LotusRising: Buspar, Ativan

[Greatful]

@MedRN

 

Up and down like a roller-coaster.......Overall better then last summer and most of the winter.

I can relate to your comment...about what is WD and adverse reaction........I might have the same issue with my lex.....I guess we just keep taking steps to get off the drug........

The lower I go on the lex the better I feel......but still have to go through the wd garbage....

  

[LotusRising]

@Greatful

 

Yep, I couldn't agree with you more. Yesterday, I started to have some relief from my constant head and ear pressure, only to wake up with it this morning. Very depressing. Yesterday was good - I was able to get out with my family and watch my kids go skating and enjoying themselves - made me feel happy. The sun was shining, it was really a beautiful day. Today is overcast and I'm home alone, so weekdays are always harder, especially not being able to work and of course, not as great with constant pressure.

 

I see you made the crossover to liquid - that was a super stressful time for me, but it's definitely much easier than weighing out pills, like I was before. Did it go smoothly for you?

 

I totally know what you mean about withdrawal vs adverse reactions - I feel like it makes it that much harder to know when to taper and when not to taper. I'm guessing I need to hold right now with all the head pressure I'm getting, but the flip side of that is the reactions when I take my medication. Super challenging and I find I'm always analyzing my symptoms, but still feeling like I'm getting nowhere ...

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Just looking for some advice

 

To recap, we had me dropping two doses/day starting at the beginning of February - I kind of eased into this, and dropped 1-2 doses/day until Feb 19 when I believe I started getting ear pressure. I slowed down to one dose per day from that point, until Feb 23. Then I held 24, 25, dropped one dose Feb 25 and have held Feb 27, 28. I notice I am still getting some minor ear pain on and off in between doses. But I am also reacting more again when my dose peaks - increased head pressure/ear pressure/abd tightening/chest tightening. I can't even believe I'm still reacting at this dose. It feels like it will never stop and I don't even know what to do at this point. I feel like I just wait around for my next reaction and my day to end, only to restart the whole process the next day. I feel in a really negative spot right now.

 

Should I be continuing to hold until the ear stuff resolves? My ears seem to be affected either way, so part of me thinks I should reduce a dose again today. I'm feeling so depressed, crying daily and I still can't sleep more than two hours in a row. I'm having such a hard time seeing myself through this at the moment ... 

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

I'm so sorry this is happening. I was so hoping that it would ease up since you held, but unfortunately it is not subsiding.

 

If you feel like it, I would go ahead and start the decreasing again and see if it will let up at all.

 

In the meantime, take tylenol or ibuprofen and hopefully with a couple more drops it may go away.

 

Fingers crossed for you. I know this is tough, but look how far you are now! Keep me posted.

[LotusRising]

 

@Frogie Or, anyone else that can offer advice and encouragement  

 

Hi Frogie, I hope you are well. I haven't checked in recently, but not doing so great.

 

Since my symptoms have moved into my head, I'm finding everything so hard to manage. Lots of ear pain, pressure and now I am getting loads of nausea, I think because of the pain. I have slowed my taper down considerably, but of course the paradoxical reactions have also flared, which tend to mimic any withdrawal symptoms, so I feel like I'm going from one symptom to another ☹️

 

I think I remember you suffered a lot of nausea with your Lexapro withdrawal. Just wondering what you found most effective? This is the first time I'm experiencing this. I'm currently trying some ginger tea, but any advice would be appreciated. I'll also try to do a quick search here on the forum.

 

 

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

Just checking in with you. Hope you are doing better.

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Not doing super great. Really trying to keep my mood up, but really hard at the moment. I haven't really been the same since having to slow everything down. It has spiked the paradoxical reactions, so the symptoms seems endless. My abdomen tightened for 9 hrs yesterday, and it is tightening again today, so it's quite depressing. And the ear pressure/pain has been almost unbearable at times. 

 

I know there is an end point, but it seems so very far away at the moment. I just try to keep pushing through.

 

I hope your friend is doing ok 💕

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

I am really sorry you are having those symptoms. Have you held anymore?

 

I know you can get through this, but I also know that it is very frustrating at the same time.

 

Hang in there. It will get better. You are closer and closer to the finish line.

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Yes, I’ve been holding. The longest I can go is a two day hold. I tried 3 and the reactions to the doses became a lot worse. Every other day seems too much, as I think that’s why the tightening is lasting such a long time. I will try holding for two days at a time. 
 

I have such a hopeless feeling right now. I had really thought I would be functioning a lot better by this point. 
 

Thank you for your encouragement. 

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

All you can do is go up from here. 

 

Keep your chin up, you are doing great for going through what you are.

 

Take care

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

I'm losing hope that my body will ever stop reacting to this medication. My abdomen has been tightening since 0745 this morning, I had about a 15min reprieve and then my dose peaked and I'm reacting with the very same symptom of the withdrawal. In your experience, do these paradoxical reactions ever cease, or should I expect them for the remainder of my taper?

[Frogie]

 

@MedRN

 

Unfortunately, everyone is different. I know with my Lexapro taper, my symptoms were better the lower I went.

 

Hopefully your's will do that also.

 

 

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Do you think the tightening is just the body fighting for more medication - is the taper too fast? Or is it possible the medication is just built up in my system again and I'm going to slow?

 

I'm assuming most people would go down to zero on clonazepam?

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

You want to go as low as possible. I jumped off Lexapro at 0.5 mg and that was a little to high.

 

I think it is your body fighting for more of the Clonazepam because you have had this symptom since you started tapering it.

 

I hope it let's up very soon for you.

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

Hibari jumped off at .0150 mg. 

 

We use mgai which is milligram active ingredient and mgpw which is milligram pill weight. 

 

You are using the mgai, you just list it as mg.

 

Does that help?

 

 

[LotusRising]

Thank you @Frogie

 

This is definitely one of my harder days.

 

I am thankful my psych doctor is supporting me to taper slowly, but it certainly doesn't help when she says I'm the only patient she's had that has had such a long and symptomatic taper. It definitely gets into my head a bit.

 

I will do my best to stay optimistic. Thanks again 😊

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Yes, that does help.

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

I'm sure she has a lot of other patients that have stronger symptoms than you, she just isn't admitting it to you.

 

Not all her patients can walk away from something like this without symptoms.  Usually they taper their patients off so quickly that they end up much worse. That is just my opinion though.

 

You have the whole sites support. 

[Frogie]

1 minute ago, MedRN said:

@Frogie

 

Yes, that does help.

Glad I could help.

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

I just realized there is a time change coming up on Sunday. I know you typically recommend moving times forward - I would prefer to keep things the same - 0400/1000/1600/2200. I can’t imagine staying up until 2300 to take my night time dose. I already wake at 0100/0300 and 0400, so going to bed at 2200 and setting an alarm for 2300 doesn’t sound great. 
 

Any ideas?

[Frogie]

 

@MedRN

 

When I did my taper, I just followed whatever time I was on. So when the time changed, I just went with it. It took a couple of days to straighten out but then I was ok.

 

I wouldn't want you to go to bed and an hour later have to get up and take it. 

 

You could try just going with the time change and see how it goes. We can always adjust it if needed.

 

 

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Yeah, maybe I will just try that then. 
 

How ever did you make it with nausea every day of your taper? I have spent the last two days mostly in bed with this abdominal tightening and already looking the same today. It is relentless and I have no will to get up and motivated. I feel in a real rut right now. The tears have hardly stopped 😢

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

Try it and if the time change doesn't work, we can adjust if necessary.

 

About my nausea, there were many days that I laid in bed and cried. My poor "hubby" (we aren't married legally) would work 12-14 hours, come home and cook, do laundry, dishes and clean the house as much as he could. Then some days, like you, I felt good enough to take a shower and at least sit in my chair in the living room.

 

I hate that you are feeling like this. Just think that you are one day closer to the finish line.

 

Take care.

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

Checking in on you? Hopefully a little better.

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

After 3 days, I finally having some relief from the constant abdominal tightening. At the end of today, it will be 3 days holding. Longest hold I’ve done in a while. I used to get an increase in medication reactions on this day, so I’m really hoping that with the lower dose, it won’t happen🤞🏻
 

I’m getting some ear pressure again though. Would this just be my withdrawal normal? I find it so difficult to tell the difference between stability and withdrawal normal. I haven’t had a single day during this taper with an absence of symptoms. I know

everyone is different, but is that usual? 

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

I'm glad that you are feeling a little bit better.

 

This link describes WD normal.

 

WDnormal

 

I would think that the ear pressure is just another symptom that decided to pop up unfortunately. I hope it goes away for you also.

[LotusRising]

Hi @Frogie

 

I just did a 4 day hold to help alleviate some of the withdrawal symptoms I was getting. But today I dropped a dose and had a really extreme reaction when my dose peaked. I had pain in my ears that I’ve never felt before - it was a stabbing/burning type of pain at 10/10 for a good hour, with nausea as well. Do you think this is my nervous system reacting to such a long hold? I’ve never held this length of time before. Or, any ideas? Perhaps if the other mods have any ideas as well? It makes me very fearful for my next dose …

[Frogie]

Hi @MedRN

 

I'd bet it was your long 4 day hold and your body said nope, that's not happening again.

 

It did let up, along with the nausea? Nausea is the pits. I had it for 4 years through my whole Lexapro taper. I did find some over the counter stomach aid called Nauzene that helped. It didn't take it away, but helped a lot. You could try that. I had a moderator on here tell me it was ok to try.

 

Maybe try some warm mineral oil in your ear or a heating pad? That might help.

 

I think, if I were you, I wouldn't hold many more doses. Your body obviously doesn't like it. But you are so close. Not much longer and you will be free. Look how far you've come!

 

 

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

It hasn’t let up yet. The extreme pain has passed, but still sitting at a 4-5/10. I’ll see if the warm mineral oil helps. I’m already doing the heating pad. Tried ibuprofen, but I’m guessing it must be nerve pain?

 

Should I try every other day? I keep reading how everything needs to slow right down at the end. I’m assuming that’s the same with benzos? I’m actually kinda scared 😢 I’ve had two kids and that pain was a breeze compared to what I just felt …

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

The warm mineral oil might help a little, but I'm sure it is nerve pain. Your body just likes to move around and tell you it's still ticking.

 

I never slowed down at the end and did "ok", not super, super by any means, but I healed in a few months from the Lexapro taper that was a lot like you are going through.

 

 

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Ok, I’ll try every other day and see how I do. I was doing ok with holding two days as well, so can always slow down to that too. 
 

Were you symptomatic right until the end of your lexapro taper?

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

Do what you are comfortable with, every other day, every 2 days.

 

Yes, my symptoms were for a couple of months when I jumped off. But looking back, I jumped off too soon at 0.5 mg. It took a couple of months before I felt almost human.

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Yeah maybe every 2 days might be better.

 

I'm also getting a lot of interdose withdrawal. I think I'm noticing it a lot more because it's affecting my ears. It was definitely happening when it was mostly in my abdomen, but as it wasn't painful, it was much more tolerable. Any ideas about this? I feel like this is a tough one, as I'm already taking it 4 times a day. I feel like I must be metabolizing it quite quickly. The dose I seem the least affected by is my early morning dose (0400).

[Greatful]

@MedRN

My heart goes out to you♥️

I'm no expert but I can say the ear pressure has to be some sort of WD.....I have it, sometimes it is so bad I feel like I want to rip my ears off.....I don't know if mine is from ssri, or  benzo, wd.

For all I know it could come with any drug WD.

 

You are going to make it through this.  One day it will be a distant memory.♥️

 

[Frogie]

@MedRN

 

I'm sure that it is all related to wd. The lower you get, sometimes the worse symptoms just show up because your body is just fighting you for more and you won't give in.

 

I would try every two days and see if that helps. Are you across the board on your doses, or are some of them smaller than others? If the 0400 bothers you the most, you could work on eliminating it first and see how you do. 

 

You are so close, you'll be done in no time. Hang in there😊

[LotusRising]

@Frogie

 

Makes me terrified. I know I need to not dwell, but the pain was so severe I have a hard time putting it out of my mind and keep worrying it will happen with my next drop.

 

When you say every two days, do you mean take a dose, skip two days, then take another dose? Or take a dose, skip a day, and take the next?

 

My current doses are 0.023mg/0.022mg/0.022mg/0.022mg. I thought I was doing okay with that 0400 dose, but last night not so much. It seems to change all the time. I'm also worried that if I take out one dose, it might make the interdose withdrawal worse? I'm hoping this all gets better over time.

 

I know I'm getting close, but it is still so far at the same time ... I feel like I've been in such a negative head space since all the ear pressure started. I'm finding the head symptoms harder to deal with than some of the others, though my husband assures me that it was way worse at the beginning.