alex Posted April 11, 2014 Author Share Posted April 11, 2014 Thank you Petu and Jemima. Yes, I know it will get better, I just need to be pattient. Hugs,A. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
alex Posted April 11, 2014 Author Share Posted April 11, 2014 Another big success last night in this important artistic appointmet..... A year ago I wouldn't even thought about doing this....I was VERY sick. At 20+months, I'm still struggling,but windows have become the rule and waves the exception. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Nikki Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 Good for you Alex.....living your life. I was thinking that the in and out sleep might just be the excitement of the two marvelous nights you had. Not WD just excitement..... Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
trouper Posted April 12, 2014 Share Posted April 12, 2014 it sounds like you have more positive posts than negative posts lately. this is such an inspiration to see. thank you for sharing and I'm so glad you have many days of feeling well and hopeful. on 37.5 - 50mg zoloft/sertraline for GAD from 3/1996 to 4/2013 (17 years) too fast taper from 1/13-4/13 Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted April 13, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 13, 2014 ts, I think trouper's comments were meant for Alex. Alex, so glad to hear you had another successful night. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
alex Posted April 15, 2014 Author Share Posted April 15, 2014 One of the most brutal, terroryising setbacks yesterday. Full blown panic attack;And deep depresion and fear afterwards.Really horrible..... But as brutal as it was, it was short lived. Today I feel much better.I am on the healing, good windows path again..... I do know what triggered the setback: I have been over-exerting myself, because I have been feeling much better. BIG mistake; I have to go easy on myself. I am "only" 20 months off.... This is no game, this is serious stuff. 1 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Jemima Posted April 15, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 15, 2014 That's all part of the windows and waves pattern, and it definitely can be set off by over-exertion. I speak from experience. In fact, I have royally screwed up more than a few times by forgetting that I'm still hypersensitive to many things from supplements to stimulants to trying to make up for lost time. The fact that the episode was short-lived is a very good sign. That what seems to happen as withdrawal loses its hold. I'm at 29 months now and feel about 98% over withdrawal. Pus I believe Lexapro is among the lesser of the poisons. It was bad for me, but there seem to be a lot of people who have had it much worse, especially folks who took Paxil and Effexor. Hang loose! Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's RazorIntroduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/ Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers. Link to comment
trouper Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 alex, how wonderful to hear it all passed in a day and you are back to feeling better. inspiring. sometimes when I'm feeling better i forget i have these issues until i think about it. take it easy. on 37.5 - 50mg zoloft/sertraline for GAD from 3/1996 to 4/2013 (17 years) too fast taper from 1/13-4/13 Link to comment
alex Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 Thank you Jemima and trouper for stoping by. Feeling better today. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
alex Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 Bad wave of dysphoria;anxiety,fear,depression. Very discouraged and sad. Suicidal thoughts. I thought I was getting better...and I am in a bad situation again. I think a lot about death. Please help. I have a stomach infection;could that be it? 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
trouper Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 please stay mindful knowing its only the withdrawal and it will pass, just like it always has before. hold tight! on 37.5 - 50mg zoloft/sertraline for GAD from 3/1996 to 4/2013 (17 years) too fast taper from 1/13-4/13 Link to comment
johnson Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Bad wave of dysphoria;anxiety,fear,depression. Very discouraged and sad. Suicidal thoughts. I thought I was getting better...and I am in a bad situation again. I think a lot about death. Please help. I have a stomach infection;could that be it? Just hang on Alex, i'll be waiting for you to post that you are in a very clear and long window. You are due for one soon. Hopefully we all are! Link to comment
Nikki Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Oh Alex.....so sorry. It came on strong didn't it? When a bad panic attack comes up all the other things you described follow it. It is the 'nature' or symptoms of panic. And for someone who has been doing so well it can be very disheartening. It's downright scary. We don't want to go backwards into what we suffered thru. And you won't. It is a temporary set back. When I think of how well and how far along you have come there is no doubt in my mind that you are on the road to recovery and this is going to pass. Maybe it would help to think about how far along you really are. Lots of hugs Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
alex Posted April 17, 2014 Author Share Posted April 17, 2014 Please help!! In a horrific spot here! Worst wave ever! After the Mondays terrible panic attack, I am in a bad shape;worst night sleep last night... It scares me so much...I couldn't sleep until the morning hrs, 3 broken hrs the most...I don't know why but it terrifyfies me so much Deep depression and fear;almost out of reality...suicidal. I don't want to be another statistic... OMG, I don't want to die.... I was doing so well; why? Why?? 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Nikki Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 Alex I sent you a PM.....I did not want you to think I passed this post by so I am letting you know I have responded in a PM Consider yourself hugged Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted April 17, 2014 Member Share Posted April 17, 2014 Alex you know this happens and then gets better eventually. Did something happen? Maybe you slacked off mild walking or getting enough rest even if you couldn't sleep? I feel for you, 20 months is both a long and short time as far as recovery is concerned. You can get back on track. Each time you do your body gets better able to deal with the setbacks. Greetings from the soon to be steamy mangroves of Florida! What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
alex Posted April 17, 2014 Author Share Posted April 17, 2014 Terrifying, krippling anxiety.... Very very scared... Powerful wave, nothing like this before. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
NewMe Posted April 18, 2014 Share Posted April 18, 2014 Alex - let it wash over you and try to detach from judging the experience as positive or negative; in other words - you know the way panic works - it trips you up and lies to you. Fear about panic snowballs if allowed to - It almost sounds like you are having anticipatory panic attacks which magnify the fear and lend itself to intensifying the bout. Its the fear of fear so to speak. Each time it happens it feels like the first time and the worst of all times - This may sound stupid but get out a pen and paper and write down your positive strengths --- what things about you that are good. If you have a puzzle take it out and focus on it for a bit. I do online puzzles to help through those times or a meditation video on youtube. Go sit on the floor and stretch muscles very slowly and practice even breathing. It is okay to be scared - do it anyway. You are okay. You will be okay. It's part of the road to recovery and you are well on your way. I'M A WEANER! atavan PRN ,Paxil approx 20 yrs ago for major depression Switched to Klonopin PRN through to current Paxil wore out Changed to Effexor Depakote added enormous weight gain - flat affect - led to depression - dropped depakote Dropped Effexor, changed to Paxil PDoc added mixed salts amphetamines for ADHD - took for 2 yrs - was ok at first but had to cut as symptoms too intense - then the crash was too much. STOPPED Vyvanse started in 2013 (APRIL) - more smooth than IR amphetamine tabs---Have not used vyvanse daily in full amt since May 2013 Paxil CT withdrawal 10/2012 Klonopin CT WD Switched Klonopin to Xanax prn - too strong WD CT from XANAX after taking for a while - it was awful but can be done if you hold on! Back to Klonopin PRN - working very hard to avoid taking it at all. Effexor 37.5 started 02/2013, 75mg by 03/2013, 150mg by 05/2012 (approx) Effexor 150mg 3/10/2014 Microtaper -3beads 3/11/2014-4beads ,3/12/14 - 5, 3/13/14 -6, 3/15/14 - 7, 3/18 - 8, 3/22 - 10, 3/24 - 12, 4/6 - 13, 4/7 - 14, 4/11 - 16 - on 4/19 ran out of brand took generic. Bad move. Back on brand on 4/20 and updosed 2 beads. 5/1 - 15, 5/6 - 16, 5/9 -17, 55/10 -17, 5/15 -18, 5/21 -19, 5/24 -20, 6/3 - 21, 6/6 -23, 6/13 -24,6/19- 25, 6/21 -26, 6/25 -27 6/28 -28, 6/29 -30, 7/3 -34, 7/8 -35, 7/17 -36, 7/30 -41,7/31 -42, 8/2 -43, 8/3 -44, 8/5 -45, 8/14 -48, 8/26-50, 9/24 -53, 10/24 -55, 12/1 -57, (lost the tally sheet, thus taper info for some of it), 4/19-63, 4/26-64, 4/30-65 Switched to wt reduction - now @ -.068, 7/14 -.070, August 2015 -.074, between Sept & October 10 -.077, Nov. -.078(feeling great), -.090 as of 1/10/16, down to -.101 since January 2016 (it is now 6/24/16), -.105 as of 8/13/16 Ladies, please don't underestimate the possibility of perimenopause. The symptoms can be similar to, may intensify & in some cases mimic protracted w/d from ssri's & benzo's. Link to comment
alex Posted April 18, 2014 Author Share Posted April 18, 2014 Thanks my good friends;trying to survive one more day.... 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted April 18, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 18, 2014 Hi Alex, I'm sorry I didn't realized you had been hit with a wave, I've been struggling to keep up with posts this week due to having problems myself. Your stomach infection could be contributing, anything which causes added stress, how is that now? Your recent positive singing achievements, even though a good thing, even good things can add stress. Whatever caused it, it doesn't matter, just know that it will pass and focus on taking extra care of yourself while it does. Every day we get through is another day of healing. (hugs) Petu. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
alex Posted April 18, 2014 Author Share Posted April 18, 2014 Quite a good sleep last night;feeling much better today. Lesson learned:avoid stressful situations. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Jemima Posted April 19, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 19, 2014 One more lesson learned, and it's an important one. And yes, having a stomach infection could easily trigger a wave. Think of how people feel when they're sick--tired, uncomfortable, irritable, unable to sleep....Illness strongly resembles a wave, and I think we're all susceptible to feeling extra bad in withdrawal. I had a really bad time last fall when I thought I was coming down with pneumonia, or at least bronchitis. I'm very glad to see that you're feeling better today. Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's RazorIntroduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/ Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers. Link to comment
Lexy Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 Had you taken something for the stomach infection? Could that have the cause? Started Effexor August 2012 Sept'12-150mg=extreme anxiety Oct'12 cut half-75mg severe wds Feb 2013 68.5mg. Mar'13- 65mg. Apr'13-59mg. May'13-57mg. June '13-52mg Aug'13 49.75mg. Sep'13-48.75. Nov'13-47mg Dec'13-45..5mg May 2014 42mg. Jun'14 40mg (depressive mood started). Aug'14 -40mg/ started brintellix 2.5mg Oct '14 -39 Nov'14 36.89 Dec'14 34.45 Jan 2015- 31 Feb'15 29mg. Mar'15 26.72. Apr'15 24.48. May'15 22.31mg. Jun'15 20.30mg Aug'15-18.89. Oct'15 16.96. Nov/16- 16.10. Dec/15- 15mg Jan 2016-14.22. May'16 11.45. Aug'16-9.60. Sep/16- 8.88mg. Oct/16- 8.39mg. Nov/16- 8.13. Dec/16- 7.89 Link to comment
Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted April 19, 2014 Member Share Posted April 19, 2014 I'm glad too Alex. You don't have to feel you always have to be strong for us, we understand. Our WD wracked bodies don't handle the stress of illness well. But you got sleep! Yay! What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
alex Posted April 19, 2014 Author Share Posted April 19, 2014 The horrible crippling wave of anxiety is overwhelming... Trying to survive one more day. Suicidal. I am sorry. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted April 19, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 19, 2014 Alex, hang in there. This is how it goes. You have felt much better, and you will feel better again. And one day you will be very, very glad that you hung in there. Sometimes when I am really low I think: I'm just going to hang in there for one more day at the beach, one more blooming lilac bush, one more hug from my daughters. It may be dark and gray and those good times may seem impossible or far away, but they will come, and they will be worth it. All you have to do is keep walking one step at a time today. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
skybert Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 Hang in there alex. I'm currently on the floor having the same idea. It's not real! All we have to do is breathe. Started Esctialopram (Lexapro) 10mg june 2012. 20mg august 2012.15mg february 2013 - 10mg april 2013 - 5mg may 2013 0mg - 26.june 2013 Crashed mid. august 2013. Reinstated 2mg Escitalopram 22.september 2013 2.5mg 29 september 2013, 3mg 15 november 2013. First taper from 3mg to 2.7mg 10 may 2014 Micro cuts since then. Current dose september 2017 1.7mg Current supplements: Nothing. (GI issues) Link to comment
Nikki Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 Alex I am still laughing over you thinking that my avatar says I am from Jupiter as a joke because of being on meds I really do live in Jupiter Earth USA Florida Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
NewMe Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 Alex You did ok on the 18th;. You can do okay again. Today was off - but it wont always be like this. HUG I'M A WEANER! atavan PRN ,Paxil approx 20 yrs ago for major depression Switched to Klonopin PRN through to current Paxil wore out Changed to Effexor Depakote added enormous weight gain - flat affect - led to depression - dropped depakote Dropped Effexor, changed to Paxil PDoc added mixed salts amphetamines for ADHD - took for 2 yrs - was ok at first but had to cut as symptoms too intense - then the crash was too much. STOPPED Vyvanse started in 2013 (APRIL) - more smooth than IR amphetamine tabs---Have not used vyvanse daily in full amt since May 2013 Paxil CT withdrawal 10/2012 Klonopin CT WD Switched Klonopin to Xanax prn - too strong WD CT from XANAX after taking for a while - it was awful but can be done if you hold on! Back to Klonopin PRN - working very hard to avoid taking it at all. Effexor 37.5 started 02/2013, 75mg by 03/2013, 150mg by 05/2012 (approx) Effexor 150mg 3/10/2014 Microtaper -3beads 3/11/2014-4beads ,3/12/14 - 5, 3/13/14 -6, 3/15/14 - 7, 3/18 - 8, 3/22 - 10, 3/24 - 12, 4/6 - 13, 4/7 - 14, 4/11 - 16 - on 4/19 ran out of brand took generic. Bad move. Back on brand on 4/20 and updosed 2 beads. 5/1 - 15, 5/6 - 16, 5/9 -17, 55/10 -17, 5/15 -18, 5/21 -19, 5/24 -20, 6/3 - 21, 6/6 -23, 6/13 -24,6/19- 25, 6/21 -26, 6/25 -27 6/28 -28, 6/29 -30, 7/3 -34, 7/8 -35, 7/17 -36, 7/30 -41,7/31 -42, 8/2 -43, 8/3 -44, 8/5 -45, 8/14 -48, 8/26-50, 9/24 -53, 10/24 -55, 12/1 -57, (lost the tally sheet, thus taper info for some of it), 4/19-63, 4/26-64, 4/30-65 Switched to wt reduction - now @ -.068, 7/14 -.070, August 2015 -.074, between Sept & October 10 -.077, Nov. -.078(feeling great), -.090 as of 1/10/16, down to -.101 since January 2016 (it is now 6/24/16), -.105 as of 8/13/16 Ladies, please don't underestimate the possibility of perimenopause. The symptoms can be similar to, may intensify & in some cases mimic protracted w/d from ssri's & benzo's. Link to comment
alex Posted April 22, 2014 Author Share Posted April 22, 2014 Here I am:I didn't die....I tought I was going to.... After one hellish week, and the most brutal, frightening relapse ever, here I am on track again. 21 months off the legal poison Effexor, and counting... I hope society and the "status quo" as we know it learn some day about the dramatic consecuences of these drugs. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Narcissus Posted April 22, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 22, 2014 The setbacks are terrible aren't they? It sounds like you're at least somewhat out of the storm. Try to remember, this is all progress! 3 Years 150 mgs Effexor 2 month taper down to zero 3 terrible weeks at zero Back up to 75 mgs 2 months at 75 6 or so months back to regular dose of 150 - was able to restabilize fine. 3 month taper back to zero 1 HORRENDOUS week at zero 2 days back up to 37.5 3 days back up to 75 One week at 150 - unable to stabilize. Back down to 75 mgs At 75 mgs (half original dose) and suffering withdrawal symptoms since October 2012. "It is a radical cure for all pessimism to become ill, to remain ill for a good while, and then grow well for a still longer period." - Nietzsche Link to comment
alex Posted April 22, 2014 Author Share Posted April 22, 2014 High cortisol night and morning again...the monster wont let go.... 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
alex Posted April 22, 2014 Author Share Posted April 22, 2014 Nice to see you again my good friend Narcissus. Thank you for your support. 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Nikki Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 Alex there is a thread somewhere about waves and patterns after getting off meds. Apparently it can happen at the two year mark. With all of the successes you have had this is just a blip:) Bump in the road.....I do know that it is very uncomfortable, but I can't believe that it will last....you have come far and done very well. Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
alex Posted April 23, 2014 Author Share Posted April 23, 2014 Very clear window today after a hellish terrifying week..... 4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months. Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.First 3 months off acute w/dProtracted w/d ever since.Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD 04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast. 3 years and 4 months off. waves and windows.Very much recovered. November 2015,health issue.Setback. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Jemima Posted April 23, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 23, 2014 Good news. I found that sometimes my worst waves were followed by my best windows. When it comes to getting through withdrawal, it seems that healing often hurts. So glad you are better ! Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's RazorIntroduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/ Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers. Link to comment
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