Sonia009: Citalopram discontinuation/reinstatement

[Altostrata]

@Sonia009 please notify @bunchesofoats or other moderators when you post your daily notes as requested. Until then, the staff won't be able to assist you any better than our Mentors such as @mstimcand other members.

 

If you haven't taken a look at the effects of the blood pressure drug, you should. You may be worrying about withdrawal when it's something else entirely.

[Farm24]

On 2/7/2024 at 11:46 AM, Sonia009 said:

Hi, I am not improving, dizzy, muzzy head again today, all day. I'm four and a half weeks into reinstating 0.5mgs Citalopram, not sure if I should continue, increase or stop. My urine is ok, not showing hyponatremia.  Please could a moderator advise. Thank you.

I think we have very similar issues, did you also have clear urine? I had that on Lexapro also.  It was ALWAYS clear.  No matter if I drank or not.  I also had the heavy body feeling and I think they are related. I suspect some sort of POTS issue that came from withdrawl.  I also had these issues on the meds, so I feel like my case is a little different. I really messed myself up

[Farm24]

12 minutes ago, Farm24 said:

I think we have very similar issues, did you also have clear urine? I had that on Lexapro also.  It was ALWAYS clear.  No matter if I drank or not.  I also had the heavy body feeling and I think they are related. I suspect some sort of POTS issue that came from withdrawl.  I also had these issues on the meds, so I feel like my case is a little different. I really messed myself up

But my BP seems to have finally stabilized and my urine is now normal.  

 

I just got the heavy body feeling back after using magensium for a few days. I thought that was long gone.  So I cut that out.  I go between muscle tension and this heavy body feeling so I do think they are related. 

[Sonia009]

On 2/24/2024 at 4:42 AM, Sonia009 said:

@bunchesofoatsHi, thanks for thinking about me. I think the ramipri l is going ok but giving me some aches and pains particularly my neck, but for the last few days my dizziness has been worse, maybe it's a side effect and maybe some withdrawal from the bendroflumethiazide making it worse. I've been on my 0.5 mg reinstatement for almost seven weeks now, sometimes I wish I had never reinstated. Prior to the last few days I had a lovely two hour window when I felt normal and symptom free. It gave me hope but when I got up the next day my dizziness was worse and has been so for a few days now. It's so disheartening, I had a bit of a panic attack yesterday with palpitations, still getting some anxiety, weepy, head fullness, tinnitus, occasional nausea and occasional brain zap. My extreme tiredness have passed.

Hope you are doing ok too, I know you have your own challenges. Thank you for caring.

@bunchesofoatsHi, I'm sorry to burden you with my problems when I know you have your own. I did respond to your kind enquiry in February but I heard no more from you, I hope you are well. It seems that I am getting mixed views from people,  these are that it's Citalopram withdrawal or BP medication side effects. I stopped my BP medication a few days ago, I am keeping check on my bp and it is normal. Unfortunately my symptoms are very much the same as before. A new symptom for me is racing thoughts that are making it difficult for me to rest at night. I feel certain it is to do with withdrawal, I guess I need reassurance because then I know what an am dealing with. If you could reply that would be great, I would prefer one moderators opinion that is yours because you have helped me in the past, other peoples views are confusing me. I understand totally if you are unable to respond. Thank you.

[bunchesofoats]

On 3/2/2024 at 1:56 AM, Sonia009 said:

I stopped my BP medication a few days ago, I am keeping check on my bp and it is normal.

This is great. Even if your symptoms didn't alleviate, it's great that they haven't gotten worse, while you've managed to eliminate an extra medication that was adding complexity to the situation.

 

On 3/2/2024 at 1:56 AM, Sonia009 said:

Unfortunately my symptoms are very much the same as before.

It's great to hear that your symptoms aren't getting worse.

 

On 3/2/2024 at 1:56 AM, Sonia009 said:

A new symptom for me is racing thoughts that are making it difficult for me to rest at night.

For me, even when I am not particularly experiencing withdrawal, I may have this symptom. I remember telling my doctor about it who actually laughed and said it doesn't make sense that if I'm so tired my mind is racing. I've had troubles with this since I was 12.

 

My first line of defense is paying attention to my breath. There are a few ways to do this, and I will cycle through different ways because that's what my brain needs. The simplest is to think "in" on the in breath and "out" on the out breath, and keep repeating for as long as you can. Another technique I've found really useful is the 4-7-8 method: breath in for a count of 4, hold the breath for a count of 7, breath out for a count of 8. If you do this, you are likely to notice your body and mind feeling differently.

 

How is your dizziness? Are you taking any medications or supplements besides the 0.5mg citalopram at this point?

[Sonia009]

@bunchesofoatsHi, thanks for replying, hope you are feeling better. It can't be easy listening to other people rant on about their problems if you don't feel well yourself.

The racing thoughts come and go, usually at night just as I'm dropping off to sleep. I didn't have any last night. This could be anxiety though because I have been feeling very anxious and a little depressed lately. Having said that, today has been a little better, I've felt a tad brighter.

Thanks for the breathing tips, I'll try it out. I'm still getting dizziness, on and off throughout the day, I worry about it and I think it makes it worse. I'm trying to follow the Claire Weekes method of facing, accepting, floating and letting time pass, just in case it is anxiety related. I bought her book.

I have experienced withdrawal before and my symptoms were similar then, that is why I believe I have withdrawal symptoms and probably anxiety symptoms too. I have used the withdrawal checklist for symptoms that is shown here on this site and I have many of them.

I'm still only taking 0.5 mg Citalopram, I think I have completed 8 or 9 weeks now. I feel a little light headed shortly after taking it, maybe I should take it in the morning rather than 4pm, not sure.

I'm not taking any supplements, I tried magnesium a while back but I think I had symptoms with it so stopped, I seem to be sensitive to meds.

This whole thing started when I cold turkeyed from 5.2 mg Citalopram and then went through several med changes in a short space of time, as outlined in my signature.

I still take an anadin extra before bed because I think it helps.

I have to add that my home life has been stressful, my husband is going through withdrawal and reinstatement too and he has other health issues and insomnia, this has had an affect on my health. So good to get this off my chest, it's good to have someone to talk to who understands. All the best and thank you for your support.

[bunchesofoats]

On 3/3/2024 at 12:58 PM, Sonia009 said:

I feel a little light headed shortly after taking it, maybe I should take it in the morning rather than 4pm, not sure.

This is interesting. I also at times feel a bit light headed just after taking my dose, and I wonder if that means I could be going faster. I don't think it does, which is why I keep moving slowly. But it does show the sensitivity we have to this medication. I take my dose at bedtime.

 

On 3/3/2024 at 12:58 PM, Sonia009 said:

I'm trying to follow the Claire Weekes method of facing, accepting, floating and letting time pass, just in case it is anxiety related.

I have seen her work highly recommended and have used her processes in the past, though I haven't read her books.

 

On 3/3/2024 at 12:58 PM, Sonia009 said:

I still take an anadin extra before bed because I think it helps.

I know this is hard to give up, but if you could, I would find a caffeine-free substitute, and/or take it earlier in the day. If it's a tablet that you can split, perhaps splitting to make the change more gradual is an option.

 

On 3/3/2024 at 12:58 PM, Sonia009 said:

I tried magnesium a while back but I think I had symptoms with it so stopped, I seem to be sensitive to meds.

At some point, I would try a high quality magnesium supplement again - something like Magnesium Aspartate. There are many forms and some are much more bioavailable than others. The least bioavailable forms act as laxatives since the body can't absorb them.

 

I take this supplement at bedtime, and I take this one midday. As with anything I take, I worked my way up slowly.

 

On 3/3/2024 at 12:58 PM, Sonia009 said:

I have to add that my home life has been stressful, my husband is going through withdrawal and reinstatement too and he has other health issues and insomnia, this has had an affect on my health.

I am sorry you are dealing with major life stressors on top of bodily symptoms. I can relate, and it becomes very difficult to take care of my health when things combine just right. You're doing a great job keeping track of how you're feeling and what you're doing, as well as trying new methods of anxiety and stress relief. You're on the right track, keep at it.

Edited March 5 by bunchesofoats
added specificity

[Sonia009]

3 hours ago, bunchesofoats said:

This is interesting. I also at times feel a bit light headed just after taking my dose, and I wonder if that means I could be going faster. I don't think it does, which is why I keep moving slowly. But it does show the sensitivity we have to this medication. I take my dose at bedtime.

 

I have seen her work highly recommended and have used her processes in the past, though I haven't read her books.

 

I know this is hard to give up, but if you could, I would find a caffeine-free substitute, and/or take it earlier in the day. If it's a tablet that you can split, perhaps splitting to make the change more gradual is an option.

 

At some point, I would try a high quality magnesium supplement again - something like Magnesium Aspartate. There are many forms and some are much more bioavailable than others. The least bioavailable forms act as laxatives since the body can't absorb them.

 

I take this supplement at bedtime, and I take this one midday. As with anything I take, I worked my way up slowly.

 

I am sorry you are dealing with major life stressors on top of bodily symptoms. I can relate, and it becomes very difficult to take care of my health when things combine just right. You're doing a great job keeping track of how you're feeling and what you're doing, as well as trying new methods of anxiety and stress relief. You're on the right track, keep at it.

@bunchesofoatsHi, thanks for your encouraging reply. I will try weaning off the anadin, maybe I'll take just half a tablet with a half paracetamol tablet and see how that works, I want to avoid caffeine withdrawal symptoms. I'll try the magnesium you recommend too. I hope all is going well for you, thank you for your continued support.

[Sonia009]

Dr Mark Horowitz just appeared on daytime tv in the UK, This Morning, ITV 1, talking about Pregabalin. I think he was on for less than 10 mins but that's a start. He was joined by two people, one currently on 400 mg for pain but wanting to come off, the other who had reduced from 250 mg to 10 mg for anxiety. 800.000 people in the UK are taking it. The one who was down to 10 mg said she needs to take her dose at the exact same time each day, if she doesn't she gets pins and needles, sweats, nausea, vomiting, headaches, balance issues, chills and dizziness. Dr Horowitz said people are trapped on drugs with withdrawal effects and they become physically dependent on these drugs. He describes the drugs as selling cars without brakes. Advice was to speak to a good doctor about weaning off very slowly over months or a year to avoid withdrawal effects including suicidal feelings, trembling etc. It was emphasised that the lower doses are more difficult to come off, it becomes harder and harder. Very interesting, wish it could have been a longer slot.

[OffPills]

1 hour ago, Sonia009 said:

The one who was down to 10 mg said she needs to take her dose at the exact same time each day, if she doesn't she gets pins and needles, sweats, nausea, vomiting, headaches, balance issues, chills and dizziness.

Horrible! 
 

The more this topic gets exposure the better! Thanks for sharing.

[HelenR]

2 hours ago, Sonia009 said:

Dr Mark Horowitz just appeared on daytime tv in the UK, This Morning, ITV 1, talking about Pregabalin. I think he was on for less than 10 mins but that's a start. He was joined by two people, one currently on 400 mg for pain but wanting to come off, the other who had reduced from 250 mg to 10 mg for anxiety. 800.000 people in the UK are taking it. The one who was down to 10 mg said she needs to take her dose at the exact same time each day, if she doesn't she gets pins and needles, sweats, nausea, vomiting, headaches, balance issues, chills and dizziness. Dr Horowitz said people are trapped on drugs with withdrawal effects and they become physically dependent on these drugs. He describes the drugs as selling cars without brakes. Advice was to speak to a good doctor about weaning off very slowly over months or a year to avoid withdrawal effects including suicidal feelings, trembling etc. It was emphasised that the lower doses are more difficult to come off, it becomes harder and harder. Very interesting, wish it could have been a longer slot.

@Sonia009 it was great to get something on the telly with real people talking about their experiences. More needs to be done and Doctors need educating.

[Sonia009]

7 minutes ago, HelenR said:

@Sonia009 it was great to get something on the telly with real people talking about their experiences. More needs to be done and Doctors need educating.

@HelenR Couldn't agree more. Hope you are still in your window.😊

[Sonia009]

56 minutes ago, OffPills said:

Horrible! 
 

The more this topic gets exposure the better! Thanks for sharing.

@OffPillsYes I agree. Maybe more interviews with him will follow after this, hopefully.

[Sonia009]

On 3/5/2024 at 3:06 PM, bunchesofoats said:

This is interesting. I also at times feel a bit light headed just after taking my dose, and I wonder if that means I could be going faster. I don't think it does, which is why I keep moving slowly. But it does show the sensitivity we have to this medication. I take my dose at bedtime.

 

I have seen her work highly recommended and have used her processes in the past, though I haven't read her books.

 

I know this is hard to give up, but if you could, I would find a caffeine-free substitute, and/or take it earlier in the day. If it's a tablet that you can split, perhaps splitting to make the change more gradual is an option.

 

At some point, I would try a high quality magnesium supplement again - something like Magnesium Aspartate. There are many forms and some are much more bioavailable than others. The least bioavailable forms act as laxatives since the body can't absorb them.

 

I take this supplement at bedtime, and I take this one midday. As with anything I take, I worked my way up slowly.

 

I am sorry you are dealing with major life stressors on top of bodily symptoms. I can relate, and it becomes very difficult to take care of my health when things combine just right. You're doing a great job keeping track of how you're feeling and what you're doing, as well as trying new methods of anxiety and stress relief. You're on the right track, keep at it.

@bunchesofoats Hi, hope you are ok. Just an update, last Thursday I had upset stomach and I almost fainted three times. I went to A&E 2am Friday and spent 18 hours there, bloods, urine,ecg, abdominal x-ray, full head and body scans. What showed up was dehydration and slightly low iron levels, two small gallstones and a harmless fibroid. They think my bp may have dropped too low and one doctor thought it was mostly stress related. he also acknowledged that symptoms were common side effects of Citalopram. They haven't prescribed any meds but gave me meds for nausea and dizziness only whilst there. I was told to eat and drink more because I've lost so much weight. I have not taken Citalopram for two days, I'm not taking any meds at the moment. The day after I went visiting for the first times in months but was really tired. Today I am still feeling the dizziness. I was dizzy whilst reinstating citalopram so I'm wondering whether I should stay off it and ride the symptoms and perhaps take a prescribed medication for the dizziness. I have two previously prescribed meds at home, cyclizine and betahistine. Any thoughts please?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Sonia009]

On 3/10/2024 at 8:55 AM, Sonia009 said:

@bunchesofoats Hi, hope you are ok. Just an update, last Thursday I had upset stomach and I almost fainted three times. I went to A&E 2am Friday and spent 18 hours there, bloods, urine,ecg, abdominal x-ray, full head and body scans. What showed up was dehydration and slightly low iron levels, two small gallstones and a harmless fibroid. They think my bp may have dropped too low and one doctor thought it was mostly stress related. he also acknowledged that symptoms were common side effects of Citalopram. They haven't prescribed any meds but gave me meds for nausea and dizziness only whilst there. I was told to eat and drink more because I've lost so much weight. I have not taken Citalopram for two days, I'm not taking any meds at the moment. The day after I went visiting for the first times in months but was really tired. Today I am still feeling the dizziness. I was dizzy whilst reinstating citalopram so I'm wondering whether I should stay off it and ride the symptoms and perhaps take a prescribed medication for the dizziness. I have two previously prescribed meds at home, cyclizine and betahistine. Any thoughts please?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

@bunchesofoats Hi, I decided to go back on 0.5 mg, hope I'm doing the right thing.

[HelenR]

1 hour ago, Sonia009 said:

@bunchesofoats Hi, I decided to go back on 0.5 mg, hope I'm doing the right thing.

@Sonia009 sorry to hear of your ordeal , it must have been scary. I hope things improve for you soon and you can start eating. Last year when I was very poorly I had similar things. Low blood pressure, dizzy spells, loss of weight etc. The only thing I found that helped over the months was sticking to 3 small meals a day, not adding any other meds to the mix and that included vitamins as I couldn't tolerate them. Gradually I improved, my blood pressure stabilized once I managed to eat and drink lots of water.

This year I had a set back and I blame it on adding antibiotics and anti sickness medication after I had COVID. I am still in a reasonable window, I've had a few weird days here and there but overall I feel lucky.

You will get there albeit slowly. If I was you I would not take any meds apart from your citalopram and other life saving meds like Levothyroxine etc but try as hard as you can to stay clear of other meds as they all interact in some way or other.

 

 

1 hour ago, Sonia009 said:

@bunchesofoats Hi, I decided to go back on 0.5 mg, hope I'm doing the right thing.

 

[Sonia009]

5 minutes ago, HelenR said:

@Sonia009 sorry to hear of your ordeal , it must have been scary. I hope things improve for you soon and you can start eating. Last year when I was very poorly I had similar things. Low blood pressure, dizzy spells, loss of weight etc. The only thing I found that helped over the months was sticking to 3 small meals a day, not adding any other meds to the mix and that included vitamins as I couldn't tolerate them. Gradually I improved, my blood pressure stabilized once I managed to eat and drink lots of water.

This year I had a set back and I blame it on adding antibiotics and anti sickness medication after I had COVID. I am still in a reasonable window, I've had a few weird days here and there but overall I feel lucky.

You will get there albeit slowly. If I was you I would not take any meds apart from your citalopram and other life saving meds like Levothyroxine etc but try as hard as you can to stay clear of other meds as they all interact in some way or other.

 

 

 

@HelenRThanks Helen your message is very reassuring. Happy for you that your still in your window, looking good🙏😊. I'm continuing with the Cit 0.5 mg, 9 weeks already is too long a time to give up on. Not taking anything else. Eating has picked up, I'm making more of an effort, drinking lots of water. Thanks for your support.👍

 

[HelenR]

40 minutes ago, Sonia009 said:

@HelenRThanks Helen your message is very reassuring. Happy for you that your still in your window, looking good🙏😊. I'm continuing with the Cit 0.5 mg, 9 weeks already is too long a time to give up on. Not taking anything else. Eating has picked up, I'm making more of an effort, drinking lots of water. Thanks for your support.👍

 

@Sonia009 I'm happy to hear you are managing to eat and drink more. Let's hope things will slowly improve. I remember thinking everyday that I would never feel normal again. It may have taken me a few months but at last I'm there. I can honestly say I don't think I'll ever get to 100% recovery but I can function enough to work part time and help my mum and dad on a weekly basis. Anything other than that will be a bonus. I get tired very quickly and have days of feeling off balance with an odd symptom of a peculiar head but I can live with that. I'm just lucky to have survived this far as last year I wanted to die!!!

There is hope , keep on doing what your doing however tedious and you will get there.

[Sonia009]

26 minutes ago, HelenR said:

@Sonia009 I'm happy to hear you are managing to eat and drink more. Let's hope things will slowly improve. I remember thinking everyday that I would never feel normal again. It may have taken me a few months but at last I'm there. I can honestly say I don't think I'll ever get to 100% recovery but I can function enough to work part time and help my mum and dad on a weekly basis. Anything other than that will be a bonus. I get tired very quickly and have days of feeling off balance with an odd symptom of a peculiar head but I can live with that. I'm just lucky to have survived this far as last year I wanted to die!!!

There is hope , keep on doing what your doing however tedious and you will get there.

@HelenRThanks Helen, you're doing great and your words are comforting to me and a anyone else reading I'm sure.🙏😊

[bunchesofoats]

On 3/10/2024 at 12:55 AM, Sonia009 said:

What showed up was dehydration and slightly low iron levels, two small gallstones and a harmless fibroid

Dehydration will always magnify both physical and psychological symptoms. I make it as easy for myself as possible by keeping lots of water around, having a large assortment of herbal teas, flavored unsweetened sparkling water, apples, oranges, celery.

 

On 3/10/2024 at 12:55 AM, Sonia009 said:

wondering whether I should stay off it and ride the symptoms and perhaps take a prescribed medication for the dizziness. I have two previously prescribed meds at home, cyclizine and betahistine. Any thoughts please?

 

22 hours ago, Sonia009 said:

I decided to go back on 0.5 mg, hope I'm doing the right thing.

Yes, I think this is the right move. My guess is the medications for dizziness would not help with the specific withdrawal-induced dizziness. The only thing that will help is allowing the body time to adapt and heal. Your job is to provide the best possible conditions for the body to do what it needs to do.

 

I know you mentioned you had an adverse reaction to taking magnesium supplements. Have you tried using epsom salts on the skin as another way of getting magnesium? I don't have a bath, so I use epsom salt shower scrub and an epsom salt moisturizer.

[Sonia009]

1 hour ago, bunchesofoats said:

Dehydration will always magnify both physical and psychological symptoms. I make it as easy for myself as possible by keeping lots of water around, having a large assortment of herbal teas, flavored unsweetened sparkling water, apples, oranges, celery.

 

 

Yes, I think this is the right move. My guess is the medications for dizziness would not help with the specific withdrawal-induced dizziness. The only thing that will help is allowing the body time to adapt and heal. Your job is to provide the best possible conditions for the body to do what it needs to do.

 

I know you mentioned you had an adverse reaction to taking magnesium supplements. Have you tried using epsom salts on the skin as another way of getting magnesium? I don't have a bath, so I use epsom salt shower scrub and an epsom salt moisturizer.

@bunchesofoatsThanks for replying and for your advice on staying hydrated. I'll look online for the Epsom salt moisturizer, worth a try. I had a head scan so I know all is ok but these weird head feelings are scary. All the best.😊

[Sonia009]

On 3/12/2024 at 11:28 AM, Sonia009 said:

@bunchesofoatsThanks for replying and for your advice on staying hydrated. I'll look online for the Epsom salt moisturizer, worth a try. I had a head scan so I know all is ok but these weird head feelings are scary. All the best.😊

@bunchesofoatsHi, I'm thinking of coming off 0.5 mg Citalopram because I feel worse after taking it. I think it's making me constipated also. I cannot see any improvement, I have no life. How should I do this, does the 10% rule still apply and how long should it take? Thanks.

[Sonia009]

Hi, has anyone experienced the feeling of extreme weakness, like you cannot stand up for long? I seem to be going through that for a few days. Just wondering if It's another withdrawal symptoms or a reinstatement symptom even. Thanks.

[mariamisery]

For the past month.  I feel really tired and weak.  Don't want to do anything. I was on mirtazapine for almost 7 weeks. Been in recovery for 2 months. Does yours last the whole day?

[Sonia009]

@mariamiseryHi, pretty much lasts all day but I'm lying down a lot and notice it when I get up and start moving. I feel on the verge of fainting sometimes. I checked my bp and it is ok. How would you describe your feelings of weakness?

[mariamisery]

It lasts most of the day. When it is happening If I walk upstairsI get heart palpitations.  I am sitting on bed in misery.  My movement slows down and sometimes feel like I want to pass out. Apparently all our bodily sensations centers around our nervous system. My bp is good  too. Your body will probably go through so many symptoms before it's over. Is this your only symptoms 

[Sonia009]

@mariamiseryHi, no so many symptoms, anxiety spike early morning, fast heartbeats, tiredness, tinnitus, headaches, ear fullness, loss of appetite and weight, dizziness, constipation, noise sensitivity, blurry eyes, the usual stuff that comes and goes. I had weakness and near fainting last weekend, went to A&E, ECG, blood tests, head and body scan, x ray, all ok.😕

[mariamisery]

I know how that is when everything checks out fine but your body has gone crazy. So you reinstated your  med.  I am sure that your problems is link to withdrawal and reinstatement.  How long will you do this?

[Sonia009]

@mariamiseryHi, I reinstated 0.5 mg around 10/11 weeks ago. There has been no real improvement, sometimes I feel worse when I think back. This weakness thing is relatively new to me, louder tinnitus and hearing sensitivity worse too.

I am seriously thinking about stopping reinstatement and face withdrawal. The symptoms are similar in any case.😊

[mariamisery]

I don't really understand tapering and reinstatement.  It seems that the longer u take the meds it does further harm. You are right they all come with painful side effects.  Have there been times when you feel well?

[Sonia009]

@mariamiseryCan't remember the last time I felt well, I think I had a brief window about a month ago but it only lasted an hour or so. How about you?

[mariamisery]

At some point during the day I have a small or medium window but not me feeling completely normal.  11 months is a long time to go through this. You are so strong.  I want this over with soon. 2 months is long enough to suffer.  This process is so difficult. 

[Sonia009]

It's been 11 weeks for me since reinstating. I know a window is a good sign but one that lasts a day or two would be a more encouraging sign. What will you do, bear it out or have you thought of reinstating?

[Dahlia50]

@Sonia009

I have that weekness feeling, cannot stand up for long.
You did a reinstatement, after how long off? Thinking about it but hesitant as long into WD and not sure if it helps or makes it worse. I'm having a hard time. No life. Does anyone have waves with a sense of intensity and pulsating chemical pressure? Now I also have insomnia, body goes into overdrive at night.

[mariamisery]

Mirtazapine always made me feel awful.  I was on it for depression but depression went away. My symptoms are centered around just feeling bad without knowing what the bad feeling is. I am sorry. You did say 11 weeks. I will bear somehow. If I reinstate I will feel bad just like now. How long are u reinstating for? What is helping you to get through?

[mariamisery]

Can u describe the pulsating chemical?