JesusSavemefromWD: only 3.5 weeks sertraline enough to destroy me

December 9, 2020

If you were already on the Zoloft when you had the alcohol it's easy to see the connection.

If it was before than it may have just been the lack of sleep on top of the drinks.

1 hour ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

Off the note before I started Zoloft, doctor prescribed cipralex which I took for two days , day 2 after 6-7 hrs of taking the drug completely out of my body experience for whole afternoon and night but went away next day and did not continue the drug.

So you had one adverse reaction before the Zoloft?

Again, unfortunately typical. When someone is destabilized from one drug really is the last time, IMHO, to put them on anything else.

No wonder you became worse after the Zoloft.

Please update your medication signature with the dates and the dosage of the cipralex.

That is not an insignificant matter in the overall picture.

That is TWO adverse reactions to 2 powerful medications in a short time.

Your post isnt really in chronological order enough to know what came when, but the DP could also be related to the Lexapro reaction and or alcohol.

December 9, 2020

Yes you are right I had two adverse reaction. I did not mention cipralex in my signature thinking it didn’t matter since I only took it for two days and 24 hrs after stopping it I was back to normal (except the chest tightness getting worst) till I started Zoloft.
The even with the alcohol was 2 months before developing chest tightness and trying ssris. It wasn’t DP thought , it was mild and an one minute disconnection from reality like I was about to have a panic attack but just getting some fresh air for a minute I was back to ok.
When started to suffer from extreme chest tightness I also had panic attacks thinking I cannot breath. That was also before the drugs.
all these was nothing compared to what I am going through now or during the time taking Zoloft. Surprisingly I have no chest tightness anymore but I am in pure hell due to DP. It mighty also worth noticing 1) the 3rd day on Zoloft I had a complete out of my body experience like with cipralex and I started also being in a constant state of fear and panic ( which I don’t have now). Third WEEk into Zoloft I lost my mind , completely DP for hours between 2pm to 8 pm but getting relief late nights .

2) while tapering I switched in liquid Zoloft and I think it made me feel worst.... I noticed that the liquid is diluted in 12/ alcohol and I also don’t know how stable it could be when compounded at low doses (mine was made as 1.25mg/ml while company”s instructions are 20mg/ml.). So there is a chance that liquid Zoloft at lower concentration might not be stable for many days????

December 9, 2020

25 minutes ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

while tapering I switched in liquid Zoloft and I think it made me feel worst.

This was more likely due to the drug getting into your system quicker because it was in liquid form, not tablet.

December 9, 2020

30 minutes ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

I had two adverse reaction. I did not mention cipralex in my signature thinking it didn’t matter since I only took it for two days and 24 hrs after stopping it I was back to normal (except the chest tightness getting worst) till I started Zoloft.

People suffer severe symptoms such as your having from only one short exposure to a single drug.

Since it was only 12 days in between the Cipralex and the Zoloft it hard to say how much of the 2 compounded upon the other.

Sometimes people feel better for a bit and then symptoms come back.

Meaning that even if you didn't take any Zoloft you may still have had some extended issues.

But the amount of time you did stay on the Zoloft is what I don't understand, since you stopped the Cipralex after 2 days from the reaction.

Even though you started with the :

35 minutes ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

the 3rd day on Zoloft I had a complete out of my body experience like with cipralex and I started also being in a constant state of fear and panic

For what ever reason you decided to push through with it.

If the episode with the alcohol was pre medication, it just may show how sensitive your system is to ANY mind altering substance.

I don't think the liquid version was the issue, I think it's that you continued to stay on the drug for a really long time after initial reaction.

I know you feel like it was "Only" 3 and a half weeks, but just continuing another 1 week after adverse symptoms is enough to give people extended issues.

One and half months off is good!

December 9, 2020

Yes my brain is definitely sensitive. Years ago being pregnant on my first child, I was given folic acid and vitamins complex and could not tolerate it... was getting dizzy after taking it and the doctor told me to take 1/3 and was better but still not easy to take it. I understand your surprise about staying in Zoloft after the adverse reaction but as many others I was told by my doctor to “push through” and just take Xanax and it will be fine in two weeks. I was told “ stay strong take the side effects and all will be good. You have to push through so u can get better for your kids to have their mom around happy and healthy” I was told this by 4 different doctors. So I believed them.... and three four months later I am totally disabled and in pure hell.
Now they tell me u need to try prozac. I don’t want too but being 45 days off and with no improvement (I am actually worst than while in the drug) I might go for it as I don’t want to end up killing my self. These are not feelings a human being can tolerate. Depersonalization and soul death is above and beyond. Maybe after all there is smg wrong with my brain and the MRI planned to be done soon , will show it (although I had a simple brain CT and was clear)

My doctor even claims that it is easy to come off due to its long life and that u don’t gain weight from Prozac... really?? I read 100nds of people testifying the exact opposite

December 9, 2020

With all due respect to the doctors who do mean well but only deal with "baseline normal" reactions, if you were sensitive to folic acid and the alcohol and 2 psych drugs, Prozac is only going to make you worse. I realize you feel a bit worse now than when you were on but that can very well be a bit of withdrawal from the Zoloft kicking in along with the adverse reaction. A 3rd drug is not going to fix either the adverse reaction with the possibility of a bit of WD thrown in. All it will do is change the Hell you are in and possibly make your worse and delay the healing.

This entire website is a shrine to testimonial after testimonial of people feeling so awful they were willing to try anything, and so they do, only to find out to their dismay the warnings we give them that "it can be worse" come to pass. I ask you to really think seriously if this is a good idea and thoroughly question them as to why they think a 3rd psych drug is going to "fix" the consequences of 2 other adverse reactions.

December 9, 2020

I agree with you with all my mind and soul but ..... can’t take it anymore ..... I will resist as much as I can. This is so difficult especially the possibility of having DP for ever. I just read a story of a member here who never healed following two pills of Effexor ... visual snow three years later persists .... I am afraid, in agony every single minute.

December 9, 2020

And another member 13 months off still depersonalized.... some testimonials in utube, permanently depersonalized. The only reason I am thinking a small dose of an ssri might help is because reading my suffering notebook I see I was feeling much better while tapering the week at 6.25 mg Zoloft.
also isn’t 45 days long enough for Zoloft to be out of my body? I actually had a genetics test done and the results showed that I am a super rapid metabolizer of Zoloft and cipralex which indicates that I should not have neither side effects nor therapeutic effects at low doses and suggested I need to go to 200mg in order to get into my brain!!! What the ****? I only took 25 mg and killed me

Edited December 9, 2020 by ChessieCat
changed caps to LC and changed swearing to asterisks

December 9, 2020

1 minute ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

I just read a story of a member here who never healed following two pills of Effexor ... visual snow three years later persists

Three years is not a very long time for recovery from the effect of antidepressants.

See these 2 posts about recovery:

vision-symptoms-floaters-snow-blurreddimmed-vision-twitching-dry-eyes-and-pain/page/11/#elControls_497483_menu

vision-symptoms-floaters-snow-blurreddimmed-vision-twitching-dry-eyes-and-pain/page/11/#elControls_494520_menu

It took Altostrata about 11 years to fully recover from PAWS after cold turkeying Paxil.

I suggest that you stay focused on the recovery stories instead.

Some people think that after "x" amount of time they should be recovered. Possibly they have improved in other areas but one or two particular things are still not recovered and they focus on those.

December 9, 2020

11 minutes ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

I only took 25 mg and killed me

This is an exaggeration. Whilst you continue thinking like this all you are doing is adding more stress to your body which can slow your recovery because the brain is busy dealing with the added stress and is less able to regain homeostasis.

December 10, 2020

It's called catastrophic thinking or stinking thinking and is not healthy. It is possible to learn ways to manage this negative type of thinking.

December 10, 2020

Well, if the genetic testing didn't bother to register the amount at which "adverse reaction" could occur, than it's a bit incomplete, isn't it?

And with all due respect, again, what is a "therapeutic dose", and how do you know what that would be from person to person?

I understand metabolism issues, but that does NOT extrapolate to the amount of med needed to arrive at a certain therapeutic dose, since that doesn't exist.

Now, if they want to talk in terms of how many mgs is necessary to rewire a certain percentage of the brain, thats a different story.

But that's far from being a "therapeutic guarantee".

All it is, is a "guesstimate" at how much might be needed by a certain person before certain brain remodeling takes effect.

But brain remodeling is no guarantee of positive success when so much personal testimonial negates the supposed science.

I think your best bet is to realize the best thing you can do for yourself now is give your time to heal.

It WILL happen.

But the added emotional stress of reading too many horror stories will keep your cortisol elevated which will made the DP worse.

And incredible hard thing to do, I know, but necessary, to force yourself to think of anything BUT the issue.

December 10, 2020

Thank you for your messages but the hell I am in 24/7 is not an exaggeration.... it’s reality .... I d prefer that the adverse reaction had killed me indeed instead of torturing me like this. Before this med I was the most positive person on earth even at bad times..,. I dont think I am being catastrophic ( being Greek I know very well the meaning of this word)... I am just expressing a strong possibility.... of not recovering .... but ur right I have to think positive

December 10, 2020

We aren't down playing the suffering, we aren't doctors who haven't even taken these poisons, we're people who have been where you are.

But Chessie has a point, your choice of words do tend to be on the catastrophic end. It didn't actually "kill you".

Granted, that can be a normal first reaction to major pain and trauma, but the key to healing will be to grab a hold of it.

Those links will be of more use to you than Prozac.

Remember, its one day at a time, not next week or next month.

I'd dare to say in 6 weeks you've already learned coping skills you didn't have before.

Just continue on making more positive ones that work for you.

Expressing a "strong possibility" of not recovering is not supported by the many cases of those who do.

In many cases, the difference between a success story and a horror story is nothing but the way a person "chooses" to look at the battle.

If you choose to believe you would have been better off dead, than you probably don't heal as well as you could.

As your title says: "Jesus save Me".

Nothing happens to us outside God's permissive will.

Why He permits these seemingly random but brutal turns in life can seem like a mystery but there is a reason.

If you continue to compare your present reality to what you thought you had in the past, you reject the gift of life offered to you today.

Each day is a gift.

What we choose to do with the trials each day presents is the true measure of our beliefs not only in ourselves but in our wider world view.

Edited December 10, 2020 by Colonial

December 10, 2020

acceptance

Learning to accept can be very hard. Remember to compare how you are now with how you were at your worst, not how you were at your best or how you want to be.

Also, how we get through the recovery can make a big difference.

Think of it like being stuck in traffic and/or getting stuck at traffic lights. You can't make it go any faster. You can sit there and get angry etc, but accepting the situation causes a lot less stress.

Or this one: Use the image of waiting in a queue When you are in a queue you can't make it move any quicker than it does. You have no control over it. All you can do is wait in the line. How you wait is what is going to make a difference. You can either be impatient and start getting irritable and think bad things and complain to the other people who might start agreeing with you which increases the negativity of the situation and can make you feel worse or you can try to be patient and calm and try and think of nice things and look at the things around you. It's going to take the same amount of time for you to get to the head of the queue but you can either make the experience of waiting pleasant or unpleasant.

December 10, 2020

Check out this member's topic:

noh1995-will-it-get-better

December 10, 2020

And this member, who has had some windows of improvement:

ashkaye-took-lexapro-for-a-week-for-heart-palpitations

December 10, 2020

Yes Colonial it is all nonsense . As a molecular neurobiologist I understand what the genetic test found and that is that I have two gene alleles which metabolize Zoloft fast and take it out of my body fast . Well imagine if I didn’t have them and this poison had stayed in my body longer ....

I ll try hard to take ur advice and remember that taking Prozac will only make things worst. That was my argument when the doctor suggested Zoloft following cipralex .... I said it is still an ssri why would it help? “ they work different they said ...” great thanks for ruining my life and my kids life. My husband being a physician supports the doctor prescribing the Zoloft but I can’t blame him ... he knows what he has read in his med books never took an ssri. And it is true that there are many people taking cipralex, Zoloft or Prozac and do good without side effects or WD if they decide to quit ( I personally know them) but there also others who are ruined like me.

December 10, 2020

You mentioned that you are "Greek" and I see you are residing in Canada.

Is English your native language or are you originally from Greece and is Greek your native tounge?

I would like to make sure we have an understanding of the situation before moving forward.

While normally posting in other members threads for asking questions, sharing insights and offering support is a normal part of how the website operates there is a fine line between that and accidentally "dumping" too much emotion, angst and unanswerable existential grief on other members which is not in their best interest.

After your posts in another members thread containing lines such as:

"I am afraid I ll never recover

" I am convinced I will not make it....."

" I don’t think I can take 3 or even 1 year of this. Depersonalization is living while ur dead."

After that a Administrator asked you to move your conversation here into your own thread.

Considering your own very emotive, over exaggerative and negative statements here such as:

"I only took 25 mg and killed me"

" I am just expressing a strong possibility.... of not recovering "

And most unhelpful to yourself, others reading along and staff: " I d prefer that the adverse reaction had killed me."

You then posted just posted in the last hour in the other members thread again:

"how am I supposed to make it through for month or years till recovery??? I am mostly asking God......how???"

While I understand your theological despair, continual posting of such nature in others threads is likely to be detrimental to their recovery.

Your choice of language is very emotionally aggressive and not conducive to your recovery, other members or that of the staff.

This is why I am asking if this is a question of language translation or if English is your native tounge.

While their is no ban on discussing existential philosophy or theology on this site, it is the aggressive despair attached to your questions and statements that can not be continued to be permitted. As a member, you agree to certain responsibilities, and are to be aware of site guidelines.

This is a support site. When you registered on this site, you agreed to our Rules and guidelines. These are in place to foster a safe, healthy online community.

While other forum sites may permit some aggressive behaviors, we do not. Our members are already experiencing an unfortunate amount of stress.
We understand you may be angry, anxious, and we'll give you some latitude and pointers about posts we believe to be in good faith. But if after continual warnings you cross the line 4 times, you will be banned from the site. Moderators may ask you to reword, or they may remove offending posts or topics."

The mods may or may not give you a verbal warning first without a warning point. If you go ahead and do the thing you've been warned about, you'll get a warning point, up to 4 warning points.

If you get 4 warning points, you will be banned automatically.

What will get you warned
Here are a few things that may get you warnings:

Example: Taking over someone's Introductions topic to make it about your concerns

To get support from staff here, we ask each member to open an Introductions topic to discuss their specific situation. They owner of the Introductions topic is encouraged to post questions there, get answers and support from staff and other members, and look back on the Intro topic as a record of their progress. It is like an ongoing, first-person case history.

It's one thing to empathize with any member here and share your experiences and opinions, but it's another thing to take over someone's Intro topic and make it All About You. This is selfish and disrespectful to the owner of the topic. It also can obscure the owner's need for information and support.

If you do this persistently, you may earn a warning point. Post about your concerns in your own Introductions topic."

Please understand that while we are sympathetic to the amount of suffering you are in, we cannot allow that to run roughshod over other members threads or the other forums. Please think carefully about what you post in other threads, or that privilege will be rescinded.

Again, while normal sharing of symptoms and questions are normal to some extent, you need to tone down the emotional aggression level and the negativity.

When posting in another's personal thread, whether a question or a statement, it's helpful to think of their thread as their "personal house". While members generally do not need an invitation to post in others threads, please just remember to act as if you were a guest in their private home. Just showing up in a person's thread and expecting answers to questions about God's will can put puts people in an uncomfortable spot as no one is required or expected to give a defense for their personal religious beliefs. Asking questions in such a way is the emotional equivalent to busting down someone's front door and demanding answers to personal questions. Please do not continue to badger other members in their threads about answers to religious beliefs. You may find others willing to discuss theology here with you if they wish but that should be a personal decision.

Thank you

Edited December 10, 2020 by Colonial

December 10, 2020

I already apologized, I was not aware how things work. I didn’t even realize I have to tag someone to make a comment and don’t understand how to move smg I already posted. Yes Greek is my native language.

December 10, 2020

Thank you for letting us know Greek is your native language, that will be a great help in helping understand each other going forward!

We understand some words translate differently into other languages, or in other cultures words can have a different sociological meaning or import.

Sometimes problems of language are really just problems of how different cultures go about expressing themselves.

You do not have to tag someone to make a comment here if youare just talking about your issue in general, but if you wish for a particular member to see your post here than the best way to make sure that happens is to do the @tag. No need to worry about moving old posts, staff can do that, but you are able to "edit" a post within the first hour, so you could go in and remove it that way if you ever felt the need to do so. The edit is at the top right of the posts. Where you see the word "Author" there are 3 dots to the right. click on those and the edit option drops down.

We do have specific threads that are for just certain topics, those may be good for you to ask open questions to others in general without accidentally putting any one member on the spot to answer in their personal thread "house".

You may like this link!

Finding meaning Explorations of healing philosophies and faith

That opens to an entire list of topics, a couple of which would be a great place, other than here in your own thread, to open up a good discussion with any one who is willing to discuss your concerns and questions on a more existential matter. That is one of our "neutral forums" where members are free to come and go. Please just remember to be respectful that too much negativity will eventually cause a problem wherever you post.

Have a good day!

December 12, 2020

47 days off Zoloft.

Depersonalization 24/7 , no windows but intensity fluctuate s during the day. Like 4 (out of 10 being the worst) early morning, picks at 9 level around noon and then drops at 6 level around 9/10pm

Sleep : I think it is improving

eye floaters: I am pretty sure they are improving

soul pain/desperation : ups and downs but overall feels a bit less.

Had diarrhea as well this week and was thinking maybe my body is now clearing this Zoloft poison.

trying to stay strong and not give in into doctors directions about starting Prozac. I know it is a bad idea but when DP gets bad I am tempted to try Prozac.
I don’t remember which site I read this but it was mentioned “ if your DP is a result of a drug WD good news, you don’t need to worry about it.... it will slowly dissipate.....

praying for all DP/DR sufferers for full recovery

December 13, 2020

@JesusSavemefromWD how are you today ?

December 13, 2020

Hi RickyIsHealing,

Yesterday late afternoon I felt a bit better. Even though completely in Depersonalization, I had this calm feeling in my soul instead of the usual soul dreadful feelings I have and for some reason I felt I was gonna get over this. I slept good. Today i don’t feel as good as yesterday but what is clear to me is if my brain could get over the depersonalization I would be almost cured, but no signs of that at the moment. I found on line free meditation videos from a therapist who actually experienced DP himself and got over it, so I ll try that for a while
how about you? Hang in there please without meds

Edited December 13, 2020 by JesusSavemefromWD
Used word medicine instead of medication

December 13, 2020

That's good to hear and yeah we have to try everything we can ! natural wise anyway !

yeah i also feel like if my brain can heal all this anxiety and tripping out feeling i have , i would also be close to recoverin.

i slept good last night but obviously woke up to a new day of dealing with this bullsh*t

can help but feel like this is never going to end if im honest !

December 13, 2020

It will end ... we are healthy and still young, our brains still have plasticity . The way I see it now is like a had a stroke that affected my whole brain. The stroke took place within minutes but the recovery will take weeks or months and will be slow. I tell myself it’s ok you are recovering from a whole brain stroke, you cannot expect fast recovery

December 13, 2020

well I'm 28 , so i guess i am kind of still young , its so scary because everyone tells me ill heal and deep down inside i like to think i will heal but right now it seems like something that will never happen if you get me ?

i feel like "yeah everyone else will heal and has healed but i wont" ?

my brain hates me currently lol

I'm doing every think i can either way so have to wait and see , hope it isn't years for me (us )

x

December 13, 2020

Here you go.

@JesusSavemefromWD, I moved the the rest of the conversation, with @RickyIsHealinghere to your thread.

Happy Holidays guys! 🤐

December 14, 2020

7 full weeks completely OFF , no improvement in DP but last three days after 9 pm there are moments of soul relief even if in DP state.
please tell me again I am doing the right thing taking this suffering and not trying another drug to fix what Zoloft did? My husband is upset with me, he doesn’t understand how sick I am cause he sees no physical symptoms and he thinks it’s all in my head and gets frustrated for not taking care of the house and kids as I used to do. Well what my parents taught me is that when one is sick the other stands by and supports ....

December 14, 2020

46 minutes ago, JesusSavemefromWD said:

My husband is upset with me, he doesn’t understand how sick I am cause he sees no physical symptoms and he thinks it’s all in my head and gets frustrated for not taking care of the house and kids as I used to do. Well what my parents taught me is that when one is sick the other stands by and supports ....

I'm sorry about that.

The fact is until you have lived this others can't truly understand the gravity of the suffering or how much it can disable you.

I often wonder considering the enormity of the number of people disabled by them why they are still on the market.

And then I realize their is no way for a review board to truly comprehend the enormity of the personal suffering they cause.

Glad your starting to get a few hours relief at night.

That's exactly how it went for me, horrible all day and then 2-3 hours a night of relief before sleep and then only sleep 2 hours a night and start all over.

Then I would start to sleep 4 hours, and have bigger breaks of relief on and off in the day over the next month, etc.,

Edited December 14, 2020 by Colonial

December 14, 2020

My panic attacks are also gone for good. I started having them during on Zoloft and tapering. Now I am “normally scared” in the possibility of not getting over with DP. My appetite is also getting better these last three days especially as the day progresses. I know these are good signs so I am trying to hold on... but this disconnection from my brain due to DP it feels like a horror movie scenario . Thank you for replying

December 14, 2020

Those are all excellent signs!

The problem that occurs is that because our system is in constant red alert, it tries to "force" us to think about the issue for a solution.

Even though we know only time will do that, the subconscious part of the brain continues to fight to try to "make" us look for a quicker solution.

That also leads to the thoughts of never getting better which is part of the fear based reaction our entire system is having.

Forcing ourselves to think about anything else is terribly difficult and takes training and paying attention to our thought process.

It is a learned skill for most of us but does eventually help us all live in the present moment and not the past or future, where most of our fears reside.

December 14, 2020

It’s been three days in a row... as day progress not only I am hungry but I am starving eve though I had a good lunch and dinner, around 10 pm I feel I am starving and craving sweet things... I feel it in my guts that’s a good sign .... if I tell my doctor she ll probably tell me “ hmm you are probably developing an eating disorder as well let’s get u on Prozac right now!” Lol ... I can’t believe I am making a joke even though depersonalized.... that’s another good sign. I was on this med for so little ... my recovery can’t be too far away

December 14, 2020

Many members report changes in their hunger/lack of hunger.

The main thing is to try to maintain a steady blood sugar level because large fluctuations can cause anxiety or other symptoms to worsen.

December 14, 2020

6 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

maintain a steady blood sugar level because large fluctuations can cause anxiety or other symptoms to worsen.

Yes, this is excellent advice from Chessie, please do try to remember that!

Large amounts of carbs for me in the afternoon from 3pm to 8pm was what caused my sleep paralysis in the afternoons 5 years ago.

And now I just deduced it to be the reason for hours of heart palpitations in the late afternoon-evening the past 3 months.

It is amazing how something so seemingly simple had have such a good or negative impact.

December 14, 2020

Looks like you have never been given this link:

Video: Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

JesusSavemefromWD: only 3.5 weeks sertraline enough to destroy me

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