Caesar65: Escitalopram withdrawal within only 5 weeks after taking it for 18 years/unbearable symptoms since 1 year after withdrawal/advice urgently needed!

[LostInCanada]

@Caesar65 have you heard about lavender oil. Like all supplements when going through withdrawal, a little goes a long way. 

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19962288/ 

One of the moderators suggests 2-3 drops of lavender oil in a glass of water. Do not use a tincture as they have alcohol. Use a good quality organic one. If after 45 minutes you don't see relief try 2 more drops. Don't overuse.

[Caesar65]

26 minutes ago, LostInCanada said:

What are the negative effects of doxylamine succinate?

But I already had the drowsiness, decreased coordination before taking it.

I just was taking it for 2 days now, because nothing helps me to sleep. 
And it doesn’t help so far. The severe constipation I also already have since reinstating. Before that I only was taking herbal pills, with melatonin, but doesn’t help, too. 
I just want to sleep. 

 

[LostInCanada]

2 minutes ago, Caesar65 said:

But I already had the drowsiness, decreased coordination before taking it.

I just was taking it for 2 days now, because nothing helps me to sleep. 
And it doesn’t help so far. The severe constipation I also already have since reinstating.

 

Well taking this drug won't help any of those things. Thankfully you can just stop it without withdrawal too. Try the lavender. I only sleep 90 minutes at a time but I try not to stress about it and just try to meditate on good, relax and pray at that time. I figure at least that is better worrying. Acceptance is powerful. 👍

[Caesar65]

6 hours ago, Catina7 said:

Sending you much love and thoughts of peace and healing @Caesar65.  Keep fighting with everything you have.  We're all rooting for you....you're never alone!  

Thank you so very much for your kind words🙏🌹I am so full of despair, I think this reinstating was the wrong way to get rid of my withdrawal symptoms. Don’t know what to do anymore. And the time before reinstating was also unbearable😢

[Healingcontinues]

Hi Caesar,

 

I am so sorry to read everything that you are going through, and the plethora of awful symptoms that you are dealing with and have been dealing with so long. I can hear your pain and your desperation and I just want to let you know that I hear you and I see you.

 

I am not a moderator or anywhere near in the position to give you advice of what to do about the reinstatement and how to move forward with that because I did everything wrong and found SA too late. But, I have been exactly where you are. I  tapered (essentially CT) off of sertraline , and was off it for many months before I stared Escitalopram. From the very first pill of Escitalopram I lost the ability to sleep, which was something I did not have before. I was so distraught as insomnia means no escape or relief from all the other things. I know so well how terrible not being able to sleep is and how it feels like torture. It makes everything so much worse and even harder to endure. But not sleeping will not kill you. I tried everything I could to fix the sleeping issue too as I believed that I would not heal if I did not sleep. This is not true. For many months I didn’t sleep at all, but this gradually returned. Not at once and not in a linear way but it did. Yours will too. @Happy2Heal also had terrible insomnia and her sleep retuned. You will get through this. Rest when you can. Even lying in bed and watching your breath is healing to the body and restorative.
 

I have had every symptom you described. I know when you are in the thick of it you feel that your case is the worst and that you can’t possibly continue to live like this. I just want to tell you that you can. When people on this site tell you it gets better they are right. You MUST hang on to that, even if you don’t believe it. Each time you think you cannot go on any longer, you remind yourself that you can. I am so much better than I was. You will get there too. 
 

Warm wishes, HC ❤️
 

 

[Caesar65]

1 hour ago, Healingcontinues said:

Hi Caesar,

 

I am so sorry to read everything that you are going through, and the plethora of awful symptoms that you are dealing with and have been dealing with so long. I can hear your pain and your desperation and I just want to let you know that I hear you and I see you.

 

I am not a moderator or anywhere near in the position to give you advice of what to do about the reinstatement and how to move forward with that because I did everything wrong and found SA too late. But, I have been exactly where you are. I  tapered (essentially CT) off of sertraline , and was off it for many months before I stared Escitalopram. From the very first pill of Escitalopram I lost the ability to sleep, which was something I did not have before. I was so distraught as insomnia means no escape or relief from all the other things. I know so well how terrible not being able to sleep is and how it feels like torture. It makes everything so much worse and even harder to endure. But not sleeping will not kill you. I tried everything I could to fix the sleeping issue too as I believed that I would not heal if I did not sleep. This is not true. For many months I didn’t sleep at all, but this gradually returned. Not at once and not in a linear way but it did. Yours will too. @Happy2Heal also had terrible insomnia and her sleep retuned. You will get through this. Rest when you can. Even lying in bed and watching your breath is healing to the body and restorative.
 

I have had every symptom you described. I know when you are in the thick of it you feel that your case is the worst and that you can’t possibly continue to live like this. I just want to tell you that you can. When people on this site tell you it gets better they are right. You MUST hang on to that, even if you don’t believe it. Each time you think you cannot go on any longer, you remind yourself that you can. I am so much better than I was. You will get there too. 
 

Warm wishes, HC ❤️
 

 

I thank you so much, 🌹 but I am not able to write as I usually want to, and like to, but my head is not clear at all. I think about if I should better stop immediately this reinstating process, it’s since 4 weeks now, that I started. 
And this severe insomnia, urgent need urinating several times every night,

severe constipation, all these symptoms I have now in addition to my withdrawal symptoms! 

And the strong kognitive disorders, anxiety, heart palpitations aso everything is still there, I don’t feel relief until now. 
I don’t know what to,do, whether continue or not. 
I am hopeless 😢 All I want is deep sleep. I have no clear thinking anymore, it’s getting worse, it seems. But that was also the case before reinstating.And the simplest things like writing the every day list is very exhausting for me, it’s frightening. 
Warm wishes to you! Stay in Touch! 🌹🙏 

 

 

[Chompoo]

@Healingcontinues please excuse me for jumping in, but do you mind sharing your healing journey from insomnia? I took only one pill of an antidepressant (Mirtazapine) and developed an immediate adverse reaction. It's been 11 weeks and I'm still struggling with sleep.

In the beginning, I couldn't sleep a wink for 5 days. Then I began sleeping 2 hours a night. The number of hours I sleep has increased over time in 11 weeks, to 4-5 broken hours on most days. On some lucky days, I sleep 6-7 broken hours. But there are also nights that I've slept 2-3 broken hours.

I know everyone is different. But did your sleep improve with the number of hours of unbroken sleep? The regularity of number of hours of sleep every night? How long was it before you managed to sleep 8 unbroken hours?

You mentioned the healing journey is not linear. Did your sleep go backwards after a period of sustained improvements?

I'm trying to understand what lays ahead of me in the healing curve. Thank you.

[AmitV]

56 minutes ago, Chompoo said:

@Healingcontinues please excuse me for jumping in, but do you mind sharing your healing journey from insomnia? I took only one pill of an antidepressant (Mirtazapine) and developed an immediate adverse reaction. It's been 11 weeks and I'm still struggling with sleep.

In the beginning, I couldn't sleep a wink for 5 days. Then I began sleeping 2 hours a night. The number of hours I sleep has increased over time in 11 weeks, to 4-5 broken hours on most days. On some lucky days, I sleep 6-7 broken hours. But there are also nights that I've slept 2-3 broken hours.

I know everyone is different. But did your sleep improve with the number of hours of unbroken sleep? The regularity of number of hours of sleep every night? How long was it before you managed to sleep 8 unbroken hours?

You mentioned the healing journey is not linear. Did your sleep go backwards after a period of sustained improvements?

I'm trying to understand what lays ahead of me in the healing curve. Thank you.

 

Sleep is actually the most important aspect of recovery from withdrawals or adverse reaction in your case. It's unfortunate that you're still going through this. As much as there is a huge list of do's and don'ts recommended by SA. Nothing will speed the process up until your nervous system and your brain will heal which occurs at a lightning fast speed during good sleep.

 

At this point I would recommend you start looking at options to get your sleep intact. Start with the tea's, if they don't work then take half diphenhydramine (OTC antihistamine sleep aid). Half should do the trick with your 4-6hr broken sleep pattern. Try these options before considering prescription alternatives. 

 

You may find that just 2-4 nights of good sleep utilizing an aid may get you back into a comfortable sleep pattern.

[Altostrata]

On 4/22/2023 at 2:45 AM, Caesar65 said:

And I don’t have breakfast every day. 

 

Eat breakfast every day. Low blood sugar can cause symptoms.

 

We would not have suggested you increase Lexapro to 1mg. If I were you, I'd reduce it to 0.5mg, take  at the same time each day. 

[Caesar65]

2 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

Eat breakfast every day. Low blood sugar can cause symptoms.

 

We would not have suggested you increase Lexapro to 1mg. If I were you, I'd reduce it to 0.5mg, take  at the same time each day. 

Thank you, I have reduced since today back

to 0,5 mg, but how long should I take it?! 
Should I stop after a while? 
 

What about my inability to sleep?

And the other side effects? 
 

I tried it for two days with doxylaminsuccanat, but it didn’t help and the other day yesterday I had enormous brain fog and especially terrible feelings all day long. And melatonin doesn’t help either, I didn’t sleep at all, the whole night through. Never ever had this kind of insomnia before. 

 

[Chompoo]

@Caesar65 I had 5 days of total insomnia (0 hour sleep) right after my immediate adverse reaction to one pill of Mirtazepine. Don't worry about not being able to sleep. Eventually, your body will crash after a few days from lack of sleep and give you a few hours of sleep. 

[Altostrata]

@Caesar65 do you get 4-6 hours of sleep per night?

 

1 hour ago, Caesar65 said:

but how long should I take it?! 

 

It depends. We need daily symptom notes to answer these questions. It would help if you would stop taking your drugs irregularly and experimenting with others.

[LostInCanada]

@Caesar65 did you try the lavender oil before bed to relax? Read about sleep hygiene. Your body needs a regular routine for everything to make it easier heal. Wake at the same time, go to bed at the same time, eat at the same time, take your drug at the same time. Melatonin (just 1/4 or 1/2 a 1 mg pill) needs to be taken about an hour before bed and after you take it no TV or devices. You are going to bed too late which won't help either. You have to try to reset your biological clock.  My sleep is horrible but doing these things I have seen improvement and have gotten a 3 hour stretch the last few nights. 👍

[manymoretodays]

7 hours ago, Altostrata said:

If I were you, I'd reduce it to 0.5mg, take  at the same time each day. 

 

I would too, if I were you Caesar65.......just decrease now, rather than abandon completely.

 

Try blender concoctions in the morning.  I get my spinach, blueberries, sometimes a banana(leave out if constipated now), blended up with cranberry juice, sometimes yogurt.......sometimes kefir and that is great first thing in my day.  Seems to keep me real regular too.

 

With the lavender oil I'm seeing so frequently recommended orally so much lately.......Just start sparingingly.  A drop in a glass of water and only drink 1/2 your first trial.  Or diffuse it, into the air.  I've seen the article cited and again......this is WD.  With no ready or easy cure- all. 

Start low, go slow.  As so many of us ARE sensitive to so much.  Just saying and reiterating.

You might benefit from just a little and it's worth a trial, as so many of your symptoms are more activated......cortisol awakenings, going into fear states and scared so much.......

 

Nice to see everyone stopping by.  I sure appreciate as I think Caesar65 does too.  💜

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

[Caesar65]

On 4/23/2023 at 11:23 PM, Healingcontinues said:

Hi Caesar,

 

I am so sorry to read everything that you are going through, and the plethora of awful symptoms that you are dealing with and have been dealing with so long. I can hear your pain and your desperation and I just want to let you know that I hear you and I see you.

 

I am not a moderator or anywhere near in the position to give you advice of what to do about the reinstatement and how to move forward with that because I did everything wrong and found SA too late. But, I have been exactly where you are. I  tapered (essentially CT) off of sertraline , and was off it for many months before I stared Escitalopram. From the very first pill of Escitalopram I lost the ability to sleep, which was something I did not have before. I was so distraught as insomnia means no escape or relief from all the other things. I know so well how terrible not being able to sleep is and how it feels like torture. It makes everything so much worse and even harder to endure. But not sleeping will not kill you. I tried everything I could to fix the sleeping issue too as I believed that I would not heal if I did not sleep. This is not true. For many months I didn’t sleep at all, but this gradually returned. Not at once and not in a linear way but it did. Yours will too. @Happy2Heal also had terrible insomnia and her sleep retuned. You will get through this. Rest when you can. Even lying in bed and watching your breath is healing to the body and restorative.
 

I have had every symptom you described. I know when you are in the thick of it you feel that your case is the worst and that you can’t possibly continue to live like this. I just want to tell you that you can. When people on this site tell you it gets better they are right. You MUST hang on to that, even if you don’t believe it. Each time you think you cannot go on any longer, you remind yourself that you can. I am so much better than I was. You will get there too. 
 

Warm wishes, HC ❤️
 

 

Thank you so very much, I deeply regret, I did not write back on time. 
I like to do so much, but I am absolutely disabled to do so, it makes me so very sad! 
Stay in Touch! 🌹Warm Wishes C65

[Caesar65]

3 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

 

I would too, if I were you Caesar65.......just decrease now, rather than abandon completely.

 

Try blender concoctions in the morning.  I get my spinach, blueberries, sometimes a banana(leave out if constipated now), blended up with cranberry juice, sometimes yogurt.......sometimes kefir and that is great first thing in my day.  Seems to keep me real regular too.

 

With the lavender oil I'm seeing so frequently recommended orally so much lately.......Just start sparingingly.  A drop in a glass of water and only drink 1/2 your first trial.  Or diffuse it, into the air.  I've seen the article cited and again......this is WD.  With no ready or easy cure- all. 

Start low, go slow.  As so many of us ARE sensitive to so much.  Just saying and reiterating.

You might benefit from just a little and it's worth a trial, as so many of your symptoms are more activated......cortisol awakenings, going into fear states and scared so much.......

 

Nice to see everyone stopping by.  I sure appreciate as I think Caesar65 does too.  💜

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

Hi my dear! Once again my best thankfulness for your messages, it seems to me, you are a well experienced man who knows how to get through this neverending nightmare. 
And of course, that was what I was waiting for, that I get the advice to reduce again. 

Many thanks to you and Alto! 🌹
Today I used my syringe again, that I didn’t use anymore while taking this 1 drop of Lex. ( 1 mg ) But sometimes I think, maybe the pills would be better than the liquid concentrate drops, who are much stronger, am I right? 

But I did take a reduced dose of 0,5 mg already 2 weeks ago, and everything went worse, before and after this. 
It was absolutely horrible with extreme anxiety, inability to fill out a form etc, absolutely no clear thinking, but all these symptoms I always have anyway, but this time more extremely. 
And I hope this time it will not develop in same worse direction again. 
My aim is I want to stop, I never ever wanted to touch this drug again, I went through the horrible times ever since I stopped Lexapro more than a year ago, it’s almost 13 months now that I stopped, but much to rapidly. After 18 years! Still can’t believe it.
 

But I need to get my sleep back, I did not sleep at all since this whole April ! 
I am always awake, there is no sleep at all. 
 

Best wishes to you! 🌹C65
 

 

[Catina7]

@Caesar65  You WILL heal.  Keep reminding yourself of that!  It WILL get easier, just hang in there.  Don't let these awful drugs defeat you!!!  

[Caesar65]

9 hours ago, Altostrata said:

do you get 4-6 hours of sleep per night?

 

10 hours ago, Caesar65 said:

but how long should I take it?! 

 

It depends. We need daily symptom notes to answer these questions. It would help if you would stop taking your drugs irregularly and experimenting with others.

Once again, I thank you very much for your advice! 🌹 

No, I don‘t get any sleep per night, not at all, I am only in between, and fully awake. 
 

But I only try to reach my sleep pattern back, I didn’t sleep since this whole April, I am always awake, I never ever had this kind of insomnia before. It drives me crazy. 
I take herbal products with melatonin, valerian and hop.
And this didn’t help so I went to pharmacy and they recommended this Hoggars Night ( Doxylamin ) and it didn’t bring me to sleep either, I am totally awake all night long! 
And I only took it twice, because the day after my consciousness was extremely disabled, brain fog worse, and totally drowsiness. I mentioned it in my list. 
But please understand me, I am looking for a way to get to sleep. 
What would you recommend? 
 

 

 

[manymoretodays]

Caesar65,

Check that bottle of escitalopram concentrate please and report back what it says as far as milligrams of escitalopram in millileter(s) if more than one.

I just want to make sure you are not using a concentration of 20mg per each 1 mL.  Which is what some do get in the European countries.  Yours, if the equivalent of 1 mg per each 1 mL, should be okay, if this is what it is. 

Just check. 

 

For reinstatement purposes, no.....no advantage to using a pill form or solid form that I know of.

 

Careful with all those supplements now.  You may be really sensitive.  If you don't see them in the first  post in the link I'll give you, then type them in the search box in symptoms and self care.

Important topics about tests, supplements, treatments, and diet

 

Try every tip possible in this topic too, other than adding in too much more new, or anything..... while you are getting regular with the 0.5 mg dose of escitalopram.

Tips to help sleep

 

Type positive......like this sure stinks yet a light in this tunnel is coming soon, I just know it is.

Or oh......I'm going to try this......completely non-drug or supplement herb thingy......or I tried it and I got a moment of relief.  Corny.....but it just may help.  Try it to balance.

 

I can't tell if you are abandoning reinstatement completely or not.  Tomorrow I would try 0.5 mg at your established time.  Do a note, or diary note too then.......the official kind.  Note what you force feed yourself in the morning too, to the right of the time.

If 0.5 mg is completely freaking you out when the time comes to take it, then just take 0.25 mg or likely the best you'll be able to get is 0.2 mg if your concentration is equivalent 1 mg in each 1 mL and you only have a syringe that measure in increments of .02 mL.  That would be okay too.  You'll stay with it unless those notes/diaries clearly indicate you are worse or you are absolute on feeling like this is all worse than even before you tried.  Be alert for any improved times of day and get those in the notes/diaries.  Expect them!

 

And hang on Snoopy.  The cartoon dog.  You're going window soon......I can feel it, at least for a bit of time in a day or a whole day.  And you will sleep again.  Do some art.  Write zany poems.

 

Best.  L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Edited April 25, 2023 by manymoretodays
edited in a bit more after 6 or so minutes

[Altostrata]

12 hours ago, Caesar65 said:

What would you recommend? 

 

I have already repeatedly suggested decreasing to 0.5mg escitalopram.

[Caesar65]

5 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

I have already repeatedly suggested decreasing to 0.5mg escitalopram.

I did already reduce to 0,5 mg, I wrote you yesterday.

My question was about getting ability to sleep back. 
I  can’t sleep anymore since this April, not at all. Already before my sleep pattern developed worse, but since more than 2 weeks it’s impossible to sleep. 
Never ever had that before. 
I am always awake😩

Nothing helps, no herbal stuff, just nothing. 

 

[Caesar65]

17 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

Check that bottle of escitalopram concentrate please and report back what it says as far as milligrams of escitalopram in millileter(s) if more than one.

I just want to make sure you are not using a concentration of 20mg per each 1 mL.  Which is what some do get in the European countries.  Yours, if the equivalent of 1 mg per each 1 mL, should be okay, if this is what it is. 

Just check. 

The bottle says 20 mg concentrate per each ml! 1 drop is 1 mg Escitalopram.

Thank you, but what about this now?

I take now like you and Alto recommended since yesterday again O,5 mg with a syringe ( 1 drop in water solution ) And I am grateful for your messages and advice. 

 

[Altostrata]

We recommend an oral syringe rather than a dropper, which can be inaccurate.

[manymoretodays]

3 hours ago, Caesar65 said:

The bottle says 20 mg concentrate per each ml! 1 drop is 1 mg Escitalopram.

Thank you, but what about this now?

I take now like you and Alto recommended since yesterday again O,5 mg with a syringe ( 1 drop in water solution ) And I am grateful for your messages and advice. 

 

You haven't been taking too much then. 

Yesterday how much mL did you take?  If you added the drop to more water, than you would need to know the total volume of the drop + water, and then take half of it to get a dose of 0.5 mg.

 

Package insert's:

Cipralex which is the same as escitalopram, different brand name

Then another 20mg per 1 mL that is branded as Lexapro oral solution, also still escitalopram

 

They both say that 1 drop then is 1 mg.

With a 20 mg per 1 mL of volume concentration, then 1 mg is only 0.05 mL.

That's going to be hard to measure, and you only want 0.5 mg for your dose now.

 

Also: 

Pay good attention to when I type mL or mg

mL is volume

mg is referring to the dose basically, the dose strength.

 

I am going to try to explain how you can get a 0.5 mg dose for tomorrow and the next day more accurately than with using the dropper that is attached to the little bottle.
 

You'll need a little glass container that you can cover, protect from light, and keep cool.  A little shot glass or baby food jar would work for example.

And a 1 mL syringe.

 

You'll probably have to carefully remove the attached lid with dropper in it too, from your medicine bottle,  and try not to spill too much. 

 

First, measure out 9.5 mL of water and put it in your little container.  Then add 0.5 mL of your medicine.

Now you have 10 mg in 10 mL of water. 

So to get a dose of 0.5 mg you can just take 0.5 mL

 

Best to discard I think after 4 days, so we do have a little wastage of medicine.  Discard it then safely.  And remix.

 

Does that sound doable?  I hope so.  It will be better, more accurate than using the dropper thing they give you.

 

( Caesar, I think I got most of the mL's color coded, and mg's bolded.....I missed a few at the beginning and cannot get editing back to do those.  Also, don't forget to do your daily note/drug and symptom diary with times to the left)

 

 

Edited April 25, 2023 by manymoretodays
in ( )

[Caesar65]

1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

We recommend an oral syringe rather than a dropper, which can be inaccurate.

23th April 23

0730 a.m. "woke up" very exhausted, with anxiety, weakness, 

0800  a.m. Lexapro 0,5 mg anxiety, heart palpitations, debilitated,

1430 p. m. lunch still strong anxiety, still heart palpitations but less, weakness, drowsiness, feeling unreality, state of confusion, no concentration, great forgetfulness; kognitive disorder; debilitated; joylessness; brain fog

1800 p.m. teatime Omega Capsule, Magnesium, still heart palpitations;

2000 p.m. dinner anxiety better, but the other symptoms remain,

2300 p.m. herbal capsul with melatonin 

0100 a.m. going to bed but can't sleep at all/several times WC,

0330 a.m. still being awake all night, feeling exhausted, weakness

 

 

24th April 

0730 a.m. „woke up“ totally exhausted and tired, anxiety, weakness

0800 a.m. Lexapro 0,5 mg, feeling debilitated, kognitive disorder, anxiety, 

heart palpitations but not strong 

1100h a.m. breakfast, being confused, no concentration, anxiety, extreme feeling of inability to make decisions ( always!!)  

1430 a.m. lunch kognitive disorder, great forgetfulness, total lethargic 

1800 a.m. teatime magnesium, 

2000 a.m. dinner Omega Capsules

2300 a.m. herbal capsule with melatonin

0030 a.m. going to bed but not feeling tired, no sleep all night / several times WC 

0345 a.m. still being awake, no sleep, exhausted, brain fog 

0530 a.m. still awake, totally exhausted and tired, brain fog, 

 

 

[Caesar65]

22 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

 

You haven't been taking too much then. 

Yesterday how much mL did you take?  If you added the drop to more water, than you would need to know the total volume of the drop + water, and then take half of it to get a dose of 0.5 mg.

 

Package insert's:

Cipralex which is the same as escitalopram, different brand name

Then another 20mg per 1 mL that is branded as Lexapro oral solution, also still escitalopram

 

They both say that 1 drop then is 1 mg.

With a 20 mg per 1 mL of volume concentration, then 1 mg is only 0.05 mL.

That's going to be hard to measure, and you only want 0.5 mg for your dose now.

 

Also: 

Pay good attention to when I type mL or mg

mL is volume

mg is referring to the dose basically, the dose strength.

 

I am going to try to explain how you can get a 0.5 mg dose for tomorrow and the next day more accurately than with using the dropper that is attached to the little bottle.
 

You'll need a little glass container that you can cover, protect from light, and keep cool.  A little shot glass or baby food jar would work for example.

And a 1 mL syringe.

 

You'll probably have to carefully remove the attached lid with dropper in it too, from your medicine bottle,  and try not to spill too much. 

 

First, measure out 9.5 mL of water and put it in your little container.  Then add 0.5 mL of your medicine.

Now you have 10 mg in 10 mL of water. 

So to get a dose of 0.5 mg you can just take 0.5 mL

 

Best to discard I think after 4 days, so we do have a little wastage of medicine.  Discard it then safely.  And remix.

 

Does that sound doable?  I hope so.  It will be better, more accurate than using the dropper thing they give you.

 

( Caesar, I think I got most of the mL's color coded, and mg's bolded.....I missed a few at the beginning and cannot get editing back to do those.  Also, don't forget to do your daily note/drug and symptom diary with times to the left)

 

 

Dear mmtodays! 

I am so disabled because of my symptoms, and having no sleep anymore, that I hardly can write anything, or do anything even I urgently want to do! I

It has become very unbearable today, the last 2 days when I reduced, since Monday, it was even much more "better", than I am  today. I can´t think clearly, I am not able to do any simple things, I walk around, and am not able to decide whether I go now, or what I want to do. My brain seems not functional anymore, and now at this late time almost 2300hrs p.m. German Time, I feel my heart beating very hard, and heart palpitations start again. 

 

[Caesar65]

1 hour ago, Caesar65 said:

Dear mmtodays! 

I am so disabled because of my symptoms, and having no sleep anymore, that I hardly can write anything, or do anything even I urgently want to do! I

It has become very unbearable today, the last 2 days when I reduced, since Monday, it was even much more "better", than I am  today. I can´t think clearly, I am not able to do any simple things, I walk around, and am not able to decide whether I go now, or what I want to do. My brain seems not functional anymore, and now at this late time almost 2300hrs p.m. German Time, I feel my heart beating very hard, and heart palpitations start again. 

 

I edited my message, an now it is gone! Because of exceeded time!

I was taking so much effort, wanted to explain how I did the measuring method! And it took me almost an hour to write all this, now it is gone, oh my god!

 

[LostInCanada]

16 minutes ago, Caesar65 said:

I edited my message, an now it is gone! Because of exceeded time!

I was taking so much effort, wanted to explain how I did the measuring method! And it took me almost an hour to write all this, now it is gone, oh my god!

 

I feel so bad for you. 

 

On 4/25/2023 at 2:50 PM, manymoretodays said:

First, measure out 9.5 mL of water and put it in your little container.  Then add 0.5 mL of your medicine.

Now you have 10 mg in 10 mL of water. 

So to get a dose of 0.5 mg you can just take 0.5 mL

manymoretodays just wants to make sure you are being accurate and not taking too much. Is this the method you use?

[manymoretodays]

17 minutes ago, Caesar65 said:

I was taking so much effort, wanted to explain how I did the measuring method! And it took me almost an hour to write all this, now it is gone, oh my god!

 

Looking forward to reading, whenever you get a chance for a redo.

Give me what the label says on your "herbal + melatonin" too.  What those ingredients are.  ]

When you can.

 

1 hour ago, Caesar65 said:

and am not able to decide whether I go now, or what I want to do.

Meantime......There, there Caesar65.  Don't go now.  The best is yet to come.  This is no doubt one of the toughest things you'll ever encounter.

I don't know about you, but when I break to tears, or begin to cry......it always releases something for me, that was so stuck and so miserable.

 

Try:  The Healing Song

 

Morning will come.  Hang on.

 

[Caesar65]

On 4/25/2023 at 11:50 PM, manymoretodays said:

They both say that 1 drop then is 1 mg.

With a 20 mg per 1 mL of volume concentration, then 1 mg is only 0.05 mL.

That's going to be hard to measure, and you only want 0.5 mg for your dose now.

 

Also: 

Pay good attention to when I type mL or mg

mL is volume

mg is referring to the dose basically, the dose strength.

 

I am going to try to explain how you can get a 0.5 mg dose for tomorrow and the next day more accurately than with using the dropper that is attached to the little bottle.
 

You'll need a little glass container that you can cover, protect from light, and keep cool.  A little shot glass or baby food jar would work for example.

And a 1 mL syringe.

 

You'll probably have to carefully remove the attached lid with dropper in it too, from your medicine bottle,  and try not to spill too much. 

 

First, measure out 9.5 mL of water and put it in your little container.  Then add 0.5 mL of your medicine.

Now you have 10 mg in 10 mL of water. 

So to get a dose of 0.5 mg you can just take 0.5 mL

 

Best to discard I think after 4 days, so we do have a little wastage of medicine.  Discard it then safely.  And remix.

 

Does that sound doable?  I hope so.  It will be better, more accurate than using the dropper thing they give you.

 

( Caesar, I think I got most of the mL's color coded, and mg's bolded.....I missed a few at the beginning and cannot get editing back to do those.  Also, don't forget to do your daily note/drug and symptom diary with times to the left)

 

 

Dear MMtodays, my answer follows, hopefully not disappearing again, but awfully probably not that detailed as I wrote before. 

So this answer is just a very short draft. 

And I am deeply touched by so many people who to write me, this is absolutely wonderful. I am so much grateful for your help, dear MMtodays. But because of my strong kognitive disorders I am not able to write back on time, even though I think about it all day long. 

 

Until now I used a small measuring glass with a maximum of 20 ml capacity. I filled it with water of 10 ml. Then with the dropper I put just 1 drop inside, and with a syringe of a capacity of 1,0 ml I filled

5 x with the solution, which should be 0,5 ml. So I was told by the pharmacy.  

And I was convinced to get a dose of 0,5 mg.

Have I done this (almost) correct? Please tell me. 

To remove the dropper,  seems to be not possible, I am scared to break it, and how would I get a dose out of the bottle? Should I put the needle of the syringe inside the bottle? 

 

I have great difficulties in clear thinking, finding the right words when I speak, and the great forgetfullness, this is not me! I don´t feel myself anymore, and the heavy difficulties to make decisions, I waste a lot of time with it, it is so much restricting me. Also writing takes a long time, usually this was fluently. 

This kognitive stuff is developing worse, more than before. 

And no sleep at, absolutely not, never ever had such a longtime insomnia before! 

 

Best but sad wishes to you! Caesar65

And I like to say Thank you for all the messages!

 

 

[Catina7]

I know you feel like you're going to be like this forever but you're not!  Keep fighting @Caesar65.  You just need time for your body to figure things out and stabilize.  At some point your body will sleep.  Do you have a therapist that can help you through some of this?  Try to find as many coping skills that you can.  Write down things that can help you endure so you don't feel so hopeless.  There are many things that can help to calm and soothe us like guided meditation, EFT tapping, acupuncture, massage, etc.  I hope you can expand your resources so it gives you hope to keep fighting as best as you can.  

[Caesar65]

24 minutes ago, manymoretodays said:

Give me what the label says on your "herbal + melatonin" too.  What those ingredients are.  ]

When you can.

This can be done quick, I take Lunalaif Combi Depot with golden poppy, hop and 1,9 mg Melatonin, but didn´t help, and I try it with changing to Dr Boehm Sleeping Plus contains 1 mg Melatonin, Hop and Valerian. I try to go to sleep now, but I am still very awake.

Since 2300h p.m. I felt extreme anxiety with massive heart beating and heart palpitations. Now it has become less, but anyway no feeling of well being at all. Don´t remember, how this once was, a good feeling, it was a long time ago. Thank you for everything. 

[manymoretodays]

15 hours ago, Caesar65 said:

Until now I used a small measuring glass with a maximum of 20 ml capacity. I filled it with water of 10 ml. Then with the dropper I put just 1 drop inside, and with a syringe of a capacity of 1,0 ml I filled

5 x with the solution, which should be 0,5 ml. So I was told by the pharmacy.  

And I was convinced to get a dose of 0,5 mg.

Have I done this (almost) correct? Please tell me. 

To remove the dropper,  seems to be not possible, I am scared to break it, and how would I get a dose out of the bottle? Should I put the needle of the syringe inside the bottle? 

 

This ^ appears okay to me.

If you had 1 mg(as they say should be in 1 drop) in 10 mL

And then took half of that, or 5 mL ( 5 times a full 1 mL syringe)

You did it.  Approximated a 0.5 mg dose.

 

To remove the dropper you might need to pry up the the dropper attached at the top of the bottle really carefully to pull it off.

I think you could put the needle of the syringe inside the bottle to draw up your medication, unless.....the needle is too short to reach the fluid in the bottle.

 

Thanks for getting the dose change in your signature Caesar65.  So today marks day 4 of the reduced dose.

 

Any sleep?  Brief periods of improvement?  Feeling calmer overall times that last for more than 1 hour?

 

Edited April 27, 2023 by manymoretodays

[manymoretodays]

16 hours ago, Caesar65 said:

I take Lunalaif Combi Depot with golden poppy, hop and 1,9 mg Melatonin, but didn´t help, and I try it with changing to Dr Boehm Sleeping Plus contains 1 mg Melatonin, Hop and Valerian. I try to go to sleep now, but I am still very awake.

 

See if you can get ahold of a single ingredient Melatonin, and try even less than 1 mg.  Many do okay with much less.

Steer clear products with combinations, especially right now.

Melatonin for sleep

[Caesar65]

25th April 23: 
0730 a.m. „woke up“ totally exhausted and tired, 

0800 a.m. Lexapro 0,5 mg, feeling debilitated, kognitive disorder, heavy heart beating,  drowsiness = in German: Benommenheit 

1100h a.m. breakfast, being confused, no concentration, anxiety, restlessness 

1430 p.m. lunch kognitive disorder, great forgetfulness, drowsiness , restlessness 

1800 a.m. teatime magnesium, 

2000 p.m. dinner Omega Capsules

2300 p.m. herbal capsule with melatonin

0030 a.m.going to bed but not feeling tired, no sleep all night / several times WC 

0250 a.m. still being awake, no sleep, exhausted,

0530 a.m. still awake, totally exhausted and tired, but no sleep! 

 

26th April 23: 

0700 a.m. „woke up“ totally exhausted, 

0800 a.m. Lexapro 0,5 mg, feeling debilitated, no clear thinking, weakness

1000 a.m. heavy heart beating, no clear thinking, drowsiness, confused 

1400 p.m. lunch anxiety, no concentration, heart palpitations , weakness, restlessness 

1800 p.m. teatime Omega Capsules, 

2000 p.m. dinner, no concentration, restlessness 

230O p.m. heavy heart beating with palpitations and extreme anxiety /  herbal capsule sleep with melatonin 1,9 mg, being a little tired, but awake 

0050 p.m. going to bed / no sleep all night / 2 times WC

0400 p.m. still awake, totally exhausted 

0540 p.m. still awake! 
0630 p.m. still awake 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Caesar65]

7 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

 

This ^ appears okay to me.

If you had 1 mg(as they say should be in 1 drop) in 10 mL

And then took half of that, or 5 mL ( 5 times a full 1 mL syringe)

You did it.  Approximated a 0.5 mg dose.

 

To remove the dropper you might need to pry up the the dropper attached at the top of the bottle really carefully to pull it off.

I think you could put the needle of the syringe inside the bottle to draw up your medication, unless.....the needle is too short to reach the fluid in the bottle.

 

Thanks for getting the dose change in your signature Caesar65.  So today marks day 4 of the reduced dose.

 

Any sleep?  Brief periods of improvement?  Feeling calmer overall times that last for more than 1 hour?

 

Absolutely no sleep anymore since the whole  month! 
There are no feelings of well- being, so joyful emotions, there is no ability to talk to people, in a charming way anymore, you know what I mean, I am totally without any positive emotions, it like I am emotional totally numb. Unbearable, and I always regret that so much, that I am not able to enjoy anything. I feel calmer after I was in hot pool or so, for a while, but actually there is no real feeling of good mood, nothing. 

But for how long should I take this repeatedly reduced doseof 0,5 mg.

And I am very scared, if I decrease to 0,25 or less what will happen then. 

Thanks for your messages! Best wishes to you!