☼ Wildflower0214 Effexor WD and PTSD

[Wildflower0214]

Hey there... POTS is actually a form of Dysautonomia and it is a lot more complex then just the heart rate and fainting...etc. I have a friend who also has it and her symptoms are almost like WD but she's never taken any pharm drugs that would cause it.

 

I was not on meds when I was diagnosed. I got a diagnosis at 16 and was put on meds at 23. They had me on a beta blocker for the POTS at 16 and tried to give me Paxil, as they use AD to "treat" POTS! Lol I refused the Paxil, thank God.

 

I have always wondered if the POTS was going to come around to kick me in the butt, and if I'm honest, I'm shocked it has actually taken this long to show back up. But, I had a messed up nervous system going into WD, so I'm sure WD is not helping whatsoever.

 

I drink water like a horse and eat a lot of salt. I was kind of a pro at coping with my symptoms prior to meds. I didn't hve symptoms while on AD really, well, I did but they were better.

 

I used to do Gatorade to help, but can't tolerate it now.

 

I'm sorry you had to deal with it, it's crappy and at times really frightening.

[btdt]

Why do they think you had it at 16 what is the cause? Or is this on more thing that is not understood well. I just happened to think of the bp issue I seem to keep having now when I read your post thought maybe something along these lines is what is causing my bp fluctuations now... for some reason it seems to go wonky for a time then levels out.  I don't seem to see a cause other then illness I have been sick a lot. Portal hypertension... ya could be that too.. there is never any serious hard answers in my case my family doc said if my liver doc doesn't smarten up .. we will look for a replacement. I guess it could be a lot of things.  

 

Have you tried the baby pedialyte I could not tolerate the adult version or gator aid when I needed it... both made me sick .. not a fan of the taste of the baby one either to tell the truth. It is very sweet... more a chug it down and get it over with. 

peace

[Wildflower0214]

Yes, it can cause BP fluctuations.

 

I was dizzy

Nearly passing out upon standing

Nearly passing out in the shower

Unable to stand for long periods of time

Having heart rate of over 150 many times just from standing up

Had excercise Intolernace

Easily dehydrated

Exhausted all the time

Needed over 10 hours a night to even function at all

Having to take naps

Had brain fog

[AliG]

 It's funny or sad, how so many of us suffer similar things. I have " supraventricular tachycardia",  and I never put it together , with drug W/D until now.  It makes me so angry.  I also have POTS.   Oh , the joy!!

[Wildflower0214]

Messed up my flipping meds!!!!!! Fantastic!!!!

[luv2knit]

Oh no, WF. What happened?

[Wildflower0214]

I ended up forgetting to take my last dose at 9:30pm

And only remembered to take it at 1:30am this morning. So I'm technically going to end up taking 7 doses today instead of the normal 6.

 

I don't know if I should leave a dose off of today to make it the normal 6. I feel like a coked up manic mess and I don't know what to do. I have a history of a paradocical reaction to this med and I don't know what would be the wisest decision. It has had an over stimulating affect before and that is what It feels like now.

[luv2knit]

Oh no! I can't answer that! I will pray for wisdom, though!

[Wildflower0214]

Thank you. Xo

[luv2knit]

You're welcome

 

XOXO

[Wildflower0214]

Yesterday, I ended up forgetting to take my last dose at 9:30pm And only remembered to take it at 1:30am this morning. So I'm technically going to end up taking 7 doses today instead of the normal 6.

 

I don't know if I should leave a dose off of today to make it the normal 6. I feel like a coked up manic mess and I don't know what to do. I have a history of a paradoxical reaction to this med and I don't know what would be the wisest decision. It has had an over stimulating affect before and that is what It feels like now.

Any mod have an opinion? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

[SelmaLady]

Oh wonderful.  I've surely done that more than once!  I just picked up where I normally was, that is, I didn't skip a dose just let it ride out.  A couple of weeks ago I forgot my Doxepin dose at night and didn't take it until 9:30 the next morning---had to take it close to my Zoloft dose too.  But I did take the Dox at its regular time that evening.  I do believe tho that it caused a cascading effect that is causing some of the wave I'm having now.  I just was worried that if I didn't take it, it would be like a "mini-withdrawal".   I'm so so sorry that it causes the manic affect, WF.  That must be awful to get thru.  Another reason why we want we OFF this crap!  Praying hard that this won't have any ongoing effects.  Love you.

[Wildflower0214]

Oh wonderful. I've surely done that more than once! I just picked up where I normally was, that is, I didn't skip a dose just let it ride out. A couple of weeks ago I forgot my Doxepin dose at night and didn't take it until 9:30 the next morning---had to take it close to my Zoloft dose too. But I did take the Dox at its regular time that evening. I do believe tho that it caused a cascading effect that is causing some of the wave I'm having now. I just was worried that if I didn't take it, it would be like a "mini-withdrawal". I'm so so sorry that it causes the manic affect, WF. That must be awful to get thru. Another reason why we want we OFF this crap! Praying hard that this won't have any ongoing effects. Love you.

Yes, mania sucks!!! It's a horrendous experience. Feel like I just stuck street drugs up my nose!!

 

So sorry Selma! I remember when that happened to you!!! So crappy... I decided to knock a dose off because I have a paradoxical reaction to the Ativan, and having that additional dose at 1:30am has made me nuts!!! We never have good choices, just have to choose the least crappy one. Lol I want off this stuff so badly! I know you do as well. Did you dose down? I've been praying for you. Love you lots. Hugs.

[Altostrata]

 

Yesterday, I ended up forgetting to take my last dose at 9:30pm And only remembered to take it at 1:30am this morning. So I'm technically going to end up taking 7 doses today instead of the normal 6.

 

I don't know if I should leave a dose off of today to make it the normal 6. I feel like a coked up manic mess and I don't know what to do. I have a history of a paradoxical reaction to this med and I don't know what would be the wisest decision. It has had an over stimulating affect before and that is what It feels like now.

Any mod have an opinion? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

 

 

You must mean the Ativan? This is a question for Skyler. You may feel odd for a few days because of the error.

[Wildflower0214]

Ok, yes the Ativan. Thanks for taking the time to reply.

 

Skyler has helped me navigate, so I made a decision I hope turns out well.

 

Thanks again.

[AliG]

How are you now, W.Flower?  I hope you're doing better. Thank you for your caring message on my thread.   Hugs.  Ali.

[Wildflower0214]

Hey there Ali, well, it's 2:30am and I am wide awake and burning. So, not better.

 

Thanks for checking in on me.

 

I will stop by and catch up on your thread as soon as I get out of this craphole. Until then, my prayers are with you. Hugs.

[AliG]

 Ahh 2.30 am  !! I know it well. Been there too -  all too often.  Seems never ending, I know.   Not much happening on my thread - can't seem to write anything at present.   Thinking of you, and hoping you come out of the "craphole" soon. Hugs.

[luv2knit]

I was right there with you--just not online!

 

Prayers!

 

XOXO

[Wildflower0214]

Ya, 2:30am!! So sorry you guys are familiar.

 

Such horsecrap!!!! Ugh!

 

 

Anyways, I don't know whether this is because of PMS or my dose miss circus, but I have this guilt OCD that is back. And it's awful. It's been one of the most crippling symptoms because I have a compulsion to go back and try to "fix" every single thing I've done wrong in the last ten years. It's horrendous.

 

I pray it stops. It's really really hard to cope with

[luv2knit]

So sorry, WF. Yeah--hard to cope!

[direstraits]

yeah,OCD can be torture-(((WF)))

[bluebalu86]

Hi honey, I'm in the crapper too. Hope we feel better soon. Hugs

[Wildflower0214]

DS, yes, it stinks. Thanks for dropping by. Xo

 

BB, I know you are sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I don't post much on many peoples threads because I have some weird anxiety thing, it makes me nervous. Who knows why.... But I have read a lot of your thread. I know you are suffering and I am so very very very sorry. Hang in there! Praying for you, for us all. Xo

 

 

So, it just keeps getting weirder and weirder. This may be TMI, if so, I'm sorry. I changed period pads because I wanted to use some without chemicals as I had read that they can disrupt hormones and I know I prob have PCOS, so I've been trying to limit my exposure to environmental toxins. I used one of the new pads today and now my genitals hurt, almost like I feel like I am having cystitis again. Maybe it was the pad, maybe the missed dose days ago, who knows. But this just plain stinks. Holy potatoes (I'm trying not to cuss anymore) this really stinks. If it isn't one thing it is always another. When does it end? When does the endless train of poo stop? This is tiring.

[luv2knit]

WF--Do you have burning anywhere else? After being gone for months, my burning came back a couple of months ago, and every square inch of my body burns--including "down there". At first I thought I had a UTI or something, but I finally figured out it was just part of the allover burning.

[Wildflower0214]

WF--Do you have burning anywhere else? After being gone for months, my burning came back a couple of months ago, and every square inch of my body burns--including "down there". At first I thought I had a UTI or something, but I finally figured out it was just part of the allover burning.

Ummm, I have had the burning all over before. And I have it now, well it's on the backs of my arms and other places. But this was burning throbbing pain down there. I changed back to the other pad and it seems to have helped. I thought the burning was over, but it came back from the missing the Ativan dose. I wonder if I will ever even back out again. Most people speak of making mistake and then they return to baseline. That's not how this works for me. I screw up and then my baseline changes. Things do eventually settle, but the baseline seems forever changed. Like back in April when I had that emotional trigger. I started having adrenaline cortisol rushes, and I still have them, even now. They never went away. It stinks.

[luv2knit]

Yeah, the burning had been gone for me for months, and came back for no apparent reason.

 

I know my cortisol is through the roof, because my thyroid levels and blood sugar levels are off too. (From what I read, they are connected, and before this, they were pretty consistent.). Again,no reason for the massive change. Two months ago, my fasting blood sugar at home was 78. At the doctor a few weeks ago, it was 97. I'm afraid they are going to diagnose me diabetic and try to put me on meds before this is done with!

[Wildflower0214]

Well.... ZERO sleep. I have no words

[AliG]

 It never ceases to amaze me, the variety  of symptoms, we experience. Also, the massive changes in "bodily function" that occurs.  Cortisol, blood sugars, hypertension, diabetes, thyroid, heart  problems, weight gain or loss , (endocrine), Sleep issues, body jerks , burning , spasms, pins & needles........ The list goes on .   It is the "ultimate torture".  Only "we" can understand.   Thank "god" we can help each other , through this.   Hang in there, W.F.   We're all with you.  Hugs.

[luv2knit]

So sorry, WF Prayers.

 

Ali, you are so right. It's crazy!

 

XOXO

[AliG]

Crazy, for sure. I know I'm going to be up all night , again!!    I have no words , either.    At least now , we know.  This makes it easier, in my mind.  We know what we're dealing with.

[Wildflower0214]

 

I know...it's all a mess Ali and Luv. I keep trying to find words to describe the horror that floats in and out of my everyday existence, but I cannot seem to be able to articulate any of it accurately.

 

I know there are some here who so eloquently describe their struggles and it appears to help them. It does not help me. Articulating the depths of what I go through does nothing but cement it into reality and force me to deal with something, an experience that I simply cannot handle.

 

Largely, I find mindfulness to be very useful. But when I am suffering this way I think distraction and some degree of denial is necessary for my survival. Hopefully, it won't be like this very long.

 

As far as symptoms go, I'm still concerned about not being able to vary my diet. I also have noticed my urine to be darker during the night when I get up to go to the bathroom.... Which concerns me. But, I feel like so many things really fluctuate throughout this, that getting a blood work up would be a cause for alarm when there is a possibility it is nothing. I have seen a pattern here with people when they get tested for hormones, blood sugar, cortisol, ..... Etc. that these test results are sometimes not consistent. And, if anything, show a system in rapid flux swinging from one end of the spectrum to another, trying to find some sort of balance.

 

I am also getting migraines. Yesterday, it started around 3pm and went into the early morning... Maybe until 3am. And, in some off hand sort of way, I can still feel it waiting to return.

 

I also had some random rash on my arm yesterday. Who knows why....

 

I can't even talk about all the other things I deal with...it's just too much.

 

 

Again, I wish, for the sake of others that I could be more detailed in my journey through this, but as I said.... Listing specifics about this only seems to cause me more trauma. I often wonder if I will be able to even write a recovery story or if I will just fade away and run in the other direction once I have some degree of healing. I would like to think that I could leave behind something useful for someone else.

 

Before all of this, I would have forced myself to write a detailed account of all of this despite the emotional price to be paid. I would have done it out of a sense of obligation and probably to some degree a need for approval from others about my willingness to share. But, not anymore. I'm not that person anymore. I realize now that I am responsible for my own health and well being and that boundaries are important. And all I can say honestly at this point in time is that if I feel that I can write a recovery story or document here during this without it causing me harm, I will. And if I don't feel I can do it, I won't. Im done with the days of sacrificial giving at the expense of my own sanity and health. And, I think this is probably a good thing.

[luv2knit]

WF--This is pretty much me right down the line. As far as the darker urine is concerned, are you drinking enough water? Could you be dehydrated?

 

XOXO

[Wildflower0214]

Luv, I'm glad Im not the only one who feels this way. As for the other, I drink too much water, always have because of the POTS. I go through probably five 32oz bottles a day. Lol And it just changed all of the sudden. I guess I will just watch it and see what happens.

 

I'm on my way over to catch up on your thread. XOX

[luv2knit]

Hmmm... Yes, watch and see.

 

Getting ready to update now.

[AliG]

 Have you had your blood sugar tested lately, Wild?  I'm thinking I need to do this as well, as I have signs of diabetes and/or insulin resistance. The problem is I also have "procrastination". LOL.