bluebalu86 Posted July 13, 2015 Share Posted July 13, 2015 Can she go to the hospital ONLY to stop the meds she's on right now? Without taking new ones? If she says she doesn't want to be drugged further, will they respect that, or if she's in the hospital under their care they do whatever they think is "best" to "treat" her? I don't want Faith to get any worse than she is right now. She is really struggling and in severe distress. Her condition is fragile and delicate and should be dealt with with extreme consideration and caution. I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment
Hopefull Posted July 14, 2015 Share Posted July 14, 2015 Faith, you have the right to choose for your self. We live in 21st Century. No one can force you to take more medication. I wish you all the best. Hopefull. DRUG HISTORY: November 2013- Zoloft, ( Bad reaction). January 2014 - March 2014 Seroquel.( Quit Cold Turkey). January2014- Mirtazapine, I was taking 15mg at one stage, reduced to 7.5mg, Pgad reactions to Mirtazapine. Doctor kept increasing it to 37.5mg, until July 2014. No improvement, experiencing panic attacks, on 37.5 mg. I had enough by October 2014. Began tapering. October 2014- Started tapering Mirtazapine from 37.5mg. September 2015- Down to 4mg of Mirtazapine. Crashed. September 16th- Up dosed to 5mg. Held this dose for almost 5 months. Stabilised. February 2016- Began tapering again. From 5mg to 4.5mg of Mirtazapine. (Rocking the boat, again)! Lol. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Fresh Posted July 14, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted July 14, 2015 I think Blue is right . . . anyone admitted to hospital can refuse medication , but a voluntary admission can be changed to involuntary if the doctor sees fit. Once the admission is involuntary a patient can be forced to take medication prescribed by the treating doctor. In Australia , the definition of "a danger to self or others" is used to hold and medicate patients against their will under the Mental Health Act. Any change Faith? Have things settled at all? 1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg 2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months. July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months. Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg. October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive. March 2016 , 21mg Link to comment
bluebalu86 Posted July 19, 2015 Share Posted July 19, 2015 Hi Faith, are you there? Where are you? How are you doing? I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment
Adagiooo Posted July 22, 2015 Share Posted July 22, 2015 Faith, wishing with all my might you find some way out of this mess. I know you are suffering terribly and I hoping that somehow you can untangle all meds you're on, taper and begin to find some relief. Sending you healing energy and peace of mind. XOXO and many, many ((((((hugs)))))). 2001-04 Polypharmacy to include Paxil,Celexa, Risperdal, Seroquel, Depakote, Ambien, Geodon, Valium, Ativan, Haldol 03/04-11/04 Abilify 11/04-05/07 CT Abilify Non symptomatic 6/07 took Valium, began to experience altered reality and physical symptoms of withdrawal from Valium. 07/08. Abilify 2 mg, 12/08 Abilify 1 mg, 03/09 Abilify 0 mg, 03/08-06/11Altered reality but fully functional 10/12 hospitalized, Invega Depot, 2 shots discontinued, severe insomnia 6/14-10/14 flexeril, discontinued, developed insomnia; 10/14 10 mg Doxepin I week, no help with insomnia; 10/14 Remeron for two days, paradoxical reaction Present Risperdal 1mg, clonazepam 2 mg, Restoril 15 mg. Went from .5 to 1 to 1.5 to 2mg of clonazepam in 2014. Also in 2014, tapered from 2 mg risperdal to 1.5 (fairly slowly but still too fast) and had to up dose back to 2 mg. Got liquid risperdal and started from 2 mg again. Link to comment
bluebalu86 Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Has anybody heard from Faith? I'm worried about her. Faith, are you there? I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment
oskcajga Posted August 7, 2015 Share Posted August 7, 2015 I am honestly wondering what happened to Faith at this point. Anyone have any idea? Link to comment
bluebalu86 Posted August 7, 2015 Share Posted August 7, 2015 I'm very worried about Faith too. I hope she's alright. Maybe she went to the hospital? I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment
Pugknows Posted August 9, 2015 Share Posted August 9, 2015 We invest so much time and love and caring for people on this forum. It's awful when they just disappear. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
johnson Posted August 9, 2015 Share Posted August 9, 2015 My guess is she ended up in the hospital. Hopefully I'm wrong though. Link to comment
AliG Posted August 9, 2015 Share Posted August 9, 2015 I've been wondering, too. I hope you're ok, Faith. Please let us know, how you're doing. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted August 9, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 9, 2015 Hope you are okay Faith. Just even a peep when you can......... Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 18, 2015 Author Share Posted October 18, 2015 God bless everybody. Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Martina23 Posted October 18, 2015 Share Posted October 18, 2015 Hello Faith, I was thinking about you some time ago. I was quite worried about you. How are you? Did you manage to reduce your medicine? 05/2013 Lyrica 100 mg / per day for pain + PGAD resulting from caesarian delivery11/2014 started to taper: 50 mg per day/ for one week then c/tafter one month reinstated at 50 mg /per days of 10 July 2015 drug free- symptoms OCD Link to comment
LucaDiProspero Posted October 18, 2015 Share Posted October 18, 2015 Faith so long...please give us an update sweet! March 2010/ October 2010: Sereupin 30mg a day, EN 15 drops a day October 2010/ 1st November 2014: Cipralex 50mg a day (tapered to 40mg a day in August 2013), EN 15 drops a day (switched to Lexotan 15 drops a day in September 2014) Started Risperdal 1mg a day on the 1st November 2014. Stopped Risperdal on the 23 November 2014 because that day, after a short mental crysis, I suddenly lost all my emotions,desires,motivation and they not come back yet. Stopped Cipralex C/T in December 2014. Added, tapered and stopped other drugs during the following months (also a voluntary hospitalization in January 2015 for a suicide attempt)...no changes yet. I'm med free from 3rd December 2015 Link to comment
bluebalu86 Posted October 18, 2015 Share Posted October 18, 2015 Faith! You're here! How are you doing? We've been so worried about you... I suffer from depression, anxiety, pure-o ocd, and panic attacks since 2004. Been on multiple different psychiatric drugs since 2006. Never had a significant WD problem before, only brain zaps for a month and then I'd be fine...............Been on Cipralex (escitalopram) 15 mg and Fluanxol (flupentixol) 1 mg since Sep 2014. Stopped taking the Cipralex after a fast 20-day taper.Took the last 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 5th, 2015. Then took Seroxat (paroxetine) 10 mg for a week, and stopped it too. Severe WD started suddenly on Feb 16th. RI 5 mg Cipralex on Feb 18th, 2015. RI worked and was relatively stable for a while................April 7 - decreased Fluanxol from 1 mg to 0.5 mg and took it at this dose for a week. - BIG MISTAKE; April 13 - WD starts creeping in; April 14 - RI full dose of Fluanxol 1 mg => severe muscle twitching and jerking when trying to relax and fall asleep, overwhelming sense of doom, dread, terror, and horror, insomnia, hoping to stabilize.Tried doing a 10% cut off Fluanxol in the end of May for a few days, but quickly updosed to full dose because the twitching returned.Experiencing waves and windows in the following months.Unsuccessful brief taper attempt of Fluanxol by 5% on November 1st. Symptoms hit the next day. Too scared to continue tapering, reinstate full dose.Severe crash in November after stupidly trying a barbiturate on November 9th. Grave mistake. Sense of unshakable inescapable internal torture, like my soul is in hell being tortured, terror/horror/dread/doom (probably akathisia?) that gets especially bad when trying to relax and fall asleep, muscles twitch, jerk and move on their own, shaking, insomnia, can't eat, confusion, disorientation, brain not working normally. Never felt so bad in my entire life. Never experiment with other meds while in WD! Praying to God I stabilize and get back to my baseline.December - things getting even worse. January - unbearable suffering Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 18, 2015 Author Share Posted October 18, 2015 Thank you for your kindness. I think I am getting worse...I don t know i am too sick to realize anything. God helped me and I went to chirch for what a very powerful prayer and also there were the relics of St Nectarios from Eghina island brought to our church and I could touch and pray to him. Imagine being tottally outside of reality, pain, not knowing where you ate, paranoid, shaking, mouth clenched head tight like rock, neck rock and convulsing, plain crazy but still being able to attend...God be praised...i couldn t recognize some people that once were probably good sweet friends and i was normal....i think severe depersonal and derealization , i cried so much some one of my friends cried woth me...nonody knows how to help, how can i survive this still i do mot know.....so sorry for my writing mistakes Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 18, 2015 Author Share Posted October 18, 2015 https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Nf_QCI3XvBA Read and pray to St Nectarios please, he is a miracle worker through whom God works and shows His love for us. May he help us all!!! Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Hopefull Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 Hi Faith, I am glad that you have decided to come back to SA. Sad to hear that you are still struggling! Are you Greek Orthodox? I am glad that your faith in God is helping you to keep going! Best wishes, Hopefull. DRUG HISTORY: November 2013- Zoloft, ( Bad reaction). January 2014 - March 2014 Seroquel.( Quit Cold Turkey). January2014- Mirtazapine, I was taking 15mg at one stage, reduced to 7.5mg, Pgad reactions to Mirtazapine. Doctor kept increasing it to 37.5mg, until July 2014. No improvement, experiencing panic attacks, on 37.5 mg. I had enough by October 2014. Began tapering. October 2014- Started tapering Mirtazapine from 37.5mg. September 2015- Down to 4mg of Mirtazapine. Crashed. September 16th- Up dosed to 5mg. Held this dose for almost 5 months. Stabilised. February 2016- Began tapering again. From 5mg to 4.5mg of Mirtazapine. (Rocking the boat, again)! Lol. Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 19, 2015 Author Share Posted October 19, 2015 My dear friends, i am so disabled and in such horrible state that is why I cannot come on the site....or do anything, forgive me and pray for me as I will pray for you I love you all even if i don t feel love and my world is dark and evil but this is not me, my husband and my priest told me I was a very very kind person. My husband said that this was the first thing he loved about me , kindness. So I was kind and normal... Many hugs and prayers for Blu, Adagioo, Jhonson, Hopefull, Luca, Altostrata, Skyler, Osk,Martina, manymoretodays, Ali, bdtd, and all of the other souls on this forum, forgive me I have not mentioned your names..... I will try to write again but I am very very disabled, deppresed, in pain, mental status changes every moment, shaking, neurologycal damage severe, cognition, neuro emotions out of my control, got to the hosp because of that and more, gave me some ativan, made an injection for my akathisia and dystonia and clenching and what not... Congentin injection, one dr wanted me in the hosp, the next day I was released that i am fine .... fine........maybe it is God s will to stay away from hospitals where they traumatized my body and soul.... Keep up the fight God bless Faith Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
grace2002 Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 Dear Faithbarelysurviving~ Please hold on! I am new here but have found much support and information. Foremost, I know I am not alone and that getting off these poisons is my path when many around me think I should "just go back on my meds" or "it's menopause" or "you can't come off these with your family history". Well guess what? I can and I will. It has been a rough, rocky road but I believe the windows show me I can and AM getting better. My brain is able to function well at times so it is on the mend. The waves tell me I need to slow down, take care of myself and quit beating myself up. This is going to take time but will be well worth it. Praying for you. I am so sorry for you all your pain. Medication History: 22 years of SSRI's, Zoloft 100 mg titrate up to 200 mg qd 20 years, to Cymbalta 60 mg qd 1.5 years, return to Zoloft 200 mg qd for few months then to Paxil 60 mg qd. Wellbutrin 150 SR qd added about 4 years ago. Increased to 150 SR bid a few months ago. Clonazepam 0.5 mg qd titrate up to 1.0 mg daily over 20 years. Have been supplementing with another .25 to .50 mg of clonazepam daily as needed for withdrawal symptoms to function at work. Taper History: DC'd Paxil after a short taper of alternating 60 mg and 30 mg for a few days, 30 mg qod for a few days to off when ran out 09/01/15. Current Medications: 10/5/15-Wellbutrin-SR 150 mg bid, clonazepam 1 mg hs and .25 - .50 mg during day prn to function at work with withdrawal symptoms. Supplements: Nutrilite Perfect Pack (multivitamin, minerals, phytonutrients, fish oil), probiotic, MSM 2 capsules daily and titrating up. MSM 4 capsules daily. Updated 11/17/2015. Other pertinent medical history: Major Depressive Disorder with anxiety, alcoholism in remission 13+ years. Former recreational drug user. Perimenopausal. Drug Interactions per Drugs.com: Moderate bupropion clonazepam Applies to: Wellbutrin XL (bupropion), clonazepam Excessive use of clonazePAM, or abrupt discontinuation following long-term use, may occasionally trigger seizures in patients taking buPROPion. Talk to your doctor before using these medications together if you have any questions or concerns. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor. No other interactions were found between your selected drugs. Link to comment
Martina23 Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 Faith, thank your God you are away from hospital. Sometimes the neglect of the doctors can be also blessing! Maybe your God wants to give you one more chance to come off these drugs in your own regie and properly ... 05/2013 Lyrica 100 mg / per day for pain + PGAD resulting from caesarian delivery11/2014 started to taper: 50 mg per day/ for one week then c/tafter one month reinstated at 50 mg /per days of 10 July 2015 drug free- symptoms OCD Link to comment
starburst Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 Faith you can do this. One day at a time. Remember the saying, 'how do you eat an Elephant?' 'one bite at a time'. Well I'm not in to eating Elephants but you get the meaning! Right now I am taking five minutes at a time, I can't focus on anything more than that. You have a strong faith. That is a blessing. God is more than able to help you where you are right now. Remember in Psalm 23 it says "Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me". God doesn't abandon us, he walks through those valleys with us. Take Care xx Link to comment
AliG Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 Faith, It's good to hear from you. I'm so sorry , that you've been through so much , lately. I'm pleased your faith is helping you through this. You will win this " battle". You have to try and " hang on" long enough to see some improvement , in your symptoms. At least then ,you will have some hope & belief , that you will heal. You will do better, in my opinion, if you can stay well away from Hospitals and Doctors , of any kind. They are not helpful, and only exacerbate the "withdrawal", without even knowing what they are doing . They are quite ignorant, as we all know. You don't mention your drugs. What is happening there ? Are you still tapering ? Are you tapering , at all ? I hope this starts to turn around for you soon, and that you start to feel a little better. It would be good for you, if you could stay around here for a while and get the help that you need , to get out of this situation that you are in. I hope that you do . Wishing the best for you , Faith. There are many here, who care about you, including me. Hugs, Ali. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 19, 2015 Author Share Posted October 19, 2015 Hello, I got to the hospital because I got very violent...God what have these things done to me???? Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 19, 2015 Author Share Posted October 19, 2015 It may still be the fast tapering from Buspar (not done with it yet ).....plus the protracted withdrawals from clonazepam and then valium two yrs ago, the seroquel they forced me to take in the hosp..... plus what I am taking now.....God they tried so many meds on me, so many, my brain is grossly malfunctioning, nervous system is damaged, nerve damage, severe akathisia, dystonya, sensory damage...everything....my dr. says no it is not the meds...derealisation, dp, etc etc.... No window of normality, only hell. No tapering since July Faith Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Martina23 Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 Poor Faith, to be honest I also now have quite a big anger wave. I hate to say I also feel violent inside but till now I could control it. I am also afraid that once might come situation when I would not be able to handle it properly and something happens. But on the drugs I felt even worse, as if I did not have control at all. We have to believe that we will survive it. It was not our fault that we got to this situation. And we cant control the outcome anyway. I hope you will feel better soon. 05/2013 Lyrica 100 mg / per day for pain + PGAD resulting from caesarian delivery11/2014 started to taper: 50 mg per day/ for one week then c/tafter one month reinstated at 50 mg /per days of 10 July 2015 drug free- symptoms OCD Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted October 19, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 19, 2015 Hi Faith and thank you for your blessings. Sending mother love for comfort. As well as prayers. And oh yuch.......the angry stuff has been by far the most difficult for me to acknowledge........never mind embrace. You ARE kind, smart, and beautiful. Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 19, 2015 Administrator Share Posted October 19, 2015 Faith, what drugs are you taking now? With dosages, please. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 19, 2015 Author Share Posted October 19, 2015 Hello Altostrata, Bupropion 150mg Escitalopram 15mg Clonazepam 1 mg x 3 times daily Buspar 5mg (that equals half of full 10mg tablet) plus 1/4of a full 10 mg tablet --in the morning Buspar 5mg plus 1/8th of a 10 mg tablet Trazadone 50 mg Gabapentin 300mg Baclofen 30 mg Carbamazepine 200 mg Propranolol 40 mg Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 20, 2015 Administrator Share Posted October 20, 2015 Did you tell the people at the hospital you were taking too many drugs, feeling bad because of that, and need to have them minimized? This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 Yes . One of the drs who saw me when I arrived said that "the experts" got to the conclusion I had conversion disorder and other personality disorder....that was while my staying 1 yr in the hospital at my drs' disposal...but she said I needed to be put on a form as I was in huge mental distress ( and neurologycal but nobody believes that) And all this happening while I was totally "gone" . The next dr. mocked me quietly so that he could not be heard...and sent me home. When my psychiatrist heard from me the story the best I could remember, he said: " well , you escaped!" He is a total incompetent and has the idea that I want to go to the hospital, as my refuge place....meanwhile I am crazy! I told him hospital is a no no even if I cease to exist... Whichever dr. looks into my file sees what this incompetent has to say and dismisses any complaint I have. My family dr included... I went to a neuropsychiatrist in London On, he surely read my file sent by my MD, same diagnosis.... I went to a neurologist in LondonOn, same thing. Faith... Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 20, 2015 Administrator Share Posted October 20, 2015 No matter what your diagnosis, you are taking a ridiculous number of drugs in an absurd combination. Anyone can see that. You need to tell the doctors you want to take the minimal amount of drugs, they're making you sick. If you are feeling unwell, you are still in the same position: Either you need to reduce the drugs yourself, or you need to find professional help doing so. We can't do much for you here if you're suffering adverse effects from drugs but not taking steps to reduce them. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 Hi Faith and thank you for your blessings. Sending mother love for comfort. As well as prayers. And oh yuch.......the angry stuff has been by far the most difficult for me to acknowledge........never mind embrace. You ARE kind, smart, and beautiful. Thank you manymoretodays I got myself in this hell, well I am paying still in hell . This is inhuman suffering, it is pure evil. I am so sorry for my negativity, it is torment Faith Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
Faithbarelysurviving Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 Reducing them myself, if possible and slowly, that is the plan God help me. Yes Altostrata, thank you for your concern and for still supporting me. I am wondering can it be lyme disease symptoms "covered up" by these and past meds? If I had my memory......to link pieces toghether... Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds -Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth -switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp -Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad, -changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!- -new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam -severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr -Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6, -Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc -Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb Link to comment
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