Littlegrandma Posted December 30, 2017 Author Share Posted December 30, 2017 Unless it was from this morning. I just wrote you back Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted December 30, 2017 Moderator Share Posted December 30, 2017 3 minutes ago, Littlegrandma said: Unless it was from this morning. I just wrote you back Yup that's it. I wrote you back. Go to bed. Sleep well tonight. Hugs. Take care, Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 30, 2017 Author Share Posted December 30, 2017 i tapered lexapro this morning. 5 mg to 4.8. I was so nervous, I was shaking. I feel so sick this afternoon. Like I’m hungover but still drunk. Wobbly, shaky, foggy and anxiety over the top. I should not feel effects this quick. Should I? Could I have let my anxiety get so out of control that I feel this bad? My first taper I did not have any side effects til the 4th day. This kind of anxiety is what led me to lexapro in the first place. But still not at this level. Am I ever going to be able to control this anxiety without drugs? I try yoga, meditation, breathing etc etc. The dp/ dr is so bad that I find it hard to do any kind of relaxation techniques. I’m becoming so agoraphobic that I can’t go to the gym or stores to get any kind of exercise. And it’s below zero wind chills. Can’t walk outside. Today was the first time out of the house in a week. And it was to a party with 35 loud, happy, drinking people. I could hardly form a thought to have a conversation. This is is such a cruel joke. I keep thinking I’ll awaken from this nightmare. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Scorpio Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 Hi lg im so sorry you are suffering. It’s probably a mix of Christmas stress, the cold you caught and the party today. I know what hell you are going through but keep hanging on - we both have to - it will ease. 2006 After sudden death of mother put on 20mg of citaloprom for depression. 2014 Drug stopped working after two weeks of panic attacks felt fine. Aug 2014. Doctor put me on lyrica for rash on face, diarrhoea, sleeplessness,muscle cramp, bruising. Initial dose too strong, halved dose. Stopped taking it 22/10/14 2014 severe anxiety after several ssri's attempted, seem to have developed severe sensitivity to any drug, but giving severe reactions put on cipralex drop form.started on 2 drops and had to increase by 1 drop every 3 days. Eventually got to 12 drops and had to stop as side effects every step of the way dreadful. Psychiatrist kept telling me to stick with it and my body would get used to it. Eventually down to 8 drops. Bad reactions throughout the time I was on it Have been on this until may 2017. Stopped over two weeks. Felt fine for 5 weeks after initial dizziness, nightmares, nausea, insomnia. Given diazepam by gp and told to take them when anxiety bad. Have only taken them very rarely as they frighten me. Last two weeks severe anxiety returned and feeling hopeless 11July 2017. Cipralex 2mg. Anxiety, nausea still severe 13 July 2017 Cipralex 1mg due to advice of too high dosage by kind person on thus site. so dropped from 2mg to 1mg and feelings of anxiety still at severe. As well as nausea, headaches, fatigue. 15 July still feeling extremely anxious verging on panic. Nausea, feelings of fainting, fatigue. Lots of head pains 3 August. Three weeks into trying to stabilise on one drop of cipralex. Still have waking from 4am. Sporadic upset stomach. Nausea. High anxiety. Throbbing/burning in nether regions seems to have eased for time being but stabbing/burning in calves of legs. Tinnitus. Occasional half to whole better days but mainly still struggling. Fatigue Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 30, 2017 Author Share Posted December 30, 2017 Thank you, my friend. I hope you feel some relief today. I’m always thinking about you. I’m sure you’re right. I just can’t get control over the anxiety. It’s such a vicious circle. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Scorpio Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 I know it goes on and on. No relief but it has to get better sometime same as blue skies and bluebirds will come back. We have gales and driving rain the other day snow. I hate this time of year. It’s not helping either of us. Xx 2006 After sudden death of mother put on 20mg of citaloprom for depression. 2014 Drug stopped working after two weeks of panic attacks felt fine. Aug 2014. Doctor put me on lyrica for rash on face, diarrhoea, sleeplessness,muscle cramp, bruising. Initial dose too strong, halved dose. Stopped taking it 22/10/14 2014 severe anxiety after several ssri's attempted, seem to have developed severe sensitivity to any drug, but giving severe reactions put on cipralex drop form.started on 2 drops and had to increase by 1 drop every 3 days. Eventually got to 12 drops and had to stop as side effects every step of the way dreadful. Psychiatrist kept telling me to stick with it and my body would get used to it. Eventually down to 8 drops. Bad reactions throughout the time I was on it Have been on this until may 2017. Stopped over two weeks. Felt fine for 5 weeks after initial dizziness, nightmares, nausea, insomnia. Given diazepam by gp and told to take them when anxiety bad. Have only taken them very rarely as they frighten me. Last two weeks severe anxiety returned and feeling hopeless 11July 2017. Cipralex 2mg. Anxiety, nausea still severe 13 July 2017 Cipralex 1mg due to advice of too high dosage by kind person on thus site. so dropped from 2mg to 1mg and feelings of anxiety still at severe. As well as nausea, headaches, fatigue. 15 July still feeling extremely anxious verging on panic. Nausea, feelings of fainting, fatigue. Lots of head pains 3 August. Three weeks into trying to stabilise on one drop of cipralex. Still have waking from 4am. Sporadic upset stomach. Nausea. High anxiety. Throbbing/burning in nether regions seems to have eased for time being but stabbing/burning in calves of legs. Tinnitus. Occasional half to whole better days but mainly still struggling. Fatigue Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 30, 2017 Author Share Posted December 30, 2017 Told you I’d meet you at the beach. My California and Florida friends sent me sunrise pictures on the beach Christmas morning. I think that’s what we need. Yesterday my husband said I should go. The thought of the airport gave me a panic attack. I’ll wait for the bluebirds to come back to Illinois. Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Scorpio Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 The airport would give me a panic attack too. Ok will have to wait for the summer here except we don’t get summer we get weather - we can have four seasons in a day. As long as I can get rid of the thermals and put flip flops or sandals on I will feel better. Im going to bed and praying this dry cough gives up and leaves me in peace. If I steam my head anymore you can eat me Christmas next year as pickled head. Hope your day improves and the anxiety gives us both a break I haven’t been out the door since last Saturday. ‘Huge hugs my friend 2006 After sudden death of mother put on 20mg of citaloprom for depression. 2014 Drug stopped working after two weeks of panic attacks felt fine. Aug 2014. Doctor put me on lyrica for rash on face, diarrhoea, sleeplessness,muscle cramp, bruising. Initial dose too strong, halved dose. Stopped taking it 22/10/14 2014 severe anxiety after several ssri's attempted, seem to have developed severe sensitivity to any drug, but giving severe reactions put on cipralex drop form.started on 2 drops and had to increase by 1 drop every 3 days. Eventually got to 12 drops and had to stop as side effects every step of the way dreadful. Psychiatrist kept telling me to stick with it and my body would get used to it. Eventually down to 8 drops. Bad reactions throughout the time I was on it Have been on this until may 2017. Stopped over two weeks. Felt fine for 5 weeks after initial dizziness, nightmares, nausea, insomnia. Given diazepam by gp and told to take them when anxiety bad. Have only taken them very rarely as they frighten me. Last two weeks severe anxiety returned and feeling hopeless 11July 2017. Cipralex 2mg. Anxiety, nausea still severe 13 July 2017 Cipralex 1mg due to advice of too high dosage by kind person on thus site. so dropped from 2mg to 1mg and feelings of anxiety still at severe. As well as nausea, headaches, fatigue. 15 July still feeling extremely anxious verging on panic. Nausea, feelings of fainting, fatigue. Lots of head pains 3 August. Three weeks into trying to stabilise on one drop of cipralex. Still have waking from 4am. Sporadic upset stomach. Nausea. High anxiety. Throbbing/burning in nether regions seems to have eased for time being but stabbing/burning in calves of legs. Tinnitus. Occasional half to whole better days but mainly still struggling. Fatigue Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted December 31, 2017 Moderator Share Posted December 31, 2017 17 hours ago, Littlegrandma said: i tapered lexapro this morning. 5 mg to 4.8. I was so nervous, I was shaking. I feel so sick this afternoon. Like I’m hungover but still drunk. Wobbly, shaky, foggy and anxiety over the top. I should not feel effects this quick. Should I? Could I have let my anxiety get so out of control that I feel this bad? My first taper I did not have any side effects til the 4th day. This kind of anxiety is what led me to lexapro in the first place. But still not at this level. Am I ever going to be able to control this anxiety without drugs? I try yoga, meditation, breathing etc etc. The dp/ dr is so bad that I find it hard to do any kind of relaxation techniques. I’m becoming so agoraphobic that I can’t go to the gym or stores to get any kind of exercise. And it’s below zero wind chills. Can’t walk outside. Today was the first time out of the house in a week. And it was to a party with 35 loud, happy, drinking people. I could hardly form a thought to have a conversation. This is is such a cruel joke. I keep thinking I’ll awaken from this nightmare. Lg LG: I'm so sorry you had such a horrible experience the 1st day of tapering. I wonder if you had anxiety knowing you were going to taper. I don't know, I'm not a dr or a mod. They say usually you don't have side effects until the 4th day like you said. You were having a lot of anxiety knowing you had to go to that party too. I wonder if that amped it up. And then all the people drinking and laughing just didn't help. I know how you feel about not wanting to go out. I don't either. I like being home in my safe place. Look what I did getting out and trying to keep busy. I screwed up big time. At least you are smart enough to take your meds lol... Next weekend my fiancé wants to go to our hometown to spend the weekend with his mom and dad. That means I have to leave Brownie at my Uncles there. I won't have her with me. That makes me anxious just thinking about it. I have to get up early and go to my Uncles and feed her and then stop by here and there and hold her and check on her. As you can see, I'm not looking forward to it. I hope today is better for you. Maybe being home will calm you down. I PM'd you yesterday. If you feel like reading it. I will be thinking of you, hoping you are doing ok. Hugs. Take care, Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 31, 2017 Author Share Posted December 31, 2017 2 minutes ago, Frogie said: LG: I'm so sorry you had such a horrible experience the 1st day of tapering. I wonder if you had anxiety knowing you were going to taper. I don't know, I'm not a dr or a mod. They say usually you don't have side effects until the 4th day like you said. You were having a lot of anxiety knowing you had to go to that party too. I wonder if that amped it up. And then all the people drinking and laughing just didn't help. I know how you feel about not wanting to go out. I don't either. I like being home in my safe place. Look what I did getting out and trying to keep busy. I screwed up big time. At least you are smart enough to take your meds lol... Next weekend my fiancé wants to go to our hometown to spend the weekend with his mom and dad. That means I have to leave Brownie at my Uncles there. I won't have her with me. That makes me anxious just thinking about it. I have to get up early and go to my Uncles and feed her and then stop by here and there and hold her and check on her. As you can see, I'm not looking forward to it. I hope today is better for you. Maybe being home will calm you down. I PM'd you yesterday. If you feel like reading it. I will be thinking of you, hoping you are doing ok. Hugs. Take care, Frogie xx Good morning Frogie I don’t know why I don’t get half my notifications for messages. I will check it out. Oh, I’m pretty sure it was my anxiety of the taper. I trembled the whole time. It took a good 5 min before I thought I had it right. I just couldn’t recover the rest of the day. Today I’m a bit calmer but so nauseous. That usually starts after I take the lexapro. My husband and I took a drive last night to look at the last weekend of Christmas lights. I couldn’t wait to get home. So sad. My eyes were hurting and blurry and so nauseous I couldn’t enjoy it. Can’t wait til I can sit or walk in the warm sun. It’s 1 degree right now. Not fit for lady in wd or beast. May be good for you to get away for the weekend. You can’t keep Brownie with you at in laws house? Does your uncle live pretty close to them? Yeah. That will be a bit of an inconvenience. The things we do for our kids:) how are you doing today? I hope your anxiety has let up. Any word yet when your granddaughter will come to stay with you? Can you bring her back after your visit next weekend? She would be good company for Brownie on the drive. Take care. I’ll check my PM. xx Lg Hugs Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted December 31, 2017 Moderator Share Posted December 31, 2017 4 minutes ago, Littlegrandma said: Good morning Frogie I don’t know why I don’t get half my notifications for messages. I will check it out. Oh, I’m pretty sure it was my anxiety of the taper. I trembled the whole time. It took a good 5 min before I thought I had it right. I just couldn’t recover the rest of the day. Today I’m a bit calmer but so nauseous. That usually starts after I take the lexapro. My husband and I took a drive last night to look at the last weekend of Christmas lights. I couldn’t wait to get home. So sad. My eyes were hurting and blurry and so nauseous I couldn’t enjoy it. Can’t wait til I can sit or walk in the warm sun. It’s 1 degree right now. Not fit for lady in wd or beast. May be good for you to get away for the weekend. You can’t keep Brownie with you at in laws house? Does your uncle live pretty close to them? Yeah. That will be a bit of an inconvenience. The things we do for our kids:) how are you doing today? I hope your anxiety has let up. Any word yet when your granddaughter will come to stay with you? Can you bring her back after your visit next weekend? She would be good company for Brownie on the drive. Take care. I’ll check my PM. xx Lg Hugs That's a bummer you went for a drive to check out the Christmas lights and couldn't enjoy it. But I would be the same way right now. Are you still nauseous this morning? Brownie would just bark all weekend at the in laws. And his dad likes to tease her. My Uncle lives about 10 minutes away, so not bad. I just don't want to go. But I know I have too. So now my anxiety it reving up just knowing I have to go. I don't want to make the 2 1/2 hour drive until I know we are moving. But oh well. I text my daughter in law again yesterday and nothing. But if I text I had a million dollars for them she would be calling before I set the phone down. Pretty sad. That could be some of my anxiety. I've got some anxiety this morning, but it's not as bad as it has been last week. And my blood pressure is back to normal. I'm not touching the cuff for a while now. I'm pretty sure that was a lot of my anxiety too. I hope you feel better today. It's cold here too. Yesterday it never got past 6 and this morning it's 6 again. Supposed to be 14 but I don't think it will make it. Tomorrow supposed to be in the 20's, I just wish it would snow! Stay in and stay warm. Hugs. Take care, Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 31, 2017 Author Share Posted December 31, 2017 3 minutes ago, Frogie said: That's a bummer you went for a drive to check out the Christmas lights and couldn't enjoy it. But I would be the same way right now. Are you still nauseous this morning? Brownie would just bark all weekend at the in laws. And his dad likes to tease her. My Uncle lives about 10 minutes away, so not bad. I just don't want to go. But I know I have too. So now my anxiety it reving up just knowing I have to go. I don't want to make the 2 1/2 hour drive until I know we are moving. But oh well. I text my daughter in law again yesterday and nothing. But if I text I had a million dollars for them she would be calling before I set the phone down. Pretty sad. That could be some of my anxiety. I've got some anxiety this morning, but it's not as bad as it has been last week. And my blood pressure is back to normal. I'm not touching the cuff for a while now. I'm pretty sure that was a lot of my anxiety too. I hope you feel better today. It's cold here too. Yesterday it never got past 6 and this morning it's 6 again. Supposed to be 14 but I don't think it will make it. Tomorrow supposed to be in the 20's, I just wish it would snow! Stay in and stay warm. Hugs. Take care, Frogie xx I’m just watching the weather right now. Record low tomorrow. -15. That’s not the windchill. Brrr i understand about the anxiety and apprehension when it comes to making plans. Not too long ago, I would have had my bags packed in 5 minutes. Now I would stare at my stuff for hours and wonder what to pack and cry cuz I don’t want to go. Hopefully the drive will be relaxing for you and you have a nice visit. Maybe it’s just what you need. What is is wrong with your daughter in law? She hasn’t been spanked in awhile. Shame on her. Don’t give up. Happy New Year i know what you’re doing tonight. Same as me. Won’t see midnight. xx. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted December 31, 2017 Moderator Share Posted December 31, 2017 1 minute ago, Littlegrandma said: I’m just watching the weather right now. Record low tomorrow. -15. That’s not the windchill. Brrr i understand about the anxiety and apprehension when it comes to making plans. Not too long ago, I would have had my bags packed in 5 minutes. Now I would stare at my stuff for hours and wonder what to pack and cry cuz I don’t want to go. Hopefully the drive will be relaxing for you and you have a nice visit. Maybe it’s just what you need. What is is wrong with your daughter in law? She hasn’t been spanked in awhile. Shame on her. Don’t give up. Happy New Year i know what you’re doing tonight. Same as me. Won’t see midnight. xx. Lg You are so right. My daughter in law needs to respect me just a little. But she won't. Makes it hard. I just don't want to go. I don't want to leave Brownie. I know I'll be ok when I get there. But I'll stand there and cry, just like you. That's cold. We have a wind chill advisory out, so it could be below zero with it. I won't see midnight. Last night we were in bed before 8:30. That's sad. Happy New Year to you. Take care and stay warm. Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 31, 2017 Author Share Posted December 31, 2017 I made it til 9:30 last night. Shooting for 10 tonight. Remember when New Year’s Eve was a big to do? We had many parties. Then it got to friends and family calling at midnight. Now they know they shouldn’t call past 8:30 or 9. We will celebrate again soon. Next year I’ll call ya at midnight with a glass of champagne in my hand. I was jealous at the party yesterday when the cork was popped and the champagne was pouring at noon. The good old days!! you will be fine. You’ll have a good time once you hit the road. If you’re brain is like my current one, you better start packing now. Call your daughterinlaw today. Or I will. jk hugs Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted December 31, 2017 Moderator Share Posted December 31, 2017 7 minutes ago, Littlegrandma said: I made it til 9:30 last night. Shooting for 10 tonight. Remember when New Year’s Eve was a big to do? We had many parties. Then it got to friends and family calling at midnight. Now they know they shouldn’t call past 8:30 or 9. We will celebrate again soon. Next year I’ll call ya at midnight with a glass of champagne in my hand. I was jealous at the party yesterday when the cork was popped and the champagne was pouring at noon. The good old days!! you will be fine. You’ll have a good time once you hit the road. If you’re brain is like my current one, you better start packing now. Call your daughterinlaw today. Or I will. jk hugs Lg Oh yeah, all the parties we had. People text me at midnight but I never hear the phone lol... I hope I'll be ok. The though of not having Brownie for 2 nights is breaking my heart. She's fine, loves my uncle, but was crying fir me this morning. I should have started packing last week lol... I just don't want to go. I will try to get a hold of my daughter in law today. Stay warm. Hugs, Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted December 31, 2017 Author Share Posted December 31, 2017 Yay. You deserve to see your granddaughter. Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted December 31, 2017 Moderator Share Posted December 31, 2017 8 minutes ago, Littlegrandma said: Yay. You deserve to see your granddaughter. Thanks... PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
JS11 Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 Hi LG, I just wanted to say hello and I'm sorry that the first day of the New Year finds you with a boatload of anxiety. I see you went from 5mg to 4.8mgs and had almost immediate anxiety. Rotten, nasty withdrawal! That is one reason I went off the liquid, although for accuracy's sake, it is so much better than cutting up or gnawing little chunks off of pills. This summer, (before I found this site), I was doing part tablet and part prescription liquid. Almost immediately after I sucked the liquid down, it was instant anxiety. My heart was pounding and felt like it was going to pop out. A part of me wanted it to as maybe that would take the feelings away. It is so very frightening. The pharmacist told me that yes, it is rapidly absorbed. Ahmen to that one! I think you and many of us, have become very sensitive souls. That doesn't make it any easier when you feel the way you do. I know it doesn't for me, but know that I am rooting for you. Take care, and may your symptoms let up soon, JS 26 years of Anti-depressants (probably 32, lost track, alone and/in combination Vyvanse 30mg Discontinued Feb. 22, 2013 Topamax 25-75mg Feb 23, 2013--Feb 2016 0.0 mg Discontinued Lamotrigine 25-50mg Jan 15, 2016-Adverse Reaction Discontinued Feb 2, 2016 T3 25-50mcg Feb.11, 2016 Discontinued April 23, 2016 Escitalopram 20mg-omg fast taper Nov. 2015-Jan.7, 2016 Crash! Reinstated 20mg Taper Jan 14, 2016 0.0mg Sept 2016 Reinstated Feb.21, 2017 Escitalopram 5mg Dosage Adjustments Escitalopram to 2.5mg June 28-30; Increased to 3.75mg July 1-28, 2017 July 29-Aug 4 10mg, alternated between 5 and 10mg next couple days. Aug 9, 7.25mg; Aug 10-14 10mg; Aug 15-25 7.25mg, August 25-29, 10mg. Levofloxacin (January 2017 2 doses) (Adverse Reaction: Neurotoxcity; 3 daysE.R.$30k+tests) Adderall 25mgXR (start April 23, 2013) (Nov.2016 20mg) (Dec.2016 15mg) (Feb. 5, 2016 10mg) (June 15, 2017) 5mg XR Crossover July 7 to Adderall I.M 5mg Discontinued Reinstated Adderall 5mgXR July 28th Minipress 1mg began July 20-23, 2mg July 24 last dose Discontinued (Prescribed to assist with side-effects of updose of Escitalopram) WellbutrinXR 150 mg July 24, 2017 Discontinued; Hydroxyline 25-200 mg daily, began July 20, Discontnued; (Prescribed for side-effects-sensitized; W/D)Gababentin 100mg August 28, 8/29: 00mg, 8/30/17 100mg discontinued (Prescribed for side-effects of sensitized, W//D)Zolipidem PRN (2.5mg.) Reinstated May 15, 2017 after18m+ discontinuation Between May and Aug18-Aug 30, 2017 Discontinued Aug. 30. 2017 Escitalopram 8.2mg, Sept. 6 Ecitalopram (7.25 tablet) September 28 Escitalopram (7 mg tablet) Omega 3's , October 1 Escitalopram (6.25...I think) November 1, Escitalopram (approx. 5.75mg) December 1 (5mg) Missed .75 for few days, lowered dose. W/D ramped up Dec.23; Escitalopram 4mg tab. .75ml liquid March 5. Adderall XR 5mg, Synthroid 112mcg March 23 Escitalopram 4mg tab .50ml liquid.April 23 Escotalopram 4mgtab .25ml liquid Escitalopram dropping .25 every 30 days; July 23, 2018 Escitalopram 3.50mg, Adderall XR 5mg, Synthroid 112mcg July 2021: Took last dose of Escitalopram .02mg. Do dah! Current: Synthroid/Generic 100mcg decreased November, 2018 (TSH has changed 5 times since August 30, 2018 resulting in both Hyper and hypothyroid symptoms.) November 1, 2018, increased Adderall XR to 10mg to combat brain fog after decrease in Synthroid. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 2, 2018 Author Share Posted January 2, 2018 6 hours ago, JS11 said: Hi LG, I just wanted to say hello and I'm sorry that the first day of the New Year finds you with a boatload of anxiety. That is one reason I went off the liquid, although for accuracy's sake, it is so much better than cutting up or gnawing little chunks off of pills. This summer, (before I found this site), I was doing part tablet and part prescription liquid. Almost immediately after I sucked the liquid down, it was instant anxiety. My heart was pounding and felt like it was going to pop out. Hi JS did the anxiety lessen when you went back to the pills? the pharmacy switched mfg on my pills a while back and I had a reaction to that. They traded the new ones out for the old mfg and within a few days, the anxiety lessened. I’m hoping my brain adjusts to the liquid. Anxiety hasn’t been quite this high in awhile. It’s just horrible. I could have the pills compunded but that’s an hour round trip drive and that in itself is anxiety provoking. And it’s costly as insurance doesn’t cover it. Did you find out yet if yours would be covered? Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
JS11 Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 12 hours ago, Littlegrandma said: Hi JS did the anxiety lessen when you went back to the pills? the pharmacy switched mfg on my pills a while back and I had a reaction to that. They traded the new ones out for the old mfg and within a few days, the anxiety lessened. I’m hoping my brain adjusts to the liquid. Anxiety hasn’t been quite this high in awhile. It’s just horrible. I could have the pills compunded but that’s an hour round trip drive and that in itself is anxiety provoking. And it’s costly as insurance doesn’t cover it. Did you find out yet if yours would be covered? Lg HI LG, I chucked the liquid a while back this summer when I was in major withdrawal from a medley of medicines. It didn't totally alleviate the anxiety, but when I DID take the liquid, the anxious feelings were almost immediate. I read somewhere on here that there are people who take their medications in small increments. I think LexAnger was one, but I'm not certain. It makes sense that a straight shot of the stuff goes right into your system rather than the process of having to digest a pill. I'm sure my current anxiety is a combination of life turmoil and my recent cut, but it has really hit me. I am sensitive like that with pills as well and have had similar reactions when the pharmacy got my RX from a different manufacturer. Our systems become so used to the same chemical compounds, at least mine did. Sounds like yours did as well. I have not checked into whether I am able to get my next cut compounded. While I am grateful to have insurance and not be paying cash, I assume it will probably take letters from providers to get permission. I see my doctor next week, so will see if I can find that out. I had to change pharmacies recently, from Costco where I have been forever, to another one. Costco always went above and beyond for me and I'm sure these guys will too, but miss my ole' home. Having to drive over an hour for a prescription would produce anxiety in me as well. I wonder if they could mail it to you? As long as they didn't charge a bundle, might be something to consider. Hope you are faring well and that your anxiety is giving you a reprieve. Mine has lessened, thankfully, but now I seem to have this overwhelming urge to burst into tears. Oiy vey! Not so good when you are in a professional setting. take care, JS 26 years of Anti-depressants (probably 32, lost track, alone and/in combination Vyvanse 30mg Discontinued Feb. 22, 2013 Topamax 25-75mg Feb 23, 2013--Feb 2016 0.0 mg Discontinued Lamotrigine 25-50mg Jan 15, 2016-Adverse Reaction Discontinued Feb 2, 2016 T3 25-50mcg Feb.11, 2016 Discontinued April 23, 2016 Escitalopram 20mg-omg fast taper Nov. 2015-Jan.7, 2016 Crash! Reinstated 20mg Taper Jan 14, 2016 0.0mg Sept 2016 Reinstated Feb.21, 2017 Escitalopram 5mg Dosage Adjustments Escitalopram to 2.5mg June 28-30; Increased to 3.75mg July 1-28, 2017 July 29-Aug 4 10mg, alternated between 5 and 10mg next couple days. Aug 9, 7.25mg; Aug 10-14 10mg; Aug 15-25 7.25mg, August 25-29, 10mg. Levofloxacin (January 2017 2 doses) (Adverse Reaction: Neurotoxcity; 3 daysE.R.$30k+tests) Adderall 25mgXR (start April 23, 2013) (Nov.2016 20mg) (Dec.2016 15mg) (Feb. 5, 2016 10mg) (June 15, 2017) 5mg XR Crossover July 7 to Adderall I.M 5mg Discontinued Reinstated Adderall 5mgXR July 28th Minipress 1mg began July 20-23, 2mg July 24 last dose Discontinued (Prescribed to assist with side-effects of updose of Escitalopram) WellbutrinXR 150 mg July 24, 2017 Discontinued; Hydroxyline 25-200 mg daily, began July 20, Discontnued; (Prescribed for side-effects-sensitized; W/D)Gababentin 100mg August 28, 8/29: 00mg, 8/30/17 100mg discontinued (Prescribed for side-effects of sensitized, W//D)Zolipidem PRN (2.5mg.) Reinstated May 15, 2017 after18m+ discontinuation Between May and Aug18-Aug 30, 2017 Discontinued Aug. 30. 2017 Escitalopram 8.2mg, Sept. 6 Ecitalopram (7.25 tablet) September 28 Escitalopram (7 mg tablet) Omega 3's , October 1 Escitalopram (6.25...I think) November 1, Escitalopram (approx. 5.75mg) December 1 (5mg) Missed .75 for few days, lowered dose. W/D ramped up Dec.23; Escitalopram 4mg tab. .75ml liquid March 5. Adderall XR 5mg, Synthroid 112mcg March 23 Escitalopram 4mg tab .50ml liquid.April 23 Escotalopram 4mgtab .25ml liquid Escitalopram dropping .25 every 30 days; July 23, 2018 Escitalopram 3.50mg, Adderall XR 5mg, Synthroid 112mcg July 2021: Took last dose of Escitalopram .02mg. Do dah! Current: Synthroid/Generic 100mcg decreased November, 2018 (TSH has changed 5 times since August 30, 2018 resulting in both Hyper and hypothyroid symptoms.) November 1, 2018, increased Adderall XR to 10mg to combat brain fog after decrease in Synthroid. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 4, 2018 Author Share Posted January 4, 2018 Hi JS i think much of my anxiety was just from the thought of tapering. It seemed to settle down a bit by the 3rd day. I don’t know because anxiety is high again today. It is hard to wrap your head around what is wd and what is anxiety about this whole process. You have to work everyday in a professional setting? Oh my gosh!! hats off to you. I have a hard time just taking care of my grandbabies and home. But I do have to somehow control my tears in front of my 5 yr old granddaughter. She is such a sensitive soul. Her insight at that age amazes me. But when the tears want to come, sometime there’s no stopping them. Im glad your anxiety has let up. Hopefully it will stay away. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to this process. I’m trying to go with the flow and holding onto to hope that someday soon I will wake to a clear head and calm body. It’s all quite disturbing. Hope you have peace today! Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 6, 2018 Author Share Posted January 6, 2018 It is day 7 of my taper of lexapro from 5 mg to 4.8. That’s only 4%. The symptoms I am experiencing are extreme anxiety dont know who or where I am trembling akathasia wobbly legs, difficult to walk painful burning thighs pressure in head, shaky nausea headache fatigue breathing labored pressure in left ear sore throat sore glands tinnitus pressure in eyes , blurry vision pins and needles itching depression crying fear after the first few days of my taper, the anxiety lessened and I had extreme fatigue. But anxiety has ramped up. I hoped I would feel better getting the toxins out of my system. If if I feel this bad with such a small cut, why would I not just go faster and get it over with? In 7 months, all of my symptoms remain. I not only get the psych, but the physical. The dp/ dr never lets up. It’s very disturbing. Terrifying. I have had few days of small windows, but never good. Never where alll symptoms let up. Never had a day of feeling normal. The dp/ dr always remains. Its hard to remain positive. I see no end to this hell. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
wantrelief Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Oh LG, I am so very sorry you are feeling so badly. Did your symptoms get worse with your cut? I have been holding hoping to become more stable before cutting but am not sure that is going to happen as I may be in tolerance so I am interested in your experience with tapering. I understand your urge to just quit the medication that is causing the problem but I think that will only compound your symptoms in the end. I so wish it didn't work that way and we could just quit and be done with it. I am thinking about you and hope you feel better soon. -1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD) -10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot -Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram -Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015 -8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?) - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg). Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin Citalopram taper: 2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg; 3/29/24: 1.17 mg; 4/5/24: 1.14 mg; 4/13/24: 1.11 mg; 4/20/24: 1.09 mg; 4/27/24: 1.06 mg; 5/4/24: 1.04 mg; 5/11/24: 1.01 mg Link to comment
AliG Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Hi LG. Are there any new symptoms or are they all your old symptoms, ramped up since your recent cut? Going faster is not necessarily going to "get it over with". If only it were that easy. It could definitely make things much worse ~ there is always the possibility of creating even more instability during this process. Lexapro is a very strong drug and it may take a few weeks or longer to start to come back to some sort of "withdrawal normal". Which self- care methods/ techniques are you currently using? You may want to "up" those a bit as you transition through this. Actually, they should always form the base of your healing ~ everything else, comes after that. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 6, 2018 Author Share Posted January 6, 2018 48 minutes ago, wantrelief said: Oh LG, I am so very sorry you are feeling so badly. Did your symptoms get worse with your cut? I have been holding hoping to become more stable before cutting but am not sure that is going to happen as I may be in tolerance so I am interested in your experience with tapering. I understand your urge to just quit the medication that is causing the problem but I think that will only compound your symptoms in the end. I so wish it didn't work that way and we could just quit and be done with it. I am thinking about you and hope you feel better soon. Hi WR thank you i glanced through your thread. You have been at this a long time, suffering for so long. I am so sorry. This is a nightmare. My original taper on June 2nd was 25% of my lex. I was very sick with all the symptoms for 2 wks and they abruptly stopped. I attempted the next taper from 7.5 to 7 making my own liquid. I did that for a few weeks and and got no relief. Just sicker and sicker. I upped to 8 and eventually to 10 at the advice of a dr. I thought I could start over and taper slower. It was about that time I found SA. I had akathasia, trembling, complete insomnia and ate very little. I ended up inpatient where they cut lex from 10 to 5 mg in a week and added Ativan to the mix. That was in August. I have had better days but no true windows. I decided that was just my wd norm and decided last Saturday to try to reduce, hoping to get relief. I suppose I should have held a little longer, but after 5 mo at that dose with no relief, I was convinced the lex was having a toxic effect on me and wanted to see if a tiny taper would bring that relief. Apparently not. It’s only been a week. Not sure what to do at this point. Im pretty nonfunctional. Thanks for checking in. Im having a tough time with my thoughts and words today. But I hope to talk to you soon. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
wantrelief Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Thank you, LG. I have indeed been at this a long time and am feeling pretty discouraged at this point. It is a nightmare. I can understand your thinking about being in your withdrawal normal - that is what I am wondering for myself as well - and that you would try to reduce. So your symptoms have gotten worse with your cut? If so, I suppose the options would be to wait it out at the new dose or go back to 5 mg. I am so sorry you are having such a tough time - you have been so patient and brave with everything you've been through. -1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD) -10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot -Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram -Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015 -8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?) - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg). Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin Citalopram taper: 2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg; 3/29/24: 1.17 mg; 4/5/24: 1.14 mg; 4/13/24: 1.11 mg; 4/20/24: 1.09 mg; 4/27/24: 1.06 mg; 5/4/24: 1.04 mg; 5/11/24: 1.01 mg Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 6, 2018 Author Share Posted January 6, 2018 44 minutes ago, wantrelief said: Thank you, LG. I have indeed been at this a long time and am feeling pretty discouraged at this point. It is a nightmare. I can understand your thinking about being in your withdrawal normal - that is what I am wondering for myself as well - and that you would try to reduce. So your symptoms have gotten worse with your cut? If so, I suppose the options would be to wait it out at the new dose or go back to 5 mg. I am so sorry you are having such a tough time - you have been so patient and brave with everything you've been through. I love your name. I guess relief is what we all want! It is truly a nightmare. I figure after 7 mo without a true window, this is my wd normal. That’s why I had to make the cut. I’m hoping the lower I get, the better I feel. I never felt good on lexapro. I had terrible startup side effects. Some never subsided. Dp/ dr and apathy was a constant. I felt like I was looking at the world from under water. Still do. I feel like I’m not controlling my own body or mind. Very scary. The symptoms have definitely gotten worse with the cut. I just hope and pray they lessen in a week or 2. Sad to think I’ll feel this way through the taper and beyond. It makes me long for my old normal. Anxiety and all. The old anxiety was nothing in comparison to this. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
JS11 Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 On 1/2/2018 at 2:59 AM, Littlegrandma said: Hi JS did the anxiety lessen when you went back to the pills? the pharmacy switched mfg on my pills a while back and I had a reaction to that. They traded the new ones out for the old mfg and within a few days, the anxiety lessened. I’m hoping my brain adjusts to the liquid. Anxiety hasn’t been quite this high in awhile. It’s just horrible. I could have the pills compunded but that’s an hour round trip drive and that in itself is anxiety provoking. And it’s costly as insurance doesn’t cover it. Did you find out yet if yours would be covered? Lg Sorry about the delay, LG, I totally missed your response. I never really thought about the manufacturer thing until your comments. I had to switch from Costco, my long time pharmacy, to another and pharmacy as my insurance was no longer accepted, so two of my 3 prescriptions are from different manufacturers. I did make a change in dose, but the symptoms seemed to just surge out of nowhere and I suppose I just want to have something else to blame it on other than withdrawal. An easy fix, which I know is a lot of wishful thinking on my part. You said yours anxiety lessened when you went back to the old manufacturer? I don't know if I am able to do that, but am being hit hard right now and just so want some relief. I know we all do. I did notice that the anxiety decreased when I stopped taking the liquid. However, I was reading RachelSusan's thread, and she indicated that it took her body time to adjust from the liquid to pill. She just changed from one to the other. It is a more accurate means of measurement and consistency, but it can wreak havoc as well. Apparently, there is something on the site that may explain it better. Oh my friend, I just read the above and I am so very sorry you are struggling so with all of these symptoms. I, too, feel like I am ingesting poison and so appreciate your decision to reduce from 5mg to 4.8mgs, hoping for some relief. It is so very difficult not to be discouraged. I often feel the same way. You have come so very far. I just wanted to say that I am thinking of you and hoping so for an easing of your symptoms. take care, LG. JS 26 years of Anti-depressants (probably 32, lost track, alone and/in combination Vyvanse 30mg Discontinued Feb. 22, 2013 Topamax 25-75mg Feb 23, 2013--Feb 2016 0.0 mg Discontinued Lamotrigine 25-50mg Jan 15, 2016-Adverse Reaction Discontinued Feb 2, 2016 T3 25-50mcg Feb.11, 2016 Discontinued April 23, 2016 Escitalopram 20mg-omg fast taper Nov. 2015-Jan.7, 2016 Crash! Reinstated 20mg Taper Jan 14, 2016 0.0mg Sept 2016 Reinstated Feb.21, 2017 Escitalopram 5mg Dosage Adjustments Escitalopram to 2.5mg June 28-30; Increased to 3.75mg July 1-28, 2017 July 29-Aug 4 10mg, alternated between 5 and 10mg next couple days. Aug 9, 7.25mg; Aug 10-14 10mg; Aug 15-25 7.25mg, August 25-29, 10mg. Levofloxacin (January 2017 2 doses) (Adverse Reaction: Neurotoxcity; 3 daysE.R.$30k+tests) Adderall 25mgXR (start April 23, 2013) (Nov.2016 20mg) (Dec.2016 15mg) (Feb. 5, 2016 10mg) (June 15, 2017) 5mg XR Crossover July 7 to Adderall I.M 5mg Discontinued Reinstated Adderall 5mgXR July 28th Minipress 1mg began July 20-23, 2mg July 24 last dose Discontinued (Prescribed to assist with side-effects of updose of Escitalopram) WellbutrinXR 150 mg July 24, 2017 Discontinued; Hydroxyline 25-200 mg daily, began July 20, Discontnued; (Prescribed for side-effects-sensitized; W/D)Gababentin 100mg August 28, 8/29: 00mg, 8/30/17 100mg discontinued (Prescribed for side-effects of sensitized, W//D)Zolipidem PRN (2.5mg.) Reinstated May 15, 2017 after18m+ discontinuation Between May and Aug18-Aug 30, 2017 Discontinued Aug. 30. 2017 Escitalopram 8.2mg, Sept. 6 Ecitalopram (7.25 tablet) September 28 Escitalopram (7 mg tablet) Omega 3's , October 1 Escitalopram (6.25...I think) November 1, Escitalopram (approx. 5.75mg) December 1 (5mg) Missed .75 for few days, lowered dose. W/D ramped up Dec.23; Escitalopram 4mg tab. .75ml liquid March 5. Adderall XR 5mg, Synthroid 112mcg March 23 Escitalopram 4mg tab .50ml liquid.April 23 Escotalopram 4mgtab .25ml liquid Escitalopram dropping .25 every 30 days; July 23, 2018 Escitalopram 3.50mg, Adderall XR 5mg, Synthroid 112mcg July 2021: Took last dose of Escitalopram .02mg. Do dah! Current: Synthroid/Generic 100mcg decreased November, 2018 (TSH has changed 5 times since August 30, 2018 resulting in both Hyper and hypothyroid symptoms.) November 1, 2018, increased Adderall XR to 10mg to combat brain fog after decrease in Synthroid. Link to comment
wantrelief Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 1 hour ago, Littlegrandma said: I love your name. I guess relief is what we all want! It is truly a nightmare. I figure after 7 mo without a true window, this is my wd normal. That’s why I had to make the cut. I’m hoping the lower I get, the better I feel. I never felt good on lexapro. I had terrible startup side effects. Some never subsided. Dp/ dr and apathy was a constant. I felt like I was looking at the world from under water. Still do. I feel like I’m not controlling my own body or mind. Very scary. The symptoms have definitely gotten worse with the cut. I just hope and pray they lessen in a week or 2. Sad to think I’ll feel this way through the taper and beyond. It makes me long for my old normal. Anxiety and all. The old anxiety was nothing in comparison to this. Lg I am so very sorry you have had constant dp/dr and apathy for 7 months. I have major apathy and really relate to feeling out of control of your body and mind. I hope as you do that the lower you get, the better you will feel - especially since you never felt well on Lexapro. I am rooting for you!! -1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD) -10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot -Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram -Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015 -8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?) - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg). Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin Citalopram taper: 2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg; 3/29/24: 1.17 mg; 4/5/24: 1.14 mg; 4/13/24: 1.11 mg; 4/20/24: 1.09 mg; 4/27/24: 1.06 mg; 5/4/24: 1.04 mg; 5/11/24: 1.01 mg Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 6, 2018 Author Share Posted January 6, 2018 Thank you wantrelief i appreciate it. I want the same for you. Please keep me posted. We can do this! Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 7, 2018 Author Share Posted January 7, 2018 On 1/6/2018 at 12:42 PM, JS11 said: Sorry about the delay, LG, I totally missed your response. I never really thought about the manufacturer thing until your comments. I had to switch from Costco, my long time pharmacy, to another and pharmacy as my insurance was no longer accepted, so two of my 3 prescriptions are from different manufacturers. I did make a change in dose, but the symptoms seemed to just surge out of nowhere and I suppose I just want to have something else to blame it on other than withdrawal. An easy fix, which I know is a lot of wishful thinking on my part. You said yours anxiety lessened when you went back to the old manufacturer? I don't know if I am able to do that, but am being hit hard right now and just so want some relief. I know we all do. I did notice that the anxiety decreased when I stopped taking the liquid. However, I was reading RachelSusan's thread, and she indicated that it took her body time to adjust from the liquid to pill. She just changed from one to the other. It is a more accurate means of measurement and consistency, but it can wreak havoc as well. Apparently, there is something on the site that may explain it better. Oh my friend, I just read the above and I am so very sorry you are struggling so with all of these symptoms. I, too, feel like I am ingesting poison and so appreciate your decision to reduce from 5mg to 4.8mgs, hoping for some relief. It is so very difficult not to be discouraged. I often feel the same way. You have come so very far. I just wanted to say that I am thinking of you and hoping so for an easing of your symptoms. take care, LG. JS Thanks JS having a tough day with the blahs today. I don’t think it’s depression. But I can’t motivate myself to do anything. Whine. Been doing a lot of that lately. But the anxiety is a bit better, so I think the transition from tablet to liquid is settling down. So I’m hoping if you have to switch mfg, and have side effects, it’ll be short lived. I cant wait til spring!!! I have cabin fever. Hope your Sunday is more exciting than mine. Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 8, 2018 Author Share Posted January 8, 2018 On 1/6/2018 at 10:29 AM, AliG said: Hi LG. Are there any new symptoms or are they all your old symptoms, ramped up since your recent cut? Going faster is not necessarily going to "get it over with". If only it were that easy. It could definitely make things much worse ~ there is always the possibility of creating even more instability during this process. Lexapro is a very strong drug and it may take a few weeks or longer to start to come back to some sort of "withdrawal normal". Which self- care methods/ techniques are you currently using? You may want to "up" those a bit as you transition through this. Actually, they should always form the base of your healing ~ everything else, comes after that. Hey Ali i don’t see my response to you after your post. Maybe I didn’t hit send or maybe I’m too foggy to find it. My old symptoms ramped up along with new...tinnitus and lower bowel pain. My legs are so wobbly making it difficult to walk. That’s not really new but worse than ever. A couple days into my cut, I thought I made the right decision but now I’m not so sure. I had a few relatively peaceful days where anxiety had lessened but all symptoms are as bad as they ever were. After a 5 month hold, I thought I was at my wd norm. Without any true windows, should I have held longer? Should I updose or wait it out? I have every symptom I’ve ever seen listed on this forum. I’m not sure stabilization is in the cards for me. Thanks Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Hazel Posted January 8, 2018 Share Posted January 8, 2018 Hi Little grandma, sorry to hear you are having a hard time. I am struggling as well after a recent drop. This truly is a nightmare. I think I am feeling the worst than I ever have. It’s so hard to know what to do when things get so bad. I just wanted you to know you are not alone and I am thinking of you. I hope and pray we get through this-and very soon! Zoloft 50 mg Fall 2003-October 2016 I went up to 150 mg for several months during the winter of 2016 after going through a tough time trying to stabilize. Lexapro 5 mg and then 10 mg October 2016-December 2016 Paxil December 2016 to present. Started at 10 mg went up to 20 mg for three weeks and started reducing by 5mg every 2 weeks per doctors orders. Got down to 7.5 mg and ran into trouble, found this website and updosed to 10 mg. 9mg paroxetine June 18-6.5 mg in am 2.5 mg pm. July 20 began switch to Citalopram-9 mg Paxil and 5 mg citalopram July 24-7.5mg paroxetine and 7.5mg Citalopram July 27-5mg paroxetine and 10 citalopram July 30-2.5 paroxetine and 10 of Citalopram August 2-2mg paroxetine and 10mg Citalopram, dropped paroxetine Aug. 3 August 8 increased to 15 mg citalopram Take 1mg lorazepam as needed and 3mg melatonin at night. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 8, 2018 Author Share Posted January 8, 2018 Hi hazel thank you i see you live in one of my favorite states. I don’t think there’s an inch of wisc I haven’t explored. Spend a lot of time traveling through on the back of motorcycle with my husband. Ive been struggling since last June when I decided to get off lexapro. It went all wrong and now I’ve ended up on regular dose of Ativan and toprol. Wish I’d have found this site first. After a 5 mo hold, I decided to cut lexapro from 5 to 4.8 mg. That was 9 days ago and all hell has broke loose. I just never thought I would stabilize so decided to cut. Might be a big mistake. I suggest if you stabilize, to go slow and hold for awhile. I hadn’t felt good in 7 mo so I thought maybe the lex was having a toxic effect and wanted to purge some of it. I doubt I will ever feel good again. Thanks for stopping by. Stay in touch. I hope you get relief soon. Not easy with three children. I watch my grandkids a few days a week. But they go home at 8 pm. Couldn’t do it full time around the clock. xx Lg Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
Hazel Posted January 8, 2018 Share Posted January 8, 2018 Hi Little grandma, I was also holding for a while-a little more than 4 months before I decided to make a small drop. I also didn’t feel like I was stabilizing on Paxil, so dropped by .1mg. Did well with that and continued to make tiny cuts. I did really well over the holidays and decided to try a bigger drop from 7.5 to 7.0 at the end of December. That did not go well at all, so I went back to 7.5 and am hoping to stabilize soon. I am starting to think I will never be able to get off of these meds. You say you haven’t felt good in 7 months? I can’t even imagine feeling bad for that long. Do you get any windows? I believe you will feel good again. I know I despair as well when I feels so bad, but I try to have faith that things will get better. It seems that even people who cold turkey improve eventually. Unfortunately it takes a lot more time than we would like. It is hard for me with three kids and a job, but I guess they help me to keep moving forward. I imagine your grandchildren help you to keep going as well. Take care and try to keep the faith. I really do believe we will get through this😊 Zoloft 50 mg Fall 2003-October 2016 I went up to 150 mg for several months during the winter of 2016 after going through a tough time trying to stabilize. Lexapro 5 mg and then 10 mg October 2016-December 2016 Paxil December 2016 to present. Started at 10 mg went up to 20 mg for three weeks and started reducing by 5mg every 2 weeks per doctors orders. Got down to 7.5 mg and ran into trouble, found this website and updosed to 10 mg. 9mg paroxetine June 18-6.5 mg in am 2.5 mg pm. July 20 began switch to Citalopram-9 mg Paxil and 5 mg citalopram July 24-7.5mg paroxetine and 7.5mg Citalopram July 27-5mg paroxetine and 10 citalopram July 30-2.5 paroxetine and 10 of Citalopram August 2-2mg paroxetine and 10mg Citalopram, dropped paroxetine Aug. 3 August 8 increased to 15 mg citalopram Take 1mg lorazepam as needed and 3mg melatonin at night. Link to comment
Littlegrandma Posted January 8, 2018 Author Share Posted January 8, 2018 Hi Hazel no. No windows. Just some better days where some of the symptoms were less. I have every symptom I’ve seen on this forum. Except ED. Ha did you feel better right away after you updosed back to 7.5? I did read your whole thread but have such brain fog. I’m stuck between updosing and waiting it out. I just want off this stuff so bad. I’m glad you’re avoiding the Ativan. I will still have that to taper. What part of wisc do you live in? i have relatives near Milwaukee and also Green Bay. I love the lakefront in Milwaukee. So much quieter than Chicago. But I especially love the tiny towns and the taverns!! People are so warm and friendly. And lambeau on game day. My husband is a lifelong packer fan. xx Lex 4.3mg, 3/2/18 Ativan ,5 mg, lunesta 2 mg , toprol 25 mg Oct 16-28 2018 C/O to 19 mg V from 1.5 mg Ativan, 1.3 mg lunesta jan 22 2019- 11 mg V jan 23 - pneumonia, 2 AB’s. Hold taper july 5- 10.72 V July 6- 11 mg V- ugly bad july 11- 10.72 mg V, 4.3 lex, 25 mg toprol Link to comment
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