Thorin Posted January 10 Author Share Posted January 10 I guess I should add that I think the anxiety and depersonalisation is messing with me a bit. I keep observing my own behaviour and getting anxious about it. Kinda like having a mini identity crisis I imagine but likely fueled by receptors and stuff being out of wack. Not sure how to act. It’s like being a teenager again. Not loving it…… anyway, just keep plodding along I guess. Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Mentor littlebird Posted January 10 Mentor Share Posted January 10 1 hour ago, Thorin said: I guess I should add that I think the anxiety and depersonalisation is messing with me a bit. I keep observing my own behaviour and getting anxious about it. Me tooooooooo 1 hour ago, Thorin said: It’s like being a teenager again. Not loving it We started this mess when we were teenagers, makes sense that getting off of them would send us back to the developmental age we were when the drugs began. It sucks. 😎 Maybe we're processing the stuff we needed to then, but were too drugged up to, and it'll pass and we'll be in our 20s soon. Pronouns: they/them/theirs Started on Prozac in early 2000s to treat cPTSD, been on various cocktails ever since. 2002-2004, 2017-2022: Buspar, tapered down to 0 2016-present: 100mg Seroquel for sleep -> May 2023: 90mg -> June 2023: 81mg -> September 2023: 72mg -> switched to brand name, much too strong, down to 60mg -> October 2023: 54mg -> November 2023: 50mg -> January 2024: 45mg -> April 2024: 40.5mg 2016-Present: 100mg Wellbutrin SR -> January 2023: 75mg IR (37.5mg 2x a day) -> February 2023 (33.75mg 2x a day) -> July 2023 (30.37mg 2x a day) -> August 2023: 27.33mg 2x a day 2018-present: 25mg Pristiq 2015-present: 600mg Gabapentin (200mg 3x a day) -> December 2022: 300mg Gabapentin (100mg 3x a day) per GP's recommendation after side effects -> March 2023: 90mg 3x a day (switched to liquid suspension) -> April 2023: 81mg 3x a day -> September 2023: bad generic, switched back to homemade liquid; too strong after bad generic, down to 70mg 3x a day, still bad. Adjusted slowly till at 60mg 3x a day, much better. Long hold till -> December 2023: 54mg, still feels too high after November Seroquel switch from brand name to generic, doc recommended 50mg which feels better -> January 2024: When Wellbutrin went down, Gabapentin started putting me to sleep, went down to 45mg, then 41mg to stay awake, so far so good -> February 2024: 36mg, still too high, 34mg -> March 2024: 31mg, STILL too high, 30mg Supplements: Multivitamin w/magnesium, probiotics, digestive enzymes, anti-viral nitric oxide nose spray as needed Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 10 Author Share Posted January 10 50 minutes ago, littlebird said: Me tooooooooo You’re doing this too? It’s the worst LB. Sorry you’re experiencing this! 51 minutes ago, littlebird said: We started this mess when we were teenagers, makes sense that getting off of them would send us back to the developmental age we were when the drugs began. It sucks. 😎 Maybe we're processing the stuff we needed to then, but were too drugged up to, and it'll pass and we'll be in our 20s soon. Man my 20s were pretty awesome! Maybe got difficult towards the end. I’m keen for 20s again though. Particularly 21-27/28. How were your 20s? Just realised I don’t even know how old you are. No need to post it. Just interesting that we’ve been chatting for a while and there’s still so much anonymity. I do it too. Not sure why. hang on. 24 was difficult and also when I started benzos. I’d like to skip that year please. Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Mentor littlebird Posted January 10 Mentor Share Posted January 10 I'd be willing to skip the majority of my 20s tbh! 🤣 Or fast forward through them and only pause at the fun stuff. If it was just fun stuff like warehouse raves coming back it'd be a dream, but the feelings - ooh, not the most fun time traveling. 1 Pronouns: they/them/theirs Started on Prozac in early 2000s to treat cPTSD, been on various cocktails ever since. 2002-2004, 2017-2022: Buspar, tapered down to 0 2016-present: 100mg Seroquel for sleep -> May 2023: 90mg -> June 2023: 81mg -> September 2023: 72mg -> switched to brand name, much too strong, down to 60mg -> October 2023: 54mg -> November 2023: 50mg -> January 2024: 45mg -> April 2024: 40.5mg 2016-Present: 100mg Wellbutrin SR -> January 2023: 75mg IR (37.5mg 2x a day) -> February 2023 (33.75mg 2x a day) -> July 2023 (30.37mg 2x a day) -> August 2023: 27.33mg 2x a day 2018-present: 25mg Pristiq 2015-present: 600mg Gabapentin (200mg 3x a day) -> December 2022: 300mg Gabapentin (100mg 3x a day) per GP's recommendation after side effects -> March 2023: 90mg 3x a day (switched to liquid suspension) -> April 2023: 81mg 3x a day -> September 2023: bad generic, switched back to homemade liquid; too strong after bad generic, down to 70mg 3x a day, still bad. Adjusted slowly till at 60mg 3x a day, much better. Long hold till -> December 2023: 54mg, still feels too high after November Seroquel switch from brand name to generic, doc recommended 50mg which feels better -> January 2024: When Wellbutrin went down, Gabapentin started putting me to sleep, went down to 45mg, then 41mg to stay awake, so far so good -> February 2024: 36mg, still too high, 34mg -> March 2024: 31mg, STILL too high, 30mg Supplements: Multivitamin w/magnesium, probiotics, digestive enzymes, anti-viral nitric oxide nose spray as needed Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus hayduke Posted January 11 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 11 22 hours ago, littlebird said: We started this mess when we were teenagers, makes sense that getting off of them would send us back to the developmental age we were when the drugs began. It sucks. 😎 Maybe we're processing the stuff we needed to then, but were too drugged up to, and it'll pass and we'll be in our 20s soon. Can relate. I was heavily into reconnecting with my life in my early 20s as I came off psych drugs. Definitely a healing modality, looking at the last time things were really on track. I am not a health professional - your actions are your own. Please do not seek tapering support via private message - "Any reason to hold is a good one" My taper visualised as a graph | My intro thread Backdrop: 2003 10mg olanzapine | 2004 2-3mg risperidone | end 2014 3wks aripiprazole 2015: olanzapine 10 -> 7½ -> 6⅔ -> 5mg by crude pill cutter 2018: Mar 5.00mg -> water titrated taper -> Aug2.5mg tablet and hold Jan 2019 2.50mg water titration -> Jan 2020 1.214 -> Jan 2021 0.44 -> 2 Oct 0.205 ->3 Oct ZERO🥂 Jun 2023 💉150mg paliperidone "loading" depot shot, 100mg 1wk after Jul 100mg Aug-Dec 75mg/4wks Jul 2023 2.50mg aripiprazole/day attempt to lower prolactin^ Jan-Feb 2024 cross taper off shots to 1mg risperidone Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country did to you" -- KMFDM Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 11 Author Share Posted January 11 12 hours ago, littlebird said: I'd be willing to skip the majority of my 20s tbh! 🤣 Or fast forward through them and only pause at the fun stuff. If it was just fun stuff like warehouse raves coming back it'd be a dream, but the feelings - ooh, not the most fun time traveling. The feelings? Just intense? Or difficult? Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 11 Author Share Posted January 11 18 minutes ago, hayduke said: Can relate. I was heavily into reconnecting with my life in my early 20s as I came off psych drugs. Definitely a healing modality, looking at the last time things were really on track. Yeah I seem to be reaching back or looking back to try to reconnect or find/meet myself. Bit lost if I’m honest but I’ve learned to be patient and this is a process…. Actually I’ve been lost most of my life so this may end up with me finding myself finally! Coming home to myself maybe…. How are you now that you’ve been off a good while? Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus hayduke Posted January 11 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 11 17 minutes ago, Thorin said: Yeah I seem to be reaching back or looking back to try to reconnect or find/meet myself. Bit lost if I’m honest but I’ve learned to be patient and this is a process…. Actually I’ve been lost most of my life so this may end up with me finding myself finally! Coming home to myself maybe…. How are you now that you’ve been off a good while? A lot of grief and anger came with getting off, and some paranoia. I got put back on around 18 months in, earlier this year. I have been continuing to take stock, deal with the family minefield, etc. Getting on in the general direction of what I would really like to do. I am not a health professional - your actions are your own. Please do not seek tapering support via private message - "Any reason to hold is a good one" My taper visualised as a graph | My intro thread Backdrop: 2003 10mg olanzapine | 2004 2-3mg risperidone | end 2014 3wks aripiprazole 2015: olanzapine 10 -> 7½ -> 6⅔ -> 5mg by crude pill cutter 2018: Mar 5.00mg -> water titrated taper -> Aug2.5mg tablet and hold Jan 2019 2.50mg water titration -> Jan 2020 1.214 -> Jan 2021 0.44 -> 2 Oct 0.205 ->3 Oct ZERO🥂 Jun 2023 💉150mg paliperidone "loading" depot shot, 100mg 1wk after Jul 100mg Aug-Dec 75mg/4wks Jul 2023 2.50mg aripiprazole/day attempt to lower prolactin^ Jan-Feb 2024 cross taper off shots to 1mg risperidone Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country did to you" -- KMFDM Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 11 Author Share Posted January 11 12 minutes ago, hayduke said: A lot of grief and anger came with getting off, and some paranoia. I got put back on around 18 months in, earlier this year. I have been continuing to take stock, deal with the family minefield, etc. Getting on in the general direction of what I would really like to do. I’ve been experiencing paranoia of sorts at times as well. I think it’s pretty common with trauma. Glad you’re heading in the direction you want to 🙏🏻 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 11 Author Share Posted January 11 14 minutes ago, hayduke said: A lot of grief and anger came with getting off, and some paranoia. I got put back on around 18 months in, earlier this year. I have been continuing to take stock, deal with the family minefield, etc. Getting on in the general direction of what I would really like to do. I’ve found it easier cutting ties with some family. Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 11 Author Share Posted January 11 15 minutes ago, hayduke said: A lot of grief and anger came with getting off, and some paranoia. I got put back on around 18 months in, earlier this year. I have been continuing to take stock, deal with the family minefield, etc. Getting on in the general direction of what I would really like to do. Are you ok with being back on meds? Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus hayduke Posted January 11 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 11 2 minutes ago, Thorin said: I’ve been experiencing paranoia of sorts at times as well. I think it’s pretty common with trauma. Glad you’re heading in the direction you want to 🙏🏻 Yeah, it is harsh how the DSM is used to mangle trauma symptoms into drug adminstration. Sounds like you are doing well with your taper. 1 minute ago, Thorin said: I’ve found it easier cutting ties with some family. For sure. In my case, some of them really don't like that. Just proving the point, but making it harder. Just now, Thorin said: Are you ok with being back on meds? Not really. I have become more aware of the dopamine supersensitivity issues from withdrawal. I always was worried about TD. I wouldn't be surprised if it settles down like TD might off drugs, given the chance. I will have to slow the tail end of my next taper, if that's what I elect to do, and readjust better to a lower dopamine blockade. 1 I am not a health professional - your actions are your own. Please do not seek tapering support via private message - "Any reason to hold is a good one" My taper visualised as a graph | My intro thread Backdrop: 2003 10mg olanzapine | 2004 2-3mg risperidone | end 2014 3wks aripiprazole 2015: olanzapine 10 -> 7½ -> 6⅔ -> 5mg by crude pill cutter 2018: Mar 5.00mg -> water titrated taper -> Aug2.5mg tablet and hold Jan 2019 2.50mg water titration -> Jan 2020 1.214 -> Jan 2021 0.44 -> 2 Oct 0.205 ->3 Oct ZERO🥂 Jun 2023 💉150mg paliperidone "loading" depot shot, 100mg 1wk after Jul 100mg Aug-Dec 75mg/4wks Jul 2023 2.50mg aripiprazole/day attempt to lower prolactin^ Jan-Feb 2024 cross taper off shots to 1mg risperidone Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country did to you" -- KMFDM Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 11 Author Share Posted January 11 13 minutes ago, hayduke said: Yeah, it is harsh how the DSM is used to mangle trauma symptoms into drug adminstration. I am the poster child of this. 14 minutes ago, hayduke said: Sounds like you are doing well with your taper. Well I’m tapering. Not sure if I’m doing well. Have had some serious anxiety the last few weeks and am terrified that it’s’me’. But that’s just the same old tapering crap really. If it’s not anxiety it’s something else. I won’t really know until I’ve been off everything for a while I guess. 15 minutes ago, hayduke said: For sure. In my case, some of them really don't like that. Just proving the point, but making it harder. As I say about certain member of my family ‘**** them’. 16 minutes ago, hayduke said: Not really. I have become more aware of the dopamine supersensitivity issues from withdrawal. I always was worried about TD. I wouldn't be surprised if it settles down like TD might off drugs, given the chance. I will have to slow the tail end of my next taper, if that's what I elect to do, and readjust better to a lower dopamine blockade. TD used to freak me out! I think it all settles the longer your’ee off the meds. But you need the resources and support to deal with the stuff that caused us to take meds in the first place. That’s not always available. Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus hayduke Posted January 12 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 12 15 hours ago, Thorin said: Well I’m tapering. Not sure if I’m doing well. Have had some serious anxiety the last few weeks and am terrified that it’s’me’. But that’s just the same old tapering crap really. If it’s not anxiety it’s something else. I won’t really know until I’ve been off everything for a while I guess. Does it abate when you hold? It might be a trauma symptom to address by other means, otherwise. 15 hours ago, Thorin said: TD used to freak me out! I think it all settles the longer your’ee off the meds. But you need the resources and support to deal with the stuff that caused us to take meds in the first place. That’s not always available. Yeah. I had a bunch of adverse stuff going on at that period. I thought I was further out of the woods at 18 months clear. Since I had been on those drugs for 20 years, I needed to take more care. It means the next taper will have to be slower at the lower levels, probably a long hold at some point when I start to notice dopamine twitchiness. I think dopamine sensitivity fuelled my paranoia, the foundations of it are from my family though. I am not a health professional - your actions are your own. Please do not seek tapering support via private message - "Any reason to hold is a good one" My taper visualised as a graph | My intro thread Backdrop: 2003 10mg olanzapine | 2004 2-3mg risperidone | end 2014 3wks aripiprazole 2015: olanzapine 10 -> 7½ -> 6⅔ -> 5mg by crude pill cutter 2018: Mar 5.00mg -> water titrated taper -> Aug2.5mg tablet and hold Jan 2019 2.50mg water titration -> Jan 2020 1.214 -> Jan 2021 0.44 -> 2 Oct 0.205 ->3 Oct ZERO🥂 Jun 2023 💉150mg paliperidone "loading" depot shot, 100mg 1wk after Jul 100mg Aug-Dec 75mg/4wks Jul 2023 2.50mg aripiprazole/day attempt to lower prolactin^ Jan-Feb 2024 cross taper off shots to 1mg risperidone Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country did to you" -- KMFDM Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 13 Author Share Posted January 13 On 1/12/2024 at 11:01 AM, hayduke said: Does it abate when you hold? It might be a trauma symptom to address by other means, otherwise. It comes and goes and when I have it it doesn’t seem to be caused by anything in particular. Before I restarted my taper I’d done a bunch of work and had zero anxiety. It’s so hard to tell the cause and I’m not sure I’ll truly know until I get off the Benzo and heal. On 1/12/2024 at 11:01 AM, hayduke said: Yeah. I had a bunch of adverse stuff going on at that period. I thought I was further out of the woods at 18 months clear. Since I had been on those drugs for 20 years, I needed to take more care. It means the next taper will have to be slower at the lower levels, probably a long hold at some point when I start to notice dopamine twitchiness. I think dopamine sensitivity fuelled my paranoia, the foundations of it are from my family though. The paranoia can be scary! I can get it pretty strongly but for me it’s quite specific (people and social situations). I believe that for me it’s trauma blown up by withdrawal. It always passes. 1 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus hayduke Posted January 13 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 13 1 hour ago, Thorin said: The paranoia can be scary! I can get it pretty strongly but for me it’s quite specific (people and social situations). I believe that for me it’s trauma blown up by withdrawal. It always passes. Yeah, it's not the strangest symptom when your family is targetting you. No fun though. 1 I am not a health professional - your actions are your own. Please do not seek tapering support via private message - "Any reason to hold is a good one" My taper visualised as a graph | My intro thread Backdrop: 2003 10mg olanzapine | 2004 2-3mg risperidone | end 2014 3wks aripiprazole 2015: olanzapine 10 -> 7½ -> 6⅔ -> 5mg by crude pill cutter 2018: Mar 5.00mg -> water titrated taper -> Aug2.5mg tablet and hold Jan 2019 2.50mg water titration -> Jan 2020 1.214 -> Jan 2021 0.44 -> 2 Oct 0.205 ->3 Oct ZERO🥂 Jun 2023 💉150mg paliperidone "loading" depot shot, 100mg 1wk after Jul 100mg Aug-Dec 75mg/4wks Jul 2023 2.50mg aripiprazole/day attempt to lower prolactin^ Jan-Feb 2024 cross taper off shots to 1mg risperidone Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country did to you" -- KMFDM Link to comment
j1290 Posted January 14 Share Posted January 14 On 1/12/2024 at 4:53 PM, Thorin said: I believe that for me it’s trauma blown up by withdrawal. Nailed it. 1 I am not a doctor and do not offer any medical advice, only my own experience. Consult your physician. 2011-2015 tapered off 300MG of Effexor. Back in the Paxil Progress days. No rebound. 2005-2021: 450 mg Bupropion XL Daily 2021 Buporopion May 450mg/June 400mg/July 375mg/Aug 10th 360mg/ 2021 Dec - 150mg IR, 3x day = 450mg Bup, Heritage manufacturer-yellow color pill. 2022 May 3 - 3 x 150mg IR Bup, Avet brand(pharmacist said they merged with Heritage-orange color) -migraines REINSTATED-BACK TO MY LAST STABLE DOSE/TIME RELEASE 2022 June 5 - switched back to 3 x 150mg XL one time per day= 450 mg total Bup-Apotex brand CURRENT TAPER 2022 Aug 31 - 450MG to 412MG IR Bup//Sep. 28, 2022: 412mg to 375mg//Oct 26, 2022: 375mg to 365 mg//Nov 21, 2022: 365mg to 327mg//Dec 27, 2022: 327 mg to 290 mg//Dec 31, 2022: 290mg to 262mg//Jan 28, 2023: 262mg to 190mg//Feb. 19, 2023: 190mg to 140mg//Mar. 18, '23: 140mg to 100mg// Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 21 Author Share Posted January 21 After a period of insomnia I can’t stop sleeping. And I’m dreaming vivid dreams for the first time in…… 20 years??? Ready for all this to be over. I’m down to 0.238mg of clonazepam. Still have quite a few months of my taper to go but am slowly making progress. Wondering what my life will be at the end of this. I think my relationship is mostly over (not her choice, I have so many crazy feelings about my relationship now). I’m ready for some peace and calm. 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 21 Author Share Posted January 21 I think I’m feeling a bit…… forgotten. My daughter is nearly 18. She’s out living her best life. She’s having a great time with friends and her boyfriend and I’m really happy for her. I remember this part of my life and it was amazing. The freedom, the excitement. Exploring myself and everything around me. Had my first big love at that age just like she seems to be doing. But I’m feeling a bit left behind. I want to just be happy and excited but I’m also sad that she’s moving out into the world without me. I know she needs to do this but I feel a little forgotten I guess. I’ll be ok, I just need to get it out somewhere i guess and this is it. She tends to message me when she’s bored at work and that’s it these days. I get it, I’m dad, and I’m also not as much fun as I used to be atm because of withdrawal. I’m not out with friends all the time, eating and drinking. I’m probably a little heavy to be around. Next year she’ll probably move to Melbourne and I’ll see her even less. Not sure how to handle it and I’m also emotional because of WD. I love her a lot. She was my first child and a bit of a mini me in many ways (also very much her own person!). I live out of town and her mum lives in town where her friends, work and boyfriend are so she spends more time at her mum’s these days. In the flip side my son spends more time out here. I guess I need to find some new hobbies to fill some of the space that her presence use to fill. I don’t even really know how to draw us closer again. Or if I even should try to do that. She probably needs to break away and do her thing. Normal development and all that. It’s weird being a parent. Seems not long ago it was me moving away from my family and exploring the world (and I did, I left and just kept going!). I’m glad she’s happy. I just miss our time together. Something we did from a young age was daddy/daughter dinner dates. It’s harder to do that now because of WD but maybe I need to make some extra effort in this area. At the same time it would be nice to spend time together that doesn’t require me spending lots of money. 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 24 Author Share Posted January 24 So it got to the point where I have left my relationship. Very painful and quite scary as a parent of two teens and after being together for 10 years. Pretty nervous I’ll go into a wave so may hold my dose for a little bit. Unfortunately due to the cost of living I’m stuck in the same house with her for I don’t know how long. I’ll need to find a place as soon as possible but I don’t know how anyone affords to rent a three bedroom home on their own. 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Addax Posted January 24 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 24 Oh Thorin! I am very sorry to hear you’re going through this. It sounds like an incredibly painful and uncomfortable situation. I wish I could come up with something to say that would ease the pain and discomfort. It will be hard for a while, no doubt. But even while it’s hard, you will find your way, and your place and in time it won’t feel so hard nor so painful. Don’t forget to breathe and ask for help. Sending you a hug… 1 1988-2012: Prozac @ 60mg (with a few stops and starts) Fall 2012: Returned to 40mg after discontinuing and horrid withdrawal Fall 2013: 40mg Fluoxetine, added 150mg Wellbutrin to treat fatigue Winter 2014: Attempting to taper both (too fast) April 2014: 9mg Fluoxetine + 37.5 Wellbutrin Summer 2014: 8 mg Fluoxetine + 0 Wellbutrin (way too fast a drop) Late summer/Early Fall 2014: Debilitating Withdrawal symptoms Fall 2014 - Wellbutrin successfully kicked to the curb but… Oct- Dec 2014: Panicked reinstatement of Fluoxetine ->30mg - held for 5yrs Jan 2021: taper to 20mg Fluoxetine then tapering by 1mg every 2-3 months Fall 2022 - held at 10mg->December 2022: 9mg->Feb 2023: 8mg ->March 2023: brassmonkey slide begins: 7.8mg -> 7.6 -> 7.4->2 week hold (April)->7.2->7mg->6.8->2 week hold->6.6-> 1-month hold ->(June)-6.5->4-week hold-> (July)-6.4 (discontinued brassmonkey slide and slowed taper)-> (Aug)-6.2->(Sept)-6.0->(Oct)-5.9->(Nov)-5.8->(Dec)-5.7->wave!->(Jan)-5.8->(Feb)-6mg and holding. My 2014 withdrawal experience: https://rxisk.org/antidepressant-withdrawal-a-prozac-story/ Link to comment
Moderator FireflyFyte Posted January 25 Moderator Share Posted January 25 On 1/23/2024 at 7:17 PM, Thorin said: So it got to the point where I have left my relationship. Very painful and quite scary as a parent of two teens and after being together for 10 years. Pretty nervous I’ll go into a wave so may hold my dose for a little bit. I am sorry to read this, Thorin. I think you are making the right decision to hold for now given your situation. We are here if you want to chat. 3 Pre- October 2022: Wellbutrin, Escitalopram, Citalopram, Sertraline, Adderall IR, Vyvanse, Propranolol, Buspar, Ativan, and Latuda Oct 13, 2022 - Oct 24, 2022 and Oct 31, 2022 - Present: Zyprexa (2.5 mg). Jan 14, 2023 -> Began transition to liquid suspension. Jan 29, 2023 = 2.375mg -> Feb 12, 2023 = 2.25mg -> Feb 27, 2023 = 2.14mg -> Mar 12, 2023 = 2.025mg -> Mar 27, 2023 = 1.93mg -> Apr 10, 2023 = 1.82mg -> Apr 23, 2023 = 1.74mg -> May 7, 2023 = 1.64mg -> May 21, 2023 = 1.56mg -> June 4, 2023 = 1.48mg -> June 19, 2023 = 1.4mg -> July 2, 2023 = 1.33mg -> July 16, 2023 = 1.26mg -> July 31, 2023 = 1.2mg -> Aug 13, 2023 = 1.14mg -> Aug 27, 2023 = 1.08mg -> Sep 13, 2023 = 1.02mg -> Jan 22, 2024 = 0.97mg -> Feb 4, 2024 = 0.92mg -> Feb 19, 2024 = 0.87mg -> Mar 3, 2024 = 0.83mg -> Mar 17, 2024 = 0.78mg -> Mar 31, 2024 = 0.74mg -> Apr 14, 2024 = 0.7mg -> Apr 28, 2024 = 0.66mg -> May 12, 2024 = 0.63mg Oct 14, 2022 - Present: Prozac (40mg) upped from 20mg on Nov 1, 2022. Oct 31, 2022 - Present: Gabapentin (300mg 3x day) -> May 3, 2023 = 300mg 2x day -> Oct 1, 2023 = 570mg -> Oct 15, 2023 = 540mg -> Oct 29, 2023 = 510mg -> Nov 13, 2023 = 484mg -> Nov 27, 2023 = 460mg -> Dec 9, 2023 = 436mg -> Dec 24, 2023 = 414mg -> Jan 7, 2024 = 400mg Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 26 Author Share Posted January 26 On 1/26/2024 at 7:49 AM, FireflyFyte said: I am sorry to read this, Thorin. I think you are making the right decision to hold for now given your situation. We are here if you want to chat. Thanks FfF. Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 26 Author Share Posted January 26 On 1/25/2024 at 10:37 AM, Addax said: Oh Thorin! I am very sorry to hear you’re going through this. It sounds like an incredibly painful and uncomfortable situation. I wish I could come up with something to say that would ease the pain and discomfort. It will be hard for a while, no doubt. But even while it’s hard, you will find your way, and your place and in time it won’t feel so hard nor so painful. Don’t forget to breathe and ask for help. Sending you a hug… Thanks Addax. A few massive hugs would be welcome right now for sure. Very difficult, painful and stressful times but I can also see this is the only path forward. I seem to be doing it despite withdrawal and how hard this stuff even when you’re not in withdrawal. Thanks for checking in 🙏🏻 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted January 28 Author Share Posted January 28 So I had a a little holiday booked with my brother and his partner. This was booked in ages ago prior to restarting my taper. It was hard having to entertain and we had some pretty big days and I was pretty exhausted but I did pretty well despite WD and the recent breakup. Also my GI issues that I’ve been dealing with for 18 months or more seem to be easing up a little. So good to see issues resolve as I slowly get off this muck. 3 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 16 Author Share Posted February 16 I’ve been doing much better lately which is reassuring. My symptoms are much less severe lately. I’ve had some intense anxiety which is horrible but most other symptoms have been less. Today I’ve hit a wave though. And it sucks 🤦♂️. But hopefullly I’ll feel better tomorrow and I can get back out there again. How I’m feeling today is how I was feeling most of the time a few weeks ago. Now it really stands out as a bad day because the other days have been easier. I can only assume that things will continue to improve if o stay at the slow taper pace I’ve been keeping. My social anxiety has been pretty bad lately. I had bad social anxiety as a kid and teenager and it kinda takes me back to those days. I get irrationally worried that I’ll go back to feeling how I did as a kid full time. That fear’s possibly been the hardest part of my withdrawal journey. Anyway. This wave will pass soon and I’ll be out in the sun again. Hopefully the anxiety starts to ease off a little soon. It’s really intense! 1 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Mentor littlebird Posted February 16 Mentor Share Posted February 16 11 hours ago, Thorin said: My social anxiety has been pretty bad lately. I had bad social anxiety as a kid and teenager and it kinda takes me back to those days. I get irrationally worried that I’ll go back to feeling how I did as a kid full time. Mine too! I've been feeling mad shy too, it's harder to be my "usual" outgoing self and I have the same fear - will this be the new normal? Since we started meds as teens, maybe we're just processing stuff that was numbed out for decades and once we figure out ways to self-soothe the feelings that were medicated for so long we can get back to how we used to be. I've been thinking I need to find some new coping skills for the social anxiety, especially since I can no longer just crack open a beer about it. Pronouns: they/them/theirs Started on Prozac in early 2000s to treat cPTSD, been on various cocktails ever since. 2002-2004, 2017-2022: Buspar, tapered down to 0 2016-present: 100mg Seroquel for sleep -> May 2023: 90mg -> June 2023: 81mg -> September 2023: 72mg -> switched to brand name, much too strong, down to 60mg -> October 2023: 54mg -> November 2023: 50mg -> January 2024: 45mg -> April 2024: 40.5mg 2016-Present: 100mg Wellbutrin SR -> January 2023: 75mg IR (37.5mg 2x a day) -> February 2023 (33.75mg 2x a day) -> July 2023 (30.37mg 2x a day) -> August 2023: 27.33mg 2x a day 2018-present: 25mg Pristiq 2015-present: 600mg Gabapentin (200mg 3x a day) -> December 2022: 300mg Gabapentin (100mg 3x a day) per GP's recommendation after side effects -> March 2023: 90mg 3x a day (switched to liquid suspension) -> April 2023: 81mg 3x a day -> September 2023: bad generic, switched back to homemade liquid; too strong after bad generic, down to 70mg 3x a day, still bad. Adjusted slowly till at 60mg 3x a day, much better. Long hold till -> December 2023: 54mg, still feels too high after November Seroquel switch from brand name to generic, doc recommended 50mg which feels better -> January 2024: When Wellbutrin went down, Gabapentin started putting me to sleep, went down to 45mg, then 41mg to stay awake, so far so good -> February 2024: 36mg, still too high, 34mg -> March 2024: 31mg, STILL too high, 30mg Supplements: Multivitamin w/magnesium, probiotics, digestive enzymes, anti-viral nitric oxide nose spray as needed Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 16 Author Share Posted February 16 4 hours ago, littlebird said: Mine too! I've been feeling mad shy too, it's harder to be my "usual" outgoing self and I have the same fear - will this be the new normal? Since we started meds as teens, maybe we're just processing stuff that was numbed out for decades and once we figure out ways to self-soothe the feelings that were medicated for so long we can get back to how we used to be. I've been thinking I need to find some new coping skills for the social anxiety, especially since I can no longer just crack open a beer about it. It’s got wrenching but from what I read if we face it no matter how hard it is we can get past it. Same about the alcohol. Can’t hide behind that either. Can you hold your dose or slow your taper for a little and see whether that gives you some relief? Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Mentor littlebird Posted February 17 Mentor Share Posted February 17 2 hours ago, Thorin said: Can you hold your dose or slow your taper for a little and see whether that gives you some relief? Coming off a long hold, every dose of everything is still hitting too hard... thinking it's time for a lowering of something. Are you still holding? Pronouns: they/them/theirs Started on Prozac in early 2000s to treat cPTSD, been on various cocktails ever since. 2002-2004, 2017-2022: Buspar, tapered down to 0 2016-present: 100mg Seroquel for sleep -> May 2023: 90mg -> June 2023: 81mg -> September 2023: 72mg -> switched to brand name, much too strong, down to 60mg -> October 2023: 54mg -> November 2023: 50mg -> January 2024: 45mg -> April 2024: 40.5mg 2016-Present: 100mg Wellbutrin SR -> January 2023: 75mg IR (37.5mg 2x a day) -> February 2023 (33.75mg 2x a day) -> July 2023 (30.37mg 2x a day) -> August 2023: 27.33mg 2x a day 2018-present: 25mg Pristiq 2015-present: 600mg Gabapentin (200mg 3x a day) -> December 2022: 300mg Gabapentin (100mg 3x a day) per GP's recommendation after side effects -> March 2023: 90mg 3x a day (switched to liquid suspension) -> April 2023: 81mg 3x a day -> September 2023: bad generic, switched back to homemade liquid; too strong after bad generic, down to 70mg 3x a day, still bad. Adjusted slowly till at 60mg 3x a day, much better. Long hold till -> December 2023: 54mg, still feels too high after November Seroquel switch from brand name to generic, doc recommended 50mg which feels better -> January 2024: When Wellbutrin went down, Gabapentin started putting me to sleep, went down to 45mg, then 41mg to stay awake, so far so good -> February 2024: 36mg, still too high, 34mg -> March 2024: 31mg, STILL too high, 30mg Supplements: Multivitamin w/magnesium, probiotics, digestive enzymes, anti-viral nitric oxide nose spray as needed Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 17 Author Share Posted February 17 2 minutes ago, littlebird said: Coming off a long hold, every dose of everything is still hitting too hard... thinking it's time for a lowering of something. Are you still holding? No I’m back tapering but much slower. Seems to be helping. Was in a bad wave yesterday but not as bad as they have been and seems it only lasted one day instead of 3. Pretty symptomatic in general with some general improvements as well. Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
j1290 Posted February 17 Share Posted February 17 8 hours ago, littlebird said: I've been thinking I need to find some new coping skills for the social anxiety, especially since I can no longer just crack open a beer about it. I need to do a better job of addressing my anxiety with all the different modalities because I think that'll help my social anxiety too, come think of it 😂 The most effective thing for social anxiety specifically that I've done lately is simple exposure therapy. I've been doing these meetup groups for pub crawls and they legit forced me to talk to everyone in the group, the organizer made it a point that we all had to mix and mingle 😵💫😆 Almost like Toastmasters where they make you talk in public. It's way out of my comfort zone but sure enough, after doing it a few times I'm going into a bar alone and talking to people I never met before and it's much easier. It's good practice, I think. Another normie looking guy there told me he got the same thoughts before going, how much he didn't want to do it and had excuses not to go, but had fun once he got there 😄 1 I am not a doctor and do not offer any medical advice, only my own experience. Consult your physician. 2011-2015 tapered off 300MG of Effexor. Back in the Paxil Progress days. No rebound. 2005-2021: 450 mg Bupropion XL Daily 2021 Buporopion May 450mg/June 400mg/July 375mg/Aug 10th 360mg/ 2021 Dec - 150mg IR, 3x day = 450mg Bup, Heritage manufacturer-yellow color pill. 2022 May 3 - 3 x 150mg IR Bup, Avet brand(pharmacist said they merged with Heritage-orange color) -migraines REINSTATED-BACK TO MY LAST STABLE DOSE/TIME RELEASE 2022 June 5 - switched back to 3 x 150mg XL one time per day= 450 mg total Bup-Apotex brand CURRENT TAPER 2022 Aug 31 - 450MG to 412MG IR Bup//Sep. 28, 2022: 412mg to 375mg//Oct 26, 2022: 375mg to 365 mg//Nov 21, 2022: 365mg to 327mg//Dec 27, 2022: 327 mg to 290 mg//Dec 31, 2022: 290mg to 262mg//Jan 28, 2023: 262mg to 190mg//Feb. 19, 2023: 190mg to 140mg//Mar. 18, '23: 140mg to 100mg// Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 17 Author Share Posted February 17 Wow that’s the fastest I’ve recovered from a wave….. well ever. I was a wreck yesterday. Waking up this morning was tough but then I was able to mow the lawn (it’s small). Take some garbage to the tip (not sure what you guys call the tip overseas. The dump? Went to the gym for the first time in 15 years and did a gentle work out and going out for a friends birthday dinner tonight. And yesterday I was too sick to work. I also dealt with some stuff with each kid individually today and handled it really well. It’s been a reasonable day and if I focus on what I’m achieving rather than how I feel then I’m coming along pretty well. 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 17 Author Share Posted February 17 4 hours ago, j1290 said: I need to do a better job of addressing my anxiety with all the different modalities because I think that'll help my social anxiety too, come think of it 😂 The most effective thing for social anxiety specifically that I've done lately is simple exposure therapy. I've been doing these meetup groups for pub crawls and they legit forced me to talk to everyone in the group, the organizer made it a point that we all had to mix and mingle 😵💫😆 Almost like Toastmasters where they make you talk in public. It's way out of my comfort zone but sure enough, after doing it a few times I'm going into a bar alone and talking to people I never met before and it's much easier. It's good practice, I think. Another normie looking guy there told me he got the same thoughts before going, how much he didn't want to do it and had excuses not to go, but had fun once he got there 😄 Man I think you’re doing all the things. That’s how you beat this. By doing what you’re doing over and over again. 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 20 Author Share Posted February 20 I’m noticing some of the symptoms I’ve been struggling with are easing. Benzo belly is gone and the GI issues I’ve been struggling with for ages are clearing up. Less head stuff. Less dizziness. Less eye stuff. Still ruminating and obsessing but I hear that can be one of the last things to go. More emotion coming through which is a double edged sword but better than being completely numb and blank. Apart from last night sleep is better. Less fatigue. The constant dread and DP/DR has eased a bit. Getting flashed of better feelings come though. Just moments but it’s there. Easier to focus. Memory a bit better. Lots of little improvements over the last few weeks. A ways to go but on the right track it seems. 1 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
Mentor Catina7 Posted February 20 Mentor Share Posted February 20 5 minutes ago, Thorin said: I’m noticing some of the symptoms I’ve been struggling with are easing. Benzo belly is gone and the GI issues I’ve been struggling with for ages are clearing up. Less head stuff. Less dizziness. Less eye stuff. Still ruminating and obsessing but I hear that can be one of the last things to go. More emotion coming through which is a double edged sword but better than being completely numb and blank. Apart from last night sleep is better. Less fatigue. The constant dread and DP/DR has eased a bit. Getting flashed of better feelings come though. Just moments but it’s there. Easier to focus. Memory a bit better. Lots of little improvements over the last few weeks. A ways to go but on the right track it seems. I'm glad that things are improving for you! Keep up the great work @Thorin. You've come a long way and deserve a little relief. 😊 Disclaimer: This is not professional medical advice but is based on personal experience only. 1994 - 2017: Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Paxil, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Seroquel, Buspar, Lorazepam, Xanax, Ambien 2005-present: Trazodone 50 mg 2017: Effexor XR 37.5 >> 75 mg 2020 (March): Began 10% monthly taper of Effexor XR (got down to 12 mg) 2021 (September): Completely crashed. Went back up to 37.5 mg but in doing so I kindled myself 2024: 1/1: 35.6 mg (-6 beads) | 2/1: 33.8 mg (-11 beads) | 3/1: 32.1 mg (-16 beads) | 4/1: (-18 beads) | 5/1: (-21 beads) Reasons for starting psych meds: PMDD/Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder Other medications: Levothyroxine 75 mcg Supplements: Dr. Berg's Electrolyte Powder on occasion Link to comment
Thorin Posted February 20 Author Share Posted February 20 2 minutes ago, Catina7 said: I'm glad that things are improving for you! Keep up the great work @Thorin. You've come a long way and deserve a little relief. 😊 Thanks @Catina7. I feel like the finish line for the Benzo is nearly in sight. If I’m lucky I’ll be off by the end of the year. How are you doing? Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Age 44 (August 2023 -restarted clonazepam taper). Start dose 0.375mg. 1/9/2023 - 0.365mg; 1/10/2023 - 0.324mg; 1/11/2023 - 0.264mg; 1/12/2023 - 0.25 mg (holding); 1/2/2024 - 0.232mg; 1/3/2024 - 0.221mg; 1/4/2024 - 0.205mg; Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, CBD/THC. Link to comment
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