Terry4949: withdrawal help

[Terry4949]

On 12/16/2023 at 7:07 AM, Onmyway said:

@Terry4949,

Are you taking magnesium? It's also supposed to help with muscles spams and most people are deficient. 

 

Try magnesium citrate or magnesium glycinate. Avoid magnesium oxide (can cause loose stools).

Thank you for your reply unfortunately I cannot tolerate any magnesium even in small doses even if sipped through water just can’t tolerate it other wise I would try it 

[Rosetta]

Terry, 

Please try using heat for the spasms.  If I were you I would not touch those drugs they are prescribing to you.  There are some heat patches I buy in the US.  They stick on the skin and last for about 6 hours.  I bought them at the store with a pharmacy inside called CVS.

[Terry4949]

I’m nearly at the 7 year mark now from quitting all meds it seems such a long hard journey while some of my symptoms have eased some have not and one particular symptom seems to be getting worse and that’s the depression 

I have spoke about this many times over the years on my posts and I have received so much help and words of encouragement for which I am eternally grateful 

I have tried so many things and read so much on depression over the period of 7 years my diet is very good no smoking or drinking I do things even though I feel like giving up I walk every day I got a new dog 9 months ago to be honest my life is very good a family etc yet the one symptom that is really destroying me is the depression and it’s the soul crushing type not just the feeling of sadness

i have had some counselling but apart from withdrawal there are no traumas in my life 

I was medicated for 30 years and I now have started to think that maybe even though my brain has made new connections that somehow the depression is permanent I truly wish this is not the case but the longer out I seem to go the deeper it’s seems to be in me 

certain things have eased over the years more physical than mental I am now able to fall a sleep at 9 pm and sleep until 3 am so that’s a full 6 hours sleep this has been for the last 6 months as most of the last 7 years I have had only had about 3 hours I was hoping that when my sleep increased that my depression would but unfortunately that hasn’t happened 

Over the years I have seen many people recover within this group but I’m not seeing many long term people like myself I have read the success stories so many times to give me hope and to be honest some days it’s basically kept me alive but there are not many success stories from people 7 years out and I know there are some horrific stories on there but most have recovered in around the 3 year mark so I do know that healing does happen and I’m so pleased for those that have found it truly I am 

I know I have covered my depression on so many of my previous posts and I have been giving some wonderful advice and thank you all for that 

I just feel so alone with it all if I contact any doctor or mental health practitioner they all just say that I need meds but at 7 years of I don’t want to throw all that time away 

just looking for some hope in this bad time 

thank you for listening 

 

 

[getofflex]

Terry I understand about depression.  I have had it probably most, if not all of my life.  

 

I truly believe not all depression is based on the physical or on withdrawal.  I personally believe that a lot of depression is based on many of us not having a sense of purpose in something bigger than ourselves.  I also believe a lot of depression is just a normal part of life.  

 

Personally, for me, I have to have a strong faith life and spiritual life, and be involved in helping other people.  If I don't, I get very depressed.  It doesn't completely take away the depression, but it sure helps to make it a lot better.  I'm not depressed every day, but there are some days I do feel depressed.  Wintertime is an especially tough season for depression, with low light levels and the cold days.  

[laura77]

I have been reading most of this thread, what a terrible experience, my heart goes out to you, but I'm happy you are off everything and the worst has passed.  Can I ask when the anxiety/cortisol spikes stopped?

[Terry4949]

5 hours ago, laura77 said:

I have been reading most of this thread, what a terrible experience, my heart goes out to you, but I'm happy you are off everything and the worst has passed.  Can I ask when the anxiety/cortisol spikes stopped?

Thank you for your reply I never really suffered from anxiety only bad withdrawal anxiety in the first couple of years but that has gone but I still suffer the morning cortisol and adrenaline spikes at 3am every morning for me these have never gone away I believe this is why I still struggle to heal as everyday my body starts on a bad note to speak 

I seem to have tried to do everything in my power to help hoping that in time it would heal but it’s been a long a very slow road 

[Terry4949]

10 hours ago, getofflex said:

Terry I understand about depression.  I have had it probably most, if not all of my life.  

 

I truly believe not all depression is based on the physical or on withdrawal.  I personally believe that a lot of depression is based on many of us not having a sense of purpose in something bigger than ourselves.  I also believe a lot of depression is just a normal part of life.  

 

Personally, for me, I have to have a strong faith life and spiritual life, and be involved in helping other people.  If I don't, I get very depressed.  It doesn't completely take away the depression, but it sure helps to make it a lot better.  I'm not depressed every day, but there are some days I do feel depressed.  Wintertime is an especially tough season for depression, with low light levels and the cold days.  

Thank you for reply

i try everything I can to make myself not like depressed I socialise go out for long walks I help others 

I do feel I have a sense of purpose there are so many things I won’t to do in life and things that I enjoy that I want to take part in yet the depression stays with me inside I want to cry even while performing these tasks yet I put on a brave face on the outside 

I can’t remember the last time I ever had a day when I didn’t feel depressed I must admit I do hate the winters the dark mornings and evenings are hard on me as I know on others 

I just wish I could just get a little relief from it all so that I could feel some sort of hope 

I’m sorry that you have struggled with depression and I’m glad you have found ways to ease your suffering and it’s nice to hear that you have depression free days 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Terry4949

Why do you not cry when you feel the need to? Why put a brave face and deny these feelings? Crying can release a lot of pent up emotions. It's our safety valve.

 

Omw

[getofflex]

12 hours ago, Terry4949 said:

yet the depression stays with me inside I want to cry even while performing these tasks yet I put on a brave face on the outside 

Terry my heart goes out to you.  I'm wondering if you could have unprocessed grief inside of you?  I know that I had unprocessed grief inside of me, and as I got off the drugs, I needed to process the grief.  That means allowing yourself to feel it and express it. There is a very good book that helped me with this called "The Tao of Fully Feeling" by Pete Walker. You can get it on amazon.   You could also go talk to a therapist/counselor/pastor.  I would find one who understands depression and grief.  As I have processed my grief, I have less of that sad, depressed feeling inside of me.  It's wonderful that you are doing a lot of good activities.  

 

5 hours ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949

Why do you not cry when you feel the need to? Why put a brave face and deny these feelings? Crying can release a lot of pent up emotions. It's our safety valve.

 

Omw

Hear hear!  I full heartedly agree with what onmyway says above.  Allow yourself to cry, and release these pent up emotions.  Don't be ashamed of tears.  We are all human, and we all get sad and need to let it out.  

Edited January 19 by getofflex

[Terry4949]

5 hours ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949

Why do you not cry when you feel the need to? Why put a brave face and deny these feelings? Crying can release a lot of pent up emotions. It's our safety valve.

5 hours ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949

Why do you not cry when you feel the need to? Why put a brave face and deny these feelings? Crying can release a lot of pent up emotions. It's our safety valve.

 

Omw

The reason I don’t cry is because I just can’t I so wish I could truly I do I can feel the feeling all day long it’s awful but the tears won’t flow it’s not that I put on a brave face I actually tell my loved ones how I feel so tearful yet I can’t cry it’s a awful feeling to be stuck in 

I so wish I could cry like you say I’m sure I would feel so much relief releasing the safety valve 

I have read from other members who have said the same that they feel so emotional that they just want to cry all day but just can’t for some unknown reasons 

I can feel the tears in my eyes but they just don’t flow 

 

[Terry4949]

18 minutes ago, getofflex said:

Terry my heart goes out to you.  I'm wondering if you could have unprocessed grief inside of you?  I know that I had unprocessed grief inside of me, and as I got off the drugs, I needed to process the grief.  That means allowing yourself to feel it and express it. There is a very good book that helped me with this called "The Tao of Fully Feeling" by Pete Walker. You can get it on amazon.   You could also go talk to a therapist/counselor/pastor.  I would find one who understands depression and grief.  As I have processed my grief, I have less of that sad, depressed feeling inside of me.  It's wonderful that you are doing a lot of good activities.  

 

Hear hear!  I full heartedly agree with what onmyway says above.  Allow yourself to cry, and release these pent up emotions.  Don't be ashamed of tears.  We are all human, and we all get sad and need to let it out.  

I’m not sure if i have unprocessed grief inside me or not to be honest I know I hate what these meds have done to my life I hate the fact the medical profession that I deal with still don’t believe that I have been harmed by the meds 

I have had counselling and talk therapy a few times over the years and to be honest I didn’t get much joy 

i truly have a good life a loving family no debt I don’t drink or smoke I live in a lovely village with lots of open spaces and walks 

I motivate myself every day I shower take care of my personal appearance I have a good family i socialise I try to live a life as best as possible 

but the only thing that stops me from enjoying anything is the soul crushing depression I feel dead empty inside I find concentration very hard I find no joy in tv films ect I do read a lot but have difficulty holding on to what I have read I participate in life with my family yet every day I struggle with a crushing sadness I feel no joy or excitement and I think this is what hurts me the most for the last 7 years I have tried so much  yet have found no reward it’s like I’m being punished maybe this is the grief that is unprocessed I truly don’t know what to do anymore 7 years has been so long 

I have tried so many therapies acupuncture mindfulness etc but never found any relief I still can’t tolerate any supplements as I’m so sensitive even after 7 years 

im sorry if this post sounds depressing in it’s self I truly don’t want you to think that I’m not trying and I’m making excuses not to try and change things as I couldn’t want anything more than for this to lift 

I just feel I’m running out of option and time

Anhendonia truly sucks as well 

Thank you for listening 

 

 

 

[Terry4949]

I seemed to have hit a new low struggling so bad ever since the cortisol mornings started again now it has seemed to have triggered a lot of old symptoms I have all the symptoms of dystaunomia again the feeling of faintness like I’m going to pass out then I over heat my vision is so blurred and I feel dreadful like I am about to die

my depression has sunk to a new low and I have that inner akathisia feeling again my legs hurt so bad but I feel the need to move them I had forgot how bad these symptoms were my sleep is only 3 hours now again broken with a lot of unsettling dreams 

I have done nothing or taken any medication to trigger this it has just come so severe out of the blue I’m feeling so disheartened at 7 years of all meds I feel like I’m doing something wrong 

I did manage to get to doing some work but now I’m off as I am so sick again which is very worrying as I don’t get paid 

If I go to the doctor to get signed off they don’t believe that you are in withdrawal or have been damaged by medication they say it’s the reason you need to be on them my doctor won’t give me a sick note when I asked last time he laughed at me and thought I was just trying to bunk of work for a couple of weeks he said that going to work would occupy my mind I can’t even watch tv or read a book because I’m so sick at the moment even cooking is hard work even though I have zero appetite 

sorry for ranting again just feel so helpless this is so hard 

 

 

[Onmyway]

17 hours ago, Terry4949 said:

I seemed to have hit a new low struggling so bad ever since the cortisol mornings started again now it has seemed to have triggered a lot of old symptoms I have all the symptoms of dystaunomia again the feeling of faintness like I’m going to pass out then I over heat my vision is so blurred and I feel dreadful like I am about to die

my depression has sunk to a new low and I have that inner akathisia feeling again my legs hurt so bad but I feel the need to move them I had forgot how bad these symptoms were my sleep is only 3 hours now again broken with a lot of unsettling dreams 

I have done nothing or taken any medication to trigger this it has just come so severe out of the blue I’m feeling so disheartened at 7 years of all meds I feel like I’m doing something wrong 

I did manage to get to doing some work but now I’m off as I am so sick again which is very worrying as I don’t get paid 

If I go to the doctor to get signed off they don’t believe that you are in withdrawal or have been damaged by medication they say it’s the reason you need to be on them my doctor won’t give me a sick note when I asked last time he laughed at me and thought I was just trying to bunk of work for a couple of weeks he said that going to work would occupy my mind I can’t even watch tv or read a book because I’m so sick at the moment even cooking is hard work even though I have zero appetite 

sorry for ranting again just feel so helpless this is so hard 

 

 

@Terry4949

Two tips

1) drink extra water - 3 lt a day minimum if you think you have POTS like symptoms. You'll also need to eat more salty things. What is your diet like? Are your vitamin levels good - vitamin Bs and D especially can get pretty low in the winter in the UK. 

 

2) next time you go to the doctor,  tell him about your physical symptoms but don't say you think they're withdrawal related. Let him offer a diagnosis. Let him investigate for POTS etc. 

 

For the cortisol mornings take 300mg aspirin before going to bed if you don't have bleeding risks. It's shown to reduce cortisol.

 

Omw

[Terry4949]

1 minute ago, Onmyway said:

@Terry4949

Two tips

1) drink extra water - 3 lt a day minimum if you think you have POTS like symptoms. You'll also need to eat more salty things. What is your diet like? Are your vitamin levels good - vitamin Bs and D especially can get pretty low in the winter in the UK. 

 

2) next time you go to the doctor,  tell him about your physical symptoms but don't say you think they're withdrawal related. Let him offer a diagnosis. Let him investigate for POTS etc. 

 

For the cortisol mornings take 300mg aspirin before going to bed if you don't have bleeding risks. It's shown to reduce cortisol.

 

Omw

Thank you for your reply I do drink a lot of water daily as I am constantly thirsty as for salt I only get it from what I eat I’m not particularly a salt lover like spreading on my food 

I’m not sure what my vitamin levels are like I have arranged a blood test for this week and I went to see my gp yesterday and told them about all my physical symptoms the worst being the early morning cortisol and adrenaline plus the all over burning and tingling of the body I told them it was unbearable I actually got rather emotional but she said she just thinks it’s my depression even though I didn’t tell her I was depressed

as for the aspirin I did try for a while a baby aspirin but it didn’t make any difference also I react to histamine and aspirin can raise histamine 

I again tried to take magnesium glycinate to see if that would help but that makes me feel more depressed 

supplements are not great for me to be honest I just find it so hard to understand why the cortisol adrenaline have come back so severe after so long off these are far worse than in the early years and so intense it feels like I’m am being injected with a poison and I’m certain it’s feuling the chronic depression 

 

 

[Onmyway]

On 1/27/2024 at 6:01 AM, Terry4949 said:

Thank you for your reply I do drink a lot of water daily as I am constantly thirsty as for salt I only get it from what I eat I’m not particularly a salt lover like spreading on my food 

I’m not sure what my vitamin levels are like I have arranged a blood test for this week and I went to see my gp yesterday and told them about all my physical symptoms the worst being the early morning cortisol and adrenaline plus the all over burning and tingling of the body I told them it was unbearable I actually got rather emotional but she said she just thinks it’s my depression even though I didn’t tell her I was depressed

as for the aspirin I did try for a while a baby aspirin but it didn’t make any difference also I react to histamine and aspirin can raise histamine 

I again tried to take magnesium glycinate to see if that would help but that makes me feel more depressed 

supplements are not great for me to be honest I just find it so hard to understand why the cortisol adrenaline have come back so severe after so long off these are far worse than in the early years and so intense it feels like I’m am being injected with a poison and I’m certain it’s feuling the chronic depression 

 

 

Hi @Terry4949

to be clear SA's 'morning cortisol' idea is not proven - it is a conjecture that the reason why we have this extreme agitation in the morning could be from the cortisol variation in our body throughout the day. We haven't tested it and it may not even be possible to test. Some people get the same agitation from waking up no matter what time of the day (i.e. from a nap - it could be related to sleep itself). Even if it is indeed cortisol we don't know if we  1) release more cortisol than others at that time or 2) are more sensitive to the cortisol that we normally release during withdrawal. Or it could be something entirely different.  I use the cortisol idea myself - it is a good shorthand but if I told that to the GP I would say something like - I have these symptoms. Other people in WD get these symptoms as well and they think it may be related to cortisol. The GP can't really do anything about this though. 

 

You can try 300mg of aspirin before bedtime for a few nights and see if it does anything but given your histamine issues that may not be a good idea.  

 

You can remind your doctor that you were never depressed prior to stopping the drugs and that the original reason you went on them was anxiety, not depression. 

 

You can tell her that you are not aware of any cases where neuropathic issues (burning, tingling etc.) are part of a depression diagnosis so you'd like those investigated. Lots of vitamin deficiencies can cause peripheral neuropathy

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/mus.26783

 

I suspect that your depression and your neuropathies are due to some lack of nutrients - either from not getting them from the diet or not absorbing them or some other issue. I strongly advise you to push for them. You can do some research and see what deficiencies can cause neuropathic pain (e.g. B12, B6, D, Mg, E etc.) and see if you might have them based on your diet.  

 

But GPs are the least curious people among doctors, esp in the UK and so if they don't know where something fits they will fit it with something else where it doesn't fit rather than explore and learn something new. I was told  by a UK friend that anything in the NHS can be achieved faster with a complaint. You may wish to file a complaint with the GP if she ignores your neurological issues again. 

 

If that is not true and it is indeed withdrawal, then there isn't really anything we can do. Just have to wait it out. Then we would move to acceptance, therapy and coping skills. I know you didn't find one bout of therapy helpful but it may be time to try a different one type - acceptance and commitment therapy can be useful, for example. There is CBT, IFS, psychodynamic etc etc. 

 

This sucks and I am so sorry you have been going through this for so long. It sounds exhausting! Nobody deserves this. 
 

Hope you start feeling better again soon @Terry4949

Hugs, 

OMW 

 

 

 

 

 

[Terry4949]

6 hours ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949

to be clear SA's 'morning cortisol' idea is not proven - it is a conjecture that the reason why we have this extreme agitation in the morning could be from the cortisol variation in our body throughout the day. We haven't tested it and it may not even be possible to test. Some people get the same agitation from waking up no matter what time of the day (i.e. from a nap - it could be related to sleep itself). Even if it is indeed cortisol we don't know if we  1) release more cortisol than others at that time or 2) are more sensitive to the cortisol that we normally release during withdrawal. Or it could be something entirely different.  I use the cortisol idea myself - it is a good shorthand but if I told that to the GP I would say something like - I have these symptoms. Other people in WD get these symptoms as well and they think it may be related to cortisol. The GP can't really do anything about this though. 

 

You can try 300mg of aspirin before bedtime for a few nights and see if it does anything but given your histamine issues that may not be a good idea.  

 

You can remind your doctor that you were never depressed prior to stopping the drugs and that the original reason you went on them was anxiety, not depression. 

 

You can tell her that you are not aware of any cases where neuropathic issues (burning, tingling etc.) are part of a depression diagnosis so you'd like those investigated. Lots of vitamin deficiencies can cause peripheral neuropathy

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/mus.26783

 

I suspect that your depression and your neuropathies are due to some lack of nutrients - either from not getting them from the diet or not absorbing them or some other issue. I strongly advise you to push for them. You can do some research and see what deficiencies can cause neuropathic pain (e.g. B12, B6, D, Mg, E etc.) and see if you might have them based on your diet.  

 

But GPs are the least curious people among doctors, esp in the UK and so if they don't know where something fits they will fit it with something else where it doesn't fit rather than explore and learn something new. I was told  by a UK friend that anything in the NHS can be achieved faster with a complaint. You may wish to file a complaint with the GP if she ignores your neurological issues again. 

 

If that is not true and it is indeed withdrawal, then there isn't really anything we can do. Just have to wait it out. Then we would move to acceptance, therapy and coping skills. I know you didn't find one bout of therapy helpful but it may be time to try a different one type - acceptance and commitment therapy can be useful, for example. There is CBT, IFS, psychodynamic etc etc. 

 

This sucks and I am so sorry you have been going through this for so long. It sounds exhausting! Nobody deserves this. 
 

Hope you start feeling better again soon @Terry4949

Hugs, 

OMW 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you for you wonderful reply it brought tears to my eyes it’s so nice when you know that someone understands as family and friends just want me to take a drug especially my sister who believes they make people better overnight 

 

I get the point about the cortisol all I know is since the 3 am wakings have started the depression has become soul destroying just a emptiness from the pit of my stomach even though I do everything I can to try and ease the suffering everything feels hopeless and absolutely no joy I have exhausted nearly all avenues trying to rid this for so long I think I have now become so worried that my brain is damaged beyond repair that this isn’t helping 

 

tomorrow I have blood tests so I will wait for the results to see if anything shows up I eat a very well balance diet don’t drink or smoke and walk 1-2 hours daily so maybe my nutrition maybe a part of the problem maybe I’m not absorbing them I don’t eat anything with sugar in it 

 

I have very high ferritin way above high limits which means I have to much iron in my blood cells but the hospital are still on going with that been over 2 years now waiting for treatment good old NHS in the uk plus they tell me my folate is very low even though I eat plenty of foods containing folate so maybe this is not helping 

 

If nothing shows up on the blood test I will take up your advice and go to see my doctor and say that as far as I am aware that neuropathic burning a part of a depression diagnosis maybe a complaint is in order 

 

Then if all else fails I could get some private tests done to put my mind at rest from maybe a functional doctor or someone that looks at the body for other things  but I have to be careful with supplements as I’m still very sensitive 

 

if this is truly all just withdrawal then I will have to find some way to find acceptance which I know for me is very hard like everyone else on here I suppose I wish I could just heal us all 

After 7 years and being of all meds to keep waiting for improvements have been very tiring at 4 years I said hopefully another year and I will see some improvements then at year 5 and 6 now it’s 7 I read the success stories all the time just to give me a glimmer of hope I think that’s just about stops me from totally giving up 

 

I again thank you so much for your reply it truly is appreciated as family and friends now either have given up on me or just don’t want to no anymore like for many others withdrawal can be brutal and lonely especially when those you love keep telling you that your not trying and it’s all in your head and the worst is withdrawal doesn’t last 7 years they don’t understand it at all 

 

OMY i thank you from the bottom of my heart 

Terry4949

 

 

[BigCat]

I get terrible anxiety on wakening, at any time of the day.  Not at all convinced by the cortisol explanation. 

It's easy to get sucked into catastrophising, keep things simple, look for facts/evidence not conjecture. 

Our rational brain can get overwhelmed by the fear.  We get scared, because it is uncomfortable.  You will get through this.  Emotional reasoning is anything but reasonable.  We need a hug, sometimes from ourselves... our rational selves. Big hug from me! 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Terry4949, it's hard for people to see others suffer and they often respond with frustration. I'm sorry you have to deal with that as well. 

 

I had forgotten about the elevated ferritin. I knew someone with that (genetic in that case) and she'd do through regular bleeds to control it - every few months. They'd basically take her blood as if for donation and then discard it. Before, people used leeches. I'm not advising you to do it on your own of course (also because you lack some other vitamins) but if it is genetic I think that's just what they do. 

 

Otherwise it causes issues in the internal organs.  Depression and fatigue are SYMPTOMS, as well as neuropathies (one study estimated about 1/4 of sufferers had neuropathies in the genetic cases). I remember Invitae (if it still exists) is a company that does various genetic tests fairly cheaply so you can see if you can do it on your own. 

 

Please do write complaints to your GP and the trust if needed. Two years of waiting for something like this is not acceptable. This is real. It's not in your head. It's likely physical and if she doesn't know what it is she needs to investigate it as far as she can instead of sitting on her hands. 

 

Please take good care of yourself and try to show yourself compassion even when those around you aren't able to do it. 

 

Big hugs

OMW

 

Edited January 29 by Onmyway

[Terry4949]

14 hours ago, BigCat said:

I get terrible anxiety on wakening, at any time of the day.  Not at all convinced by the cortisol explanation. 

It's easy to get sucked into catastrophising, keep things simple, look for facts/evidence not conjecture. 

Our rational brain can get overwhelmed by the fear.  We get scared, because it is uncomfortable.  You will get through this.  Emotional reasoning is anything but reasonable.  We need a hug, sometimes from ourselves... our rational selves. Big hug from me! 

Thank you for your reply 

I don’t suffer from anxiety fortunately it’s just more a physical and mentally depressive state but the nights are truly awful the burning tinging and I feel so hot the Adrenalin dumps are pure torture living of the back of 3 hours toxic sleep

i have always tried to look for facts and evidence but with this being such a complex thing withdrawal and not much information apart from this site it is hard to know what is right and wrong 

I do get over come by fear I know that as after 7 long years I’m afraid to try anything as I have tried things in the past and they have made things so much worse so I try to now just to ride it out but I’m not having much success which then feuls the fear that I will never get better 

I hope that your recovery and withdrawal goes smoothly so sending you a big hug 

I see you are in the uk as well 

 

[Terry4949]

5 hours ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949, it's hard for people to see others suffer and they often respond with frustration. I'm sorry you have to deal with that as well. 

 

I had forgotten about the elevated ferritin. I knew someone with that (genetic in that case) and she'd do through regular bleeds to control it - every few months. They'd basically take her blood as if for donation and then discard it. Before, people used leeches. I'm not advising you to do it on your own of course (also because you lack some other vitamins) but if it is genetic I think that's just what they do. 

 

Otherwise it causes issues in the internal organs.  Depression and fatigue are SYMPTOMS, as well as neuropathies (one study estimated about 1/4 of sufferers had neuropathies in the genetic cases). I remember Invitae (if it still exists) is a company that does various genetic tests fairly cheaply so you can see if you can do it on your own. 

 

Please do write complaints to your GP and the trust if needed. Two years of waiting for something like this is not acceptable. This is real. It's not in your head. It's likely physical and if she doesn't know what it is she needs to investigate it as far as she can instead of sitting on her hands. 

 

Please take good care of yourself and try to show yourself compassion even when those around you aren't able to do it. 

 

Big hugs

OMW

 

Hi OMY I believe my high ferritin is genetic every single blood test I have had in the last 4 years has shown high ferritin at the doctors so I was referred to the hospital over 2 years ago they do my bloods every 3 months then I get a call saying that the doctor wants to wait until the next one then he will decide if he is going to do blood transfusions it’s just a merry go round

 

i didn’t realise Depression and fatigue and neuropathies could be a part of this maybe it’s possible that it is contributing to my healing and is causing some of my symptoms my next scheduled appointment is in March for another blood test so I just have to wait it out I suppose as the NHS in the uk is over run now and it’s hard enough just getting a doctors appointment 

 

again thank you for your support it means a lot to me especially at this time when things for me are so bad hopefully it will lift a little soon to give me a break 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Terry4949

I guess it may be OK to wait for March but you should inform the doctor that reviews your blood tests to decide on further treatment that you have all these symptoms - depression/fatigue/neuropathies and think that may be related to the high ferritin.

 

If you're left with high ferritin levels for 4 years that will impact things for sure. They may not know that you have new symptoms and only go by blood tests and if those are not alarmingly high they may keep waiting. But the issue is that some people can have severe symptoms with less elevated markers.

 

Here are the symptoms from the NHS https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/haemochromatosis/symptoms/

 

Brain fog, depression/anxiety, stomach issues, frequent urination and thirst. I think you have quite a few of these. 

 

Here's the article that shows that 1/4 have neuropathies. You may want to share with GP - on econsult. 

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20358215/#:~:text=Involvement of peripheral nerves and,a possible polyneuropathy or myopathy.

 

This may not be withdrawal at all and can be something (easily) treatable. 

 

In the UK, GPs have options of getting urgent consults with consultants from their trust - they relay the patient problem and get a response within a day or two even if the patient can't see the consultant for years. Urge your GP to ask for a neurology GP consultation if she doesn't have an answer other than depression. They may suggest tests that you can get. 

 

If you go to them equipped with sources they take you more seriously. I would also list all your symptoms.

 

DO NOT posit conjectures or explanations. I.e.dont call it an adrenaline dump - we have no idea what is happening at the physiological level. Do not call this withdrawal - we don't know what it is. Tell them your symptoms and remind them of the Haemochromatosis and let them treat you. 

 

Rooting for you, 

Omw 

 

PS one more article showing that MH problems result from high ferritin

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8194001/

Edited January 29 by Onmyway

[Terry4949]

5 hours ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949

I guess it may be OK to wait for March but you should inform the doctor that reviews your blood tests to decide on further treatment that you have all these symptoms - depression/fatigue/neuropathies and think that may be related to the high ferritin.

 

If you're left with high ferritin levels for 4 years that will impact things for sure. They may not know that you have new symptoms and only go by blood tests and if those are not alarmingly high they may keep waiting. But the issue is that some people can have severe symptoms with less elevated markers.

 

Here are the symptoms from the NHS https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/haemochromatosis/symptoms/

 

Brain fog, depression/anxiety, stomach issues, frequent urination and thirst. I think you have quite a few of these. 

 

Here's the article that shows that 1/4 have neuropathies. You may want to share with GP - on econsult. 

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20358215/#:~:text=Involvement of peripheral nerves and,a possible polyneuropathy or myopathy.

 

This may not be withdrawal at all and can be something (easily) treatable. 

 

In the UK, GPs have options of getting urgent consults with consultants from their trust - they relay the patient problem and get a response within a day or two even if the patient can't see the consultant for years. Urge your GP to ask for a neurology GP consultation if she doesn't have an answer other than depression. They may suggest tests that you can get. 

 

If you go to them equipped with sources they take you more seriously. I would also list all your symptoms.

 

DO NOT posit conjectures or explanations. I.e.dont call it an adrenaline dump - we have no idea what is happening at the physiological level. Do not call this withdrawal - we don't know what it is. Tell them your symptoms and remind them of the Haemochromatosis and let them treat you. 

 

Rooting for you, 

Omw 

 

PS one more article showing that MH problems result from high ferritin

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8194001/

Thank you for your reply and I’m sorry if I’m taking up so much of your time 

I have had the blood tests done today so I will wait for the results and then act accordingly 

my main symptoms are chronic fatigue chronic headaches depression thirsty all the time the feeling of being cold all the time and very poor sleep which I have read could be a sign of high ferritin 

it maybe I don’t have heamochromatosis but the high ferritin is down to chronic inflammation which points that something is a miss 

all I know is I need so relief from this suffering 

I shall copy up the information you have supplied so when I go back I am well prepared 

thank you again 

[Terry4949]

So went to see my doctor today due to family pressure as my severe wave has probably hit the lowest since I have been off antidepressants my family are now worried for me as my depression anhendonia and suicidal idealations are back with a vengeance and I can understand this intense wave has been nearly 4 weeks now and I have 1 month shy of 7 years off and I am barely functioning plus the constant physical and Adrenalin wakings are the worst in 7 years 

trying to explain to my family that is still withdrawal is very hard as you know so I agreed to visit my gp just to please them before they have me sent to a mental ward 

I told the new doctor about my history and that I had been given a slew of medications over a 30 year period to which one worked for 14 years until I hit tolerance and then all hell ensued then I was given many meds that caused me so Much harm and I have been off 7 years in what I call the worst protracted withdrawal imaginable 

the doctor to my surprise said that he knows that some people have serious trouble coming off antidepressants as he has patients that are indeed having difficulties and he agrees they need to be withdrawn very slowly far more slowly than suggested years ago so at least it is slowly getting through to the doctors about slow tapering 

I then started to tell the doctor about how I’m waking with pins and needles in my face and tongue plus my left side of my body hand leg and foot go numb and burn I explain to him that I have been recently been diagnosed with barrets esophogus and it causes me a lot of discomfort I then explain that for the last 3 years I have had high ferritin in which my blood either had to much iron in it or it is a sign of high inflammation every blood test I have had has been way above the highest range 

I asked politely as if he thought that this maybe adding to my mental health as I’m suffering with these symptoms as well as withdrawal 

The reply I got was that the hospital will look at my bloods again in March he wasn’t sure about all the physical symptoms as I explained to him that there is nothing in the literature for depression saying that these were related to depression 

I’m not saying that they are harm from meds but there maybe a underlying problem 

Symptoms. Burning in mouth and tongue 

constant mucus and post nasal drip 

sore throat 

severe aching muscles in legs 

neuropathy 

headaches especially behind the eyes due to sinuses 

severe fatigue 

feeling cold all the time especially my feet 

very poor sleep 

I tried not to mention the cortisol wakings and the severe depression and anhendonia as to see if he would look at other possibilities 

The reply I got was as follows as much as I believe that you had withdrawals which I know can last a long time 7 years seems a bit extreme I’m not down playing anything you are saying but it just seems that you are having a major depression 

He then said I can see from your notes that you are anti medication to which I replied only because of antidepressants that have made me sensitive to nearly all meds plus supplements not that I am anti medication

i said to him that I believe I had been kindled due to so many med switches in a short space of time and no proper tapering was adhered to he just thought I had lost the plot 

so after all of this he said that maybe he maybe able to give me something to help with the symptoms so I was open to suggestions 

He said would you like to start DULOXETINE 30mg to see if it helps with some of the physical symptoms and you never no it may help with your depression 

I don’t think he listened to a word I was saying 

Feeling even more depressed now 😔

 

 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Terry4949

he was trying to treat your neuropathy with duloxetine - it is a common medicine given for that. 

 

He is not wrong that you have what, based on symptoms, would be classed as depression. The two of your are disagreeing about what that is caused by. You think it is caused by withdrawal (I am not 100% convinced of this) and he thinks it is caused by something that is deemed  'mental health.' I think that it is caused by underlying physical or environmental issues. Psychiatry, in its drive to accept that depression just happens and we should respect all mental illness etc, refuses to investigate the causes behind the depression and wants to treat it symptomatically. I think his heart is (generally) in the right place but this 'fairies caused depression' attitude is not helpful. Fair enough, sometimes depression is caused by psychological issues that to medicine might as well be fairies and medicine is not qualified to understand or treat these except symptomatically. 

Did you show him the articles that I sent you showing that high ferritin causes these symptoms? It is so clear to me that that is what is going on. But it is not a common enough issue that people know enough about. Next time you need to take the NHS list of symptoms for high ferritin as well as the article showing that 25% of people with high ferritin have neuropathies.

 

In the meantime, please do not tell doctors about kindling. We observe hypersensitivity as a symptoms of withdrawal but *WE* call it kindling - in the literature kindling refers to having worse subsequent withdrawals in alcohol withdrawal NOT the hypersensitivity itself- i.e. each subsequent withdrawal becomes more severe. We use a shortcut word - "kindling" to refer to hypersensitivity and that is not accurate. Kindling in alcohol withdrawal is not a common phenomenon and a GP would not be expected to know this. We use shortcuts on the forums so when you use that language with someone outside without explaining what you mean they will think you have lost the plot. Most doctors do not trust patient accounts or understanding of disease partly because there are really outlandish things patients say and do and there is A LOT OF stuff on the Internet that is more outrageous than most of us can even imagine. That is the reason I post scientific articles rather than youtube videos. Think about it: people were drinking bleach to cure Covid-19!

 

So, what to do now? 

You have hit a challenge here with a somewhat WD receptive doctor who wants to help. You need to direct him to investigate the causes of your depression. There is one very common one - the high ferritin and depression is a symptom of it along with the other symptoms that you have enumerated above. You need to send your doctor the NHS link to this along with the articles that I posted earlier. Once you have a record of this, you can follow up with a complaint. What were your ferritin levels at your latest blood tests? 

 

I am also curious about the sinus issues. In your house, do you have a damp problem? I am asking this because in the UK this is very common. The sinus issues could be caused by allergies to mold. You can measure the relative humidity in your house. RH Is above 60% you need to lower that by using a dehumidifier. A simple humidity measuring device. https://www.amazon.co.uk/ThermoPro-TP50-Digital-Thermometer-Temperature/dp/B01H1R0K68/ref=sr_1_5?keywords=relative+humidity&sr=8-5

You can treat sinus issue by using a neti pot regularly and if it is allergy related by eliminating the source of allergies. You could do an allergy test yourself - try taking a non-drowsy antihistamine for a day or two and see if the sinus issues resolve or get better. Yes, it is risky taking an allergy med in withdrawal but it is unlikely you will get allergy testing at your GP's quickly. 

 

So, what I see here is that you have hit a bit of a challenge in communicating with the GP but that is not irreversible and you can still get good care. But you also need to be open to solutions other than "it's withdrawal." Withdrawal should be the last diagnosis after everything has been exhausted. It is not impossible that it is withdrawal but given the other issues, I am hesitant to give up investigating. 

 

I know you had high hopes for this @Terry4949 and it didn't go the way we hoped. But we have a doctor who is willing to listen and we just need to direct him to investigate. This is just a challenge, it is not the end of the road! 

Sending you hugs! We will figure it out. 

OMW

 

 

 

 

[Terry4949]

13 minutes ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @Terry4949

he was trying to treat your neuropathy with duloxetine - it is a common medicine given for that. 

 

He is not wrong that you have what, based on symptoms, would be classed as depression. The two of your are disagreeing about what that is caused by. You think it is caused by withdrawal (I am not 100% convinced of this) and he thinks it is caused by something that is deemed  'mental health.' I think that it is caused by underlying physical or environmental issues. Psychiatry, in its drive to accept that depression just happens and we should respect all mental illness etc, refuses to investigate the causes behind the depression and wants to treat it symptomatically. I think his heart is (generally) in the right place but this 'fairies caused depression' attitude is not helpful. Fair enough, sometimes depression is caused by psychological issues that to medicine might as well be fairies and medicine is not qualified to understand or treat these except symptomatically. 

Did you show him the articles that I sent you showing that high ferritin causes these symptoms? It is so clear to me that that is what is going on. But it is not a common enough issue that people know enough about. Next time you need to take the NHS list of symptoms for high ferritin as well as the article showing that 25% of people with high ferritin have neuropathies.

 

In the meantime, please do not tell doctors about kindling. We observe hypersensitivity as a symptoms of withdrawal but *WE* call it kindling - in the literature kindling refers to having worse subsequent withdrawals in alcohol withdrawal NOT the hypersensitivity itself- i.e. each subsequent withdrawal becomes more severe. We use a shortcut word - "kindling" to refer to hypersensitivity and that is not accurate. Kindling in alcohol withdrawal is not a common phenomenon and a GP would not be expected to know this. We use shortcuts on the forums so when you use that language with someone outside without explaining what you mean they will think you have lost the plot. Most doctors do not trust patient accounts or understanding of disease partly because there are really outlandish things patients say and do and there is A LOT OF stuff on the Internet that is more outrageous than most of us can even imagine. That is the reason I post scientific articles rather than youtube videos. Think about it: people were drinking bleach to cure Covid-19!

 

So, what to do now? 

You have hit a challenge here with a somewhat WD receptive doctor who wants to help. You need to direct him to investigate the causes of your depression. There is one very common one - the high ferritin and depression is a symptom of it along with the other symptoms that you have enumerated above. You need to send your doctor the NHS link to this along with the articles that I posted earlier. Once you have a record of this, you can follow up with a complaint. What were your ferritin levels at your latest blood tests? 

 

I am also curious about the sinus issues. In your house, do you have a damp problem? I am asking this because in the UK this is very common. The sinus issues could be caused by allergies to mold. You can measure the relative humidity in your house. RH Is above 60% you need to lower that by using a dehumidifier. A simple humidity measuring device. https://www.amazon.co.uk/ThermoPro-TP50-Digital-Thermometer-Temperature/dp/B01H1R0K68/ref=sr_1_5?keywords=relative+humidity&sr=8-5

You can treat sinus issue by using a neti pot regularly and if it is allergy related by eliminating the source of allergies. You could do an allergy test yourself - try taking a non-drowsy antihistamine for a day or two and see if the sinus issues resolve or get better. Yes, it is risky taking an allergy med in withdrawal but it is unlikely you will get allergy testing at your GP's quickly. 

 

So, what I see here is that you have hit a bit of a challenge in communicating with the GP but that is not irreversible and you can still get good care. But you also need to be open to solutions other than "it's withdrawal." Withdrawal should be the last diagnosis after everything has been exhausted. It is not impossible that it is withdrawal but given the other issues, I am hesitant to give up investigating. 

 

I know you had high hopes for this @Terry4949 and it didn't go the way we hoped. But we have a doctor who is willing to listen and we just need to direct him to investigate. This is just a challenge, it is not the end of the road! 

Sending you hugs! We will figure it out. 

OMW

 

 

 

 

Thank you for your very detailed reply 

I did not show him the article about high ferritin I only informed him verbally that it maybe a possible cause as I have had it for a long time but next time I go I will print the appropriate information 

I am yet to get the blood test results back that I had the other day but I will phone today but the ferritin level was not on that one I have that again in March 

l didn’t realise about the kindling so I’m glad you have pointed that out probably the reason the doctor looked at me strangely 

 

as for the sinus issues I have had this for a ver6 long time 3-4 years but it has slowly got worse I have constant mucus at the back of my throat which I feel the need to swallow all the time plus my nose is always running and feels cold inside it gives me a cough my sinuses feel dry but burn especially in the mornings 

I have barrets esophogus so it could be from silent gerd the mucus is very clear which shows no sign of infection 

I have no mold in the house or damp problems and I have tried a neti pot many times plus antibiotics and steroid nasal sprays but to no avail 

I did try Claritin for a few days but that just seems to make my neuropathic symptoms worse ramps them up rather than eliminate anything so I am reluctant to use them 

I have not had a allergy test done so maybe that’s something I could look into I have 2 humidifiers in my house 

 

I think that a lot of my fatigue is because of the sinus issue that maybe makes me feel more depressed so I bounce one of the other but the anhendonia is very difficult to try to make any effort even though I know I should 

I will ring for my blood tests today and then move on from there

Thank you for replying to me it does give me some reason to believe there is some hope 

just wish I didn’t feel so bad all the time a window would help 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Terry4949 totally understandable that you are feeling down given how much you are suffering with all of these health issues. They don't seem serious on the surface (like cancer) but the constant nasal issues and ferritin would grind down anybody. I am really sorry you are going through that. 

 

For the allergies - do you have humidifiers or dehumidifiers? In the UK nobody needs humidifiers - outside humidity is usually 80% so you may be creating more damp and invisible mold. Most UK houses need dehumidifiers. I am allergic to alternaria (invisible mold) and am so sensitive can smell mold weeks before anyone else can and the way I got this was when I basically put humidifiers in my room because I had sinus issues. You could also be allergic to dust mites. That is a worse one because it is really hard to get rid of dust mites but not impossible - you need to get rid of carpeting etc. But if steroid sprays didn't help I am not sure what it might be. They should stop the inflammation no matter what causes it. May be worth checking with the GP on what tests they can do - some of them are simply blood tests that he can order without referral. 

 

Barrett's esophagus would not cause GERD but you may have GERD from other causes - for example an H-Pylori infection (very common). This can be tested using tests from Amazon and treated with antibiotics if need be. 

 

It may be worth emailing the doctor again with the two different issues. Do you have an online platform where you can put in your symptoms/complaints? If so, let's write the text together so that the direction is to find the underlying causes of this rather than focused on the depression. 

 

Unfortunately, doctors often see ONLY depression once it's in the patient's record but we can show our evidence. 

 

OMW

[RachelSusan]

@Terry4949 Hi Terry, I am sure you were disappointed in the visit, however it does sound to me as if he was somewhat open though. He sadly went back to the usual standby of reaching for the drugs which always saddens us.  Is this someone you would be willing to work with?  I know that for me if I spend a little time with a doctor and bring them along slowly it does get to the point where they can be more helpful.  If it was such a turn off with the offer of the Duloxetine then I could understand why you wouldn't return. For me I have had doctors that even able to even entertain the idea of any withdrawal so that when a doctor comes along that even acknowledges it I am very pleased. And I am not saying you are going through withdrawal or not, I don't know, I just like doctors that even acknowledge it exists. I know you have a lot going on with your health, I hope you are able to see some improvement soon.

Edited February 2 by RachelSusan

[Terry4949]

8 hours ago, RachelSusan said:

@Terry4949 Hi Terry, I am sure you were disappointed in the visit, however it does sound to me as if he was somewhat open though. He sadly went back to the usual standby of reaching for the drugs which always saddens us.  Is this someone you would be willing to work with?  I know that for me if I spend a little time with a doctor and bring them along slowly it does get to the point where they can be more helpful.  If it was such a turn off with the offer of the Duloxetine then I could understand why you wouldn't return. For me I have had doctors that even able to even entertain the idea of any withdrawal so that when a doctor comes along that even acknowledges it I am very pleased. And I am not saying you are going through withdrawal or not, I don't know, I just like doctors that even acknowledge it exists. I know you have a lot going on with your health, I hope you are able to see some improvement soon.

Thank you for your reply 

all I know is I have had a constant battle with my sinuses for a few years now every day I get facial pain and headaches plus the constant clearing of the throat and runny nose is awful the cold weather doesn’t help and I’m sure it’s what makes me so fatigued 

But I have been managing to get through the days until about 4 weeks ago when I got hit with this overwhelming depression that has left me so flat and empty inside I don’t know wether it’s more anhendonic or apathy but it is truly a awful feeling of emptiness there literally is no joy or anything even though I push myself to wash dress go out for a walk socialise as best as I can 

The trouble here in the uk is you never see the same doctor twice so it’s hard to build up a relationship 

The phyciatrist just wants me back on medication and keeps telling my family it’s the only way I’m going to get better so when you tell them and even show them that medication has and can harm people they say I’m not trying 

my wife says to me even paracetamol have side effects but people still take them it’s so hard convincing them that I have been harmed by them especially a fire what happened to me after taking mirtazapine 

I’m just hoping that things will change for the better soon as I fear that my family will force me to take something as they think that 7 years without medication and I’m worse now than ever 

I hope that you are making good progress with your healing 

Thank you for reaching out to me 

[getofflex]

Terry my heart goes out to you about your depression.  I know how painful this is, as I've been through it myself.  

5 hours ago, Terry4949 said:

The phyciatrist just wants me back on medication and keeps telling my family it’s the only way I’m going to get better so when you tell them and even show them that medication has and can harm people they say I’m not trying 

 

5 hours ago, Terry4949 said:

I fear that my family will force me to take something

I'm very sorry to hear that your family and doctor are prone to coercing you to take these drugs.  You have the right to resist, and do not allow them to do this.  

 

What things have you tried, other than drugs, to deal with the depression?  Have you been to a therapist?  

 

It is quite possible that the short dark days of winter are exacerbating your depression.  

 

I'm currently working on a CBT book called "The Feeling Good Handbook" by David D Burns.  It is a thick book, but I'm just working in the chapter on depression.  It is simple and straightforward, and works on the premise that a lot of our depression is caused by faulty ways of thinking.  I also take daily walks outside, and this helps a lot.  Even on cold days, I layer and bundle up, and go outside and walk.  

Edited February 3 by getofflex

[RachelSusan]

@Terry4949 I have the same sinus problem. It is very painful. I don't have the clearing of the throat but I have the constant pressure. Boy does it hurt. Sometimes when I lay down I can't breath.

 

I did not know that in the UK you didn't always see the same doctor. That certainly.

makes things more difficult.

 

You used to be on this site a lot more and then it seemed you got quite for a while. Or maybe you were here and I just didn't see your posts? I don't know. I have been wondering what happened to you. I am sorry for your current troubles but it is nice to see your posts again.

[member21]

16 hours ago, getofflex said:

 

I'm currently working on a CBT book called "The Feeling Good Handbook" by David D Burns.  It is a thick book, but I'm just working in the chapter on depression.  It is simple and straightforward, and works on the premise that a lot of our depression is caused by faulty ways of thinking. 

I have also stumbled upon it.

 

They say that it was found in an experiment in 1980s that even 4 weeks of reading and following this book can lead to becoming and remaining depression free(without medicines)

[Terry4949]

On 2/2/2024 at 10:44 PM, RachelSusan said:

@Terry4949 Hi Terry, I am sure you were disappointed in the visit, however it does sound to me as if he was somewhat open though. He sadly went back to the usual standby of reaching for the drugs which always saddens us.  Is this someone you would be willing to work with?  I know that for me if I spend a little time with a doctor and bring them along slowly it does get to the point where they can be more helpful.  If it was such a turn off with the offer of the Duloxetine then I could understand why you wouldn't return. For me I have had doctors that even able to even entertain the idea of any withdrawal so that when a doctor comes along that even acknowledges it I am very pleased. And I am not saying you are going through withdrawal or not, I don't know, I just like doctors that even acknowledge it exists. I know you have a lot going on with your health, I hope you are able to see some improvement soon.

Thank you for reply the doctor I saw was ok but I don’t think he believes that after 7 years off all meds that it’s withdrawal but at least he did acknowledge that coming off is not easy 

The thought of trying something else does cross my mind this far out and 7 years is a long time of suffering but do I want to give that 7 years up and I kno w it would be a crap shoot as to if anything would work as all the meds thrown at me after hitting tolerance never made a dent on me only made things worse

My wife seems to think that now I have been off all these years that maybe a med might work as she believes that my brain has healed and this is just normal depression 

I have exhausted so many things from exercise no alcohol no smoking I eat a balanced diet no sugar talking therapies acupuncture mindfulness meditation breathing the list is is endless 

my health problems don’t help I know that but the one thing I just can’t get any relief from is this dam depression and anhendonia 

I hope that you are doing well and I wish you all the healing in the world 

[Terry4949]

On 2/3/2024 at 1:11 PM, getofflex said:

Terry my heart goes out to you about your depression.  I know how painful this is, as I've been through it myself.  

 

I'm very sorry to hear that your family and doctor are prone to coercing you to take these drugs.  You have the right to resist, and do not allow them to do this.  

 

What things have you tried, other than drugs, to deal with the depression?  Have you been to a therapist?  

 

It is quite possible that the short dark days of winter are exacerbating your depression.  

 

I'm currently working on a CBT book called "The Feeling Good Handbook" by David D Burns.  It is a thick book, but I'm just working in the chapter on depression.  It is simple and straightforward, and works on the premise that a lot of our depression is caused by faulty ways of thinking.  I also take daily walks outside, and this helps a lot.  Even on cold days, I layer and bundle up, and go outside and walk.  

Thankyou for your reply 

I have tried talk therapy plus therapist but to be honest not many of them understand withdrawal depression 

I think a lot of the hopelessness comes from the fact it’s withdrawal depression and that I don’t have any trauma that is link with it the withdrawal depression is far deeper and darker than any depression I have ever had it goes beyond low mood and I think because it has been a main stay of my withdrawal it now drags anhendonia with it 

I do go out every day for a walk I’m fortunate where I live i have a lot of fields that surround me but again my soul focus is on how I’m feeling most of my walks I don’t even look at what is around me as I’m so rapped up in my head so it just feels like chore I can’t seem to break that chain 

I hate the dark days truly I do I know they don’t help I’m usually up by 3 am as I can’t sleep then look out side and it is dark until just before 8am this I know depresses me I think my carcadium clock is so out of whack now as my sleep is dreadful and I practise perfect bedtime sleep hygiene but in 7 years it has never returned to normal 

I agree with you about depression being caused by a faulty way of thinking everyday just seems the same the only relief I get is at 9.30 pm when I know I can get in my bed and I know I will sleep for 3 hours and then I wake to the same thing and same thoughts day after day but I just can’t to seem to be able to break th at cycle no matter what I do 

Thank you for replying to me

i wish you all the healing I the world 

[Terry4949]

On 2/3/2024 at 7:30 PM, RachelSusan said:

@Terry4949 I have the same sinus problem. It is very painful. I don't have the clearing of the throat but I have the constant pressure. Boy does it hurt. Sometimes when I lay down I can't breath.

 

I did not know that in the UK you didn't always see the same doctor. That certainly.

makes things more difficult.

 

You used to be on this site a lot more and then it seemed you got quite for a while. Or maybe you were here and I just didn't see your posts? I don't know. I have been wondering what happened to you. I am sorry for your current troubles but it is nice to see your posts again.

The sinus problem I have had for 3-4 years but at first it was just like a blocked nose but then as time went on I started to get terrible facial pain behind the bridge of the nose my teeth would hurt and so many headaches 

I was sent to the ENT and they said that the nose was clear and no obstruction so the gave me some antibiotics and steroid nose sprays but they didn’t do anything 

now I have a constant cough post nasal drip constant drives me barmy and ( sorry if this seems disgusting ) a thick clear mucus at the back of my throat constant 

 

I  tried to have a break from the site as I thought that maybe reading so much suffering was not helping my depression but in all honesty it’s probably the only place I can come to get reassurance that I’m not going mad 

the only time I want to be on here is to write a success story to be honest 

usually when I’m on here it’s because I suffering 

I hope you are doing much better and full healing is near 

thank you for reaching out to me 

[Terry4949]

this relentless wave is pushing me to the limit now I cannot catch a break from the relentless depression and the anxiety is off the scale just want to cry all the time just feel so hopeless at 7 years off I truly don’t know how much more I can endure I’m so tempted to go back to a a/d just to see if I can stabilise or just to get some relief I know this is a site for coming of meds and don’t encourage the use of them but I don’t know how much more time I can give this withdrawal suffering 

I’m sorry for being so negative but this is no life 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Terry4949

We are a site for going off of meds but you're your own decision maker. Your body, your choice. We can't help if things go wrong though, unfortunately. 

Edit: didn't mean the above as we will abandon you but as in we really can't as it's not our expertise. You'll have to work with a psychiatrist or your GP to get better then. 

 

Omw

Edited February 9 by Onmyway