you! Sometimes I have a little compassion, "It's hard to see the signs of abuse, and people are biased to think teenagers are the problem," but these doctors messed my life up so badly I'm mostly just angry at them and every single system that ever failed us.

I’ve had doctors completely change the subject when I talked about my upbringing. Then out came the pills. Gonna stop talking about it now. At least we’re on the right path now.

 

6 hours ago, littlebird said:

will say this: the people I find most nuanced and fascinating, and my favorite people on this earth, had really rough starts. I used to think it was because I couldn't relate to people who didn't struggle, but also I find that those of us who experienced great pain also have great big hearts and care about others to a very deep extent.

Couldn’t agree more. People who have ‘seen some stuff’ tend to be more authentic in general. That’s the person I get on with the most. I struggle with vapid, surface level chit chat.

 

6 hours ago, littlebird said:

While I have met people whose early trauma made them continue cycles of harm, I have met more people who have decided to never hurt others they way they were hurt. There's an ancient Sufi poet I love, who was sold into slavery at a young age, and in later life became an acclaimed writer and mystic who spoke on this:

 

"A school I sat in cured me of hurting others," Rabia al'Basri (b. 801 CE)

Amazing. Somehow I broke the cycle of abuse (against all odds, the other kids in my house didn’t do as well). My uncle did the same as me. It requires taking a good hard look deep inside yourself because when you grew up in **** your automatic response can be **** too. It takes a lot of hard work to replace **** with love, kindness and support. I even get intrusive thoughts of hurting the ones I love sometimes (WD makes this terrible) so I truly believed I was terrible until I learned that intrusive thoughts are often a trauma wound. For the record I’ve never hurt anyone I love nor would I. 

[Neeta]

Hi will answer both in a "collective" response.  This conversation is precious -- and rare -- and hopefully of benefit to others.  How many of us were put on meds because of "trauma" -- and

what we did not understand that to be?  I sure was.  I knew I had a "troubled" back ground and when I had my son, instictively wanted to "break the cycle", though could not put any words to

it beyond that.  Difficult birth and aftermath, crashed with full blown CFIDS (Chronic Fatigue Immunne Disorder) and a variety of other "illnesses" -- the mental/emotional seemed the

hardest!  And led to the meds.  Body and mind both searching for "outlets" for trauma exacerbated?  Probably doesn't matter.  No other "solutions" were offered, or seemed available.  Oh

how desperation also figures in -- I was willing to try the pills.  1990 not much talked about.  No internet.   I curse myself mostly, for the years of lost life and living.  I did, felt

"better" at times for those first 7 years while the meds "worked".  But then they stopped.  And I tried to stop them -- cold turkey.  And then the tail spinning whlrlwinds of more drugs, more confusion,

trying to stabilize from all the med changes.  In and out of hell.  In the times I tried to titrate --which were numerous -- I didn't know what the heck I was doing (this site was not yet).  The docs (alternative/traditional) I worked with didn't either as it turned out.  They went way too fast and believed all of the support supplements would compensate this formidably bumpy ride.  Those titrations always crashed too.  In retrospect, how can a humble weed, herb or mineral compensate for the years of an altered CNS from POWERFUL meds?  For me, they couldn't.  So back in one of these

hellish periods:  each day, hour, minute full of terror.  It is very familiar -- and never gets easier!  Only "solution" seems clear now:  to deeply plunge into the "trauma" and heal it.

[Neeta]

Hi.  Update. Unexpectedly totally bottomed out. Talked with 2 different psychiatrists.  Both say up on Prozac.  For second med, one says Lamictal. The other seroquel.  Any ideas which will be easier to taper off of and with least side effects? Thanks so much.

[Altostrata]

@Neeta you should ask the psychiatrists about this. We offer peer support for going off psychiatric drugs, not unpaid advice for how to mix a new drug cocktail, that's what you pay your doctors for.

 

If you don't trust the psychiatrists to know the answers to your questions, that should tell you something about your decisions.

 

Please let us know when you want advice about going off drugs.

[Neeta]

You are so right. Apologies.   An the post be removed?

 

[Neeta]

PS  Did not think it would hurt to ask.  

[Carmie]

Hi @Neeta

 

I’m sorry you’re struggling so much, my heart goes out to you. Having had trauma can certainly affect everything in your life, making it hard to cope from day to day. 
 

It’s up to you if you want to use more meds, they are decisions you need to make. I just wanted to say that I’m on Seroquel and I’ve been tapering it for many, many years and have got many more to go. I can only taper in such small amounts because if I taper any quicker the withdrawals get so severe and I could end up with Akathisia too, which has been the most horrific experience in my entire life.

 

Wish you all the best💛

[Neeta]

Hi Carmie.  Your struggle with tapering off of Seroquel sounds, is horrendous.  I am so sorry to hear that.

I'm aware that each of us can only choose what to do.  Thanks you so much for candidly sharing your experience.  You, and others here,

are very brave.  Best wishes to you too.... 

[Carmie]

4 minutes ago, Neeta said:

Hi Carmie.  Your struggle with tapering off of Seroquel sounds, is horrendous.  I am so sorry to hear that.

I'm aware that each of us can only choose what to do.  Thanks you so much for candidly sharing your experience.  You, and others here,

are very brave.  Best wishes to you too.... 

Thanks Neeta, 

 

You are brave too. I think we all are on this site, it certainly takes a lot of patience to deal with all we are dealing with. I just thought I’d tell you about my experience with Seroquel because you mentioned you were thinking of whether to go on it. I have been put on and off so many medications that my brain is now so sensitised that any little change affects me so badly. The more we go on and off meds the harder it becomes to taper them. Seroquel is what is causing me grief now, as I mentioned. 
 

It doesn’t matter which psych meds we go on, they can all cause severe withdrawals in different people. If you look at different threads on this site, you’ll see people have been struggling to get off pretty much any one of the psych meds. 
 

Sending hugs🤗

[Altostrata]

Doesn't hurt to ask. The answer is that when you are considering increasing your drug burden, we do not provide unpaid backup advice to well-paid professionals, who should be able to answer your questions. Period.

 

As it seems, @Neeta, that you have decided to seek professional assistance at this juncture, I won't even go through the usual time-consuming discussion of whether your symptoms might be related to withdrawal. If you believe that strongly that the answer for you is drug treatment, it doesn't matter anyway.

[Neeta]

Hi Alostrata.  This is a strange predicament.  I have not worked with any psychiatrists for over 15 years.  The meds I took were prescribed by family/holistic doctors who I have been working with to taper off of the meds.  After all of this time (30 plus years) and experiences with drugs and psychs, I don't trust any of them.  To find myself so completely bottomed out, and in such hell again, was totally unexpected. 

 

To say, that those who are tapering are tough, me too, is probably a gross understatement!  My quandary of looking for "help"  recently is that deep distrust of psychs, but how to get through another day in one piece with/without some kind of professional advice.  My regular docs are at a loss, and all have said see a psych.  Yes, the impulse to end life was unlike any I've ever felt before -- as if I might act on it which had NEVER happened previously.  I would love to have the whatever to be a purist, idealist about meds at this moment.  Really.  I hear many shaming voices from many people.  You too?  I ask, and not as a challenge,  what does one do when life becomes unbearable, when one can no longer stay in one piece mentally?  

 

I have personally taken  many of the "alternative"  supplements -- which can never touch the "power" of the meds unfortunately, especially after the fact of having

been on them for any length of time.  The other part of this -- not related to tapering -- is unresolved trama.  As I understand that will take time.  If that is the demon presently showing  up, it is a darkness that can't just be willed away. 

 

Each of our journeys is so unique.  I hope this explains mine a bit more.  Again, I appreciate your dedication, honesty and forthrightness  -- which may seem harsh. Again, what would you do if you were in my "place" at this time?  What alternatives to medication do you suggest? This is NOT a challenge but a genuine question.  Thank you.