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Happy2Heal

Happy2Heal my Victory statement

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Happy2Heal

Mod note:  link to: Happy2Heal: Hope I'm doing this right (Introduction and update topic)

 

I was just an 18yr old,  a very confused, naive young woman, er no- more of a child, really-

when I was given (by force) my first psych drug, stelazine, a major tranquilizer. 

 

that was the beginning of a long series- spanning almost 40 yrs!- of psych drugs and hospitalizations.

All along the way, I was plastered with one diagnosis after another, or several heaped on at once.

 

My physical health went downhill and I ended up a virtual shut-in, living my life all in my head, friendless, socially isolated to the extreme, my only contact with drs and therapists, leaving my house to go food shopping maybe twice a month.

This wasn't living, and I knew it. But I didn't know how to change things. I didn't know what was wrong. 

 

I spent over two thirds of my life believing I was mentally ill and *needed* to be on those drugs.

 

but at some point, it occurred to me that the drugs might actually be the problem, or at least, part of the problem.


I knew I had to get off them. and I did. The process and the pain of that is reported on my thread, I don't care to go back over it, at least not now.

I learned a lot along the way, but for now, I don't want to think about where I've been, I only want to think about where I am now, and the life I have before me.

 

 

Here I am, now, one year off all drugs, of all kinds. I rarely even take a ibuprofen for a headache.

 

I want to write my success story, but I'm not 100% ready yet

 

However I do have to say that what I feel most of all, is a great deal of pride in having survived.

I suffered all forms of abuse as a child, emotional, sexual, physical, verbal, went on to be a survivor of rape, of domestic abuse. I was abused within the mental health system.  I've spent virtually all of my adult life in poverty, raising my daughter as a single mom on disability due to "mental illness".

 

But today, I feel as if I've done more than just survive; I am thriving. I have friends. I have a very active social life. I volunteer and I feel like the work I do is making a difference, having an impact.

 

while technically I am still 'poor' by income, I don't go without anything I need, with the possible exception of good dental care :P  

I have a good life. 

 

 

 

Is my withdrawal journey over? I'm not sure.While I took my last dose of lexapro over a year ago, I feel like I am still having some symptoms that must be related to the nearly 4 DECADES on psych meds. BUT you need to know, these symptoms are extremely mild.  and after that long on so many different drugs, it stands to reason that there will be minor little tweaks that my brain will need to make, for some time to come.

 

I'd like to say that all that has faded into the background of my life, but to be honest:

I am more vigilant about them now, than at any time during active withdrawal- because I don't want to fall into a trap of thinking that any problems I may have mean that all those doctors were right, I'm permanently disabled by a mental illness and there's no hope for me. 

I am pretty sure that the only thing I suffer from is PTSD, and I don't see that as a mental illness so much as a natural reaction to extremely stressful, traumatic life events.

 

so Today I feel Victorious. I've overcome a lot and need to soak in that feeling of doing a good job

 

I don't often give myself credit for my achievements or feel like it's ok to feel good about them

but today,  I give myself permission to bask in this feeling.

 

it feels like the right and honest thing to do. 

 

I guess I just have to be different, I don't want to call this a success story because that sounds to me like the end, when in fact it is not. It's not really a beginning, either, because the beginning of my new life dates back to when I first realized that the drugs were the problem.

 

to me, this just feels like a victory over adversity- something to celebrate! so please, celebrate with me, and know that you are going to heal as well, those of you still going thru WD/recovery.

 

it's worth it, believe me

so very worth it!

:)

 

Edited by manymoretodays
reduced font size, link to introduction added

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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FarmGirlWorks
1 hour ago, Happy2Heal said:

I am pretty sure that the only thing I suffer from is PTSD, and I don't see that as a mental illness so much as a natural reaction to extremely stressful, traumatic life events.

 

so Today I feel Victorious. I've overcome a lot and need to soak in that feeling of doing a good job

Love, love, love this! So happy for you, @Happy2Heal!


  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017, quit coffee October 2017, quit cannabis 😩 July 2018
  • Magnesium powder, fish oil, estradiol, kombucha, gluten/dairy/histamine-lite
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini practice

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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wantrelief

You have overcome so much in your life, H2H, your story is really inspirational.  What a wonderful story of victory; I am so happy for you!!


-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper; withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin
-Tried several times to slowly taper Zoloft by 10%, then 5% every 4-6 weeks; could never get below approx. 40 mg - spring 2012 experienced major WD symptoms due to stress; tried to updose but no relief, back on Klonopin 1 mg.
-Switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to Citalopram. Finished Zoloft 1/13; Citalopram 35 mg and 1 mg Klonopin.
-8/13: 27 mg Citalopram; 1 mg Klonopin

-11/14: 12.6 Citalopram - began to have bad withdrawal symptoms; out of desperation increased to 1.25 mg Klonopin at the beginning of December.  12/13/14 16 mg Citalopram - going to stay here to try to stabilize; stabilized on 16 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

-7/15 - 3/16: reduced to 15 mg; ~ 2 months later w/d hit hard (probably r/t stress); 6/16 updosed to 20 mg Citalopram and trying to stabilize. Updosed to 1.5 Klonopin as well. Stabilized on 20 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

8/17-9/17: feeling withdrawal symptoms at 20 mg Citalopram (due to stress) - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium glycinate; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg

2020: 1/14/20: 10.89 mg (1.27% drop); 1/22/20: 10.75 mg (1.29% drop); 2/28/20 toe surgery; 4/26/20: 10.62 mg (1.21% drop); 5/3/20: 10.5 mg (1.22% drop); 5/10/20: 10.4 mg (1.24% drop); 5/17/20: 10.2 mg (1.25% drop); 6/7/20: 10.10 mg (1.27% drop); 6/14/20: 9.98 mg (1.19% drop); 6/21/20: 9.85 mg (1.30% drop); 6/28/20: 9.7 mg (1.22% drop); 7/12/20: 9.6 mg (1.23% drop); 7/19/20: 9.5 mg (1.25% drop); 7/26/20: 9.4 mg (1.26% drop); 8/2/20: 9.3 mg (1.28% drop); 8/17/20: 9.14 mg (1.19% drop); 8/31/20: 9.0 mg (1.31% drop); 9/6/20: 8.9 mg (1.22% drop); 9/27/20: 8.8 mg (1.23% drop); 10/4/20: 8.7 mg (1.25% drop); 10/11/20: 8.6 mg (1.27% drop); 10/18/20: 8.5 mg (1.28% drop)

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Madeleine

Congratulations!  You are an inspiration.  Thank you for sharing. 


Dec 1, 2016. 10 mg zyprexa for 1.5 month. Started taper mid-Jan. 2017. Cut 1.25 mg every 2 weeks; smaller cuts 2.5 mg down. Stopped at .6 mg. May 7, 2017: zyprexa free. 
Zoloft: Dec1, 2016, 200 mg. Started taper: Jun12, 2017: 197.5 mg; Jun19,:195 mg; July 2:185mg; July 9,:180 mg; July16,: 175; July 23: 170; July 30: 165; Aug6: 160; Aug13: 155; Aug. 20: 150; Aug.27: 146 mg; Sept3: 145 mg; Sept10:143 mg; Sept17:140 mg....Nov5: 122 mg...Dec3:112.5 mg; Jan14, 2018: 95 mg...Jan28: 90 mg; Feb21:80 mg; Mar11: 75 mg; May2:70 mg; May15: 68 mg; May28: 65 mg; Jun9: 62 mg;Jun25: 60 mg:July22: 55 mg; Aug25: 45 mg. Aug28: 50 mg...Oct 28: 38 mg; Dec.4: 30 mg; Jan8,2019: 25mg; Feb6: 23.5 mg; Apr1:17.5mg; May1:1 mg; May 5: 18;  May 18:15mg; June 16:12.5mg; Sept 10:11 mg; Sept.16:10 mg; Oct. 1: 9mg; Nov. 27: 8mg; Dec.5: 7mg; Jan.1,2020, 6 mg; Feb1: 5 mg; May 1: 2.5 mg; Jn 1: 2 mg; Jy 1: 1.5 mg
Spreadsheet: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pw4tjImAJ92OIVyRvZoZYjqxiKMk7wvp-ljiIi1olRo/edit#gid=0

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Liamb123456

Congrats did you taper or cold turkey meds 

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nick1990

Beautiful . ❤️


Started Citalopram in 2005 (aged 15) for apparent "OCD" - 60mg 

July 2015 attempted 2 x 10% + cuts 4 weeks apart. WD symptoms intense at times. Need to slow down.

 

November 2016 - Resumed taper. 1.25 - 1.5% decrease weekly approx.

44.5mg November 2016. Jan 2017 42.5 mg. March 2017 40 mg. June 2017 37mg. September 2018 22mg. Nov 2018 Holding at 22mg to stabilise from moderate wave. January 2020 - Holding, mostly feeling fine, but still having some waves at times. 

 

February 2020 - Resumed taper , 1.5% reduction weekly/every two weeks. 

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Happy2Heal
13 hours ago, FarmGirlWorks said:

Love, love, love this! So happy for you, @Happy2Heal!

 

thanks

 

I'm pretty darn happy.

and pleased with myself too. It was a lot of hard work 

 

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
12 hours ago, wantrelief said:

You have overcome so much in your life, H2H, your story is really inspirational.  What a wonderful story of victory; I am so happy for you!!

 

 

thanks wantrelief

 

 


I tend to compare myself to others who have done more, gone further with their life, forgetting that they didn't have the same challenges that I did

 

but comparisons are generally a bad idea anyway.

 

I should just be looking at how much progress I personally have made, and when I do that, I see that I have, indeed, come a long long way

:)

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
11 hours ago, Madeleine said:

Congratulations!  You are an inspiration.  Thank you for sharing. 

 

thanks so much Madeleine

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
11 hours ago, Liamb123456 said:

Congrats did you taper or cold turkey meds 

 

 

a little bit of both.  For most meds, it was cold turkey

 

the last drug I got off of, the lexapro, I tried cold turkey a couple of times and failed miserably

 

finally found this awesome forum and learned about tapering

 

I still didn't do a proper taper and I suffered greatly for that BUT I made it thru it all, and I'm finally off

 

and doing far better than I ever could have hoped!


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
8 hours ago, nick1990 said:

Beautiful . ❤️

 

 

thanks Nick


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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wantrelief
9 minutes ago, Happy2Heal said:

I should just be looking at how much progress I personally have made, and when I do that, I see that I have, indeed, come a long long way

 

I think this is something we should all strive to do.....thank you for the reminder! 


-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper; withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin
-Tried several times to slowly taper Zoloft by 10%, then 5% every 4-6 weeks; could never get below approx. 40 mg - spring 2012 experienced major WD symptoms due to stress; tried to updose but no relief, back on Klonopin 1 mg.
-Switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to Citalopram. Finished Zoloft 1/13; Citalopram 35 mg and 1 mg Klonopin.
-8/13: 27 mg Citalopram; 1 mg Klonopin

-11/14: 12.6 Citalopram - began to have bad withdrawal symptoms; out of desperation increased to 1.25 mg Klonopin at the beginning of December.  12/13/14 16 mg Citalopram - going to stay here to try to stabilize; stabilized on 16 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

-7/15 - 3/16: reduced to 15 mg; ~ 2 months later w/d hit hard (probably r/t stress); 6/16 updosed to 20 mg Citalopram and trying to stabilize. Updosed to 1.5 Klonopin as well. Stabilized on 20 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

8/17-9/17: feeling withdrawal symptoms at 20 mg Citalopram (due to stress) - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium glycinate; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg

2020: 1/14/20: 10.89 mg (1.27% drop); 1/22/20: 10.75 mg (1.29% drop); 2/28/20 toe surgery; 4/26/20: 10.62 mg (1.21% drop); 5/3/20: 10.5 mg (1.22% drop); 5/10/20: 10.4 mg (1.24% drop); 5/17/20: 10.2 mg (1.25% drop); 6/7/20: 10.10 mg (1.27% drop); 6/14/20: 9.98 mg (1.19% drop); 6/21/20: 9.85 mg (1.30% drop); 6/28/20: 9.7 mg (1.22% drop); 7/12/20: 9.6 mg (1.23% drop); 7/19/20: 9.5 mg (1.25% drop); 7/26/20: 9.4 mg (1.26% drop); 8/2/20: 9.3 mg (1.28% drop); 8/17/20: 9.14 mg (1.19% drop); 8/31/20: 9.0 mg (1.31% drop); 9/6/20: 8.9 mg (1.22% drop); 9/27/20: 8.8 mg (1.23% drop); 10/4/20: 8.7 mg (1.25% drop); 10/11/20: 8.6 mg (1.27% drop); 10/18/20: 8.5 mg (1.28% drop)

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Happy2Heal

Below is a link to my original thread and what will be my last post there.

 

in spite of the subtitle to my thread, this IS a success story,

Sorry if writing that confused any  one

 

I am, I believe, at least 99% healed from all the psych meds.


I did the math- I was on various meds for a total of 43 yrs almost non stop (I didn't take any drugs when I was pregnant)

 

so, I'm 62 yrs old now, that's only 19 yrs of my life UNmedicated.

 

THIS is why I feel victorious.  I've reclaimed my life and I'm working hard to make my life the way I want it to be

 

THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU WHO HELPED ME TO GET TO THIS PLACE!

 

 while I did a lot of work on my own, I  had a lot of support along the way that was truly life saving

 

this is a wonderful forum of caring and compassionate people

I am so very grateful for it and for all of you

❤️

 

 

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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direstraits

I cried when I read what you  survived..you are a true inspiration and the definition of a success!

I  wish you all the best life has to offer as you go forward.

congratulations!

 

much love,ds

xxx


went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct  back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.

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GirlfromD

Happy2Heal, congratulations! I am so happy for you 💚 You are such an inspiration to others, and i wish you all the best in the furture! When did you first start noticing that you were functioning a lot better or more normal, were there any signs? You deserve all the best.


2010 - 2015: 50mg Sertraline, 30mg Mirtazapine.

2015 - 2016: Last dose Mirtazapine 28.11.2015 and Sertraline 04.01.2016. (6 months taper)

2016/June: 6 months off. Feeling better but a lot of symptoms, name one and i have it.

2016/Dec: 12 months off. Hit a very bad wave, can't function at this moment, isolate and many intense symptoms. Very intense heart palpitations and very intense anxiety.

2017/June: 18 months off. Things are better, experiencing a lot of flashbacks, walking everyday.

2017/Nov: Things have finally started to improve and i'm now much better than a year ago, starting to feel a lot of improvements, but still symptoms that come in waves and windows.  

2018/June: Feeling better. Starting to do some normal things again, but still some improvements needed. All symptoms still there, just less intense.

2018/Oct: Almost 3 years off. Symptoms are milder and more manageable, but lots of anger issues at the moment. Still some depersonalization etc. Heart palpitations almost gone. There's hope.

 

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Happy2Heal
16 hours ago, direstraits said:

I cried when I read what you  survived..you are a true inspiration and the definition of a success!

I  wish you all the best life has to offer as you go forward.

congratulations!

 

much love,ds

xxx

ooh nooo, I didn't want to make anyone cry! 

most of the really bad stuff is a long time ago, except for the acute withdrawal which of course was just 2 yrs ago

 

I'm so happy to be doing so well. I feel sometimes like I won the lottery

 

thanks ds, I hope that your journey goes as well or better

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
16 hours ago, GirlfromD said:

Happy2Heal, congratulations! I am so happy for you 💚 You are such an inspiration to others, and i wish you all the best in the furture! When did you first start noticing that you were functioning a lot better or more normal, were there any signs? You deserve all the best.

 

 

hi GirlfromD,

thank you so much!

 

hmm when did I first notice that I was functioning better- well, it really was a gradual process.

All of my symptoms improved slowly over time, I don't recall any that just suddenly went away.

 

the thing that bothered me the most, the trouble sleeping, that took the longest to get better and on an "off" day can still be  an issue, but NOTHING like in the past or during acute wd

 

I'd say that about I was over the worst of the symptoms about a year after re instating my lexapro.

the following year, I felt like I was totally healed but learned, as time went by, that there was more healing happening, because things would improve, when I didn't even notice they'd been a problem!
 

it was a nice surprise

 

so I hesitate to say that I'm totally healed, because I don't know- maybe I still have minor symptoms I wont' realize I had, til they are gone.


If you read thru my thread, esp for the past year, you'll see, that happened a lot.

 

how are you doing, GirlfromD?


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Glosmom

Bravo, Happy2Heal!  You are truly an inpsiration.  May your life continue to be full of ........Happiness. :)


2016 - Oct -Daughter started Risperdal (for steroid induced psychosis that never went away after stopping prednisone)

Nov - dose increases stopped at 1.5mg in Dec

2017 - Jan- weaned from 1.5 to 1.0 in 2 weeks then 1.0 to .5 in two weeks and then off. Feb. 3 weeks of increased psychosis, pacing, insomnia, other awful symptoms so late Feb  - Back on 1.5 mg Risperdal. May  - decrease to 1.25mg, two weeks later 1.0mg - symptoms started again. June - held steady at 1.25mg for 6 weeks and switched to liquid (3 ml syringe). July - started 10% taper every 3 weeks, October -  .8 mg, December - .7 mg .

2018 -Jan- 0.65 mg,  Feb- 0.59,  Mar-0.50, late April - .40mg, July- .36 mg, Aug - switched from 3 mL syringe to 1 mL syringe for more accuracy (her dad and i were not sure we were giving her the same dose when in between the 'dashes' on the 3 mL syringe.) Aug -.30 mg (3mL syr)/.44 mg (1 mL syr) difference due to med in the tip of both syringes). Sept- .28 mg (3mL syr)/.42 mg (1 mL syr). Oct - .16 mg (3 mL syr)/.30 mg (1 mL syr). Nov.- .06mg (3mL syr)/.20 mg (1mLsyr). Dec. - tip only/unmeasurable (3mL syr)/.10 mg (1mLsyr)

2019- Jan -.06 mg (1 mL syr), Feb- .025 mg (1 mL syr), Feb 27, 2019 - jumped to zero!!

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Happy2Heal
55 minutes ago, Glosmom said:

Bravo, Happy2Heal!  You are truly an inpsiration.  May your life continue to be full of ........Happiness. :)

 

thanks so much Glosmom

 

while it feels good to be called  an Inspiration, I'm not really sure it fits, and I'm also not sure what that means, to be honest

 

I've done nothing extraordinary.

I've done what I believe most people do when they face adversity- I've b*tched and moaned about it a lot, hahaha

 

and then gone ahead with the business of dealing with it

 

I know lots of people who have faced much more trying circumstances 

and lots of people who have done so without all the complaining that I do, and who have done a much better job of overcoming the trials that they faced

 

but yes, it does feel good to hear the compliment, even if I"m not what it means exactly nor if it truly applies to me

 

I can say that what I feel that I've achieved is staying the course, not letting the hard spots keep me stuck, and while I complain plenty, I continued to do the work that would help me to get thru these last couple of years-

work that I should have done years ago, to better my life, to get a handle on distressing feelings, to learn how to out in the world and socialize with people, to learn how to take responsibility for my own feelings, and for getting what I wanted out of life.


Looking back, it seems like I just kind of expected that complaining about how bad things were to others would some how magically "solve" things for me or make things better.

 

they didn't.

and repeating the same ol tired complaints left me stuck in a place where it seemed that everything was bad and would never, or could never, get any better.

 

all of that was clearly BS

 

all I needed to do was focus on what I wanted to change, and set about figuring out how to do it!

all I needed to do was to look for what was going well, and continue in that positive direction

 

all I needed to do, and still need to continue to do, is to look for what is right, and strengthen that.

 

and when a problem comes along, to see it as an opportunity to learn something new, or to put learned skills to use, to practice coping mechanisms I learned during this journey of recovery from being on mind altering drugs

 

I think these are probably ordinary things that we tend to overlook because they seem so simple and obvious (at least, they do to me now, LOL)

 

I am very lucky that my body has healed as quickly and as well as it has. I knew it would. OK I was pretty sure it would. I have faith in the body's and the mind's ability to heal.


I love science, esp biology and read a lot about neurology, sociology, and tons of stuff on nutrition - and over and over again, the same theme appears:

the human body is remarkable in it's ability to heal

 

For instance, you can eat poorly for most of your life, but still turn that around by eating better in your later years (I'm so relieved to know that LOL)

We know from people who  have suffered brain injuries or had strokes, that the brain can often heal (but not always or fully, depending on the degree of injury etc)

 

so why should this be any different?

everyone has a different body so not everyone's path will be the same but there's no reason to think negatively and think you won't heal, I believe the vast majority of us DO heal

 

 

I pray for everyone on this forum for healing.

I don't know that there's anything in my story to aspire to, but I do want to pass on encouragement and hope, that you will get there, no matter how long and difficult the road may be for you.

 

and I pray that your healing is as swift as it can possibly be!

 

 

 

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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manymoretodays

Oh Happy2Heal,

Hugs and happy to celebrate your victory with you!

You did it!  Wrote your success story.

Thank you very much.

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt


Started with psycho meds circa 1988 I think 27 or 28 total.

AD's, antpsychotics, antiseizure mood stabilizers. Lithium, lamictal ,benzos, and stimulants. Some med. for narcolepsy once(Provigil,) Gabapentin........probably more.  Ask me?......I probably was on it.  Haphazard W/D's by Dr. recommend or uneducated self.

10/2014- off Lexapro--had been on highest dose 10 mg. then 5 mg. for a couple of years, went from 5 mg. to 3 mg. liquid and then CT in hospital(voluntary).  I got out of the hospital on a combination of low dose adderal salts x1/day and trileptal 150mg. x2/day.

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!

 

3/21/2016---I did some unwise updosing of trileptal/oxcarbazepine with some stressful stuff......doubled the above dose x2 during this last wave but began liquifying again and on approximately 68mg. starting today.  11/12//2016 24 mg. oxcarbazepine  12/9/2016 off oxcarbazepine/trileptal!!!! :) optimistic  2016 December 9- completely off all medications!!!!!

Omega3's,EPA +DHA= 1800 mg/day. Magnesium complex, orally, diluted in a liter of H2O(that I can shake up.....it usually dissolves more completely as the water gets down to room temperature) and/or Epsom salt baths prn.   Vit. C, D3, and E.  B12, melatonin tapered to 1mg., and bioidentical hormones sublingually.  Trace mineral drops.  L-lysine.  L-methylfolate=400 mcg plus daily spinach. Totally ready for a good long window to hit soon and getting better strings of full days and partial days along the way.  Definite improvement overall since I first arrived on the SA survivor ship.  Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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myndfull

Congratulations, Happy.

You've reached a kind of pinnacle and I hope there are more of them to come in your life. High spots; good times; bright and hopeful moments. Where anything and everything is possible. Where the future opens up. The negative dries up. The air clears. Where positive puts negative in its place.

Do you realize that there are only a handful of human beings on this planet who have been through what you have been through and who are now able to tell their tale? You're a rare find. I hope you can relish it, use it--that "status"--to continue to build your strength.


 

I had tried and failed to stop Paxil several times (though never using a long, slow taper) and thought Celexa might be easier, so I shifted to Celexa in 2012. In August of 2014 I began a serious tapered withdrawal from Celexa (20 mg.), making monthly drops, mostly 10% of the last dose, sometimes more, sometimes less.  In July of 2016 I took an early retirement at 59 in large part because of my intense withdrawal  symptoms.

 

Three years and eight months after beginning my taper, I stopped taking Celexa on 5/12/18.

 

I am currently in recovery and I am very slowly getting better. I still have waves and some are quite bad. But overall the trend is toward healing.

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PH1

Wow!   What an amazing story.  Thank you for sharing it.   You are strong and brave.   Your story gives me and countless others great hope for complete healing.  God bless you!


2010:  Escitalopram (Lexapro) 10 mg.   Mirtazapine (Remeron) 15 mg. 

2011:    Tapered Mirtazapine: 5 month successful taper.  Then tapered Lexapro:  4 month successful taper

May 2011 to August 2017:   No medications, full recovery

September 6, 2017:  started Mirtazapine (Remeron) 15 mg  - due to severe sudden insomnia (I believe caused by statin use)

November 16, 2017:   started Escitalopram (Lexapro) 10 mg

January 1, 2018:  Started taper of 15 mg Mirtazapine (Remeron)  -- went too fast the first few months, now micro-tapering

June 16, 2018:  Started taper of 10 mg Escitalopram (Lexapro) --  alternating micro-tapering with Mirtazapine

On 1/1/2019:  3.00 Mirtazapine,  5.37 Escitalopram;     On 7/1/2019:  1.90 Mirtazapine,  3.96  Escitalopram;   On 1/1/2020:  1.30 Mirtazapine,  3.35 Escitalopram;  On 7/1/2020:  0.40 Mirtazapine,  3.00  Escitalopram

Current (mgai):   0.09 mg  Mirtazapine;   2.69 mg  Escitalopram

Supplements:  Fish Oil, Curcumin, bio active B vitamins, zinc, magnesium glycinate, Vitamin D, Vitamin C

 

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."  Matthew 6:34

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Happy2Heal
1 hour ago, manymoretodays said:

Oh Happy2Heal,

Hugs and happy to celebrate your victory with you!

You did it!  Wrote your success story.

Thank you very much.

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

thanks!!  :)

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
1 hour ago, myndfull said:

Congratulations, Happy.

You've reached a kind of pinnacle and I hope there are more of them to come in your life. High spots; good times; bright and hopeful moments. Where anything and everything is possible. Where the future opens up. The negative dries up. The air clears. Where positive puts negative in its place.

Do you realize that there are only a handful of human beings on this planet who have been through what you have been through and who are now able to tell their tale? You're a rare find. I hope you can relish it, use it--that "status"--to continue to build your strength.

 

aww thanks so much myndfull

 

I surely hope there's more than a handful like me- lol

it helps to remember that I didn't go thru all the bad stuff all at once or all in a single day, it was spread out over a long period of time, so  I feel that somewhat dilutes it

(in a different way, it almost seems worse because there were such long periods of bad stuff, but STILL like everyone else, I only had to get thru one day at a time)

 

and that is actually one of the most important things to remember going thru WD/recovery, you only need to get thru the day, or the next hour, or the next few minutes

 

that's it. and you can do it!! 

 

 

but I do very much relish making it this far!! 

when I have a bad day, I will have to remember that it's just that, a bad day- the sun will shine once again

 

(we've had a long stretch of rainy days where I am so seeing the sun is a big treat lately LOL)

 

how are you going, myndfull?

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
40 minutes ago, PH1 said:

Wow!   What an amazing story.  Thank you for sharing it.   You are strong and brave.   Your story gives me and countless others great hope for complete healing.  God bless you!

thanks PH1

 

I love the quote in your signature!!

it's perfect and great advice for anyone going thru this!

 

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."  Matthew 6:34


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Gridley

H2H, you are an inspiration.  Thank you for writing this uplifting post.  It sings out in your words: you are truly "happy to heal!"


Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Began taper using Brassmonkey slide Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Current from Oct. 21, 2020 at 0.025mg

Taper is 99.875% complete.

 

Lorazepam 1 mg 1986-1991 CT, resumed a few months later. CT 2000.  1 mg 2011-2016.  Sept, 2016 increased to 0.5 X 3 in split dose. Sept. 2019 increased to 0.625 X 3 after crossover to new brand

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan. 2016 began every 3-weeks 10% taper, down to 15mg.  Aug 2016, discovered SA, updosed to 25mg and holding.  Taper is 66% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega, vitamins E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, melatonin .3mg


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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Leo1983

So so so pleased for you.

 

This is hell you deserve heaven. Well done as it must have been torture. 

 

X


May 2016 - Aug 2016 - Prozac 20mg

 

March 2017 - June 2017 - Sertraline 100mg. Horrific withdrawal 5 m onths.

 

July 2017 - Aug 2017 - Mirtazapine 15mg. Horrific.

 

August 2017 - December 2017 Fluoxetine 10mg for 2 weeks ghen Escitalopram 20mg for 12 weeks. Never felt normal since this. Or baseline.

 

March 2018 - June 2018 - Escitalopram 5mg for 12 weeks. Stopped and here i am full of symptoms i never had.

 

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Altostrata

Wow, H2H, who would have thought you'd write this when you joined SA almost 3 years ago! So happy you can write this. 🔆


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Happy2Heal
1 hour ago, Gridley said:

H2H, you are an inspiration.  Thank you for writing this uplifting post.  It sings out in your words: you are truly "happy to heal!"

 

oh yes so very happy to heal

 

not thrilled that I had to go thru all that but there was a silver lining, it got me to where I am now

 

and it led me to "meet" so many brave and strong and kind compassionate people here on this forum

 

I"ll be forever grateful for that, and for this forum and for Alto for all the hard work she's done and continues to do

 

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
49 minutes ago, Leo1983 said:

So so so pleased for you.

 

This is hell you deserve heaven. Well done as it must have been torture. 

 

X

thank you!
 

I won't like Leo, it was pretty damn hard there at points. but even though it felt like it, it didn't last forever and now the memory of the hardest parts are fading.

it will be this way for you too, only probably will happen faster for you, because your exposure to these awful drugs is much shorter

 

 

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Happy2Heal
2 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Wow, H2H, who would have thought you'd write this when you joined SA almost 3 years ago! So happy you can write this. 🔆

 

oh my gosh Alto,  you probably thought I was a hopeless case in those first days- er months *blush*  I was so confused, found it so hard to believe that the drs were not the gods they put themselves out there to be. It was hard giving up all my crutches and excuses and rationalizations and just getting on with the work I had to do. I'm proud of myself that I did it, but omg I must have been so hard to deal with there for a while. sorry about that 😕



I truly was a mess.

THANK YOU for never giving up on me, thank for for this forum, thank you for all your hard work and dedication.

I hate to think of where I'd be if I hadn't found this forum 

 

 

 

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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Altostrata

No, I never thought you were a hopeless case! You're very welcome.


This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Happy2Heal

:)

❤️

 


  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictalBrief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 tapered down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again, too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
 

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JLex1981

Congratulations Happy !!!! So happy for you 😃😃😃 enjoy ur life to the fullest !!


John

Zoloft 2001-2003 forget MG's taken, tapered slowly (so I thought) to 0MG in 2003

Withdrawal led me to go on Lexapro 2003

Lexapro 15MG (15 years) 2003-2018

Tapered to 5MG over the last year and 1/2 From 01-2017 thru 04-2018 in 2MG tapers roughly a month each some 2 months or more to stabilize 

5MG Pill  to 4ML/MG Liquid Solution on 03/26/18

04-26-2018 re-upped to 4.4 ML due to withdrawal symptoms

05-06-2018 re-upped to 4.8ML due to withdrawal symptoms

05-07-2018 went to 5MG pill

 

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Miracle123

Hi H2H, Congratulations , awesome and so happy to hear your victory great stories. Hope your healing continue well and enjoy your joyful good life.


Mid December 16 lorezapam 1mg and lexapro 5mg

Early April17 updosed lorezapam 2mg, mid Apr17 taper 1.5mg, mid May17-1.25mg, early Jun17- 1mg, mid Jun17-0.75mg, mid July17-0.5mg, End July 17 reduce from 0.4mg, 0.3mg,0.2mg until 0.1mg.lorezapam free on 9 August 2017.

Early Mar17 updosed to Lexapro 10mg , end Mar17 reduced 7.5mg, mid May17 reduced 0.5mg, End Aug17 reduced 2.5mg, early Sep17 -1.5mg, Mid Sept-1mg, End Sept - 0.5mg .lexapro free on 26 September 2017

 

Supplement- omega fish oil and magnesium citrate only.

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