Hazel: struggling with Paxil to Prozac bridge

[Hazel]

Just wanted to do a quick update for Friday...

I continued with 6.5mg of paroxetine in the am and 2 mg in the pm for the second day.  Anxiety was up and down throughout the day, but no hydroxyzine.  I felt the best in the early afternoon till about 5:00pm when the anxiety would come and go.  Took a bath with Epsom salts before bed and slept well till about 4:00am and up with anxiety, but was able to fall back to sleep for a while.  Anxiety was there when I got up, but it is now 9:45am and am sitting out in the sun feeling pretty good.

[wantrelief]

11 minutes ago, Hazel said:

now 9:45am and am sitting out in the sun feeling pretty good.

Sounds lovely, Hazel.  I am hoping you keep getting more and more moments like this.

[Hazel]

Thanks @wantrelief.  It seems like the anxiety just comes and goes for no rhyme or reason throughout the day, but I am grateful for the moments of peace.  I hope you are getting some peaceful times as well?

[wantrelief]

1 hour ago, Hazel said:

I hope you are getting some peaceful times as well?

That is sweet of you to ask, Hazel. I usually feel a bit better at night, still not "normal" but better than the daytime.  They are moments I am grateful for as well.  

[Hazel]

Summary for Saturday:

continued with 6.5 mg in the am and 2 mg in the pm.

Anxiety was more consistent throughout the day with very little breaks.  It was mostly mild to moderate at about a 2-5.  Finally, in the evening around 6:00 or so I got a break and felt pretty good for the remainder of the night.  I slept well.  Up today around 5:00am with anxiety, but was able to fall back to sleep for a while.  

Up for good at 8:30 and took my 6.5mg dose.  Anxiety there, but not too bad, probably at a 2.  I am hoping today is better as dealing with anxiety all day is no fun, but I know it could be a lot worse.  

On the plus side, I went to my son’s baseball game yesterday and went to a get together at a friend’s house last night, so I am able to do the things I want despite feeling anxious.

[Rosetta]

Ahh, isn't that nice -- to be able to do things although you feel anxious.  I thought that time would never arrive.  Today I'm going out despite anxiety.  I know I'll feel better after I do.  So pleased that you are living life, Hazel!!

 

- R

[Hazel]

Thanks @Rabe, glad to hear you are getting out as well😊

[Hazel]

Sorry @Rosetta, that last comment was meant for you😊

[Rabe]

Wow Hazel!  The baseball game and time at your friends...that is so wonderful to hear!!!  Hope you are able to continue to capture moments like that!!!

[Hazel]

Update for Sunday:

8:30 6.5 mg paroxetine, anxiety 3-4

8:45 breakfast, anxiety 2

11:30 son’s baseball game anxiety anywhere from a 1-3

1:00 lunch, anxiety 2

2:00 anxiety 1-2

4:00 grocery shopping, anxiety 3-4

5:00 dinner, anxiety 1-2

6:00 anxiety 2

6:15 45 min walk

8:00 bath with epsom salts

9:30 bed slept okay until about 2:30 am, fell back to sleep, up around 5:00 with high anxiety 

6:30 up and getting ready for work, anxiety quite high, about an 8

8:00 breakfast, anxiety down to a 3 or 4

 

Feeling frustrated as I feel like I am getting worse again.  Not sure if it’s from taking hydroxyzine last Wednesday and this is rebound anxiety or from increasing to 9mg for 3 days and going back down to 8.5?  I am just so tired of feeling like this, and now I have to go to work.  I almost took a hydroxyzine this morning, but managed to hold off for now.

[Rosetta]

Sorry to hear you feel a bit worse.  Hugs!  Maybe work will distract you.

[Hazel]

Just going through my journal on paper and noticed for a little over a month now when it gets to be 5-6 days since I’ve taken hydroxyzine my anxiety gets really high.  Today is 5 days since my last dose, so I’m thinking that is a factor as to why I have such high anxiety today.  I am doing my best to stay away from it to hopefully make it out of this wave.  The longest I’ve gone over this period of time without taking it is 6 days, so we shall see.  It’s just difficult to work when feeling like this, so I end up giving in.

[Altostrata]

Hazel, do you keep your bedroom very dark, with blackout shades and curtains? Early morning light can add to anxiety.

 

As hydroxyzine has a half-life of maybe 24 hours, I suspect that pattern might be a coincidence. But if you want to take it every 3 days as an experiment, be sure to keep notes.

[Hazel]

I don’t have blackout shades or curtains.  Would that cause anxiety to be high all day?  

I will see how I do without the hydroxyzine as long as I can, but if things don’t improve I may try the experiment of taking it every 3 days.

[Altostrata]

Keeping the bedroom dark until after you wake up can reduce anxiety surges in the morning, which can start a cycle for the entire day.

 

You can also wear a sleep mask, but the combination of blackout shades and sleep mask is more effective. You want it to be very, very dark.

[Rabe]

Thinking bout you Hazel!!!!♥️

[Hazel]

Thanks @Rabe😊

 

Update for Monday 6/11:

8:30 6.5 mg paroxetine 

9:15 at work feeling anxious, 5-6

10:45 snack, anxiety still high 6-7

12:00 feeling high anxiety yet

1-3 low anxiety 1-2

3:30 feeling anxious again

5:00 home from work still feeling anxious 4-5

7:00 dinner anxiety 3-4

8:30 shower, feeling a bit better anxiety 1-2

9:00 2mg paroxetine 

10:00 went to bed, fell asleep fine, but up several times during the night and up for good around 4:30 with high anxiety. 

 

I managed to to get through yesterday without taking the hydroxyzine although it wasn’t easy.  Yesterday was a really tough day, so hoping today will be better.  Also, I ordered blackout curtains, so hopefully I will get them up soon!

 

[Carmie]

Hi Hazel, 

 

Just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you.

 

You’re doing a great job documenting your day. I’m happy to see that your anxiety isn’t too bad some of the time. That must be a relief for you. 

 

Hope those blackout curtains work. I must get some myself one day. I sleep now but only because I’m on Seroquel. I will eventually get severe rebound insomnia from it. I remember in the past I didn’t take it once it twice and I didn’t sleep AT ALL. Something to look forward to, not!😞

 

I hope today is better for you too💚

 

 

 

 

[Hazel]

Thanks so much @Carmie.  Today has been better than yesterday, but still a challenge.  It is a relief to have breaks from the anxiety, but unfortunately they are all too brief.  

I will let you know how the blackout curtains work.  They are supposed to arrive this Thursday.

[Rabe]

Hi Hazel!  Where did you get the black out curtains?  Grateful you are getting some breaks...even a small window still has a nice view...happy for you!!!

[Hazel]

Thanks @rabe, I ordered them from Target-only $40 for 2 pair.

[Hazel]

Update for Tuesday:

 

6:30 up to get ready for work, anxiety high-about a 6-7

7:45 breakfast, anxiety 4-5

8:30 6.5 mg paroxetine, feeling a bit better 

9:00 work, anxiety about 1-2

10:00 still feeling ok

10:45 snack.  Anxiety up a bit -2-3

12:00 lunch

12:15 short walk, anxiety 2-3

2:15 feeling better, anxiety 1-2

3:15 feeling more anxious, frustrated 5-6

5:00 dinner anxiety 2 

7:00 walk outside anxiety 2-3

7:30 son’s baseball game, anxiety 1-2

9:00 2 mg paroxetine 

10:30 bed, fell asleep okay, up around 4:00 with  high anxiety.  Fell asleep off and on and then out of bed at 7:15 today.

 

Having pretty high anxiety this morning.  I don’t feel there is anything I can do at this point but wait it out and hope I feel better over time.  It seems like I haven’t been doing as well since trying to increase to 9mg last week.  This is really frustrating.  I do feel overall I am better than I was since late April/early May, but still feel I am in the wave that started at the end of April.  This has to end at some point, right?

[Rosetta]

Yes, it will end.  It seems as if it won't and then it's suddenly bearable.  There has been a change in the brain and the whole system has to find balance again.  So frustrating, but I do believe it's a sign of healing.  Hugs! -R

[Hazel]

Thanks Rosetta.  The last few days have just been more of a struggle, so I tend to get discouraged.  Thanks for the encouragement 😊

[Rabe]

I agree Hazel...it is such a struggle but I too, when look back, am better than fall or winter...I think...so hold onto your progress and I can say you sure sound better! More accepting and hopeful and happier!  ♥️

[Hazel]

@Altostrata I am wondering if you know if taking hydroxyzine could prevent me from stabilizing on the paroxetine?

[Altostrata]

You mean take hydroxyzine occasionally for sleep? What size tablets do you have?

 

Have you been tracking your symptom pattern after taking hydroxyzine? You were worried about side effects.

 

It has a half-life of about 20 hours, you might feel its effects for a day or two.

 

Using search in the Symptoms and Self-Care forum can answer questions, see Hydroxyzine (Atarax, Vistaril)

[Hazel]

23 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

You mean take hydroxyzine occasionally for sleep? What size tablets do you have?

 

Have you been tracking your symptom pattern after taking hydroxyzine? You were worried about side effects.

 

It has a half-life of about 20 hours, you might feel its effects for a day or two.

 

Using search in the Symptoms and Self-Care forum can answer questions, see Hydroxyzine (Atarax, Vistaril)

I take it occasionally for anxiety when it gets bad-usually once or twice a week at 50 mg.  I feel more calm after I take it, but also really sleepy.  Last time I took 25 mg which helped but wore off after about 7 hours.  I just worry if I take it I am preventing my brain from stabilizing on the paroxetine.

[Hazel]

Okay, so I gave in and took 25 mg of hydroxyzine about 50 minutes ago and 10 minutes or so after I took it my anxiety got much worse.  I am freaking out now.  I suppose this is a paradoxical reaction?? I am so scared.  I hope this passes soon.  I just took it last Wednesday and it really helped to calm me down.  I just don’t get this.  I feel absolutely hopeless at this point that I will ever get relief.

[Rabe]

Have you felt anxious after it before Hazel?  

[Songbird]

It does sound like a paradoxical reaction.  I had the same thing happen to me with l-theanine.  It worked great for a few days, then suddenly turned on me.

You could try some calming relaxation exercises or gentle yoga.

[Hazel]

25 minutes ago, Rabe said:

Have you felt anxious after it before Hazel?  

No it’s always helped to calm me down in the past.  I’m guessing my system is just very sensitive now to anything and everything🙁

[Hazel]

3 minutes ago, Songbird said:

It does sound like a paradoxical reaction.  I had the same thing happen to me with l-theanine.  It worked great for a few days, then suddenly turned on me.

You could try some calming relaxation exercises or gentle yoga.

Thanks Songbird.  It sucks cuz it happened at work and I had to get through seeing 3 clients.  I am done now and will go home and go for a walk and try to do some things to calm me down like legs up the wall and deep breathing.  Did you recover soon after the l-theanine turned on you?

[Rabe]

Gosh Im sorry Hazel...our systems get so touchy!!! 😞Hope you feel better soon!!

[Songbird]

Hazel, what I have found is that when my system is relatively stable (only mild withdrawal symptoms) I am not sensitive to supplements and have very few problems with taking anything.  When my system is very destabilized it seems the risk of adverse reactions is much higher.  It makes sense when you think about it.  When your system is very out of balance, anything new that you add could upset the balance even more - the system is in an abnormal state, so it may not react to supplements in the normal way.  At one point in my taper I had a bad reaction to a cup of tea!  But I can drink tea without problems now.  So when in a bad wave, it's important to be very careful, be very gentle with your system.  When I was in a bad state, I gave up caffeine, alcohol, watching the news or any dramatic or suspenseful TV programs, and only read light-hearted books.

[Hazel]

28 minutes ago, Rabe said:

Gosh Im sorry Hazel...our systems get so touchy!!! 😞Hope you feel better soon!!

Thanks Rabe.  Feeling a little better now-drowsy, but not as anxious.  I really appreciate your support.